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Post by BookerShark on May 17, 2011 12:11:23 GMT -5
Ecosystem walks in on IQ hanging back in the lounge area, title belt over his shoulder.
IQ: Ah, the CEO. To what do I owe the visit?
Eco: Such formality--"Champ" would work fine. IQ, would it surprise you to say I like your style?
IQ: A bit, yes, given that we haven't interacted enough for you to assess "my style."
Eco: You're a manipulator, IQ. A puppet master. Lisa got you exactly right, and I sympathize with the instinct.
IQ: I'm merely doing my best to assist Psykle in keeping his rage under control. At no point am I looking forward to my own advance--
Eco: Sure, sure. But manipulation doesn't have to be self-centered. You've seen the tapes, you know where Firewoman was a year ago and where she is today. Do you think that the respectable commissioner you see today could exist without the training of Trinity?
IQ: I don't live inside her mind, how could I know that?
Eco: You do know, though. And she does too. Look, Psykle is a monster in the ring, but I understand he needs more control. And I think a very regimented schedule--perhaps of media appearances, press conferences, what have you--combined with all the adulation and respect it would bring, that he would see every day...it would have a very calming effect.
IQ: I know what you're offering, and I'm going to have to--
Eco: Consider it. Because no one as intelligent as you would respond to that offer so quickly. Though I will ask you this...how would Psykle respond to knowing he was essentially offered the World Championship...and you said no on his behalf?
Eco turns and walks away.
FADE
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Post by BookerShark on May 17, 2011 12:12:29 GMT -5
The Darling gang is still FROLICKING~! on the beach. Firewoman and Opus have moved under a large sun shade, and are watching live coverage of the lift off of Space Shuttle Endeavor's final flight. Fire appears to be pretty choked up over it, which people have stopped seeing as odd, given how frequently its been happening the last month or so. What is surprising is seeing Opus also get choked up...somewhat because who thought penguins got choked up about such things? Fire notices this.
FW: Dude...you're a penguin. Penguins don't cry.
Opus flaps his wings in response.
FW: Heh...You can do that all you want, they don't work.
OtP: *flap flap flap*
FW: Wait...don't.....is that what this is?
OtP: *flap flap flap*
FW: But I've seen March of the Penguins. You fly underwater. It's awesome.
OtP: *flap flap flap*...*sigh*
FW: Oh...I'm sorry....I didn't know......
Opus waddles out to the center, puts his wings behind his back, and begins to speak, with surprising perfect diction for a penguin.
"Lord, you gave us feet to waddle, a tux for tails and bods like bottles...
but 'scuse us if we find no levity, since you also gave us gravity.
But to adversity, we say nuts! And when it's time to fly the coop, we flap and beat to lift our butts... and we're left as walking nincompoops.
So Lord, I'd think you more than wise, (and me much less a jerk) if only once you might supply... ... some penguin wings that work." **
Opus takes a deep bow, and waddles back under the sunshade, leaving the rest of the Darling clan stunned. He sits down in his baby pool, and sighs.
**From a Sunday Bloom County cartoon, I can't remember when.
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Post by BookerShark on May 17, 2011 12:13:28 GMT -5
*Davin, Samantha and Shawn are all sitting around in some sort of brainstorming session about a potential business to expand GOAT Enterprises Inc. LLC into. Suddenly Moonbeam comes running (literally) into the room. She's moving and talking about as fast as we've ever seen her. She's also in full hippie regalia complete with flowers in her hair. She's brought a box with her*
SFJ420: DUDE! They're HERE!
DM: What's here?
*She tears the box open and pulls out a black t-shirt. There's a peace sign on the front, along with the words "Make History, Not War" surrounding it. On the back it says "Davin Moreland - The GOAT" along with the next few months of the OOWF Tour Schedule. She hands them out to everyone and they all put them on. Except for Davin*
SFJ420: Don't you like it?
DM: Oh yeah, definitely, Moony. *he pulls on his "LD Williams is a Fraud" t-shirt* But I haven't filled my weekly commitment of this one, yet.
OGMSJ: How is that going by the way?
DM: Mrs. Williams is going to have a really nice nursing home. That's for sure.
SDM: That's kind of mean.
DM: Don't you remember? She tried to start shit with Mom. That didn't work out so well for her.
SDM: Ah, yeah, forgot about that.
DM: Notice how nice and quiet things have been here this week? Calm. Relaxing. Everyone's focused on wrestling? Nice.
SDM: Well, thanks to Moose getting himself suspended, people don't have to worry about a raging psychopath stalking them around the arena.
SFJ420: Even Stank came out for peace, man. Everyone loves peace.
OGMSJ: Except Samantha's brother.
SDM: Sometimes he has a good sense about these things.
DM: Sometimes he's looking for something to do, too.
SDM: Yeah, there's that.
DM: Moose the hypocrite. That comes to the surprise of absolutely no one. Getting yourself suspended makes you a pussy and a coward...unless Moose does it, then it's a conspiratorial plot to screw Moose. Delusional doesn't even begin to describe it. Can you believe he tried to justify it?
SDM, OGMSJ, SFJ420: Yes.
DM: I suppose you're right.
OGMSJ: Are you going to take that 60-minute Iron Man match?
DM: I'll take any match. I'm going to win anyway, so it really doesn't matter.
SDM: Do you think he's really trying to put the moves on A'isha?
DM: Looks that way. I'm sure Poe is thrilled.
OGMSJ: You think so?
DM: No, I don't think so. I'm pretty sure Poe would be against potentially having that extensive level of mental illness potentially in the al-Tikriti gene pool.
OGMSJ: But Selena-
DM: Selena's a pussycat compared to Moose. Maybe A'isha not so much, but I can't imagine he'd be FOR this.
SFJ420: Dude, I don't get the 2 of them together. At all.
DM: You kidding? They're perfect for each other.
SFJ420: How?
DM: A'isha cares only about A'isha, and Moose only cares about Moose. Neither of them have any concept of loyalty or family or empathy. They're both sociopaths. It's like Nicky and Mallory. Just adorable.
SDM: Gotta love a good Natural Born Killers reference.
OGMSJ: In all seriousness, Davin. You're really not concerned? Even a little?
DM: No.
OGMSJ: At all?
DM: At. All.
OGMSJ: Shouldn't you?
DM: Why? I'm better than Moose at everything. I'm a better wrestler. I'm a better brawler. I've got a higher pain threshold. I'm bigger. And I can say one thing that he can't.
OGMSJ: What's that?
DM: I've never quit. Never tapped out. Never let another man make me give up. Moose? Hell, *I* have made him tap, let alone all the others...including Alex. I know this, and deep down, he knows this. I do not have a breaking point. He does. Therefore, Davin wins. It's that simple.
OGMSJ: ...
DM: But you already knew that. *wink*
OGMSJ: Clever.
*fade*
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Post by BookerShark on May 17, 2011 12:14:17 GMT -5
<Moose and Aisha are in a bar in Tokyo, a nice one for a change. Aisha's phone buzzes and she flips it open and its Davin Moreland's promo, she shows Moose, Moose watches it and just shakes his head>
Aisha: That's all?
MHJ: What is there to say? Davin thinks he is ten feet tall and bulletproof
Aisha: No yelling or threatening?
MHJ: Nope. I will put it simply. I have tapped. I am sure Davin sees that as a sign of weakness, Davin is an idiot. Tap today, live to fight another day. But Davin, our match is not a submission match, so it makes no difference. Would I tap to a move rather than risk a broken bone? Maybe. Why would I do that? Because that would just mean I was up five to one instead of pitching the shutout.
Aisha: He thinks he is better than you
MHJ: Of course he does. He thinks he is better than everyone. Alex also though he was better than me. How did that work out for him?
Aisha: You sound confident
MHJ: It is what it is. Davin is good, but he is not good enough to put me away. Period. That's fact. He can try, and I have no doubt I will bleed, and he will bleed, and both of us will be worse for the wear afterward. But the fact remains this......Davin can't beat me. He won't get the job done, again. Period. End of story.
Aisha: So......I talked to some people, they are ready whenever we are.
MHJ: All in good time. There is no hurry. I have to call Stank, Fulton, LD and Tytan tomorrow, after that, we will sit and decide what we are doing. For now......we enjoy life.
<Moose takes a long drink and lights up a cigar and laughs as we fade>
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Post by BookerShark on May 17, 2011 12:15:32 GMT -5
*OOWF-TV shows the following clip C-SPAN-style, saying 'Saturday PM' on the top*
*Welcome to the Bellefontaine, Ohio Middle School Gym, where IWA-Mid South (The re-Mid Southening) has come to visit. In front of maybe 200 people, your IWA-Mid South Women's Champion, let's call her Lady GagMe, has just finished a scathing promo about how no one can beat her. Let's see if you've figured out where this is going*
*Suddenly, "Whatchu Want" comes over the PA, and the crowd, such as they are, goes batshit as the IWA-Mid South Tag Team Champions, Nothing Happened, appears at the entrance. Alexis is dressed to wrestle. Davin's not, but he's still wearing his belt, along with jeans and his "LD Williams is a Fraud" t-shirt. They climb into the ring after signing autographs for the entire audience. Davin sits on a turnbuckle as Alexis grabs a mic*
AD: Really, Lady Dumbass? NO one can beat you? What about 1/2 of the IWA-Mid South Tag Team Champions, huh?
LGM: No. You're nothing but a washed-out whore who got lucky with Davin carrying you...AGAIN...
*They both look to Davin, who starts chuckling*
AD: Then put it on the line, bitch. IWA-Mid South Women's Championship Match. You beat me, you prove your point. I beat you? I'm the first 3-Time IWA-Mid South Women's Champion. What do you say?
LGM: Fuck off, whore, that's what!
*Before she can hand the microphone out of the ring, Alexis BLASTS her with a forearm*
Lady GagMe (c) vs Alexis Darling - IWA - Mid South Women's Championship Match
Alexis starts throwing straight right hands at the clearly surprised GagMe. Whip off the ropes, and Alexis kills her with a Flapjack. She rolls GagMe over into a surfboard...and then a MOTHERFUCKING CURBSTOMP! Crowd pops huge for this! She drags GagMe to the corner...PHOENIX SPLASH! It's over! But Alexis isn't. She drags the lifeless corpse of Lady GagMe to her feet, puts her own hand around her throat...Alexis looks directly to the camera and then smiles, waves and mouths "Hi Alex!". DARLING DRIVER! This girl never had a chance.
YOUR WINNER in 1:39 by PINFALL and NEW IWA-MS Women's Champion...ALEXIS DARLING!
*Postmatch, Davin hops back into the ring and puts Alexis on his shoulders as she celebrates her new belt, and in IWA-Mid South land, anyway, she's the new Gnarliest Double Champ Ever!*
*fade*
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Post by BookerShark on May 17, 2011 12:16:34 GMT -5
Oh, Death, Oh Death, oh Death, Won't you spare me over til another year
<we see a hooded figure walking through the street in Nacala>
But what is this, that I cant see with ice cold hands taking hold of me
<the camera pans, we see a couple white men in suits are outside in sunglasses, pushing around some local, laughing.>
When God is gone and the Devil takes hold, who will have mercy on your soul
<The Hooded One moves in and picks up a large clay jar. The Hood is unnoticed>
Oh, Death, Oh Death, oh Death, No wealth, no ruin, no silver, no gold Nothing satisfies me but your soul
<As the white men throw the man to the ground and begin to kick, the hooded figure smashes a clay jar against the back of one of them, knocking him to the ground. The other turns around, but the Hood kicks him in the gut and stomps his head into the stones on the ground.>
Oh, Death, Well I am Death, none can excel, I'll open the door to heaven or hell.
<slowly, the Hooded One picks up the man on the ground. The Hood reaches into the cloak, and pulls out some money, giving it to the man. He nods, thanks the shadowed man, and runs away.>
Oh, Death, Oh Death,
<The Hooded One walks behind an alley. Slowly, the man kicked into the stones gets up and dashes behind the alley to find…no one.>
my name is Death and the end ïs here...
<A date comes across the screen…>
06-08-11
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Post by BookerShark on May 17, 2011 12:17:19 GMT -5
Kai, Aina, Alexander Darling, Spencer Darling, Ashley Davies, and Alexis Darling are all enjoying their last day on the beach in Mozambique still. Firewoman has recently joined along with Opus. They also have a few security guards around (usually need them in Africa). Suddenly the security guards alert the group to a woman walking towards them on the beach.Kai: Kono!! Kai rushes towards Kono and grabs her in his arms for a huge hug, spinning her around as he does. He lets her down and kisses her as Aina and Alexander approach them.Kai: Howzit Ko`u Aloha! What are you doin’ here? Aina: Yeah, what are you doin’ here? Kono: Nice to see you too Aina. AD: You must be Kono. I’ve heard so much about you from this one. Alex extends his hand. Kono shakes it.Kono: Kono Kalakawa. I’ve heard a lot about you too. From a lot of different people. Aina: What are you doing here? Kai: Bruddah… Kono: No, Aina’s right. It’s not good. Kai: What’s wrong? Are you okay? Do I need to kill some piggies? Kono: I’m in some trouble, so I just needed to get away. Plus I missed you, Kai. Aina: What kind of trouble? AD: I can get you a good lawyer if you need it. Kono: It’s all a misunderstanding about a case we were working. IA’s gotten involved. I’ve been placed on leave. It’s all a big mess. And thanks, Mr. Darling, but I have a lawyer. Aina: You fled? Kono: No. My lawyer got me permission to leave the island. I just have to check in with the DA every so often. Aina: Who got you the lawyer? They seem to know what they’re doing. Kono: Your friend. Omar al-Takriti. Kai: You went to Poe?? Kono: Yeah, I hope that’s alright. You always said, Aina, if I… Aina: I know. Omar’s my brah an’ all, but there’s always a catch, Kono. Kai hugs Kono again.Kai: Did the right thing. AD: Kono, seriously, if you need anything… Darling’s attention is caught by a bloop on his laptop. Firewoman leans over to look at it, and then gives Darling a questioning, perhaps angry look.Kono: Thank you, Mr. Darling. Aina shakes his head and walks off. Alex shakes Kono’s hand again and walks over to his laptop, picking it up.AD: It’s nothing. Just a friend. FW: Sure it is. You don’t have to explain to me. C’mon Opus, let’s go swim. O: *flap flap flap* After Firewoman leaves, Alex clicks on the OK to the video chat request from “MoonGoddess92”.AD: Hello again, Selena. Meanwhile, as Kai and Kono go for a swim together, Aina sits near the grass alone. Spencer joins him.SD: I recognize a stink eye when I see it. You don’t like Kai’s girlfriend? Aina: Nothing not to like. SD: No kidding. She’s gorgeous. Aina gives Spencer a side glance.Aina: She used to be mine. SD: What?! Awkward. Aina: We were dating. She met Kai. They fell for each other. I stepped away. SD: That’s…noble. Aina: He’s my bruddah. Not gonna let some wahine come between us. SD: But it seems to bother you. Aina: I’m happy for them. Doesn’t mean I have to be happy ABOUT them. Spencer hugs Aina.Meanwhile, back with Alex…AD: Kai’s girlfriend just showed up. Sa-T: I figured that’s where she was headed. AD: How much trouble is she in? Sa-T: Nothing Omar’s lawyers can’t fix. AD: And what’s Poe get out of helping her? Sa-T: I dunno dude. Omar’s always had a soft spot for Kai and Aina, so maybe he’s just doin’ it out of the goodness of his… Selena stops due to the look Alex is giving her.Sa-T: I dunno dude. He’s been weird lately. He’s even talking to Noelani a lot, and usually they don’t like being in the same room together. AD: Noelani’s back in Hilo? Sa-T: yeah. They have some “project” they’re working on. AD: Or they’re… Sa-T: Don’t even dude. AD: This is Poe we’re talking about. Sa-T: Pfft, we’re together 24/7. He don’t have time for that. Besides, I take care of… Alex puts his hands to his ears.AD: LA LA LA LA. Sa-T: You’re such a dork face. Just then, Selena’s phone rings. She looks at the caller.Sa-T: It’s the board. AD: I’ll let you take that. Aloha. Sa-T: Peace dude. *click*
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Post by BookerShark on May 17, 2011 12:18:08 GMT -5
*Fade in to the Nacala Multi-Purpose Sporting Complex and Cement Works, where we find El Lobo Sangriento patiently WAITING~! with SFJ175 for his interview to begin. Why they couldn’t have started the interview already is anyone’s guess. Maybe they’re waiting for a third party to join them. Maybe they’re waiting for a lighting change. Maybe…hold on, something’s happening here…yes, Lobo is definitely growing less patient than he was only moments ago. We’ll stay with this story as it devel–
ELS: DUDE. SHUT THE FUCK UP.
*Oh. Apparently, they were waiting for me to finish my intro. My bad. Here’s SFJ 175 bringing you, the OOWF viewers, an exclusive interview with El Lobo Sangriento, the likes of which–
ELS: Seriously, dude. Can it.
*…
ELS: Much better. Now, Miss 175, you asked me to be here. What can I help you with?
SFJ: Lobo, you turned down the CEO’s offer to become the Corporate Champion earlier this week. Would you care to elaborate on your reasons for doing so?
ELS: Well, for starters, it’s not the Corporate Champion, it’s his Corporate Champion. I won’t sell out my values to be a puppet. I won’t allow Eco to play games with me like that.
SFJ: Aren’t you worried that the CEO will find a reason to get rid of you now that you’ve turned him down?
ELS: Not at all. Eco has a massive ego, and I’ve bruised it a couple of times recently. If he fires me now, he’s admitting to the world that I won. That I got the better of him. That he can’t play by the rules, so he needs to get rid of those of us who can. Also, Wolfpack t-shirts are flying off the shelves.
SFJ: And what do you think about the CEO taking his offer to Psykle?
ELS: I’m not at all surprised. Psykle’s got a ton of upside potential. He’ll be a great champion one day. I just hope he doesn’t take the easy road. It’s really one of those “if it looks too good to be true, it probably is” situations. But that’s Psykle’s decision to make. I’m assuming if he turns the offer down, Eco will hit up Sparxx next. It’s a little sad, actually.
SFJ: Are you still confident that you can win the title from the CEO fairly on Wednesday?
ELS: I’m confident that I can give it my best shot. Can I beat Stank, Sparxx, and Psykle first? If it was one-on-one against any of them, I think so. No disrespect – I think any of those would be great matches. Can I beat all three of them in a fatal fourway? Well, I’ve got a 25% chance. Same as everyone else. These matches are so unpredictable. I expect it to be a free-for-all out there. Like I said, I’ve got as good a chance as any of my opponents at winning. As far as facing Eco afterward, well, I think the fact that he offered to hand me the title speaks volumes. He doesn’t want to face me again, and I don’t blame him. When I get my hands on him again, I plan to do the same thing I did last time: beat him clean.
SFJ: Final thoughts?
ELS: Just to wish my opponents luck. It’s a hell of an opportunity we’ve been given, and I expect nothing but A-Game from all three of them. I’m looking forward to having my Wolfpack howling for me out there. Should be fun. See you at Mayhem, boys.
*FADE*
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Post by BookerShark on May 17, 2011 13:03:13 GMT -5
We are in the Hallway of Random Encounters, where Ecosystem is walking by. Suddenly, IQ's secretary, Miss Goldendollar approaches him.
MG$: Mr. Ecosystem, sir?
Eco: Just call me Champ...what can I do for you?
MG$: IQ asked me to give you this.
Miss Goldendollar hands Eco an envelope and walks off. Eco opens the envelope and pulls out a letter which reads:
Eco-
Let's talk, but this talk needs to be in private. I have a secure location we can meet at where those damn ninja-cams can't get in. My limo is waiting in the garage if you're interested.
-IQ
Fade to black
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Post by BookerShark on May 17, 2011 13:05:03 GMT -5
~~~ Fade into nearby Alacan, (Very Weak Cheap Pop) Mozambique and there is yet another OOWF House show in progress. In the Main event, Perry "The Icebox" Williams has just flattened The Sun Devil Kid in about 45 seconds. The crowd is booing pretty heavily. Williams grabs a mic and garbles his way through a promo ~~~
PW: That's what is in store for ANYONE who steps in the ring with me. Now that I put that LOSER of a tag team partner Jordan Michaels out of commission, I have no one to hold me back. The Icebox is unstoppable! There isn't anyone in this arena able to take me down!
~~~ Crowd boos louder ~~~
PW: In fact, I challenge anyone in the back, anyone here in the arena, come get a piece of Perry Williams! Come take me on!
~~~ And naturally, it doesn't take long for him to get his wish [url=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mbH60wCO-Yw ]"God Blessed Texas"[/url] fires up, and "Cowboy" Chad Madison walks to the ring. The crowd is nearly frenzied, not expecting an OOWF Superstar to make an appearance, much less accept an open challenge.
Chad climbs in the ring and walks up to Perry Williams, who still has the mic ~~~
PW: Well looky here. Chad Madison. DDT Ironman Heavy Metal Champion. Looks like someone else is ready to shuck the baggage of a tag team partner. Well son, The Icebox thinks he'll whup yo ass and win himself a title belt tonight.
~~~ Chad doesn't say a word, he takes the belt off and lays it across the middle of the ring and beckons Williams to "Come and get it." a referee runs to ringside, and looks like we'll have an official match for the OOWF DDT Ironman Heavy Metal Title.
The bell sounds, and Perry charges Chad. Chad ducks and rolls forward, springing to his feet and dropkicking Williams from behind into the corner. Chad backs up and goes for a Stinger Splash, But Williams catches him in mid-air and PLANTS Chad with a belly to belly suplex! Williams gets to his feet and calls for the Big Chill! He hoists Chad up, but he slides down Williams back and catches him with a dropkick. Chad pulls Williams to his feet and sends him into the ropes.. Kick Wham DDT! Perry struggles to his feet, and eats ANOTHER dropkick. Chad scrambles to the top turnbuckle... walks the ropes...
Announcer: SHADES OF KEVIN VON ERICH! OH MY GOSH!
... and flys off the top rope, connecting with a Big Lariat! Williams crumbles to the mat and Madison covers & gets the 1...2...3! Winner, and Still DDT Ironman Heavy Metal Champion, Chad Madison
The Crowd pops, Chad gathers his title and heads up the ramp, high fiving fans along the way.
We start to fade...... Then MAGICAL TIME SHIFT!!!
.... And we see Chad walking into the Texpress dressing room. Zane and Bridgette are seated at a table, discussing something. ~~~
Zane: What was all that about?
Chad: What?
Zane: You went to Alacan alone?
Chad: So? You two were occupied, and I needed a workout.
Zane: There's wasn't a SFJ available?
Chad: A WRESTLING workout, jerk. You remember wrestling, right. The reason we're here?
Zane: Quit being a smart mouth
Chad: Then let's get to work on Drink & Destroy.
Zane: Fine.
Chad: Fine.
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Post by BookerShark on May 17, 2011 13:41:06 GMT -5
Ecosystem takes the envelope and pockets it. He walks outside to the parking lot and bumps into...Alexander Darling.
Eco: You look nice and tanned.
Alex: You didn't book me for any press appearances, I spent some time on the beach.
Eco: Nice Onslaught Championship you've got there.
Alex: Nice World Championship you've got there.
Eco & Alex: ...Shame if something happened to it.
They both smirk.
Eco: Alexander, I know you're a smart man, and I know you make some very good calculations. I was listening to your promo earlier.
Eco: You recognize, Alexander, that if I lose my World Title tomorrow, your chance to become a double champion at PPV Title TBA is snatched away from you. It seems it would be overwhelmingly in your interest to ensure that didn't happen.
Alexander leans in to Ecosystem.
Alex: You know, Juni...running around to Stank, me, Lobo, Psykle...I'm enjoying watching you squirm. You're running out of options fast, and you know it. I'm not willing to be played by you.
Eco: (glaring) See Alex...this is what pisses me off. People claim they're unwilling to be played on principle, not even considering if there are real benefits for them. Stank walked out on me, and went from World Champion to sparring with curtain-jerkers. President, Knife, Infieri, Dead and Voltage all fell off the face of the earth after they left me. Firewoman floundered after leaving me until she returned to the warm arms of my authority as commissioner. Tytan walked out on me, and went from World Champion to butt boy for a washed-up veteran.
Ecosystem gestures broadly to his "LD Williams Is A Fraud" t-shirt.
Alexander: Aside from your skewed perspective on Fire, you're missing one thing in your historical examples, Juni.
Eco: And what's that?
Alexander: I'm Alexander Darling, and well...they're just not. See you at PPV Title TBA.
Alexander walks off.
Eco: Suit yourself, fucker--but the lines are open.
FADE
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Post by BookerShark on May 18, 2011 15:22:22 GMT -5
Ecosystem turns to stalk off and runs NEARLY into Firewoman. He doesn't actually touch her, because then she could argue self defense.
FW: Juni.
Eco: I so miss when you called me Sensei....couldn't we do that when it's just the two of us?
FW: No.
Eco: Shame....so what--
FW: Leave me out of it.
Eco: Out of--
FW: You keep using me as some example of what good you've accomplished. I'm asking...no, I'm telling you....stop.
Eco: But, Lisa.....it's the truth. Do you REALLY think you'd have been a good commissioner without my training? Do you think you'd be on the path you're on, a changed woman, without the pain and rage of your past?
FW: I think you'll find that when it comes to you, I'm very far from being without rage.
Eco: Maybe not...but I'm still standing, aren't I? Unlike ... oh what was that poor fellow's name you and your brother hunted down in Japan--
FW: I'm telling you what I told Psykle's mentor. I now know what it's like. I see what you're offering him and Lobo. No one stopped you, and I understand why...but you try that again...and *I* will stop you.
Eco: You are more than welcome to try....
A bit of a stand off, and Eco slowly circles Fire, not taking his eyes off of her, until he gets behind her and then he turns and continues the direction he is going. Fire takes a deep breath, clenches her fists, and walks the opposite direction.
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Post by BookerShark on May 18, 2011 15:23:09 GMT -5
*Moonbeam, wearing her "Make History, Not War" t-shirt, along with Samantha and Shawn, are sitting around Davin's locker room. Suddenly Moonbeam's phone goes off as she gets a text ( This is the Ringtone).* SFJ420: It's Davin. They're here! *The three rush up to make preparations of some kind it looks like, as they turn the lights off. There's indistinct chatter from the other side of the door until Davin opens it. Alexis Darling is with him, with a title belt over each shoulder* AD: Where are they? *As soon as she says that, the lights come on, and THIS starts playing from somewhere. Everyone starts cheering and hovering around Alexis, who is smiling pretty much bigger than we've ever seen. The music stops and everyone sits down. Alexis has Davin on one side, and Samantha, with her arm around her baby sister, on the other* SFJ420: Dude, I like, couldn't believe it when I saw it. I mean, I like totally thought the first one was like fake or whatever, man. OGMSJ: I know, I mean...I thought you two...I mean... SDM: I was surprised myself when he first told me. DM: Listen, everyone knows that Alexis and I have always had a...what's the word... AD: Volatile? DM: *smiles* Yeah, volatile relationship. I mean, we've had highs, we've had lows, I've done some shitty things, she's done some shitty things that didn't necessarily make TV...but the bottom line is- AD: We're family. DM: That. Also, the Davin Express always chugs along a lot smoother if Alexis is on board as the conductor. AD: And as much as some brothers who I won't name might disagree, the Darling Express is the same thing. OGMSJ: So weird. I didn't see this coming at all. SDM: You should have, Shawn. These two are so similar in so many ways...so different in others...but as they just proved last week, together, they're unstoppable. DM: Plus, Alexis DID introduce me to my wife. I can't stay mad at her forever. *There's like a group hug on the couch. It's pretty gag-inducing* SFJ420: So, are you like, going to tag here now too? AD: Nah, I'm a singles wrestler in OOWF these days. IWA-Mid South was just to keep in ring shape. You know, for as long as those matches lasted anyway. OGMSJ: But how did you two...I mean, when did you start talking again? DM: We were at Ric's, no one else was around, and we were sitting in opposite ends of the cafeteria. AD: So he got up, and I thought we were gonna fight; but instead he sat down and we talked some stuff out. DM: It went better than I thought. SFJ420: So what does this mean? OGMSJ: Are you getting the band back together? SDM: *smiles* Well, let's not rush things yet. DM: However, speaking of the band...I've got to go see someone. Later guys. *Everyone says goodbye as Davin leaves. Samantha gives Alexis a big hug. The camera follows Davin out to the loading dock. There's another figure out there smoking a cigarette. Davin rips it out of their mouth and hands them a pack of gum* DM: It causes birthmarks, if nothing else. FW: Shut up. Those cost money you know. DM: So I have something to say. FW: Ok. DM: ... FW: ... DM: ... FW: Were you going to talk now? DM: Oh yeah. FW: ... DM: ... FW: Ummm... DM: Ok fine. Here it is. If you ever, EVER do anything like that to me and my family again. Ever. And the Davin means ever. Ever do that again. There will be no words that can repair it. I can't say it more clearly than that. FW: Ok then. DM: Ok then. Also, just keep this in the back of your mind. The band. FW: The band? DM: Yeah, Eddie and David are on speaking terms again. In order to get through the whole playlist, we need Sammy and Gary too. I'm not saying we're going on tour or something, but... FW: You know, there are worse ways to spend my time.... DM: Well, just think about it. And no more cigarettes. *fade*
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Post by BookerShark on May 18, 2011 15:24:06 GMT -5
Firewoman comes back in from her smoke break...and gets her arm grabbed as she comes back in.
Fire: Whoever that is...you have three seconds to let go.
Eco: Further proof of my helpfulness. You wouldn't have given anyone three seconds in the past.
Firewoman spins around to face Eco, who lets go.
Fire: Listen--
Eco: No, you listen to ME, Lisa. Because I am SICK and TIRED of your self-righteous BULLSHIT.
Fire: My self-righteous bullshit?
Eco: Yes, yours. You have the nerve to tell me that what I'm offering El Lobo, what I'm offering Psykle--you're going to stop that, and that makes you the hero-woman? Are you FUCKING with me? You don't want me to take credit for you, fine. How the fuck is Tytan doing?
Fire: You never drugged him--
Eco: I don't know what Podvod was shooting up his arms, but no, I never drugged him. What I did for him was the same thing I was going to do for Lobo or Psykle--I MADE HIS FUCKING CAREER. What did YOU do for him, Lisa? You laid him out right next to me when you both turned on me.
Fire: Do you even REMEMBER our history?
Eco: No shit, of course I do. But that's an excuse. An excuse for a weak person. A strong person takes her enemies and changes them, builds them up into something better. You never even try. You have a decent amount of influence right now as Commissioner, Lisa--
Fire: You can call me Commissioner Firewoman--
Eco: --but all you've done, Lisa, is convince people you're so fair and good. Whoop-dee-FUCKING-doo. No one here needs a boring, useless arbiter. You've built up no proteges, taught no apprentices, mentored no rookies. Everything, and I mean EVERYTHING, is all about you.
Fire: (getting up close to Ecosystem's face.) Really, Juni? The man who awarded himself a World Championship and stuck his face on the front, you're going to accuse me of being SELFISH?
Eco: (moving in nose-to-nose) Yes. And you should be EMBARRASSED. Because I AM selfish. But even I find the time and energy to use that urge to build up others around me, to make them better. Davin Moreland and Alexander Darling are two of the most arrogant, self-absorbed pricks in this company--oh you know it's true--and yet they find the time to elevate others around them. You've done nothing of the sort.
Ecosystem backs up a few steps.
Eco: Now, I'm going to go find IQ, and we're going to talk about Psykle and how to help him achieve his goals. Maybe that will involve him being subordinate to me for a bit, and you can jeer from the sidelines. Maybe it won't, but he'll reject it anyway, and I'll have to face him as an enemy rather than an ally. But no matter how it works out, I will have TRIED.
Look, I understand you never had a real parental role model, and could never even begin to understand how to be a mother. I understand you never felt the warmth of an intact family, so you're naturally a complete failure as a wife. But honestly...you should still be ashamed of how much you've become a self-absorbed BITCH.
Firewoman's eyes flash, and she steps toward Eco with intent to swing at him, but he hops up on a crate and grabs a chain. In the style of 2004 Ecosystem, he kicks off the wall and swings up to a ledge far above Firewoman's head in the warehouse.
Eco: I'll do you the decency of not letting you end this with a fight, Lisa. This way, we can go on pretending you've become something more than the whore-child left on the streets twenty years ago.
Eco disappears behind a door.
FADE
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Post by BookerShark on May 18, 2011 15:24:47 GMT -5
*That same doorway*
Before Eco can get very far, he backs his way towards Fire and we see Alexander Darling following him and getting right in his face.
Alexander: Always playing games, aren't you Juni?
Eco: What was said between Lisa...
Alexander: Just shut the fuck up before I forget about your stupid little provocation rules and shove my fist down your fucking throat.
Eco: I'm begging you Alex...take the shot. No one will ever know that you think you're above the rules.
Alexander: You'd love that, wouldn't you? Just another person that will get themselves suspended for a month. Another person to walk away. And another title you can give yourself. You're not that lucky, Juni.
Eco: I've tried with you Alexander. I offered you the world and you came back with ridiculous demands. I asked you to step up and be the face of this company and you align yourself with dogs and whores.
We see Alexander getting closer and closer to throwing a punch...
Do it Alex. Hit me. Right here. No one's gonna stop you. Not your wife. Not my security. Take your chance to get rid of the cancer. Strike the blow that will end your so-called wars.
Alexander: *Laughing* Thin ice Eco. But you can skate on it for a little longer because after I get by Folz tomorrow...you're coming up quick on my to-do list once again. And you won't be able to run away and play GM when we're in the ring. I know your tricks. I know your games. You won't play them with me. And you won't win. You're still just a little boy trying to step up and be a man. When we get to TBA once again, I'll show the world what kind of boy and coward you are. Cause when all is said and done, I'm always going to be Alexander Darling, and you're always going to be nothing more than not.
Alex looks over to Fire and gives her a little nod saying he'll explain whatever she wants as soon as she wants.
*Fade*
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Post by BookerShark on May 18, 2011 15:25:31 GMT -5
Oh, Death, Oh Death, oh Death, Won't you spare me over til another year
<we cut in to LD Williams’ bedroom at the local hotel. Williams is sleeping as the moonlight streams in on his bed>
But what is this, that I cant see with ice cold hands taking hold of me
<The light is interrupted by a shadow.>
When God is gone and the Devil takes hold, who will have mercy on your soul
<a Hooded figure appears in the window...first gone, then back>
Oh, Death, Oh Death, oh Death, No wealth, no ruin, no silver, no gold Nothing satisfies me but your soul
<The Hooded figure walks in the window and steps into the room.>
Oh, Death, Well I am Death, none can excel, I'll open the door to heaven or hell.
<The Hooded One walks to the mantle between a sleeping LD Williams & Tytan. The Hood is shuffling a gloved hand between their papers, coming across a small bit of paper that the hood pockets>
Oh, Death, Oh Death,
<the figure of Death disappears out the window, into the night. The curtains flutter>
my name is Death and the end ïs here...
<A date comes across the screen…>
06-08-11[/i][/size]
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Post by BookerShark on May 18, 2011 15:26:12 GMT -5
*fade back in*
Fire does not see whatever it is Alex is trying to tell her because she was busy looking around and finding a random piece of rebar. Before Alex can see what she's got, she has it up and swings it. It catches Eco on the side of the neck and he crumples to the floor. She swings it a few more times hitting mostly the area of his ribs, but she does catch his temple, opening a cut that starts bleeding.
AD: Fire, STOP!
Firewoman drops the rebar and stares down at him.
FW: I told you. Don't. Touch. Me. Again.
Alexander pulls Firewoman away. She kicks Eco in the ribs as she walks past.
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Post by BookerShark on May 18, 2011 15:26:55 GMT -5
*Texpress Locker Room. Chad is on one side of the room checking his text messages while Zane and Bridgette are on the other, commiserating. There's a knock at the door, and Bridgette answers. It's Davin, Samantha and Alexis.*
DM: *gives Bridgette a big hug and kiss on the cheek* Bridgette! So nice to see you back with us.
B: Nice to be back, Davin.
*Hugs, Handshakes and kisses are exchanged as the 6 of them talk about stuff for a little bit. Hard cut to later in the day, and everyone's in a restaurant, still talking about things. Eventually, the subject turns to Alexis and Davin's IWA-MS cameo*
CM: So Alexis, what the heck ever possessed you to team with Davin anyway?
DM: Such language. You kiss your mother with that mouth?
CM: Yeah, that joke's not old or anything.
AD: I dunno, like I said before, he was suspended, I was looking to get into ring shape, he walked over and offered the olive branch. And the rest is history.
ZM: I'm be honest. I never thought I'd see you two working together again.
DM: Well, it's not like a permanent deal or anything. Just a business arrangement.
B: Yeah, well, from what Zane tells me - the last time you two "just had a business arrangement"...
SDM: Well, let's not go there yet, Bridgette. I mean, we've got these shiny "Make History, Not War" t-shirts to pay for and everything.
B: Uh-huh.
DM: Oh come on. Do you REALLY think there's anything else going on here? Alexis needed to get in the ring and I had absolutely nothing better to do because Moose is a fucking moron who got himself suspended.
CM: He's got a point, Bridge. I mean, that wasn't the most stable group of people. It sort of fell as fast as it rose. There are so many volatile personalities. I mean, Davin and Alexis. Davin and Alex. Davin and Fire. Davin and-
DM: We get it, Chadwick.
CM: Don't call me that.
*They stare each other down for a minute then start laughing hysterically. Everyone else breathes a sigh of relief.*
DM: Had you guys going there.
ZM: Ok, well, let me ask Samantha, who's been really quiet. If there's really nothing to this...why the Van Halen reference?
SDM: Hm?
ZM: Sam...
SDM: Hey, *I* didn't make the reference.
ZM: Sam...
SDM: ...
ZM: Sam?
SDM: *clears throat* David Lee Roth. Eddie Van Halen. Sammy Hagar.
DM: *looks at Chad and Zane* Michael Anthony. Alex Van Halen.
*silence at the table*
CM: So...Gary Cherone?
AD: That's probably not ideally what...Gary...would like to hear...but that's who's missing.
*More silence at the table*
DM: Besides, everyone knows that Gary had the best pure voice of any of them. He just got overshadowed by all the other personalities. That doesn't mean he's not as good or better than...say...Sammy Hagar.
SDM: Or David Lee Roth.
DM: *clears throat* Yeah. That.
*Even more silence*
B: You know, Van Halen was a hell of a band the first time around.
CM: Yeah, sure was.
ZM: Definitely.
AD: When they were on top, there was no one better.
SDM: Hell, I'd say at their peak, there's never been anyone better.
*Silence again*
DM: And truthfully, Van Halen was even more successful in their second incarnation.
SDM: *nods* Sold more records.
AD: *nods* Won more Grammys.
ZM: *nods* Sold out more shows.
CM: *nods* They were even better musicians.
*And yes, more silence*
DM: Yeah. Van Halen was awesome. Whaddya say we get out of here, have a drink or two...or, you know coffee...or Mountain Dew...or water...
*Everyone sort of agrees and gets up. Davin pulls Samantha aside*
SDM: What's up?
DM: *almost whispering* Why don't you go on ahead with them. I'll catch up in a bit.
SDM: Where are you going?
DM: I've got one more stop to make.
SDM: *smiles* Are you sure you don't want me to come with?
DM: *shakes head* Nah. I've got to do this one on my own.
SDM: *nods* Ok then, see ya in a bit?
DM: Of course, babe. *kisses her goodbye*
*fade*
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Post by BookerShark on May 18, 2011 15:27:35 GMT -5
As Firewoman and Darling continue back towards their lockerroom, they find themselves face to face with Dynamite Danny Taylor. DDT stand tall holding a piece of rebar in his hand. Darling takes a defensive stance, prepared for the worst.
Darling: Look Danny whatever you think you are doing, now is not the time. You don't want to st....
Alexander is cut off by Firewoman laying a hand on his shoulder. Danny makes no moves forward, but mearly holds out the rebar with one hand and points to Fire with his other. He slowly shakes his head no and then tosses the rebar aside. Danny taps on his chest above his heart and then makes a fist, pulling it close.
Firewoman: I know that I am stronger than that, but some wounds take time to heal.
Danny rubs the scars on his throat, nodding his head in understanding. Without warning he steps forward wrapping his arms around Firewoman in a massive hug. Fire is momentarily stunned by this, before her features soften slightly and she returns the hug. Alexander finally lowers his guard, left standing bye unsure of what to do. Danny steps back and smiles softly at Fire before nodding to Darling and walking away.
Darling: See, you have friends Fire. You don't have to handle these things alone anymore.
Firewoman: (looking at Alex and smiling) I know, thank you for staying by my side.
With that both continue on their way and the camera quick cuts back to where Ecosystem is laid out. DVD walks onto the scene and starts pulling Eco to his feet.
Eco: So where is D&D riding out to take out Firewoman for this "heinous backstage assault"?
DVD: You instigated this one yourself, you pushed the buttons, and got the reaction you where hoping for. Don't try to act like it was anything else.
Eco: So much for D&D keeping the peace, and maintaining justice.
DVD: No Justice, No Peace. Don't make the mistake of thinking we are the heroes.
Eco: No hero seems to be willing to stand up to me it seems.
DVD bursts out laughing at this.
DVD: You are not the villian, you talk a big game, but you are no real threat anymore.
Eco: (eyes narrowing) I am the World Champ and CEO. I can make your life hell if I want.
DVD: Maybe, but you won't. You need people like D&D and Lobo and Darling around to justify your importance. You wanted to talk about building people up, but you don't you just break them down into becoming monsters.
Eco: You don't know what you are talking about.
DVD: (ticking off his fingers for each person) President was goofy but harmless, until he sided with you, Firewoman was making progress with herself until you "saved her", Tytan was a hero until you pushed him into a shovel swinging madman, Vanguarde was a jerk as voltage, and a psycopath when you made him a devil. The list goes on and on.
Eco: Yet they all gained more for working with me. I make things happen. I am the person that runs this place. Don't ever forget that.
DVD: I won't, but I also no longer worry about it. Look at the history Eco: Trinity, Devils, Sanctum, Team Team, all the way back to the Establishment. You never need to be defeated, cause you always find away to defeat yourself. The only war that happens with you, is one of attrition. Wait long enough, and you will sabotage your own plans. Now you might want to head to medical, make sure your latest actions haven't left any lingering injuries.
With that DVD walks off leaving a fuming Ecosystem behind.
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Post by BookerShark on May 18, 2011 15:28:24 GMT -5
*Ecosystem gingerly walks out of the halls of the converted warehouse where tonight's show will take place. He clutches his ribs as he walks over and into the Administrative Trailer. He starts for his office but catches a glimpse of Stank sitting in his own office. Stank looks up from his paperwork as Eco passes by. Stank rises from his seat and walks out to confront Ecosystem.*
Eco - Whatever it is you are about to say I don't want to hear it.
Stank - Why am I busting my ass doing contract work for the billion and a half Sexy Female Journalists on staff when you are out actively recruiting for a new Corporate Champion?
Eco - It is you who insists you still hold the Title.
Stank - ... I do. The contract is right there in that file drawer. I have several digital copies. I even uploaded a copy for your secretary. That contract doesn't expire for another four years and you still can't fire me as long as I'm World Champion... which I might add... I am still.
Eco - You quit.
Stank - I did not quit.
Eco - We have it on tape.
Stank - We've been over this Juni.
Eco - And I tire of hearing it.
Stank - Give me my belt back and you won't hear me say it again.
Eco - Did you honestly think you could just walk back in here... into MY company and have the title handed back to you?
Stank - Yes.
Eco - Really!
Stank - Yes.
Eco - You are a vain, greedy, cruel boy.
Stank - AND YOU are an OLD MAN, and a FOOL!!
Eco - Yes… I was a fool to think you were ready.
JS - Sir…
Eco - NAY!
*Justin Sane backs down from Ecosystem's outstretched hand, retreating to Stank's office. Stank glares at Ecosystem as the CEO turns his attention back to Stank and continues.*
Eco - You are unworthy of your title, and I’ll take from you your power! In the name of my father, and his father before him, I cast you out!
Stank - FINE! But KNOW this! WHEN I beat, Sparxx, Psykle, and Lobo, I am coming after you not just for my world championship belt, I'm coming for your ASS! NOT in the GAY way either! In a way that HURTS! Though that could be gay, too... uh... I'M GOING TO KICK YOUR ASS! BEAT YOU DOWN! SMACK YOU AROUND! PUNISH YOU! Take you OUT back and shove my foot so far up your... uh... this.. my whole statement here has just flown off the rails, hasn't it?
Eco - I would say so, yes.
Stank - You know what I'm trying to get at.
Eco - My ass?
Stank - Shut up.
Fade
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Post by BookerShark on May 18, 2011 15:29:11 GMT -5
Firewoman is STANDING~! impatiently with Lucky
L: Okay, so Dr. Freedman has agreed to fly to Africa to swear to the board that Eco's actions had a triggering effect on your PTSD and--
FW: Lucky, enough. I didn't attack him because of any disorder that sounds like you pulled your spoon out of alphabet soup....
L: It's a very real thing, Fire, and if you'd just stick with therapy and --
FW: I attacked him because it felt damn good to do it, and if I get fined and suspended so be it, it was worth it. Also, it wasn't nearly enough. Now we going to do this thing here?
The OOWF banner drops behind her.
L: Okay, I just think that in THIS case--
Firewoman grabs the microphone away from him.
FW: Folks, I'm here with perennial runner-up in NPC of the Year, Eugenio "Lucky" Gutierrez, who is SUPPOSED to be doing his job as valet/interviewer.
L: Looking out for you best interests is--
FW: Lucky, what do you think is the key to Firewoman winning tonight's match?
L: .....
FW: ....
L: Fine. The key is Firewoman keeping her focus and not letting her backstage and family issues cloud her--
FW: Wait...what family issues? Davin is talking to me again.
L: You're still mad at Alex.
FW: It's a day that ends in a "Y" Lucky, I'm always mad at someone. If he wants to tell me why that pop tart is messaging him, I'm all ears. Otherwise, it's his turn.
L: Well, you've barely trained, you've been either working in the office or sick or--
FW: No ideas for what the match up of former protege with his former mentor means to either of them?
L: *sigh*...well, uh...I think Fire is underestimating him, but still I think her skill and experience will win out if she can keep her mind in the ring.
FW: Huh. Gee, thanks.
The Banner goes away as Firewoman shoves the microphone back into Lucky's hands and storms off.
L: What? You asked!!
FW: *From off-screen* You're fired.
L: What? No I'm not....
*pause*
FW: *still from off-screen* Okay, you're not...help me get Opus's pool set up.
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Post by BookerShark on May 18, 2011 15:29:46 GMT -5
Chris Evans is show standing in front of the OOWF banner.
Evans: It seems that Firewoman hasn’t even mentioned me this week. Like I’m not even worth mentioning. Let me remind you people that I hold a clean victory over a 2-time OOWF World Champion Stank. And speaking of Stank, I’d like to go on record and say that the big guy is the only one in this company aside from my stable-mates that I have even the slightest bit of respect for in this company.
And it goes without saying that the man got royally fucked over by Ecosystem. And I’d like to let Stank know that if he ever needs a hand in getting him back, the invitation is out there. Not like he really needs it though. Either way, I’ll put in a word for Bryce to send you a fruit basket, and this time, I’ll make sure it doesn’t have any racist undertones to it.
With that being said, back to more pressing matters, namely Firewoman. Like the fact that I’ve made her husband my personal bitchboy the last few times that we’ve hooked up in the ring, and who will fall to Matt Folz tonight. And the last time that I faced her, I pinned her clean as well.
And what gets her attention instead? Is it the brightest young star in this business today? No no no. What DOES get her attention...is a penguin. A fucking penguin. Let me remind you of something, Lisa. I am the future of this company! Not some disease-riddled bird, ME!
I am the one who made a name for myself, at your expense might I remind you. When I turned away from you, dropped you with the Icarus Wings and left you facedown in a pool of your own blood. And I intend to do it again in the ring tonight. Just try to give me a decent showing, cause I actually wanna try breaking a sweat this time around.
*fade to black*
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Post by BookerShark on May 18, 2011 15:31:48 GMT -5
*The OOWF-TV feed goes dark, and it's replaced by the graphic "OOWF -TV Special Report". We hear voiceover guy*
VG: The following is an OOWF-TV Special Report. Reporting for OOWF-TV, Davin Moreland.
*The scene fades in to Davin Moreland's locker room, who is wearing a New England Patriots #11 jersey*
DM: Ladies and Gentlemen, this news is just breaking now...Super Bowl Champion and 4-time Pro Bowler Drew Bledsoe has just been overwhelmingly elected to the New England Patriots Hall of Fame. Bledsoe was the #1 Overall Pick of the 1993 NFL Draft at just 20 years old.
DM: When Bledsoe was drafted, the New England Patriots franchise had already signed an agreement to move to St. Louis. However, thanks to his play, the Patriots' local fanbase rebounded and laid the groundwork for the tradition of winning they have today.
DM: In 1994, Bledsoe finished 2nd in the MVP voting as just a 2nd year player. This was highlighted by a 26-20 overtime win over Minnesota where Bledsoe attempted 70 passes, completing 45 of them in a comeback win where the Patriots trailed 20-3 in the 4th quarter. Those 70 pass attempts are still an NFL single-game record.
DM: In 1996, Bledsoe led the Patriots to an 11-5 record and a Super Bowl appearance where he was undermined by the egomaniacal Head Coach Bill Parcells, who had already accepted a position with the dirty, dirty New York Jets that week. He thought it was a good idea to have Right Tackle Max Lane, to whom "journeyman" would be a complimentary description, single-block Hall of Famer and arguably the best 4-3 Defensive End of All-Time, Reggie White. Thanks to that and the inability of the Special teams to cover a fucking kickoff, the Patriots lost that day. But Drew Bledsoe cemented his place in Patriots history forever.
DM: In 2001, Bledsoe nearly died after he suffered a sheared blood vessel in his lung thanks to a Mo Lewis (Dirty Jet) hit. This ushered in the era of cult hero, Justin Bieber look-alike and notorious Diva Tom Brady. Bledsoe had lost his job by the time he was ready to return from injury, despite Brady averaging like 114 yds/game over that stretch. In the AFC Championship Game that season, the Dirty, Cheating Steelers dove at Brady's legs well after he releases the football, spraining his ankle. Heroically, Bledsoe took over on that drive, completing 3 of 3 passes for 54 yards, a touchdown, and a 6-yard scramble that looked eerily like the hit he suffered earlier in the year.
DM: Due to politics and Bill Belichick being a stubborn asshole, Brady started that Super Bowl where the Overrated Rams (from St. Louis, ironically) got beat the fuck down. The newly-minted tradition of the Patriots started that day - and we can thank that, as well as the transition from joke to champion, to the efforts, play and balls of one man, Drew Bledsoe.
DM: After that season, Bledsoe went away and did stuff. Details are hazy.
DM: So here (points to his jersey front and back) is to you Drew Bledsoe. When you left, you had shattered every record for a QB in Patriots history. You set the new standard for winning in Foxboro. And thanks to you, the Patriots play in Foxboro to this day, and we're not Dirty, Dirty Jets fans.
DM: Thank you Drew Bledsoe. A more deserving Patriots Hall of Famer we may never see. The memories you gave us will last a lifetime. We now return you to your regular programming.
*Davin turns around, showing the "Bledsoe" side of the jersey and the screen fades*
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Post by BookerShark on May 18, 2011 16:39:58 GMT -5
COLD OPEN
SFJ66: “Good afternoon, everybody. Today on this OOWF Minute my guest is current OOWF Intercontinental Champion, The Crusher Stan Fulton.”
Camera angle pulls back to show Fulton standing next to the SFJ.
SFJ66: “Crusher, tonight, here in Nacala, Mozambique (lame cheap pop) you face DH Magnusson again. However, this time your IC title is not on the line.”
SF: “That’s right, Trish.”
SFJ66: “My name’s Krista.”
SF: “Whatever.”
SFJ66: “Do you have any problem with facing DH two weeks in a row?”
SF: “Not really, Lissa. I wrestle whom I’m told to. Last week I beat Maggs 1-2-3, this week I’ll do it again.”
SFJ66: “How about this New War that everyone’s talking about?”
SF: “There is no war, Pricilla. Moose wants to work with people he trusts. D&D wants to make a name for themselves by being all righteous and Crete-like. Eco wants to play Napoleon. Makes no difference to me. I just want to hurt my opponent and pick up a paycheck.”
SFJ66: “You sound like Matt Folz.”
SF: “No, Matt will hurt anyone and anything for a buck. And he’ll do it inside and outside the ring. I’m willing to settle for inside the ol’ squared circle. And I won’t go around hurting those that can advance my career.”
SFJ66: “You mean...?”
SF: “Exactly what I said. If a person can help me become more famous and richer, I’m there. Now, Alexander Darling and Victor Dinero will claim I’m waffling again or switching my outlook, but this is the same as it’s always been. I mean to be famous and have the respect that multiple title runs offers. Not to mention loads of cash. That last one’s important. Lots of greenbacks. Dough. Folding stuff. Dead Presidents.”
SFJ66: “You want money.”
SF: “You’re quick on the uptake there, Missy. So this week it’s DH Magnusson. The Midnight Son. Well, son? The ol’ clock is about to strike midnight. And so will I. Repeatedly.
“Enjoy the pain.”
Fulton walks off.
SFJ66: “That’s it for this OOWF Minute. Good afternoon.”
FADE
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Post by BookerShark on May 18, 2011 16:40:52 GMT -5
Evans turns around and sees Fire still standing there.
C"L"E: Fire.
FW: Cubbie.
C"L"E: Don't --
Before he can finish what was probably going to be "call me that," Fire has hit him with an amazing Christian-esque bitchslap that spins him about one and a half times. His back is now to her and he sees Davin Moreland standing there.
DM: Going somewhere?
Davin stands in his way long enough for Fire to get him in a hammerlock and push him against the wall.
FW: Trust me, Cubbie. I remember. But you're the one who seems to have forgotten something.
C"L"E: Oh yeah? What's that *his voice muffled by wall*
FW: Your place.
Fire pulls him away from the wall and shoves him down the hall. She and Davin look at each other.
FW: Thanks, Dave.
DM: No problem, Sammy.
Fire pulls out a cigarette and lights up. Davin promptly pulls it out of her mouth and drops it on the floor extinguishing it. The two glare and then walk opposite directions down the hall.
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