OOWF MADNESS 8
Live! From Bucksnort, Alabama
MOOSEHEAD JACK vs. COMRADE SHARKOFF –Steel Cage DDT Iron Man Heavy Metal Title MatchSharkoff is out first and the crowd boos him loudly. Moose is announced next, and he gets booed even louder. Moose steps into the cage and lays the DDT Iron Man Heavy Metal title on the mat and dares Sharkoff to pick it up. Sharkoff snarls and kicks the title, then charges in and BLASTS Moose with a forearm to the jaw, sending him reeling back into the corner. The referee picks up the DDT title and hangs it on the ropes, the title is a legal weapon during the match.
Sharkoff charges in and connects with a knee to Moose’s gut, then hammers him with punches to the face. Sharkoff pulls Moose out of the corner and blasts him on the bridge of the nose with an elbow, dropping Moose to his knees. Sharkoff drags Moose to the cage and slams him face first into the steel between the middle and top rope. Sharkoff holds Moose’s head on the steel and repeatedly kicks the back of his head opening a gash on Moose’s head that is quickly pouring blood.
Sharkoff pulls Moose off the steel and sends him to the ropes and connects on the rebound with a big boot to the face. As Moose staggers, Sharkoff hits the ropes and catches Moose with a RUSSIAN SICKLE! Moose drops to the mat, stunned, but Sharkoff doesn’t even try for a ten count. Instead, he grabs the DDT Title and waits for Moose to get to this feet, then charges in and BLASTS him upside the head with it. Moose stumbles to the ropes, bounces hard on them and falls to the mat, dazed. The referee starts a ten count, but Moose pulls himself up at seven.
Sharkoff charges in again but Moose POPS him with a straight right cross to the jaw. Moose cocks his head, once again appearing to listen to Him. He grabs the DDT title and SLAMS Sharkoff in the face with it. Moose is in a rage. He backs Sharkoff into the corner and HAMMERS him with punches to the face, then BITES him above the eye trying to draw blood. When that doesn’t work, he grabs Sharkoff by the head and throws him into the cage. On the rebound he bounces off the ropes and nails Sharkoff with a BUISAKU KNEE to the face. Moose pins Sharkoff on the mat and begins HAMMERING him with elbows to the face. The referee looks like he might step into stop it, but Sharkoff reaches up and rakes Moose’s eyes.
As Moose grabs he face, Sharkoff gets to his feet, puts the DDT title on the mat and lifts Moose onto his shoulders and DRIVES him to the mat with a DEATH VALLEY DRIVER right onto the title. Sharkoff pounces on Moose and traps him in the BONEYARD! Moose howls in pain and the referee is right there to see if Moose will quit, but he refuses. Finally after several agonizing minutes, Sharkoff releases the hold, pulls Moose up and dumps on the back of his head with a belly to back suplex. Sharkoff heads the corner and climbs the ropes. He leaps and drops a FLYING KNEE across Moose’s chest. Moose spits up a little blood and rolls in agony on the mat. Sharkoff heads to the top rope and lands a SECOND flying knee, then a third. Moose is gasping for air and not moving much. Sharkoff backs off and tells the referee to stops the match. He starts a ten count, but Moose gets to the ropes and pulls himself up at nine.
Sharkoff grabs Moose, but Moose reaches into his shorts and pulls out a small piece of barbed wire and wraps it around his fist. He turns and BLASTS Sharkoff in the face with it! Sharkoff staggers backward into the corner, and it looks like the shot might have caught his EYE! Sharkoff falls to his knees in pain, the referee moves in to check on his eye, which is pouring blood and swollen badly already. Moose shoves the referee aside and hammers the top of Sharkoff’s head with barbed wire punches, opening several nasty gashes. Sharkoff is suddenly in a very bad way, gushing blood and dazed. Moose pulls him out of the corner, to the middle of the ring and sets him up and hits a PILEDRIVER on the title!
Moose doesn’t even let the referee try a ten count. He pulls Sharkoff to his feet and connects with several punches to Sharkoff’s damaged eye. Sharkoff staggers around the ring blinded, and Moose toys with him, peppering him with punches to the face. Moose hits a CHIMERA PLEX just to dump Sharkoff on the back of his head three times. Moose stands over Sharkoff and glares at him, the crowd boos Moose loudly. We hear Moose say “He wants it, so this is how it will be.” As he says this, he pulls Sharkoff to his feet and lifts Sharkoff and hits the GO TO SLEEP FOREVER! Moose’s knee SLAMS into the back of Sharkoff’s head, and Sharkoff appears to be nearly unconscious. Moose pounces on him and locks him in the ANACONDA CROSS. Blood spurts from the open wounds on the top of Sharkoff’s head, catching the referee right in the face. The referee decides that Sharkoff is out and cannot continue, so he calls for the bell ending the match.
WINNER via referee stoppage in 19:18 – Moosehead Jack
A bloody and battered Moose releases the hold, struggles to his feet, blood dripping from his face. He grabs the DDT title and walks to the camera. Still gasping for air from the effect of the knees, and occasionally stopping to spit out blood, Moose points to his taped fist that has “LQD” written on it and speaks.
It’s coming. I promise you. And Stank……..you saw what just happened to Sharkoff. You want to save me? Bring it. Decisions have consequences Stank……don’t piss Him off.”With that Moose staggers out of the cage and up the ramp to a chorus of boos while medics look at Sharkoff in the middle of the ring.
GHOSTHEAD vs. MYSTERY OPPONENTMy Ruin blares over the speaker heralding the arrival of the Ghosthead killer. The crowd reigns down boos, but he seems to not notice. He also doesn't notice his masked mystery opponent popping out from behind some nearby equipment containers. The masked man grabs Ghosthead and starts laying into him with wicked knife edge chops. He then attempts to whip Ghosthead into the barricades, but Ghosthead reverses sending the masked man crashing hard. Ghosthead charges in, but his opponent drops him face first onto the barricade with a drop toe hold. As a woozy Ghosthead regains his footing, his masked opponent hops onto the barricade, and in an impressive display of balance, runs the barricade before leaping off and nailing a flying hurricanrana to Ghosthead. The masked man grabs Ghosthead by his dreads, and tosses him into the ring. He stands on the apron waiting for Ghosthead to regain his feet before springboarding in. Unfortunately for the masked man Ghosthead had regained his wits, and counters with a dropkick. Both men are down, but finally in the ring, so the Ref calls for the bell starting the match, then immediately starts a ten count.
The ref makes it to five before Ghosthead is back on his feet. He notices his masked opponent pulling himself up in the corner, and charges in nailing a running knee. Ghosthead follows up with a running bulldog. He covers, but only gets a one. Ghosthead pulls his mystery opponent up, and nails a combo of strikes and kicks before attempting a spinning back fist. His opponent ducks the last strike, and leaps onto his back spinning into a victory roll, that also only gets one before Ghosthead kicks out. Both men are back up, and Ghosthead begins to circle his masked opponent, more wary of him now. The two lock up and begin a series of hold/counterhold chain wrestling moves that lasts for several minutes and ends with both men kipping up simultaneously. The crowd begins to do the indy clap of respect, when it's cut off by Ghosthead releasing the black mist! His opponent saw it coming, and drops back in a very matrixesq dodge. The ref begins to call for the DQ, when the masked man runs over and stops him. Ghosthead attempts to take advantage of this, and grabs his opponent from behind nailing a release German suplex. He covers, but the mystery man kicks out at two.
Ghosthead lays in some stomps on his masked opponent, before lifting him up, and attempting to pull off a Horror Driver on him. His opponent blocks and back body drops Ghosthead to the mat. As Ghosthead gets to his feet, the masked man nails a dropsault that sends him chest first into the turnbuckle. Ghosthead stumbles backwards out of the corner, and the mystery man grabs the back of his head dropping him hard to the mat. He covers, but Ghosthead is able to kick out at two. What follows next is a strike lovers dream, as both men begin unloading with chops, punches and kicks, neither seeming to get an advantage over the other, and with the ref threatening to DQ both of them. This ends when Ghosthead runs the top rope and nails the Eidolon sending his masked opponent down. Ghosthead picks the masked man up attempting a vertical suplex, but his opponent wiggles out. Ghosthead however refuses to release his grip on the mask, and as his opponent pulls away, it rips the mask off, revealing ~another mask~! However, this mask is a familiar one, as its Rabbit Mask!
The crowd erupts in cheers, and Ghosthead is momentarily surprised by this revelation. That moment’s hesitation is all Rabbit needs, and he nails a gut kick, followed by a massive Brainbusta that puts Ghosthead on the mat. Rabbit Mask quickly hops to the top turnbuckle, and in one fluid motion, nails the BUNNY BOMB!. He covers, and the ref counts the three.
WINNER via pin fall in 23:13 Rabbit Mask
Ghosthead rolls out of the ring clutching at his stomach, as Rabbit Mask hops onto the turnbuckle soaking in the cheers of the crowd. Ghosthead locks eyes with Rabbit Mask, who makes the motion for him to bring it, but Ghosthead instead chooses to slowly back up the ramp to where his wife Shannon is waiting. His eyes never breaking contact with Rabbits. Rabbit does not break the contact either, until his wife Usagi no tsuma enters the ring. Rabbit and her embrace drawing more cheers from the crowd, as Shannon and Ghosthead disappear into the back.
PHOENIX RISING vs. TEXPRESSPhoenix Rising makes their way to the ring first. They clearly enjoy the rousing ovation they receive, but it’s evident from their expressions that they are very focused on the task at hand. They climb into the ring and Alexander Darling stretches in the corner while Firewoman runs the ropes to warm up. The crowd is already cheering, but they come absolutely unglued when the Texpress step onto the stage. Chad Madison and Zane Myers pause for a moment to acknowledge the reaction and then continue down the aisle. They climb into the ring and pose on the turnbuckles, and then face off with their opponents. Handshakes are exchanged - with a slight hesitation between Chad and Alex. Referee Angelo Barros calls for the bell, and we‘re underway.
Chad and Fire start out for their teams. They lock up and Chad snaps off an arm drag. Fire rolls to her feet and sidesteps a dropkick, and then drops an elbow into the back of his head. She plants a knee in his back, but before she can hook him he rolls away. Fire is up and throws a kick. Chad dodges it and catches her leg. Fire drives her free foot into his stomach and then swings it up to kick him in the face. Chad staggers back and Fire rolls to her feet and shoves him into the ropes. She sends Chad across the ring and catches him with a punch to the stomach that flips him to the mat. Fire goes to the ropes and hits a baseball slide dropkick. She makes a quick cover, but only gets one.
Fire is up first and catches Chad with a European uppercut, followed by an elbow to the nose. She sends him into the Phoenix Rising corner and follows him in. She hits Chad with a knee to the stomach and in one flowing motion, pivots to hook Chad’s head with one arm while reaching behind her with the other to make the tag. She continues the motion into a bulldog and rolls out of the way as Alex slings himself over the ropes and drives a knee into Chad’s head. He hooks the leg, and again Chad kicks out at one.
Alex hauls Chad to his feet and backs him against the ropes, working him over with chops. He hits an Irish whip and levels Chad with a clothesline. He stomps away, and then pulls Chad up and snaps him over with a suplex. Alex makes another cover, but Chad rolls a shoulder in time. Alex drags Chad up and sends him to the ropes, and Chad springs off the second rope into a back elbow. Alex ducks it and Chad crashes to the canvas. Alex waits for him to get up and throws a kick. Chad drops to the mat to avoid it and tries a leg sweep, but Alex hops over it. This leaves Alex off balance and Chad rolls to his feet and hits a standing dropkick. Chad dives to his corner and makes the tag.
Zane storms across the ring and levels Alex with a clothesline. He scoops him up and slams him to the mat, and follows up with a leaping leg drop. He hauls Alex up and stuns him with a pair of European uppercuts. He drives a knee into Alex’s stomach and hauls him over with a gut wrench suplex. He sits Alex up and plants a knee in his back, hauling back on his arms. Alex manages to get his feet under him and stand up, forcing Zane to remove his knee. Alex breaks one arm free, but before he can follow up Zane hauls him forward into a short arm clothesline. Zane keeps his grip on the arm and hauls Alex back to his feet. Zane winds the arm and twists it into a flying hammerlock. Alex swings his legs back and wraps them around Zane to reduce the pressure on his arm, but Zane maintains the hammerlock with one hand, grabs Alex’s head with the other, and kills him with a sit-out face slam. Zane rolls him over and covers, but Alex kicks out at two.
Zane is up first and stuns Alex with a knee lift. He buries a knee in his midsection and tries to lift him for the border toss, but Alex drops to his knees to block. Zane hits several forearms to the back and tries to pull him up again, but Alex yanks him off his feet. Alex tries to turn it into the Darling Moneyclip, but Zane kicks him away. Zane rolls to one knee and waits for Alex to approach, and then explodes off the mat with a lariat. Alex ducks at the last second and hooks Zane around the waist, driving him to the mat with a German suplex. He bridges, but Zane rolls a shoulder at two.
Alex grabs Zane as he gets up and sends him to the corner. Alex follows a step behind him and runs into an elbow when Zane suddenly puts on the brakes. Alex staggers back, and Zane levels him with a discuss punch. He hauls Alex onto his shoulder and drives him to the mat with a running power slam, rolling through and reaching out to make the tag to Chad. Chad springs to the top rope and hits a frogsplash. He covers, but Fire is in to break it up at two. While Barros forces her back to her corner, Chad pulls Alex up, shoves him against the turnbuckles, and makes the tag to Zane.
The Texpress each wind an arm, duck under, and lift Alex onto the top turnbuckle. They climb up as well and set up a superplex. Fire starts into the ring to help out, but Barros cuts her off. Texpress hit the move and Chad rolls out to the apron while Zane floats over. He hooks the leg, but Alex manages to kick out. Zane pulls Alex up and pummels him with forearms. He winds Alex’s arm and sends him to the ropes. Zane lifts him for a spine buster, but Alex hooks his head and reverses into a DDT. Alex rolls over and crawls for his corner, where Fire is bouncing on the apron and reaching out for the tag. Alex is almost there and lunges the final distance, but Zane grabs his ankle and drags him back. Alex tries for the enzugiri, but Zane ducks and catches the leg. He plants Alex with a wheelbarrow suplex. Zane grabs the leg again and drags Alex to the Texpress corner to make the tag.
Texpress each grab a leg and make a wish. Chad glances at Fire and tries to look apologetic, but fails - badly. Chad bundles Alex into the corner and springs off the second rope to dropkick him in the face. He makes the tag to Zane, who lifts Alex onto his shoulders as Chad climbs to the top - Dropkick Device! Zane makes the cover and Chad rolls to his feet - and Fire slams into him with a flying forearm that knocks him backwards onto his partner and breaks the pin. Fire slings Chad to the ropes and follows a step behind him, hitting a flying knee that knocks him through the ropes. Fire turns and hits the rising Zane with a neck breaker. Chad springs to the top rope and into a leg drop, but Fire moves and Chad hits his own partner. At this point Barros steps in and forces Fire back to her corner, while Chad rolls out to the apron as well.
Barros starts counting both Zane and Alex down. At five Zane starts to get up. He grabs Alex, who drives a shoulder into his midsection. Alex lunges to his feet, lifting Zane up, and hits him with an atomic drop. Alex goes to the ropes and drops Zane with a clothesline. That’s all the energy he has, and he stumbles toward his corner. He reaches out as he falls forward - and he makes the tag!
Fire leaps to the top rope and launches herself at Zane, taking him down with a flying head scissors. She hits the ropes behind him and flips over him as he sits up, snapping his neck a la Mr. Perfect. She grabs Zane’s arm and drags him onto his stomach. She grabs his other arm - Firestomp! Chad starts into the ring as Fire climbs to the top rope. She sees him coming and modifies her Firesault attempt into a dropkick to take Chad off his feet. Barros steps in and sends Chad out of the ring, but the distraction is enough for Zane to get unsteadily to his feet. Fire attacks him with chops and knocks him into the ropes. When she tries an Irish whip, Zane reverses it and hauls her into a spine buster. He follows up with a cover, but Alex is in to break it up at two.
Fire and Zane are both slow to get up. Fire ducks a swing and delivers a kick to the knee. Zane stumbles, and she springs off the second rope to drive a knee into his head. Zane is off balance, and Fire sends him into the Phoenix Rising Corner. Zane hits the turnbuckles and explodes out, running through Fire with a clothesline. He stoops to pick her up, and she grabs his head and drops, driving his jaw into her shoulder. Fire turns and lunges for her corner, making the tag. Zane crawls to his corner as well. Alex is in and grabs his leg, but Zane is too close and makes the tag to Chad.
Chad vaults the ropes and throws a super kick that catches Alex on the jaw. He grabs Alex’s arm before he falls and slings him to the ropes. Alex reverses and plants Chad with a belly-to-belly suplex. He covers, but Zane is in to break it up. This brings Fire in as well, and we have a four-way brawl. The Texans get Phoenix Rising in opposite corners and send them across the ring. Fire and Alex link arms and Alex sends Fire into Chad with a flying forearm. Zane runs across the ring and runs right into a super kick from Alex. Zane falls back against the ropes and Fire joins her husband in a double dropkick that sends Zane out to the floor. Fire grabs Chad and pulls his arm across his throat. Alex takes over - Darling Driver! Alex covers, as Fire dives through the ropes onto Zane. Barros counts One…Two…Three.
WINNERS, in 27:09, Phoenix Rising.
After the match, Fire gets slowly to her feet and offers Zane a hand up. They rejoin their partners in the ring and after a momentary staredown handshakes are exchanged again. The Texpress raise Phoenix Rising’s arms to the delight of the crowd.
MAI MUYO vs. EL LOBO SANGRIENTO“Joker and the Thief” plays first, signaling the arrival of the massive Bloody Wolf, El Lobo Sangriento. He walks down the aisle, slapping hands with the fans before entering the ring, stepping over the ropes as he comes in. Mai Muyo comes out second, accompanied by Matt Folz for extra crowd-booing impetus. We see a dark eye makeup as the cameras zoom. She walks down, reaching out to slap fans’ hands as though nothing has changed. She bounds up to the ring and looks El Lobo up and down. Mai smiles, fist-bumps Folz, and leaps over the ropes to come into the ring. The referee rings the bell, and the match is on.
Mai quickly swings to the side avoiding a lockup, grabbing Lobo’s right hand…and shaking it vigorously, releasing it and smiling. Lobo cocks his head to the side, confused, but he goes for another lockup. Mai tucks her arm under his, using momentum on top of her 200-pound frame to throw the big man with an armdrag. She leaps on his back, appearing to attempt a Tazmission of the Matt Folz variety. Lobo is shocked at first, but snapmares Mai off quickly. Lobo goes for a clubbing blow to Mai’s back, but Muyo rolls out of the ring. Lobo slides out and follows, but Mai goes under the apron. Folz jaws with Lobo for a second, as Mai comes back out from under the apron and chopblocks Lobo, taking him down to one knee. Mai leaps up to the guardrail and comes off with a Beautiful Disaster Kick, knocking Lobo flat. (Now she’s just ripping off Cody’s whole moveset.) Mai slides back into the ring and encourages the referee to start the countout. He does, but Lobo gets to his feet at four. Mai bounds off the opposite ropes to attempt a baseball slide, but Lobo shifts right quickly and pulls himself up and into the ring, forcing Mai to follow him back in.
Lobo whips Mai into the ropes, aiming for a huge clothesline. Mai ducks, bounds off the opposite ropes, attempts a crossbody—but she is caught by El Lobo Sangriento, who drops her with a POWERSLAM! He hooks the leg, good for a two-count. As Mai gets the shoulder up, she begins to tweak the fingers of El Lobo for some joint manipulation, causing him to cry out and try to pull away. She releases, but kicks him hard in the hand, making the big man step back. She hops off the second rope, this time with a spinning crossbody attempt, but Lobo ducks under and Mai is forced to awkwardly land on her arm and knee. Lobo charges with a running knee to Mai’s gut, sending her halfway across the ring.
As Mai stands up by the turnbuckles, Lobo charges forward. Mai swings out of the way at the last second, causing Lobo to run chest first into the turnbuckles. Mai hops up on the second rope, and pulls Lobo back into a Dragon Sleeper. She steps back, spins for the END-IS-HERE…but Lobo reaches out and grabs the rope, breaking Mai’s twist and causing her to propel herself hard against the mat. Lobo bounds off the ropes toward the stunned Mai, but Mai quickly recovers and gets a Ravenna-style Superkick off on Lobo! Unfortunately, the large Lobo gets knocked back into the referee. REF BUMP! The referee flops down to the ground, as does Lobo, though the Bloody Wolf seems mostly dazed, as the kick didn’t catch him between the eyes. Matt Folz jumps up on the apron and calls over to Mai. She turns her head, and he throws her a pair of brass knuckles. Mai slips them on her hand, hesitates as Lobo rises…and then throws them back to Folz. Mai and Folz have a quick argument, as Mai turns around right into a clothesline~! by El Lobo Sangriento! Folz drops off the apron, clearly frustrated. Lobo scoops the surprised Muyo for a swift LA BALA DE PLATA! Lobo goes for the cover, pressing his 320-pound frame down hard: 1-2-3! Mai tried to swing a leg onto the ropes, but the hand came down before its arrival.
WINNER in 9:09…El Lobo Sangriento!
Lobo celebrates in ring as Mai rolls out to Matt Folz, who is clearly frustrated that Mai refused assistance. They walk to the back arguing as Lobo soaks in the adulation.
DANY TAYLOR vs. CHRIS EVANSEvans attacks Taylor to start, and the match dissolves from there. Taylor fights back and the match spills out of the ring and they brawl all over the arena. The New Guard, and the Old Guard both get involved, and after nearly fifteen minutes of out of control action, the referee decides they ain’t coming back to the ring and throws the match out.
WINNER – No Contest in 15:46
CROWING vs. JP SPARXX – OOWF Onslaught Championship Match 2/3 FallsJP Sparxx is out first, accompanied by Jewel. His usual swagger is in full effect, but when the camera focuses on his eyes you can see the intensity radiating from them. This man wants the Onslaught Championship back. Sparxx and Jewel pose in the ring to a chorus of boos, and then Sparxx runs the ropes to warm up. He stops and glares up the aisle as the OOWF Onslaught Champion, Crowing, steps onto the stage. Crowing stops and acknowledges the cheers, and then makes his way down the aisle. He slides into the ring and holds his championship high, and then hands it to referee Junior Hale. Junior displays the title to the crowd, and then calls the combatants to the middle of the ring. Tonight’s match will be held under Onslaught rules, but given that it’s two-of-three falls with a one hour time limit, we can expect Junior to be a little lenient in enforcing them. He gives them their instructions, sends them to their corners, and calls for the bell.
They circle and lock up. Sparxx snaps off an arm drag. Crowing rolls to his feet and Sparxx tries another one, but Crowing blocks, driving Sparxx’s back down across his knee. Sparxx rolls away and Crowing throws a kick as he gets up. Sparxx narrowly dodges it, but it leaves him off balance and Crowing sends him across the ring. Crowing ducks the first pass and tries to leapfrog the second, but Sparxx catches him with an “accidental” low blow. Crowing crashes to the mat and Sparxx pounces, hammering him with a series of kicks to the ribs before driving a knee into his face. Crowing rolls away from the onslaught, and Sparxx goes to the ropes and delivers a baseball slide dropkick to the back of his head. This knocks Crowing under the ropes to the apron, and he drops off to the floor.
Surprisingly, Sparxx doesn’t waste any time playing to the crowd. He hops over the ropes, gets a running start on the apron, and delivers a brutal double axe handle to the back of Crowing’s head as he tries to get up. Sparxx grabs Crowing and slings him into the ringside barrier, following up with a dropkick that almost knocks him into the crowd. Sparxx checks the count and drops Crowing with a running knee lift before sliding back in for the break. Crowing stumbles toward the ring and Sparxx gets a running start. He dives through the ropes - and Crowing sidesteps at the last second, sending Sparxx crashing into the railing. Crowing grabs Sparxx, shoves him into the ring and climbs onto the apron. He slingshots himself over the ropes and drops an elbow into Sparxx’s back. He rolls Sparxx over and makes a quick cover, but only gets two.
Crowing pulls Sparxx up and drives a series of knees into his face. He stands him up with a European uppercut and shoves him back into the corner. Crowing works Sparxx over with chops and transitions into kicks, pummeling him until Junior orders him to get Sparxx out of the corner.
Crowing has received his first warningCrowing obliges, sending Sparxx across the ring and following him in with a high knee. Sparxx stumbles out of the corner, and Crowing drops him with a bulldog. He rolls Sparxx over and covers, but again only gets two. Crowing drags Sparxx to his feet and snaps him over with a suplex. He grabs Sparxx‘s legs, looking for the D-Tuner, but Sparxx kicks him off. Sparxx rolls to his feet, and Crowing grabs him for a belly-to-belly suplex. As he lifts him, Sparxx slams his arms across the champion’s ears. Crowing lets go, and Sparxx shoves him back and pegs him with a super kick. Sparxx falls back and rolls out of the ring, trying to clear his head.
Crowing sprints towards the ropes and puts on the brakes at the last second, but not before Sparxx dives out of the way. Crowing chuckles as Sparxx gets to his feet, cursing. Jewel has some words for Crowing as well, as she circles the ring to console her man. Junior’s count reaches seven, and Sparxx heads back to the ring. Crowing meets him at the ropes, and Sparxx grabs his head and drops, clotheslining him on the top rope. Sparxx slides back into the ring to beat the count. He stomps on Crowing, and then springs off the second rope with a 360 leg drop. He pulls Crowing to his feet and buries a knee in his midsection, and then drops him with a DDT He makes a cover, but Crowing is out at one.
Sparxx sits Crowing up and kicks him in the back. He goes to the ropes and hits him with a diving clothesline. Sparxx rolls back to his feet and continues on to the ropes, hitting Crowing with a baseball slide dropkick. He kicks Crowing under the ropes to the apron and pulls him to his feet. He hauls Crowing over the top rope into the ring and hits a rope assisted DDT. He rolls Crowing over and hooks the leg. Junior slides into place, and Sparxx braces his feet on the ropes out of his sight as he counts One…Two…Three.
WINNER of the first fall, in 19:03, J.P. Sparxx.Jewel hops onto the apron and hugs JP as Junior checks on Crowing. Sparxx detaches himself and moves back in. He drops an elbow on Crowing and Covers, but Crowing kicks out at two. JP rolls to his feet and stomps him, and then comes off the ropes with springboard moonsault. He covers again, and this time he gets two-and-a-half. Sparxx pulls Crowing up into a front facelock and drags him into the corner. He climbs to the second rope and goes for a tornado DDT, but Crowing reverses it and drives him to the mat. It takes everything he has, however, so he’s unable to follow up and JP makes it to his feet first.
Sparxx waits for Crowing to get up. He gets a running start and hits a spinning neck breaker. Sparxx runs up the ropes and hits a moonsault. He hooks the leg, but Crowing gets a foot on the ropes at two.
Crowing has used his first Rope BreakSparxx is starting to get frustrated, and slams the back of Crowing’s head repeatedly into the mat. He drags Crowing to his feet and slings him into the corner. He follows him in, but Crowing darts out of the way. Sparxx manages to stop himself before he hits the turnbuckles, but Crowing swings up behind him and rolls him up for a long two count.
Sparxx blasts Crowing with a kick to the face before he can get to his feet. He drapes Crowing’s neck across the ropes and plants a knee in his back until Junior forces him to break.
JP Sparxx has received his first warningSparxx pulls Crowing up and sends him to the ropes. Crowing reverses and snaps Sparxx over with a power slam. He hooks the leg, but only gets one. Both men are up and Sparxx throws a kick. Crowing ducks it and drives a shoulder into Sparxx’s midsection. Sparxx manages to flip over it and hit a sunset flip. Crowing kicks out and catches Sparxx in the face with a dropkick. He grabs Sparxx as he gets up and slings him to the ropes - overhead belly-to-belly suplex! Crowing drags Sparxx to his feet - Wings of the Phoenix! Crowing hooks the leg and Junior counts One…Two…Three.
WINNER of the second fall, in 36:40, Crowing.Both men get slowly to their feet. Sparxx swings, but Crowing ducks and traps him for a release belly-to-belly suplex. Sparxx flips in the air and lands on his feet. Crowing turns, and Sparxx pegs him with a super kick. He’s a little slow with the follow up, however, and Crowing is able to catch the roundhouse kick and haul him in for a leg trap suplex. He covers, but Sparxx rolls a shoulder before three. Crowing is up and stomps on Sparxx. Crowing grabs his legs and although Sparxx fights it, he turns him over and locks in the D-Tuner. Junior is in position, but Sparxx refuses to submit. He struggles, but Crowing has it cinched in tight. Finally, Sparxx reaches the ropes to force the break.
JP Sparxx has used his first rope break.Ring Announcer: “There are fifteen minutes remaining in the match”
As soon as Crowing releases the hold, Sparxx drags himself under the ropes and drops to the floor. He limps around the ring, trying to work out the kinks, as Junior starts to count. Crowing slides out and attempts to pitch him back in, but Sparxx grabs the ropes and turns his shoulder, sending Crowing into the ringpost. Crowing turns - and JP nails him with a super kick. Sparxx stuffs Crowing under the ropes and dives in, making the cover. He tries to get a foot on the ropes again, but this time Junior sees it.
JP Sparxx has received his second warning.Sparxx gets up and has words with Junior - that is until Crowing attempts to roll him up from behind. Sparxx grabs the ropes to block and stomps on Crowing’s head.
JP Sparxx has used his second rope break.Ring Announcer: “There are ten minutes remaining in the match”
Sparxx is justifiably unhappy with Junior’s call, but chooses to take it out on Crowing, stomping the champion into the mat. He drags Crowing to his feet and shoves him into the corner. He lifts Crowing onto the top rope and starts to climb up as well. Crowing battles back, and they end up standing on the top rope exchanging blows. Sparxx manages to knock the champion off balance and then leaps up and snaps him over with a hurricanrana. Sparxx crawls over and makes the cover, and Junior counts One…Two…Thr - Crowing barely rolls a shoulder in time.
Ring Announcer: “There are five minutes remaining in the match”
Sparxx drags Crowing to his feet and sends him to the ropes, leveling him with a leg lariat. He goes to the ropes and hits a springboard legdrop. He pulls the champion up and sends him into the corner. Crowing reverses, but Sparxx re-reverses and hits the Bad Moon Rising. Crowing crumples to the mat and Sparxx goes to the top rope. He takes a second to steady himself and leaps - OMG - No! Crowing rolls out of the way and Sparxx hits the mat hard. Crowing uses the ropes to pull himself to his feet as Sparxx rolls on the mat. Crowing grabs Sparxx - Wings of the Phoenix! Junior slides into position and counts One…Two…Three.
WINNER and still OOWF Onslaught Champion, in 59:58, Crowing.
FLYIN HAWAIIANS vs. ATTITUDE ADJUSTER & HONCHO WILLIAMS – OOWF World Tag Team Title MatchThe Kai and Aina stay in the ring while AA & Honcho decide who starts the match. OK, so what actually happens is that AA waves Honcho into the ring and Honcho decides to take offense to be talked to like an underling. AA explains that it’s all part of his master-plan and “oh, look out…” as Aina dropkicks Honcho in the back, sending him face first into the turnbuckle. AA drops off the apron, shaking his head at his rookie teammate in patronizing fashion while Aina drops onto his knees and the Kai nails Honcho as he rounds out of the corner with a picture perfect poetry in motion. Honcho staggers out of the corner and Aina rolls him up for a one count. Aina doesn’t press the issue and lifts Honcho to his feet with an arm-lock, sticking his foot in the back of Honcho’s knee as he comes up to keep him under control. The Kai returns to his corner as Aina walks a dazed Honcho over to the ropes and stretches his arm around the top rope. The referee counts for the hold to be released and Aina uses the full five count before kicking Honcho in the gut and whipping him to the corner.
A swift tag to the Kai and Kai holds Honcho over his knee as Aina kips to the top and lands the Broken Palm legdrop. Honcho rolls away grabbing his back in agony and starts edging towards his corner, where it seems AA is on the outside apparently discussing strategy with #Heel Cowboy Johnny Adrenaline. The Kai laughs and drops a knee on Honcho’s already hurt arm, locking on a short arm scissor for extra damage before lifting Honcho to his feet and nailing a nasty open hand strike. Honcho sways as the Kai unleashes another and another, then looks to spit on his palm as he goes for a showpiece strike, but before the loogie-assisted smack is layed down, Honcho EXPLODES and drops the Kai with a sudden and ring shaking spinebuster. With both men down, Aina shouts for Kai to make the tag while AA golf claps Honcho’s effort as he slowly makes his way back to the apron. Kai makes the tag and Aina jumps into the ring and grabs Honcho’s leg, dragging him away from the corner as AA negligently leans out for a tag. Aina drags Honcho to his feet and throws a body kick that Honcho catches with his good arm but Aina just uses the leverage to nail a nasty enziguri which sends Honcho into the ropes. Aina bounces off the ropes and looks to hit Honcho with a knee to the back but AA drops off the apron and drags Honcho out of the ring so Aina ends up tumbling through the suddenly unoccupied ropes. Honcho drags himself to his feet by the apron as AA lays some cheeky boots to the stunned Aina. Aina gets to his feet and starts to fight back so Honcho goes to his aid, just as the Kai launches a plancha from the ring. AA sees him coming and backs off, so Kai crashes straight through the tussling Aina & Honcho. The referee slides out of the ring to tend to the carnage and AA directs his attention to the grievous injuries apparently suffered by Honcho. With the referee distracted, AA grabs an international object, let’s say it’s a coconut and smashes it over the Kai’s head, knocking him out. Noelani charges round to remonstrate with him, but in her rush to protect her boys, she dislodges #Heel Cowboy Johnny Adrenaline who falls towards her and trips her so she falls, hits her head off the ring steps and is apparently rendered unconscious. Aina sees this and is about to go to her aid when AA uses the distraction to poke him in the eyes and roll him into the ring. AA retrieves a steel chair from under the ring and slides in as Aina gets to his feet. Aina takes a shot to the gut from the edge of the chair before AA lays a nasty shot to his head which drops him.
Outside the ring, the referee realises that Honcho isn’t that badly hurt and starts to turn around at the sound of the chair shots. Seeing this, AA drops the chair and falls to the mat as though felled by a mighty blow. The referee slides into the ring and sees both men down, with Honcho and the Kai dragging themselves upright at ringside. AA struggles to his feet, selling a phantom chairshot just ahead of Aina (selling two actual chairshots) and lands a kick to the gut followed by a patented AA DDT onto the dropped steel chair and covers for… No? The referee drags AA off Aina and tells him that Honcho is the legal man. AA remonstrates with the official as Aina rolls away and the Kai slaps his hands together and charges into the ring. AA sees the Kai coming so drags the referee into the way of his charge and gets crushed between the two. Kai tosses the limp official out of his way and grabs AA, just as Honcho slides into the ring. AA knees the Kai in the Hawaiian Strudel as Honcho nails a picture perfect Irish Thunderbolt. The referee takes a while to come too, despite AA’s exhortations and when he does he counts 1-2, NO! as Honcho makes the cover. Honcho uses the momentum of the Kai’s kickout to roll him onto his front and slaps on the Nosebreaker while AA jumps up and down on the apron shouting “ring the bell!” Aina darts into the ring and drops an elbow across Honcho’s back, causing him to break the hold. The referee orders Aina back into his corner, but also sees AA getting into the ring and pulling a pair of brass knuckles out of his shorts. Honcho lifts the Kai to his feet and nails a neat backbreaker as the referee orders AA to hand over the weapon and get back into his corner. Honcho looks askance at his team-mate as he stalks the Kai for a match-winning superkick, but doesn’t notice Noelani (who has regained consciousness) tossing one of the title belts to Aina who pastes Honcho with a nasty shot. Honcho is staggered by the blow and Aina throws the belt out the ring and sets him up for a flapjack and Kai comes off the ropes to deliver the For Pele neckbreaker to Honcho. Aina makes the cover as the referee turns back round, ignoring AA’s protestations that Kai is the legal man and the 1-2-3 is academic.
WINNERS via pin-fall in 17:12 and STILL OOWF World Tag Team Champions, the Kai & Aina, the Flyin Hawaiians!
PSYKLE vs. MATT FOLZ vs. STANK vs. RICKY SOARING EAGLE – OOWF Intercontinental Title Fatal Four WayRicky Soaring Eagle is out first to boos from the crowd, which he returns with a stone-cold glare that silences those close by. He climbs into the ring and perches silently on a turnbuckle. Matt Folz is out next to even louder boos, carrying his stolen Intercontinental Championship and accompanied by Mai Muyo. Mai raises his arm at the top of the ramp in defiance of the crowd’s anger, as they walk down arm in arm, seemingly over their difference from earlier. “Skin” starts playing before Folz enters the ring, leading to a giant pop as Folz expresses visible annoyance as Stank comes out. The longest-reigning World Champion raises his arms overhead and storms the ring to crowd appreciation and applause, staring down both his opponents in ring with an “I’m Too Old For This Shit” look. Finally, “Animal I Have Become” plays as the OOWF’s largest athlete, the Psycho Cycler emerges, pointing straight at the stolen Intercontinental Championship that the referee now holds. Entering the ring over the ropes, Psykle grabs the title and holds it in the air to cheers before handing it back to the referee.
The referee checks Matt Folz for brass knuckles on his person, given his action in his match with Mai earlier, but there are no weapons to be found. The referee calls for the bell, and this match is ON! The four begin to circle, but Stank is a veteran of these situations. He swiftly trips up Psykle with a kick to the knee, and charges forward with a double-clothesline to Ricky and Folz as they both charge toward Psykle. Folz back up, big backflip drop to Matt from Stank. Ricky up, big right to the face to take him down. Psykle suddenly grabs Stank from behind with a back suplex as the former World Champion roars. Ricky clips Psykle again under the knee, viciously dropping elbows onto the interior after Psykle falls. As Folz and Stank rise, Folz sees an opportunity and dropkicks Psykle in the knee as RSE holds the leg. Stank surveys the situation, letting them go at it for a moment, but then clotheslining Ricky Soaring Eagle out of the ring in a Pounce-like charge. Folz grabs the arm of Stank as he tries to regain his balance, kicking him in the shoulder as he tweaks the armbar. Stank is trying to swing at Folz, but instead chooses to grab the rope. Folz yells “I Have Until Five!” at the ref, but he apparently only has two, as Psykle yanks him off and throws him backward. Slightly hobbled, Psykle wraps a big goozle around the throat of Folz. Folz, expecting a chokeslam, kicks at the leg again, but instead Psykle yanks Matt by the throat in to a big clothesline.
Stank doesn’t give Psykle time to rest, pulling Psykle backwards into a back bodydrop of his own. Stank gets atop Psykle and begins pounding away, but is met with a kick to the head by Ricky Soaring Eagle, who has re-entered the ring. Ricky flips Stank’s arm over his own neck, and manages to yank the tremendous Stank up into a snap suplex! Ricky hooks the leg, only good for a one-count as the veteran Stank gets his leg on the bottom rope. Mai Muyo is yelling at Matt Folz from the outside to get up, which pisses Ricky off. He grabs the rising Matt by the hair, and yells something inaudible like “You want him up so bad?”, but Matt quickly cuts RSE out under the leg, yanking up his leg into an AnkleLock! Matt is exercising very heavy torque, attempting to squeeze a tap out before the others rise. However, Ricky holds out in time for Psykle to get up. Matt releases the hold as Psykle charges past him with a clothesline, Psykle off the opposite rope, big boot attempt (wisely with the weaker knee), Matt ducks under, but Stank charges Folz with a big SPEAR! from the other side of the ring. Ricky dives onto Stank with lefts and rights before he can even attempt a cover, but he is picked off by Psykle, who manages to lift and Samoan Drop the raging three-hundred pounder! Psykle into a cover, but after a two-count, Ricky rolls through to push Psykle’s shoulders to the mat! One count before Stank breaks up the pin hard, kicking Psykle hard in the leg and knocking him over and through.
Stank and RSE are trading punches in the middle of the ring now, as Folz and Psykle attempt to regain their bearings. Mai is whispering something into Folz’s ear, and he stays down a moment. Stank pushes Eagle off the ropes, tries to pick him off into a spinning slam, but Soaring Eagle yanks Stank’s neck on the way down to use a modified Paydirt! Stank bounds up, stunned, as RSE bounds off the opposite ropes and charges Stank with a clothesline to send him over the top rope to the floor! As Psykle tries to shake the pain out of his knee, Ricky Soaring Eagle is suddenly atop the stumbling Psykle, raining down forearms on the back. RSE attempts to scoop the mammoth man for a Return To The Earth, but Psykle breaks free and launches RSE over his head with undirected force over the top rope, sending the Eagle soaring on top of Stank on the outside! Psykle goes down to one knee, as his leg is still bothering him. As the referee checks on Stank and Soaring Eagle on the outside, Mai Muyo pops up on the apron—and tosses the pair of brass knuckles from earlier to Matt Folz! As Psykle turns around, Folz BLASTS him between the eyes with a brass-knuckle shot! The large Psykle falls like a ton of bricks. Folz goes for the cover as the referee turns around: 1-2-3!
WINNER in 11:15…and NEW Intercontinental Champion…Matt Folz!
Matt Folz scurries out of the ring as Mai Muyo hands him his new Intercontinental Championship. She raises his arm again as they walk up the ramp to crowd boos. Mai slaps the belt as Folz puts it around his waist, yelling “Greatest Technical Wrestler Alive!” prompting more boos. Stank and Ricky, getting up from the mats, look pissed as fuck as Psykle begins to rise.
STAN FULTON vs. LD WILLIAMS – OOWF World Heavyweight Title MatchLD comes out to a huge pop. He is all business, too, and while he normally doesn't do so much with the fan interaction, there's even less of it now as he comes to the ring. He turns and waits, and "The Crusher" by the Ramones fires up and Stan "The Crusher" Fulton comes out to a chorus of boos. He rolls under the ropes and displays his belt for all to see. He hands it off to Hightower, who does the usual thing with it, and then we are off.
Opening lock up and Crusher is not wasting any time. He basically plows LD Williams backward right into the ring post. If those pads weren't there, LD would be impaled on the turnbuckles. As it is, the breath is completely knocked out of him, with the force used by the big man. LD crumples as Stan backs up to about mid ring, and runs back in with a big splash. LD crumples some more, and Stan tries to repeat, but this time LD is ready and dodges, and Stan eats ring post. He turns, grabbing his chest a bit, and turns right into a big boot from LD. Stan grabs his jaw and staggers back, and LD follows him with a flurry of chops and stuff. He grabs the Stan's arm and whips him into the ropes. Crusher bounces back right into LD's elbow. LD breezes past him hits the far ropes and drop kicks the back of Stan's knees, and he goes down to one foot. Another rope run, and LD takes him to the mat with a Canadian Bulldog. Instead of going for the pin, LD gets to his feet, and puts the boots to Crusher. Lots. Really stiff, too. Ouch.
LD reaches down and pulls Crusher up to his knees, and blasts him with a few European uppercuts. Fulton is woozy and allows LD to get him to his feet. LD makes sure he's steady, and then goes toward the ropes again. But Fulton wasn't that woozy and as LD bounces off the ropes again, Fulton greets him with a nice lariat that puts LD on the ground. Now it's Stan's turn to kick LD around, literally, as he shakes the cobwebs. He pulls LD to his feet, and holds him by the head with one hand and applies a really huge Big-Show-Esque chop or two or ...five. LD crunches over, and Stan lifts him up and drops him to the mat with a huge slam. LD counts the lights as Fulton rushes back and then jumps to land a bonzai drop, but LD rolls out of the way. This enrages Crusher, who picks LD up and lifts him to his shoulders and hits...a SAMOAN DROP! He hooks the leg for a pin, one...two...NO! LD kicks out and with a bit of authority, so that Fulton has to back off and regroup.
Williams gets to his feet now, and Fulton sizes him up. Fulton charges, and LD...waits until just the right moment and deftly sidesteps, getting behind Fulton, snatching his arm along the way. He now has Fulton in a chicken wing, and trips him over his feet until he's down and into the OMG Too Soon Crippler Crossface! Fulton reaches out to grab the ropes, but can't. LD has him cinched in pretty tightly. Fulton tries to crawl across the mat, but he's still just out of reach of the ropes. The crowd yells out in warning, just as Fulton looks like he might be giving up, and we see Matt Folz sprinting down to ringside. Folz stands at ringside, yelling words of encouragement. Fulton tries to reach the ropes again, and Matt encourages him, and 'absentmindedly' pushes on the bottom rope. Fulton grabs it, the referee signals the break. LD is livid, but Hightower explains that he still had to let go, and then turns to discuss matters with Folz. Folz pleads his innocence in long drawn out fashion, citing wrestling matches, and other precedent. Williams turns back to Fulton who nails him with a thumb to the eye. Williams responds accordingly, and Fulton drops him with a neckbreaker. Fulton makes the pin just as Hightower turns around, missing everything, and counts, one..two...NO! Williams kicks out again.
Fulton is just about to do something when the crowd goes wild again, and Psykle comes running down? The hell? Psykle comes running down at attacks Folz at ring side. Fulton glances that way, and that's all the space Williams needs to get free and then come at Fulton with double axe handle to the back of his turned head. He clobbers Fulton and then commences on a patented LD Williams beatdown that would make his mom proud. He gets Fulton up and tries to get him into the pile driver position for the Canadian Destroyer, but Fulton isn't budging. Williams pulls him into a short arm clothesline instead, knocking him to the ground, and then brings him into ... WHEELBARROW SUPLEX! Williams makes the pin, and one..two.. NO! Fulton kicks out. Williams is annoyed.
Folz and Psykle are still getting in each others' ways on the outside. This brings out Evans, Sparxx, Kai, Aina, and Mai. Which in turn brings out Danny, Lobo, Stank, Chad, Zane, Alex, and Fire. They all square off with their partners of choice. Williams turns back to the ring just in time to see Fulton flying at him from the second turnbuckle. LD dodges at the last minute. No Crusher for the Crusher. More like crush-and-burn. Williams grabs him and gets the big man over with a snap suplex. He goes for a pin, one...two...NO! They both get to their feet, and Williams kicks Fulton in the gut. Fulton doubles over and...it looks like...Williams is going to go for the Canadian Destroyer! Williams tries it....no go....so he settles for a plain ol' piledriver instead. Down they go, Williams rolls Fulton over for the pin...one...two...THREE!
WINNER in 37:11 and NEW OOWF World Heavyweight Champion – LD Williams
After the bell rings, Stan is looking around the ring in shock. He reaches out and grabs the belt from Hightower before it can be handed over to LD Williams. The crowd boos. LD looks at him, breathing heavily, but still very willing to go over this. Fulton looks down at the title, and around the arena. At the faces of the New Guard and the "old" guard who have gone to opposite sides of the ring....the fans....back down at the belt. He nods his head, as if acceptance has set in. Fulton extends his arm to hand the belt to LD Williams.
LD Williams, however, was NOT born yesterday. LD Williams is not Sting. LD Williams shakes his head no, and laughs.
The New Guard begins to climb into the ring, but Fulton turns and snarls at them to back off. The New Guard seems less than pleased by this turn of events, but does back down to the floor, where the "older" guard keep an eye on them. LD sees this, and there's the Traditional Wrestling Stares that get exchanged between everyone. Stan gets tired of holding his hand out and drops the belt to the mat, and turns to go out of the ring. LD Williams hesitates for a bit, and then reaches down to pick it up. But once he does, Fulton turns around quicker than anything, and WHAM! Fulton nails LD Williams with a DDT right on the belt. Ouch.
At this, the New Guard floods the ring and attacks LD, which brings the faces into the ring as well. We again pair off with our dance partners for the next several weeks. Security floods the ring and everyone eventually gets separate escorts to the back. There's not really enough of them though, and there's one guy to try and corral Stan and LD until another few come back. Stan grabs the belt and nails LD in the face with it, busting LD open and shattering the belt.
Finally a few more security arrive and restore order as the escort Fulton the back, and LD to medical.
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