OOWF MidWeek Mayhem
Live! From the Santuck Flea Market, Slapout, Alabama
April 9, 2014
<before the action starts, the OOWF locker room empties and they silently come down and surround the ring. Everyone bows their head, and the bell tolls for the passing of the Ultimate Warrior
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The wrestlers all stand quietly, then Warrior’s WWE music plays and they all head to the back as the crowd roars>
MOOSEHEAD JACK & GHOSTHEAD vs. MURPHY’S LAWMoose and Ghost are announced first and come to the ring. Since they are outside, Moose lights up a cigar and takes a few puffs, then rolls into the ring and slumps in the corner. Ghost steps between the ropes and stands defiantly in the middle of the ring with his arms folded across his chest as the fans boo him mercilessly. Murpy’s Law is announced next and the crowd roars for the Boston siblings. DK and Dee race to the ring and slide under the bottom rope. Ghost grabs Dee and backs her into the corner and immediately starts laying in chops, Moose pulls himself to his feet and ducks a clothesline attempt from DK and peppers him with punches to the face.
Moose tries to whip DK to the ropes, but DK reverses it, Moose holds onto the top rope and DK charges and clotheslines him over the top rope to the floor. Moose lands on his feet and grabs DK’s leg and pulls him out of the ring and the two trade hockey style punches. Inside the ring, Dee reverses Ghost in the corner and lays in some stiff chops of her own, the crowd chanting WHOOOOO every time she lands a chop. Ghost rakes her eyes getting her to back off, then grabs her head and rakes her eyes on the top rope, then chokes her on the top rope until the referee threatens disqualification, then finally snaps her backward into the ring.
Dee rolls right to her feet and Ghost charges trying for a clothesline, but Dee ducks it, grabs Ghost from behind and hits a RELEASE GERMAN SUPLEX! Ghost lands hard on the back of his head, but Dee doesn’t try a cover. Outside the ring DK starts getting the advantage hammering Moose with punches to the face. Moose staggers and grabs a beer from someone in the crowd and splashes it in DK’s face which slows him for just a second, but that is long enough for Moose to grab a chair. Before he can use it though, Dee dives between the ropes and slams into Moose, driving him ribs first into the guardrail, and sending the chair flying.
DK rolls into the ring where Ghost is just getting to his feet, Ghost bends over grabbing the back of his neck, and DK nails a swinging neck breaker, then floats over and covers, but Ghost kicks out at one. DK pulls Ghost to his feet and hooks him and hits a snap suplex, holds on and gets to his feet and slips behind him and goes for a German suplex, but Ghost grabs his arms and fights the move, then catches him with an elbow to the side of the head that staggers DK. Ghost grabs his head and slams it into the top turnbuckle, then slams DK between the eyes with a headbutt dropping him to one knee.
Outside the ring, Dee pulls Moose to his feet and scoops him up and slams him on the floor, then shows her athleticism by leaping onto the guardrail and hitting a standing moonsault! Moose grabs his ribs and howls in pain. Daniella races around the ring and climbs onto the apron and calls for her brother to make the tag, but Ghost cuts DK off with a vicious forearm to the side of the head. Ghost hooks DK and lifts him for a suplex then drops him stomach first on the ropes, bounds off the far ropes and KILLS DK with a boot to the face! DK sails off the apron and slams back first into the guardrail. Ghost smirks and slowly leaves the ring and grabs DK and pulls him to his feet.
Ghost lifts DK in a bear hug and Moose races around the ring, leaps from the stairs and connects with an elbow right between DK’s eyes. Inside the ring Dee screams at the referee to stop the double team, and he orders Moose to the corner, but the damage has already been done. Ghost pulls a dazed DK to his feet and rolls him into the ring and follows.
Ghost waits for DK to get to his feet, then springs off the middle rope and hits the EIDOLON! Ghost snarls and pulls DK to his feet and sets him up for the VEX VICE, but DK elbows Ghost repeatedly in the side of the head and breaks the hold. Ghost staggers to the corner and tags in Moose, Jack runs in and tries to clothesline Murphy, but DK ducks and runs Jack to the corner and hits the CHAOS THEORY! DK gets to his feet and falls backward and tags in Dee!
Dee comes in as Moose gets to his feet, she levels him with a punch to the face, Ghost comes in and he gets one for good measure. Moose is back on his feet and Dee grabs him and hits an INVERTED ATOMIC DROP sending Moose to the mat. Ghost tries a clothesline, but Daniella ducks it and nails Ghost with a HANGMAN’S NECKBREAKER! Ghost pulls himself to his feet using the ropes, but DK is back in and he clotheslines Ghost over the top to the floor.
Inside the ring, Daniella pulls Moose to his feet and he nails her with a punch to the throat! Daniella staggers back a few steps, but when Moose goes after her, she KILLS him with a SPINNING BACK FIST to the temple! Moose staggers, but before he can fall, DK turns around and they hit the CALL OF THE WILD nearly cutting Moose in half! Daniella covers, rolling Moose up, one, two, THREE!
WINNERS in 17:11 – Murphy’s Law
Ghost gets back into the ring and he and the Murphy’s brawl a little bit. Moose gets back up and joins the fray, but soon enough the Murphy’s grab a couple of chairs and Moose and Ghost decide to bail and live to fight another day.
TOMMY WILDER v. MIRANDA WILLIAMS vs. ALEXIS DARLINGWilder is announced first and races to the ring and slides under the bottom rope, then leaps to the top rope and fires the crowd up. The crowd loves Wilder and we see a group in the audience holding up a sign that says WILD CHILDS, Wilder points to them and the teenage girls squeal. Wilder does a back flip off the top rope as Miranda Williams is announced. She comes to the ring and steps between the ropes and gets a loud ovation from the crowd. She and Wilder shake hands and wait for Lexie. Alexis Darling’s music plays and she comes out from behind the curtain and the cheers immediately turn to vicious boos. Alexis looks around the Flea Market with disgust and slowly makes her way to the ring. Alexis steps between the ropes and the referee calls for the bell.
As soon as the bell rings, Alexis bails out of the ring and takes a seat at the OOWF announce table. Wilder and Williams look at one another then shrug and lock up.
Razz: Uh….Lexie, I don’t know if you noticed this or not, but there’s a match going on in the ring that you are supposed to be a part of
LD: My name is Alexis, Razz, I expect to be addressed properly
Razz: Uh…..sorry
Russ: There IS a match going on….
LD: Russ….do you know who I am?
Russ: Yes, I think you just made that perfectly clear
LD: Quite frankly, this match is beneath me. I am a Darling. I am ALEXIS Darling, wasting my time on……these two is simply not going to happen
Razz: Well….ok then you heard it here firstInside the ring, Miranda tries to take Tommy down to the mat with a top wristlock but Tommy bridges to keep from going down on his back, then shows impressive flexibility by kipping to his feet and reversing the wrist lock into an arm wringer, then climbing the turnbuckle and snapping Miranda to the mat with a HURRACARANA! Wilder covers, but Miranda bridges out of it and gets to her feet. She hits the ropes but Wilder drops to the mat, Miranda steps over him, Wilder pops back to his feet and tries a hip toss on Miranda, but Miranda blocks it and takes Wilder over, Wilder lands on his feet and hops to the top rope and hits a TWISTING SENTON! He lands on top of Miranda and gets a one count, but Miranda bridges to her feet and rolls through and takes Wilder to the mat with a BACKSLIDE for a two count. Wilder kicks free and both pop to their feet and get a roaring applause from the crowd.
Wilder and Williams lock up again, and while they are putting on a wrestling clinic, Razz and Russ chat with Alexis some more
Russ: Do you SEE the action in the ring? These two are PHENOMENAL athletes!
LD: They are good, but they are not Kings
Russ: The very same Kings who attacked a defenseless woman and put her in the hospital?
LD: Oh boo hoo. If you can’t defend yourself you have NO business being here. Where was the outcry when I was attacked by Moosehead Jack? Huh? But let precious Jamie Folz get what she deserves and the whole roster goes crazy
Razz: Well, it WAS a little over the top….
LD: I learned real fast, you either get tough, or get hurt. Clearly Mrs. Folz is not tough enough for the OOWF, and based on his reaction to all this, neither is her husband
Russ: That’s going too damn far! The man is beside his wife in the hospital!
LD: A real man would have done something about it, a real man like our OOWF World Heavyweight Champion Christian Carter
Russ: That man makes me sick!
LD: Watch your tongue Russ……or I just might cut it offInside the ring, Miranda has Williams in the corner and hauls him to the top rope for a SUPERPLEX, but Wilder fights it and sends Miranda falling into the ring. We hear Lexie get up from the table and she races around the ring and grabs Wilder’s foot and knocks him off the top rope. Wilder crashes to the floor HARD and grabs his leg. He landed right on the knee that LD Williams tried to destroy a few weeks ago. The referee goes out to check on Wilder, and when he does, Alexis slides back into the ring and attacks Miranda from behind. She hammerlocks her arm and runs her between the turnbuckles into the post, then throws her out of the ring.
Lexie leaves the ring and glares at the fans taunting her. She grabs Miranda by the hair and lifts her in the air and hits a DARLING DRIVER on the floor! Miranda is OUT! But Lexie is not done. She makes her way around the ring and waits for Wilder to gingerly stand up. He takes a few steps and hobbles badly. Lexie charges at him and CLIPS his knee! Wilder falls to the floor in pain, Lexie stomps on his throat, then rolls him into the ring and traps him in the MONEY CLIP! Wilder fights it and tries to make the ropes, but he can’t hold on and is forced to tap out much to the dismay of the crowd.
WINNER in 18:27 – Alexis Darling
Lexie keeps the hold on until the referee threatens disqualification, then breaks the hold and leaves the ring and walks back to the back with a disgusted look on her face. Officials help Miranda to her feet, she is LIVID at Lexie’s actions. She rolls into the ring and helps Wilder get to his feet, she and the referee help him to the back as the crowd gives them a standing ovation.
SUICIDE KINGS vs. TEXPRESSChad and Zane start out fast, driving the Suicide Kings from the ring. They regroup on the outside and the bell rings and this one starts officially. Chad and Jason do a nice wrestling sequence, ending with Chad getting a small package for 2. Jason smiles and then nails an intentional low blow right in front of the referee. The bell immediately rings.
Winners in 56 seconds by DQ: Texpress.
After the match, Jason starts nailing Chad with strong right hands. Zane rushes in to help his partner, only to be taken out by a huge lariat from Reyna. The Kings stomp on the fallen Texans, then slide out to grab some chairs. Before they can do any serious damage though, the crowd roars as Murphy's Law and Danny Taylor come sprinting from the back. The Kings decide that discretion is the better part of valor and slide out of the ring, making their way to the back to a massive chorus of boos.
LD WILLIAMS vs. POWERThe combatants have made their way to the ring. There's a healthy glare exchanged between the two while they await the bell. Once they finally get that, there's an opening lock up. It seems Williams may have slightly underestimated Power, as she is able to woman-handle him back into the corner, and they stay locked up for a while and the referee has to separate them. LD smirks at Power, who gives him a little smile, but LD knocks that right off her face with a big right. Power spins around and LD kicks her in the gut, like he's going to set up the Canadian Destroyer early, however, Power steps back out of it. LD follows up with some more offense until Power is in the corner. LD peppers her with some more punches and offense. The referee has to again step in, and they separate. Finally we get a lock up and some armwork and some rope work. LD gets the upper hand and plants Power with a DDT and goes for the pin, but no just a one count. The DDT seems to have fired Power up, and she gets to her feet and whips LD against the ropes. She catches him on the rebound and plants him with a Gorilla Slam. Power goes for the cover, one, two...NO! Power drags LD to is feet with the assistance of some European uppercuts. She whips him into the ropes again, and this time though LD is ready with a shortarm clothesline, and then into a quick snap suplex. He goes to make the pin, but Power is ready with a big uppercut to the jaw just as LD is falling down for the pin. LD collapses in a heap. Power steps back, waiting, as LD slowly gets to his feet. She waits....waits...waits....and LD turns....SPEAR! LD goes down in a heap, and Power grabs him, lifting him up into position for Power driver, but before she can really get it started, Korn's "Shoots and Ladders" starts to play, and Chloe walks to the top of the ramp. Power drops LD to the mat and goes to the ropes, daring her sister to come down there. Chloe waves and blows kisses. Power stands on the bottom rope trying to convince her to come to the ring. Chloe smiles, but then looks surprised and points, mouthing the words "Behind you." Power turns to see that LD has recovered. With a quick kick to the midsection, we know what time it is...CANADIAN DESTROYER! LD goes for the pin, one...two...THREE!
WINNER in 14:54 – LD Williams
ECOSYSTEM & FIREWOMAN vs. STANK & STAN FULTONThe Saints of Sinners are out first, with the crowd booing the two accomplished big men from the moment they come through the curtain. The OOWFtron plays an “Earlier Today” clip of Stan bloodying Eco and mock-crucifying him, drawing mostly boos from the crowd. Stank is playing off them a bit, but Stan just stares forward…cold…empty. Firewoman’s music hits the PA system, and she comes out to a cheer…but by the way she doesn’t wait or look back, we realize quickly that Ecosystem is not coming to join her. The crowd boos this, and the referee isn’t sure what to do, but he gets signals from the crew at ringside that this match is set to go on. Stank hesitates a bit, but Stan steps in front of him and Firewoman goes into fighting position. The referee, hesitantly, calls for the bell.
Russ: Dammit, this is not right! Stan Fulton takes Ecosystem out, and now we’ve got a damn handicap match!
Firewoman immediately goes lumberjack on the big man, trying to chop him down with swift kicks…she’s evading Stan Fulton’s swings, right up until she doesn’t, as The Crusher drops Firewoman with a big right to the face….Fulton throws Fire into the corner and continues to work over her torso and gut with body blows, backing mechanically off every time the referee reaches a four count and coming back in….finally, Firewoman nails Stan with an elbow to the jaw, and another, knocking him back – she hops up to the top rope, and hits a quasi-desperation moonsault to take Stan off his feet!...Fire rolls away from Stan, looking for separation, but Stan is back up quickly – CLEAR CUT! Stan hits the Clear Cut Clothesline, good for two.
Stan drags Firewoman over to the unfriendly corner, and Stank and Stan tag in and out, taking turns putting the boots to Firewoman…Firewoman fights out a couple times, but every time, a quick tag sends her someone fresher…until Fire manages to catch Stan Fulton with a jawjacker and drops Stank off the apron with a back elbow! Firewoman charges forward and hooks Stan Fulton – FIRESTORM DDT! Firewoman goes into the quick cover…and Stan POWERS out at one. Firewoman can barely believe it, quickly going to kick Stan, who only winces slightly as he rises. Fulton goozles Firewoman – but you don’t get to Zombie Hulk Up like that on Firewoman, who pulls him down into the Last Chancery choke! Last Chancery! Stan is struggling, can’t reach the ropes…until he physically pulls Firewoman up and tosses her into the unfriendly corner, splashing her in for good measure!
Stank takes the tag in and looks down at Fire, shaking his head after a couple stomps and whipping her into the opposite, empty corner – she bounces off and falls to the ground. Stank motions for a charge, waiting for Fire to rise. Suddenly, the crowd is buzzing loudly. Stank looks around for a moment, doesn’t see clearly, and then charges Fire who is now standing in the corner – but Fire gets her knees up! Stank stumbles off, and out of the crowd…
…it’s ECOSYSTEM! A bandaged Ecosystem runs up the steps, climbs to the top rope, tags Fire, and goes flying off the top with a missile dropkick to take Stank off his feet! Stan Fulton is about to come in, but Eco sticks the landing, hops, BLUE SUPERKICK to Stan Fulton! Fulton falls off the apron outside the ring! Eco turns around - right into a big clothesline from Stank! Stank hooks Eco up, looking for the Stankbomb – but Eco hurricaranas him into the turnbuckles! Fire catches him there with a front facelock and tags Eco, coming out of the corner with her Tornado DDT! Firewoman kips up and tags Eco right back as he goes to the top rope – SAVIOR SPLASH onto Stank!
Razz: Now we got a double team going! This ain’t fair!
Russ: And the handicap match was? The one that Stan Fulton caused?
Speak of the devil and he shall appear, and Stan Fulton is back in the ring as Ecosystem goes for the cover, and STOMPS on his head hard. Firewoman runs into the ring, but Stan Fulton SPLATS her with a spinebuster! The referee is telling Fulton to return to his corner, but not before he hooks Ecosystem up and powerslams him to the mat! Stan finally exits as Fire rolls to her corner as well, and Stank begins to take advantage by stomping on the injured Ecosystem…Eco is looking pretty weak on the ground…Stank runs the ropes, jumps, STANKONIA 2.0 TO ECO! Stank goes for the cover…but Ecosystem kicks out! Stank shakes his head and hooks Eco over the shoulders for the STANK-U!
Eco looks limp as he hangs over Stank’s back, as Stank mocks Fire…but as Stank tries to follow through, Ecosystem drops out the back…Stank spins around, right into a ENF! ENF! ECO’S NEW FINISHER! Eco stumbles back and Fire blind tags in – Stan runs in but Eco charges him again, and the two tumble out of the ring – Firewoman to the top rope, BEST FIRESAULT EVER! Firewoman hooks Stank’s leg after that nice bit of teamwork: 1-2-3!
Winners in 8:54…Firewoman and Ecosystem!
Firewoman collapses, not unconscious but exhausted, in the ring. Outside the ring, Ecosystem is trying to kick at Stan, but Stan scoops Ecosystem and SLAMS him down across the steel steps! Eco is writhing in agony as Stan kicks the top steps off, lays Eco across the bottom step...and hits THE CRUSHER on Eco, right against the steel! Eco’s head wound from earlier is reopened as the EMTs begin to pour down. Stank, who is up faster than Firewoman, motions to Stan that it might be time to go, but Stan first takes Ecosystem’s Onslaught Championship, looks at it…then pulls Ecosystem up by the hair and SLAMS the belt against his skull, before throwing Ecosystem back down to the EMTs and tossing the belt on top of him. The Saints exit, as Fire rolls out of the ring to check on Eco, quickly joined by Mai.
ALEXANDER DARLING vs. DANNY TAYLOR – Best of Five Series, Match FourWe come up in the back and see two podiums on one sits a bowl of some glue like adhesive, on the other a bowl of shards of shattered glass. Alexander Darling stands on one side, and Dynamite Danny Taylor on the other. A ref stands between them looking like he wants to be anywhere but there. Alex nods down to the bowls, but Danny shakes his head no. Alex never takes his eyes off of Taylor, but slowly dips one taped hand into the glue, and then into the shards of glass. He holds it up and the glints off the broken glass. He again looks to the bowls, and then back to Taylor, who again shakes his head no. Again without taking his eyes off of Taylor he dips his other hand into each bowl and now holds both glass covered hands up to Taylor. He nods down to the bowl and locks eyes with Taylor, who slowly shakes his head no. Alexander closes his eyes and takes a deep breath.
Alex: You wanted to know how you survive against an opponent like moose? You never hold back.
Alex opens his eyes and looks to the ref and motions for them to head to the ring.
Back in the arena King of the World hits and Alexander Darling comes out holding his glass covered fists in front of himself. He gets a somewhat mixed reaction from the crowd, but doesn't even notice as he climbs the steps. The ref holds the ropes apart, and Alex calmly enters and stands in the far corner. Here Comes the Boom hits and Dynamite Danny Taylor comes out. He gets a cheap pop, but there is also a vocal part of the audience yelling for him not to do this. Danny doesn't seem to hear any of it as his eyes focus completly on Darling. He enter the ring and stands in the opposite corner from Alexander. The ref points to Darling who takes a deep breath and then nods once. The ref then turns and points at Taylor with a look on his face begging Taylor to say no. Taylor simply nods yes once. The ref hesitates and then calls for the bell.
The two men head to the center of the ring, and Danny slowly circles looking for an opening to approach. Alexander brings his hands up into a semi boxing stance and starts taking fake jabs at Taylor forcing him to have to back away to avoid the glass. As Alex continues to take swings, Danny is forced back into the corner. With nowhere left to go, Danny throws his forearm up to block a punch from Darling, and several long gashes are raked into it. Darling steps back as Taylor looks at the blood coming from his arm. Taylor steps forward again, and when Alex throws a jab, instead of dodging, he grabs it and grimaces in pain, but fights past it and levels Darling with a short arm clothesline. He tries to follow up with an elbow drop, but Alex rolls out of the way. Darling then drops a double axehandle to Taylors chest that opens several more gashes.
Taylor rolls away, but as he is rising back up, Darling presses the attack and catches Danny with a glancing blow that causes the blood to start flowing from his head. Taylor is still able to get to his feet, and wipes the blood away. Darling tries for another right, but Danny dodges and grabs him with a double leg takedown. Darling grabs onto Taylors back on the way down drawing more blood, but still hits the mat hard knocking the wind from him. Danny looks to capitalize by flipping over into a fujiwara armbar, but Darling is easily able to counter by raking his glass covered hand across Taylors leg drawing more blood. As Taylor rises Darling goes all out rocking him with multiple rights and lefts, keeping him off balance and drawing more and more blood.
Taylor is a bloody mess at this point, and the crowd is in a stunned silence, as it is less of a match and more of a one sided mauling. The more blood that flows from him, the more Taylor tries to keep rising. With each blow he lands Darling seems to become more and more disgusted. Darling lands a stiff right that nails Danny right below the eye, and he drops to the mat. For a moment it looks like he will try to rise again, but the blood loss has caught up to him. Darling looks to the ref and tells him to ring the bell, and thankfully he does.
Your winner via ref stoppage in 13:25 Alexander Darling
Immediately after the bell trainers hit the ring to assist Taylor to the back. Darling looks at his glass and blood covered hands and the cameras pick up him saying "this has to end".
CHLOE vs. CHRIS EVANS – OOWF DDT Iron Man Heavy Metal Title Match: Jack’s RulesRing announcer Robert Johns explains the simple rules for this match. No disqualifications, anything goes, the match continues until one of the wrestlers gives up or is judged unable to continue.
Iron Maiden's The Trooper plays and Chris Evans comes out, microphone in hand, in a “Chris Evans is God” t-shirt (available from the OOWF Shopzone) and Levis.
“It seems that for whatever reason I have been reduced to working with little girls with daddy issues. First it was LD's little girl, now this bitch. I don't know what she's thinking. If she thinks that I'm friends with Lisa, then she better think again. She's nothing but a no good skanky cu...”
Thankfully Evans is cut off as the Draculs swarm over him, beating him with Billy clubs. Chloe skips out and grabs Evans by the hair and run him into the ring post, and Evans begins bleeding. Chloe smiles and sends the Draculs backstage as she introduces Cubby to another ringpost. She rolls Evans into the ring and the referee rings the bell. Chloe reaches under the ring and brings out her barbed wire branding iron, and begins beating Evans with it. The referee tries to take it away from her, but Chloe threatens him with the branding iron, reminding him that this is a no disqualification match. Evans pulls himself to his feet but Chloe drives a boot into his crotch and he sinks back to his knees. Chloe rakes the barbed wire across Evans face and just minutes into the match he is a bloody mess. After a few minutes of punchy kicky by Chloe, Evans sweeps Chloe's legs and starts to pull himself up. He wipes the blood from his eyes and tries to mount an offense against Chloe and actually gets some good shots in until Chloe responds with a Greco-Roman eye poke. Evans is covered in blood but tries to swing wildly. Chloe slips around back and swings the branding iron as best she can with one hand and drives it across the back of Evans' knees and he drops to his knees. Chloe raises the hand with the cast on it high in the air, then swings in a sort of discus punch and hits Evans right in the face with that cast. Chloe drops to her knees in pain holding that hand, but Evans falls right on his face, blood pouring onto the canvas. The referee is stunned but Chloe stands up and tells him to start counting. She still holds her hand as the referee quickly counts to ten and waves down the trainers.
Winner by knockout in 8:45 and still DDT Ironperson Heavy Metal Champion – ChloeChloe continues to kick at Evans and officials move to hold her back. The trainers put a towel over Evans' head and carefully load him onto a gurney for a ride to the back.
BANNED FROM EVERYWHERE vs. IHOP – OOWF World Tag Team Title MatchIHOP is announced first and make their way to the ring and are booed loudly. Skurge shrugs t off while SYB is LIVID. He gets into an argument with an old man in the front row and challenges him to a fight, when the man stands up, SYB hides behind Skurge. They climb into the ring and wait for BFE. “Insane in the Brain” plays and Awesome Bill From Dawsonville and Justin Sane ride out on Drunkey and Drunkette while Ellie May From Elijay follows behind them on the likkercycle. They do a lap around the ring, then tie up the donkeys and climb onto the apron. The bell rings as they duck between the ropes and this one is ON!
Skurge and Bill start throwing punches and tumble between the ropes to the floor. SYB and Justin eye one another, then slowly circle. At the same time, both of them strike the Karate Kid flamingo pose, Seeing neither Joo-Foo or Justin-Foo will work, SYB points behind Justin and says “LOOK A GIANT KANGAROO!” Naturally Justin turns around, because, who wouldn’t? When he does, SYB nails the JERSEY TURNPIKE! Justin collapses to the mat in pain and SYB stomps a mudhole in him, then climbs to the middle ropes and flips the crowd the double bird.
Outside the ring Bill ducks a clothesline attempt from Skurge and lifts him up and drops him throat first on the guardrail, when Skurge pops up, Bill DESTROYS him with the MASON DIXON LINE! Bill slides back into the ring and sees SYB on the turnbuckle, gets underneath him and POWERBOMBS him off the turnbuckle into the middle of the ring. SYB howls in pain and rolls under the bottom rope to the floor. Justin gets to his feet and Bill grabs him and whips him into the ropes, then drops to all fours. Justin springs off of Bills back and sails over the top rope and SLAMS into SYB! The crowd pops big for this. Bill gets to his feet, but before he can do anything, Skurge nails him from behind with a clothesline that sends Bill to the mat.
Outside the ring, SYB tires to escape by going through the crowd, but they catch him and crowd surf him around the ring, SYB screaming threats the entire time. Justin points to the Dutch Announce Table and the crowd dumps SYB onto the table. Justin climbs to the top rope and hits the FEELIN FROGGY FROG SPLASH! The table shatters and both SYB and Justin are out of it. The crowd pops with a very appropriate HOLY SHIT chant!
Inside the ring, Skurge pulls Bill to his feet and whips him into the corner chest first. Bill slams into the corner and staggers backward and Skurge BLASTS him with a SUPERKICK to the back of the head. Skurge pulls Bill to the middle of the ring by his legs, nails a low knee to the groin, then tries a SHARPSHOOTER! Bill fights the move and almost reaches the ropes, but Skurge breaks the hold and repeatedly kicks Bill in the face, then pulls him back to the middle of the ring and turns him over in the SHARPSHOOTER!
Bill howls in pain and the referee is right there to ask him if he wants to quit, but Bill refuses to give up. He starts dragging himself to the ropes, and the crowd cheers him every inch of the way. After several agonizing minutes, Bill grabs the bottom rope forcing the break. Skurge holds the hold as long as he can, but finally breaks it just before he is disqualified. Skurge pulls Bill to his feet and dumps him to the mat with a BELLY TO BACK SUPLEX, then quickly gets up again and hits a Randy Orton backbreaker, then covers Bill, but he kicks out at two.
Outside the ring, SYB is somehow up first and grabs a chair and staggers around with it for a bit waiting for Justin to stand up. When he does, SYB charges at him with the chair, but the crowd grabs Justin and crowd surfs him to safety! SYB is LIVID! The crowd sets SYB down by some of the flea market tables. SYB charges up the ramp and goes to look for Justin. When he gets there, there is a man who looks suspiciously like Justin, but he is wearing a Duck Dynasty beard. SYB asks him if he’s seen Justin and the man just shrugs. SYB shouts an obscenity and turns to walk away.
Back inside the ring, Skurge is driving knees into Bill’s back. He pulls him off the mat and whips him hard into the corner and charges in, but Bill gets a boot up and catches Skurge right on the jaw. Skurge staggers backward and Bill explodes out of the corner and drives him to the mat with a BULLDOG! Bill covers, but Skurge kicks out at two. Skurge bails out of the ring and Bill follows, and soon they are hammering one another with broken pieces of the table.
Back at the flea market, Justin pulls off the beard and yells DOOOOUUUUUUUGGGGGHAAAAWWWKK!! A cloud must have passed in front of the sun because the flea market goes dark, we hear a banjo, the moo of a cow, the roar of a race car, a fiddle starting a hoe down and finally a shotgun being cocked and loaded. When the light comes out again, we see SYB lying in the wreckage of a cotton candy machine. The cotton candy maker is spitting out long sugary threads all over an unconscious SYB. The camera pans to the right and we see Justin Sane, also unconscious, having fallen through a display of Honey Boo Boo dolls.
At ringside, Skurge and Bill didn’t let the sudden darkness slow them down a bit. Both men are bloody and don’t seem to have the slightest intention of getting back into the ring. The referee starts a ten count and neither man even notices, he gets to ten and calls for the bell.
WINNER – Double Count Out in 26:01
"Monsters" by V Shaped Mind starts to play...
the crowd seems a bit confused, until the OOWF World Heavyweight Champion comes walking out. He is in his ring gear, as he has the OOWF World Heavyweight title over his shoulder. As he continues to walk to the ring, the rest of the Suicide Kings come out and follow him to the ring.
The boo's are deafinging, as he looks around at the crowd...Carter stops at one point and see's a sign a little girl has in the front row. It read's "Get Well Soon Jamie".
Carter looks at the little girl, nods to her and snatches it out of her hands. Carter looks at the sign, gives a mocking look of endearment, and then rips the sign in two...This makes the boo's louder, as Carter finally gets in the ring...and the Kings in tow behind. He immediately asks for a mic, as his music fades.
CC: So it seems that I'm not going to be on alot of people's Christmas Card list this year...You know, I was a bit shocked when I found out that our General Manager gave me a match with the IC Champion Mai Muyo tonight, and even more shocked it was for the IC title...
Now being me, I can't let this pass...so I accepted gracefully, and Mai, I know that your back there pacing back and forth, wondering if this was a good idea or not, getting encouragment from all the others back there, telling them they have your back...but it comes down to one thing, who will actually have it?
Now granted you've held that title for a long time, and it has been well deserved, but I feel that your reign is coming to an end, and it will end tonight. But before all that takes place, there is one thing I need to know from one man who has been very quiet...Alexander Darling...
Now Alex, last week, I gave the higher ups a challenge to you, and I have yet to hear if you have taken my challenge...I mean, come on man, it's your career for my title...and it's a major decision, but dammit man, give me a fucking answer...or are you afraid? Is that it Alexander, are you afraid that I'm going to end your career? Are you afraid that you will have nothing to fall back on? What's you wife going to think? Hell, what is the OOWF fans going to think? Their hero, the old man afraid...well...
Before he could finish, Mai's music hits...she comes out to the ramp, in her ring gear, sick of hearing Carter run his mouth...
MM: Now I'm not Alexander Darling Christian, but I'm done listening to your mouth, so why don't you have your friends get out of the ring, so that I can kick your ass all over it for Matt and Jamie!
CC: Mai, Matt Folz can't save you from what I'm going to do to you...
With that, he drops the mic, mouths something to the Kings who get out of the ring, and stands and waits for Mai.
Christian Carter vs Mai Muyo
Intercontinetal ChampinshipMia gets in and the ref calls for the bell, as she looks up at Carter, who hovers above her. Carter goes to tie up, but Mai is too quick and gets around Carter, and kicks him in the thigh...Carter winces in pain as she unloads another kick...and another...and another...all the time, Carter is hobbling a bit. Mai goes to give one more, but this time Carter catches it, and spins her around right into a massive clothesline.
The world champ doesn't look happy, as he picks up Mai...he already wants to end it quickly, and goes to set her up for The Final Testimony, but somehow Mai reverses it, and ends up giving Carter an arm drag. Carter powder's out to the Kings, trying to regroup. He doesn't notice that Mai is gearing up for a run off the ropes, and she jumps throught the ropes, crashing into all four members of the Kings. Mai quickly gets up and back into the ring, as the crowd starts to chant Mai's name.
The ref starts a 10 count...as Carter makes it back in at the count of 8. Mai immediatly grabs him on the match, and puts him in a headlock. Carter is laying on his stomach, as Mai sits in a position, she manages to get Carter's left arm between her legs, as she puts on a CROSSFACE...
Carter lays almost helpessly, as she is looking to make him tap, but Carter is too powerful...he manages to get to his knees while Mai still has the hold applied...he now has his base, and gets to his feet. Mai has no where to go, and lets go, just as Carter has her and connects with a powerbomb...both wrestlers are down, as Carter is still shaken up...he slowly butt crawls to a corner, where he tries to get his barings...
Mai now starts to stir and is now in the middle of the bottom rope . Alexis Darling gets to the opposite side, and gets on the apron, as the ref goes to her...she has him distracted, as Jason Allen gets a running start, and connects with a kick to the face where he lands on the apron (ala Roman Reigns move)
Mai is hurt, a she rolls from there to the middle, and Carter makes the first pin attempt. Alexis gets down, and the ref see's Carter's pin, only getting a two count. Carter looks at the ref in disbelief, and grabs him...telling him it was three. The ref stands firm, and tells him it was two. All the time he was arguing, Mai has recovered, and as Carter turns, he see's Mai, who connects with a running knee to Carter's face.
The big man goes down, and Mia struggle to get a pin. The ref counts, but only gets a two count. So both competitors have had a pin attempt, and Mai is wondering whats it going to take to beat him. Carter tries to shake the cobwebs and gets to his knees. Mai sees an opening and connects with a shining wizard. Carter goes down, and Mai goes for the pin...1...2...th....no, wait Carter's foot was on the ropes, as Alexis Darling puts it on there where the ref couldn't see.
Mai looks at Alexis and starts to mouth at her. Meanwhile Reyna Jr. and Allen are on the opposite apron trying to distract the ref. All of a sudden there are cheers coming as Miranda Williams and Texpress come down to ringside. Texpress grabs Reyna and Allen's feet bringing them both down, and brawling to the back. Miranda and Lexi start to go at it, as Miranda looks on for a second. She turns around and is met with a massive spinebuster. Carter seems to have gotten his second wind, and goes for the pin...1...2..th...oh Mai kicks out.
Carter can't believe it, and neither can the crowd. A this is awesome chant starts to spill. Carter goes to the ref, and has him in the corner. He doesn't realize Mai is in the opposite corner, looking to connect with the high knee. Carter turns and moves out of the way as she connects with the ref in the corner. She turns right into a Final Testimony! Carter has a smug look on his face and he grabs the referee and drags him over to Mai and Carter lies across her and demands he counts. One…..two……NO! Mai kicks out at the last possible second! Carter is beside himself. He jumps to his feet, and Lexie is at ringside now, Carter looks at her and Lexie slashes her throat and says “finish her” Carter pulls Mai up and lifts her for a DARLING DRIVER, but Mai slips off his shoulders and lands behind Carter traps his arms and hits the FLORIDA KEY! ONE……TWO…..THR…..NO! Carter rolls his shoulder JUST before the three.
Carter rolls to the ropes, and it looks like Lexie slips him something. Mai gets to her feet and pulls Carter up and he BLASTS her with BRASS KNUCKLES! Carter quickly ditches them, the referee never saw a thing. Carter falls across Mai, one….two…NOT LIKE THIS…..KICK OUT MAI……three. That son of a…..
WINNER in 33:41 and NEW OOWF Intercontinental Champion – Christian Carter
The crowd boos loudly as Reyna and Allen join Carter and Lexie and celebrate in the ring. Carter holds the title high in the air, then calls for a mic:
What you idiots in Slapout just witnessed was history in the making. You can say you saw the greatest wrestler in OOWF history, Christian Carter, become a DUAL champion……your pathetic lives now have SOME shred of meaning. <Carter looks down at the Intercontinental title and smirks>
You know what? Unlike that piece of crap there <pointing to Mai> Get her out of OUR ring <Reyna and Allen throw Mai between the ropes to the floor> Unlike HER, I am going to be a fighting champion, and there is no one in this company that deserves a title shot, RIGHT NOW……so ref, don’t go too damn far……that person is………ALEXIS DARLING. Ring. The. Bell.
<Lexie looks at the three Kings and slowly backs into the corner. Carter smirks and holds Reyna and Allen back, then turns and tells them to leave the ring. They leave the ring and grab chairs. The crowd starts a LEX-IE, LEX-IE, LEX-IE chant. Alexis slowly moves out of the corner with a look of hate on her face, she and Carter go nose to nose Carter says something to her and Alexis pokes him in the chest, and Carter…….drops like he’s been shot? Lexie falls on him and covers, hooking the leg hard, one…..two…..three? What the hell is going on here?
WINNER in 1:05 and NEW OOWF Intercontinental champion – Alexis Darling
Allen and Reyna slide into the ring with the chairs as Alexis gets to her feet, Carter is quickly up as well and the four stare tensely at one another, then Reyna and Allen toss the chairs out of the ring and the four of them hug! IT WAS A DAMN SET UP ALL ALONG! Carter hands Lexie the Intercontinental title and she puts it around her waist. Carter grabs a mic again
This is our damn world, we do whatever the fuck we want. Jamie got in our way, and now Jamie is broken. Mai thought she could stand up to us…..and now she lost all that mattered to her. We are the Kings, and one way or another, you WILL bow down to us
Carter laughs and the four share another hug as fans litter the ring with garbage and we fade to black.
Thanks for coming out and watching LIVE OOWF action! Be sure to check out the OOWF Blood on the Walls II PPV, coming to you Live! Sunday March 27th, 2014, from Chevy Chase, Maryland! And don’t forget to catch next week’s OOWF Mid-Week Mayhem! Wednesday, April 16th 2014, Live! From Sopchoppy, Florida. Did you see something you really liked? Post it here in the 2013 Awards Reminder Thread. Please join us for OOWF Chat on Wednesday nights! And be sure to check out the full OOWF Archive and read up on the 9-year plus history of the OOWF!