OOWF MidWeek Mayhem (03/16) Live! From Sao Paolo,

[BookerShark]

Chris Evans is seen standing in front of an OOWF banner.

First off, before I cut this promo, I need to take a moment to extend my deepest sympathies to the people of Japan. I may not give a shit about whether or not the people over there give me any deal of respect, but I learned a good deal of my craft over there, and I view Japan like a second home to me. To the people of Japan I say, Arigato, and good luck. *bows*

Now that I’ve taken that out of the way, there’s the little matter of my tag match this week with Darling and Folz.

I’ve heard Darling running his mouth last week, you know the whole deal, “Chris Evans is a joke, Cubby is a fraud, Stank was injured when I nearly beat him.” Same old shit, Darling. Same old shit, different day. Did you beat me in the past? Yeah, you beat me, I’m not gonna deny it. Back when we first faced each other, you beat me fair and square. And your matches in the past with Davin Moreland are legendary, I’m not questioning that, and I never have.

But all of that stuff that happened in the past, that’s all it is..., the past. Keep telling yourself that you’re still at that level of competition, Alex. Cause one thing that you can’t deny either is that I’ve stepped up my game way more since the first time we faced each other. And last week, you wanna tell me what happened? I forgot.

Oh wait, that’s right, I pinned you clean.

And on the matter of Stank, you of all people should know that a bum leg isn’t gonna slow down Lucas Mann. And you’re also forgetting that prior to that match, I went through hell taking down Stan Fulton, and I went into that match with badly bruised ribs, so I was at just as big a disadvantage as Stank was.

I’m so sick and tired of all the excuses that you’re spewing out, and dep down inside, I’m sure your protégé, Matt Folz, feels the same way. And he would say something about if, you know, he actually promoed.

Folz, if you’re watching this, do yourself a favor, and hook yourself up with someone better, someone who can actually still bring it. You’ve got the talent, the title, and one of the best winning records in the business. And after you see what Davin & I do to Alex, you’re gonna need somewhere to go.

You’d be a great fit with GFY, except for one problem: that being that Davin has so little respect for you that he won’t even acknowledge you by name, unless you count Fuck That Guy as a name. I figured after what happened in the match between you two last week, he would gain something for you after the way you beat him, but I guess I was wrong.

But then there’s that other side of me that’s gotta side with Davin. And that brings me to another problem that I’ve noticed with you as of late. You never cut promos anymore, you never speak your mind, you never do what you need to do to make an impact around this place, to make anybody actually give a shit about you.

I used to be the same as you were, all the talent in the world and nothing to show for it. But the fact of the matter is, I’ve changed, and I am well on my way to the top of this company. You, on the other hand, don’t seem to have much in the terms of motivation anymore.

Back in the day, we’ve had some classic matches. Neither of us ever gave an inch to the other, we left it all out in the ring, we were practically equals. But nowadays, out of the two of us, I’m clearly the better man right now. I’m the Onslaught champion, I’m the highlight of the night, I’m the one that these people really pay their money to see. ME! You on the other hand, you may be the Intercontinental champion, but you need a serious kick in the ass if you wanna get past that.

And next time you feel the need to interfere in one of my matches, even if it was for my benefit, don’t even bother. I can take down a past-his-prime Alexander Darling without help from anyone.

*fade to black*

75 hours

[BookerShark]

*Darling Locker Room*

Alexander Darling is watching OOWF-TV by himself and he sees the back-to-back highlights of Davin Moreland and Chris Evans talking about the big match this weekend. After Evans promo ends, Darling sits quietly for a moment and then starts laughing. And not just a chuckle, a full-blown out hearty laugh. It takes him quite a few moments to finally calm down and he looks around the locker room to find the ninja cam.

Alexander: You two...I have to give you credit for finally realizing you have a match this week. Davin's right in that I've been abnormally quiet about the match this week, but he's wrong in one aspect. It's not him who carries shit around here. It's me. It's Alexander Darling's back who is tired of carrying the slugs around here to new heights. It's Alexander Darling's back that's building the future of this company.

I've been mailing it in Davin...are you fucking serious? Wait, I already know the answer to that and the answer is no because you can never be serious about anything other than your own ego. Evans and Davin can both make these claims about GFY and Unforgiven and the fact is it's all bullshit. I'm never going to claim Unforgiven has had the success I envisioned, but the fact is I've tried to do what was needed to set this company up for the future. GFY has been about nothing more than stroking their members' own egos. And if thats what it was supposed to be, so be it...I'll move on.

Matt Folz, hopefully sooner or later you'll realize the right path and start walking it as much as I know you're capable of and hopefully it starts this week. But even if it doesn't, I no longer care. I know the very simple facts are this, I am still Alexander Darling. I am still one of the god damn best wrestlers this company has ever seen. And if I have to, I will go out there once again and show the world what I'm capable of.

Evans, Davin...bring your absolute best and please don't make any excuses. Because when you bring your best, and I bring my best and I'm the one standing tall at the end of the night, you might finally realize once and for all that there is a simple unfallible truth in this company. I am Alexander Darling, and well, you're just not.

*Fade*

[BookerShark]

Cut to Matt Folz's lockerroom, the Intercontinental Champion watching the 3 previous promos back to back to back and smiling.

MF: I suppose I should respond huh?

Hayden Panettiere(Sarcastically): Gee, I mean you've promoed so much over the past 2 weeks, wouldn't want you to completely lose your voice.

MF: Ok, I deserved that. You want to grab a mic and do your job, smartass?

HP: I'm Hayden Panettiere here with OOWF Intercontinental Champion Matt Folz, who this Wednesday night will team with Alexander Darling to face Davin Moreland and Chris Evans. Matt, what are your thoughts going into this match?

MF: First, I'd like to apologize to you Hayden, and those OOWF fans watching, for not promoing more lately, I can assure you all I won't go two weeks between promos again. 2nd, and most important, as someone who's also spent a ton of time wrestling in Japan, I'd like to send my thoughts and prayers to those affected by this terrible tragedy. Now, as to your question, my main thought is that I feel sorry for Chris Evans.

HP: You feel sorry for him? Why?

MF: Going to be damn hard for him to go up in a tag team match against two of the best wrestlers in the company with only the OOWF's version of Chad OchoCinco as a partner.

HP: You're refering of course to Davin Moreland?

MF: You're correct. Once one of the best in his sport, now aging, overpaid, not nearly as good as he thinks he is, but either too stupid or too arrogant to realize it. I see you're still refusing to call me by name asshole, so let me help you out. My name is Matt Folz, if you still refuse to call me that, I can suggest some alternatives for you. How bout "Guy I can't beat"? Or "Guy who just beat me at my own game"? I didn't have to cheat to beat you last week, I did it to prove a point: I can even do that better than you. Now, you aren't worth MY time, so hopefully this is the last match you and I are on the opposite side for a while. I'm not wasting my breath talking about you anymore.

HP; And your thoughts on Chris Evans?

MF: Chris is right. I haven't been speaking my mind enough lately, and that is going to change. But I have nothing bad to say about Chris, other than his choice of associates. I do wish he'd been part of Unforgiven from the begining, but nothing we can do about that now. He's right, we've had classic matches against eachother in the past, and the same will happen Wednesday.

HP: Care to address the rumors about there being friction between you and Alexander Darling lately?

MF: There is no friction between us. He occasionally has a problem with my mutual respect towards Evans, but that's it. We've been working out together in private all week, I can assure you we're on the same page and we're ready and able to tear the house down Wednesday. This will be a match that OOWF fans will never forget.

HP: Anything else.

MF: Nope.

HP: That wasn't bad, you should do that more than once a month.

MF (Smiling): You know you're only still here because I can't find a replacement right?

HP (Smiles): You like me too much to fire me.

MF: Got me there.

Fade, as a clock pops up 71 hours.

MF (Through a black screen): What the HELL does that mean?

[BookerShark]

*SFJ 96 has caught up again with Outback Jack, who is holding a bottle of Powers in one hand and a can of Foster's in the other, as the St Patrick's day festivity's continue in the Destroyitarium*

SFJ: I was trying to ask you about your match when...

*OBJ's eyes roll up again and Jack of the Hinterlands emerges*

JH: Brass Knuckle Kings against Drink and Destroy in a cage? Am I supposed to be frightened? I will have the two of you in a cage. I came into existence in a cage, in that cesspool they put us in when Jack and I were kids, before the others came along. We survived because of me. I was the one who felt no pain. I was the one who sent people to the hospital until Wally could get us out. Danny's a good wrestler, and I understand why Jack likes him, but the reason why we have an advantage in the cage is because of me.

[BookerShark]

*Fade in to an undisclosed location in Cuba outside a medical clinic, where we see El Lobo Sagriento WAITING~! patiently…

ELS: And I thought Mexican Time was slow. Ah, here it is.

*A Cuban Express van pulls up outside the clinic, and the driver gets out with a package…

ELS: Is that package for a Comrade Sharkoff care of a Dr. Cassaras?

Driver: Si, senor.

ELS: I can sign for that.

*Lobo signs for the package, waits for the van to drive out of sight, then gets in his rental car and drives to the nearest airport and boards a plane for Sao Paolo…

*FADE*

[BookerShark]

Davin Moreland walks back to his locker room with Angelo Barrios. The two hear noises from inside, Davin gestures for Angelo to wait, as he opens the door slowly. Ecosystem is sitting quietly on the floor, facing the back wall in lotus position….crying?

Davin: What are you doing here?

Eco: (laughs bitterly) Being nuanced. Would you like me to cut a promo on you?

Davin: Cute.

Eco: Davin, once upon a time, you told me you wanted to help me. A lot has changed since then, much of my own doing, but I’d appreciate you hearing me out for a minute.

Davin: That’s not all it is.

Eco: You’re right. (Eco gestures to his right hand, holding a container.) I also have a canister of tear gas. So do me the courtesy of listening.

Davin motions for Angelo to leave, and then steps aside.

Eco: Silence frustrates you, Davin. But it hurts me.

As much as you demean and mock him, Tytan was supposed to be my brother, Davin. He was more than a mere friend to me. I thought I had someone I could really trust. And then he turns his back on me, not once but twice…the second time with no explanation.

He’s just one in a long line. Moose turned on me, back when we ruled this place. The Knife walked out on being my partner. Voltage snapped and left, and then left my side a second time in DEVILS. I spent months of my life trying to help Firewoman—drugging her as a last resort, when no amount of counseling or empathy could quiet her demons—and she rewards me by bleeding me dry, and then making a big show of her moral superiority by refraining from killing me in front of an audience.

You know what the worst thing is, Davin? I think she was kind of right. I think when you call me a fraud, you might be kind of right.

Davin: This is new.

Eco: It is. I just don’t know how new.

On Wednesday, Ash Wednesday, a holy day in the church I ostensibly belong to, I manipulated a little girl’s adoptive guardian into letting me punch her in the face, concealing that I would use brass knuckles, and injuring her so badly that she required reconstructive surgery that went beyond the thirty pieces of silver I gave as bribe.

That is, bar none, the worst thing I’ve ever done in my life.

Davin: You’ve been a sick man for longer than this, Juni.

Eco: Never against an innocent, Davin. What I did to you and your wife was reprehensible, but it wasn’t…you’re not children. It was horrible, but it wasn’t as…it wasn’t unforgivable.

I’ve done something that’s unforgivable. Not because Christ can’t forgive any sin, but because anyone who sinks as low as I have isn’t coming back out.

Davin, the truth is, I can’t really hurt you. I can’t give you a life emptier than mine. I’m a grown man, I’m in my early thirties, and I have never made a single real friend who hasn’t turned on me. The only people who have ever remained true to me…are my mother and my sister. How sad is that? And I don’t even see them, because I keep them away so they can’t be hurt--fat lot of good THAT did me by the way, given this week. Took me two days to get in contact with them back in Nagoya to confirm they were all right. Still, when I found out my mother appeared on OOWF-TV before my apparent funeral, I wanted to send her into witness protection.

Davin, oh goodness, this is going to sound so sick, but you know what it’s like to have the love of a woman. I had that once in my time here…and I wasted it, threw it away. No matter what I ever did to you, you’d have Samantha. Even if I killed her, cut her throat open and shoved this tear gas container straight down…you’d still have her in your heart, hold the time you had together close, know you were loved, know you could be loved, and perhaps spend eternity together in a different world.

Outside my family, I will never know friendship. I will never know love. I will only have business acquaintances. And you know Davin…

Eco gets up and turns around. We see he has made cuts under his eyes with a small blade, so that his tears mixed with blood.

Davin: What in the—

Eco: There’s something PROFOUNDLY LIBERATING about this. Davin, I’m cashing in what is owed me. I will rule this world, and as I stand up in my corporate tower alone, and listen to the howls, the gnashing of teeth, the uncontrollable sobbing…

…I will be sobbing as well. It’s the only way to deal with this world.

Eco approaches Davin with his blade and tear gas. Davin adopts a fighting stance, but Eco drops both with a loud CLANG. Davin is surprised, and Eco takes the chance…to hug him.

Eco: Good talk, Davin.

Eco releases and walks away, Davin looking after him and then wiping the tears and blood from his shirt.

FADE

[BookerShark]

Firewoman and Lucky are watching OOWF-TV. Lucky watches Fire get visibly shaken as she watches Eco's promo. She grips the sides of the chair and seems to be waging an internal battle.

L: Fire.......

FW: What the fuck is....what does THAT prove?

L: Who knows....He's insane.

FW: No, no he's not, Lucky. I know insane.

L: Davin doesn't need you to help him.

FW: I wasn't--

L: Yes, you were. Even though your concept of family is...well, I'm not sure what it is...but I know you don't like it when someone attacks them, unless....um.....

FW: Unless it's me?

L: Well, I wasn't going to say that, but now that you mention it....

FW: Funny....wait...rewind...what is that he said?......stop there!

Lucky rewinds until Fire tells him to stop, and we see this.

The only people who have ever remained true to me…are my mother and my sister.

Firewoman gets a broad, possibly evil, smile on her face.

L: So?

FW: I never knew he had a sister.

L: Fire......Alex isn't going to like where this is going--

FW: Alex doesn't watch OOWF-TV, so he'll never know.

L: Still....you aren't at the point where you can think clearly when it comes to Muyo.

FW: Oh, I'm thinking clearly, Lucky. Trust me.

L: I still shudder when you say that.

FW: Junichiro Muyo has a sister. That so sparkles with me. Get me my phone and get rid of the ninja cam.

The camera gets all snowy as Lucky 'gets rid of it.'

[BookerShark]

SCREEN WIPE to the aforementioned training room somewhere in São Paulo which Firewoman recently vacated. Stan Fulton’s personal attaché, Martha Rodriguez, is on her phone while Crusher is on the elliptical.

MR: “No, Señor theRick, Crusher’s contract states that he is allowed to take his own transportation twice during any one foreign tour and he can choose at any time to provide his own lodgings at his expense.

“Yes, the same contract agreed upon after Señor Fulton dropped the lawsuit against the OOWF.

“No, I agree that it was a frivolous lawsuit, but the contract is still binding. Speaking of which, thank you for putting Crusher in a one-on-one match this week.

“Yes, though we appreciate the World Title shot, it ended up as we expected with Crusher not involved in the decision. So we’d like to keep to the singles matches for the foreseeable future.

“Yes, Señor theRick. Good day.”

Rodriguez hangs up her phone and goes over to talk to Fulton.

MR: “Stan, it’s about time you did a promo for your match against Ecosystem.”

Fulton stops the elliptical and wipes his face with a towel.

SF: “If you insist.”

MR: “I do. That’s what you hired me for.”

SF: “That I did. Alright. No interviewer. I’ll take this one solo.”

MR: “I’ve set up the banner over by the free weights.”

SF: “Thanks.”

Fulton towels off and walks over to stand in front of an old-school OOWF banner.

SF: “Eco. Juni. Not so long ago I would have used this match as payback for what you did. Now I don’t care.

“I’m sure the whole of the OOWF will go on about my changing thinking and alliances and gimmicks and whatnot. But the truth is that I can only look at our match this week as a place to prove myself. Not only to the OOWF management, but to myself.

“You’re a good wrestler and a greater tactician. When I beat you in the ring on Wednesday night, it will only bolster my ranking and take me one step closer to championship glory.

“But all that stuff in the past? It mean little to me now. Right after I left DEVILS, I felt betrayed and used. Here I was, naïve and looking for guidance. You said you could show me the way to true glory and happiness. And in my naïveté I believed you.

“What did you provide? The equivalent of a Randy Orton duffel bag. A big pile.

“Now you’re telling Davin you’re all alone and no one loves you and blah, blah, blah. Are we really supposed to believe you? You are the most prolific manipulator this sport has ever known. The cuts under the eyes? Nice touch. How many minutes did it take you to conceive that ploy?

Crusher starts to look angrier and angrier as the promo continues.

“Well know this. I don’t care. I don’t care if you’re sad, lonely, repentant or even if you just want to burn it all down and piss on the ashes. I aim to beat you in that ring. End of sad story.

“And Fire? You still on Eco’s happy pills? Don’t stand against him or with him? Let’s just say I trust you about as much as I trust Eco. Which is not at all. So keep your mentoring to yourself. I’m not interested in anything anyone has to say. Most of the OOWF has claimed to be on my side at one time or another or said that I’m doing fantastic and my promos are outstanding and more blah, blah, blah.

“I’m still here at the bottom looking up. But I’m here every fuckin’ week. I don’t waltz into here once every four weeks, post a shitty promo and then get major titles handed to me.

“To quote a current catchphrase, I’m bringing it every week. Damn good promos. Championship-caliber matches. Remove the references to number of championships held and Davin could have written his promo this week for me. He’s said the same things I’ve been saying for weeks, but I’m a whiner and he’s the quote-unquote Greatest of All Time.

“Well, screw you all. I’m nobody’s bitch. I’m no longer anyone’s friend. I’m everyone’s enemy. I’ve had it with all the backstage politics and booking blowjobs. Maybe smacking everyone upside the head with my axe handle will get everyone’s attention around here. Certainly playing the game hasn’t.

“GMtheRick; you’re on notice. The bloodbath starts now. I’ll make what Moose and Alex did in Blood Pond look like Carnivalé. I will hurt people and then hurt more people. And then I’ll get to work.

“Sparkle this and you’re not that and cock-a-doodle doo my ass. Enjoy the damn, fuckin’ pain.”

Crusher picks up a free weight, a twenty-five pounder it appears and chucks it at the camera and we CUT to static.

[BookerShark]

*Fade in to the OOWF arena in Sao Paolo, where we see El Lobo Sangriento SNEAKING~! into Stan Fulton’s dressing room as the latter sleeps off his workout and angry promo.

*Lobo takes an oddly shaped item out of a box and places it on Fulton’s chest. An OOWF referee appears from under the bed and begins to count…

Ref: ONE~! T—

ELS: (whispering) shhhhh…you’ll wake him up.

Ref: (whispering) sorry. one. two. three. your winner and new OOWF DDT Iron Man Heavy Metal Champion…a prosthetic foot.

*Lobo quietly takes the DDT belt, TIPTOES~! out of Fulton’s room, HEADS~! to the local Hallmark store, BUYS~! a Get Well Soon Card, GOES~! to the post office, and MAILS~! the card, foot, and belt to an undisclosed location. In Cuba. I’m sure you see what’s just happened here…

*FADE*

[BookerShark]

*Stank is lying on a couch in his locker room with his eyes shut, trying to will his knee to stop throbbing with pain. Minutes pass before the pain subsides. Just as that happens, GM theRick walks in. Stank rolls his eyes.*

Stank - To what do I owe the pleasure.

GMtR - Get up. You got promotional shit to do.

Stank - What kind of promotional shit?

GMtR - Talk show.

Stank - Fuck that noise. My doctor told me to rest this knee and since I won't be wrestling this week I aim to take advantage of the time given to me.

GMtR - You are our World Champion and you will go on this talk show. Since you are so fond of pointing out contract clauses I shouldn't have to tell you that section 3 subsection b states that-

Stank - FINE Prick! When is this shit supposed to go down?

GMtR - It's Rick, asshole, and you got five minutes to hop in the limo outside. It'll take us down to the studio and we will wait til the interview starts.

Stank - We couldn't do this via satellite?

GMtR - Just get ready to go.

*Stank sits up angry. He rises from the couch and heads over to his locker. He grabs his bag and pulls out a pair of shoes. He puts them on and turns to face Rick.*

Stank - Alright let's go.

GMtR - Don't forget your belt.

Stank - I'm wearing a belt.

GMtR - Title belt, wiseass.

*Stank walks back, reaches into a different bag and pulls out his OOWF World Title belt. He and Rick then exit the locker room, exit the arena and get into the waiting limo outside. The limo exits the parking lot and out onto the main strip.*

Stank - Thanks for springing this on me last minute.

GMtR - No problem.

Stank - So what show is this?

GMtR - It's called Programa do Jô. It's hosted by an old guy named Jo Soares.

Stank - Wonderful.

*They ride on in silence for the next twenty-five minutes until they get to the studio. They exit the limo and are met by an advance team. The head of the advance team approaches and shakes both Rick and Stank's hands.*

HoAT - Thank you for coming.

Rick - Our pleasure.

HoAt - Follow this man and he will take you to the waiting room.

*Stank and Rick follow the man to a waiting room. Rick plops down on a couch. Stank chooses to sit in a comfy chair opposite the couch. A band of some sort stands at the ready to go out and perform. They are called and exit the green room. Stank looks up on the LCD Monitor provided and watches the band go out to huge applause. They set up and then from commercial break are re-introduced. They start to rock the house to great cheers and applause.*

Stank - They're not bad.

*The Rick simply continues to page through a magazine he found, nonplussed.*

Stank - You heard from Moose?

GMtR - Why would I have heard from him?

Stank - If I were you I'd be looking over my shoulder.

GMtR - I'm not worried.

Stank - Don't say I didn't warn you.

*The band wraps up their number to great applause. They exit the stage and return by the green room speaking Portuguese. A few of them light up cigarettes. The lead singer walks over to Stank and offers one. Stank politely declines.*

LS - I am big fan.

Stank - Thank you.

LS - You sign?

Stank - Oh sure.

*The lead singer grabs a marker and presents a brochure which Stank assumes pertains to this show. Stank signs the brochure and the lead singer holds it up and cheers excitedly in Portuguese. The other band members clap and holler and the female drummer walks over to Stank.*

FD - You sign?

*Stank looks up and the female drummer pulls up her shirt revealing two perfectly shaped, tanned, C-cup sized, boobies. Stank looks over at Rick whose jaw has dropped a little at the sight.*

Stank - Rick I take back any grief I gave you over bringing me here.

GMtR - Uh huh.

*Stank takes the marker and signs the left breast to the excitement of the drummer and the rest of the band. The girl hops around laughing with the rest of the band. The lead singer walks over and hands Stank their CD. Stank accepts it shakes his hand and the band leaves.*

GMtR - That was something.

Stank - Yep.

GMtR - You speak Portuguese?

Stank - I can pick up some of it here or there.

GMtR - Can you tell what they are talking about on the monitor?

*Stank looks up at the monitor and listens in.*

Stank - I don't know... I think they're getting ready to introduce us... something about Jo Soares doing a special show... uh... they're here all week... Alright stand up cause Jo is talking about the OOWF.

*And right on cue a stagehand comes to the green room to get Stank and Rick ready. Rick hears and understands the wordsOOWF GM theRick more words in Portuguese then he hears Stank's name and Stank's theme music fires up. The curtain seperates and the stagehand gestures for both Rick and Stank to walk out. Stank walks past Rick and holds his belt up high to the cheers of the crowd. A section of the crowd boos, but is mostly drowned out by cheers. Stank shakes Jo Soares hand and takes a seat. Rick sits next to him.*

JF - Thank you for coming.

GMtR - Oh you speak English.

JF - Yes fluently.

GMtR - Cool... Are they going to be able to understand us?

JF - Sure sure it is not a problem. First of all I just want to say what a big fan my children and grandchildren, nieces and nephews all are of the OOWF. I confess to not having watched your show, but I did watch some video and I would just like to show this clip if you don't mind.

GMtR - Go right ahead.

*A video package of some of the best matches from the past year plays on the screen. Stank takes his eyes off the screen and looks at the crowd gathered. He scans them all as they sit watch the montiors. He looks back up at the monitor and the package ends on him pinning Chris Evans and winning the OOWF World Title. The package fades on the image of Stank holding the title up high. The crowd cheers and Stank stands and holds his belt up. Once the applause dies down Stank sits and faces Jo Soares.*

JS - Very exciting. Congratulations on your victory.

Stank - Thank you.

JS - We have something set up for you. I was hoping you could demonstrate some moves for us.

*The crowd cheers as a ring is rolled out onto the stage floor. It's much smaller than an OOWF ring, but it will do. Stank smirks.*

Stank - Who am I to demonstrate my moves on? Should I pick someone from the audience?

*A bunch of people raise their hands wildly in hopes to be picked. Jo Soares interrupts before Stank can choose.*

JF - No perhaps you should try me out for size.

*The crowd applauds this decision and Stank shrugs his shoulders. He and Jo enter the ring. Jo removes his sports jacket and rolls up his sleaves. He mockingly raises his fists in an exagerated boxing stance. Stank smiles and rolls his eyes.*

Stank - I wouldn't want to hurt you old man.

*The crowd oooohs at this statement and Jo feigns offense.*

JF - I'll have you know young man that I was quite the accomplished boxer back in my day.

*Rick laughs from his position back at the couch. Jo starts to hop in and out punctuating each hop with a punch to the OOWF World Champion. Stank stands to his full height and folds his arms as Jo circles around the big man punching him to no effect save the delight of the crowd. Stank shrugs his shoulders again and without warning scoops up the 73 year old Jo Soares onto his shoulders for a STANK-U! The crowd gasps and some chant that they want Stank to do it. Jo laughs and pleads for Stank not to kill him. Stank chuckles and gingerly sets the old man back down on his feet. Jo pantomimes having a heart attack, then laughs and shakes Stank's hand.*

JF - We' o ll seja para a direita para trás com o mais do OOWF' campeão de s e comedoiro geral!

*Applause from the crowd and apparently we have gone to commercial.*

Stank - You alright?

JF - I am fine Mr. Stank. If you could stay for a moment longer we have a surprise for the crowd.

Stank - Okay.

*A minute later we are back from commercial. Stank and Jo are still standing in the middle of the ring.*

JF - I am standing here with the OOWF World Champion, Stank. Now sir you have a show here in Sao Paolo coming up on Wednesday, but you will not be wrestling, correct?

Stank - No. I will be a referee in a match to determine the number one contender to my championship title.

JF - Well we felt that maybe since you would not be wrestling on Midweek Mayhem, that you wouldn't mind wrestling for us... tonight!

*The crowd cheers and Stank looks over at Rick mouthing the words "Did you know about this?" Rick shrugs, feigning innocence.*

JF - This time we will bring out for you a more worthy opponent than myself.

*Jo Soares exits the ring and the lights dim. A spotlight shines on the curtain which seperates to reveal... *

FADE

[BookerShark]

*Davin is ON THE PHONE~! With who? We don't know. But I'm pretty sure you'll figure it out pretty quickly. You only get a one-sided conversation because...um...Brazil doesn't have Ninja Wiretaps? Let's go with that.*

DM: Fuck, I don't know either...It's Junichiro, it's almost always bizarre....Well, fuck, I don't know....yes, I understand that he's pretty much the entire reason you're up there....no, you can't come back yet....Because go fuck yourself, that's why not....oh, don't get all pissy now....are you crying? Why the fuck are you crying?....You're right, I apologize for snapping at you....I'll be honest, I've been thinking about it too...I mean, now that Moose is out of the picture, I can pretty much run roughshod over the OOWF, but it's just not all that appealing to me for whatever reason....I'm sure that's part of it....Ok, I'm sure that's most of it, actually....What? The Grand Slam Stuff? He needs to fucking check the clock on that puppy. Davin Moreland became Six-Pack Champion in just over 3 years, by far the fastest of anyone. Tytan needs to hurry his ass up if he's beating my record, and he won't....*sighs* I really wish you were around sometimes....There is a BIGGER REASON - listen, I don't want to argue about this, ok?....Ok....So about Junichiro, what should I do?.....Well, that's a lazy answer....I asked you what YOU think....Well, I thought it was a pretty big deal, clearly.....I need to have your "ok" though, Sammy....yeah....Ok, if that's what you think....Ok.....Ok.....I'll think about it, I promise....ok.....love you too....bye.

*He clicks the phone shut, and looks around for Moonbeam, presumably. He finds her watching "The Wall"*

DM: Don't you get sick of that movie?

SFJ420: Nope.

DM: So I have a question.

SFJ420: Like, I'LL ask the questions around here, man.

DM: Ok, Detective Moonbeam, ask away.

SFJ420: What's your question, Mr. Moreland?

DM: Well played.

SFJ420: I know.

DM: So I assume you saw the bizarre interaction I had with Junichiro not too long ago.

SFJ420: Yeah.

DM: What should I do?

SFJ420: Run?

DM: I was thinking of another direction.

SFJ420: Who are you? Sting?

DM: I'm not allowed to be a face.

SFJ420: Still.

DM: Point taken.

SFJ420: Davin man, I've known you a long-ass time, right?

DM: Right.

SFJ420: You've never, like, been a slave to what other people want you to do or whatever?

DM: Sort of my track record.

SFJ420: You're a human being, Davin. You have empathy, or even sympathy for others. Were it me, I'd run far, far away from Eco when he's obviously so unstable. You've seen what he can do first hand, right? But that's not you, is it? So maybe a private conversation on neutral ground in a non-threatening place wouldn't be such a bad idea. I know you want to help. But some people don't WANT help. Your cousin, for example. So inevitably, it's up to you what you want to do, Davin. But I know you, and I know what you're going to do already. You've probably already called Samantha, right? She told you what I'm telling you? You're the most predictably unpredictable person I know. Do what you think you should do, Davin.

*Davin stands there in shock, jaw dropped*

SFJ420: Oh, uh, like, totally, whatever, man, peace, love, dope.

DM: You're a good kid.

SFJ420: Thanks.

*Davin opens his phone and scrolls through the contacts...after a few seconds he makes a face*

DM: Do you know where my old phone is?

SFJ420: Yeah.

*She digs through some bags and tosses him another phone*

DM: Thanks.

*He scrolls through THAT phone, and apparently finds the contact he's looking for. He makes a call, and apparently gets voice mail*

DM: Junichiro, it's Davin...um, listen, maybe you and I should set up a meet somewhere...Just you and I....to talk....um...I'll be honest, I'm a little concerned about you - but if there's anyone you know who can get what you're going through....anyhow, call me back when you get a chance one way or the other.

*Moonbeam looks up*

DM: K. Done.

SFJ420: And now?

DM: We wait, I guess.

SFJ420: Wanna watch "The Wall", man?

DM: *sighs* Yeah, fine.

*Suddenly, before the movie comes on, Stank's promo comes on screen. Davin smiles broadly*

DM: Let's go.

SFJ420: You're fucking crazy.

*Minutes later, they're at the TV Studio. Stank is standing around, when suddenly "Extreme Ways" fires up over the speakers. The crowd goes batshit, because this can only mean one thing. Davin appears from the wings and gets the shit booed out of him, as he waves to the crowd. Stank has a bemused look on his face, and slowly shakes his head*

S: You know, somehow, I knew...

DM: Like it would be anyone else. How's the knee?

S: Good enough to kick your ass....RING THE BELL!

*The bell rings as both men have big smiles on their face. It's a back and forth affair, both men showing off their technical skills, the Brazillian crowd loving it. Eventually, Stank hits a Stankbomb, and locks in the Southern Comfort. It's only a matter of time before Davin taps, but Davin shows some insane strength to get out of it, to the delight of the crowd. Stank tries to press the attack, but Davin catches Stank with a REALLY GOOD DIAMOND CUTTER...well, almost. Stank shoves him off at the last minute and gets Davin on his shoulders in Stank-U position, when the bell rings.*

YOUR DECISION in 10:00....Time Limit Draw!

*Instead of following through on the Stank-U, Stank lets Davin fall off to the mat. He gets up and they do a staredown for a minute and the crowd is waaaaaay into it. Finally someone hands Stank his belt, and Davin claps Stank on the shoulder on his way back out to his car*

DM: Good match, Champ. I'll see you down the road.

*Stank has a pretty big smile on his face and the crowd in the TV Studio is loving life. In the car...*

SFJ420: What the fuck happened?

DM: It's not right to lose the title that way. Not right at all. Rick needs to be stopped.

SFJ420: Are you saying you could have won?

DM: I'm not saying shit. Stank's a fine champion. But that whole scene was bullshit. I'm just glad we got there first. You never know what might have happened.

*fade*

[BookerShark]

<Stank remains in the middle of the ring playing to the crowd a little bit after his match with Davin. After a few more minutes, the studio goes dark and "Raining Blood" plays. Stank takes a step back and looks around, GM the Rick goes white. He jumps to his feet and tries to run to the ring but gets cut down by Ketsueki Seishin swinging Happy Deth Bat II catching him right in the ribs. Ket stands over Rick and brings the bat down on Rick several more times, then rakes it across his forehead, once again busting him open. Stank stands in the middle of the ring, his arms crossed across his chest laughing. Ket finishes with GM the Rick and rolls into the ring. Ket moves to the middle of the ring, drops HDB and extends a hand to Stank. Stank shakes hands with Ket and Ket goes back to taunting GM the Rick.

It appears that there will not be a match after all, when more music plays, and the crowd looks around in anticipation. El Gran Mapinguary charges into the ring and attacks Ket from behind, landing several shots to the back of Ket's head sending him out of the ring to the floor. Moose gets to his feet, and Stank kicks HDB out of the ring to Ket, Ket catches it and BLASTS El Gran Mapinguary upside the head! He staggers back into the ring, right into a STANK-U from Stank! Stank covers, hooks his leg and a referee slides into the ring and counts one, two, THREE!

Stank leaves the ring and soaks up the cheers from the crowd. He and Ket bump knuckles again and Stank walks to the back while Ket heads out a side door. The camera pans back and forth from El Gran Mapinguary and a bloody GM the Rick as we fade to black>

[BookerShark]

J-P Sparxx and his girl Jewel are laying on the roof of the Sao Paulo arena, wrapped in some blankets after doin' the deed. J-P holds Jewel as they look up into the Brazilian night sky.

Jewel: Can we pretend that airplanes in the night sky like shooting stars?
I could really use a wish right now, wish right now, wish right now.
Can we pretend that airplanes in the night sky like shooting stars?
I could really use a wish right now, wish right now, wish right now.

J-PS: Yo, I could use a dream or a genie or a wish,
'Cuz therre ain't no place no simpler dan dis.
After dis match, the smash an' da crashin'
To take on Stank fo da fans an' the champship.
In da middle a da ring at Midweek Mayhem
If I lose, I might fade to da blackness.
But I'll make dat fatass tap
An' have that fuckah slappin' da mat.
Dat's just how dis match unfolds.
He ain't got da Moosehead's hand to hold.
An' all his plans unravel at ma hands
'Cuz all I need is one mo chance.
So I'll win dis match be'fo it's too late.
'Cuz it's ma time, ma time to be great.
I'll beat therre ass with all ma might.
An' I'll celebrate here, on into da night.

Jewel: Can we pretend that airplanes in the night sky like shooting stars?
I could really use a wish right now, wish right now, wish right now.
Can we pretend that airplanes in the night sky like shooting stars?
I could really use a wish right now, wish right now, wish right now.

[BookerShark]

(The man know as Ecosystem is cutting his usual promo during some House Show.)

Eco: Blahblah...blah....savior.....blah...blah..blah...take over.....sad....alone...blah...blah..blah....blah....crazy.....blah..blah..blah...

(Just then there is a yell and Ecosystem is cracked over the head with the shovel. He falls to the ground and we see Tytan standing over him.)

Tytan: Nice to see you didn't forget about your brother Juni.

(Tytan then pulls out a spray paint can and sprays "Lies" across Ecosystem's chest. Tytan then heads out to the ring and takes a mic. All to the mix of boos with a couple of cheers.)

Tytan: Juni, so you want to know why I "turned" on you. Why I left you lying in a heap AGAIN! I will tell you why, what I saw as Trinity and what you saw as Trinity were two different things. I saw it as a chance for domination you turned it into a joke and a chance to run around hand in hand with Firewoman.
I was feared when I first one the title. Then you came back and we formed Trinity. We were going to rule the OOWF, but you had other intentions. You wanted control, you wanted to have all the power. So, you drugged Fire and you made her do your bidding. I was tired of Juni I was tired of your little games. So, I played the game myself and I brought in Diana. Dr. Podvod was the one that helped Firewoman get off the medication we were turning the tables on you. Trinity was becoming a joke and you were taking us straight down to Hell. It needed to stop so I started the turn and then the rest was history.
You see before, you returned I was feared. No one knew who was going to get taken out with the shovel. NO ONE knew who's blood was going to get shed next. No one knew what truths I was going to shed. You said I did it because of those that cheered. That's so wrong. I did it because you are nothing but a liar and a fraud.
You are a fraud because you are just as bad as those that need the cheers. You need to be booed, you need to be hated, you need to be despised. But now people have figured you out, they know what the real you is. And you are just a piece of trash and scum. What you did to that little girl, you are nothing but the devil himself. Juni, you are not a GOD. You will never be, and I will make sure that whatever plan it is that you are getting ready to reveal. I will be there to stop you!
That is why I turned on you! There is the response you deserve you piece of crap.

(Tytan then drops the mic and rolls out of the ring and heads up the ramp.)

FADE

[BookerShark]

*A solid 10 minutes pass with Ecosystem, unconscious, and bleeding on the mat. No security comes to check on him. No medical personnel. No referees. And certainly no friends, fans, or other wrestlers. The crowd has long since stopped cheering Eco's beatdown, and now they're just feeling uneasy, as Tytan's music stopped a while ago, and no one is even pretending to check on Eco. It's pretty uncomfortable. Even Russ and Razz have run out of things to say trying to fill time. Suddenly, a figure comes down the ramp without music. Then 2 figures. The camera focuses in and it's Davin Moreland in street clothes with Fall River's Own Angelo Barros, in his ref's uniform. It's clear that Barros has no interest in heading to the ring, but Davin is, well, persuading him to go down. The crowd boos at first, but then they start cheering as Davin climbs into the ring, thinking he's going to continue the beatdown. Instead, he leans down and checks on Eco, looking for a pulse. He yells something to Barros and Barros hesitates, but eventually makes the "Dreaded X" sign to the back. A minute passes. 2 minutes. 3 minutes. No one comes out. Davin's face changes from marginal concern to pure anger as they wait for any response from the back. Davin grabs the mic that Tytan dropped a few minutes earlier.*

DM: Receba um médico do caralho e uma maca para fora aqui!

*Still nothing from the back*

DM: BEM AGORA!

*Finally and reluctantly, a pair of paramedics head down the ramp with a stretcher. They roughly put Eco on it and head back up the ramp. No backboard, no neckbrace, nothing. Just tossed him on the stretcher and pushed him up the ramp. Davin looks, well, exasperated, and starts talking again. This time, he's clearly addressing the TV audience, because he's speaking English*

DM: So THIS is what we've fucking come to as a company? Really? You've got a guy who just got shitkicked with a shovel, bleeding out on the mat, and NO ONE comes to help? Yeah, Junichiro Muyo is a despicable man. He commits deplorable acts of violence and appears to have little if any conscience whatsoever for his actions. He doesn't repent nor seek forgiveness. He is, for lack of a better term, "evil incarnate". But he's still a human being.

*This draws boos*

DM: REALLY? FUCKING REALLY? It falls to Davin Fucking Moreland to come out here and show him human decency? The most self-absorbed douchebag on the roster who would rather spit on you that smile at you? ME? You know, he did shit to ME TOO, people in the back. AND MY WIFE. In case you hadn't noticed, SHE'S NOT HERE ANYMORE BECAUSE OF IT. What about you Fulton? What did he ever do to you except help you? What about you Evans? Huh? What about Mr. President? Or Psykle? Or the supposed faciest face that ever fucking faced "Dynamite" Danny Taylor? Hmm? What the fuck are YOU doing that's so goddamned important? And what did Ecosystem ever do to you people directly? What about Chad and Zane, huh? I know what Fire did to you Chad, but I thought you people were fucking better than this.

*Crowd is silent*

DM: First Rick is too big for his britches again. Now everyone is so damned self-absorbed that NO ONE, from the interns to the General Manager can't be bothered when an OOWF Original is bleeding out in the fucking ring? FUCK you all for making me come out here. And FUCK you all for making ME, DAVIN MORELAND cut this promo. I've been in a war before. Hell, I damn near single-handedly WON the damn thing. Am I gonna get tested again? Am I? Am I going to have to round up my militia? You may not like the results of that you selfish fuckers. Let's face it. You all get paid as well as you do for ONE reason, Me. Not only did I bring sponsors years ago, but I generate so much damned money and interest in OOWF that you all reap the benefits. And this...THIS is how you repay ME?

*Crowd is still silent, having no idea what to make of this*

DM: Davin Moreland has been on the damned sidelines for too long. I'm done making it "about business". You people want to make it personal? Consider that shit ON, bitches. I'll make it personal. I'll personally see to it that I stomp all over all your careers and big-time you to the point that the OOWF will be referred to as "Davin Moreland featuring the OOWF". Is that what you fucking want? Is it? I demand explanations, and I expect them in the very near future. Because for the time being, you're all fucking frauds. That is, except Ecosystem, who's never pretended to be anything he truly thought he wasn't. Chew on THAT bullshit for a second.

*Crowd murmurs but is mostly silent*

DM: You are all on notice. Davin Moreland is done reading and reacting. I'm going on the offensive. And that means there will be plenty of rebar and clangy poles for anyone who pisses me off. So it would be in your best interest, in the words of Jeff Jarrett..."Don't piss me off". And that goes for the refs, and management, and SFJs and Fans, and anyone else who wants to step to the greatest freak of nature ever to hit a wrestling ring. You're on notice. You've been warned. There will not be another. Cock a doodle doo, motherfuckers.

*Davin heaves the mic as far as he can throw it into the crowd and leaves with Angelo Barros to all sorts of different reactions, cheers, boos, angst, whatever. All that I know is that it's loud*

*fade*

[BookerShark]

(Tytan hearing the latest of Davin Moreland's mindless rants gets onto the OOWFtron.)

Tytan: Well...well...well. (Tytan laughs) It seems that once again the biggest glory hog....the biggest spotlight stealer....the biggest arrogant asshole decides to do what he does best. Make sure the whole freaken story is about him. (He starts clapping) Bravo Davin! You manged to once again make it all about you.
(Tytan starts imitating Davin) Oh don't make me round up my militia....boohoohoo....he's a human being. He's this...he's that. I'm Davin Moreland and it's all about me. And no one else matters and I just talk a bunch of hot air and I love to hear myself talk.
For crying out loud Davin just shut the HELL UP. I sat on the sidelines for so long. Whatever! You have tried to make it all about you...every single time you could. What ever happened to the little bet you had with Alex? GFY what the hell kind of stupid ass name is that. Oh that's right you came up with it.

(At this point Davin has a mic and is about to speak.)

No, shut up Davin. We don't need another one of your ten minute ramblings that put half the audience to sleep, or turn to one of the other federations. Oh and the other half that is still listening is either drunk or stoned so they aren't paying attention anyway.


Davin: You know the hell with talking just get you ass out here.

Tytan: You know what I just might do that.


(Davin rolls out of the ring and grabs whatever clanggy pole that he could grab and starts to head up the ramp and is waiting for Tytan. The only thing is that instead of coming out the normal way Tytan comes in through the crowd. But still Davin is still quick enough to catch this and the pole and shovel meet and make a loud crash. So finally the two just lose the weapons and then begin to throw wild hay makers at each other. The crowd is going nuts and eating this up. But of course when something this cool goes on it never last. The whole security team comes out to separate the two of them. Words are still exchanged between the two of them and of course each one gets a chance to get a break from the security and get a couple of punches in on the other person.)

Finally GMtherick appears on the ramp.

Rick: Alright that is enough. You two need to stop it or I am going to suspend the two of you. I am trying to run a show here not a circus.

Tytan and Davin both shoot some kind words to the GM.

Rick: That's it throw the two of them out of the arena and make sure you throw them out from two different doors. If they want to fight let them fight outside so they can get their asses arrested.

(Security does what they are told to the Boos of the crowd.)

FADE

[BookerShark]

Davin Moreland is seen from the waist up in what appears to be the parking lot. He is walking towards a car, but in a weird up and down bobbing kind of way. Suddenly Dynamite Danny Taylor, also shown only from the waist up comes up from behind and smashes Davin with a stiff arm clothesline causing Davin to stumble forward. Danny grabs the back of Davins head and slams it into the hood of a car. He follows it up by smashing Davins head through a window. Danny starts throwing punches, well more accurately he swings his entire upper body at Davin over and over in a brutal beatdown.

As this madness continues, the camera pans back, and we see that these are not the actual DDT and Davin Moreland, but just the newest line of official OOWF action figures. DVD seems intently engrossed in his "parking lot brawl" play set, as the camera continues to pan back. The actual DDT sits nearby with Ashley, both have their heads cocked slightly to the side and looks of confusion on their faces.

Ashley: I think you kept him on top of the bus for too long.

Danny nods his head in agreement as the camera fades.

[BookerShark]

Alexander Darling is sitting in a coffee shop, somewhere in Brazil, reading a book. A stitched-up Ecosystem sits down at his table.

Alex: What are you--

Eco puts a Colt 1911 Stainless .45 Defender on the table.

Eco: Alex, I want to talk to you as someone who has a sister.

I don't want to see harm come to members of my family who have done nothing wrong. For the last seven years, I have protected my family for this reason.

I remember when Moose went after Spencer. That was very wrong, and I sent Moose a message after that.

Alex: (reaching toward the gun) Why are you--

Eco snatches the gun away and points it near, but not at, Alex.

Eco: Don't move.

Did you know Lisa is inquiring about my sister? She's sending calls in Japan to find out where my little sister is so she can hurt her to get back at me.

Alex: I didn't know--

Eco: So let me make this simple. She almost certainly will not find my sister, because no one I was ever involved with knows who my family was, and even if Lisa has seen my mother, she won't be able to find her just from that.

However.

If she does, and she hurts my sister, I promise you, I will put a bullet in her brain, and then to close the cycle, perhaps a bullet through my own.

I don't mean "I'll kill her" in the OOWF sense. I mean, I will shoot her through the head, and perhaps the heart, and she will not be alive anymore. And I would be willing to die to see her dead. Is that clear?

Eco's hand with the gun starts shaking.

Alex: Juni...listen to me...you're not thinking clearly.

Eco: Will you talk to her?

Alex: You don't give me instructions. At any moment, I could have taken that gun from you.

Eco: Maybe. Maybe you could. I don't...I don't even...as...as a brother, can you...can you just talk to her?

Alex: ...we'll talk. I promise nothing.

Eco: That's okay. I already promised what I had to promise.

Eco gets up and walks away.

FADE

[BookerShark]

~~~ Zane Myers sits alone at Ric's Sandwich Shoppe (tm) eating a footlong Turkey Ham & Swiss when he is approached by a Randomly Numbered Sexy Female Journalist. Zane doesn't eve look up as she begins to talk ~~~

RNSFJ: Zane, Can I ask...

Zane: Chad isn't here. I think he had a date. (looking up momentarily) I'm surprised you aren't with him.

RNSFJ: No, he asked, but I...

Zane: (smiling, but still not looking up) You were hoping that Lobo would ask you out this week?

RNSFJ: ..... How did you know? Did he mention me? Could you introduce me to him! WOW! That would be great! Ohmygosh I need to change if I'm going to meet him...

Zane: STOP! I've never even met him yet. And I'm certainly not getting involved in his personal life.

RNSFJ: Oh... that's cool... I mean. (wipes a tear from her eye)

Zane: For pete's sake.. quit blubbering and do your job.

~~~ Zane stands and looks at the ninjacam. He takes a long drink from his Aquafina bottle, and speaks ~~~

Zane: Kai, Aina, pick whatever match you want this week. The Texpress have shown that even though we might be the 'old guys' in this scenario, we can go toe to toe with you or anyone and win our fair share of matches along the way. No matter what kind of match we're in, We are The Measuring Stick. The question is, do you..

RNSFJ: Measure up? That's what you were gonna say isn't it?

~~~ Zane shakes his head, takes his seat and resumes eating his sandwich as we fade....~~~

[BookerShark]

Ecosystem is walking back to his limo when he is approached by The President.

President: Junichiro! There you aqre. I'm quite apologetic that I was indisposed earlier; I was off-site, writing a tract against entry into the League of Nations.

Eco: It's fine. Davin took care of it...which is weird. But yeah, I wasn't actually knocked that bad...just in enough pain that I didn't feel like getting up...

President: Look, "what we need now is not heroics, but healing." Are you sure you don't need a night in hospital?

Eco: President Warren G. Harding? Really?

President: No one better than I to talk to you about friendship. “Only solitary men know the full joys of friendship. Others have their family; but to a solitary and an exile his friends are everything.”

Eco: Your point?

President: Don't undervalue having your family. You're too social a man, in your own way, to be an exile. But their love, even from afar, even uncontacted, is deeper than what you'd receive even from the perfect friend.

Eco: Understand. (Eco gets into the driver's side of the limo.) Hop in.

President: (Climbing in) Where are we going?

Eco: We're going to take all the leftover drugs I had for Fire and see if we can get a part-time job with TNA.

President: (laughing) “I have no trouble with my enemies. I can take care of my enemies in a fight. But my friends, my damned friends, they're the ones who keep me walking the floor at nights!”

Eco's phone buzzes. He sees a text from Moreland, responds quickly off camera, and puts the phone away. The limo drives off.

FADE

[BookerShark]

(Tytan is seen in some dark run down Brazilian gym. He has the shovel with him. The random ninjacam catches up with him.)

Tytan: It's funny the more things change the more things stay the same. Well here we are Ecosystem is about to launch another cluster fuck attempt at "World Domination" and it may even look like Davin is trying to get back in bed with him so he can take it over and run it into the ground. It's funny Davin, the thing that makes the most sense is that the two of you are perfect for each other. You both need the crowd even though you won't admit it. You both have egos that are bigger then Brazil and have no clue how to control them. And you both claim that the rest of the OOWF is fakes and frauds when the two of you are the biggest frauds of them all. In fact the two of you are so alike I am surprised that neither of you have actually noticed it.
But seriously, what ever it is you have planned Eco just know one thing. I will be there. I have destroyed everything that you have tried to create. Well with the exception of Scrambled Eggs the Devils or what ever their name became. Davin's ability to not even lead people out of a wet paper bag did a lot in destroying that. But the biggest thing is I have killed you once, and I have also left you lying in the middle of the ring on more then one occasion there is no reason I can't do that again.
And as far as you Davin, the only reason I interrupted your latest boring ass rant (Tytan then goes into Davin's voice.) How great I am and the rest of the OOWF sucks and how you need me and my head is way to big for my body and blah...blah...blah...zzzzzz. (Tytan sits their and looks like he is asleep.) No wonder Firewoman stayed on those drugs for as long as she did. She didn't have to be awake to hear you go on....and...on.
But Mayhem it's simple the only two people I have some respect for in that ring is LD and then the Champ. Now, champ you said you were going to call it down the middle. You don't I have a shovel with your name on it. LD our matches have been pretty even. Mayhem that ends and I win and get my shot back at the title.
So before I start doing a Davin let me get out of here. See you at Mayhem and Eco always be looking over your shoulder. You never know when I will show up again.

(FADE)

[BookerShark]

Penthouse Room, a hotel, somewhere the fuck in Brazil.

The President is pacing back and forth inside the spacious penthouse room secured for himself, Nicole, Eco, and Commander Jackson. The latter two are not there and Nicole is sitting on the massive bed, camera in hand, watching the President and biting her lip nervously. He is gesturing wildly, as if giving a soundless speech to thin air, slamming one fist into an open palm or making big sweeping motions. His formerly finely pressed suit is now ruffled, the tie loose and hanging. He finally stops, glaring into a floor-to-ceiling mirror, and taps a button on his earpiece.

President: Nicole.

After a moment, her cell phone goes off and she sighs.

Nicole: I'm right here Mr. President.

The President blinks, then turns to face her.

President: Oh good. Set that camera down and put the timer on. I'm ready, and you're going to be in this promo too. Just don't say anything. At all.

She nods, complying, while the President waits, gritting his teeth. She situates everything and heads over, standing warily next to the President. When the red light turns on, the President speaks, glaring directly into the dead center of the lens.

President: Hello Firewoman, and congratulations. I didn't think it would be possible to divert my energies from the egregious miscarriage of justice committed by our general manager....I mean seriously, that biker moron in a match with a title shot at stake while I'm out slumming it with the likes of you...but you've done it. Pat yourself on the back; you've earned my attention.

The President takes a few steps toward the camera.

President: Do you think my partner and I don't speak to one another? Do you think he wouldn't mention a psychopath with a vendetta getting wind of possible family of his? And do you think the implications of that would go unnoticed?

He takes a deep breath, eyes closed. After a moment he opens them again.

President: I want you to take a look at someone, Firewoman. He steps aside and motions to Nicole, who looks pensive. This is Nicole Briscoe. She is charming, intelligent, breathtakingly beautiful, talented beyond measure, and is everything as a woman that you are NOT. Nicole gapes at the President wide-eyed. I paid you no mind before, as you were a part of Eco's business. No more. You are a wretched, lowlife, deranged psycho who deserves to be in jail instead of earning a living. Your mind is cracked. Your psyche is batshit insane. You are a danger to yourself, your family....I won't say your friends because any you used to have you've run off...your co-workers, and any innocents that happen to be near you.

He steps toward the camera again, eyes narrowed and spittle flying as he scowls.

President: So whether intentional or not, you simply possessing any knowledge about potential family of Ecosystem is taken as a threat to their physical security. He may find you first but if he doesn't, I get you in the ring. WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I AM GOING TO LET YOUR CRIMINAL BEHAVIOR SLIDE?! For YEARS, I have dealt with attacks upon my beloved wife Rachel. Dealt with sluggards who try to kill me. Fought against corrupt, good ol' boy politics and administration. A violent scum-of-the-earth nothing like you is nothing next to that. And you've brought my focus solely onto you.

He begins pointing at the camera with his right index finger.

President: This is now BEYOND a match. I was content simply taking the pinfall, NO MORE. I demand BLOOD. I demand your PAIN. If by some amazing fluke you get past my skills and training on the mat and win, doesn't matter to me. There will be no more drama, no more trail of tears from you; you WILL NOT walk away from that ring under your own power. You WILL NOT be allowed to stand when I am done. Because you can not be allowed to mingle with the rest of society any longer. Eco tried to save you; I am going to put you DOWN, in order to save everyone else. So enjoy your DVDs and whatever the hell it is escaped mental patients like yourself do. The danger your continued existence presents will come to an end on Wednesday. See you then, darling.

The President moves to kick the camera dead in the lens but Nicole hits a button on the remote she kept in her pocket and the camera stops recording. Silence overtakes the room as the President stands, head down and eyes closed while breathing heavily, and Nicole is unmoving, unsure, more than a little afraid. After a few moments, he looks over to her and asks the time. She informs him, and he nods.

President: We are going to need to go pick up Eco soon. Go get the limo...I'm going to calm down a bit, then meet you guys down there. Just gotta work all this emotion and energy off.

She nods and makes a hasty exit. The President heads over to the bathroom, but stops by the door. With a sudden snarl, he begins throwing heavy haymakers at the door, punctuating each punch with a guttural scream.

President: I. WILL. PUT. OUT. THE. FIRE.

FADE

[BookerShark]

*Davin, Shawn Johnson and Moonbeam are all watching Tytan's promo on OOWF-TV. They're all a little surprised.*

DM: I've never admitted I need the crowd?

SFJ420: I thought you were like, totally the king of pandering, man.

DM: I thought so too. Yeah, I don't have uncomfortable-to-watch talks with 5-year-olds on the way to the ring, but the fans sign my paychecks. They can love me, they can hate me, but they're all here to SEE. ME. See Balloonhead, that's the difference between you and I. You're a 2-Time World Champ that absolutely no one gives a shit about. If you left OOWF tomorrow, no one would notice. Except maybe Junichiro. But he's fucking crazy and thinks you're his brother or some shit. When I don't promo for 3 days, the internet goes crazy. There's picketing and mass protests with signs that say "Free Davin". That right there is the difference between a JAG, and The GOAT.

OGMSJ: And you can't, uh, "lead your way"...um....was it "paper bag"? I fell asleep.

DM: Which brings me to my next point. Team Davin in the war. Guess what, we won. Then we put Run DEA over, the prototype of all stables that followed. That's why "The Five" is always trying to remind people of their halcyon days. Because they know...THEY KNOW...that they're not original. They can't be the best. They can only match the greatness that was Run DEA. And look what I've done with GFY, will you? We're all champions. I've put two guys with raw talent and ability onto the fast track to the Main Event, greatness and immortality. Oh yeah, just like DAVIN MORELAND SAID HE WOULD.

SFJ420: I don't know why they keep doubting you, man.

DM: It's not doubting. It's hate. Haters gotta hate, so they hate what they know they can never be. Balloonhead can never be Davin Moreland. He can't be Ecosystem. Hell, he can't even get cult followings like Chris Evans and J-P Sparxx. No, he's doomed for all eternity to live in the obscurity shared by such non-descript performers as FuckThatGuy. Keep hatin', Balloonhead. Your hatred fuels me. It makes me stronger. And what makes YOU stronger, is now gone - Dr. Podvod and her cocktail of The Cream and The Clear. That's why no one respects you, Balloonhead. You're artificial. You're a paper tiger. People know the real deal when they see it - and it's not you.

OGMSJ: Wanna talk about your match this week?

DM: Why? No one else is. Moreland and Evans should dominate the overrated remnants of "Unforgiven" (Lou: Unforgiven), but hey - I don't book this shit. Knowwhatimsayin?

SFJ420: You've been hanging with Sparxx too much, man.

*fade*

[BookerShark]

(Tytan is still at the gym with the OOWF-tv going on. When Random Muscle head shakes Tytan awake.)

RMH: Hey, he's done. His talking really puts you too sleep quickly.

Tytan: (waking up) Thanks, doesn't he do that you too.

RMH: He doesn't speak enough Spanish for me to care so I tune him out.

Tytan: See what I'm saying Davin. They don't listen to you....it's just blah..blah..blah.

(FADE)

[BookerShark]

*Moonbeam comes in and puts OOWF-TV on, well, the TV. Davin looks up from his book and watches.*

Originally posted by fasteddie
RMH: He doesn't speak enough Spanish for me to care so I tune him out.

DM: *looks up for that part, then looks at Moonbeam* You know, it figures one of Balloonhead's Balloonhead Buddies...In Brazil...would speak Spanish.

SFJ420: I'm surprised they got out more than "grunt, grunt protein, weights, steroids, I pick things up and put them down."

DM: In Spanish.

SFJ420: In Brazil. Clearly.

*fade*