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Post by BookerShark on May 5, 2011 16:17:47 GMT -5
OOWF MidWeek Mayhem
Live! From Soyo, Angola
OOWF Intercontinental Title Match[/u]
Stan Fulton vs. DH Magnusson
Special Challenge Match - Davin Moreland Special Guest Referee[/u]
Psykle vs. Moosehead Jack
Onslaught Rules Match[/u]
Ecosystem vs. El Lobo Sangriento
Round Robin Challenge - Winners Get a PPV Title Shot[/u]
Regicide vs. Texpress
Stank & Chris Evans vs. J-P Sparxx & Alexander Darling
The Brass Knuckle Kings vs. Firewoman & The Flyin' Hawaiians
Drink & Destroy vs. TBA
Card subject to sweaters
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Post by BookerShark on May 5, 2011 16:27:21 GMT -5
*Ecosystem is sitting in his office, studying for some Yale exams when Eric O'Mac bursts into the room, clearly pissed off. An excited Gus Johnson follows suit.*
Eco: Hey Eric.
Gus Johnson: Hi everyone, I'm Gus Johnson.
Eco: So I've heard.
Eric: I've got a complaint to file.
Eco: Let's hear it.
Eric: Alexander Darling CLEARLY cheated tonight.
Eco: Um, OK. You realize this was a street fight, right?
Eric: Yes. He used a sledgehammer. Now, tell me, how many streets in Africa are you going to walk down and find a sledgehammer?
Eco: Good point. But I think the point of the match was that there were no rules.
Eric: You need to overturn the decision Juni.
Eco: I'm pretty sure there were no violations.
Eric:....OK, Juni. I didn't want to do this. But...
*Eric takes a seat and looks emotionless.*
Eric: ...I'll go to the papers if I have to.
*Eco's eyes get wide.*
Eco: You wouldn't.
Eric: Try me.
Eco: Which paper?
Eric: All of them.
Eco: No shit?
Eric: You know how I roll, Juni.
Eco: OK, well, let's not be rash here. I'm sure we can come to an agreement.
Eric: I want a match against Alexander Darling.
Eco: No can do. I've already posted the lineup.
Eric: And who am I facing?
Eco: Firewoman and The Flying Hawaiians.
Eric: And who am I teaming up with?
Eco: Well, Bryce Larson and...
Eric: Chris Evans?
Eco: No. Matt Folz.
Eric: Damn. It's ok. Folz is good too. He's getting me a giraffe.
Eco: Really?
Eric: No, I don't think he is.
Eco: Oh. Well, before you leave, there is the matter of your fine for leaving the tour and flying back to the United States without the express written consent of the OOWF.
Eric: Oh? And what is my fine?
Eco: I'm sure we can bargain. You don't go to the papers, and we won't fine you.
Eric: Eh, ok. But if something shitty like this happens again? I WILL be going to the papers.
Eco: I hear your threat loud and clear Eric. Good day to you, sir.
*Eric steps out to leave. Fade out.*
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Post by BookerShark on May 5, 2011 16:28:12 GMT -5
<Firewoman is sitting in the OOWF Café when Moose walks in and sets a coffee on the table and sits down with her. The siblings sit in silence for a minute, then Fire speaks>
FW: It’s going to get really personal between you two, isn’t it?
MHJ: <leaning back in his seat and looking at Fire> Probably.
FW: <shaking her head sadly> It always has to be a war with us, doesn’t it?
MHJ: It’s how we roll
FW: <reaching under the table> Oh! I borrowed this, came in pretty handy. <she gives HDBIII back to Moose> I really need to get one of those
MHJ: Doesn’t seem like your style
FW: Well……it’s not EXACTLY my style, but that is balanced nicely, just a little top heavy, but you could probably work a few of the nails out……
MHJ: No, you can’t take out the nails, that adds more to the weight. If anything you have to adjust the barbed wire, or razor wire, if it gets bunched up too much it slows down the aerodynamics
FW: True…..have you thought about balancing the other end? Like they used to do with swords, add a pommel to the end, that way you can keep the barb and razor wire and counterbalance it on the other end
MHJ: Hmm. I could add chain to the other end, that might be a good idea
<Fire and Moose stop and look around when they realize the rest of the OOWF Café has stopped what they are doing and are staring at them>
FW: What?
MHJ: They don’t get it. They shouldn’t stare at the Commish
FW: Yeah…..that
MHJ: You know, I don’t say this very often, I think the last time was when you were champ, but……I’m proud of you
FW: You’re……what?
MHJ: Look Fire……its no secret that if you have too much free time, bad things usually happen. When you took this position, I thought it would be a disaster, but you proved me wrong. You are doing a great job. Hell you might be the first Quinn with an honest job that doesn’t involve blood, drinking or whoring yourself out
FW: <trying to hide her pride> Thank you. I wish everyone felt that way <the pride is replaced by a frown>
MHJ: <considering his words carefully> Fire…….you know I haven’t said anything about you and Alex being married for a long time now. You know how I feel, and I know it doesn’t matter. But consider this, you just got done with one guy who was trying to control you, how is what he doing any different?
FW: <sits and thinks for a minute> Well…….it’s not EXACTLY the same
MHJ: No…….not yet. But you know how these things escalate. Does this mean something to you, the job?
FW: Yes
MHJ: Then you have to do what YOU want, not what anyone else wants you to do. You never listened to me, or anyone else, why start now?
<Fire grins at this>
MHJ: Ok, I have to run…..by the way, where is Lucky?
FW: <getting defensive> WHY?
MHJ: Calm down, I just need him to look something up for me
FW: Oh…….I think he is in my office, I’ll go with you
<The Quinns get up and leave the Café and the customers there go back to sipping their lattes>
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Post by BookerShark on May 5, 2011 16:29:49 GMT -5
*Fade in to the Incorrectly Adjectivized Nelson Mandela Memorial Arena, where we find El Lobo Sangriento FUMING~! in the locker room after yet another loss…
ELS: What do you mean, “yet another” loss?
*I’m just saying, you haven’t exactly been winning of late. You’re on an 0-4-1 streak. In a match sytle you’re supposed to be a specialist in.
ELS: First of all, stick to unbiased narration in the future. Secondly, only two of those losses were clean losses in Onslaught Rules matches. I’ll take the losses to Firewoman and Alex. I’ll own those. They were great, hard-fought matches. I’m sure both of them would agree that those matches could have gone either way.
*So you’re making excuses now?
ELS: No excuses, just explanations. And you know what, Voiceover Guy? I’m done talking to you for now. I’m gonna do that thing where I talk directly to the camera.
ELS: (to camera) Hey out there in OOWF land! Look, it’s been a tough few weeks for the Lobo. I’ve been beaten, I’ve been screwed over, and I’ve generally not been having a lot of fun in the ring. However, like I was just telling a certain Voiceover Guy who will not be named, I’m not here to make excuses. My explanation for my last two losses is this: the CEO is afraid to face me in a fair fight, so he’s messing with my matches to take me off my game. I can’t see any other logical explanation for his actions. I mean, he can’t actually want to win the Onslaught Title. The rules that go along with it basically go against the very fibre of his being.
ELS: So here’s what’s going to happen: I’m going to spend the week training for an Onslaught Rules match with every expectation that at some point before, during, or even after the match, the CEO will change the rules to cost me the win. That’s fine. Really. Because I’ll tell you this right now, Ecosystem: in the past two weeks, you’ve cost me the Trios Titles and a shot at the Onslaught Title. When we meet in the ring next week, I intend to get over my frustration by working through my warnings in a real hurry while I cause you some severe pain and suffering. After that, I’ll play by the rules and see what happens.
…
…
ELS: That’s you, Voiceover Guy.
*FADE*
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Post by BookerShark on May 5, 2011 16:37:04 GMT -5
The various members of Drink and Destroy are gathered in the Destroyatorium. They are drinking and chatting about whatever it is they talk about when the door opens. They all look to the door and are stunned to see...Davin Moreland, Moonbeam, and Shawn Johnson.
OBJ: *belch* That's Australian for what the hell are you doing here?
DM: You sent for me.
DVD: We did no such thing, I assure you.
DM: I have it right here.
Davin slaps a piece of paper. On it is his interview schedule, listing the Destroyatorium as his first interview of the day.
Ash: DH, did you request an SFJ and get Davin Moreland instead?
DHM: Hell no!
The doors open again and J-P Sparxx walks in with Jewel, wearing an unusually large robe and holding some cardboard.
J-PS: Good. Yas all here.
DM: YOU requested me? Here?
J-PS: Yeah, Davs. D&D are ma boys now.
DM: I'm glad you're making friends and all, J-P, but they have two lovely ladies that are perfectly capable of interviewing you.
SJ: Hey, Ashley, get me a beer.
Ash: You're not of legal age to drink, Shawn.
SJ: You know Angolan drinking laws?
Ashley looks at everyone. Spencer shrugs. Ashley pours Shawn a beer.
J-PS: Davs, since you ain;t active an' all an' since you ain;t done it in a while. Ima steal one a yo bits if ya don't mind. An' I figured here in da Destroyatorium is da best place ta do it.
DM: O...K...
J-PS: Ready baby?
Jewel: Sho baby.
Jewel takes her robe off revealing a barely there bikini, drawing looks from everyone there, even the girls. She holds up the cardboard as J-P reads along.
J-PS: It's time for... "J-P's Joke List"!
DM: Ah, my fraud list. Let's here it.
J-PS: Count wit me girls.
All: Numma Ten!
J-PS: Matt Folz. Fuck That Guy.
Davin laughs. Jewel drops the next card like a ring girl.
All: Numma Nine!
J-PS: Osama bin Fishfood. Enjoy the sharks ya bearded bitch!
Everyone cheers. Jewel drops the next card.
All: Numma Eight!
J-PS: The Chicago Bulls. Ma boys went in yo house an' punked yo asses ATL style, ya feel me?
DM: Uh, J-P. The Bulls won game two.
J-PS: Don't slo ma role Davs.
DM: Sorry, continue.
Jewel drops the next card.
All: Numma Seven!
J-PS: Stan Fulton. Da big man who can never seem ta stand on his own. ya teamed with that Raven chick and she fled da company ta git away from ya. Now yur wit Stank and Moosehead Jack, who...trust me...we'll get to later. Sad dude. Ya must like ridin' da bench. If dat's all ya ridin', knowhatI'msayin'? Let's move on.
Jewel drops the next card.
All: Numma Six!
J-PS: Alexander F Daring. We gotta team dis week. Don't fuck it up son, knowwhatI'msayin'?
DM: He will.
J-PS: Prolly. Top Five, bitches!
Jewel drops the card.
Spencer: Did he just call us bitches?
All but Spencer: Numma Five!
J-PS: Chris Evans. Pussyheart. Ya bitch, ya suck, ya moan, ya suck, ya whine an' complain. An' ya suck. Ya lose yur belt. An' ya suck. And from Shawnie here tells me, ya pop like a soap bubble. Can't please da fans. Obviously can't please a woman, hell, ya prolly can't even please yo momma.
Davin is rolling.
J-PS: I'm sho we gon' dance again real soon, homie. I'll show you what the Main Event is like, since you can't get a sniff. Let's move on th, thinkin' 'bout dis dude depresses me.
Jewel drops the next card.
All: Numma Four!
J-PS: Moosehead Jack. Don' git me wrong, you still a bad cat an' all, but ya said ya were gonna finish me off.
J-P opens his arms and looks around the Destroyatorium.
J-PS: I'm still here homie!
J-P waves his hand in front of his face like John Cena.
J-PS: You can't kill me. Then, I see you on yo computer. I was a li'l surprised you had one an' knew how ta work it. Dat girlies you chat with. She yur manager, girlfriend, sister... Can never tell with the Quinns.
DM: No kidding. We don't die, we multiply.
MB: BEBE'S KIDS!!
J-PS: Yeah, anyway. Whoever she is ta you, even SHE called you a pussy. Dat gits you on da list, knowwhatI'msayin'? NEXT!
Jewel drops the card.
All: Numma Three!
J-PS: The Boston Celtics.
DM: Oh Jesus.
J-PS: Ma boys LeBron an' D-Wade spankin' yo overrated asses. LeBron may have takin' his talents ta South Beach, but ya'll should take yo careers to retirement, knowwhatI'msayin'?
DM: I don't agree with that at all.
J-PS: No one says you was perfect. On to da next one.
Jewel drops the card.
All: Numma Two!
J-PS: Our boss. GM Ecosystem. Da boss is cheatin' over his employees. Ain't dat just like corporate America dees days? Lemme tell ya sumthin' 'bout me Bossman. I always had a problem wit authority figures, knowwhatI'msayin'? Usually it's cops, but you'll do. I like gittin' over on 'em, ya feel me? So you don' made the list, homie. Know what you git when ya remove da M from your title? Geekosystem. Yeah. Geekosystem Now, for da Numma One J-P's Joke...
Jewel drops the card.
All: Numma One!
J-PS: Stankopotomus. You will ALWAYS be numma one on dis list, foo. Run away from me as fast as doze chubby legs'll let'cha. You may think we're don' but we SO AIN'T DONE. The Spark's gon' git'cha Stank. Trust me on dat. Deuces.
All: Deuces!
J-PS: How dat, Davs?
DM: Not bad. Needs a little work, but not bad.
Jewel throws the last piece of cardboard towards the camera as everyone begins to talk amongst themselves.
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Post by BookerShark on May 5, 2011 16:38:23 GMT -5
*OOWF Fan Axxess at the newly constructed Soyo Open Air Soccer Stadium, where Midweek Mayhem will be taking place, Stank makes his way through the throng of fans, signing a few autographs wordlessly as he shoves his way through. He walks through the entrance where he is met by Justin Sane. Justin holds a cup of coffee out for Stank to take. Stank takes the cup and sips the coffee. Stank reaches in his pocket, pulls out a five dollar bill, and hands it to Justin who accepts it with glee.*
Stank - Alright. Where is our office?
JS - This way.
*Stank takes another sip of his coffee and follows Justin down the hallway of non distinction. Soon they turn left down the short hallway of executive privilege and into the administrative suites where a fruit basket sits on top of Justin's desk. Stank walks past it into his inner office, as Justin walks over and pulls away the plastic covering the basket. Inside he finds it full of watermelon.*
JS - MMMMM I LOVE watermelon!
*Chris Evans is watching OOWFtv. Bryce Larson is unpacking his gear.*
CE - Dude!
BL - What?
CE - You forgot to cancel that watermelon fruitbasket you sent to Stank?
BL - OH SHIT! I totally SPACED on that!
CE - Well you better apologize or he might get the wrong idea.
BL - Shit! What's he doing now?
CE - I don't know. They're filming us, now.
BL - What do you mean.. like... RIGHT now?
CE - Yeah.
*There's a knock on BKK's locker room door.*
BL - Oh SHIT it's HIM!
CE - Relax will you? It'll be okay.
*Matt Folz who had been sitting nearby quietly, stands and heads to the door. When he opens it, the OOWF World Heavyweight Champion is standing there holding the watermelon fruitbasket.*
Stank - Which one of you pricks sent me this basket?
*Folz and Evans both point at Bryce. "The Dragon" glances quickly at Folz then Evans, and then back at Stank. He shrugs slowly, and holds his hands up, smiling innocently.*
BL - Uh... You're welcome?
*Justin Sane is watching OOWFtv when Opus comes waddling into the administrative suites, followed shortly by Firewoman. Fire looks at Justin through her sunglasses.*
FW - Could you go get me a coffee, Justin? I have Lucky doing something else.
JS - Do you like watermelon?
FW - Excuse me?
JS - Stank got a watermelon fruitbasket this morning.
FW - Oh dear.
JS - He wouldn't let me eat any.
FW - So is Eric still alive?
JS - Why wouldn't he be?
FW - He sent the basket, right?
JS - No. I saw on OOWFtv that Bryce Larson sent the basket.
FW - Oh.
JS - I don't see what the big deal is.
FW - I guess I won't be seeing Bryce in our match next week.
JS - Why?
FW - What don't you understand?
JS - Rising oil prices, Celebrity Apprentice, Mango Chutney... any chutney, really... tomato, peach, mint, ullipaya, OH!... barrier reefs! something is UP with those. Lady Elaine Fairchild, Lady Jane, Lady Ga Ga, The Dakotas BOTH of them including Fanning. Tanning booths? Dog school, petting Zoos, Coors light, Lite Brite, Frost Bite, Cold Snaps, Ginger snaps, Parent Trap, Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson, Strudel...
*Moosehead Jack is watching OOWFtv on a nearby monitor in catering. Tytan finishes paying for his order at Flair's Sandwich Stand and Moose moves up next in line. He sounds off his order to the staff person running the stand this morning.*
MHJ - Bacon, Egg and Cheese biscuit. Two Coffees, one black, the other as gay as possible.
SP - Vanilla white chocolate latte with a shot of hazelnut, whipped cream, Caramel, a cinnamon stick, topped off with mocha shavings, and a cherry?
MHJ - Dial the gayness back a notch or two.
SP - Without the stick?
MHJ - More.
SP - No cherries?
MHJ - Just a caramel chocolate mocha.
SP - But you said as gay as-
MHJ - I KNOW what I said, but you're making me nauseous. I don't know how Fire can drink these things.
*The staff person proceeds to prepare Mooses order, when LD Williams walks up.*
MHJ - LD
LDW - Moose.
MHJ - Liked what I saw in your match last night.
LDW - Wasn't personal. Chad was just in the wrong place at the wrong time.
*Chad Madison is watching OOWFtv from Texpress's locker room.*
CM - Wrong place, wrong TIME? He's wants to be like THAT?
ZM - What are you going on about?
CM - Are you watching this bunk?
ZM - It's just talk, Chad. I'm way more interested in why we've been on a losing streak lately.
CM - Look no further than the bathroom mirror, my friend.
ZM - What the HAY is THAT supposed to mean?
CM - It MEANS...
*Chad is distracted by the sight of Bryce Larson stumbling by the open door of Texpress's locker room, covered in watermelon, and his head poking through a fruitbasket.*
CM - Don't see THAT every day.
*"Dashing" Victor Dinero is watching OOWFtv from the Destroyitarium.*
DVD - Looks like Texpress are teasing a breakup.
OBJ - It will never happen.
DHM - Why?
OBJ -
DVD -
DDT -
DHM -
OBJ - Because they're the measuring sticks of the tag team division.
DVD - Right.
*Noelani is watching OOWFtv on a nearby monitor in the Hallway of Random Encounters. She is flanked by Aina and Kai.*
Kai - Outback Jack gots jokes
Noe - He won't be joking if we can convince The Commissioner to join us and make a run for the Trios Titles.
Aina - You think she would really join us?
Noe - Let's go ask her.
*Firewoman is watching OOWFtv trying to ignore Justin as he continues to list the stuff he doesn't understand.*
JS - ...doughnut holes. They're NOT HOLES. They're just little round balls of fried dough. AND WHY ARE THEY CALLED dough"NUTS" anyway? They're NOT NUTS! Pizza hut, Supercuts, buttplugs...
FW - Oh gods! okay, OKAY, JUSTIN! I suppose it's my fault really.
JS - Buttplugs?
FW - NO! My thinking you could answer a simple question. I didn't realize-
*Moosehead Jack walks in the administrative suites interrupting Fire's words. Moose holds out a cup coffee for Firewoman. Stank arrives around the same time. He greets everyone.*
Stank - Moose. Fire. Justin, see if you can get a cleaning crew over to BKK's locker room.
JS - Burger King?
Stank - What?
JS - BK...oh there's an extra K.
Stank - Brass Knuckle Kings, Justin. I was talking about The Brass Knuckle Kings.
JS - You were just there.
Stank - I know. Call the janitorial staff and have them clean up the watermelon spilled in the hallway and in BKK's Locker room.
JS - What's Burger King got to do with anything?
Stank - Are you feeling well? What don't you understa-
FW - PLEASE don't ask him THAT!
*J-P Sparxx is watching OOWFtv with Jewel by his side.*
JPS - I don't why Stank-a-lank be frontin. His Fat ass know he be likin watamelon.
J - Babe... dat was kinda foul wut Bryce did.
JPS - Sorry boo. I didn't mean nutin by it.
J - Nah it's cool. Watermelon do taste good.
JPS - I know, RIGHT? Specially wit sum evaclear!
J - Oooh oooh oooh and DEN you mayunade dat bitch in sum pineapple juice and tequila!
JPS - DATS wut I'M TALKIN BOUT, BOO! Da Sparxx gon gitchoo, babe.
J - Mmmmm bring it daddy.
*Alexander Darling is watching OOWFtv. Alexis Darling walks up behind him.*
LD - WHAT the HELL are you watching?
*Alex is startled and whips his head around toward his sister.*
AD - What? Oh. Nothing.
LD - Didn't LOOK like nothing.
*Alex turns his head back toward the monitor.*
AD - Well it looks like they're filming us, now.
*Lexie looks at the screen.*
LD - Great. So what should we talk about?
AD - How about the fact that I'm partnering with Sparxx next week and he already showing me he doesn't have his head in the game. Is this all he learned from Davin?
*Davin Moreland is reading a newspaper with OOWFtv playing in the background. His ears perk up?*
DM - Did someone just mention the GOAT?
*Moosehead Jack is watching OOWFtv from Firewoman's office.*
MHJ - Fucking Diva. What a fucking attention whore.
*Davin Moreland turns from his newspaper and stares at the monitor playing OOWFtv.*
DM - Did Moosey Head Jackson just address the GOAT?
*Moosehead jack is still watching OOWFtv.*
MHJ - Yeah I addressed you, you fucktarded Diva bitch! You're no goat! Wrong animal. Try JackASS, punk!
*Davin Moreland puts down the newspaper and stands up wearing his "LD Williams is a Fraud" T-Shirt. He looks at the Flatscreen playing OOWFtv.*
DM - You KNOW what animal describes YOU?
*Moosehead Jack still watching OOWFtv.*
MHJ - A Moose?
*Davin Moreland is staring at OOWFtv.*
DM - NO!... but uh... your name does kind of ruin where I was going with this.
*Moose is watching OOWFtv... still.*
MHJ - Just MAIL it in per usual, DIVA! We ALL know that's how you roll.
*Davin continues to watch OOWFtv.*
DM - You know how YOU roll, Moose?
*Moosehead Jack turns his head toward HBDIII as Davin asks the question on OOWFtv.*
MHJ - No. Enlighten me.
*Davin Moreland smirks at OOWFtv.*
DM - Like a little, closet, faciest, facey, face, who ever faced a face... bitch.
*Moosehead Jack walks over and picks up HBDIII. He walks out of Firewoman's office as Davin laughs on OOWFtv.*
FW - So you're just going to... just going to walk out, huh.
*Davin Moreland is apparently still watching OOWFtv.*
DM - Where does he think he's going?
*Firewoman does not look at OOWFtv... but she can hear it.*
FW - I'm not TALKING to you, Davin.
*Stank is watching OOWFtv from his office.*
...
...
...
...
Stank - What... you want me to cut a promo after all of this? At least allow me to finish my coffee. Fade already.
FADE
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Post by BookerShark on May 5, 2011 16:39:30 GMT -5
*Eric O'Mac and Bryce Larson are SITTING~!!!~~!! watching OOWF-TV when the topic of watermelon comes up.
BL: How much?
EOM: How much what?
BL: Watermelon.
EOM: Huh? OH! WATERMELON!
BL: Yeah, how much did you sent to Stank.
EOM: A lot.
BL: A lot?
EOM: Um, roughly a ton?
BL: Nice.
EOM: Will he be mad at me?
BL: Nope, I took the fall. Apparently someone [Points to Evans and Folz, who are watching cartoons on a different TV.] got scared of the big man and forgot that you are the fruit distributor around here. It's all good though, me seemed okay about it.
EOM: Nice. Some people might think it's racist to send a black man 2000 lbs of watermelon. But if said black man actually loves watermelon, is it so bad?
BL: 2000 lbs?
EOM: A bit much, huh?
BL: Yup.
EOM: Well, thanks for taking the fall.
BL: No big deal. Did you get your match?
EOM: Did you see the promo with Eco?
BL: No, I was unpacking.
EOM: Oh. No match. Not yet, anyway. But I'm not getting fined for leaving everyone else.
BL: That's good, I guess.
EOM: You guess?
BL: Would the fine really set you back?
EOM: You're right. Fruit sales are great right now.
BL: As are shovels.
EOM: Funny that he thought you were in fruit.
BL: Yeah, which brings me to another thing. Remember our discussion over the last two weeks?
EOM: The rebranding?
BL: Yes. Rebranding SUPREME. I say we do it.
EOM: Hell yes we do it. I don't think anyone has said SUPREME in a promo in two or three weeks.
BL: Exactly. We do it. Rebranding is the new hot thing to do right now, and we are the best act in this business.
EOM: Let's rebrand.
BL: Let's inform Folz, Evans, Lauren, Maria & The Posse. Hey, maybe next time you can bargain for Eco to add in a rule the prevents them from always getting sent to the back.
EOM: I'll try that. [Yelling to the back to everyone else.] HEY! EVANS! FOLZ! LAUREN! MARIA! FRANCOIS! Um.... EVERYONE ELSE! GET OVER HERE, WE NEED TO TALK REBRANDING!
Maria: But I've never been branded...
*Fade out*
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Post by BookerShark on May 5, 2011 16:40:49 GMT -5
*Stank is drinking his coffee in his office when he points to a monitor replaying old OOWFtv*
*Bryce and Eric are watching OOWFtv from the BKK suites.*
BL - Oh... When did you...
EOM - Last week.
BL - Oh.
EOM - You don't read my promos.
BL - I read em.
EOM -
BL - Sometimes...
FADE
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Post by BookerShark on May 5, 2011 16:42:28 GMT -5
Ecosystem is sitting in his office, putting up a poster... when El Lobo Sangriento is ushered in by two Blackwater guards.Eco: Mr. Sangriento. To what do I owe the pleasure? ELS: Your muscle just dragged me in here. Eco: Did they? Ah, I must have had you on schedule for something. Let me go through my files here, I'm such a busy man, sometimes I forget the small things...John, put OOWF-TV on while I search. One of the Blackwater guards clicks the remote.Eco: Ah. Yes. That. Are you threatening me, Lobo? Threatening your employer? That seems somehow...inappropriate? ELS: No threats. Just a statement of what will be happening during the match. A preview for the ratings. You like those, right? Eco: Oh, very much. ELS: So let me ask you this, Ecosystem. If you're going to talk about "inappropriate," about the importance of ratings, how does it look to have the owner of the company come out and award himself wins and #1 contender spots week after week? Eco: You've hit upon it, Lobo. "Week after week." Not year after year, month after month, but week after week. If it's not played too long, it builds dramatic tension. I need not remind you I went 0-for-8 around and after I first became General Manager. This is my world, and the important thing is not winning every week, but being able to make the affirmative decision whether or not to win every week. ELS: It seems the decision is to cheat or lose. When is the last time you won a match cleanly in your career, Eco? Before or after I joined this company? Eco: (glaring) And that...that is the problem, Lobo. You're young. If someone is going to get the chance to strike me down, to a crowd of cheering fans, it's going to be our Randy Orton, not our Trent Fucking Barreta. You are expendable to me, Lobo. BEYOND expendable. ELS: Is that so? Eco: No one believes in you, masked boy. No one buys your merchandise, no one chants for you... ELS: And they do for you? Or can you rationalize it away because they all boo you so loudly you feel like you're getting a reaction, when they just want you to stop showing up on their TV screens, interrupting matches and stealing wins? Eco: SHUT UP! ELS: NO! There is a pause.Eco: Fine. Fine, Lobo. You've got it. Onslaught Rules, actual Onslaught Rules. No cheating, no adjustments, you against me. We'll see if you can beat me cleanly, and to boot, we'll watch the ratings and see if you can make anyone care. Or perhaps I shall send a note to Stank that we may need to do some Spring Cleaning, if you catch my drift. ELS: (standing up, brushing shoulder off) I'll see you in the ring, sir. And remember, "A gentlemen is simply a patient wolf." El Lobo Sangriento leaves.Eco: Did that fucker just quote Lana Turner at me? FADE
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Post by BookerShark on May 5, 2011 16:45:08 GMT -5
*Stan Fulton is in his tiny locker room watching OOWF-TV*
"This is going too fast. I've got a concussion. It's making my head hurt. But I'll say this to the wigger-wannabe with the porn star name.
"Hey, PJs. If you think I'm such a fraud..."
Fulton pats the Intercontinental title over his shoulder.
"... come and try to take this."
FADE
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Post by BookerShark on May 5, 2011 16:47:18 GMT -5
Firewoman is in her office, doing commissionery things. Opus is waddling around exploring the office, looking sad at her from time to time.
FW: I know, but I need to approve these invoices, and then we can play, okay?
OtP: *waddle waddle waddle*
FW: Looking at me with those eyes does not work for Alex and it is not going to work for you.
OtP: *waddle waddle waddle*
A caramel mocha latte appears in front of her.
FW: Awesome. And they are NOT gay.
MHJ: Not when YOU drink them.
FW: *taking a sip* Mmmmmm......okay you know what would taste awesome with this?
MHJ: Whiskey?
FW: No....got it! JUSTIN!!!
Justin comes in, bows with a flourish
JS: YES M'LADY!
FW: First, stop yelling. Second, stop calling me that. Third *she hands him $5* go get some Sour cream and onion chips, and some Velveeta. Melt the Velveeta, IN A BOWL, in the microwave, so I can dip the chips in it.
JS: YES M'LADY!
Justin salutes as he walks out the door.
MHJ: I don't know which of you is weirder...Him or you.
FW: Clearly, him. What do you want?
MHJ: *sitting down propping his feet up* You see Diva Moreland's latest request?
FW: I prefer to call him Douchebag Moreland.
MHJ: Either works. He wants an empty arena match.
FW: Oh, that one...yeah...it's.....*Opus opens a file cabinet drawer and pulls a sheet of paper out, bringing it to her*
OtP: *waddle waddle waddle*
FW: Uh...thanks?
MHJ: How did he....
FW: No idea...anyway, yeah, this is the right paper. *She looks at Opus and then back at the paper*
OtP *waddle waddle waddle*
FW: Yep, already approved?
MHJ: WHAT? Who the fuck approved that?
FW: Um...Lisa Quinn Darling....also known as me.
MHJ: Why the fuck would you do that?
FW: Because it'll be great for ratings. WWE hates anything resembling violence these days and TNA is all about violence for violence sake with no story line. This has both violence AND a logical build. It'll be fantastic. We'll clean up.
MHJ: But...
FW: Look, most of our PPVs suffer because they're the same night as one of the other guys'. This one...I haven't seen the schedule, but I'm betting people will buy ours, not whatever bullshit the other two are putting on...JUST for this match.
MHJ: I don't want to do an empty arena match.
FW: Well, too bad, because you are.
MHJ: *fume*
FW: Who cares, Moose. You don't do this for the fans, anyway, right?
Moose stands up, angry, glares at her, and storms out of the room. He nearly runs over Justin Sane bringing Fire's requests to her.
JS: HERE YOU ARE, M'LADY!
He both bows and salutes, and then leaves. Firewoman looks at the chips, Velveeta, and her coffee, turns pale, and then throws the whole bunch of things away.
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Post by BookerShark on May 5, 2011 17:56:45 GMT -5
<J-P Sparxx is walking down the hall gettin' jiggy wit it, or whatever it is the kids do these days, when a chair shot sends him sprawling on the floor>
JPS: YO DAWG WHAT THE......
<before he can finish, the chair gets slammed down on his head, shutting him up if only for a minute. The camera pans back and we see Moose standing there with the chair>
MHJ: So Sparxx, this is what we call an unexpected change of plans
<Moose sets the chair up and lays Sparxx leg on it, then leaps in the air and DRIVES a knee down onto Sparxx's knee, bending it in a direction nature did not intend. Sparxx howls in pain and grabs his knee. Sparxx turns pale and mumbles something we can't understand.>
MHJ: GOD DAMN! That looked like it HURT!
<Moose leans in so Sparxx can hear him real well>
MHJ: You know something Sparxx, words are a funny thing. I did say I would end you.......I just didn't say when. I damn sure COULD have done it when we met, but where is the fun in that? No.......I like this a whole lot more. Piece by piece.
Ya feel me dawg?
<Moose laughs and gets up and walks away as backstage security get to the scene and call for medics>
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Post by BookerShark on May 5, 2011 17:57:56 GMT -5
~~~ Chad, Zane & Bridgette are walking the hallways of the OOWF Arena, Chad texting away (presumable to one of the SFJ's) on his Currently Unsponsored cell phone; Bridgette and Zane holding hands.
They approach a corner and see Shotglass running toward them chasing a cricket. ~~~
Bridgette: Awwwww How cute is that little guy!!!
~~~ She scoops him up and holds him up, making the noises women make around cute puppies and babies. Shotglass seems to enjoy the attention, wagging his tail and trying in vain to lick Bridgette's face. Zane stops and takes a drink from his ever-present Aquafina Bottle. ~~~
Zane: We should take him to the Destroyitarium. I'm pretty sure he belongs there.
Bridgette: He's just so adorable!!!
~~~ She hugs the dog closely, his little tail wagging back and forth so hard it begins to tap..tap..tap on her arm. OOWF Senior Referee Davis Hightower passes by just as this transpires.. and calls for the bell? Winner and NEW DDT Ironman Heavy Metal Champion... Bridgette!
Hightower produces the belt and hands it to her. Bridgette looks around confused. Chad is clearly trying not to laugh and Zane just looks... pissed off, as usual ~~~
Bridgette: What... what was that?
Chad: You just won the DDT Ironman Heavy Metal Title
Bridgette: You mean.... the dog?
Chad: Yes ma'am. He won it from a Opus.
Bridgette: The Penguin? How did a penguin win it?
Chad: Well, you see.... I tripped and fell....
Zane: .... What this means is you're in harm's way.
Bridgette: Oh. I'll just vacate it
Chad: No can do. That title must be won or lost. Period.
Zane: What?!?!?
Chad: I read the rules while you were away. I've been DDT champion a couple of times now. You're champion until you lose it.
Bridgette: I... I don't want to be a champion.
Chad: Fine. Lay down
~~~ Zane smacks Chad in the back of the head. Harder than usual ~~~
Chad: Owww! What? I'm trying to HELP I kind of like being DDT Champion.
Zane: Lord knows why
Chad: Hey, YOU were even DDT champion once. It can't be that bad.
Zane: Only singles title I've ever held.
Chad: Not me. I've been Onslaught champion too!
Zane: Yes, we know. Why bring that up?
Chad: ... I..... I didn't?
~~~ Zane smacks him in the back of the head again ~~~
Chad: OWWWWWWWW! Stop doing that!
Zane: Stop annoying me.
Chad: .....
Zane: .....
Chad: Back to the point I was making before you began physically abusing me... Bridgette is DDT Champion. Pretty sure you want that belt off of her like... now. I'll pin her..
Zane:... No.
Chad: Ok, YOU pin her, whatever.
Bridgette: If you two would stop acting ridiculous for 3 seconds
Chad: Yes Ma'am
Zane: .....
Bridgette: Now honey, why don't you go get me a sandwich from Ric's? You know what I like.
Zane:...... I don't like this
Bridgette: Don't worry, Chad will take me back to the dressing room. Won't you Chad?
Chad: Of course Ma'am
~~~ Zane walks away slowly, making numerous glances backwards as Bridgette smiles & waves, while Chad stares at the wall. Once he is out of sight, She turns to Chad ~~~
Bridgette: Ok, let's do this quickly.
Chad: Uh... sure
~~~ She lays down on the hallway floor, smoothing her blouse and hair. Chad stands there staring blankly at her ~~~
Bridgette: Well? hurry up and get down here.
Chad: But... But I..... I'd have to like touch you and stuff
Bridgette: (laughing) This was YOUR idea!
Chad: I... I was really just making a joke.
Bridgette: We now you're stuck with it. get down here and cover me
~~~ Chad gingerly kneels down and awkwardly tries to get in a pinning position, but obviously is trying to avoid putting his body directly on hers.
After 20 dseconds or so, Bridgette just reaches up, grabs Chad and pulls him down on top of her.
DH Magnusson & Danny Taylor happen to turn the corner and walk by at that precise moment. ~~~
DH: 'scuse us
Danny: .....
Chad: (looking up) Uhh.. Heeeeey.......... Danny..... DH.. I... I can TOTALLY explain......
DH: Sure hope so, fer yer sake.
Bridgette: (Still on the ground under Chad) SOMEONE COUNT TO THREE ALREADY!!!!!!
~~~ Danny drops down and punds out the 1...2....3! ~~~
DH: Ring th' bell I 'spose Winner, and New DDT ironman Heavy metal Champion... Chad Madison
~~~ Danny drops the belt on the floor beside Chad. ~~~
Bridgette: Ummm Chad...
Chad: Huh?
Bridgette: You can get up now
Chad:Oh.. Oh yes... yes Ma'am
~~~ Chad pops up and pulls Bridgette to her feet. She brushes herself off while Chad begs DH for silence ~~~
Chad: Really man, It was just the title thing. She ended up with it, Zane doesn't want her hurt.. You believe me, don't you?
DH: I guess. I hope yer partna' does tho
Chad: You CAN'T tell him!
~~~ Danny does the "Zipper across the lips" motion ~~~
Chad: Thanks guys. I really appreciate it.
DH: Jus' keep yer business outta th' hallways.
~~~ Danny points at Chad and then holds his hand just above the floor ~~~
DH: Hav' ya seen the pup runnin' 'round 'ere?
Chad:.....
Bridgette:.... He ran through here not to long ago. Cute thing. Chasing bugs.
DH: A'ight then. We'll be seeing ya
Danny: (waves)
~~~ Chad and Bridgette walk back to their dressing room. On the way, they pass Justin Sane with a dogcatcher's pole, muttering "Gonna get My Title" over and over again. He passes without noticing the DDT Ironman Heavy Metal Title around Chad's waist.
They meet Zane just outside the dressing room door, carrying sandwiches ~~~
Zane: What took so long? (eyes his partner warily)
Bridgette: We ran into DH and Danny. They were looking for that cute little dog of theirs.
~~~ Fade ~~~
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Post by BookerShark on May 5, 2011 21:12:44 GMT -5
*In another part of the arena*
Moose is still laughing as he walks away from JP Sparxx and fighting his way through the crowd of medical personnel and security when one of the "medical personnel" goozles Moose and slams him against the wall. Moose swings wildly and the unknown man ducks under and grabs Moose from behind by the hair and slams him face first into the opposite wall. As Moose staggers with a slight bit of blood dripping down his face, the still unknown man hits a quick kick to the gut and then slams Moose with a DDT. We hear a sickening thud as Moose's head hits the concrete floor and the unknown man reaches down and starts dragging Moose around the corner back towards JP Sparxx. The man is making sure to keep his head down and out of the camera view for the moment. Sparxx is slowly getting back to his feet as the unknown man and Moose get closer.
Sparxx: Tomatah can?
Alexander: Be careful what you say around here?
Sparxx: You sayin' I deserve this homie?
Alexander: Not at all, but you run your mouth, someone's gonna make you cash the check?
Sparxx: If you tink that, why you watchin' my back?
Alexander: Because this week, you're my partner and no matter what else, I'll always watch my partner's back. And besides, I hate this fuck.
Sparxx: Won't yur boo have a problem wit this?
Alexander: Probably, but I'll take my lumps from her. You good?
Sparxx nods and Alex drags Moose up to his feet and whips him towards Sparxx...SUPERKICK damn near takes Moose's head off.
You know where to find me if you wanna train, Sparky.
Sparxx: I ain't Sparky, tomato can...knowwhatimsayin!
Alexander: I don't have a fucking clue...
*Fade*
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Post by BookerShark on May 5, 2011 21:14:12 GMT -5
Alexander returns to the Darling Luxury Suites, opens the door after a deep breath. Yes, Firewoman is there with her arms folded over her chest.
AD: Alright look, before you say anything you KNOW...I will ALWAYS come to the defense of my partner, whoever that is.
FW: You said you'd stay out of it.
AD: And I have. He fucking calls me out every chance he gets, and I've said NOTHING about him for WEEKS. But whatever, we're even now, it's over.
FW: You're a fucking idiot. It's NEVER over with him. EVER.
AD: *I* am a fucking idiot?
FW: Yes.....you don't get it....
AD: Then explain it to me. Explain how I'm supposed to just let my partner get laid out for no good reason and do nothing. I really want to hear this. Or maybe you can just talk it out with him over coffee.
FW: He's my brother, Alex...I'm going to have a relationship with him.
AD: So? He's a fucking maniac who tried to kill me.
FW: You tried to kill him back!!
AD: It was self defense!! Look, I'm not going through this with you again. I did it, I'm not sorry and....what.....what are you.......
Alex looks at Fire who has big silent tears rolling down her face.
AD: Wait...what's....why are you....are you..... crying?
FW: You just don't get it...I can't choose....I......
Fire is overcome with emotion and runs into their room, slamming the door. Alexander stands there, struck speechless.
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Post by BookerShark on May 5, 2011 21:17:06 GMT -5
Cut to the BKK locker room. Larson, Eric and Evans waiting around as Folz closes his laptop.
MF: Eric, I know you wanted one of those miniature giraffes to be the BKK Mascot.
EOM: Right, like in the Direct TV comercial. "Oppulence, I has it" Man I love that commercial.
MF: As do we all, the only problem is that miniature giraffes don't actually exist.
BL: So the one in the commercial.....
MF: CGI. Sorry guys.
EOM: Goddammit Folz, you fucked up again. I just asked for one simple thing and you can't even do that.
MF: Hold on, what the hell do you mean AGAIN? Remind me who took the pin last night?
EOM: Darling cheated.
MF: Clearly, he couldn't beat us without cheating, but still.... Also, I'm sorry I failed at trying to acquire something that DOSEN"T EXIST ANYWHERE ON THIS PLANET. True, I haven't looked into other planets in this solar system, but even on the off chance they do have some, I believe the delivery cost might be a bit more expensive than we intended.
CE: HA!
EOM: Stop using my line bitch. Fine, so the mini giraffe is out, anyone have an idea?
MF (Shaking his head, smiling): You 3 talk about it, I really don't care, I'll go along with whatever. I'm going to go take this call.
Folz checks the call id and smiles.
MF: Been a while, I was expecting this call. (Grinning ear to ear) Hell yes, I'd be happy to do it. Let me get rid of these damn ninja cams and we'll discuss details.
Fade
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Post by BookerShark on May 5, 2011 21:18:02 GMT -5
<Moose gets to his feet, rubbing his jaw and wiping the blood from his face and starts to laugh>
MHJ: You just couldn't stay away could you Little Alex? Your say you want nothing to do with me, yet here you are, sticking your nose in my shit......again. Sparxx had it coming, and if you don't see that, you are every bit as fucking retarded as I thought you were.
<Moose shakes out the cobwebs a little more then looks at the camera once again>
MHJ: I know what you're thinking. You think now I am after you. <Moose laughs at this> No Alex, I am not coming after you. I already beat you. I am done with you, I proved I am better than you. That little Legacy of yours? Your Legacy is getting your ass handed to you by Moosehead Jack. No Darling, I am not coming after you. But Sparxx? I am not done with him. You want to keep attacking, bring it Darling, there is nothing you can do to stop me, we have already proven that.
Sparxx, if you think this is over?
<Moose laughs and walks away>
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Post by BookerShark on May 5, 2011 21:19:08 GMT -5
Moose gets back to his locker room. He sit down, holding his head a bit. He hears another "bloop bloop" on his laptop. He once again sees a video chat request from "NipponGymRaven55". He clicks OK.
MHJ: Wanna call me a pussy again?
A'isha al-Takriti smiles on the computer.
Aa-T: Nah, that was good. J-P Sparxx never saw it comin' I approve.
MHJ: So what do you want?
Aa-T: I needed a break from the party.
MHJ: What party?
Aa-T: Ket, it's Cinco de Mayo...
MHJ: So? I don't care about some stupid Mexican holiday.
Aa-T: You forgot.
MHJ: Forgot what?
Aa-T: Cinco de Mayo is also my birthday, d'uh!
MHJ: Oh. Oh yeah. Happy Birthday A'isha. What's Poe doing for you?
Aa-T: It's a reverse Luau. Hula dancers dressed as zombies. No alcohol since I'm only nineteen. But I'll be drinking later, of course.
MHJ: Of course.
Aa-T: And we're gonna barbecue a live pig.
MHJ: Nice. Creepy, but nice. Enjoy your party. I need a nap.
Aa-T: You might have a concussion. You probably shouldn't.
MHJ: Darling wishes he could give me a concussion.
A'isha laughs.
Aa-T: Namaste, Ket.
MHJ: Namaste, A'isha.
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Post by BookerShark on May 5, 2011 21:37:01 GMT -5
Moose heads out of his locker room going to get ice as he turns the corner and sees Dynamite Danny Taylor standing there arms crossed over his chest.
Moose: You gonna do something, or get the hell out of my way?
Danny points to his mouth, then points at Moose and shakes his head no. He then points his thumb at himself and nods yes.
Moose: What the hell does that mean?
DVD steps over to the side from DDT.
DVD: It means words only hurt if you let them Moose, but Danny will hurt you whether you want him to or not.
As Moose processes this, Danny rushes forward. Moose tries to take up a defense, but he is unprepared for the rush. Danny gets the double leg and brings Moose to the ground. Moose starts throwing punches and a couple land solid, but Danny is focused and shrugs them off. DDT drops a couple of Forearms that land solid on Moose's skull rocking his head back. Moose tries to roll over to avoid them, and Danny gets his back. DDT locks in a rear naked choke and Moose struggles for breath. Moose in a show of strength starts to pull himself up the wall. Danny just starts tightening his grip. Suddenly Moose mule kicks (or maybe moose kicks) backwards catching Danny in the sensitive man parts.
This causes Danny to loosen his grip, and Moose gets a rake to the eyes. Danny lets go of the choke, and Moose grabs and smashes his head into a nearby in case of fire display. The glass shatters on impact, and Moose picks up a large shard of it.
Moose: I'm gonna cut your mute ass up now.
Before Moose can make good on his threat, a logging chain wrapped fist slams into his chin sending him to the ground. The piece of glass falls from his hand. He looks up and sees DH Magnusson standing tall.
Moose: Two on one DH? Not a very "facey" thing to do.
DH: This is not about face or heel Moose. This is about loyalty and respect, two things you like to talk about, but two things you don't actually do.
Moose: (slowly reaching for the piece of glass) Oh really?
Suddenly a boot comes down crushing the glass shard. Moose looks and sees Outback Jack standing in frame.
OBJ: (Belches) That's Australian for not this time Mate.
DH: You and your buddies attacking us after the match last week was not unexpected, but Sparxx coming to our aid was. We owed him one.
OBJ: And Drink and Destroy always pays it's debts.
Moose tries to get the initiative by leaping up at DH. Mags is ready for this and lands an uppercut shot that staggers Moose back. OBJ nails him from behind with a boomerang that sends him in another direction. At this point DDT has recovered and catches Moose with a kick to the gut and plants him with a Dynamite Drop! Moose is down and nearly out. The three members of D&D stand tall over him as DVD comes over to join them.
DVD: I told your sister this once, and now I'm telling you. There are consequences for your actions. Your days of walking around here doing whatever the hell you want without any negative effects are over. Eco may not want to take charge, but D&D has no problem with that.
OBJ: If you jump someone in the back, we come back after you. You stick yourself into others matches, we come back for yours.
DH: If you drag your running buddies into this, we will raise an army the likes of which this company has never seen. If the people in charge can't maintain order, WE WILL.
DDT mouths the word Boom as the group walks away leaving Moose laying.
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Post by BookerShark on May 5, 2011 21:38:24 GMT -5
As JP Sparxx is being tended to by trainers in a back room post-last fight, Ecosystem comes by and sits next to him.
Eco: Hi there.
JP: You--you really gonna pull this now, Geekosystem?
Eco: I'm not going to pull anything--though it appears you may have! Ho ho ho!
JP: Oh, you got jokes now?
Eco: Indeed. And that's all I done got. See, I don't come at you from behind, I don't jump you in the hallway. I'm face to face, homie. I'm not a fraud.
JP: (extending his leg slowly for the trainer, grunting) I neva said dat. I said you was a joke. Totally different concept.
Eco: Okay, let's talk joke. Who signs the checks, boy? Who makes the puppets dance? Who controls the media empire that--
JP: Who wins the matches without no help or nothin'? Who stands up for theyselves and doesn't hide behind no security guards? Who ain't got to buy themselves wins cuz they takin' em? 'Cause whoever that is...ain't you.
Ecosystem stops short for a second, then rears back and kicks Sparxx HARD in the knee.
JP: Muthaf--
Nurse #1: What the fuck?
Eco: Reflex. You'll get a little bonus in your check for workman's comp, Sparky-boy.
Eco storms out.
FADE
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Post by BookerShark on May 5, 2011 21:44:31 GMT -5
CUT to a camera back in the hallway. D&D turn away from Moose with DH out in front. As they turn, DH is LEVELED with an axe handle across the bridge of the nose.
As he goes down, Outback Jack attempt to strike at the wielder of the axe handle, The Crusher Stan Fulton. Fulton, however, begins using the axe handle like a sword and parries Jack's strike with a high block, sweeps his arms down and comes up and across from lower left to upper right (a beautiful Ja Oo-Lee-o BaeGee) driving Jack backwards.
Thinking Fulton is out of position, Jack charges back in only to have Fulton turn sideways to the charge standing on one leg. He combines that with a one handed temple cut, dropping Jack like a poleaxed ox.
Taylor, however, wasn't stunned and charges Fulton knocking him back into the hallway wall. Fulton grabs Taylor's head, bends it back and plants a vicious headbutt right to Taylor's cranium.
Staggering back, Fulton drops his axe handle and plows into Taylor with a HUGE AVALANCHE; Taylor crumples to the floor.
A sound behind him spins Fulton around. It's DH trying to get to Fulton, but Moosehead Jack is back on his feet unbeknownst to Mr. Magnusson. Moose intercepts DH before he can attack, spins him around and gives him an IMPLANT DDT on the concrete floor.
MHJ: "Raise your army, Mags. Raise nations. Raise the world. We'll bleed them all. All of them, DH! ALL OF THEM!"
Fulton and Moose walk away and around the corner as Moose's maniacal laughter filters back down the corridor as we FADE.
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Post by BookerShark on May 6, 2011 23:52:39 GMT -5
Firewoman has composed herself enough, and is taking a walk to try to clear her head. This effort is cut short as she comes upon Ecosystem and Sparxx. Ecosystem does the Shoulder Bump of Rage.
FW: Hey, watch it. *she spies Sparxx laying on the ground around the corner.* Seriously, Juni?
Eco: Just working out some owner/employee issues, Lisa, nothing for you to be concerned--
FW: Actually the welfare of the "employees" are my concern, since despite our 'card subject to change' disclaimer, I still have fans who bitch, and a board to answer to....
Eco: How interesting...you care...
FW: Get the fuck back to your office, Juni, or wherever it is you lurk until you remember to flex some GM muscle.
Eco: If I don't?
FW: I might suddenly get my memory back, and wonder why I've allowed you to keep breathing this long.
Ecosystem smirks, does an exaggerated bow, and continues STORMING~! Firewoman shakes her head and turns to where Sparxx is being attended to. She helps him up.
JPS: Yo, t'anks, Fire, I be--
FW: Getting your ass to medical...and Sparxx? Quit poking people.
JPS: Dat's not--
FW: GO!
Sparxx decides it's best not to argue. Firewoman continues down the hall, shaking her head.
FW: All I want is a little peace and quiet...is that too much to ask?
She turns the corner, and apparently it is, because she comes upon the members of Drink and Destroy walking toward the Destroyitarium. She sees Moose on the floor behind them and immediately goes from zero to rage, although she controls herself.
FW: Hmmm...Four on one. Yeah, that's fair. Oh wait *looking at Victor*...Three and a half.
OBJ: Not like you OR Moose ever care about what's fair.
DVD: Let me handle this, guys.
DVD comes to the front, but the three men stay behind him, arms crossed.
DVD: You and your brother both need to learn that--
FW: No, here's what you're going to learn. Keeping order isn't your job, Vic, outside of the Destroyitarium. You're just as bad as everyone else, jumping up, rushing out of the Destroyitarium at the first sign of anything. Just because you wrap yourself in the flag of 'defense' doesn't make it any better.
DVD: Don't talk to me that way--
FW: Why, cos I have a uterus? I'll talk to you whatever way I fucking want. You're awfully brave while you have those three behind you. Tell me something, Vic....you ever do anything one on one?
DVD: ....
FW: ....
DVD: ....
FW: .... I thought so. Anytime you want to step up and give it a shot, you know where to find me.
DVD: Yeah, nowhere near where you need to be.
Firewoman turns to glare at him, and reaches into her pocket for...something. DH, OBJ, and DDT all tense up, and then Firewoman smiles...but not a nice pleasant one. Kind of a scary one. Then it fades.
FW: Vic....I don't want all this either. I meant what I said, that I was glad you guys attacked Trinity. I meant that. But now... you need to let me handle things. At least give me a chance to before things escalate.
DVD: Yeah, we'll see, babe. C'mon guys.
Drink and Destroy all continue on their way towards the Destroyitarium, with a share of dirty looks all around. Fire and DH lock eyes a bit longer than the others. Once they have cleared out of the area, Fire sighs and goes over to her brother. She kicks him in the side.
FW: Get up.
MHJ: OW!
FW: Get the fuck up.
Moose slowly gets to his feet.
MHJ: Now do I get a stern talking to?
Firewoman pulls her hand out of her pocket and hits him with a right cross.
MHJ: DAMMIT. WHAT the hell?
FW: Enough. Not another word. Go back to your lightbulb and quit starting shit.
MHJ: YOUR husband attacked ME!
FW: AFTER you attacked Sparxx for saying mean words. You set this whole thing in motion, and you know it.
MHJ: *smiling* It was pretty awesome, wasn't it.
FW: It wasn't.
MHJ: Damn, you really have drunk the Kool-aid, Madame Commissioner.
FW: Go, while I try to figure out a way to not fine or suspend you.
MHJ: Yes, ma'am.
FW: Seriously, do you want me to punch you again?
MHJ: *growing very serious and getting nose to nose with Fire* You can get a lucky first punch, Sis. Don't count on getting the second.
FW: ....
MHJ: ....
FW: Go. We're done here.
MHJ: Not by a long shot, Sis...we are NOT done.
Moose walks away. Fire watches him go, sighs heavily, and then continues her search for peace and quiet. She gets her cell phone and dials.
FW: Yeah, Lucas......we need to talk....
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Post by BookerShark on May 6, 2011 23:53:26 GMT -5
*Stank is in the Hallway on his cellphone.*
Stank - Okay Juni I said I'd handle it.... no.... no that will not happen.
... .... ... I just got off the phone with Firewoman... I told her the same thing...
... I promise... ... I can put that aside for the quote unquote common good...
... .... yes.
.... .... okay fine... ... are we done?
... ... No. NO! DON'T YOU DARE PUT MARI- HAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYY Mario... ... yes itsa you.
... ... ... uh, huh.... ... Look I gotta go...
... yes Mario I heard about the Playstation Network hack... .. ... YOU DIDN'T!
.... NO YOU DIDN'T MARIO... BAD MARIO! BAD!... ... I'm hanging up now.
*Stank ends the call and arrives at the Destroyitarium. He walks in and spies everyone gathered around near a back booth.*
Stank - Just WHAT the FUCK do you people THINK you are DOING?
*Everyone looks up at The World Champion.*
DVD - Well if it isn't our Corporate World Champion. Save your speech Stank, Fire-
Stank - SHUT the FUCK up, Victor and listen! You think what you motherfuckers did was.. what... justice? You declaring yourselves the OOWF police? Nah uh! This is professional wrestling, boys. What happened after our match is the price of doing business. The scalpel Moose brought into it... maybe a tad much, but the real offense was J-P Sparxx who had ZERO business getting involved in that brawl! ZERO!
DHM - NOBODY GIVES a DAMN, STANK, WHAT YOU_
Stank - I'M NOT HERE TO LISTEN to YOUR SHIT MAGS! YOU WILL listen TO ME! What happened between Spark Plug and Moose was THEIR business! Alex sticking HIS nose in it was ridiculous, but at least HE had a valid reason to do it. YOU three? You already GOT your retribution after the match last week so WHY THE FUCK would you want to start this up AGAIN?
DVD - Stank, listen-
Stank - No YOU LISTEN! Part of the reason I took the job from Eco was to prevent a war from starting. A war that Alexander Darling is DETERMINED to make happen, and NOW I see you fucks are itchin to see happen as well! NAH AH! HELL TO THE NO! IT AIN'T HAPPENING! There won't BE any fucking war! Alex and Sparky got their pound of flesh! What you idiots did was OVER the GOTDAMN line! Yes Moose is my friend and back in the day he and I would have stormed this place and butchered you fucks! But THAT man *points to DDT* and I had an agreement of sorts! At least I thought we did!
*D&D continue to sit in silence, glaring at Stank.*
Stank - I am TRYING to fight the urge! I really am! You monkeys HAVE to realize that the OOWF will NOT survive another war! You MUST know that. It's the only thing keeping me from... .... never mind. I can't speak for Moose. He may seek retribution and would be WELL WITHIN his right to do so! I can promise you however, I will try to talk him out of it and if he does choose to go after you anyway, I will not participate... THIS time. But I'm warning you... ALL OF YOU! IF you stick your noses in any other roster members business, unsolicited, uninvited, I will take action... and you WILL lose. You don't believe me?
Then you haven't been paying attention!
*Stank turns and walks out of the Destroyitarium.*
FADE
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Post by BookerShark on May 6, 2011 23:54:28 GMT -5
*A few minutes later Stank walks into Firewoman's office.*
FW - Well?
Stank - Victor can sometimes be reasonable, we'll see.
*Firewoman sighs.*
Stank - Now about your brother.
FW - I heard you the first time.
Stank - Well then hear me again, Fire. Moose didn't jump Sparxx because of words. Sparxx started that shit by involving himself in our match. Which we could ignore, whatever. THEN he added the words. The boy is THICK.
FW - So you approve of a backstage attack. This is what you're saying to me.
*Stank remains silent.*
FW - You can't have it both ways, Lucas.
Stank - You KNOW how the game is played, Fire. I shouldn't have to explain to you the difference between what Moose did and what Drink & Destroy did. Sparxx practically ASKED for it! Go back and see his promo. Hell, I should fucking rip his head off for suggesting I'm a bigger joke than Osama Bin Laden, but I've already proven all I have to prove against him. I'm done with that prick until he finds a way to get his name opposite mine on the run sheet again. Moose? Sparxx called him on it and got burned. I can barely tolerate your husband sticking his nose in it.
FW - Well it's not for you to tolerate, Lucas. That's my job.
Stank - You're right. I've said my piece. I'm behind you, Fire. Whatever decision you want to make, you have my support. Now, if you will excuse me, I have to go find your brother before Hell is unleashed.
*Stank turns and walks out of Firewoman's office.*
Fade
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Post by BookerShark on May 6, 2011 23:55:39 GMT -5
*Fade in to the newly constructed Soyo Open Air Soccer Stadium, where we find El Lob Sangriento BASKING~! in the sunlight at midfield while the ring crew and various other production staff scuttle about getting the stadium ready for Mayhem…
ELS: (to camera) Hey there, kids! It’s your old pal Lobo coming to you live from Angola. You know, I’ve never been to Angola before. Nice place. Sunny, warm, relatively un-war-torn. Walk with me, would you?
*Lobo stands up and makes his way into the Hallway of Much Emptiness, which leads toward the Destroyatorium…
ELS: Wow. This hallway really is full of much emptiness. But that’s a good thing. Sometimes a little solitude is nice. Anyway, I wanted you to come along so I could go over my recent encounter with the CEO. Did I threaten him? Well, sort of. Not the nicest thing to do, and maybe not the smartest, but what can I say? I was frustrated.
ELS: The end result was exactly what I wanted, though. He agreed to a 100% clean Onslaught Rules match. That said, I still don’t trust him to keep that promise, and I still intend to do as much damage as the rules will allow for in the early going. You want ratings, Eco? Let’s put on the best damn Onslaught match the fans have ever seen. I truly believe that more people will tune in to see two warriors do battle properly than to see how the CEO will screw the rookie yet again.
*Lobo has reached the Destroyatorium, and he’s about to go in, because he’s done talking about the CEO, and standing in the Hallway of Much Emptiness serves no further purpose, when the door suddenly flies open, knocking Lobo back a few steps, and Stank comes STORMING~! out…
Stank: Get the fuck out of my way, rookie.
ELS: Sorry, man. Didn’t see you coming out of there. Totally my fault.
Stank: Fucking Canadians. I’m not in the mood for this.
*Stank walks away, and Lobo carefully enters the Destroyatorium, making sure he’s not going to get nailed by the door again…
ELS: Drink. Destroy. What up, y’all?
DVD: Apparently, you missed Stank’s little speech.
ELS: The speech, yes, but not the exit. Dude looked pissed. What’d you guys say to him?
DVD: Nothing. He wouldn’t let us get a word in.
ELS: What was he here for?
DVD: Playing peacekeeper. Trying to stop us from keeping his friends out of other people’s business. That sort of thing.
ELS: Wow. I mean, I saw what you did to MooseHead Jack, but I didn’t think it would lead to sanctions or anything. So what happens now?
OBJ: BEEEEEEEEELCHHHHH~! That’s Australian for grab a beer and a chair, and we’ll talk about it, mate.
*FADE*
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