OOWF Dance of Death 9
Live! From Hell, Michigan
Russ: Ladies and Gentlemen welcome to Hell! It’s Dance of Death 9! Joining me, as always is former ECW World Heavyweight champion, Razz
Razz: Good to be here!
Russ: I wasn’t sure if you would be here or back in the clubhouse
Razz: you could say I was the Ace up their sleeve
Nash: Or you could say that is the worst angle in the history of wrestling?
Razz: Worse than Oz?
Nash: Worse than your face?
Russ: And joining us for the first time in awhile, former WCW and WWE champion Nash
Nash: Good to be back
Russ: We start with one of the two newcomers to the OOWF, Jeremy Punswick, Razz I have to say, I don’t know much about this guy, but from what I have read, he, Moose and Fire should get along very well
Razz: Well, I don’t think it is fair to pigeonhole someone based on their background. I have seen some tape on this guy, and he is legit dangerous
Nash: I remember when I worked the indies. Packed the houses. Did you know I once held twelve indie championships at the same time?
Razz: you carried them all at once?
Nash: Yep
Razz: And didn’t blow out your quad? I don’t believe it
Russ: Enough of that. Let’s go to the ring and get our first look at “The Canadian Nightmare” Jeremy PunswickJEREMY PUNSWICK vs. RAP MASTER MC FREESTYLEIt’s time for the first of our two debuts tonight. Already in the ring and trying to get the crowd worked up with some of his rhymes is Rap Master MC Freestyle. He’s about to start another verse when
Budgie’s “I Turned to Stone” hits and OOWF newcomer, “The Canadian Nightmare” Jeremy Punswick steps out from the back. The bearded Canadian enters mostly to light applause as the fans are unsure what to make of him but that quickly turns to boos as he gives the fans what he thinks of them with some simple salutes. He makes his way into the ring and gets right in MC’s face. Freestyle tries to engage in a rap battle, but we hear Punswick say this isn’t the Shelter bitch and delivers that with a cutting slap to the face.
Angelo Barros thinks that’s enough and we are underway. JP backs up a few steps to allow Rap Master out of the corner and Freestyle charges, but Jeremy stops him with a well placed kick to the gut and quickly grabs him around the waist. Over the top Belly-to-Belly Suplex and Rap Master crashes into the turnbuckles hard. Punswick just shakes his head as he walks over and drags MC out of the corner and starts dropping elbows across the knees. From our research we know Punswick is a master of submissions and he looks to be setting up for one here. Freestyle trying to fight back but he’s swinging wildly and missing. MC does get back to a vertical base with Punswick holding onto one leg. Rap Master goes for an enzuiguri but JP ducks that and drags MC back to his feet. A DRAGON SCREW LEG WHIP tweaks the knee but the Canadian Nightmare isn’t done as he holds on to the leg and starts wrapping it up. He turns MC Freestyle over and locks in the TRAILER HITCH. This one could be over quick. MC on the verge of tapping, but he has enough to use a burst and grab the bottom rope. JP doesn’t seem to want to let go but he finally does on the count of 4 from Barros.
Punswick senses blood in the water and starts stalking his prey. Freestyle hobbles back up to his feet and tries to trade blows with Jeremy but that doesn’t seem to be going well for him as Punswick grabs one of the punches and locks Freestyle up…SIDEWINDER SUPLEX. Rap Master is on dream street as Punswick picks him back up and locks-in a standing Arm-Triangle choke. That’s new…OH MY…Overhead Suplex from that position and MC Freestyle lands right on top of his head. Punswick backs up into a corner and waits to see if his opponent gets up. And he clearly shouldn’t but he does and as soon as Rap Master is standing in the corner, JP gets a running start…YAKUZA KICK. RMMCF staggers out of the corner and gets nailed with a boot to the stomach. Punswick lifts him straight up in the air…we’ve heard this is what Jeremy likes to call the EXTINCTION LEVEL EVENT (vertical drop brainbuster) and he plants Rap Master MC Freestyle right on his head in the center of the ring. This one is over as Punswick makes the cover…
1…
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3!!!
WINNER in 7:45 – Jeremy Punswick
Russ: An impressive debut for Mr. Punswick!
Razz: I like what I saw out of that guy, he has a mean streak a mile wide, he is going to fit in just fine here in the OOWF
Nash: Takes more than just a mean streak or we would still be talking about Shashwat Mishra. This guy has talent too. Keep an eye on Punswick
Russ: Next up, our second newcomer, Amazing Jos. I know a little more about this guy, he is the LBCW World champion, which is quite an accomplishment. He is cocky, brash, arrogant, and can back it up in the ring.
Razz: My biggest concern about this guy is the fact that he is still holding that LBCW title, that is a HUGE responsibility, being up to the task of defending that AND competing in the OOWF is not going to be an easy task
Nash: Well, when I had twelve titles…..
Razz: You never had twelve titles. Ever.
Nash: The point is, if you aren’t going to challenge yourself, what’s the point? I have seen tape on this guy, and he wants to hold both the LBCW and OOWF world heavyweight titles. And I gotta say, you do that and it is hard to argue that you aren’t the very best wrestler in the world.
Razz: He’s got a way to go before he gets that opportunity, but the journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step
Nash: who said that? Confucius?
Razz: No, I just did
Russ: Let’s go to the ring for our first look at Amazing Jos AMAZING JOS vs. SVEN FAVREThe Packers fight song finishes playing as Sven Favre enters the ring and tests the ropes while waiting for his opponent, the second newcomer to debut tonight.
”Amazing” by Kanye West starts to play and the masked one, Amazing Jos bounces out to the stage. Much more mixed reaction for Jos as the crowd knows his exploits but isn’t sure how to react to his attitude yet. The arrogance is evident as he makes his way into the ring and stares down Sven. Davis Hightower makes sure both competitors are ready and they signal they are and we are underway here.
Sven starts off by throwing wild haymakers cause he’s just having fun out there and Jos backs up a step and smirks as he grabs one of those wild punches and nails a picture perfect arm drag. Sven is right back to his feet and charges once again and this time AJ takes him down with a drop toe-hold and floats right over and goes for a crossface, but Favre scrambles to his feet and looks to pick Jos up, but Jos is lightning quick and catches the crouching Favre with a knee to the dome. That stagger SF back and Jos quickly follows by leaping up and snapping off a beautiful hurricanrana. Favre is having a tough time handling the speed of Jos here and looks to just get inside AJ’s defense. SF charges once again and once again, Amazing Jos is a step ahead as he lifts Favre up, spins and twists and turns him…TILT-A-WHIRL backbreaker. Jos hits the ropes…LIONSAULT but he doesn’t go for the cover. Jos rolls off Sven and kips up to his feet and seems to be enjoying himself here as he wipes fake dirt off his shoulder.
Jos leans down and starts talking some trash as the mic picks up, “I got 99 problems, but you ain’t one.” That seems to fire Sven up as he tries for a kick, but Jos grabs the leg and spins him all the way around and nails his own kick to the chest; followed by a second and then a third before finishing up with a leg sweep…he likes to call that the FALCON RUSH. Jos is in total control here as he drags Favre back to his feet and picks him up onto his shoulders…SHUT THE HELL UP 1.0 (fireman’s carry code breaker) connects and Sven is dazed. Jos backs up a few steps to allow SF to get to his feet…FALCON KICK and this one is academic now.
1…
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3!!!
WINNER in 6:51, Amazing Jos
Russ: I believe he lived up to his reputation
Razz: That was a very impressive win for Amazing Jos
Nash: It was Sven Favre
Razz: A win is a win
Nash: It is good to get your first OOWF win, I am not arguing that, but I want to see what they can do against some real competition
Russ: Well, they will both get their opportunity, I am just getting word that both Amazing Jos and Jeremy Punswick are entered into this year’s OOWF invitational!
Razz: Now THAT is where you can make your mark!
Russ: Our next match is our first Dance of Death match and features Danny Taylor, Davin Moreland, Comrade Sharkoff and Ricky Soaring Eagle, gentlemen, I have to believe this match is Danny’s to lose
Razz: Yeah, I have to agree there. Sharkoff and Soaring Eagle seem to be a bit lost lately, and Davin just hasn’t been himself of late. I don’t know what’s on his mind, but it doesn’t appear to be wrestling
Nash: But counting Moreland out would be a mistake. No one in this match has been in more big matches than Davin, and while he seems to be distracted lately, he can win a match with a Really Good Diamond Cutter out of nowhere at any time. Never ever underestimate him.
Razz: I don’t think anyone is underestimating him, especially Danny, but Taylor is on a roll of late, I expect big things from Danny Taylor in 2013
Russ: We are ready for our first Dance of Death, ladies and gentlemen, let’s head to the ring!DANNY TAYLOR vs. COMRADE SHARKOFF vs. DAVIN MORELAND vs. RICKY SOARING EAGLE – Dance of DeathWe start out first with Comrade Sharkoff. He gets mostly boos, but there's some indie wanker types that cheer him just because. Ricky Soaring Eagle comes out next to very clear boos. He sneers at everyone before entering the ring. Next, Dynamite Danny Taylor appears to massive face-pop cheers, accompanied by Dashing Victor Dinero. They both slap some hands on the way down, and DDT gets into the ring. There's a dramatic pause before "Notorious" fires up and the G.O.A.T. Davin Moreland appears. The crowd pops huge again, and he soaks it up. He gets to the ring with the high fives and such, shakes hands with Danny. They offer their hands to Sharkoff and RSE, but that goes predictably nowhere. Victor heads to the back, and we get the call for the bell. Ding! Ding!
We start out with our usual fatal-fourway exchanges. Everyone gets a hand in and bodies are flying around the ring as all four wrestlers try to isolate one another. Davin shows his experience by getting Comrade Sharkoff in the corner and, after some well placed chops, snapmaring him over onto a back breaker on Davin's knee, and then making an early pin. Meanwhile RSE has been brutalizing DDT, and after hitting a couple European uppercuts, and then whips him into the turnbuckle. He turns and sees Davin's pin and breaks it up, giving Danny time to recover. Davin turns towards RSE, who is too close to the ropes, and eats a big clothesline over the top one by Davin. Sharkoff recovers enough to see DDT still a bit stunned in the corner. He makes a run for it, but DDT catches it and at the last minute lifts Sharkoff up so he hits Snake Eyes into the corner. Sharkoff bounces out with hands over his eyes. DDT grabs him by the shirt and trunks and throws him out of the ring. DDT turns slowly and faces Davin, as the two smile and the fans go batshit insane.
The two big men trade blows and rope work, and excellent technical chain wrestling. RSE recovers and slides in, but Danny and Davin double team him, hitting a double power slam. Sharkoff runs in and Davin catches him into a sidewalk slap. Danny goes for the opportunistic pin, but Davin breaks it up.
And that's basically the story of this match, folks. It may technically be a fatal fourway, but neither Danny nor Davin seem to be interested in Sharkoff or Ricky, quickly dispatching them every time they get involved. No, this is a clinic between Davin Moreland, the veteran who can still bring it, and Danny Taylor, who's probably at the top of his form right now.
Davin gets Danny in a standing armbar, but Danny rolls out of and gets to his feet, hitting an Exploder Suplex! He hits the pin and one...two...NO! Davin kicks out just as Sharkoff comes in. Sharkoff grabs Danny from behind, into a bear hug, but Danny rushes backward crusing Sharkoff into the ring post. He turns and whips Sharkoff into the center of the ring where Davin is waiting to grab him and hit an atomic drop. Sharkoff grabs the Little Ruskies and rolls out of the ring. Somewhere, Mila Kunis screams NOOOOOOOO!!! While Danny is laughing at this, Davin is making his move and comes around behind for a rear naked choke! Danny does not succumb to this, and flips him right over. Davin quickly gets to his feet and they again go with the chain wrestling, rope work that is totally over with the fans.
Ricky Soaring Eagle is stalking around the outside and looking for his chance. He gets it when Danny sends Davin hard into the ring post. RSE leaps up, kicks Davin in the stomach while Sharkoff distracts Danny with punches. It appears they are working together for now at least. He gets Davin onto his left shoulder and hits Return to Earth! RSE rolls him over for the pin, one...two...NO! Sharkoff is done working together and has apparently retrieved his chain from under the ring, and as RSE stands up, Sharkoff hits him with the Sickle! RSE goes down and Sharkoff dives for the pin, one..two...NO! It's broken up by Danny! Sharkoff gets to his feet and gets into Danny's face. He says something decidedly un-American, because Danny gets PISSED, and kicks him right in the gut, doubling him over and in perfect position for the DYNAMITE DROP! Danny rolls him over, hooks the leg, one...two.....NO!!!! Davin breaks it up!!!
Danny gets to his feet, and Davin struts around the ring a bit, explaining to Danny how he's the GOAT, and all that. Danny goes to rush him, but Davin dodges, hits the ropes and comes out and hits ONE OF THE BEST REALLY GOOD DIAMOND CUTTERS EVER! He rolls Danny over, hooks the leg, and the crowd counts along...
One...
Two....
NO!!!!!! NO NO NO!!! Danny kicks out at the last minute. Davin can't believe it. The crowd can't believe it. Its possible even Danny can't believe it, but he doesn't sit around and wait, getting to his feet and ready. Davin stands, but Danny pounces before Davin can get his balance, kicking him in the gut, and finally hitting DYNAMITE DROP! He rolls him for the pin, and one.....two.......THREE!!!!
WINNER in 27:11 – Danny Taylor
Davin kicked out but it was just AFTER the referee hit the mat the third time. He sits up, in disbelief and looks around, and then at Danny who has rolled away and is in the corner, head in his hands, in disbelief that he won the match. The referee goes over to raise Danny's hand and he gets to his feet. Davin slowly stands and goes over to where Danny is standing, grabs his other arm and raises it. The referee steps back. and Davin takes over, presenting Danny to all four sides of the ring. The crowd goes wild for this, as Davin turns to Danny, and they embrace. As they do, Davin speaks into Danny's ear, and Danny nods. They separate and Davin raises Danny's hand for the crowd again, and rolls out of the ring to the front row where Samantha is standing, crying, holding Mickie who is cheering for her daddy, and wearing her Firewoman T-shirt. Davin sees this, shakes his head and grabs Mickie, so Sam can climb over the barricade. They embrace, and then he takes her hand and they walk slowly up the ramp. Samantha has tears running down her cheek, and Davin appears pretty darn choked up to. As they get to the top of the ramp, Davin sees that Chad, Firewoman, Alex, and Alexis are all at the top as well, and there is much hand shaking and hugging. Alex and Alexis go to the back. Firewoman hugs her cousin again, and he whispers something in her ear. She takes Mickie, and goes to the back with Sam. Chad and Davin stand on the top of the ramp, look around the arena who has busted out a DLP chant and shake hands. Chad tips his cowboy hat, and goes to the back to allow Davin to soak up the crowd, who has morphed into a "DAV-IN" chant. Finally, after many thank yous and waves, he reluctantly turns and heads to the back.
Russ: did we……..did we just see the last of Davin Moreland?
Razz: Man, I don’t know……it sure looked like it
Nash: I haven’t heard anything official, but I just got word from Attitude Adjuster that the odds of that being it for Davin are 2:1
Russ: If that was, in fact, the end for Davin, he will go down as one of the greatest in the history of the OOWF
Razz: And not to take away from an impressive win by Danny Taylor, but……well I am in SHOCK
Nash: you could kind of see the writing on the wall though, after that attack by the New Guard put him on the shelf, he came back as Ski Mask Guy and…..well while he did exact some measure of revenge, you could tell his heart just wasn’t in it. This won’t be popular, but if you're not in it completely, then go away
Razz: Then how do you explain your long career?
Nash: What?
Razz: Hey next up, the onslaught “Dance of Death”
Russ: Did you just use air quotes?
Razz: You know, I have to agree with Moose on this one, this is not a Dance of Death match, this is a handicap match. I know you hate him, but Moose is getting a raw deal here
Russ: And he deserves every second of it. I sincerely hope Eco, Mai and Kai destroy Moose and send him out of the OOWF
Nash: Wow. When did he become so impartial?
Razz: I think Moose kicked his dog or something
Russ: Let’s go to the ringMOOSEHEAD JACK vs. MAI MUYO vs. THE KAI vs. ECOSYSTEM - OOWF Onslaught Championship Dance of DeathThe introductions are made and Moose slumps in the corner as Mai, Eco and Kai wait in the other corners just chomping at the bit to get to Moose. The bell rings and the three of them charge toward the corner, but Moose rolls out of the ring to the floor. As Kai, Mai and Eco stand there, Eco grabs Kai from behind and rolls him up for a two count. Kai gets to his feet and gets in Eco’s face, and when he does, Mai grabs him from behind and rolls him up for another two count. The Kai gets to his feet and backs into the corner and eyes the Muyo’s warily.
Eco moves toward Kai while Moose grains Mai and pulls her out of the ring to the floor and catches her with a right cross to the jaw that drops her to the floor. The momentary distraction allows Kai to catch Eco with a kick to the gut and PLANT him with a DDT, then roll him over for a two count. Eco kicks out easily and spins to his feet, then sees Moose grab a chair on the outside, and charges at the ropes and dives between them and takes Moose out before he can use the chair on Mai!
Eco pulls Moose to his feet and lights him up with chops, backing him around the ring. Mai recovers and slides back into the ring where she and Kai lock up. Kai grabs a side head lock, but Mai shoves him to the ropes and catches him on the rebound with a belly to belly suplex for a one count. Kai gets back to his feet and Mai tries to catch him with a kick, but Kai catches her foot, spins her around and nearly decapitates her with a clothesline! Kai covers, but Mai kicks out at two.
On the outside, Eco is choking Moose on the steel barricade, and doesn’t break at five, so the outside referee issues his first warning.
Ecosystem has used his first referee warningEco grabs the chair Moose had, and lifts it above his head to bring down on Moose’s skull, inside the ring, we hear Mai yell for him to stop, Eco glances toward the ring, and Moose catches him with a kick to the gut and SLAMS him face first into the ring post!
Moosehead Jack has used his first referee warningEco falls to the floor, eyes glassy and blood running from a nasty goose egg right above his eye. Moose slides back into the ring and waits in the corner. Kai pulls Mai back to her feet and peppers her with rights and lefts, then whips her to the ropes, holds on and pulls her back right into a REEF BOTTOM! The Kai kips back to his feet and is going to go for the HAWAIIAN ELBOW, but as he runs toward the ropes, Moose explodes out of the corner and SLAMS him in the face with a BUISAKU KNEE! The Kai goes down in a heap and Moose covers, but the Kai somehow manages to roll his shoulder at two. Moose gets to his feet and backs against the ropes, but Eco grabs his foot and pulls him to the floor, grabs the chair and SLAMS it down on Moose’s head!
Ecosystem has used his second referee warningEco has a crazed look in his eyes, and grabs the chair and slams it down on Moose again
Ecosystem has used his third and final referee warningMai rolls out of the ring and gets between them and tries to calm Eco down, while she is talking, Moose reaches under the ring and grabs a kendo stick and SLAMS it across the back of Mai’s head, which drives Eco over the edge, he takes the chair and throws it at Moose, bouncing it off his head.
Ecosystem has been disqualified – Ecosystem is eliminatedEco keeps hammering Moose with punches and kicks, and at some point breaks a bottle and threatens to slash Moose’s throat. Moose is laughing like a maniac the whole time as blood pours down his face. Security pulls Eco off of Moose and escorts him to the back.
While all this is going on, the Kai grabs a stunned Mai and rolls her back into the ring, sends her to the ropes and hits TO THE SANDS! Mai is stunned, the Kai climbs to the top rope and hits a rarely seen MOONSAULT OVER MAUI and gets the one, two, three!
Mai has been eliminatedThe Kai gets to his feet and glares at Moose and motions for him to bring his ass back into the ring. Moose sits on the outside slumped against the guardrail, spitting blood, laughing. The Kai slides out of the ring and catches Moose with a kick to the face, then pulls him up and shoots him back into the ring. Moose gets to his feet and tries a punch to the face, but the Kai blocks it and slams Moose in the face with a headbutt that staggers Moose back to the corner. Kai charges in and catches Moose with a high knee to the face, then as he staggers out, kicks him in the gut and catches him with a scissors kick to the back of the head that sends him to the mat. Kai rolls Moose over and covers, but Moose manages to roll his shoulder at two.
The Kai pulls Moose up and sends him to the ropes and catches him with another TO THE SAND, then holds onto his legs and turns him over into a SHARPSHOOTER! The Kai leans way back and yells for Moose to tap, but Moose just snarls and refuses to tap out. Moose slowly drags himself to the ropes and manages to grab the bottom rope forcing the break.
Moosehead Jack has used his first rope breakMoose pulls himself up using the ropes and staggers out, the Kai backs into the opposite corner and explodes across the ring for the PIPELINE! But Moose sidesteps the move and Kai SLAMS into the corner, driving his shoulder and head into the ring post with a sickening THUD! Moose grabs Kai and hits a CHAOS THEORY, bridging hard on the German, but somehow Kai kicks out at two!
Moose gets to his feet and barks at the referee while Kai tries to regain his composure. As Kai tries to get to his feet, Moose catches him with a kick to the face that sends him back to the mat. Moose repeats this several times, but the crowd starts to chant for the Kai, and each kick has less effect, and the Kai works back to his feet! Moose swings wildly, but Kai ducks the move, and hits a FLOATOVER DDT! Kai covers again, but Moose manages to kick out at two!
The Kai gets to his feet, and plays to the crowd, but then holds his head and stumbles a bit, still feeling the effects of the shot to the post. Kai pulls Moose up and scoops him onto his shoulder for a powerslam, but Moose slips off his back and shoves him into the corner, Kai slams into the corner chest first and staggers back, Moose grabs him around the waist and hits a RELEASE GERMAN OVER THE TOP ROPE! The Kai lands awkwardly on the floor and is not moving!
Medics immediately rush to ringside to check on him, but they don’t immediately call for a stretcher. After a few seconds, the Kai shoves them away and pulls himself up using the guardrail and looks at Moose “is that all you got bitch?” Moose slides out of the ring and he and the Kai begin brawling at ringside. Kai gets the better of the exchange, so Moose staggers away and pulls a chain out of his pocket, then turns around and BLASTS Kai right in the face!
Moosehead Jack uses his second referee warningMoose pulls Kai to his feet and sets him up and hits an APRON POWERBOMB. Kai falls to the floor, holding his back and neck. Moose grabs a chair and is about to use it when he notices Ecosystem and Mai sitting in the front row. How did they get there? Eco just glares at Moose while Mai has a smirk on her face. We see why in just a second. The Kai is back on his feet and he SUPERKICKS the chair back into Moose’s face, bouncing it off his noggin and sending Moose to the floor.
The Kai uses his first referee warningThe Kai grabs Moose and rolls him into the ring. As Moose sits up, a dazed look on his face, Kai charges at him from behind and kicks at the back of his head, but misses, then hits a mule kick to Jack’s face that sends him to the mat. The Kai gets to his feet and rallies the fans, Moose reaches into his pocket for something else, does no one ever check wrestlers anymore? As Kai pulls Moose to his feet, Moose BLASTS him upside the head, and we see it is a pair of brass knuckles! Kai goes down like he has been shot! Moose falls on him, slides the knucks out of the ring and the referee counts, one……two……three. Moose steals another one.
But wait! Mai jumps the guardrail and grabs the knucks and slides into the ring! She shows them to the referee and explains that Moose used them. Moose feigns innocence until we see the replay on the OOTron. The referee announces the match continues, and
Moosehead Jack has received his third and final referee warning Moose is LIVID. He grabs Mai by the hair and sets her up for a PACKAGE PILEDRIVER when the Kai recovers enough to connect with a SUPERKICK that sends Moose out of the ring to the floor. While the referee is getting Mai out of the ring, Eco hops the guard rail and PLANTS Moose on the floor with the ENDGAME! He rolls Moose back into the ring, the Kai never saw Eco interfere, he covers Moose, one….two……NO! Moose gets his foot on the bottom rope!
Moosehead Jack has used his second rope breakThe Kai gets to his feet and yells for the HAOLE HAMMER. As Moose struggles to get to his feet, Clio and Edra race to the ring (well, in Clio’s case, maybe race is the wrong word) Edra gets on the apron and distracts the referee. Clio slides into the ring behind Kai and nails a LOW BLOW! The Kai staggers forward and Moose grabs him and lifts him for a PACKAGE PILEDRIVER just before he hits it, Clio slides a chair into the ring right under Kai’s head! Moose hits the move, then Clio pulls the chair out and she and Edra head up the ramp. Moose rolls Kai over and gets the one…..two……three.
WINNER in 37:31 – Moosehead Jack
Eco and Mai hop the rail again and protest, Moose slides out of the ring and grabs his title and staggers up the ramp where he meets Clio and Edra and the Saints of Sinners celebrate another victory
Russ: REALLY? It takes THREE people for Moose to beat Kai?
Razz: Are you serious Russ? Why was Eco and Mai allowed at ringside? This was a three on one match the whole time! All Moose did was even the odds at the end!
Nash: This was a bit of a lopsided match, come on Russ, even you can’t deny that
Russ: What I won’t deny is that Moosehead Jack is a CANCER in the OOWF, and he has dragged those damn jezebels Clio and Edra right down to his level. The Saints of Sinners are everything that is wrong with wrestling all wrapped up into one nice package, and the fact that Moose is still the Onslaught champion is just disgusting.
Nash: Wow
Razz: Told ya
Nash: Maybe we should move on to the tag title Dance of Death……that is if you’re done trashing Moosehead Jack?
Russ: The tag team Dance of Death just further proves my point. Texpress had their opportunity taken away by Clio and Edra. Those two will stoop to no end to injure people
Razz: Well…..to be fair it WAS a cage match, and Clio and Edra were ALSO hospitalized…..
Russ: Not the point.
Nash: Ok, the match. I think we can eliminate Banned From Everywhere…..
Razz: They are former tag team champions….
Nash: They also often have no idea where they are. And I think Power and Glory can be eliminated, that match was so brutal, and the damage done…..they are not going to be 100%
Russ: No one in the OOWF ever is, but I agree, I think this comes down to The Darlings and LD Williams and Stank, and those two teams just plain do not like one another on any level
Razz: Well, the Darlings are still searching for respect, which is odd because LD and Stank are doing the same thing
Nash: Respect is the four letter word of professional wrestling. It doesn’t matter if you have it or not, what matters is being the champions. Right now the Darlings are the champions, and I expect it to stay that way
Razz: Not tonight. LD Williams and Stank have something to prove. They are the hunters, and there may not be two better wrestlers in the entirety of OOWF history. Tonight they add to their legacy
Russ: I think I am with Nash on this one. The Darlings may not have the tag experience that LD and Stank do individually, but they are crafty veterans, they hold onto those titles tonight. We are ready to go, let’s head to the ring!THE DARLINGS vs. LD WILLIAMS & STANK vs. BANNED FROM EVERYWHERE vs. POWER & GLORY – OOWF World Tag Team Title Dance of DeathThe first team out for this Dance of Death should be Texpress, but they’ve been removed due to injury and replaced by Power and Glory. The crowd is decidedly unhappy with this change in plans boos the replacements heavily. . The Neal twins drink in the reaction as they saunter to the ring, openly mocking the crowd. Somewhere Moosehead Jack is…turning the ends of his scowl upwards. Clio and Edra climb into the ring and pose on the turnbuckles, antagonizing the crowd further. Just as a riot seems inevitable, the reaction turns on a dime as Banned from Everywhere come out, and the crowd explodes for the former champions. Ellie May (on her Likkercycle) leads Awesome Bill from Dawsonville and Justin Sane (on Drunkey and Drunkette, respectively) to the ring. The boys look surprisingly focused tonight as they dismount and circle the ring. The crowd’s rollercoaster continues as L.D. Williams and Stank step onto the stage. The boos are almost as loud as they were for Power and Glory’s unwanted appearance, but the former Five members might as well be walking in silence for all the reaction they show. L.D. and Stank push through BfE’s entourage and climb into the ring.
Power and Glory dare BfE to get in the ring, but Ellie May wisely holds her men back. The war of words is interrupted as “Sail” starts to play. A spotlight circles the crowd before locking on the stage as the OOWF World Tag Team Champions step through the curtain. Alexander and Alexis Darling throw back their hoods and hold their championships high before striding to the ring as the crowd roars its approval. As the champions reach ringside, referee Angelo Barros backs up the other challengers to allow BfE and the Darlings into the ring - likely a high point for his control over this match. Barros displays the belts to all four teams, hands them ringside, and calls for the bell.
Four-on-four standoff to start, which lasts until Justin sticks out a hand and asks to borrow five bucks. Clio responds with a slap that spins him a complete 360. She drives a knee into his stomach and sends him into the corner. Before she can follow, Alexis drops her with a backstabber. Edra catches Alexis with a knee to the face as she gets up, but turns around into a dropkick from Alex. Awesome Bill launches himself at Williams, but Stank clips him with a punch to the side of the head, and they slam him into the turnbuckles. Justin sprints across the ring and tries for a double bulldog, but Stank and L.D. catch him propel him over the ropes to the floor.
Alex grabs Edra and winds her arm. He turns it into a hammerlock and drives her to the mat, holding her in place as Alexis hits a leg drop to the back of her head. Clio aims a kick at Alexis, but Alex catches it and reverses into a dragon screw leg whip. He hangs on and rolls her into a half-crab, presumably to annoy his brother-in-law. Edra is quick to break that up with a punch to the face. She pulls Alex to his feet, but Alexis grabs her from behind and hits a German suplex. Alexis bridges and gets a two count.
Across the ring, Williams and Stank pummel Bill in the corner. Williams buries a knee in his stomach, and Stank follows up by driving an elbow into the back of his head. Justin climbs onto the apron and Williams swings, but Justin ducks and drags him over the ropes. Williams crashes to the floor, and Justin leaps onto him with a double stomp. Stank tries to lift Bill into a power bomb, but the awesome one drops to his knees to block. Stank hammers him with forearms and tries to pull him up, and Bill stuns him with a European uppercut. Stank responds in kind, and the big men throw down. Bill gets the upper hand through sheer enthusiasm until Stank goes to the eyes. Bill stumbles back, and Stank kicks him into the ropes. Edra leaves off her brawl with Alexis and joins Stank, and they hit a tandem clothesline on Bill that takes all three of them over the ropes.
With Edra gone, Alexis moves to help her brother. The champions send Clio to the ropes and hit a double dropkick. Alexis rolls to her feet and hits the ropes, and Alex sits Clio up so she can hit a diving clothesline. The Darlings pull Clio up and each wind an arm before lifting her onto the top turnbuckle. Clio fights back as Alexis climbs up, but Alex climbs up from the apron and they subdue her. They pull Clio up until she’s standing on the top turnbuckle with Alexis, but before they can hit whatever they were planning Edra yanks Alexis’ feet from under her, dropping her face first onto the turnbuckle. Clio is knocked off-balance as well, but grabs Alex. She tries to turn her fall into a DDT, but Alex breaks free in the air and lands on top. He covers, but Edra drags him off. She rolls Alex over and starts pummeling him with forearms. Justin knows an opportunity when he sees one and slides into the ring. He covers Clio and gets a long two count before Edra dives onto him for the break.
Outside the ring, we have our first color of the match, as Williams and Stank run Bill face-first into the ring post. Bill sees the blood and starts to fire up. Stank throws a punch, but Bill sidesteps and he hits steel. Bill drives a knee into Stank’s gut and hits a pair of right hands, but Williams pins his arms and Stank slams him with a head butt. They sling Bill into the ringside barrier, and Stank follows him with a running forearm. They lift Bill up and drop him throat-first onto the barrier, and then climb back into the ring. Edra whips Justin toward Stank, who plants him with a spinning side slam. He covers, but Justin rolls a shoulder barely in time. Stank drags Justin to his feet and Williams joins him to hit a tandem suplex. Williams floats over into a cover, but Barros is busy across the ring, where Edra has Alex in a dragon sleeper. He checks, but Alex isn’t out, and Alexis breaks it up with a super kick.
Alexis pounces on Edra as she falls, slamming her head into the mat. She rolls Edra over and grabs her arms - curb stomp! She hangs on and tries to set up a second, but Clio slams into her with a spear. They tumble across the mat, and Clio ends up on top, hammering Alexis with punches. Alex starts over to help, but Stank clubs him from behind with a forearm. Alex turns, and Stank grabs him in a two-handed choke. A kick to the unmentionables puts a stop to that, and Alex drops Stank with a face slam. Edra stumbles over and kicks Alex in the knee, following up with a kick to the throat as he falls. Alex rolls out to the floor, so Edra turns and covers Stank, getting a one count before he powers out. Stank starts to get up, but Alex drags him out of the ring. Haymakers are exchanged, with Stank getting the better of it, until Edra slingshots over the ropes and takes both men down with a plancha.
On the other side of the ring, Williams is exchanging chops with Justin. Bill climbs back in the ring to help his partner, and BfE quickly take control. They send Williams across the ring to where Alexis and Clio are exchanging forearms. The ladies see him coming, turn, and execute a perfect flapjack. They both roll to their feet – just in time to be leveled by a charging Bill. Justin follows a step behind and leapfrogs his partner, hitting the world’s lowest elevation frog splash on Williams. He covers, but only gets a two-count. Williams rolls to his knees and blocks a kick from Clio, but gets nailed by one from Alexis. Clio grabs Alexis while she’s off-balance and plants her with a belly-to-back suplex. She tries to bridge, but Alexis rolls free. As they brawl, Bill stomps on Williams and Justin scales the ropes. He looks around wild-eyed and screams “DOUGHA-urk” - Clio and Alexis crash into the corner. Justin is crotched on the top turnbuckle and tumbles slowly to the mat.
Williams catches one of Bill’s kicks and yanks him off balance. He rolls to his knees and drives a fist into Bill’s solar plexus, and then gets up and snaps him over with a suplex. Williams hops onto the second turnbuckle and drives an elbow into Bill’s throat. He makes a cover, but rolls out of the way as Clio and Alexis brawl past. Clio catches Bill in the head with a kick on the way by, and Williams sweeps both ladies’ legs, sending them to the mat.
Out on the floor, Edra is on her feet and putting the boots to Alex. She drags him to his feet and holds him open for a punch from Stank, and then slams his head into the ring apron. Edra climbs onto the apron and springs off the second rope to drive an elbow into the back of Alex’s neck. Stank grabs her as she lands and hits a release German suplex that slams her into the ringside barrier. Stank rolls to his feet and runs at Alex, leveling him with a big boot.
Stank slides into the ring and joins his partner. They approach the dazed Justin and drag him to his feet, but Williams is felled by a kick to the knee from Clio and a knee to the face from Alexis. Stank grabs both women for a noggin knocker, but gets doubled over by twin knees to the gut. The spirit of cooperation doesn’t last, however, as Clio immediately rakes the eyes and Alexis responds with a chop to the throat. Edra is on the apron and springs to the top rope as Stank turns around. She slams into him with a cross body. Stank catches her, but is knocked off balance and stumbles back. Stank trips over Justin, who rolls as the big man falls. Edra tumbles free and Justin rolls Stank up, hooking both legs and scrabbling with both feet as Barros slides into to position and counts One…Two…Three.
Stank and L.D. Williams have been eliminated.Stank rolls to his feet, and he is
livid. He grabs Justin by the throat and drags him to his feet. Bill moves to help his partner, but gets blindsided by Williams. Stank levels Justin with a head butt as Williams steps onto the apron. Stank lifts Justin for a wheelbarrow suplex as Williams springs to the top rope - Canadian Death Sentence! Stank and Williams roll out of the ring, leaving Justin for dead (pun intended). Bill checks on his partner, and then his head snaps around to the retreating team. Bill slides out and circles the ring. He lets out a rebel yell and chases after Williams and Stank, who turn to meet him. Bill is quickly overwhelmed, but Alex comes to his aid. Inside the ring, Edra drags Justin to his feet, hits a DDT, and makes the academic cover. Barros counts One…Two…Three.
Banned from Everywhere have been eliminated.Clio slides into the ring to join her sister, and they turn their attention to Alexis. Alexis backs into the corner, warily watching both sisters, and then suddenly launches herself at Edra, knocking her down with a forearm. Alexis catches a kick from Clio and flips her off her feet. Edra is back up, and Alexis focuses on her, which allows Clio to roll behind her and sweep her legs. Power and Glory put the boots to Alexis, stomping her into the mat. They each grab an arm and drag her to her feet. They send Alexis to the ropes, lift her high in the air, and drive her down across their knees. They catch her as she bounces and slam her to the mat with a tandem STO. Edra drags Alexis back to her feet while Clio scales the ropes. Edra plants Alexis in the corner with a gorilla press slam, and Clio nails a 450 splash! Clio hooks the leg, and Barros slides into position. One…Two…Thr-Alex slides into the ring and breaks the fall just in time!
Edra immediately pounces on Alex, hammering him with punches. Alex breaks free and rolls out to the apron. He ducks a punch from Edra, but can’t avoid a kick from Clio. Alex teeters on the apron, and Edra vaults the ropes, hooking him for a sunset flip power bomb. Alex grabs the top rope to block, but Clio hits a super kick that allows her sister to complete the move. Before Clio can follow them to the floor, Alexis rolls her up and bridges, getting a long two-count. Both women roll to their feet and Alexis throws a kick. Clio ducks it and pushes Alexis against the ropes. Edra hops onto the apron and grabs Alexis’ head, dropping off and clotheslining her on the top rope. Clio hooks Alexis for an inverted DDT, but Alex is back in to break it up with a tackle. Edra is right behind him and catches Alex with a knee to the face. Alexis spins Edra around and swings, but Edra catches the punch and drags Alexis onto her shoulders. She hits a death valley driver, pitching Alexis over the ropes to the outside! Alexis’ head hits the apron on the way down and she looks to be out cold.
Alex gets the better of an exchange with Clio and sends her to the ropes. She ducks a clothesline. Alex turns, and Edra levels him with a Thesz press, landing on him and throwing punches. Edra and Clio drag Alex to his feet and Clio rakes his eyes. Alex staggers, and the girls spin around - Total Elimination! Clio falls on Alex for the cover, and Barros counts One…Two…Three!
WINNERS, and NEW OOWF World Tag Team Champions, in 42:03, Power and Glory!
After the match: Barros hands the Tag Team Titles to Power and Glory, who fall to their knees hugging the belts. They get slowly to their feet and climb the turnbuckles, holding their championships high as the crowd boos them mercilessly. On the stage, Moosehead Jack steps though the curtain. He watches his protégés in the ring and smirks. Power and Glory make their way up the aisle and flank their mentor, holding their new championships high.
Razz: What an upset!
Nash: I did not see that coming.
Russ: I cannot believe this! Those damn jezebels won the tag team titles! The Saints of Sinners hold the tag team and onslaught championship in the OOWF! This……this sickens me to no end!
Nash: I DID see that coming though
Razz: hey, they won. And it didn’t take anything dirty, they won clean
Russ: They are a pox on the OOWF, no better than that damned Moosehead Jack.
Nash: Not going to change his mind, are we
Razz: Not after the barbecue sauce incident. Let’s just move on
Nash: Next up, DK Murphy defends his Intercontinental title against Matt Folz, Rabbit Mask and Chad Madison, what do you expect from this one?
Razz: This one is hard to call. Chad Madison is not 100%, but as we just saw with the tag match, that doesn’t always mean anything. Rabbit Mask has been a lot like Sharkoff and Soaring Eagle, kind of wandering lately, and Matt Folz has no interest whatsoever in this match
Russ: Which that right here. THAT RIGHT THERE. Folz is being given an opportunity at the OOWF Intercontinental title, there are wrestles who would kill for that chance, and he is just treating it as an insult? That is damn insulting!
Nash: Did someone spike his Metamucil with bitter? Jeez Russ
Razz: I think this comes down to Murphy and Madison, and I think in the end, the kid takes advantage of the wounded veteran and gets the win
Nash: I think this is a dangerous trap for Murphy. Folz is Folz, and he would happily cost someone the title just to be a dick. Rabbit Mask has a million ways to drop someone on their head and end the match, and Madison, while wounded, has proven he is a competent singles wrestler. I think Murphy can win, but it is not going to be as easy as we think
Razz: Russ, you have anything to say?
Russ: Yes. Let’s go to the ring.DK MURPHY vs. MATT FOLZ vs. RABBIT MASK vs. CHAD MADISON – OOWF Intercontinental Title Dance of DeathThe four competitors enter the ring and the bell rings. DK Murphy, Matt Folz and Rabbit Mask are all ready to go, but Chad is showing signs of injury, which is to be expected from a man who four days ago may never have wrestled again after the hellacious match that he, Zane, Power and Glory went through.
Out of respect for Chad’s injured state, DK goes right after Folz. Rabbit Mask on the other hand shows no remorse in going after Chad, focusing on Chad’s head and neck. If Chad didn’t have a concussion going into this match, he certainly has one now. Rabbit throws Chad to the outside and continues the beatdown.
Back in the ring, Folz and Murphy are having a wrestling clinic, countering each other hold for hold, and letting neither one get an advantage. Rabbit enters the fray again after superkicking Chad in the face and leaving him on the outside.
After a few minutes, Chad has gotten back into the match and seems to be holding his own now against Folz. Rabbit tosses DK into the turnbuckle and hits a corner dropkick. Rabbit gets a bit cocky and doesn’t realize that Folz is right behind him. It’s too late however as Folz has him locked in the Tazzmision. Rabbit is on the verge of tapping out when out of nowhere, Folz is superkicked by Chad Madison, which Folz sells like a gunshot. DK hits Chad with a Bicycle Kick that knocks him out of the ring. DK sets up the still-dazed Rabbit Mask and hits THE CHOMP! DK goes for the cover. Chad attempts to get back into the ring and break up the pin, but is unsuccessful as DK retains his Intercontinental title.
WINNER in 23:52, and still OOWF Intercontinental Champion, DK Murphy.
Russ: And the kid retains his title! Have I mentioned how nice it is to see the Chomp again?
Razz: A nice tribute to Outback Jack for sure. I have to wonder now, what is next for DK Murphy? Chad has said that he wants the Onslaught title, and Folz wants the world title. Rabbit Mask…..well who knows what he wants?
Nash: As long as Murphy has that title, he is a target, someone will step up week in and week out to take it from him. Make no mistake about that. The kid showed a lot in this match, but the match is over, you better be ready for the next one.
Russ: I have no doubt Murphy will be ready for anything thrown at him. He has come a very long way in a very short time. Folks, it’s time for our main event, and what a combustible match this is! Firewoman defends the OOWF World Heavyweight title against Ghosthead, Chris Evans and Stan Fulton
Razz: You know, I am going to go right ahead and say it, I think Stan Fulton walks out of this match with the title
Nash: Fulton?
Razz: Yes. People are treating him as an afterthought, but the man is a former world champion. He is no lightweight. He is not some rookie who is just happy to be there. And he is smart. Fire, Ghost and Evans are going to do their best to murder one another, I think Fulton seizes the opportunity and takes the win and the title
Russ: That is an interesting theory Razz. These Dance of Death matches are the hardest for the champions, you have three people to beat, all of whom are gunning for you. You have to survive that, and with Evans and Ghost hunting her, Fire is in a bad way tonight
Nash: guys, what you are forgetting is that Fire THRIVES in situations like this. The more you back her into a corner, the more vicious she becomes. Need I remind you of match seven?
Russ: I would rather never think about that slaughter again
Nash: My point is, of all people here, I think Fire is the underdog. She has the most to lose
Russ: I do believe Fire would rather die than relinquish that title, so taking it from her is going to take a spectacular effort. Folks we are ready for the main event, let’s go to the ring!
