Post by BookerShark on Jul 31, 2013 20:44:58 GMT -5
OOWF Midweek Mayhem
Live from Stillwater, Oklahoma
Wednesday, July 31st 2013
Pretty Hate Machine (Firewoman & Miranda) vs. Banned from Everywhere
Banned From Everywhere is out first, slapping faces, shaking babies and kissing hands as always. The crowd decides to completely ignore their theme music and sings The Dukes of Hazzard” for some awful reason. “Just the Good Ol’ Boys…Never Meaning No Harm…”
Firewoman and Miranda make their way out next, reasonably baffled, but they get a big ol’ pop from the fans as well, who appreciate the deep and abiding respect Firewoman showed their culture the last time she was here. Ahem. Anyway, Firewoman starts against Awesome Bill, which starts off with a lockup and Fire’s technical skill twisting Bill into an octopus and all sorta shellfish, until Bill pops her one in the mouth just like Bill’s lobster grandpa used t’ do!
Anyway, after the shot, the two come at each other with some old-style brawling. Fire is quick, but Bill has a lot of power behind his fists, and he ends up trapping Firewoman in the corner. Bill backs up and goes for the splash—Fire dodges and precisely catches him in the head with a kick, and another! Fire plays her offense as defense, sometimes swinging not to connect but to dodge. Bill charges forward, Fire spins and leaps with an kick to the back of the head! Bill stumbles around but Firewoman leaps for an attempted CODEBREAKER—but Bill throws Fire over the head with a backbody drop! A technical reversal! Check that shit out everyone! Bill salutes the crowd—except that the capable Firewoman totally landed on her feelt, and Fire drops him with a superkick. Whoops.
Firewoman with a two-count off the kick—it’s not Super if it ain’t your official finisher—and she moves into a guillotine choke on the big man. Bill stumbles a little, but he charges Fire into her corner and—claiming the blindest of blind tags—throws Miranda in the hard way. Bill comes at Miranda with clubbing blows, but she flips him over fireman-carry style and hits him with a few sharp kicks to the back before a flipping neckbreaker gets two. Miranda locks a sharp chinlock on the back, but Bill fights up and huffs and puffs his way to the tag.
Now Justin and Miranda are staring down...Miranda curtsies at Justin, and he curtsies back. After a lockup that goes nowhere, Justin grabs Miranda’s wrist and twists into a wrist lock…but doesn’t seems sure where to go from there, spinning a few times, grabbing her ankle, rolling over her back and somehow landing in a MARK HENRY ARMBAR! Justin Sane seems surprised by his good fortune, yelling “Hey Bill, I got me an armbar on!”
Awesome Bill provides Justin some positive reinforcements…until Ecosystem comes out with a guitar!
Eco: Howdy, y’all! Don’t let me interrupt y’all’s match here, but we’re here in Stillwater, Oklahoma…and maybe I wasn’t around for last year’s party…but I just felt the need to sing a little diddy.
Eco: OOOOOOKLAHOMA where the wind comes sweepin' down the plain!
And the wavin' wheat can sure smell sweet, When the wind comes right behind the raaaaaaain!
Awesome Bill is covering his ears in pain. Firewoman goes to steal Eco’s guitar as Eco hustles up the ramp. Inside the ring, Justin releases his armbar to grab a jug from the side (how’d that get there), and starts to play along. As Justin is playing, Miranda rolls up Justin—who accidentally drops the jug onto his head! 1-2-3!
Winners in 8:22…Pretty Hate Machine!
Eco immediately stops playing the guitar as Firewoman hears the announcement. He flashes a thumbs-up to Miranda and winks at Fire as he exits.
The Word vs. Mai Muyo
The Word comes out first to Bach’s haunting Fugue in D Minor, accompanied by Father Lou, who looks exultant as the announcers talk about The Word’s astounding (if less than clean) victory against Alexander Darling at BLOODY FRONTIERS. Word just stares ahead at the ramp…
PA: “Who’s gonna fight for the weak, who’s gonna make them believe?”
The now-former Intercontinental Champion, Mai Muyo, makes her way out to the top of the ramp. She looks down at first and then up to the ring…almost coldly? She walks into the ring, straight at Father Lou and yells “SHAME!” at him until The Word steps between. The referee rings the bell and this match is on.
Mai paces slowly around the ring, but The Word backs her into the corner and goozles her, throwing her across the ring. Word charges with a big splash to the comparatively-lightweight Mai, who gives up over 100 pounds to the 313-pounder. Word forces Mai down into an abdominal stretch, driving elbows into the side of Mai Muyo to inflict more pain. Mai struggles, but The Word has a lot of strength and girth alike pushing down. Father Lou antagonizes Mai from the outside, calling on her to quit…
…and then something snaps.
Mai twists her leg out from Word’s precarious hold, and pops her knee up into his face one-two-three times! Word stumbles back—nose likely still hurting from his match with Alexander—and Mai nails him with a dropkick to the face! The Word pulls himself up by the ropes, Mai bounds off the opposite—Mai hits a 619! (Or should that be a +001 81 52?) The Word gets knocked back, but rolls out of the ring to recover!
Mai bounds off the opposite ropes and leaps with a Suicide Dive—but Father Lou pulls The Word out of the way and Mai crashes head-first into the announcers’ table, barely blocking the impact with her arm. The Word—who seems to have had the past night’s wound reopened, since we see a red dot—stomps on her neck twice to boos, before throwing her back in the ring by her hair.
As The Word steps in the ring, however—Mai suddenly kips up, and POPS The Word right in the face with a Superwoman Punch! Mai grabs Word’s neck to tackle him to the ground and begins to drive elbows into his face relentlessly! Word gets up with Mai on his back, his mask getting redder and redder as the elbows make contact with his nose, and finally slams her down! Like a woman possessed, however, she leaps back up for a Lou Thesz press—but he catches her! He tries to go for the Powerbomb but…
YOU CAN’T POWERBOMB MAI MUYO!
Mai flips the big man with a hurricarana that lays him out flat! At this point, Father Lou runs in toward Mai—but Mai catches him with the Trinitarian Choke! Mai seems to have forgotten her respect for men of the cloth, as the priest is flailing—until The Word comes in and STOMPS Mai in the chest to take her off. As Father Lou rolls out, The Word slingshots Mai into the ropes—but Mai catches herself on the second rope, spinning RVD kick to The Word, whose vision remains obscured by blood! He’s stumbling but not down—Mai hooks the neck, twists it behind—END-IS-HERE! Mai stops for a second and looks to the top rope—she bounds up—she spins not once but nearly twice—SAVIOR SPLASH for a big pop, and a pinfall!
Winner in 9:34…MAI MUYO!
Mai gets an ovation as she kneels in the middle of the ring, looking at The Word rolling over beside her. She looks down, mutters something, crosses herself and takes an exit.
Jason Allen vs. Chris Evans
Evans is introduced first, ignoring the massive boos from the crowd. Evans waits in the middle of the ring as Jason Allen makes his way out to a huge ovation. The bell rings and this one is underway.
Collar and Elbow tie up to start and Jason pushes Evans back into the corner for a clean break. They lock up again, and again Jason breaks clean but this time Evans reaches over the referee and slaps Jason hard in the face. Jason looks to retaliate, but Evans backs into the ropes and demands a clean break. Evans smirks as Jason backs into the center of the ring, only to have that smile quickly knocked off his face as he comes out of the corner and gets drilled with a powerful lariat. Jason waits for Evans to stagger back to his feet before drilling him with a damn impressive enziguiri.
For the next few minutes, the two competitors go back and forth, neither able to get much of an advantage. Evans wrestles surprisingly clean. The end comes when Jason goes for the Royal Flush, only to have Evans reverse and hit the Way of the Future. Evans covers, 1...2...3.
Winner by pinfall in 8:45, Chris Evans
Danny Taylor vs. Stank
"BOOM" Here comes Taylor. The crowd goes wild, and then they turn to boos when Stank comes out. The two look at each other. Stank glares. Danny merely smiles. Stank bares his teeth. Danny smiles. Stank growls and clenches his fists in rage. Danny smiles and mouths the word "Boom!" The crowd goes wild. Stank has had enough and tells the referee, "Ring the damn bell!" The referee complies and wow, do the two big men lay into each other! Big rights and a few lefts are exchanged. Lots of big man offense, with many a suplex, back body drop, and assorted other heavy duty slams to the mat, each of them echoing through the arena. Stank whips Danny into the corner and follows him in with a HUGE splash. He punctuates that with a couple of chops that would make the Big Show stand up and take notice. Danny crumples at first but on the third chop Danny catches Stank's hand and the two have a bit of a strength contest as Danny maneuvers Stank away from the corner and to the center with some wrist lock maneuvers. He gets Stank to the center, and hits a T-bone suplex and goes for a pin...one, tw- Stank kicks out.
Stank sits up and Danny hits the ropes and then missile drop kicks Stank back to the mat. Danny makes another pin, one...two...NOPE!
Both men get to their feet. Stank turns quicker though, and grabs Danny by the back of the head and drops to one knee...SHITFACED! Danny falls backward, and Stank hits the mat...one...two...NO! Danny gets a shoulder up.
Stank helps Danny to his feet, head between his legs and lifts him up and SLAM! Powerbomb number one! Stank does it again, and SLAM! Powerbomb number two! He's going for the Stankonia 2.0! He gets Danny to his feet again, and up and...NO! Danny shifts his weight and Stank falls backward. Danny pins him with a Thesz press, one...two...NO! Stank kicks out!
Meanwhile, Moosehead Jack comes walkng down the ring. The referee casts an uneasy eye at him, but Moose holds his hands up in mock innocence. The referee turns back to the action which has Danny standing, and Stank in the double underhook, and WHAM! Dynamine Drop! One...two...Moose grabs Stank's foot and puts it on the ropes, and then points to the foot to get the referees attention. However, the referee already knows the foot was there, as he saw Moose put it there. He calls for the bell and disqualifies Stank.
Your winner via DQ in 11:17, Danny Taylor
Ghosthead vs. Daniella Murphy
Sevendust’s “My Ruin” brings Ghosthead to the ring first and he’s focused and intent coming off his loss at Bloody Frontiers. And that’s not good news for Daniella Murphy who’s on her way to the ring after Ghosthead. On any other night, maybe Ghosthead would have taken the female Murphy lightly, but it doesn’t seem like he’s in that sort of mood. For one of the first times in the OOWF, DM comes into the match as the smaller wrestler, but it’s not a massive discrepancy.
We get a bell and early on it’s just a slugfest as Daniella refuses to give an inch to the bigger and stronger Ghosthead. Deep behind his white dreadlocks and nearly dead eyes, you can almost see a flicker of respect by Ghosthead, but he doesn’t let off the throttle at all. DM is giving everything she has and it’s slowly wearing Ghosthead down, but the damage he is doing seems to supersedes that. Ghosthead drags Daniella to her feet and shows off his strength as he presses Murphy over his head, but she rolls off his hands and lands on her feet and she lifts the massive Ghosthead up with her hand…CHOKEBOMB. The ref drops down and makes the cover…
1…
2…
Kick out. Murphy stays on the attack as she tries to pull off the upset. She gets Ghosthead to his feet and tries to pull him in for a SHORT-ARM CLOTHESLINE, but GH ducks under and winds up behind Murphy and he picks her up…BACKDROP DRIVER and Ghosthead holds on as he rolls them both to their feet and manipulates Daniella into position for the HORROR DRIVER. Ghost makes a cover, but somehow Daniella has enough left to kick out at 2 and ¾. Ghosthead could have let that throw him off his game, but he doesn’t as he drags Murphy to her feet…Irish Whip and Ghosthead gets massive height as he jumps and wraps his legs around Daniella’s head…PHANTASMAGORIA and he’s got it in the center of the ring. DM fights it and tries to get towards the ropes, but she’s having no luck and finally can’t handle it anymore and taps out.
Your winner in 14:44, Ghosthead
Matt Folz vs. LD Williams vs. Tommy Wilder
All three men are in the ring after the lengthy entrances and referee Mel Creech has given the instructions. He calls for the bell.
Before the reverberations of the bell have faded, Williams is running straight at Folz, but Wilder pulls off a standing dropkick in a nanosecond that has Williams knocked into next week. He rolls out of the ring onto the floor and Folz and Wilder lock up.
Folz turns the lockup into a side headlock and he releases that and switches into an arm bar. Wilder flips over and reverses it, but Folz is the wily veteran and he gets Wilder back into the arm bar without difficulty.
Wilder gets his feet going, climbs up the corner and runs the top rope with Folz holding on the whole time. Wilder actually runs from one corner to another, finally leaping off and pulling Folz over with a one arm snap mare.
Wilder nails Folz with a shining wizard! Cover! Folz kicks out after 1½. Wilder is quickly back up and climbing the turnbuckle. He poses and that’s just the opening the recovering Williams needs. LD is up on the apron and shoves Wilder off the top rope and Wilder falls to the floor and clotheslines himself on the guardrail. Wilder clutches his throat and is writhing in pain.
LD climbs in the ring as Folz is pulling himself to his feet. The two men lock eyes and then it’s on.
Folz and Williams trade punches, then forearms, then European uppercuts. Neither man is getting an advantage.
The next five minutes are a fanboy’s wet dream. Folz strings a series of suplexes (T-bone and German mostly) together followed by Williams with a display of power moves, including spinebusters and a pretty wheelbarrow suplex. Williams finally gets a short-armed clothesline nailed perfectly and goes for the cover.
Williams gets a two and a half as Folz rolls the shoulder at the last possible moment. Williams starts jawing with Mel Creech about implications of Jeremy Maclin’s injury on his fantasy football team. While Williams is explaining his set of keepers to Creech, Folz has risen to his feet and explodes at Williams as LD turns around with a spear!
Both men are rolling around on the mat in pain, but Folz is the first to recover enough as he locks in a good STF on Williams. This might be it as Folz has it positioned perfectly in the middle of the ring.
The crowd stirs as help has arrived for LD Williams. Chloe is out and she slides into the ring behind both Creech and Folz. Chloe slams her arm up under Creech right in the twig and berries. Creech goes down and curls up like a Cheeto. While Creech is down, Chloe slams her branding iron across Folz’s noggin.
Folz is laid out and Williams is panting, trying to catch his breath. Folz rolls out of the ring to try to avoid the crazy Saint, but Chloe follows him right out nearly climbing over LD to get there.
Williams finally realizes what’s going on and he climbs to his feet and leans over the rope. He yells at Chloe, “What are you doing out here?” but Chloe is oblivious to everything but the blood flying off the forehead of Folz and the crunch of his ankle as she alternates her branding iron shots between head and leg.
LD has finally given up trying to get through to Chloe and turns around... right into the recovered Tommy Wilder! AIRWALK! What a beautiful maneuver. Wilder is up quickly and grabs Creech and shakes him into consciousness.
Wilder quickly then over to Williams. BUZZ KILL! Perfectly placed in the middle of the ring. Williams tries to hold on, but there’s no getting out of this one. Williams taps.
YOUR WINNER by submission in 11:10... TOMMY WILDER!
Wilder doesn’t waste any time celebrating as he sees Chloe reveling in the blood splatter. He runs the ropes and SUICIDE PLANCHA right onto Chloe! Chloe slams hard into the ringside barrier and Wilder is cushioned by Chloe’s body. He’s up quickly. White Hats and Saints are both pouring from the dressing rooms and each group carries away their respective members leaving Matt Folz laying alone in a growing pool of his own blood. OOWF Medical is out in their dear, sweet time and starts again the process of putting Folz back together.
Saints of Sinners (Christian Carter & Chloe) vs. The Darlings
No love lost between these four competitors. Extra referees are called to ringside for this one. L four are introduced and Alexis and Chloe start things off. The two of them meet in the middle of the ring with a stare down of pure hatred. Chloe bellows like a wounded animal and NAILS Alexis with a forearm to the side of the head. Alexis counters with a chop that echoes in the rafters. Then a forearm. Then a chop. Then a forearm. Chop. Forearm. Chop. Forearm. The crowd did the alternating YAY! BOO! thing each time. The two nearly hammer one another into oblivion before a burst of energy sends Alexis in to a rage and she backs Chloe into the corner with chops. Alexis climbs to the middle rope and rains punches down on Chloe’s head, hitting ten, then leaping back to the mat and charging in and catching her with a knee to the face. Chloe is stunned. Alexis grabs her by the head and charges out of the corner for a bulldog, but Carter comes into the ring and nearly takes her head off with a big boot to the face! Alexis hits the mat hard and grabs her jaw, Alexander races into the ring and catches Carter with a punch to the jaw, but the damage has already been done.
As the referee escorts Alex out of the ring, Chloe grabs her and sends her to the ropes and catches her on the rebound with a thunderous SPINEBUSTER! Chloe pulls Alexis to the apron, letting her head hang off the apron and drops an elbow down across her throat. Chloe slides into the ring and tags Carter, who runs down the apron and drops a leg across her throat driving her to the floor. Inside the ring, Alex has seen enough. He gets into the ring and charges at the ropes, ducking a Chloe clothesline attempt and dives between the ropes and slams into Carter, sending him crashing into the guardrail. Chloe comes out after Alex, grabbing him from behind. Carter regains his composure and tries a big boot to Alex, but Alex moves at the last second and he catches Chloe right on the jaw spinning her around. Alex grabs her and hits a GERMAN SUPLEX on the floor, then gets to his feet and charges at Carter and cuts him in half with a SPEAR! SPEAR! SPEAR!
Alex grabs Carter and rolls him into the ring and follows, mounting him and hammering him with punches to the face. The referee begins a five count, since Alex is not the legal man. Finally Alex breaks and heads to the corner, and the ref starts the ten count on Alexis. Alexis climbs onto the apron and is about to get into the ring when Chloe gets underneath her and POWERBOMBS her into the guardrail! Alex races around the ring and catches Chloe with a right cross sending her to the ground. The referee restarts his count and orders Alex back to his corner. While he is doing this, Carter slips out of the ring and grabs Lexie’s Intercontinental title and waits for her to struggle to her feet, then PASTES her in the face! Alexis hits the floor hard. Carter ditches the title and grabs a handful of hair and pulls Lexie to her feet, she has been busted wide open. Carter rolls her into the ring and casually follows and lays across her, one…..two…..thre…..NO! Alexis grabs Carter in a crucifix and rolls his shoulders to the mat, one, two, thre….NO! Carter kicks out at the last second. He quickly gets to his feet and catches Alexis with a kick to the head that keeps her on the mat.
Carter drags Alexis to the Saints corner and tags in Chloe, Chloe drops a knee across her throat and keeps it there until the referee threatens disqualification. She snarls at the ref and lets up, pulling Lexie to her feet and sending her to the ropes. On the rebound, Chloe hits a BRUTAL chlothesline that nearly takes Lexie out of her boots. Chloe covers, but Lexie rolls her shoulder at two. Chloe snarls again and pulls her up and throws her into the corner and charges in and catches her with a knee to the face. Alexis falls to the mat and Chloe repeatedly slams her knee into Alexis’ face until she is down on the mat. Chloe drags Alexis to the middle of the ring then heads to the corner and tries a MOONSAULT, but Alex races down the apron and clips Chloe’s foot, dropping her on the turnbuckle. Alexis manages to get to her feet and heads to the corner and grabs Chloe by the head and DRIVES her to the mat with a NECKBREAKER! Both women are down and the crowd is screaming for Alexis to make the tag to Alex. She crawls slowly, slowly, slowly……Chloe manages to rolls to her corner and tag in Carter, Carter charges across the ring and grabs Lexie by the foot, but she rolls over and repeatedly kicks him in the knee, then catches him with a shot that may not have been quite legal, doubling Carter over in pain. Lexie rolls free and makes the HOT TAG to Alex!
Alex charges into the ring and catches Carter with a spinning front kick to the face that sends him to the mat. He gets up and charges into the saints corner and knocks Chloe to the floor with a forearm, then slides out of the ring and grabs her by the hair and throws her face first into the ring post. As she staggers backward, Alex flips her the bird, Chloe snarls and charges, but Alex takes her down with a drop toe hold that sends her ad first into the ring steps. Chloe remains motionless on the floor. Alex slides back into the ring just as Carter stands up and POPS him with a SUPERKICK! Carter doesn’t go down, but his lights have been dimmed. Alex calls Alexis into the ring and the siblings lift Carter in a suplex, then drop him stomach first on the top rope! Alex grabs Carter by the head and pulls him off the ropes (like the set up for a Randy Orton DDT) while Alexis climbs to the top rope. She leaps and hits a WARRIOR STOMP on Carter’s back as Alex PLANTS him with a DDT!
Alex doesn’t even try for a cover, rolling him over instead and hammering him with punches to the face. Soon enough, Carter is bleeding badly. He reaches up and gouges Alex’s eyes sending him staggering. Carter slowly gets to his feet and tries to charge at Darling, but he connects with a low drop kick to the knee that sends Carter right back to the mat. Alex pounces and grabs Carter’s leg and traps him in the FIGURE FOUR! Carter howls in pain but refuses to tap out. Alex reaches out and tags Alexis, but doesn’t release the hold. Lexie charges into the ring and catches Carter with a STIFF kick to the head, that can’t do any wonders for his possible concussion. Carter is flat on the mat, Alexis covers, but Carter kicks out at two.
Alex gets to his feet and wanders a little too close to the ropes. On the outside, Chloe has recovered and she grabs Alex’s legs and pulls him out of the ring and nails Alex with a punch. Alex staggers and we see why, Chloe has a chain wrapped around her fist. With blood pouring down her head, she goes after Alex, chasing him around the ring hammering him with punches to the face, opening several gashes on his head. Chloe finally ditches the chain and connects with a low blow, then lifts Alex for the CORKSCREW on the floor! Inside the ring, Alexis is trying to set Carter up for the BITCH KILLER, but she sees Alex in trouble and abandons the move and slides out of the ring and catches Chloe with a kick to the ribs that sends both her and Alex over the guardrail into the first row of fans.
Alexis slides back into the ring, but Carter is waiting for her and catches her with a spinning back fist to the side of the head. Alexis staggers and Carter grabs her and hits a BUCKLE BOMB! As Alexis staggers forward, Carter kicks her in the gut and lifts her for the FINAL TESTIMONY but Alexis shits in mid move and rolls Carter into a SMALL PACKAGE for a two count! Carter gets to his feet quickly and he and Alexis go toe to toe trading chops and kicks with neither going down, but both of them on rubber legs. Carter swings wildly and Alexis ducks it, races to the corner and springs off the middle turnbuckle and catches Carter with the LETHAL INJECTION! Before Alexis can get to her feet though, Chloe is back into the ring and she grabs Alexis by the legs and starts a GIANT SWING! They go round and round and round and finally Carter gets up, and as Alexis comes around, Carter catches her with a NASTY kick to the head! Alexis might be out cold!
From the outside, Alex grabs Carter and pulls him out of the ring, Alex’s face is a crimson mask. He hammers Carter with punches to the face, then sits him in a chair, climbs onto the apron and races down the apron and leaps and catches Carter with a SICK KICK! Inside the ring, Chloe has managed to get back to her feet, she pulls a barely conscious Lexie to her feet and lifts her and hits the WIDOWS PEAK! Chloe has no intention of covering Alexis though, she leaves the ring and reaches under the apron and pulls out HAPPY DETH BAT! Chloe slowly climbs back onto the apron, but Alex stops her before she can get into the ring. The two of them fight it out on the apron trading punches and kicks and gouging eyes and biting, pretty much everything. Finally, with both of them holding onto the top rope, throwing punches Chloe grabs Alex and lifts him up, but Alex lands one more punch (which, we now see HIM wearing a chain around his fist) and they both fall off the apron and crash through the Slovakian Announce table! OH MY GOD!
Carter slowly slides into the ring, he is pouring blood and glassy eyed. He grabs Lexie by the hair and shoves her into the corner, lifts her up and sets her on the top rope and climbs up for a SUPERPLEX, but that isn’t quite enough. He pulls her up until they are both on the top rope. Lexie fights the move and they both teeter precariously on the top rope, Lexie manages to hit Carter with a HARD forearm that sends him flying into the middle of the ring, where he lands HARD on the back of his head. Lexie cannot keep her balance though and she tumbles off the top rope, SLAMS hard onto the apron, then falls to the floor! All four are down, the referees check on all four, then decide enough is enough, he waves to the back for medical help and declares the match a no-contest.
WINNER – No Contest in 33:33
Onslaught Title Match
Amazing Jos © vs. Jeremy Punswick
Budgie's I TURNED TO STONE plays and out comes Jeremy Punswick accompanied by Chloe. She has what looks to be a book with her and is jabbering about what's in the book. They seem to be in an animated discussion and ignoring most of the crowd's dislike of the Saints. Chloe has the book at ringside as Punswick gets into the ring...
And North West's daddy's AMAZING brings the Amazing Jos into the ring. Jos sees his long time enemy and Chloe and is animatedly calling them out. Chloe just holds up the book, that we see now has “Rule Book” plainly written on the outside, and indicates to the referee that she is just there to help. The referee warns her to stay out of the match and orders the referee to ring the bell.
The two big men lock up in the middle of the ring and Jos backs Puns into the ropes and pats him on the face while making a clean break. That riles up Punswick but Chloe just looks at him to settle down. They lock up again and Puns once again gets pushed back and Jos again pats him on the face as he breaks clean. Puns is steaming and the referee says something to Jos but Jos just winks at the ref. Another lockup in the middle of the ring and once again Jos pushes Puns back and starts to pat Punswick put Puns grabs his mask and turns him into the corner and punches him with several hard rights and then goes to throw Jos across the ring but Jos reverses and Puns runs into an Oh Em Gee and goes flying out of the ring. Meanwhile the referee signals the penalty.
Jeremy Punswick has used his first warning
Punswick is livid at ringside as Chloe points to the book and holds up three fingers. Chloe tries to settle Punswick down and she is not very successful as the referee's count reaches 12. Finally at about 16 Punswick tries to get back into the ring but then points at Jos claiming he was trying to interfere which causes the referee to push back Jos and break the count. Punswick enters the ring a bit calmer. He locks up with Jos and forces Jos into the corner, throws him across the ring and goes to follow up with a kick but Jos dodges at the last second and Punswick goes flying, Jos hits a hard kick and then gets out of the way as Puns is tangled in the turnbuckle. Chloe complains to the referee which is totally ignored.
Punswick charges and starts hitting hard forearm shots and elbow strikes and whips Jos across the ring and lets loose with a hard clothesline. Punswick drops a knee on Jos shoulder and begins dropping knees across the arm of Jos before locking in a Fujiwari Armbar! Jos tries to regain a vertical base but Puns has it cinched in solid. Jos kicks and wiggles his way to the ropes.
Amazing Jos has used his first rope break
The referee calls for the break but Puns begins dropping knees across the arm and torques Jos arm around the bottom ring rope before stomping on the arm just before the count of five.
Jeremy Punswick has used his second warning
Chloe is incensed and jumps up on the apron claiming the referee is double penalizing Punswick. As the argument progresses Punswick low blows Jos and hits a huge Suplex. Puns covers and Chloe points back to the ring. The delay means Puns only gets a two count, but it was the opening he was waiting for. Puns opens up with full force, being careful to keep it within the rules. He targets the arms of Jos, and once again goes for a Fujiwari Armbar. But Jos is again too close to the ropes and he forces the break.
Amazing Jos has used his second rope break
Punswick instinctively goes to follow up but Chloe yells and holds up three fingers and Puns backs away. Jos gets back to his feet and Punswick backs Jos into the ropes and throws him across the ring. Spinebuster! Punswick covers but only gets a two count. Punswick picks up Jos, Belly to Belly Suplex. Punswick covers for yet another two count as the ringside announcer calls the ten minute mark. Chloe pounds the mat and yells “Finish Him!” Punswick picks up Jos going for the Extinction Level Event, but Jos rolls him up in a small package for a two count. Punswick is enraged but Jos gets his flying feet in gear and starts throwing elbows and feet and knocks him over with an Oh Em Gee! Jos covers Puns but Puns gets his foot over the ropes.
Jeremy Punswick has used his first rope break
Punswick stands up and runs right into a face slap from Jos. Jos begins peppering Puns with chops and elbows. Jos picks up Punswick for Shut the Hell Up but Punswick grabs the ropes.
Jeremy Punswick has used his second rope break
Chloe pounds the mat again and yells at Punswick, who steps into another slap in the face from Jos. Jos just stands there as Punswick fumes. Jos calls Punswick a pussy and slaps him again, and Punswick hits the ropes and flies into Jos with fists a flying. Chloe screams and the referee turns to the announcer.
Jeremy Punswick has used his final warning
Punswick is furious and shoves the referee, picks up Jos and slams him to the mat and resumes punching away. The referee has no alternative but to call for the bell.
Winner by disqualification in 13:33 and STILL Onslaught Champion – Amazing Jos
Chloe rolls into the ring and puts the book in the ring near the corner as she joins Punswick in kicking the crap out of the Onslaught Champion. Chloe has Punswick pick up Jos, she grabs the book, and SLAMS it into the head of Jos. She opens the book and pulls two sets of barbed wire brass knuckles out of it, hands one to Punswick, then they start punching away on Jos. Chloe pitches the book back near the corner, Punswick picks up Jos, Chloe climbs the turnbuckle. SPIKE EXTINCTION LEVEL EVENT on Jos! Salvation and Mai Muyo run down to try to intevene, but Punswick and Chloe bail out of the ring and head through the crowd to the back, laughing and high fiving all the way.
OOWF World Tag Team Title Match
Texpress © vs. Salvation
Texpress is out first—and man, does the Oklahoma crowd hate Texpress. They are not big fans of that Texpress, no siree. Nothing tangles the ol’ Oklahoma catchin’ tails more than ol’ Texpress makin’ they way down the ring, saying all sorta nice things about Texas. The Oklahoma fans do not like that, I tell you, they do not like that thing at all, and they are expressin’ their displeasure with all kinds of doings, like booing, or saying they don’t like Texas none. Because no siree, they do not like Texas none, nor Texpress, on account of their likin’ Texas.
No siree. They do not like Texas none. And when Chad Madison cups his ol’ hand to the ol’ ear, no siree, the fans do not like that. They understand that ol’ Madison is tryin’ to get the jump on them, pull over the ol’ polecat, tryin’ to play along to the aforementioned expressions of not likin’ Texpress, which the crowd happens to be makin’, which again is coming in the form of hootin’ and hollerin’, but not the kind they would use for sports teams and the like which they like, because they do not like Texpress, no sir, on account of their affiliatin’ with Texas, which the Oklahoma fans do not like, on account of livin’ in Oklahoma, which is a separate state from Texas altogether, just like Quebec is a separate province from Newfoundland, and we all know that much of Quebec wants to secede—which is THEIR GOD-GIVEN RIGHT—but you can imagine that Quebec ain’t a real big fan of the rest of Canada, on account of them wantin’ to leave it, so you better believe that the Quebec don’t give one hootentoot about Newfoundland, since they barely give such a hootentoot about Canada, and Quebec is in Canada, so they must like some part of Canada, that is to say they probably consider themselves friendly with Quebec, on account of bein’ Quebec, but ain’t none of Newfoundland in Quebec, and ain’t none of Quebec in Newfoundland, so you can bet yer tighty-wighties Quebec don’t like Newfoundland none, which is to say that these separate provinces don’t like each other none—or maybe Newfoundland is neutral, and dammit Newfoundland take a damn side—but that is to say that states don’t like each other none, especially if they ain’t the same state, but sometimes even then what with a West Virginia and the long, complicated history of the War of Northern Aggression, but this is all to say that on account of Oklahoma bein’ a separate state, and not likin’ Texas all that much, which is to say they ain’t bosom-buddies, when Chad Madison cups his hand to his ear, the fans don’t like it much, no sir.
At this point, Salvation makes their appearance, and the fans go a’hootin and hollerin’—in a good way this time for NASCAR Stan and his wacky people-eatin’ Jap sidekick. Someone throws Ecosystem a human finger, and Eco doesn’t really know how to react…so he signs it and throws it back in the audience. That’s worth good money! Anyway, Eco and Stan are nowhere in as jovial a mood as the fans, as they’ve had their pre-talk, and Eco goes right in the ring, nose-to-nose with Chad.
The two lock up to start, zero pleasantries from Eco, and Eco somehow forces Chad down to one knee…Chad with the armbar takeover, Eco spins on the ground for leverage, pushes up, gets a snapmare into a chinlock on Chad. Chad pops Eco in the nose, but Eco doesn’t let go…Chad fights up, elbows into Eco’s gut, whips Eco into the ropes, Eco comes up with the Lou Thesz Press, Chad ducks, both off opposite ropes, Chad leaps with the crossbody, Eco catches Chad! Eco throws Chad with the Last Call, but Chad spins midair and lands on his feet. Eco spins around and charges, Chad superkicks, Eco matrixes under and rolls away! Both circle each other, charge into another lockup, Chad drops back to monkey flip Eco—and now it’s Eco’s turn to land on his feet, Chad turns around, right into Eco’s Superkick! (Long-time fans remember it as stolen from Ravenna Blue.) Eco goes for the pin, Zane breaks that right up, though Chad wasn’t likely to stay down anyway.
Eco stays in Zane’s face a bit too long, Chad gets a rollup, 1-2-Eco kicks out fast, like a scared raccoon flailing. Now Chad is coming in with those educated feet, kicking Eco hard in the chest. Eco begins to exchange the shots, but Chad gets the better and winds up another set of knees, chest kicks (Eco’s chest is RED) and finally nailing him with a Vintage Chad Dropkick!
Eco goes down…and comes up with a ROARING kip-up…but which we mean, Eco literally roars at Chad Madison! Chad seems thrown for a second, as Eco leaps on him and begins pounding away on Chad’s face, suddenly stopping to claw! The referee stops Eco immediately, and Eco steps back and blinks. At this moment, Chad makes a dive to Zane and tags him in, and Zane blasts Eco down with a running shoulder block! Eco does a Ziggler flip into his corner! Sitting up, he is still blinking and Stan calls for the tag; Eco obliges.
It’s the big men now, and they choose to charge right at each other…Zane and Stan both swinging the big arms, Stan getting the better of the double clothesline attempt and knocking Zane down—but right after, Zane drop-toeholds the stumbling Stan down, grabbing the past-injured knee, but Stan kicks him right off, and the two bulls rise together, Zane smiling and Stan focused…after a few minutes of brawling, they back up for the bull position once more. Zane comes in with a lot of power, but Stan gets the best of the exchange, forcing Zane into the corner hard—Zane spins it around though, and starts knocking Stan’s head into the top turnbuckle! 1-2-3—but Stan suddenly headbutts the hard-headed Zane, and knocks his head into the turnbuckle and throws him back. Stan quickly ascends the turnbuckles…but it might be too soon, as Zane recovers quickly and throws Stan off the second rope to the mat, SHAKING the ring! Myers walks over to the large Stan Fulton and hooks him up for a Powerslam: BOOM!
Fulton is flat and Zane goes for the cover, but Stan was playing possum, grabbing the neck of Zane and pushing against his shin—it looks like Stan is borrowing Mai’s Trinitarian Choke, only it’s got about 200 more pounds from Stan the Man! Zane is struggling to find a way out…until he wedges his arms between and pulls Stan over into a half-Boston Crab!
Stan Fulton’s body was not made for pulling by the arms, especially with bad knees being twisted, and while he gamely pulls himself toward the ropes, it’s Eco’s turn to make a save, as only he can…
Eco: “Look! A Distraction!”
Referee: “Where?”
As the referee looks around, Eco leaps off the top rope and MISSILE DROPKICKS Zane Myers to break up the hold! Now Chad’s partner has been kicked and his move has been stolen, and the Cowboy does not cotton to that one bit! Cottoning is not a thing the Cowboy tends to do, and certainly not cottoning to thing, except perhaps of the lady variety, but not always even then, but he certainly doesn’t cotton to stealing, and he cottons even less to the stealing of his moves than he does to stealing, which is already none, so if you cotton less than none, you know what you get, don't ya, boy? Negative cotton. And that means that if you getting' negative cotton, you got negative cotton pickers, and if cotton-pickers are negative they sho' ain't positive, because negative and positive go together like oil and vinegar, which is to say, they go together like they ain't goin' together, which is to say not at all, so the aforementioned cottons pickers are not happy, no sire, and we's ain't talking' about pre-civil war times, so negative cotton pickers means unionizin' So, you know, hoo BOY is Chad man.
Chad runs in and tackles Eco down, and the two roll out of the ring, brawling. Meanwhile, Stan recovers before Zane, and nails the big man with an even bigger SPEAR! Zane flops down on his back in front of the turnbuckles as Stan prepares to ascend again…
…and here come the Saints of Sinners! Stank is in the ring first, slamming Stan to the ground off the turnbuckles! LD Williams grabs Chad off Eco on the outside and tosses him into the steel stairs, putting the boots to Eco next as the referee calls for the bell!
Winner in 21:21…No Contest!
The rest of the Sinners come down into the ring, beginning to put the boots to the big man Stan in the ring….outside the ring, Eco bites SHARPLY into the neck of LD Williams, who elbows him in the nose and tosses him into the lion’s den of the ring. Eco tries to bob and weave, even catching Jeremy Punswick with a shot of green mist on half the face, but a straight right from Stank takes him down as Salvation eats the beating…
…until the White Hats come down, Mai running out in front alongside Wilder and D&D, and the usual brawl unfolds—but this time, security is ready to break it up quickly, the fans booing—half for spoiling a good match, half for wanting to see the brawl continue
OOWF World Heavyweight Title
Moosehead Jack © vs. DK Murphy
Miscommunication on writing here. The match is a vicious brawl in the vein of Moose and Outback Jack for a new generation. Moose seems a bit shocked at how well DK is handling himself. Both men wind up bloody. But the lack of experience in this type of match finally takes its toll on DK and Moose is able to get him up for the GO TO SLEEP FOREVER before locking in the JI-ENDO and getting a win. Moose looks to continue the beating post-match but Danny Taylor is out to get in the way and that infuriates MHJ. He’s about to attack Danny but Daniella, Firewoman, Mai and Wilder are out as are the Saints and both sides decide on discretion for a change. The security guards with tasers are probably a factor. But the fleeting image is a Moose frothing at the mouth to get at Taylor.
Your winner in 21:04 and STILL World Heavyweight Champion, Moosehead Jack
Thanks for coming out and watching LIVE OOWF action! Be sure to check out the JUDGEMENT EVE 9, coming to you Live! Sunday August 25th from Tokyo, Japan! And don’t forget to catch next week’s OOWF Mid-Week Mayhem! Wednesday, August 7th ! From Sapporo, Japan. Did you see something you really liked? Post it here in the 2013 Awards Reminder Thread. Please join us for OOWF Chat on Wednesday nights! And be sure to check out the full OOWF Archive and read up on the 8-year plus history of the OOWF!
Live from Stillwater, Oklahoma
Wednesday, July 31st 2013
Pretty Hate Machine (Firewoman & Miranda) vs. Banned from Everywhere
Banned From Everywhere is out first, slapping faces, shaking babies and kissing hands as always. The crowd decides to completely ignore their theme music and sings The Dukes of Hazzard” for some awful reason. “Just the Good Ol’ Boys…Never Meaning No Harm…”
Firewoman and Miranda make their way out next, reasonably baffled, but they get a big ol’ pop from the fans as well, who appreciate the deep and abiding respect Firewoman showed their culture the last time she was here. Ahem. Anyway, Firewoman starts against Awesome Bill, which starts off with a lockup and Fire’s technical skill twisting Bill into an octopus and all sorta shellfish, until Bill pops her one in the mouth just like Bill’s lobster grandpa used t’ do!
Anyway, after the shot, the two come at each other with some old-style brawling. Fire is quick, but Bill has a lot of power behind his fists, and he ends up trapping Firewoman in the corner. Bill backs up and goes for the splash—Fire dodges and precisely catches him in the head with a kick, and another! Fire plays her offense as defense, sometimes swinging not to connect but to dodge. Bill charges forward, Fire spins and leaps with an kick to the back of the head! Bill stumbles around but Firewoman leaps for an attempted CODEBREAKER—but Bill throws Fire over the head with a backbody drop! A technical reversal! Check that shit out everyone! Bill salutes the crowd—except that the capable Firewoman totally landed on her feelt, and Fire drops him with a superkick. Whoops.
Firewoman with a two-count off the kick—it’s not Super if it ain’t your official finisher—and she moves into a guillotine choke on the big man. Bill stumbles a little, but he charges Fire into her corner and—claiming the blindest of blind tags—throws Miranda in the hard way. Bill comes at Miranda with clubbing blows, but she flips him over fireman-carry style and hits him with a few sharp kicks to the back before a flipping neckbreaker gets two. Miranda locks a sharp chinlock on the back, but Bill fights up and huffs and puffs his way to the tag.
Now Justin and Miranda are staring down...Miranda curtsies at Justin, and he curtsies back. After a lockup that goes nowhere, Justin grabs Miranda’s wrist and twists into a wrist lock…but doesn’t seems sure where to go from there, spinning a few times, grabbing her ankle, rolling over her back and somehow landing in a MARK HENRY ARMBAR! Justin Sane seems surprised by his good fortune, yelling “Hey Bill, I got me an armbar on!”
Awesome Bill provides Justin some positive reinforcements…until Ecosystem comes out with a guitar!
Eco: Howdy, y’all! Don’t let me interrupt y’all’s match here, but we’re here in Stillwater, Oklahoma…and maybe I wasn’t around for last year’s party…but I just felt the need to sing a little diddy.
Eco: OOOOOOKLAHOMA where the wind comes sweepin' down the plain!
And the wavin' wheat can sure smell sweet, When the wind comes right behind the raaaaaaain!
Awesome Bill is covering his ears in pain. Firewoman goes to steal Eco’s guitar as Eco hustles up the ramp. Inside the ring, Justin releases his armbar to grab a jug from the side (how’d that get there), and starts to play along. As Justin is playing, Miranda rolls up Justin—who accidentally drops the jug onto his head! 1-2-3!
Winners in 8:22…Pretty Hate Machine!
Eco immediately stops playing the guitar as Firewoman hears the announcement. He flashes a thumbs-up to Miranda and winks at Fire as he exits.
The Word vs. Mai Muyo
The Word comes out first to Bach’s haunting Fugue in D Minor, accompanied by Father Lou, who looks exultant as the announcers talk about The Word’s astounding (if less than clean) victory against Alexander Darling at BLOODY FRONTIERS. Word just stares ahead at the ramp…
PA: “Who’s gonna fight for the weak, who’s gonna make them believe?”
The now-former Intercontinental Champion, Mai Muyo, makes her way out to the top of the ramp. She looks down at first and then up to the ring…almost coldly? She walks into the ring, straight at Father Lou and yells “SHAME!” at him until The Word steps between. The referee rings the bell and this match is on.
Mai paces slowly around the ring, but The Word backs her into the corner and goozles her, throwing her across the ring. Word charges with a big splash to the comparatively-lightweight Mai, who gives up over 100 pounds to the 313-pounder. Word forces Mai down into an abdominal stretch, driving elbows into the side of Mai Muyo to inflict more pain. Mai struggles, but The Word has a lot of strength and girth alike pushing down. Father Lou antagonizes Mai from the outside, calling on her to quit…
…and then something snaps.
Mai twists her leg out from Word’s precarious hold, and pops her knee up into his face one-two-three times! Word stumbles back—nose likely still hurting from his match with Alexander—and Mai nails him with a dropkick to the face! The Word pulls himself up by the ropes, Mai bounds off the opposite—Mai hits a 619! (Or should that be a +001 81 52?) The Word gets knocked back, but rolls out of the ring to recover!
Mai bounds off the opposite ropes and leaps with a Suicide Dive—but Father Lou pulls The Word out of the way and Mai crashes head-first into the announcers’ table, barely blocking the impact with her arm. The Word—who seems to have had the past night’s wound reopened, since we see a red dot—stomps on her neck twice to boos, before throwing her back in the ring by her hair.
As The Word steps in the ring, however—Mai suddenly kips up, and POPS The Word right in the face with a Superwoman Punch! Mai grabs Word’s neck to tackle him to the ground and begins to drive elbows into his face relentlessly! Word gets up with Mai on his back, his mask getting redder and redder as the elbows make contact with his nose, and finally slams her down! Like a woman possessed, however, she leaps back up for a Lou Thesz press—but he catches her! He tries to go for the Powerbomb but…
YOU CAN’T POWERBOMB MAI MUYO!
Mai flips the big man with a hurricarana that lays him out flat! At this point, Father Lou runs in toward Mai—but Mai catches him with the Trinitarian Choke! Mai seems to have forgotten her respect for men of the cloth, as the priest is flailing—until The Word comes in and STOMPS Mai in the chest to take her off. As Father Lou rolls out, The Word slingshots Mai into the ropes—but Mai catches herself on the second rope, spinning RVD kick to The Word, whose vision remains obscured by blood! He’s stumbling but not down—Mai hooks the neck, twists it behind—END-IS-HERE! Mai stops for a second and looks to the top rope—she bounds up—she spins not once but nearly twice—SAVIOR SPLASH for a big pop, and a pinfall!
Winner in 9:34…MAI MUYO!
Mai gets an ovation as she kneels in the middle of the ring, looking at The Word rolling over beside her. She looks down, mutters something, crosses herself and takes an exit.
Jason Allen vs. Chris Evans
Evans is introduced first, ignoring the massive boos from the crowd. Evans waits in the middle of the ring as Jason Allen makes his way out to a huge ovation. The bell rings and this one is underway.
Collar and Elbow tie up to start and Jason pushes Evans back into the corner for a clean break. They lock up again, and again Jason breaks clean but this time Evans reaches over the referee and slaps Jason hard in the face. Jason looks to retaliate, but Evans backs into the ropes and demands a clean break. Evans smirks as Jason backs into the center of the ring, only to have that smile quickly knocked off his face as he comes out of the corner and gets drilled with a powerful lariat. Jason waits for Evans to stagger back to his feet before drilling him with a damn impressive enziguiri.
For the next few minutes, the two competitors go back and forth, neither able to get much of an advantage. Evans wrestles surprisingly clean. The end comes when Jason goes for the Royal Flush, only to have Evans reverse and hit the Way of the Future. Evans covers, 1...2...3.
Winner by pinfall in 8:45, Chris Evans
Danny Taylor vs. Stank
"BOOM" Here comes Taylor. The crowd goes wild, and then they turn to boos when Stank comes out. The two look at each other. Stank glares. Danny merely smiles. Stank bares his teeth. Danny smiles. Stank growls and clenches his fists in rage. Danny smiles and mouths the word "Boom!" The crowd goes wild. Stank has had enough and tells the referee, "Ring the damn bell!" The referee complies and wow, do the two big men lay into each other! Big rights and a few lefts are exchanged. Lots of big man offense, with many a suplex, back body drop, and assorted other heavy duty slams to the mat, each of them echoing through the arena. Stank whips Danny into the corner and follows him in with a HUGE splash. He punctuates that with a couple of chops that would make the Big Show stand up and take notice. Danny crumples at first but on the third chop Danny catches Stank's hand and the two have a bit of a strength contest as Danny maneuvers Stank away from the corner and to the center with some wrist lock maneuvers. He gets Stank to the center, and hits a T-bone suplex and goes for a pin...one, tw- Stank kicks out.
Stank sits up and Danny hits the ropes and then missile drop kicks Stank back to the mat. Danny makes another pin, one...two...NOPE!
Both men get to their feet. Stank turns quicker though, and grabs Danny by the back of the head and drops to one knee...SHITFACED! Danny falls backward, and Stank hits the mat...one...two...NO! Danny gets a shoulder up.
Stank helps Danny to his feet, head between his legs and lifts him up and SLAM! Powerbomb number one! Stank does it again, and SLAM! Powerbomb number two! He's going for the Stankonia 2.0! He gets Danny to his feet again, and up and...NO! Danny shifts his weight and Stank falls backward. Danny pins him with a Thesz press, one...two...NO! Stank kicks out!
Meanwhile, Moosehead Jack comes walkng down the ring. The referee casts an uneasy eye at him, but Moose holds his hands up in mock innocence. The referee turns back to the action which has Danny standing, and Stank in the double underhook, and WHAM! Dynamine Drop! One...two...Moose grabs Stank's foot and puts it on the ropes, and then points to the foot to get the referees attention. However, the referee already knows the foot was there, as he saw Moose put it there. He calls for the bell and disqualifies Stank.
Your winner via DQ in 11:17, Danny Taylor
Ghosthead vs. Daniella Murphy
Sevendust’s “My Ruin” brings Ghosthead to the ring first and he’s focused and intent coming off his loss at Bloody Frontiers. And that’s not good news for Daniella Murphy who’s on her way to the ring after Ghosthead. On any other night, maybe Ghosthead would have taken the female Murphy lightly, but it doesn’t seem like he’s in that sort of mood. For one of the first times in the OOWF, DM comes into the match as the smaller wrestler, but it’s not a massive discrepancy.
We get a bell and early on it’s just a slugfest as Daniella refuses to give an inch to the bigger and stronger Ghosthead. Deep behind his white dreadlocks and nearly dead eyes, you can almost see a flicker of respect by Ghosthead, but he doesn’t let off the throttle at all. DM is giving everything she has and it’s slowly wearing Ghosthead down, but the damage he is doing seems to supersedes that. Ghosthead drags Daniella to her feet and shows off his strength as he presses Murphy over his head, but she rolls off his hands and lands on her feet and she lifts the massive Ghosthead up with her hand…CHOKEBOMB. The ref drops down and makes the cover…
1…
2…
Kick out. Murphy stays on the attack as she tries to pull off the upset. She gets Ghosthead to his feet and tries to pull him in for a SHORT-ARM CLOTHESLINE, but GH ducks under and winds up behind Murphy and he picks her up…BACKDROP DRIVER and Ghosthead holds on as he rolls them both to their feet and manipulates Daniella into position for the HORROR DRIVER. Ghost makes a cover, but somehow Daniella has enough left to kick out at 2 and ¾. Ghosthead could have let that throw him off his game, but he doesn’t as he drags Murphy to her feet…Irish Whip and Ghosthead gets massive height as he jumps and wraps his legs around Daniella’s head…PHANTASMAGORIA and he’s got it in the center of the ring. DM fights it and tries to get towards the ropes, but she’s having no luck and finally can’t handle it anymore and taps out.
Your winner in 14:44, Ghosthead
Matt Folz vs. LD Williams vs. Tommy Wilder
All three men are in the ring after the lengthy entrances and referee Mel Creech has given the instructions. He calls for the bell.
Before the reverberations of the bell have faded, Williams is running straight at Folz, but Wilder pulls off a standing dropkick in a nanosecond that has Williams knocked into next week. He rolls out of the ring onto the floor and Folz and Wilder lock up.
Folz turns the lockup into a side headlock and he releases that and switches into an arm bar. Wilder flips over and reverses it, but Folz is the wily veteran and he gets Wilder back into the arm bar without difficulty.
Wilder gets his feet going, climbs up the corner and runs the top rope with Folz holding on the whole time. Wilder actually runs from one corner to another, finally leaping off and pulling Folz over with a one arm snap mare.
Wilder nails Folz with a shining wizard! Cover! Folz kicks out after 1½. Wilder is quickly back up and climbing the turnbuckle. He poses and that’s just the opening the recovering Williams needs. LD is up on the apron and shoves Wilder off the top rope and Wilder falls to the floor and clotheslines himself on the guardrail. Wilder clutches his throat and is writhing in pain.
LD climbs in the ring as Folz is pulling himself to his feet. The two men lock eyes and then it’s on.
Folz and Williams trade punches, then forearms, then European uppercuts. Neither man is getting an advantage.
The next five minutes are a fanboy’s wet dream. Folz strings a series of suplexes (T-bone and German mostly) together followed by Williams with a display of power moves, including spinebusters and a pretty wheelbarrow suplex. Williams finally gets a short-armed clothesline nailed perfectly and goes for the cover.
Williams gets a two and a half as Folz rolls the shoulder at the last possible moment. Williams starts jawing with Mel Creech about implications of Jeremy Maclin’s injury on his fantasy football team. While Williams is explaining his set of keepers to Creech, Folz has risen to his feet and explodes at Williams as LD turns around with a spear!
Both men are rolling around on the mat in pain, but Folz is the first to recover enough as he locks in a good STF on Williams. This might be it as Folz has it positioned perfectly in the middle of the ring.
The crowd stirs as help has arrived for LD Williams. Chloe is out and she slides into the ring behind both Creech and Folz. Chloe slams her arm up under Creech right in the twig and berries. Creech goes down and curls up like a Cheeto. While Creech is down, Chloe slams her branding iron across Folz’s noggin.
Folz is laid out and Williams is panting, trying to catch his breath. Folz rolls out of the ring to try to avoid the crazy Saint, but Chloe follows him right out nearly climbing over LD to get there.
Williams finally realizes what’s going on and he climbs to his feet and leans over the rope. He yells at Chloe, “What are you doing out here?” but Chloe is oblivious to everything but the blood flying off the forehead of Folz and the crunch of his ankle as she alternates her branding iron shots between head and leg.
LD has finally given up trying to get through to Chloe and turns around... right into the recovered Tommy Wilder! AIRWALK! What a beautiful maneuver. Wilder is up quickly and grabs Creech and shakes him into consciousness.
Wilder quickly then over to Williams. BUZZ KILL! Perfectly placed in the middle of the ring. Williams tries to hold on, but there’s no getting out of this one. Williams taps.
YOUR WINNER by submission in 11:10... TOMMY WILDER!
Wilder doesn’t waste any time celebrating as he sees Chloe reveling in the blood splatter. He runs the ropes and SUICIDE PLANCHA right onto Chloe! Chloe slams hard into the ringside barrier and Wilder is cushioned by Chloe’s body. He’s up quickly. White Hats and Saints are both pouring from the dressing rooms and each group carries away their respective members leaving Matt Folz laying alone in a growing pool of his own blood. OOWF Medical is out in their dear, sweet time and starts again the process of putting Folz back together.
Saints of Sinners (Christian Carter & Chloe) vs. The Darlings
No love lost between these four competitors. Extra referees are called to ringside for this one. L four are introduced and Alexis and Chloe start things off. The two of them meet in the middle of the ring with a stare down of pure hatred. Chloe bellows like a wounded animal and NAILS Alexis with a forearm to the side of the head. Alexis counters with a chop that echoes in the rafters. Then a forearm. Then a chop. Then a forearm. Chop. Forearm. Chop. Forearm. The crowd did the alternating YAY! BOO! thing each time. The two nearly hammer one another into oblivion before a burst of energy sends Alexis in to a rage and she backs Chloe into the corner with chops. Alexis climbs to the middle rope and rains punches down on Chloe’s head, hitting ten, then leaping back to the mat and charging in and catching her with a knee to the face. Chloe is stunned. Alexis grabs her by the head and charges out of the corner for a bulldog, but Carter comes into the ring and nearly takes her head off with a big boot to the face! Alexis hits the mat hard and grabs her jaw, Alexander races into the ring and catches Carter with a punch to the jaw, but the damage has already been done.
As the referee escorts Alex out of the ring, Chloe grabs her and sends her to the ropes and catches her on the rebound with a thunderous SPINEBUSTER! Chloe pulls Alexis to the apron, letting her head hang off the apron and drops an elbow down across her throat. Chloe slides into the ring and tags Carter, who runs down the apron and drops a leg across her throat driving her to the floor. Inside the ring, Alex has seen enough. He gets into the ring and charges at the ropes, ducking a Chloe clothesline attempt and dives between the ropes and slams into Carter, sending him crashing into the guardrail. Chloe comes out after Alex, grabbing him from behind. Carter regains his composure and tries a big boot to Alex, but Alex moves at the last second and he catches Chloe right on the jaw spinning her around. Alex grabs her and hits a GERMAN SUPLEX on the floor, then gets to his feet and charges at Carter and cuts him in half with a SPEAR! SPEAR! SPEAR!
Alex grabs Carter and rolls him into the ring and follows, mounting him and hammering him with punches to the face. The referee begins a five count, since Alex is not the legal man. Finally Alex breaks and heads to the corner, and the ref starts the ten count on Alexis. Alexis climbs onto the apron and is about to get into the ring when Chloe gets underneath her and POWERBOMBS her into the guardrail! Alex races around the ring and catches Chloe with a right cross sending her to the ground. The referee restarts his count and orders Alex back to his corner. While he is doing this, Carter slips out of the ring and grabs Lexie’s Intercontinental title and waits for her to struggle to her feet, then PASTES her in the face! Alexis hits the floor hard. Carter ditches the title and grabs a handful of hair and pulls Lexie to her feet, she has been busted wide open. Carter rolls her into the ring and casually follows and lays across her, one…..two…..thre…..NO! Alexis grabs Carter in a crucifix and rolls his shoulders to the mat, one, two, thre….NO! Carter kicks out at the last second. He quickly gets to his feet and catches Alexis with a kick to the head that keeps her on the mat.
Carter drags Alexis to the Saints corner and tags in Chloe, Chloe drops a knee across her throat and keeps it there until the referee threatens disqualification. She snarls at the ref and lets up, pulling Lexie to her feet and sending her to the ropes. On the rebound, Chloe hits a BRUTAL chlothesline that nearly takes Lexie out of her boots. Chloe covers, but Lexie rolls her shoulder at two. Chloe snarls again and pulls her up and throws her into the corner and charges in and catches her with a knee to the face. Alexis falls to the mat and Chloe repeatedly slams her knee into Alexis’ face until she is down on the mat. Chloe drags Alexis to the middle of the ring then heads to the corner and tries a MOONSAULT, but Alex races down the apron and clips Chloe’s foot, dropping her on the turnbuckle. Alexis manages to get to her feet and heads to the corner and grabs Chloe by the head and DRIVES her to the mat with a NECKBREAKER! Both women are down and the crowd is screaming for Alexis to make the tag to Alex. She crawls slowly, slowly, slowly……Chloe manages to rolls to her corner and tag in Carter, Carter charges across the ring and grabs Lexie by the foot, but she rolls over and repeatedly kicks him in the knee, then catches him with a shot that may not have been quite legal, doubling Carter over in pain. Lexie rolls free and makes the HOT TAG to Alex!
Alex charges into the ring and catches Carter with a spinning front kick to the face that sends him to the mat. He gets up and charges into the saints corner and knocks Chloe to the floor with a forearm, then slides out of the ring and grabs her by the hair and throws her face first into the ring post. As she staggers backward, Alex flips her the bird, Chloe snarls and charges, but Alex takes her down with a drop toe hold that sends her ad first into the ring steps. Chloe remains motionless on the floor. Alex slides back into the ring just as Carter stands up and POPS him with a SUPERKICK! Carter doesn’t go down, but his lights have been dimmed. Alex calls Alexis into the ring and the siblings lift Carter in a suplex, then drop him stomach first on the top rope! Alex grabs Carter by the head and pulls him off the ropes (like the set up for a Randy Orton DDT) while Alexis climbs to the top rope. She leaps and hits a WARRIOR STOMP on Carter’s back as Alex PLANTS him with a DDT!
Alex doesn’t even try for a cover, rolling him over instead and hammering him with punches to the face. Soon enough, Carter is bleeding badly. He reaches up and gouges Alex’s eyes sending him staggering. Carter slowly gets to his feet and tries to charge at Darling, but he connects with a low drop kick to the knee that sends Carter right back to the mat. Alex pounces and grabs Carter’s leg and traps him in the FIGURE FOUR! Carter howls in pain but refuses to tap out. Alex reaches out and tags Alexis, but doesn’t release the hold. Lexie charges into the ring and catches Carter with a STIFF kick to the head, that can’t do any wonders for his possible concussion. Carter is flat on the mat, Alexis covers, but Carter kicks out at two.
Alex gets to his feet and wanders a little too close to the ropes. On the outside, Chloe has recovered and she grabs Alex’s legs and pulls him out of the ring and nails Alex with a punch. Alex staggers and we see why, Chloe has a chain wrapped around her fist. With blood pouring down her head, she goes after Alex, chasing him around the ring hammering him with punches to the face, opening several gashes on his head. Chloe finally ditches the chain and connects with a low blow, then lifts Alex for the CORKSCREW on the floor! Inside the ring, Alexis is trying to set Carter up for the BITCH KILLER, but she sees Alex in trouble and abandons the move and slides out of the ring and catches Chloe with a kick to the ribs that sends both her and Alex over the guardrail into the first row of fans.
Alexis slides back into the ring, but Carter is waiting for her and catches her with a spinning back fist to the side of the head. Alexis staggers and Carter grabs her and hits a BUCKLE BOMB! As Alexis staggers forward, Carter kicks her in the gut and lifts her for the FINAL TESTIMONY but Alexis shits in mid move and rolls Carter into a SMALL PACKAGE for a two count! Carter gets to his feet quickly and he and Alexis go toe to toe trading chops and kicks with neither going down, but both of them on rubber legs. Carter swings wildly and Alexis ducks it, races to the corner and springs off the middle turnbuckle and catches Carter with the LETHAL INJECTION! Before Alexis can get to her feet though, Chloe is back into the ring and she grabs Alexis by the legs and starts a GIANT SWING! They go round and round and round and finally Carter gets up, and as Alexis comes around, Carter catches her with a NASTY kick to the head! Alexis might be out cold!
From the outside, Alex grabs Carter and pulls him out of the ring, Alex’s face is a crimson mask. He hammers Carter with punches to the face, then sits him in a chair, climbs onto the apron and races down the apron and leaps and catches Carter with a SICK KICK! Inside the ring, Chloe has managed to get back to her feet, she pulls a barely conscious Lexie to her feet and lifts her and hits the WIDOWS PEAK! Chloe has no intention of covering Alexis though, she leaves the ring and reaches under the apron and pulls out HAPPY DETH BAT! Chloe slowly climbs back onto the apron, but Alex stops her before she can get into the ring. The two of them fight it out on the apron trading punches and kicks and gouging eyes and biting, pretty much everything. Finally, with both of them holding onto the top rope, throwing punches Chloe grabs Alex and lifts him up, but Alex lands one more punch (which, we now see HIM wearing a chain around his fist) and they both fall off the apron and crash through the Slovakian Announce table! OH MY GOD!
Carter slowly slides into the ring, he is pouring blood and glassy eyed. He grabs Lexie by the hair and shoves her into the corner, lifts her up and sets her on the top rope and climbs up for a SUPERPLEX, but that isn’t quite enough. He pulls her up until they are both on the top rope. Lexie fights the move and they both teeter precariously on the top rope, Lexie manages to hit Carter with a HARD forearm that sends him flying into the middle of the ring, where he lands HARD on the back of his head. Lexie cannot keep her balance though and she tumbles off the top rope, SLAMS hard onto the apron, then falls to the floor! All four are down, the referees check on all four, then decide enough is enough, he waves to the back for medical help and declares the match a no-contest.
WINNER – No Contest in 33:33
Onslaught Title Match
Amazing Jos © vs. Jeremy Punswick
Budgie's I TURNED TO STONE plays and out comes Jeremy Punswick accompanied by Chloe. She has what looks to be a book with her and is jabbering about what's in the book. They seem to be in an animated discussion and ignoring most of the crowd's dislike of the Saints. Chloe has the book at ringside as Punswick gets into the ring...
And North West's daddy's AMAZING brings the Amazing Jos into the ring. Jos sees his long time enemy and Chloe and is animatedly calling them out. Chloe just holds up the book, that we see now has “Rule Book” plainly written on the outside, and indicates to the referee that she is just there to help. The referee warns her to stay out of the match and orders the referee to ring the bell.
The two big men lock up in the middle of the ring and Jos backs Puns into the ropes and pats him on the face while making a clean break. That riles up Punswick but Chloe just looks at him to settle down. They lock up again and Puns once again gets pushed back and Jos again pats him on the face as he breaks clean. Puns is steaming and the referee says something to Jos but Jos just winks at the ref. Another lockup in the middle of the ring and once again Jos pushes Puns back and starts to pat Punswick put Puns grabs his mask and turns him into the corner and punches him with several hard rights and then goes to throw Jos across the ring but Jos reverses and Puns runs into an Oh Em Gee and goes flying out of the ring. Meanwhile the referee signals the penalty.
Jeremy Punswick has used his first warning
Punswick is livid at ringside as Chloe points to the book and holds up three fingers. Chloe tries to settle Punswick down and she is not very successful as the referee's count reaches 12. Finally at about 16 Punswick tries to get back into the ring but then points at Jos claiming he was trying to interfere which causes the referee to push back Jos and break the count. Punswick enters the ring a bit calmer. He locks up with Jos and forces Jos into the corner, throws him across the ring and goes to follow up with a kick but Jos dodges at the last second and Punswick goes flying, Jos hits a hard kick and then gets out of the way as Puns is tangled in the turnbuckle. Chloe complains to the referee which is totally ignored.
Punswick charges and starts hitting hard forearm shots and elbow strikes and whips Jos across the ring and lets loose with a hard clothesline. Punswick drops a knee on Jos shoulder and begins dropping knees across the arm of Jos before locking in a Fujiwari Armbar! Jos tries to regain a vertical base but Puns has it cinched in solid. Jos kicks and wiggles his way to the ropes.
Amazing Jos has used his first rope break
The referee calls for the break but Puns begins dropping knees across the arm and torques Jos arm around the bottom ring rope before stomping on the arm just before the count of five.
Jeremy Punswick has used his second warning
Chloe is incensed and jumps up on the apron claiming the referee is double penalizing Punswick. As the argument progresses Punswick low blows Jos and hits a huge Suplex. Puns covers and Chloe points back to the ring. The delay means Puns only gets a two count, but it was the opening he was waiting for. Puns opens up with full force, being careful to keep it within the rules. He targets the arms of Jos, and once again goes for a Fujiwari Armbar. But Jos is again too close to the ropes and he forces the break.
Amazing Jos has used his second rope break
Punswick instinctively goes to follow up but Chloe yells and holds up three fingers and Puns backs away. Jos gets back to his feet and Punswick backs Jos into the ropes and throws him across the ring. Spinebuster! Punswick covers but only gets a two count. Punswick picks up Jos, Belly to Belly Suplex. Punswick covers for yet another two count as the ringside announcer calls the ten minute mark. Chloe pounds the mat and yells “Finish Him!” Punswick picks up Jos going for the Extinction Level Event, but Jos rolls him up in a small package for a two count. Punswick is enraged but Jos gets his flying feet in gear and starts throwing elbows and feet and knocks him over with an Oh Em Gee! Jos covers Puns but Puns gets his foot over the ropes.
Jeremy Punswick has used his first rope break
Punswick stands up and runs right into a face slap from Jos. Jos begins peppering Puns with chops and elbows. Jos picks up Punswick for Shut the Hell Up but Punswick grabs the ropes.
Jeremy Punswick has used his second rope break
Chloe pounds the mat again and yells at Punswick, who steps into another slap in the face from Jos. Jos just stands there as Punswick fumes. Jos calls Punswick a pussy and slaps him again, and Punswick hits the ropes and flies into Jos with fists a flying. Chloe screams and the referee turns to the announcer.
Jeremy Punswick has used his final warning
Punswick is furious and shoves the referee, picks up Jos and slams him to the mat and resumes punching away. The referee has no alternative but to call for the bell.
Winner by disqualification in 13:33 and STILL Onslaught Champion – Amazing Jos
Chloe rolls into the ring and puts the book in the ring near the corner as she joins Punswick in kicking the crap out of the Onslaught Champion. Chloe has Punswick pick up Jos, she grabs the book, and SLAMS it into the head of Jos. She opens the book and pulls two sets of barbed wire brass knuckles out of it, hands one to Punswick, then they start punching away on Jos. Chloe pitches the book back near the corner, Punswick picks up Jos, Chloe climbs the turnbuckle. SPIKE EXTINCTION LEVEL EVENT on Jos! Salvation and Mai Muyo run down to try to intevene, but Punswick and Chloe bail out of the ring and head through the crowd to the back, laughing and high fiving all the way.
OOWF World Tag Team Title Match
Texpress © vs. Salvation
Texpress is out first—and man, does the Oklahoma crowd hate Texpress. They are not big fans of that Texpress, no siree. Nothing tangles the ol’ Oklahoma catchin’ tails more than ol’ Texpress makin’ they way down the ring, saying all sorta nice things about Texas. The Oklahoma fans do not like that, I tell you, they do not like that thing at all, and they are expressin’ their displeasure with all kinds of doings, like booing, or saying they don’t like Texas none. Because no siree, they do not like Texas none, nor Texpress, on account of their likin’ Texas.
No siree. They do not like Texas none. And when Chad Madison cups his ol’ hand to the ol’ ear, no siree, the fans do not like that. They understand that ol’ Madison is tryin’ to get the jump on them, pull over the ol’ polecat, tryin’ to play along to the aforementioned expressions of not likin’ Texpress, which the crowd happens to be makin’, which again is coming in the form of hootin’ and hollerin’, but not the kind they would use for sports teams and the like which they like, because they do not like Texpress, no sir, on account of their affiliatin’ with Texas, which the Oklahoma fans do not like, on account of livin’ in Oklahoma, which is a separate state from Texas altogether, just like Quebec is a separate province from Newfoundland, and we all know that much of Quebec wants to secede—which is THEIR GOD-GIVEN RIGHT—but you can imagine that Quebec ain’t a real big fan of the rest of Canada, on account of them wantin’ to leave it, so you better believe that the Quebec don’t give one hootentoot about Newfoundland, since they barely give such a hootentoot about Canada, and Quebec is in Canada, so they must like some part of Canada, that is to say they probably consider themselves friendly with Quebec, on account of bein’ Quebec, but ain’t none of Newfoundland in Quebec, and ain’t none of Quebec in Newfoundland, so you can bet yer tighty-wighties Quebec don’t like Newfoundland none, which is to say that these separate provinces don’t like each other none—or maybe Newfoundland is neutral, and dammit Newfoundland take a damn side—but that is to say that states don’t like each other none, especially if they ain’t the same state, but sometimes even then what with a West Virginia and the long, complicated history of the War of Northern Aggression, but this is all to say that on account of Oklahoma bein’ a separate state, and not likin’ Texas all that much, which is to say they ain’t bosom-buddies, when Chad Madison cups his hand to his ear, the fans don’t like it much, no sir.
At this point, Salvation makes their appearance, and the fans go a’hootin and hollerin’—in a good way this time for NASCAR Stan and his wacky people-eatin’ Jap sidekick. Someone throws Ecosystem a human finger, and Eco doesn’t really know how to react…so he signs it and throws it back in the audience. That’s worth good money! Anyway, Eco and Stan are nowhere in as jovial a mood as the fans, as they’ve had their pre-talk, and Eco goes right in the ring, nose-to-nose with Chad.
The two lock up to start, zero pleasantries from Eco, and Eco somehow forces Chad down to one knee…Chad with the armbar takeover, Eco spins on the ground for leverage, pushes up, gets a snapmare into a chinlock on Chad. Chad pops Eco in the nose, but Eco doesn’t let go…Chad fights up, elbows into Eco’s gut, whips Eco into the ropes, Eco comes up with the Lou Thesz Press, Chad ducks, both off opposite ropes, Chad leaps with the crossbody, Eco catches Chad! Eco throws Chad with the Last Call, but Chad spins midair and lands on his feet. Eco spins around and charges, Chad superkicks, Eco matrixes under and rolls away! Both circle each other, charge into another lockup, Chad drops back to monkey flip Eco—and now it’s Eco’s turn to land on his feet, Chad turns around, right into Eco’s Superkick! (Long-time fans remember it as stolen from Ravenna Blue.) Eco goes for the pin, Zane breaks that right up, though Chad wasn’t likely to stay down anyway.
Eco stays in Zane’s face a bit too long, Chad gets a rollup, 1-2-Eco kicks out fast, like a scared raccoon flailing. Now Chad is coming in with those educated feet, kicking Eco hard in the chest. Eco begins to exchange the shots, but Chad gets the better and winds up another set of knees, chest kicks (Eco’s chest is RED) and finally nailing him with a Vintage Chad Dropkick!
Eco goes down…and comes up with a ROARING kip-up…but which we mean, Eco literally roars at Chad Madison! Chad seems thrown for a second, as Eco leaps on him and begins pounding away on Chad’s face, suddenly stopping to claw! The referee stops Eco immediately, and Eco steps back and blinks. At this moment, Chad makes a dive to Zane and tags him in, and Zane blasts Eco down with a running shoulder block! Eco does a Ziggler flip into his corner! Sitting up, he is still blinking and Stan calls for the tag; Eco obliges.
It’s the big men now, and they choose to charge right at each other…Zane and Stan both swinging the big arms, Stan getting the better of the double clothesline attempt and knocking Zane down—but right after, Zane drop-toeholds the stumbling Stan down, grabbing the past-injured knee, but Stan kicks him right off, and the two bulls rise together, Zane smiling and Stan focused…after a few minutes of brawling, they back up for the bull position once more. Zane comes in with a lot of power, but Stan gets the best of the exchange, forcing Zane into the corner hard—Zane spins it around though, and starts knocking Stan’s head into the top turnbuckle! 1-2-3—but Stan suddenly headbutts the hard-headed Zane, and knocks his head into the turnbuckle and throws him back. Stan quickly ascends the turnbuckles…but it might be too soon, as Zane recovers quickly and throws Stan off the second rope to the mat, SHAKING the ring! Myers walks over to the large Stan Fulton and hooks him up for a Powerslam: BOOM!
Fulton is flat and Zane goes for the cover, but Stan was playing possum, grabbing the neck of Zane and pushing against his shin—it looks like Stan is borrowing Mai’s Trinitarian Choke, only it’s got about 200 more pounds from Stan the Man! Zane is struggling to find a way out…until he wedges his arms between and pulls Stan over into a half-Boston Crab!
Stan Fulton’s body was not made for pulling by the arms, especially with bad knees being twisted, and while he gamely pulls himself toward the ropes, it’s Eco’s turn to make a save, as only he can…
Eco: “Look! A Distraction!”
Referee: “Where?”
As the referee looks around, Eco leaps off the top rope and MISSILE DROPKICKS Zane Myers to break up the hold! Now Chad’s partner has been kicked and his move has been stolen, and the Cowboy does not cotton to that one bit! Cottoning is not a thing the Cowboy tends to do, and certainly not cottoning to thing, except perhaps of the lady variety, but not always even then, but he certainly doesn’t cotton to stealing, and he cottons even less to the stealing of his moves than he does to stealing, which is already none, so if you cotton less than none, you know what you get, don't ya, boy? Negative cotton. And that means that if you getting' negative cotton, you got negative cotton pickers, and if cotton-pickers are negative they sho' ain't positive, because negative and positive go together like oil and vinegar, which is to say, they go together like they ain't goin' together, which is to say not at all, so the aforementioned cottons pickers are not happy, no sire, and we's ain't talking' about pre-civil war times, so negative cotton pickers means unionizin' So, you know, hoo BOY is Chad man.
Chad runs in and tackles Eco down, and the two roll out of the ring, brawling. Meanwhile, Stan recovers before Zane, and nails the big man with an even bigger SPEAR! Zane flops down on his back in front of the turnbuckles as Stan prepares to ascend again…
…and here come the Saints of Sinners! Stank is in the ring first, slamming Stan to the ground off the turnbuckles! LD Williams grabs Chad off Eco on the outside and tosses him into the steel stairs, putting the boots to Eco next as the referee calls for the bell!
Winner in 21:21…No Contest!
The rest of the Sinners come down into the ring, beginning to put the boots to the big man Stan in the ring….outside the ring, Eco bites SHARPLY into the neck of LD Williams, who elbows him in the nose and tosses him into the lion’s den of the ring. Eco tries to bob and weave, even catching Jeremy Punswick with a shot of green mist on half the face, but a straight right from Stank takes him down as Salvation eats the beating…
…until the White Hats come down, Mai running out in front alongside Wilder and D&D, and the usual brawl unfolds—but this time, security is ready to break it up quickly, the fans booing—half for spoiling a good match, half for wanting to see the brawl continue
OOWF World Heavyweight Title
Moosehead Jack © vs. DK Murphy
Miscommunication on writing here. The match is a vicious brawl in the vein of Moose and Outback Jack for a new generation. Moose seems a bit shocked at how well DK is handling himself. Both men wind up bloody. But the lack of experience in this type of match finally takes its toll on DK and Moose is able to get him up for the GO TO SLEEP FOREVER before locking in the JI-ENDO and getting a win. Moose looks to continue the beating post-match but Danny Taylor is out to get in the way and that infuriates MHJ. He’s about to attack Danny but Daniella, Firewoman, Mai and Wilder are out as are the Saints and both sides decide on discretion for a change. The security guards with tasers are probably a factor. But the fleeting image is a Moose frothing at the mouth to get at Taylor.
Your winner in 21:04 and STILL World Heavyweight Champion, Moosehead Jack
Thanks for coming out and watching LIVE OOWF action! Be sure to check out the JUDGEMENT EVE 9, coming to you Live! Sunday August 25th from Tokyo, Japan! And don’t forget to catch next week’s OOWF Mid-Week Mayhem! Wednesday, August 7th ! From Sapporo, Japan. Did you see something you really liked? Post it here in the 2013 Awards Reminder Thread. Please join us for OOWF Chat on Wednesday nights! And be sure to check out the full OOWF Archive and read up on the 8-year plus history of the OOWF!