OOWF MidWeek Mayhem 11-21-07

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mooseheadjack
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mooseheadjack
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OOWF MidWeek Mayhem 11-21-07 Jul 26, 2008 22:44:33 GMT -5

Post by mooseheadjack on Jul 26, 2008 22:44:33 GMT -5

OOWF MidWeek Mayhem: Shuffling the Deck
Live! From Clackamas, Oregon

SEAMUS MCNASTY & BLITZ vs. BARON VON OREGON & APOCALYPTIC EXISTENCE

Blitz made his OOWF debut last week, and this week he is teaming with another OOWF newcomer, Seamus McNasty. Their opponents Baron Von Oregon and Apocalyptic Existence are already waiting in the ring as they make their way down to the ring. McNasty climbs between the ropes and BVO and AE immediately charge him and try to take him to the mat with a double clothesline. McNasty ducks and stops and turns and scoops AE off his feet and drives him to the mat. From the outside, Blitz springs to the top rope and leaps into the ring, catching BVO with a springboard drop kick to the mouth. McNasty pulls AE to his feet and drops him in his tracks with a clothesline, then Blitz whips AE to McNasty, and Seamus catches him with a black hole slam. AE powders out and Seamus pulls BVO to his feet and whips him hard into the corner and tags in Blitz, as BVO staggers forward, Blitz hits the ropes and clips the Baron’s knee, then gets to his feet and hits a standing back flip for a two count. Blitz kips to his feet and waits for BVO to get to one knee, then he hits the ropes and connects with a shining wizard, then tags in McNasty. Seamus waits for BVO to get to his feet, then catches him with a series of forearms to the side of the head, then lifts him in a side suplex and plants him on the mat, climbs to the second rope and leaps, driving his elbow into BVO’s sternum. McNasty hauls BVO to his feet again and sets him on his shoulders and tags in Blitz. Blitz climbs to the top rope and leaps and snaps a perfect hurracarana on BVO from Seamus shoulders. BVO is toast. Blitz covers and gets the academic three count while Seamus knocks AE off the apron to keep him from interfering.
WINNERS in 4:05 – Seamus McNasty & Blitz

FIREWOMAN vs. SYB

SYB is in the ring with his law team of Dewey Cheatum & Howe talking animatedly and pointing to the back. Firewoman comes out next and gets a nice response from the crowd. She makes her way to the ring, eyes focused on SYB the whole time. She steps between the ropes and immediately SYB starts talking:

JUST WAIT RIGHT THERE! I saw what you did to Puck Dupp last week! Well let me tell you something missy (Fire bristles a bit at this) I AM NOT PUCK DUPP! (the crowd laughs at this) SHUT UP! YOU KNOW WHAT I MEANT! Listen, I am ALL MAN and I WILL NOT be held responsible for what I do to you tonight, my lawyers have drawn up a contract exonerating me from all…OOOOOOOF

Firewoman catches SYB with a spin kick to the mouth that sends him to the mat, then grabs Dewey and plants him with a belly to belly suplex, kicks Howe and sets him up for a rude awakening, then catches a charging Cheatum with a shot to the guy and hits the Rude Awakening and DDT at the same time. The lawyers roll under the ropes and fall to the floor and SYB attacks Fire from behind and knocks her to the mat. He pulls her up and sets her up for a pump handle slam, and gives a couple of suggestive hip thrusts, then hauls Firewoman up on his shoulders, but before he can slam her to the mat, she escapes and slips over his shoulder. Fire spins SYB around and grabs his head and looks deep in his eyes. SYB grins and puckers up, so Fire slams him repeatedly in the face with a series of head buts. SYB staggers and falls on the second rope, blood pouring from what is obviously a broken nose. Fire slingshots herself over the top rope and drops a knee on the back of SYB’s head that sends him back into the ring. Fire steps back into the ring and puts up her hands for a fight. SYB staggers, then obliges and they slowly circle. SYB throws a couple of punches that Fire easily avoids, then Fire peppers him with punches to the face. SYB swings wildly once again and Fire slips behind him and grabs his head and hammers him with several bionic elbows to the back of the head. She lets go and grabs SYB’s waist, he falls forward and she gives him a few suggestive thrusts, then grabs him and hauls him up into a backbreaker, then spins him down and drops him with a diamond cutter. Fire woman pounces on SYB and locks him in the Regal Stretch, SYB tries to fight, but gives up and taps out fairly quickly.
WINNER in 3:59 – Firewoman

Firewoman starts to leave the ring, then stops and comes back to the beaten and bloody SYB with a mic and sits straddling his chest. Firewoman gets real close to SYB and looks like she is about to kiss him, then licks his cheek “Happy Birthday Bitch.” SYB reaches up and grabs for her head, but she HAMMERS him with a forearm to the face, then rolls him over and holds him in the Cattle Mutilation until he passes out.

LUCIOS & CHRIS ALT vs. ECOSYSTEM & DONOVAN VIPER

Lucios comes out first, to raucous cheers. Apparently, Oregon is Run DLP Country. Chris Alt is next, and barely gets in the ring when “Them Bones” hits and Donovan Viper enters. Viper is staring down Alt when Ecosystem comes out to massive boos, possibly because of his “Greg Oden SUCKS” shirt. Ecosystem: Big Nets fan. Alt and Viper start us off with a lockup. Headlock by Alt on Viper, Viper tries to flip Alt over, but Chris lands on his feet. Chris lands a punch on Viper, and Viper stumbles backwards. Irish whip, and Alt catches him with a clothesline off of the ropes. Quick cover and a two-count. Seeing his partner in trouble, Eco grabs a microphone.

Eco: Hey Lucios! AQUAFINA IS TAP WATER!!!

The honor of Aquafina being challenged, Lucios runs in the ring and is restrained by the referee. With the ref distracted, Eco runs in the ring and hits Chris Alt with the microphone. It doesn’t actually hurt, but it makes a loud noise, so Alt dutifully falls over. Viper covers, and also gets a two-count. Viper puts Alt in a full nelson while trapping the lower body under his legs, and Chris can’t seem to find a way out. Lucios decides to grab a microphone himself.

Lucios: Hey Eco! EVANESCENCE IS A SUBPAR BAND!

Eco runs into the ring in furious anger, and the referee has to physically grab him around the waist to restrain him. Meanwhile, Lucios throws Aquafina in Viper’s eyes, who falls backward because of all the nasty stuff in that tap water. Alt pulls out of the full nelson, and begins stomping on the prone Viper. Alt reaches down to pull Donovan into a Dragon Sleeper, but Donovan gets to the ropes. Alt nails him with a lariat to the chest before releasing the hold. Donovan is struggling to get up, while Alt walks to the corner, crouching down for a spear. He makes a run at Viper, but Donovan sidesteps and Alt goes careening into the turnbuckle post. Viper gets to the corner and tags in Ecosystem. Ecosystem goes for a schoolboy pin on Alt, but only gets a two-count. As Chris is getting up, Eco produces a balloon from his tights and begins inflating it. Eco then twists the balloon into a hat and puts it on his own head. Chris Alt takes a swing at Eco, but Eco merely ducks and Alt’s hand bounces off the giant balloon. The referee removes the inflatable helmet in annoyance, and Eco uses the opportunity to initiate the Highly Technical Kick In The Balls. Pin attempt, two count. Eco then wraps Alt in a Dragon Sleeper in preparation for the Endgame, but Alt uses all his strength to flip Eco over into a Dragon Sleeper of his own. Eco flips backward into the original sleeper with a rope assist. Alt attempts to reach the ropes, but cannot. The referee lifts Alt’s hand, and it drops once, but on the second time, Alt flips Eco over into a power slam! Clutching his scrotum, Alt tags in Lucios, who is a HOUSE O’FIRE! Clothesline to the staggering Eco! Clothesline to the interfering Viper! Clothesline to the referee! Clothesline to the ENTIRE FRONT ROW! That’s the price you pay for sitting in the front row after not reading the waiver you signed. Lucios goes to the top, and gestures as though he Is about to do some move we should recognize, but no one does because he is new. He comes off the ropes with a double axe handle, but Eco catches him with the AQUAFINA TO THE FACE! Lucios is BLINDED! Eco pulls the head back, Endgame, and that is actually End Game.
WINNERS in 5:03 – Ecosystem and Donovan Viper!

RABBXT, CAPELLAN, FIRECHILD & PHANTOS vs. CANADIAN DRAGON, F. FONZWORTH MACCAPPINGTONIII, RYAN HARDCORE & VOLTAGE

All 8 men make their entrances, and referee Angelo Barros is about to call for the bell, when, General Manager the Rick appears at the top of the ramp. “Ladies and Gentlemen. In my effort to offer you a quality Wrestling program tonight, I have decided to ban anyone but these 8 men from ringside for this match. Mr. Barros, We WILL have a winner in this match! Barros calls for the bell. Rabbxt and Ryan Hardcore draw the starting assignments. They lock up and Hardcore flings Rabbxt into a neutral corner and delivers several hard back elbows. RH backs up and charges, but Rabbxt leapfrogs RH, causing him to go shoulder-first into the ring post. Rabbxt dropkicks RH immediately, pushing him back into the post. Rabbxt spits his chewing gum out and swats it at hardcore, who is now slumped in the corner. That draws in Voltage, who grabs Rabbxt and throws him out of the ring and into the announce table! CD charges into the ring, and is met by the oncoming Capellan with a clothesline. Phantos climbs the turnbuckle and hits a missile dropkick on FFMcIII, who had just entered the ring as well. Firechild is in now, and goes to work on MacCap. Referee Angelo Barros looks around and sees all eight men in full-scale brawl mode. He climbs the ropes and sits on a turnbuckle, watching the action unfold. On the outside, Rabbxt trades punches with Voltage. Capellan clears the announce table, and slams CD on it. Firechild comes running over, and hits Cap with a vicious spear. CD is up and grabs Voltage, pulling him onto the table for a…OMG…CANDIAN DESTROYER THROUGH THE ANNOUNCE TABLE! Both men lay among the wreckage. Hardcore throws Capellan into the ring steps head first! Firechild and Hardcore both grab chairs, and take turns pasting each other with them. Dragon emerges from the table carnage and grabs Capellan, calls for the spirit of Arn Anderson to fill him, and then hits a Gordbuster on the ring steps. In the ring, FFMcIII is pounding Phantos with a series of body slams and clubbing forearms. Rabbxt climbs a turnbuckle and hits a corkscrew moonsault on MacCap, earning a ‘That was awesome’ chant from the crowd. Voltage climbs in and Rabbxt & Phantos hit a double dropkick sending him flying to the outside! FFIII staggers to his feet, Phantos bounces of the far rope and hits the Scotsman with a Flying burrito! Rabbxt follows up by executing a standing frankensteiner, and MacCap tumbles to the outside as well. Rabbxt returns to the turnbuckle, and Phantos climbs the next one, and the two high-flyers exchange quick head nods, and hit simultaneous senton splashes to the crowd of wrestlers on the outside. All eight men are on the ground. The crowd has began a crazy ‘this is awesome’ chant.
Ryan Hardcore and Phantos climb slowly into the ring. RH grabs the masked man and hoists him into a gorilla press slam, and turns it into a Michinoku Driver! Barros hops down, and begins to count 1, 2..NO! Firechild breaks the pin, and sets RH up for the DevilDriver and it CONNECTS! Cover and 1..2..NO! Voltage interrupts, grabbing FC and hitting a sick Circuit Breaker! HE makes the cover and gets a 2 count when Capellan rushes in, grabs Volt and hits a Vindicator! Cover and 1..2..NO! Canadian Dragon breaks that pin fall up, and delivers another CANDIAN DESTROYER! He covers Capellan. 1..2..NO! Rabbxt comes crashing down from atop a ringside ladder (“Where did that ladder come from?” screams Russ) with a twisting, spinning, flippy, moonsault the likes of which only exist in video games! Rabbxt makes the seemingly academic cover for 1..2..NO! And Still no pin! FFIII makes the break up, and hoists Rabbxt up into the Greeting from Scotland! But Rabbxt small packages the much larger man and Barros Counts 1…2…and 3!
WINNERS in 23:33 – Rabbxt, Capellan, Firechild and Phantos

MOOSEHEAD JACK vs. CONCRETE TG

Moosehead Jack and Concrete TG both make their standard entrances. Both men are calm - that can’t be a good sign. Referee Mel Creech gives them their instructions and calls for the bell. They lock up and Concrete grabs a hammerlock. Jack reverses, and Concrete re-reverses. Concrete switches his grip and attempts a belly-to-back suplex, but Jack blocks. Jack grabs Concrete’s arm, flips him over, and locks on an arm bar. Concrete rolls through to his feet and transitions back to a hammerlock. Jack drives an elbow back, but Concrete dodges. Jack reaches down and grabs Concrete’s leg, flipping him onto his back and bridging into a pin. Concrete kicks out at two as some fans start a “This is Awesome” chant. Both men get to their feet and circle. Concrete moves in for a lock up, but Jack stops him short with a right cross to the face. Concrete staggers, and Jack snap mares him and locks on a chin lock. The “Awesome” chant dies out. Jack casually slips the hold down into a choke, drawing a count. Jack breaks at four, hits Concrete with a series of cross faces, and goes back to the choke for another four. Jack releases the choke, slams Concrete’s head back into the mat, and drives a knee into his throat. He covers, but Concrete kicks out just before three. Jack pulls him up and goes for a suplex, but Concrete blocks. Jack blocks a reversal, so Concrete drives a knee hard into his stomach and snaps him over with a second attempt. Concrete rolls through and drives fists into Jack’s face until Mel orders him off. Concrete backs away and Jack sits up with a smile on his face. Concrete suddenly sprints forward and hits a running knee to the face. He pulls Jack up and goes for a power bomb , but Jack reverses into a backdrop. Concrete hangs on, and reverses that into a sunset flip. Jack kicks out at two. Jack is up a split second faster, and nails Concrete with a lariat. He plants him with a body slam and stomps on his face. He pulls concrete up and spikes him with a DDT, them goes for the Jiendo. Concrete struggles and manages to slip free, rolling to his feet. Jack goes for another clothesline, but Concrete ducks. Jack hits the ropes and Concrete greets him with a super kick. Concrete comes off the second rope with a leg drop and covers, but gets only two. Concrete pulls Jack to his feet and rocks him with a series of European uppercuts. Jack reverses an Irish whip and shoots him to the ropes, catching him with a knee to the midsection. Concrete lands hard on his back, and Jack immediately pulls him off the mat and sets up the Heart Punch. As he twists the arm, Concrete twists through it and ends up behind Jack, grabbing him under the chin and driving the back of his head down to the mat. Concrete grabs his legs and transitions into the Backwall. He covers and hooks the leg for the three.
WINNER in 16:45, Concrete TG.

DAVIN MORELAND vs. HARDBODY HARRIS – OOWF Onslaught Championship I Quit Match

Feeling out process to start, a few pushes back and forth,then Davin just flat out SLAPS Harris! HH shakes his head clear then tackles Moreland and lays in the punches. Glaw starts to count to get Harris off Moreland but remembers this is a no DQ match. He backs up as HH pulls Moreland to his feet and slings him to the corner. HH splahses Moreland and asks for the mic to be brought in. Moreland looks at the mic, laughs at Harris and shoves him backward. They reset in the middle of the ring and start back with a lockup. This time Moreland gets the advantage and slings HH back across the ring, hoists him in a gorilla press! Corwd applauds but Harris doesn't look too happy -especially when he's unceremoniously tossed out of the ring and into the third row of seats! Crowd quickly gathers Harris and leads him back to the guardrail where Moreland is waiting for him. Harris is suplexed over the barricade, nearly missing the steps. Glaw is following and fretting about having to referee this match (he misses the traditional Onslaught rules). Moreland goes for a chair to swat Harris, but HH sees it coming. He hops back on the ring steps, and Moreland swings for Harris' knees. HH jumps clear of the swing and hops down, then pulls the top half of the steps off to defend himself as Moreland swings a few more times, the metal ringing loud and clear over the crowd noise. Moreland tries to back HH up some more, and HH trips, falling backward wih the "V" of the stairs over his head. Moreland kicks the stairs, hoping the noise would stun Harris and perhaps he'd submit. When Harris refuses, he stands on one step to keep them in place and pulls up one arm to do a variant of the MARK HENRY MEMORIAL ARMBAR! Harris refuses to quit, so Moreland drops the hold to go get the chair again. It takes him a moment to come back around - enough time for HH to get up and turn the stairs around! He uses the "V" to pin Moreland to the apron, and the two trade punches. Moreland can't move with the steps braced by Harris! Glaw has the mic between them, but all Moreland is doing is cuss while Harris is shouting back "THERE'S CHILDREN IN HERE!" . Moreland finally gets in a good enough shot to back Harris away and can finally free himself. Harris has a chair now, but Moreland paws it out of Harris's hands and swings for the fences! Harris sprawls a short distance up the ramp where Moreland catches up and pins Harris to the floor with the chair! he then puts a foot on the back of Harris' neck and pushes with all his might! Harris screams but refuses to surrender. Moreland stands and folds up the chair, Harris crawling back up the ramp in a vain attempt to escape. Moreland closes and realizes that Harris was merely playing possum! He nails Moreland with a low blow and once he's on the ground, Harris rolls Moreland on his face and locks on a camel clutch. Moreland manages to squeak out a "no" before getting his arms free, pushing to all fours and bucking Harris off his back - and CLEAN OFF THE RAMP TO THE FLOOR! Harris is bleeding from the chairshot and one arm looks to be injured from the assault. Harris falls over, leaving himself wide open to a flying elbow from Moreland! HARRIS ROLLS CLEAR! Moreland nearly cracks his elbow on the bare concrete. Harris uses the moment to stomp Moreland mercilessly, but doesn't have the arm strength for a proper hold. He snags a piece of piping left over from the scaffolding and swings it mightily at Moreland, making him scream for once! Glaw is there, but Moreland refuses to quit as well! Moreland manages to get to his feet and he looks furious! he catches the pipe and snarls something about Clangy before yanking it out of Harris' hand. Harris dodges and dances around Moreland's wild swings as they push back to the locker rooms, but most of the staff and wrestlers give them a wide berth (including Moosehead Jack, who isn't interested in clobbering anyone not named Concrete). Harris shoves a roadcase at Moreland, and knocks him off balance. Harris then opens the roadcase and gathers Moreland to suplex him inside, the lock it up and sit on it til Moreland quits. Moreland lands roughly inside but Harris can't close the case fast enough. Moreland yanks Harris inside and the lid closes itself! The case then rolls adn shifts jerkily along as the two browl in the closed confines. After a minute of this the lid springs open and Moreland climbs out, and Harris looks like he was in there with a couple of wild animals - he and Moreland are covered with blood, but who is bleeding so profusely? Moreland throws Harris through a door - the door to the BFF locker room! The room has no one in it, but it's lavishly decorated with all sorts of memoribilia for the BFF. Moreland lets Harris realize where he is, but instead of Harris panicking, he screams out a battlecry and attacks Moreland mercilessly! He sits on Moreland and punches and punches and punches, demanding to know why he would take such a fight "into such a peaceful and happy area". Moreland shoves Harris off and grabs an autographed baseball bat that was on display on the wall. He threatens the all-BFF display and shouts "These'll ALL be memories!" He winds up to swing, and Harris grabs the mic:

"I quit! You can beat me into oatmeal but DON'T BREAK OUR STUFF!"

Harris cries as Glaw rings the bell.

WINNER in 14:23 and Still Onslaught champion - Davin Moreland

LOS DEFENESTRATORS vs. DH MAGNUSSON & SPIN HANSEN – OOWF World Tag Team Title Match

Hansen enters first, and with no flash at all, sidles over to the corner to wait, and watches Magnusson's equally demure yet determined entrance with interest. Magnusson and Hansen go nose to nose in the corner as Los Def make their hyperactive lucha entrance and slide into the ring. Spin nods at Magnusson who nods back, then Hansen steps under the ropes onto the apron. Magnusson turns, and walks straight into an eye-poke from Ecosistema, who whips the stunned Jersey native to the ropes, and meets him with a dropkick on the way back. 'OLE' he shouts to the crowd as Magnusson hits the deck. He poses for a second, only to turn round and see Magnusson up, and grinning at him. Ecosistema goes to tag our, but Magnusson drops him with a ferocious southpaw jab, then picks him up and hits a killer vertical suplex, that leaves Ecosistema flopping about the ring like a fish out of water. Ecosistema starts to try and tag out, but Magnusson grabs his foot and tosses him bodily into his turnbuckle. Ecosistema is dazed and Magnusson lifts him into the Tree of Woe, then sticks his hand out to tag in Spin. Hansen nods in appreciation and steps into the ring, and turns to lay a beating on Ecosistema but gets charged in the back and it seems kidney punched with some knucks by El Voltaje. Magnusson charges into the ring nails El Voltaje with a running clothesline! The referee grabs Magnusson and orders him back into the corner. Magnusson looks annoyed, but goes obediantly. Spin is clearing the cobwebs as Ecosistema gets himself free on the turnbuckle and dives off the top and takes the kneeling Spin down with a bulldog. We have both men down in the middle of the ring and crawling for their corners and we get HOT TAGS! Magnusson roars into the ring, but El Voltake slides under his legs, then comes off the ropes with a fltying leg lariat. Magnusson is knocked silly, and El Voltaje goes for a standing moonsault, but Spin drags Magnusson away by the feet and nails the dazed El Voltaje with a headbutt just as the referee orders him out of the ring. Again we have two men crawling for the corners, and HOT TAGS! Spin avoids Ecosistema's wild swing, and lifts him with a Todesfall for 1-2 NO! Ecosistema pulls El Voltaje away. Spin is enraged and goes out of the ring to chase El Voltaje, but as the go back through the ring, Ecosistema nails him with a drop toehold, and El Voltaje comes back and smashes Spin with a Shining Wizard to the face. However as El Voltaje goes to shout 'Ole', Magnusson drops hi with a haymaker, making him roll out of the ring. Ecosistema tries to drop Magnusson with a Go2Sleep, but Magnusson grabs his arm and twists into a DDT. The referee orders Magnusson out of the ring again, but he just grins and calmly steps under the ropes. Spin makes his way to his feet as Ecosistema stands up groggily, and Spin nails him with e headbutt and then lifts him into a muscle buster. As he holds Ecosistema in the air, he turns to face Magnusson and nods, so Magnusson tags himself in on Spin's arm. Spin drops Ecosistema with the Spinal Justice, and then calmly steps outside the ring. Magnusson picks up ther semi-conscious Ecosistema and nails the russian legsweep and rolls through into Dream Street! Ecosistema is fading fast, but as the referee drops his hand the first time, El Voltaje slides into the ring and smashes Magnusson with a steel chair! The referee is calling for the bell as Spin erupts into the ring, only to get a side-on chair to the gut, then a huge blow from the chair over the back of the head.

YOUR WINNERS, in 8:19 as result of a disqualification are SPIN HANSEN & D H MAGNUSSON (Los Defenestrators retain the OOWF Tag Team Titles)

After the bell, Los Def make a quick getaway with the belts, and Spin & DH get to their feet, both looking pretty pissed off, then they nod at each other in a respectful, manly way, then make their own way to the back.....

OUTBACK JACK vs. LD WILLIAMS – OOWF Intercontinental Title Match

Williams enters first, looking steely eyed, still taping up his wrists as he waits for Jack in the ring. OBJ comes out, carrying a crate of Fosters and slides itno the ring. LD stands aside as OBJ hits all four corners, downing a can at each, then grabbed a mike and started to belch into the mike...when LD charges him in the back, knocking him to the floor. LD laughs as OBJ gets to his feet, winded and the bell rings. OBJ looks reaslly ticked off as LD motions for him to 'come on.' They lock up and OBJ uses his FURY to force LD onto one knee, but William,s drops a shoulder and locks OBJ into a side headlock. OBJ tries to roll through, but LD transitions into and armbar but releases quickly and gets to his feet. OBJ gets to his feet, shaking the hurt out of his arm. LD gives him no time and lays in with a flurry of blows, focussing on the hurted shoulder. Jack staggers back and doubles up and LD goes to nail a DDT but Jack is playing possum and smashes him with an uppercut. LD staggers back, bleeding from the mouth, and Jack presses his assault, landing a flurry of blows, followed up with a headbutt that staggers LD. Jack hooks him for a double underhook DDT, but LD rears up and backdrops Jack, and both guys hit the mat, gasping for breath. They both get to their feet and charge each other, taking one another over the top rope. LD clears the cobwebs first and grabs a half-upright OBJ abd whips him into the turnbuckle post, then follows up with a lariat that knocks Jack onto his back. LD grabs the ring steps and drops them on Jack's head, despite the referee's protestations then rolls into the ring to break the count. The ref takes LD to task, and LD stands there and tells the official how it is, then rolls out of the ring to continue the assault on Jack. However, Jack low blows him as he reaches down, and rams his head into the barricade. Jack gets to his feet and drops LD with a headbutt, then starts throttling LD with the wire for the mobile steadycam! The referee is screaming at Jack, as he rolls back into the ring, and belches in the officials face. Jack rolls to the outside as LD gets to his feet on the other side, and both men slide into the ring, wielding chairs! They each aim a skull-crushing blow at the other, but the chairs bounce off each other, leaving both men with shaken arms, but they both wind up for another shot - as the referee rolls out of the ring and calls for the bell!

YOUR RESULT, in 7:18 is a DOUBLE DISQUALIFICATION (Outback Jack retains the Intercontinental Title)

Both competitors look stunned, and OBJ loses his concentration, allowing LD to paste him with the chair, laying Jack clean out. LD smirks, then drops the chair and makes his way to the back...

STANK vs. KNIFE – OOWF World Heavyweight Title Match

Stare down in the middle of the ring. Trash talk from Stank gets no rise out of the Knife, so the champ looks to pie face the challenger. Knife sees it coming, ducks under and snatches the hand for an arm bar. Stank uses his weight to push Knife into the ropes, but that's exactly what the challenger is expecting, and he promptly snaps the arm across the top rope. Separation, Stank scowling as he nurses his elbow (and his pride); Knife looking almost Seraphically calm. Lock-up, and Stank uses his weight to throw Knife to the mat and tries to drop the (uninjured) elbow. Knife rolls out of the way, snatches the arm and slams it on the mat, then stomps the elbow and shoulder a few times before backing off from a big swing of Stank's left hand. The champ to his feet, rolling both shoulders as he tests how much damage has been done. Sudden rush from the big man! LARIAT~! The impact pinwheels Knife to the ground. Stank rebounds off the ropes and drops a fist. This one connects, but when Stank goes for the cover Knife grabs a quick roll-up. That gets a two count before the champ powers out with a bellow of frustration. Stank looks to wear Knife down with a wristlock but Knife shows surprising power to slide out with a fireman's carry. Standing switches as the two men jostle for control. They end up in the corner. Clean break. The action goes to the mat and the champ locks in the head scissors. Can you imagine the Stank from that? Knife does a headstand to setup an escape but Stank elbows him hard in the back to cut him off. Elbows to the knee give Knife enough room to wriggle out and he promptly slaps on a headlock. Stank powers to his feet and backdrops out but Knife pops up and snatches a front face lock.. Stank goes into the ropes. Clean break, but as soon as they're clear of the ropes, Knife grabs a side headlock: he's clearly trying to starve the big man of air. Must have been watching his CM Punk tapes. Back into the ropes and this time Stank's frustration gets the better of him as he chops Knife's chest on the break. Knife? Slaps on a headlock. Stank looks to suplex him off but Knife somehow hangs on. Stank's frustration is really showing now. He tries to backdrop his way out but Knife sweeps his leg. Roll-up! One! Two! Thr- Stank kicks out. The champ bails to the floor, kicking the barriers and tossing chairs around in his anger at how close he came to being pinned. Knife waits calmly on the inside. Stank back in. They tie up and Stank uses his power to overbear Knife, but the challenger manages to kick one hand free and rains strikes down on the other arm to force the champ to break. As soon as he does, Knife hits a standing dropkick to the shoulder, ducks a clothesline, and - SUPERKICK TO THE SHOULDER~! The champ is reeling. He drops to one knee. Knife dropkicks him in the face, springs up, and leg drops the damaged arm. Stank manages to kick him off before he can cover, but can't take up the offensive himself. Instead he rolls away to give his arm a change to recover. Knife on the offensive: he grabs another side headlock, deliberately coming at the side with the weakened arm. Stank can't elbow his way free, but does eventually manage to drive Knife's back into one of the turnbuckles and escape the hold that way. Earlier in the match, this might have been a clean break. Now, Stank lays in with closed fists and forearms from his good arm. Knife slumps in the corner. Running boot scrape from the champ, then he hauls Knife into the middle of the ring and slaps on a Boston Crab. He can't hold both legs due to his injured arm, so he transitions to a half Boston, really sitting down into it to wrench on Knife's back. The challenger just manages to make the ropes, but the momentum has clearly shifted. Chops and kicks from the champ, then a thunderous DDT, but it only gets two as Knife squirms out and bails to the floor to get some space. Stank climbs through the ropes to follow but that's exactly what Knife has been waiting for: he grabs the tops rope and leaps onto the apron: STAB~! Stank flies off the apron and slams into the barriers. A lesser man would be comatose but the champ surges to his feet with a bellow of rage, blood streaming from his forehead. He doesn't look to steady though and Knife tries to press the advantage by looking for a rana off the apron. Acting on instinct, the champ snatches the challenger out of the air: POWER BOMB TO THE FLOOR~! Both men slump to the concrete. The ref starts a ten count but at eight both men manage to drag themselves back inside. Weary looking lock-up, and Knife slides up to grab the head again, but this time when Stank immediately heads to the ropes the challenger spins the hold around and lands a mule kick to the face. Then he hits a couple more for good measure, but the following cover only gets two. Knife still on the attack: a neckbreaker and an implant DDT gets another two. Knife locks in a crossface chicken wing, really wrenching on the neck and arm. Stank fights it, fades, then comes back enough to just get his straining fingers to the ropes. Break and both men are back up. Knife looks for the STAB to finish things but it's one trip to the well too many in this match. Stank snatches the foot, hooks the challenger's knee over the ropes, and lays into him with MASSIVE forearms as the ref vainly calls for a break. The champ finally stops when the 5-count hits 4 and 9/10s, then promptly lariats Knife out of his boots. Cover, and if the ropes weren't right there it would be over, but the challenger grabs them at two. The champ hauls Knife up, then clotheslines him down. Stank to the second rope. STANKONIA! One! Two! Thre- KNIFE KICKS OUT~! The crowd goes berserk. Even the ref is clutching at his hair in amazement. Stank certainly can't believe it, but he recovers enough to lift Knife onto his shoulders, ready for the STANK-U. He's underestimated his opponent, however, as Knife slides off the back and locks in the rear naked choke! Now all those headlocks come into play as the already oxygen starved champion fights for breath. He staggers for the ropes, but stumbles to one knee as Knife does everything he can to drag the champ to the mat. Stank flails his good arm, but can't land a blow. The ref's asking the question, the champ's shaking his head, the crowd are on their feet - and then with one last gasp of energy Stank manages to roll his weight on top of Knife. The challenger's death grip on the champ suddenly turns against him as his shoulders are pinned to the mat, and he can't extricate himself in time. 1! 2! 3!
WINNER BY PINFALL IN 42:53 AND STILL OOWF WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION -- STANK!

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[My5:]