OOWF MidWeek Mayhem
Live! From Resolute, Nunavut Canada
July 2. 2014
RORY ALBRIGHT vs. SPIDER MCNULTY”The Rage” from Judas Priest plays and out comes Spider McNulty. He saunters to the ring and pauses at the steps to the mainly cheers from the crowd. There’s a few boos and McNulty shakes his head at those. He wipes his feet on the apron and climbs inside to get the pre-match instructions from Fall Rivers Own Angelo Barros.
Skid Row’s “18 & Life” signals the arrival of Rory Albright. He gets the similar mixed reaction from the crowd. Carrie ‘Trouble’ Weiss follows him out and takes a place at ringside and this one’s underway.These two big men sidle up next to each other and both nod in understanding. Rory scoop slams Spider and steps back. Spider gets to his feet and scoop slams Rory. Rory gets to his feet. Both nod in approval of the other’s prowess. The next five minutes of the match consists of power moves: suplexes, throws, power slams, clotheslines and the like.
Spider eventually gets Rory up for a vertical suplex and holds him there. And holds. And holds. Rory’s face is beet red from all the blood rushing to it. Finally, Spider drops back and Rory hits the mat hard. Spider covers for a two count.
Spider gives the ref a look and Carrie is pounding the mat trying to get Rory to get up. Spider goes over and leans over the ropes starting to jaw with Carrie. She hops up on the apron and gets right in Spider’s face to the point that Barros has to come over and separate the two. Barros orders Weiss off the apron and to the floor with a warning that he’ll toss her from ringside if she’s on the apron again during the match.
McNulty gives Carrie a finger wag about getting involved, but he’s not been paying attention to Albright. Rory’s gotten to his feet. As Spider backs up, Rory gives him a solid shot to the kidneys and Spider bounces off the ropes. Rory picks him up and PLANKS HIM!
Albright with the cover! ONE! TWO! THREE!
Your winner in 6:10... RORY ALBRIGHT!Rory rolls out of the ring and he and Carrie make their way to the back as Spider beats the mat in frustration.MATT FOLZ, MAI MUYO, ECOSYSTEM & TOMMY WILDER vs. THE SUICIDE KINGS – LBI Eight Man Tag Team MatchV Shaped Mind's MONSTERS brings out the Suicide Kings who do NOT appear to be happy about this contest. Christian Carter, arm in arm with Alexis Darling, lead Jason Allen, Jose Reyna, and the mysterious masked man to the ring. They all enter the ring and raise their arms in unison.
BATTLE WITHOUT HONOR OR HUMANITY brings out Matt Folz, Tommy Wilder, Ecosystem, and Mai Muyo. Folz has a microphone and isn't afraid to use it.
MF: So, Christian, made up your mind yet?
CC: (After Alexis hands him a mike) We'll talk about that later.
MF: Fine. What we'll talk about NOW is the fact that you have five guys down there...oh wait, that's Alexis. Well, same difference. You have five down there and we just have four. This isn't gonna work.
AD: (Taking the mike away from Carter) That's because, you silly boy, I'm a manager and this man is my assistant. Therefore, since I'm wrestling, he can be at ringside with us.
And that brings out GM TheNate.
GmtN: Alexis, this man is not licensed as a manager and is not on the contract for this match. Therefore, I am ordering him away from ringside, and if he interferes in this match in any way, each member of the Kings will be fined.
AD: Like we care.
GmtN: And additionally, the Kings will be banned from any championship opportunities for the next 90 days.
AD: (to the masked man) Get out.
The masked man starts to come up the ramp, but sees the wrestlers there and opts to jump the railing and head to the back. Eco takes the mike.
Eco: Oh Nate, could you come over here for a second and hold this mike? Please?
Nate rolls his eyes as Juni takes off his tie, jacket and shirt.
Eco: See, Christian, you and your buddy there think I'm pulling all the strings here. But think about it for a second. If I WAS, why wouldn't I be granting myself some world title matches, maybe a tag title for Mai and myself?
CC: Because you're a stupid slant eyed idiot?
Eco: Back to character, eh, Christian? Well, I may not have started this war, but I think we'll finish it. Gentlemen, Mai, shall we?
The face team (Folz and Eco...faces? Oh well...) takes off down the ramp and slide into the ring. The Kings of course have a momentary advantage but the tide slowly turns. There are two referees at ringside and they have already lost control of this match so they just call for the bell and let the Pier 8 continue. Of course with all the action the referees can't catch everything. Like Jason Allen catching Tommy Wilder with a low shot before hoisting him up for a Royal Flush. But Tommy reverses it into a GRAVITY KILLS! Alexis hits an Air Raid Crash on Mai, then picks her up for a Powerbomb, but (Say it along with me) YOU CAN'T POWERBOMB MAI MUYO! Mai grabs Alexis' hair and faceplants her into the middle of the ring. Ecosystem barely ducks Jose Reyna's Falcon Kick and nails him with a deft blow to the fishing tackle. Eco then turns to the crowd as if to say “What?” Folz and Carter are just tearing it up and like others, Carter kicks Folz low and locks in the double underhook for the Fall From Grace. But as Carter picks up Folz, Eco dives at Carter hitting a chop block that has Carter holding his knee. Wilder lays on the Moe-do on Allen, then locks in the Buzzkill! Mai ties up Alexis with the Trinitarian Choke, Eco ties up Reyna with the Endgame, and Folz drops a knee or two into the clipped knee of Carter before locking in a Really good STF (not the Cena variety) and eventually someone taps out...
WINNERS in 9:45 – Matt Folz, Tommy Wilder, Ecosystem and Mai Muyo – Team 1 Leads 1-0
One by one the faces release their holds, making sure the Kings stay down long enough for them to bet back up the ramp where they all hold their hands up as the winners....Folz lingers for a moment and watches the Kings get to their feet. He stares daggers into Carter. When Folz turns to leave, he gets SLAMMED in the face by the masked man! Folz drops to the ground, and we see why, the masked man has a lead pipe in his hand! Wilder, Eco and Mai all start back toward the ring, but Alexis, Reyna and Allen grab chairs and hold them off while the masked man rolls Folz into the ring.
Carter grabs a mic looking at Matt Folz...
CC: Get use to laying on you back, because this is going to be what your doing for the rest of your life...Granted, I didn't want to face you but, this is just too much to pass up...but lets get one thing straight, if you think for one second that I'm bluffing, don't...I have the contract right here...
The masked man comes in the ring, and pulls paperwork from his pocket...along with a pen.
CC: Now I've signed everything and put down my stipulation...The only thing I haven't signed is the big signature on the last page...
Carter takes the pen, flips the contract to the last page, and signs his name and shows it to the camera.
CC: Now it's official...Christian Carter vs Matthew Folz...the last match that these idiots will ever see of Matthew in the OOWF...
Carter tosses it on the motionless Folz...He starts to walk to the ring ropes, but stop...
CC: Oh yeah...I almost forgot...as you lay there, unable to get up Matthew, it reminds me of MY stipulation...So whenever the OOWF officials book this match...I'm assuming the next PPV...it will be Christian Carter vs Matthew Folz, you career on the line, in a LAST MAN STANDING MATCH...
Carter drops the mic and walks out of the ring.
POWER vs. DANIELLA MURPHYPower comes out first to a respectable face pop. Daniella Murphy is out next to a big welcome back chant. Daniella smiles and even pauses to high five a fan wearing an Outback Jack T-shirt. Once both women are in the ring, the ref goes over last minute instructions. The bell is called for and this one is underway.
Both women immediatly lock up, not bothering with the feeling out phase. Addrenaline is behind Daniella, and she starts to muscle Power back into the corner. Power is able to put on the brakes and starts muscling her way back to the center of the ring. Both employ a strength based style, and it clearly shows. Murphy shifts her weight and sends Power down with a quick hip toss. She misses on the followup elbow drop attempt, and Power takes over with some quick boots and a scoop slam. Power covers but only gets one.
As Power is pulling Murphy backup, she cuts her off with a quick jab, and then pulls her into a shortarm clothesline. Murphy covers, but also only gets one. For the next several minutes the match remains fairly even as each women is able to land stiff strikes and powerfull slams wearing each other down without getting a sizeable advantage. The endgame comes when Daniella whips Power into the corner turnbuckle and charges in. Power is able to dodge at the last minute, but Murphy's momentum sends her shoulder first into the ringpost. As she stumbles back, Power catches her with a schoolgirl rollup. Daniella kicks out a millisecond too late, and this one is over.
Your winner in 13:17 via pinfall Power
After the match Murphy tries to tell the ref she kicked out, but he lets her know it was just that close. Daniella looks a little frustrated, but leaves without incident leaving Power to celebrate in the ring.
ALEXANDER DARLING, DK MURPHY & DANNY TAYLOR vs. MOOSEHEAD JACK, CHLOE & CHRIS EVANS – LBI Six Man Tag Team MatchEveryone makes their standard entrances, as referee Mel Creech nervously keeps the teams apart. Chris Evans is the last to enter, and once he’s in the war of words commences (well, except for Danny, who makes due with glares). Alex pushes a button by asking Moose where Chloe’s leash is, and it’s on. Chloe screams and hurls herself at Alex, everyone else backs to their corners, and Creech calls for the bell.
Chloe slams into Alex and drives him to the mat. She sits on his chest and hammers him with forearms, then tries to claw out his eyes. Alex grabs her wrists to hold her off, and she drives her forehead into his nose, causing it to start pouring blood. Chloe admires her handiwork, smiles, and leans over to lick Alex’s cheek, which causes him to freak out and throw her off. Chloe rolls to her knees and explodes off the mat, but runs straight into a right hand. Alex pulls Chloe up into a headlock and drags her to his corner to tag DK.
Alex holds Chloe open for a shot to the ribs from DK, then shoves her into DK’s arms so that he can hit a German suplex. DK bridges, but Cleo kicks out at two. DK is up first and slams an elbow into Cleo’s head, then hits a series of lefts and rights before sending her to the ropes. Chloe grabs the top strand to stop her momentum, so DK storms after her, but she ducks at the last second and low bridges him, sending him tumbling to the floor. She rolls along the ropes to her corner and tags in Moose.
Moose steps into the ring and immediately goes out after DK. He tries to pitch him into the ringpost, but Murphy reverses, sending Moose into the steel. Murphy charges in with a big boot, but Moose dodges and he kicks the post. Moose wipes blood out of his eyes and grabs DK before he can recover, then slams his head repeatedly into the the steel. Creech’s count reaches seven, but Chloe is back in the ring to interrupt it. While the ref is distracted, Moose grabs a chair and tries to slam it into DK’s head, but Murphy kicks it back into his face. DK stuffs Moose back into the ring, leaving his neck on the apron, and drives his elbow repeatedly into his throat before climbing into the ring. DK grabs Moose’s legs and falls back, driving his throat into the bottom rope. He drags Moose out of the ropes and covers, but Moose kicks out at one.
DK pulls Moose to his feet and stuns him with a European uppercut. He grabs Moose and plants him with a belly-to-belly suplex, then hits a leaping legdrop. He skips the cover and pulls Moose up to set him up for a piledriver. Moose blocks and tries to backdrop out of it, but DK pummels him with forearms. He drags Moose to the corner and makes the tag to Danny. The Drink and Destroy members take turns hammering Moose with punches, then take him over with a tandem suplex. Danny covers, but Moose kicks out at two.
Danny is up first and grabs Moose, who connects with a low blow that Creech naturally doesn’t see. Danny staggers, and Moose slams into him with a clothesline. This knocks Danny back into his own corner, but Moose doesn’t hesitate to enter enemy territory. He smashes Alex in the face with a forearm and and takes a punch to the back of the head from DK. Moose shrugs it off and grabs Taylor, who breaks his grip, grabs him around the throat, and hits a choke-bomb. Danny holds Moose to the mat, and gets a two-count before Chloe slams into him with a dropkick. Evans is in as well, which brings in Danny’s partners. Before he enters the ring, however, Alex slaps Danny on the shoulder, making himself the legal man.
DK pulls Chloe off of Danny and tosses her across the ring. Chloe lands rolling and launches herself back at him, driving an elbow into his throat. DK staggers, choking, and Chloe plants her head in his chin and drops, jacking his jaw. She pounces on him and starts bouncing his head off the mat. Meanwhile, Evans connects with a superkick on Alex, then grabs him before he falls and buries a knee in his midsection. He snaps him over with a suplex and stomps him into the mat. Moose and Danny have gotten back to their feet and exchanging punches. Moose slips one and kicks Danny toward Evans, who springs off the second rope and drives an elbow into his head. Danny stumbles backwards, and Moose hooks his neck from behind and drags him back, driving the back of Danny’s head into his knee. Moose rolls Danny over and locks in the Jiendo, and Evans kicks Alex under the ropes and follows him out. Chloe sees this and drags DK under the ropes as well. Moose snarls at Creech to check Danny , but the referee refuses and starts counting. As they argue, Alex reverses a whip and sends Evans hard into the ring steps. Creech informs Moose that Alex is the legal man, and Moose turns just in time for Alex to spring off the ropes and nail him with a missile dropkick. He stays on Moose as he lands, rolling to his feet and driving a knee into his head. He winds the arm and pulls it across Moose's throat, lifting him onto his shoulders. Before he can hit the Darling Driver, Chloe slides back into the ring. Creech cuts her off, but the distraction is enough for Moose to break free. Alex turns around, and Moose blasts him with a chop to the throat. He sends him to the ropes but Alex reverses. Chloe sneaks past Creech and kicks Alex in the back, which knocks him off balance and allows Moose to hit the Busaiku knee. Moose drags Alex to the corner and tags in Evans.
Evans grabs Alex and whips him toward Moose, who connects with a forearm. Moose spins Alex around and holds him in place for an Evans superkick. Creech orders Moose out of the ring, but Moose backs away from his corner, keeping the ref occupied while Evans tosses Alex into the turnbuckles and Chloe clobbers him with one of her barbed wire-wrapped toys. This brings DK around the ring, and he sprints down the apron and spears Chloe, sending them both flying into the ringside barrier. Danny steps into the ring and heads to help Alex, but Moose shoves Creech out of the way and cuts him off. Moose swings, but Danny blocks it and drives him to the mat with a headbutt, then hauls him up and biels him across the ring. Moose rolls to his knees and hits a low blow, but Danny no sells it long enough to haul him up and belly-to-belly him over the ropes.
Meanwhile, Alex is out on his feet. Evans sets him up for the way of the future, but Alex drives an elbow into his gut and breaks free. Alex tries an Irish whip, but Evans reverses and pulls him back. Alex ducks a short-arm clothesline and gets behind Evans, kneeing him in the kidneys. He spins Evans around and lifts him for the brainbusta, but Evans gets free and drops behind him. He shoves Alex hard face-first into the turnbuckles, then turns him around - Way of the Future! Evans covers, bracing his feet on the ropes for good measure, as Creech counts One...Two...from opposite sides of the ring both Danny and DK try to break free and get back to the ring, but Moose and Chloe prevent them...Three.
WINNERS, in 13:13, Chris Evans, Chloe, and Moosehead Jack. Team 2 leads 2-1
After the match: Chloe, DK, Moose, and Danny continue to brawl, battering each other with anything that’s not nailed down, until security finally floods ringside and separates them. Inside the ring, Evans gets in a few more cheap shots on Alex before rolling under the ropes and backing up the aisle taunting the fans.
TEXPRESS vs. LD WILLIAMS & STANK – LBI Tag Team MatchTexpress, The Measuring Sticks of the OOWF, arrive at the top of the ramp and receive, what only the babiest faces that ever facey, face, could... a loud resounding ovation of praise from the... wait... no those are boos!?! Wow Canada... okay Texpress ignore the reception and head to the ring, posing for the crowd despite the mood of the fans. The Saints of Sinners, LD & Stank, The Electric Sheep of the-
Stank - No!- But I was just-
Stank - NO!- Fine then... LD & Stank continue down the ramp, raising their respective titles, to a mixed reaction from the crowd that give us cheers for LD and a majority of boos for Stank, save for the small contingent of SoS fans, in black T-Shirts, cheering enthusiastically ringside.
Stank glares at the SoS fans, as LD walks the ring steps and climbs in between the ropes. Before the bell rings however, Texpress CHARGE across and ATTACK LD Williams! The Volume of boos alert Stank to this, as he turns his attention from the SoS fans and rolls in under the bottom rope to even the odds. Before the big man can stand however, Zane drops an elbow on his chest, hops up to his feet, and puts the boots to Stank while the crowd boos and the ref tries to get Chad and LD to their respective corners. Eventually, as fists fly between the two, Chad and LD fall through the ropes and out of the ring. The ref shrugs his shoulders and thinking good enough. He calls for the official start of the match and the bell rings. Zane has not let up on his offense as he has Stank REELING to the corner! Zane chops (WOOOO!) the wide chest of Stank recoiling the big man in pain!
Order is restored outside the ring as Chad and LD are finally separated and make it to their respective corners. LD appears to be busted wide open, blood flowing down his forehead! Chad appears frazzled, but none the worse for wear. He watches intently as Zane continues his beatdown of Stank in the corner who slumps down to the mat. Zane backs his way to the opposite corner then CHARGES, nailing Stank with a knee to his face! Zane ROARS as Stank falls over to his side with a glassy eyed look on his face and blood trickling out of his nose. Zane drags Stank out of the corner and covers, but hops up to his feet and delivers a CLOTHESLINE FROM AW HELLFIRE to LD Williams, as Canada's native son attempts to make the save! Zane is on FIRE tonight!
Zane pops back up and turns around to see Stank rolling out of the ring. LD Williams does the same and the two meet trying to regroup. As they do so, Chad climbs into the ring and gives his partner a knowing look. Texpress run the ropes while the crowd buzzes and come back with a NO HANDS PLANCHA onto LD Williams by Chad, while at the same time, Zane SUICIDE DIVES THROUGH THE ROPES at Stank bringing all four men to the floor! Texpress scramble to their feet and don't let up on their offense as Chad pulls a bloody LD Williams up and SLINGS him into the STEEL STEPS while Zane rolls Stank back into the ring under the bottom rope! The ref calls for order, threatening to disqualify Texpress if Chad doesn't get back to his corner! Chad relents as LD crawls back toward his corner.
Meanwhile Zane has made several nearfalls after various high impact moves, but Stank keeps kicking out at TWO! Zane tags in Chad who hops the ropes, charges and nails a kneeling Stank with a SHINING WIZARD! Cover 1... 2.. NO! Stank gets his shoulder up! Chad tags in Zane who hits RUNNING SENTON on Stank! He stands to his feet then mounts Stank with repeated elbows to Stank's head eventually busting his forehead open! Zane stands to his feet and roars at the crowd who boo him without mercy! What the Hell has gotten into Texpress?
Zane pulls Stank to his feet and DRIVES the big man into the Texpress corner! Tag is made and Chad climbs the corner seating himself on the top while raining down fists to the top of Stank's already bloodied head! Zane spies LD finally making his way up to the apron and CHARGES SPEARING LD THROUGH THE ROPES and OFF THE APRON! Meanwhile, Chad HEADBUTTS then resumes punching away at Stank's head as the crowd counts ONE! TWO! THREE! FOUR! FIVE! SIX! SEV- Uh oh! Stank blocks the seventh punch, pulls down on Chad's head and HITS a desperation CRADLE TO THE GRAVE!
Both men are down as the crowd pops huge despite themselves! Stank wearily rolls over and drapes an arm over Chad Madison's chest for the...
...One, TWO, THREEE?... NO!!!!
Zane Meyers rushes in and makes the SAVE at the last split second!
Zane pulls Stank to his feet, and in an impressive show of strength, he hefts the three hundred pounder onto his shoulders for the TORTURE RACK, but Stank slips off and REVERSES, lifting Zane onto his shoulders and delivering a STANK-U!
The crowd pops again and begins chanting THIS IS AWESOME as all three men lie motionless in the ring!
LD Williams eventually pulls himself up to the apron and rolls in under the bottom rope, as Stank and Chad stir, pushing themselves up to their hands and knees. Chad is just a step quicker, as he rushes up to his feet, and charges at Stank who sidesteps the cowboy, whipping him into the waiting arms of LD Williams's CANADIAN DESTROYER!!
Stank covers as LD scoots back and slumps in the corner!
One..
Two...
THREE!
Your Winners in 21:32 - LD Williams and Stank!! – Team 2 leads 5-1The Saints of Sinners roll out the ring and meet at the bottom of the ramp. The ref slides out and raises both their arms in victory! Bloodied and exhausted, the OOWF Onslaught and Intercontinental Champions grin evilly as their Championship Belts are handed to them and they stumble their way up the ramp knowing they barely survived. Zane crawls his way over to check on his partner as LD and Stank turn around at the top of the ramp, breathing heavily, glaring at Texpress inside the ring, and smiling through crimson masks.
SHANE TUSKA vs. MIRANDA WILLIAMSNice chain wrestling sequence to start that ends when Miranda bridges for a 2 count, followed by Tuska reversing for 2, followed by Miranda reversing again for another 2 count. Both get to their feet as Miranda smiles. They lock up again and Tuska uses his strength advantage to drive Miranda to the ropes. He gives a clean break, but then catches Miranda with a sweet overhead belly to belly suplex as she charges out of the corner. Tuska heads up top and hits a fist drop, followed by a side suplex. Tuska pulls her up and rocks her with a European uppercut that sends her staggering back to the corner, then charges in and nails her with a back elbow to the jaw. Brainbuster gets 2. He heads up top and looks for a moonsault, but Miranda moves out of the way.
Miranda gets to her feet quickly and nails Tuska with a Shining Wizard. Tuska staggers to his feet only to be hit by a picture perfect spinebuster. Northern Lights Suplex gets 2. Superkick connects and Miranda sets Tuska up and hits a Curbstomp. She covers....Tuska just rolls his shoulder at the last split second. Miranda looks for the Canadian Destroyer, but Tuska escapes and quickly rolls her into a small package. 1.....2........3. Miranda kicks out just a millionth of a second too late.
Winner in 6:35, Shane Tuska.
Post match, Miranda is disappointed, but shakes Tuska's hand as the crowd applauds both of their efforts.
GHOSTHEAD vs. STAN FULTON – LBI Singles MatchStan Fulton and Ghosthead make their entrances, in that order. The crowd is ready for this match, as they just weren't satisfied by all the blood shed at the pay-per-view. And these two do not disappoint. Straight from the outset, we get a level of viciousness seldom seen, even in the OOWF, as both me literally throw everything but the kitchen sink at each other. The rafters echo over the crowd noise with throw after throw, slam after slam, chop after chop, suplex after suplex. Eventually Fulton gets a bit of offense strung together. He throws Ghosthead into the corner and then follows him in with a big splash. Ghosthead tries to crumple, but Fulton will have none of that, and props him up and applies a few more chops. He whips Ghost into the far ropes and then big clothesline's him over the ropes. Ghosthead survives to stand on the apron though, so Fulton takes another rope run and goes to knock him off, only to be greeted by an elbow to the face. Ghost leaps over the ropes and takes Fulton by surprise, hitting the SIDE EFFECT~! He's unable to lock on the Anaconda Vice for the second part of that though, as Fulton muscles his way to his feet. Fulton makes a lap around the ring and as he reaches Ghosthead he grabs him for a RUNNING POWER SLAM~! Ghosthead has the wind knocked out of him, and Fulton covers, one...two...NO~! Ghosthead and Fulton get to their feet and begin trading punches back and forth and back. Unfortunately, those are closed-fisted punches, so Referee Hightower steps between them to remind them of this very important rule. When you think about it, that's really not the wisest course of action, and predictably, Hightower pays the price. He's out cold.
Neither of them being particularly facey, Fulton and Ghost don't care. No referee just gives them carte blanche and they take it, and begin wailing on each other even MORE than they were, and who knew that was possible. As they do, Referee Creech comes running down and he manages to give them the warning WITHOUT getting punched in the face. Ghosthead pounces first and grabs Fulton for a quick suplex and then pin, one..two...NO! Ghosthead runs the ropes as Fulton stands and EIDELON~! driving Fulton into the ropes. Referee Hightower is beginning to stir. Fulton uses the ropes to his advantage and turns it into a BODY AVALANCHE~! Fulton gets the pin, one, two...NO~! Crusher decides to climb to the second turnbuckle and gets ready for THE CRUSHER. He leaps, but there's no one there, as Ghosthead has rolled out of his way to his feet. Crusher gets to his feet, just as Ghost goes for the LEAPING TRIANGLE CHOKE~! and locks in the PHANTASMAGORIA~! Ghosthead locks it in and falls backward. Creech asks Fulton if he wants to quit, and Fulton, barely, shakes his head. Hightower is starting to wipe the cobwebs from his eyes, and looks over to see what's going on. He crawls that way. Crusher leans forward just slightly, putting Ghosthead's shoulders to the mat, but Ghosthead cranks on tighter. Hightower counts, one. Fulton's hand goes up and starts to shake. Hightower counts two. Fulton's hand shakes more. Hightower's hand falls THREE at EXACTLY the same time Fulton starts to tap. Both Creech and Hightower call for the bell, and get it....but who won? The two referees start arguing and pantomiming while Ghosthead and Fulton each try to plead their case.
While confusion reigns over the finish, both teams race to the ring to argue their case. The rest of the locker room, Tuska, Power, Miranda, Daniella Murphy, Spider McNulty, Rory Albright and Banned From Everywhere make their way to the ring as well trying to keep things from exploding into a riot. Just when it looks like all hell is going to break loose, we hear
No Chance play and Vince McMahon and Eric O’Mac walk out from the back. The crowd IMMEDIATELY tries to boo them both out of the building. Vince has a mic, and looks quite amused.
You’ll have to excuse me if I appear to be a little out of sorts. You see, as Chairman and CEO of the WWE, I am used to running shows in Madison Square Garden in New York City, or shows in Chicago, or Los Angeles…….but I wouldn’t even send my worst enemies to this icy hell hole.<the crowd boos this loudly>
Now, I am sure you are all wondering why I am here. You see….it was just about four years ago that I gave this little federation of miscreants the chance to shine on the brightest stage imaginable. I lowered myself to working with cretins like Moosehead Jack and Alexander Darling and……STANK. And how was my generosity repaid?<the crowd roars at this, and the OOWFers in the ring all share a laugh as well>
NO ONE humiliates Vincent Kennedy McMahon! NO ONE! For nearly four years I sat back and waited for my opportunity. I have seen them all come and go. The UWF, the AWA, Memphis, hell even the mighty WCW…..not only did I crush them……I OWN THEM. So…..I thought, what better way to destroy the OOWF than to just buy it and destroy it? I mean, hell, I have a few hundred bucks lying around, couldn’t possibly take more than that to buy up THIS freakshow. So I sent Eric to convince GM Corbitt to sell…….but Nate……Nate is a stubborn, stubborn man. Well, let me let each and every one of you in on one thing…..there is no one alive that is more stubborn than Vincent Kennedy McMahon. When I want something, I get it.
By any means necessary<with those words, WWE superstars pour through the crowd, each one brandishing weapons. They storm the ring and attack. The OOWF puts up a good fight, but you know, weapons and all. The whole time Vince and Eric stand at the top of the ramp and laugh at the slaughter going on before them. Before too long, the OOWF wrestlers are all laid out and John Cena and the rest of the WWE stand over their bloody bodies in the middle of the ring. Vince certainly looks pleased>
Now THAT is how you make a statement! You see……what you miscreants just saw was the absolute BEST sports entertainers in the world today. You saw firsthand what they can do. Now…..I will make this simple, so even the fans of this degenerate organization will understand. The OOWF WILL be mine. As a friend of mine used to say, every man has his price, and I know it is just a matter of time until I get what I want. I promise you this, until I get what I want……you will know it is coming, but you won’t know where, you won’t know how, and you won’t know who. After all…….I am a business man before anything else, and I have had my eyes on a few of you on the roster. Some of you have reached out to me, understandably so, I will say this…….I will be in touch, and Eric……Eric will be around to give you your orders. Until then……you misfits have fun working in front of crowds of Eskimos in the frozen asshole of CanadaVince drops the mic and he and Eric raise their hands in victory. The camera focuses on the several OOWF wrestlers both inside and outside the ring, bloody and beaten, trying to get to their feet, while the WWE contingent stand victoriously over them, as we fade to black, the WWE logo pops up on the screenThanks for coming out and watching LIVE OOWF action! Be sure to check out Territorial Beatings 9 PPV Live June, 27th From Old Crow, Yukon Territory, Canada! Don’t forget to catch next week’s OOWF Mid-Week Mayhem! Wednesday, July 9th 2014, Live! From Yellowknife, Northwest Territory, Canada. Did you see something you really liked? Post it here in the 2013 Awards Reminder Thread. Please join us for OOWF Chat on Wednesday nights! And be sure to check out the full OOWF Archive and read up on the 9-year plus history of the OOWF!
