OOWF MADNESS II PPV
Live, From Ypres, Belgium
MR JEALOUS vs. PREDATORJealous and Predator attack each other to start, they wail on each other with bone crushing shots, neither man able to keep any kind of advantage. Referee Gavin Hale seems to be giving these two behemoths plenty of lee way. Jealous whips Pred into the corner and follows him in, but gets caught in the mouth with an elbow. Predator grabs Jealous and throws him over the top rope and follows him to the outside. They fight along the outside, Jealous rakes the eyes and hauls Predator up for a vertical suplex, but Predator frees himself, lands behind Jealous and hits a sick release German suplex that sends the back of Jealous’ head crashing into the steel ring steps. Jealous is dazed, Predator rolls him back into the ring, throws him into the ropes and hits a spine buster. Jealous tries to get a few spots of offense in, but the man has got to be suffering a concussion and can’t see to string anything together. Predator toys with Jealous, which almost costs him when Jealous catches Pred with a short power slam. The cover only gets a two count, Jealous tries to press his advantage by whipping Pred to the corner, Pred uses his quickness and springs to the top rope, spins and nearly decapitates Jealous with a flying clothesline. That does it.
WINNER in 9:49 - Predator
SIRIRAM & SHASHWAT MISHRA vs. CORAX & ERIC O’MACSiriram and Mishra are familiar with each other and could even be called casual acquaintances. Eric O’Mac and Corax are not, they spend the whole time arguing on the way to the ring, then argue over who is going to start the match. Finally EOM waves it off and tells Corax to start things off. Corax turns as referee Angel Barros calls for the bell and walks right into a belly to belly suplex and pinning combo by Siriram. Corax frees his arm at one, but as soon as he gets to his feet Siriram takes him down with a deep arm drag. Shahswat and Siriram keep Corax trapped in the corner and Corax plays face in peril for a good portion of the match. Mishra and Siriram make a nice blend of science and violence. Siriram takes Corax to the mat with a drop toe hold and Mishra springs off the top rope dropping a fist right to the back of Corax head. SM covers, and EOM breaks it up at two. Finally after almost five minutes, Corax catches Mishra putting his head down a moment too soon and plants him with a DDT and makes the hot tag to EOM. Eric comes in and cleans house catching Mishra and Siriram with spinning heel kicks. Corax is just recovering on the apron when EOM tags him back in. Corax stares at Eric in disbelief and gets in the ring, as they stand there and argue, Siriram the legal man in the match grabs Corax from behind and locks on the Citizen Erased! Shashwat Mishra attacks EOM from the apron and pulls him to the floor and they brawl. Corax tries to escape but he is forced to tap.
WINNERS in 15:57 Shashwat Mishra & Siriram
After the match Corax and Eric O’Mac argue some more and appear to be about to come to blows when EOM waves Corax off and leaves the ring. Corax remains in the ring for a few minutes fuming over the loss.
FLY Vs. SOULDRAGONSoulDragon waits impatiently in the ring. Fly’s music hits and the fans erupt. They seem to have taken to this guy. As soon as Fly gets in the ring SD attacks and referee Mel Creech calls for the bell. SD backs Fly into the corner and destroys him with chops and forearms to the chest. This match is being fought under Onslaught rules, so SD gets a warning for using closed fists, that is his first warning. SD whips Fly to the opposite corner and follows, but Fly scales the corner and flips over SD and lands on his feet, when SD turns around he catches a perfect dropkick to the face that sends him back into the corner . Fly is on his feet and tries a monkey flip out of the corner, but SD lands on his feet and hits the ropes, but Fly elevates him, and catches him in the face as he comes back down. Fly runs to the corner and leaps to the top rope, as SD gets to his feet, Fly soars and catches SD with a cross body, but SD reverses it into a power slam, cover gets a two count. SD pulls Fly up, and ties him in the tree of woe, then runs to the opposite corner and tries a baseball slide at Fly’s head, but Fly sits up in the corner and SD crotches himself on the post. Fly frees himself and climbs to the top rope and hits the FLAVA DROP! Fly pulls SD into the middle of the ring and climbs the ropes again. Fly hits a 520 helicopter leg drop, covers, and gets the three count!
WINNER in 4:41 Fly
FIRECHILD vs. JOSH O’NEALJosh O’Neal is making his way to the ring when Firechild charges from the back and takes him down with a clothesline to the back of the head. Firechild brutally puts the boots to O’Neal as he tries to regroup on the floor. Firechild is a man possessed tonight, he pulls O’Neal to his feet and runs him face first into the steel ring post, as Josh hits the floor, FC is digging under the ring looking for something, he grabs a pair of chairs and as JO gets to his feet throws the chairs at Josh’s head, one catches him above the eye and opens a nasty gash. Referee Gavin Hale is trying to get the action in the ring, but Firechild is not interested. FC wraps the mic cord around JO and tries to choke him out. I have never seen Firechild in this way before, well not since his feud with Seraph. Josh tries to fight back, firing a few shots at FC’s midsection and shoving him onto the steel barricade. Firechild recovers quickly and grabs a chair and slams it across O’Neal’s face, right in front of the referee. Hale waives the match off. Firechild continues his attack on the bloody O’Neal. He rolls Josh on top of the Chaldean Announce Table and sets up for the Wings of Phoenix. Before he can finish the move, Capslock and Stank rush to ringside carrying chairs of their own, Firechild beats a hasty retreat through the crowd and barely escapes. The whole time his is grinning like a mad man and laughing maniacally.
WINNER – No Contest
THE TEAM FROM DOWN UNDER vs. GROUNDED IN REALITYJustin wants to start this time, but Phil tells him otherwise, and they get into an argument as the bell sounds. Sane is gesturing broadly about Phil's leg. Phil tells Justin he's gonna hit HIM with the leg if he doesn't shut up, but Sane keeps at it. Phil takes the peg leg off, and the Aussies strike~! OBJ nails JS with the BOOMERANG~! Gator clips Phil's other leg and schoolboys him for the pin!!
WINNERS in 0:39: THE TEAM FROM DOWN UNDER. Phil is pissed, and
Wally mockingly offers him his cane. Justin apologizes profusely, but Phil shoves him out of the way, reattaches his leg and goes to the back, Sane trying to catch up.
AUSTRAROO vs. MERCURYMel Creech is out for this one, Onslaught Rules as usual. Creech calls for the bell and this one is under way. Collar and elbow lock up is quickly turned into a whip my Mercury, Roo ducks a clothesline and hits the opposite ropes and slide between Merc’s legs. Roo springs to his feet and catches Merc with a knee to the midsection, the lands a tilt-a-whirl back breaker. Roo leaps to the top rope and tries a moonsalut but Merc moves out of the way and Roo lands on his feet, Merc sweeps the legs and quickly locks on the STF. Roo makes it to the ropes and forces the break, his first rope break. Both men are back to their feet. The match continues back and forth for several minutes. After about seven minutes of action, Mercury catches Roo on the ropes with a hot shot, he claims it was an accident, but it draws a warning from Creech anyway. Mercury sets Roo on the top rope and sets up for a superplex. Roo blocks it and head buts Mercury until he falls to the mat. Roo waits perched on the top rope and waits for Mercury to get to his feet, and he does, Roo flies through the air and hits a top rope neck breaker. Roo kips up to his feet and gets into position, As Mercury staggers to his feet, Roo nails him right in the mouth with a Roo Kick, covers, and gets the three count.
WINNER in 8:32 - Austraroo
NAYR vs. MATT DADDYReferee Mel Creech remains in the ring for this one, an Onslaught Rules match up between two of the best in the Onslaught Division. Nayr comes to the ring first, Matt Daddy comes out next, about half way down the ramp he stops and asks Chuck Norris to head to the back. MD hits the ring and we are set to go. Collar and elbow locks up, MD takes Nayr over with and arm drag and grinds the arm. Nayr fights to his feet and leaps onto the top rope and reverses the arm bar into a hip toss. MD leaps to his feet and Nayr grab him in a side lock and takes him to the mat. MD works to his feet and lifts Nayr for an atomic drop, then reverses it to a choke slam. Nayr’s head slams off the mat. Matt Daddy takes the smart route for the next several minutes and keeps the high flying Nayr on the mat, grind in him to the mat and working on his leg. MD applies an Indian Death Lock and nearly gets a submission, Nayr works to the ropes to save himself. MD pulls him back to the center of the ring and works on the same knee with a spinning toe hold. Once again Nayr makes it to the ropes and forces a break. Undaunted, Matt Daddy pulls him back to the middle and applies a figure four. Nayr nearly gives up this time, but once more makes it to the ropes. That was his last referee rope break. MD grabs the leg again and pulls Nayr to his feet, Nayr connects with an enzuguri, covers and gets two. The match continues, Nayr gets in some offense but each time he gains momentum, MD takes out the knee. As the ten minute time limit approaches, Nayr catches MD in the face with a handspring back elbow and goes to the top rope for a blind moonsault. Nayr leaps, MD rolls out of the way, but Nayr lands on his feet, unfortunately for him, his knee buckles. MD pounces on Nayr and locks on the STF and cross faces Nary for good measure, Nayr reaches the ropes but that can’t break the hold anymore, Nayr tries to escape, but cannot, and he cannot hold out for the time limit save and is forced to tap.
WINNER in 9:27 Matt Daddy
MICROPLAY vs. SERAPHReferee Gavin Hale is in the ring for this one. Seraph is still upset that Microplay turned on him during a tag match a few weeks ago, although you would never know it by looking at Seraph, the man’s expression never changes at all. Microplay tries to attack from behind, but Seraph side steps it and shoves Microplay into the corner, then blisters his chest with knife edge chops. Seraph whips MP across the ring to the opposite corner and follows him in with a high knee to the face, MP staggers out of the corner and Seraph takes him to the mat with a bulldog. MP bails out of the ring, but Seraph propels himself over the top rope to the floor and sends MP sprawling. MP catches a break by raking Seraph’s eyes, but his advantage is short lived, MP charges, but Seraph side steps and slips behind MP and locks him in a full nelson, then falls forward, sending MP’s head into the ring post! Seraph calmly rolls back into the ring and waits. The camera pans around the corner slowly and we see MP struggling to get to his feet, he has been busted wide open. MP climbs onto the apron and Seraph immediately grabs him and hauls him up into a vertical suplex, and holds him there for several seconds. Blood pours off of MP’s head and pools on the mat. Finally Seraph brings MP straight down, BRAIN BUSTER! Seraph spends the next several minutes brutalizing Microplay, MP is bleeding profusely. Finally after about ten minutes of carnage, Seraph sends MP to the ropes, catches him on the rebound and lifts him for a tombstone, but instead of falling on his knees he falls straight down on his backside driving MP’s head into the mat. Mercifully this one is over.
WINNER in 10:15 - Seraph
The Lights dim and Anthrax’s Looking down the barrel of a gun starts to play, smoke billows across the entrance way and a midget dressed as Fozzy bear (yes the moppet) blowing a whistle comes out. Then from the Smoke the Ax-Man makes his way to the ring wearing a knee brace. Ax-Man enters the ring and grabs a mike.
AX: Remember this Fozzy?
Fozzy blows his whistle while running around the ring.
AX: This is going to biggest PPV of the year. And as for you name of opponent, you shut up you, you’ve got nothing to do with tonight’s success. Tonight is about the Fans getting the wrestling they want to watch, old school OOWF Ax-Man style, and not the crap that they’re force to watch every week, with the likes of you, you over pushed turd. That’s right I don’t have any Hollywood script monkeys telling me what to say tonight, tonight is from the heart. Remember when the Ax-man had a vocabulary Fozzy? Remember that? Remember when I said more then, tickle my asshole honey and gargle balls baby! Remember that, when I had a chance of to use my abilities. Hey Fozzy you remember what Ax-man 4:20 use to mean?
Fozzy just shrugs his shoulders.
AX: Well I’m not sure I even use to say it, but if I did it would’ve been something along the lines of Kids, Hugs not Drugs!
You see I couple a months a go I went to the boss man and I said hey the Rick ever thought of doing a Madness II PPV, he said “Well actually I hadn’t thought of that” and I said you gotta it’ll be huge. And the date was set, for what ever today is.
And then I had to go and get this knee surgery, I tore my occipital anterior protuberance and disconnected my 3 retinas. And it pains me I had to miss tonight because right off the top of head the Madness I PPV held no special significance to me what so ever. So that made missing tonight Suck more, more than Hardbody Harris “legally unrecognized by the state commitment ceremony I was forced to attend. It sucks more then Great American Bash 2005, the over seas tours of Canada, Texas and the Christmas Special in Afghanistan I got a shit lot of heat from the front office because they said no one has to feel as though they have to go, so I said no its fucking dangerous and I don’t like Arab fundamentalist chicks they were way too much clothing, then they said that I should’ve gone and turned in to a real shit storm. But anyway I don’t want to talk about that any more.
Well that’s pretty much all I had to say so if no ones planning to do a run in I’ll guess I’ll just go.
Ax-man makes his way to leave the ring.
Wait they was something I had to, had to add. Ummmm well it seems that lets see….
Fozzy holds up 3 fingers.
AX: 3, 3 what?
Fozzy holds up 2 fingers.
AX: 2, what, sign language ummm, lets see V, umm V for Victory, no V for Vendetta, great comic by the way, no no. no, no, peace hippies Peace man, peace, 3 piece…. Ummmm.
Fozzy grabs his crotch.
AX: You gotta take a salad. You took a piece of my salad, you took 3 pieces of my salad, how do you take a piece of salad? You put peas in my salad. Nuts? You put nuts in my salad? You put your nuts in my salad. Nuts and cock. All of them, you put your 3 piece Set in my sa…..
It dawns on the Ax-man!
Ax: Oh Yeah, that’s right apparently my mute associate here tells me I use to be in a stable at one time quite a successful stable to boot we held quite few titles along the way as well. Until it all went pear shaped! That’s right, that’s what happened to my knee! Criz Cold and Fire-infant. Watch out I’m back and I’m slightly annoyed. You see Cole I hope you win the big one tonight because you and your little wretched hive of scum and villainy are on the very top of my shitlist! Along with econo-save stools. And de-flowering you of that belt and taking what’s rightfully mine will be the greatest pleasure of all time. But really it doesn’t matter who has that belt. I’m heading there, just going through you that’d be a real time saver.
Ax-man makes his way to leave. Turns back and gets back on the mike.
AX: Yeah look I just want to straighten this out, by de-flowering I went 1st world title defence loss, not Anal sex. Alright cool. So no takers on a run in then. Well I’ll just head off then.KZ vs. THE BLACK DAWGS – Taipei Death MatchReferee Sterling Glaw is in the ring for this one, although his only duty will be to declare a winner, which essentially means when someone cannot continue. The bell rings and the teams are announced, but nothing. After a few seconds of waiting, we cut to the back and see that the fight has already begun back stage. Jack and Blackdragon are hammering away on each other and LD Williams has a belt around UD’s throat and is leading him somewhere. For those who don’t know, a Taipei Death Match is this, all four men have their hands taped, then your hands are dipped in glue, then into a bucket of broken glass. Anything goes, the only way to win is to beat your opponent bad enough that he cannot continue. Williams drags UD over to a pile of shipping pallets and sets him up for a pile driver, predictably UD back drops out of it and sends LDW crashing onto the pallets. UD grabs LDW and hammers at his head, drawing blood. Meanwhile Moose and BD are already bloody messes, bleeding heavily from their foreheads, now they are taking turns chopping each other, each chop leaves a bloody gash until their chests are running with blood. The fight works its way to ringside, around the ring, and finally into the ring. At about the twenty minute mark, all four men are actually in the ring, along with tables and chairs and ladders and such. UD choke slams MHJ though a table, but Jack manages to get up. BD tries a swan dive head but, but LDW slams a chair across his head as he falls. The men are moving much slower now, loss of blood has GOT to be taking a toll. Jack rummages under the ring and grabs a bag of nails and throws them into the ring. He climbs in, but is met by UD who blasts him in the face with several light tubes, Jack staggers, then gets choke slammed onto the nails! Jack rolls over and there are nails sticking out of his back. LD Williams pulls BD to his feet and whips him to the ropes and catches him with a belly to belly release suplex that sends BD over the top rope through a table to the floor. UnderDawg climbs to the top rope and is waiting on LDW to turn around, before he can do anything though MHJ falls against the ropes and crotches himself. Jack climbs to the second tope and hits UD wit ha series of heart punches. UD teeters for a moment, then falls off the top to the mat. LDW leaves the ring and pulls BD up from the wreckage and DDT’s him on the floor, then reaches under the ring and pulls out a cinder block. Jack wraps a chain around UD’s throat and drags him to the middle of the ring, LDW slides in and they put the cinder block under UD’s head, then each one grabs a chair DOUBLE CON-CHAIR-TO! It slams UD’s head between steel and cement! The ref stares in disbelief and makes a fairly fast ten count. Jack and Williams both collapse to the mat. This one is mercifully over
WINNERS in 29:47 KZ
Medics rush to the ring and check on the others, but pay most attention to UD who is not moving. They load the big Dog up and start to the back, about halfway up the ramp, UD snaps and starts shoving people and jumps off the stretcher! OH MY GOD!! A bloody KZ stand in the ring, and equally bloody UD and BD stand about halfway up the ramps and just glare at each other. UD’s eyes roll into the back of his head and disappears in a cloud of smoke
DRINK & DESTROY vs. THE CHICKENSHIT HEELS – Ladder Match for the Box o’PromosReferee Mel Creech hooks the Box O'Promos to the wire and it rises toward the ceiling as Van Halen blares over the PA, signaling the arrival of Attitude Adjuster and Johnny Adrenaline. The Chickenshit Heels point and look up at their prized possession, but have to focus on immediate business at hand, because ************* hits, and Stank and Capslock are on their way to the ring. TCH bail to the floor as D&D poses to the crowd, then turn their attention toward their opponents. Johnny and AA talk strategy, and as Stank and Capslock step toward them, TCH split up and run around the ring in opposite directions. Stank chases AA and FFC chases Johnny, and TCH roll back in on the other side of the ring, then run out the other side. So Stank simply grabs a ladder and slides it in, set it up and begins to climb. That draws AA and JA in, and Stank drops Johnny with a right hand, but Capps pulls FFC off the ladder. AA gets a few shots in, but Capslock pounds him back to the corner, then whips him hard into the ladder. Stank beats on Johnny, and gives him an uppercut than sends JA over the top to the floor. D&D takes turns popping Capps with lefts and rights, back and forth to each other like a pinball before sandwiching AA between them. Poetic justice, I guess. JA rolls back in and jumps on Capslock's back, looking for a sleeper, but FFC just snap mares him onto the ladder. Stank pulls Capps up and avalanches him in the corner, and FFC follows with a big boot that sends him to the floor. Stank opens up the ladder, but sets it upside down, legs going upward, and Capslock flapjacks Johnny onto the bracings, causing the ladder to fold up and fall over, Adrenaline trapped inside it. D&D stomp away at the ladder, but get stopped momentarily by AA, who comes in wielding a chair, putting both Stank and Capslock down. Capps frees his partner, and he and Johnny put the boots to Stank. Capps sets the ladder up in the corner, and Johnny whips Capslock into it, and the ladder falls back onto FFC. AA gets the bright idea to slam Stank onto the ladder, with Capslock beneath it, but Capps can't lift the big guy, so Johnny comes over and, together, they suplex Stank onto the ladder and FFC. With both guys down, TCH decide it's time to make a run up the ladder. Only problem is that Stank is laying on the ladder. The Heels can't budge him, so Capps goes to the floor to grab a second ladder. AA brings it back in and sets it up, and Johnny begins to climb, but Stank is up and picks Capps up for a slam, but drives him back first into the ladder, and JA gets crotched on the top rope! Capslock sets up his ladder, but is slow in climbing, and Johnny desperately dives and grabs his foot. FFC kicks him off and Stank tosses him to the floor, but that allows AA to shove the ladder over, sending Capslock to the mat hard. Stank grabs Capps and gives him a belly to belly suplex and decides to make a go at it. But now Johnny comes back in and sets up the other ladder and gives chase. Stank tips the bag with his fingers, but Adrenaline punches him in the gut. JA stays on him and DDT's off the ladder! AA folds up one ladder and drills Capslock with it repeatedly, then pushes Capslock to the floor with his foot. AA sets the ladder on the middle rope, halfway over the floor, out of the way because Johnny's got the other ladder in the corner and is looking for something big. JA eyes Stank on the mat, but FFC was playing possum and sneaks around and pushes the ladder over. Adrenaline flies over the top and onto the ladder hanging off the rope, and the other end seesaws right into AA! D&D sends Capps to the ropes... DUI~! FFC sets the ladder up, and both guys climb. It's academic... but the ladder is the same one Johnny got slammed on earlier in the match, and all the weight causes the braces to give way, and the ladder collapses into twisted metal. Stank looks around in disgust and goes to the floor to grab another ladder, but Johnny slides in from the other side and wallops Capslock with his ladder. Stank and Johnny play dueling ladders, and Stank just decides to charge at Johnny with the ladder and knock him out of the ring. Stank sets the ladder up and climbs, but AA is to his feet and climbs the other side. Slug out on top of the ladder, and AA goes to the eyes. Capps gets one rung higher than Stank and reaches for the bag, but Stank stops that. Capps rams Stank's head off the ladder and slaps on THE CLAW~! But Stank counters into the STANK-U OFF THE LADDER~! The ladder falls onto Stank, but FFC grabs it and sets it up. Capslock climbs, but now Johnny is up and hits a lowbrow on FFC. Johnny climbs up while Capslock sells the nut shot on the other side of the ladder, and JA looks for a suplex or something on Capslock. But FFC blocks and it's time for GREETINGS FROM FRESNO OFF THE LADDER~! But when Capslock goes to bring Adrenaline down, Johnny hooks the wire with his legs to block!! A hanging upside down Johnny punches Capslock off the ladder, and Adrenaline swings back and forth in mid-air, hanging only by his legs wrapped around the wire. Johnny manages to use his leg strength to pull himself up and grab the wire with his hands, but before he can slide down the wire and grab the bag, Stank is up the ladder and CLOBBERS Johnny with the chair! Adrenaline falls fifteen feet to the mat, and Stank has a golden opportunity. But as Stank gets his hands on the bag, AA pushes the ladder over from behind, and Stank lands on the opposite turnbuckle in an awkward bump and falls to the floor. This leaves AA and FFC to race up the ladder. But before Capslock even gets to the second rung, Jesus C. Kidneypuncher and The Boogeyman hit the ring and pull him down. Attitude Adjuster is slowly climbing the ladder reaching for the box o’promos. He is about half way up the ladder and he is….sitting down? Folks Attitude Adjuster is winded, he needs to sit down and rest! Looks like someone needs a few less sandwiches from Ric Flair’s Sandwich Shoppe – Flair’s Sandwich Shoppe, Eat Fresh ALL NIGHT LONG FAT BOY WHOOOOO!! Capslock fights them off and grabs Alan’s leg and tries to pull him off the ladder, Alan is about to fall when the Boogeyman throws his gigantic clock at AA, AA catches it, and smashes it down on Capslock’s head. FFC crumples to the mat and AA grabs the box and falls to the mat to win the match! WINNERS in 28:23: The Chickenshit Heels.
After Capslock disposes of JCK and Boogeyman, he gets his hands on AA. GREETINGS FROM FRESNO~! Then a second one for good measure, then goes to the floor to check on Stank. EMT's hit the ring with stretchers for Adrenaline and Stank, and the crowd gives all four guys a standing ovation
CANADIAN DRAGON vs. THIM REYNOLDS – Finisher MatchReferee Mel Creech is out for this one, the rules are very simple, pin falls or submissions do not matter at all, the first person to hit their finisher, Canadian Dragon’s Canadian Destroyer or Thim Reynolds’ Adjustment are the winners. Both men are announced and this match is under way. The two circle slowly, Thim slowly backs CD into the corner, then attacks, pummeling CD with forearms to the side of the head, CD tries to get his arms up but Thim is relentless and beats CD down in the corner. TR grabs CD’s leg and pulls him to the middle of the ring and tries to roll him over for the adjustment, but CD repeatedly kicks Thim in the face breaking the hold. Still on the mat Dragon kicks at Thim’s knee until Thim falls to one knee. CD gets to his feet and hits the ropes and tries the Canadian Destroyer! But Thim stands up in mid move and is about to reverse it to an Alabama Slam when CD shifts his weight and brings Thim down with a DDT. Both men are on their feet and eye each other warily. The match continues at this pace for the next twenty minutes. Thim comes close several times to locking on the Adjustment, his closest success comes when CD charges at Thim in the corner, TR sidesteps and CD crashes chest first into the corner, Thim pins CD in the corner and begins to apply the Adjustment WHILE CD IS STANDING! But a low kicks frees Dragon and the match continues. The end comes when Thim clotheslines CD over the top rope to the floor, he starts to follow him out when referee Mel Creech stops him. Thim argues with the ref for a second allowing CD to recover, Dragon gets on the apron and as Thim starts to pull him in, nails Thim with a shoulder block to the midsection doubling Thim over. With Thim doubled over, CD appears to set up for a sunset flip into the ring, but instead, CD leaps over the top rope, lands with his feet on the bottom rope and Thim’s head between his legs, and uses the rope to spring over in a CANADIAN DESTROYER!!!! That’s it!
WINNER in 27:09 Canadian Dragon
After the match, CD gets to his feet and Thim levels him with a clothesline to the back of the head. Thim pounces on CD and locks on the Adjustment, grinding it furiously. CD struggles to get out, but cannot, eventually he succumbs to the pain and his body goes limp. Thim finally releases the hold and struggles to his feet holding his neck. Thim makes it about halfway up the ramp before he collapses and needs help making it the rest of the way.
UNCLE ENTITY vs. CONCRETE TG – Onslaught Championship Tournament FinalSterling Glaw is out for this one, this is the finals of the Onslaught Championship Tournament. Uncle Entity is introduced first, he comes out to the jeer of the crowd. His opponent Concrete TG is announced and the place goes nuts. If Concrete wins the title tonight, he will have held every OOWF title except the world title. The two men meet in the center of the ring and Glaw holds the title high for them to see. Being a title match, the ten minute time limit is waived for this. The bell rings and we are under way. Collar and elbow tie up, UE pushes CTG to the ropes, clean break, no UE shoves CTG to the mat. The match starts off pretty evenly, neither man is able to gain much of an advantage. After nearly ten minutes of action the match heats up. CTG whips UE to the corner and tries to follow him in with a flying splash, but UE moves and CTG glances off the top turnbuckle and falls over the top rope to the floor, hitting the back of his head on the ring steps as he falls. Entity leaves the ring and hits a spinning neck breaker on the floor, drawing a warning from the ref. UE rolls him back in and covers, but only gets a two count. Entity softens up Crete’s neck, keeping him trapped in a neck vice for several minutes, finally Crete fights out of it and turns the tables and goes on the offensive. Crete catches entity with a Cement Mixer and covers, but Entity gets a foot on the ropes. Entity gets to his feet and falls back into the corner, Crete charges in and gets a boot to the face. Crete staggers and UE picks him up and sets him on the top rope (facing the crowd) Entity reaches up and lifts CTG for a reverse superplex, then falls straight down SUPER BRAINBUSTER! Uncle Entity covers, and Concrete TG cannot kick out in time!
WINNER in 18:28 and NEW OOWF Onslaught Champion – Uncle Entity
THE DEVIL’S BRIGADE vs. WCW – OOWF World Tag Team Title MatchwCw comes to the ring with a reluctant Missy in tow, Wilder and Westgaard celebrate on the turnbuckles while Missy stands outside the ring and pouts. The Devils come out next, as they get to ring side they notice Missy, Camby and O’Neil head toward her and threaten her with lord knows what. Wilder gets a running start inside the ring and leaps over the top rope and takes both Devils down. Westgaard slips out of the ring as well and pulls Camby to his feet and slams him on the floor, Wilder jumps to the apron and hits a spring board moonsault onto the prone Camby. Meanwhile TO nails JWW from behind with a forearm to the back of the head and rolls him into the ring. All four men make it to their spots, Tommy and JWW are the legal men, TO keeps JWW on the mat, taking turns stomping him and choking him. TO pulls JWW to his feet and tags Camby in, Camby comes in and levels him with a monstrous clothesline. Back and forth action for the whole match, the violence threatens to escalate out of control at any moment, but referee Angel Barros keeps it under control. Finally the end comes when Camby whips Wilder to the ropes, but TW reverses it at the last second, at the same time, TO charges in and KO’s Wilder with a Wicked Left. Missy reaches in and blindly grabs a leg, it happens to be Camby’s! Camby stops and turns and glares at Missy and starts to pull her in by the hair, Missy screams. JWW catches Camby in the back of the head with a high knee while the ref was getting TO out of the ring, then turns the dazed Camby around, scoops him up and hits the ICE AUGER! JWW pulls Tommy over and drapes his arm across Camby’s chest, one, two three!!! NEW CHAMPIONS!
WINNERS in 24:03 and NEW OOWF World Tag Team Champions – wCw!
[Johnny Adrenaline and Attitude Adjuster are being carted out on stretchers, half-conscious. AA, though, is hugging the Box O'Promos to his chest.]
AA: We did it, man.
JA: Yeah...
AA: I'm proud of you, Johnny.
JA: Yeah...
AA: And I don't have to retire.
JA: Yeah...
EMT#2: Nobody buys those retirement angles.
JA: [suddenly pops up on stretcher] HUH? He's not supposed to have a line here!
AA: Johnny, you're breaking kayfabe, man. We're supposed to be half-dead.
JA: My bad. [Johnny falls back out.]
AA: Look man, I know you're just an indy guy looking to get your face on TV, but shut the hell up and let us finish this promo.
[The Boogeyman wanders into the scene as the Heels continue to be carted down the hall.]
BM: I'm the BOOGEYMAN! And I'm coming to get you!
AA: Thanks for the assist, Boog. I knew I let you roll with us for a reason.
[Boogeyman grabs a stethoscope from an EMT and bites the end off it.]
RS: Damn...
AA: You too, Ron.
RF: CUT A PROMO, DAMN IT!
AA: I think I will...
[AA opens the now unlocked box as the EMT's load Adrenaline and Capps into the ambulance. AA now pops off the stretcher.]
AA: WHAT THE FUCK??
JA: [sitting up] What is it?
[AA pulls two bottles of whiskey out of the steel box and tosses the box out of the ambulance.]
AA: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!
[AA goes to hop out of the ambulance, but the door gets slammed in his face, and the vehicle pulls away.]CAPELLAN vs. NILES ANDERSON – OOWF Intercontinental Title MatchOur semi-Main event for the night, Capellan defends his Intercontinental Title against the Specimen Niles Anderson. We get the introductions and referee Sterling Glaw gives each man instructions in the middle of the ring and holds the title up. Both men head to the corner and the ref calls for the bell this one is under way. Collar and elbow lock up to start, Cap grabs an arm wringer, Niles escapes out of it with a straight right to the mouth. Niles drops a knee down on Capellan’s throat and argues with the referee while choking him, getting a few extra seconds before the ref starts the five count. The match goes back and forth several times, and we quickly realize that this is turning into something special. Niles, the crafty veteran, and former world champion, cannot seem to put away the younger Capellan. And to his credit, Capellan not only withstands Niles attacks but keeps him on the defensive for long stretches of the match. The end appears to come at the 45 minute mark when Capellan misses a springboard moonsault when Niles gets his knees up. Niles gets to his feet and PLANTS Capellan with a SteeDDT! One, Two, Thr….Cap gets his foot on the ropes. The action continues, Niles hits a slingshot suplex and floats over for two. Cap keeps kicking out, what does it take to keep this man down. Niles uncharacteristically climbs the ropes and leaps, but Cap gets his foot up catching Niles in the jaw. Both men are down, the referee starts the ten count. Cap pulls himself up using the ropes, and Niles uses the referee to pull himself to his feet. The ref shoves Niles aside and he hits the ropes, Capellan staggers and can’t stand straight, Niles catches him with another SteeDDT in the center of the ring. Both men are down and breathing hard, all Niles has to do is roll over and cover him. Niles slowly gets to his feet, and instead of going for a cover, he pulls Capellan to his feet and scoops him up, as he slams Capellan, Cap grabs Niles in a small package! One, Two Three! Niles kicks out a fraction of a second too late!
WINNER in 47:49 and STILL OOWF Intercontinental Champion - Capellan
HARDBODY HARRIS vs. CHRIS ALT vs. CHRIS COLE – OOWF World Heavyweight Title MatchAlt enters first, then Cole, and the champion, per usual, gets the superstar treatment: light show, Righteous Brothers, you know the deal. Bell sounds, and Cole tells 'em both off, walks out of the ring, and takes a seat by the timekeeper at ringside. Harris and Alt both watch Cole leave the ring, and HH goes to go after him, but Alt jumps him from behind. A re-energized Chris Alt stomps away in the corner. But Hardbody fights back up and punches out. To the ropes and a big backdrop. Then arm drag, arm drag, heptoses, and the champion works an arm bar. Alt to his feet and flips out of the arm bar to one of his own.
Harris with a snap mare takeover, but Alt spins and sweeps the legs out, looking for a Boston Crab. HH manages to kick him off, and cradle him on the rebound, and THAT causes Cole to hop up, slide in, and break up the pin. Cole puts the boots to HH, but when Alt gets to his feet, they slug it out. Alt gets the upper hand and sends CC to the ropes. Picture perfect dropkick sends Cole back to the floor, but when CA turns around, Hardbody BOXES THE EARS~! Inverted atomic drop and a clothesline. Baseball slide for Cole, and Harris goes up top. Decision time for the champion, as both guys are getting to their feet, and HH flies to the floor and nails Cole with the #1 DOUBLE AXEHANDLE IN THE OOWF~! Harris kisses a girl in the front row, possibly discovers the cure for cancer before Alt somersaults over the top with a plancha onto the champion. Alt to his feet first, and he goes back to laying a beating in on Cole. Senior official Sterling Glaw is doing his best to maintain a sense of order and wants the fight back into the ring. Alt tells Glaw off and goes back to kicking the crap out of CC. Some double team work by the BFF~! And finally CA tosses Cole into the ring. Lemonade time for the champion and the best man at the champion's future wedding, and Harris and Alt toast to kicking Cole's ass. Back in, and Hardbody goes first, peppering CC with lefts and rights. Alt then steps in and gets ten punches in from the middle turnbuckle, and HH hits Cole with a running elbow. Double superplex, but Harris pulls Alt off upon making a cover. Alt shoves the champion, Harris shoves back, and another chain wrestling sequence ensues, neither man gaining an advantage. HH looks for a fireman's carry takeover, but Cole is up and stiffs him with a kick right to the mouth, and Alt falls out of the ring. Cole chokes HH with the bottom rope, then hotshots him onto the top rope. Irish whip, and Cole sidesteps Harris, and the champion collides with Alt, sending CA sailing to the guardrail. Inverted suplex by CC, and Cole drops some knees. Cole goes to a surfboard, but Hardbody fights to his feet, and Cole smoothly segues into a sleeper. But Alt recovers and slaps a sleeper on Cole! Doing his best to fight it, Harris tries to grab the ref and put a sleeper on him. However, Alt charges toward the corner, and Sterling Glaw gets avalanched between everybody, and bodies go everywhere. Cole
stumbles up and walks into Alt, who looks for Spinal Contusion. CC blocks and looks for a double arm DDT, but Alt counters and hits SPINAL CONTUSION~! Cover, but there's no ref. Alt goes to stir the ref, but when he does, Hardbody moves right in with the BG MEMORIAL/KIP JAMES FACEPLANT~! Now HH has to revive the ref, and Cole's back up and clips Harris HARD in the left knee! Cole picks up HH for a side suplex, but grabs the knee and drives it into the turnbuckle. Cole ties HH's leg up in the ropes and undoes the turnbuckle pad. CC kicks the hell out of Hardbody's knee, but Alt's over to break it up. Cole tries to ram Alt's head into the exposed turnbuckle, but CA blocks. Cole then blocks and elbows out. Alt looks for a butterfly suplex, but Cole blocks that, so Alt opts for a pancake instead. CA looks at the tied up champion, then down at Cole, and decides to stay on the offense, leaving Hardbody tangled up. Alt with an Irish whip, but Cole reverses and picks Alt up for a spine buster, but instead, drops him face first onto the exposed steel rod of the turnbuckle. Alt is immediately bleeding everywhere. The referee is finally awake again and attempts to untie Harris from the ropes, but Cole drags him away, wanting a cover on Alt. 1, 2... but Alt gets a shoulder up. So what's Cole do? He sends Alt to the turnbuckle AGAIN! CC mounts Alt and punches away, opening up the gruesome gash even further. Glaw finally gets Harris free, and HH hobbles over and gets Cole off of Alt. The champion ducks a punch and hits Cole with the ONE AND ONLY~! Cover... 1, 2... and Cole kicks out. Cole with some punches, but Harris stops that with the eye poke! TO BE EDITED IN LATER~! But Hardbody's leg gives out at the apex of the devastating maneuver, and Cole lands on top of him. CC immediately slaps on the TEXAS CLOVERLEAF~! Harris is in BIG trouble, as he doesn't have the strength to get to the ropes. Glaw asks him, but the champion refuses to submit. Cole cinches it in, and Hardbody is fading. Glaw checks the hand once. No response. Twice. No response. A third and we have a new champion. But before the ref can check Harris a third time, Alt comes over with his last bit of strength and breaks the Cloverleaf. CA, just covered in blood now, gets his second wind and opens up on Cole in the corner, but Cole kicks him low. HEADLINER~! but Alt spins out and dumps Cole to the floor. CA looks down at Cole on the floor, then turns his attention back to an unconscious Harris... and Alt covers Hardbody! One... we have a new champion... two... NOT THIS WAY... and Cole pulls the official out of the ring! Alt pulls Cole onto the apron by his hair and decks him. CA covers Harris again. One... two... but HARDBODY HARRIS KICKS OUT! Alt can't believe it, but then refocuses and realizes he's got to finish the job. Alt pulls Harris to his feet and looks for Spinal Contusion, but on instinct, Harris counters directly into TO BE EDITED IN LATER~! And he gets all of it! But Harris can't even pull himself over to
cover, so Cole, with Alt's blood all over him, slithers in and makes the cover on Alt himself. One, two, and Harris musters up the energy to push Cole off. Cole grabs HH and hits a delayed suplex, and then hits a running knee on Alt that sends CA thru the ropes and to the floor. Cole follows out, but Alt throws a cup of lemonade in his eyes! SPINAL CONTUSION ON THE FLOOR?? No! Cole goes low and sends Alt THROUGH THE ANNOUNCE TABLE with a side suplex! Cole flips over the lemonade table and goes back in to finish off Hardbody, who's still fighting on one leg. Harris has managed to get to his feet and Cole steps in. CC charges, but HH sidesteps him, and Cole goes headfirst off the exposed steel rod! CC falls to the mat, and now he's bleeding. Harris with the cover... 1...2... and Cole gets a shoulder up! Hardbody pulls Cole up and wants to end it. The champion motions for TO BE EDITED IN LATER, but Cole sweeps the legs out and goes to lock on the TEXAS CLOVERLEAF~! But HH cradles him out of nowhere! One... two... and Cole kicks out again as the crowd was positive that was the finish! Cole pops up and has had enough. He pulls Harris up and grabs him for the HEADLINER~! Cole walks around the ring to show everyone that we're about to have a new champion, but he walks a little too close to the ropes, as Alt reaches in and pulls Cole's leg from beneath him. Hardbody lands on top, and grabs a handful of tights! One... two... and Sterling Glaw counts three a split second before Alt can re-enter the ring to make the save!
WINNER in 43:50 and STILL OOWF WORLD CHAMPION: HARDBODY HARRIS
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