(Part 2)
BEST OF THE OOWF: March 28, 2005, MADNESS PPV
UNDERDAWG vs. CANADIAN DRAGON – Ultimate Hell match The Ultimate Hell match will take place inside a steal cage. Surrounding that cage is a Hell In a cell cage with opening on each side of the roof. On top of that cage, is another cage, this time with no ceiling. Instead, two steel scaffolds run through the cage, forming an X. Suspended from that X is OOWF Championship belt.
Dawg and Dragon do a stare down to start, and UnderDawg gives CD a slap that spins him around...but CD keeps spinning and hits a wicked spinning dragon kick and it looks like UD has been opened up the hard way. Dawg looks pissed and tosses Dragon through the first cage! On the outside UnderDawg with some stiffs shots to Dragon, and his white mask is starting to turn red as well. UnderDawg picks up Dragon and rams him face first into the outside cage! The crowd seems to like that so he does it again. UnderDawg repeats again as the crowd counts along. After the tenth time Dragon looks dead against the cage. UnderDawg charges at Dragon, but he hits a drop toehold into the cage.
Dragon suplexes UnderDawg on the floor, but Dawg flips out of that and Dragon gets raked on the UNFORGIVING STEEL MESH OF DEATH and bleeds. The front of Dragon's mask is pretty much torn off after that. Choke slam to the floor and UD starts to climb but Dragon pulls him back down. Dawg just shrugs him off and goes to climb again, but CD nails him with a steal chair.
Dragon keeps up with the chair shots and the crowd is counting along again. Dragon looks under the ring and finds a case of Molson Canadian. He opens a bottle up and drinks about half the beer before breaking the bottle over UnderDawg's head! The crowd pops huge for that and Canadian Dragon repeats the process again. CD takes a little too long for the third attempt though, as UD blocks and smashes the bottle over Dragons head. UnderDawg takes the opening as Dragon stumbles and manages to scale the cage to the 2nd level. He goes for the ladder as Dragon climbs the cage. UnderDawg looks to be going for the belt, but decides to use the ladder as a battering ram on Dragon. Dragon ducks and manages to get a reverse DDT on UnderDawg. Dragon goes for a hurricaranna, but UD blocks it, pulling Dragon back up and delivering an alley-up lifting Dragons head into the scaffold. UD grabs a ladder and goes for the belt. Dragon up the other side and it's a slugfest on the top. Finally Dragon manages to block a blow, and goes for another hurricarana...and this one hits sending both men crashing to the top of the first cage.
UD up first, so he whoops Dragon's ass for a bit, and then whoops Dragon's ass some more. UD hits a choke slam and looks kinds shocked that the roof of the cell didn't give way. He goes for another choke slam, but gets his foot caught in the cage and Dragon hits a modified diamond cutter out of nowhere. Dragon picks up UD and hits a pile driver. The crowd asks for one more, so Dragon grants their wish. Dragon goes for another pile driver but gets back dropped. UD has his footing now and hits the flying clothesline. Both men have chairs now and go swing for the fences, but just send each other to opposite sides of the cage, practically landing on ladder. Both men seem to have the same idea, and then grab the ladders and climb up on top of the scaffolding, and UnderDwag is up slowly after him. UnderDwag with more stiff blows to Dragons head as they head toward the center of the X. CD ducks a punch and locks on the Dragon Sleeper! UnderDawg is down on one knee and looks to be fading! He reaches down and grabs for the OOWF title and Dragon pulls him back up. While doing so, Dragons footing slips and he releases the hold. UD sees the opening and locks on a choke lock. UD with an evil look in his eye and lifts CD up and tosses him from the X through the opening in the cell to the ring! The entire ring gives as Dragon goes crashing through it! UnderDawg kneels down on one knee and reaches through the scaffolding and retrieves the OOWF title belt at 45:07.
WINNER in 45: 07 UnderDawg
OOWF official are working frantically on the lock on the cage to get to Dragon. UnderDawg looks down at the carnage he has created and slowly climbs down the side of the cell. His music plays as they show a replay of Dragon going through the ring and it falling apart on impact. The camera closes in on UnderDawg's face as he looks at the ring. All of a sudden there's a roar from the crowd as Canadian Dragon is back on his feet! UnderDawg grins as he holds up the OOWF title, then in and odd moment, drops to one knee and raise the belt up. Dragon drops to a knee as well and takes up a similar pose.
<SFJ7 catches up with Jim Jones outside the arena>
SFJ7: MR. Jones, what are your thoughts on the suspensions?
Jim Jones: I'd just like to say that first off - this is not what wrestling is about. There is too much talking and not enough action - I'm a WRESTLER not a soap star! Secondly - if I am to talk I seriously object to the fact that it's not a serious promoter (like Sean Mooney or Jim Cornette) who's doing the interviewing - I mean geez, even Eric Bischoff would have done - I mean WHO are you? Did you make your name promoting in the mid-south??? Can you remember when Jerry Lawler was the biggest name alive? No?? NO!!?? Get out of my face.BEST OF THE OOWF: July 31, 2005, Territorial Beatings PPV
HARDBODY HARRIS vs. BEAST – Soul Match The OOWF announcer is out to announce the next match. “The following is the OOWF SUPERIOR WRESTLER Championship Trophy Superior Wrestling Challenge. The rules of this match are simple: there are no disqualifications, count outs, or submissions. Falls count anywhere! The wrestler who pins his opponent will always and forever be inscribed as the SUPERIOR WRESTLER in the record book, the OOWF hall of fame, numerous press releases, official archives, the Smithsonian Museum of Contemporary American History, a time capsule to be buried on the moon, a TNT Original Drama (most likely played by Dean Cain), SUPERIOR the Ty Beanie Baby, and most importantly, on this giant 50-foot trophy that will be a permanent fixture to the OOWF staging area.”
*With this, the SUPERIOR WRESTLER trophy is again revealed, looming over once side of the entrance ramp, casting an astonishing but foreboding shadow over stage left. The plastic, gold-painted spiral pillars gleam in the arena lights, and the block letters in the words “SUPERIOR WRESTLER” on the second level of the trophy glitter with the force of the 16 bowling-ball sized rhinestones encrusted on each letter.. It is truly worthy of being the 10th Wonder of the World.*
*Beast’s music hits first, and the crowd isn’t sure whether to boo or cheer. He walks down the entrance ramp, eyeing the trophy with a certain kind of lust and admiration. When he gets to the ring, a nice camera shot of his “Hardbody Harris is the SUPERIOR WRESTLER” tattoo as he paces and looks at the words “SUPERIOR WRESTLER” on the trophy frames everything perfectly. Hardbody Harris is out next, also to a mixed reaction. His legs seem remarkably fine since being broken last week, but Harris’ gaze at the trophy is also unbroken. He licks his lips, still looking and yearning for the title of SUPERIOR WRESTLER with his newfound beastly look. The only thing that draws both wrestlers’ attention away from the trophy is the sound of the bell. The match...IS...ON!*
Hardbody and Beast circle the ring to start. Each man is wary of getting too close. The crowd is anxious for this to really get going. A lunge in by Beast is avoided by Hardbody. A Hardbody lunge is dodged. Still no contact yet. Finally, Hardbody charges but falls right to the ground, grabbing his ankle in pain. Beast walks over in curiously, and as he stands over Hardbody, HH reaches up, grabs Beast and pulls him down on top of him. Harris’ shoulders are down, ref counts 1,2, Beast gets up! Now the game is clear. Beast kicks Harris in the ribs and small packages himself so that Harris is on top, two count. Harris goes for the vertical suplex, but purposely drops Beast on top of him. Two count. Beast intentionally loses a backslide, but Harris reverses it to a self-compromising inside cradle. Two count again. This is one strange affair. Beast causes Harris to roll him up, then Beast grabs his own tights for leverage, but Harris is able to separate. Both men are desperately trying to lose this match. One more attempt at failed sunset flip gets 2 ½, but Beast fights his way and pulls HH’s shoulders up. Both men are breathing heavily, and the crowd gives a nice round of applause for this strange series of chain wrestling. Both men weigh new tactics.
Suddenly, Hardbody sprints and hits Beast with a stiff looking clothesline. He pounds on him with a few stomps, then absolutely crushes him with a spine buster. A few more stomps and a second spine buster and Beast looks a bit out of it. Harris lies down and places Beast’s hand on top of his chest, 1, 2, Beast lifts his hand! Count broken. Beast groggily to his feet and reverses a Hardbody kick into a T-Bone suplex. Hardbody rolls into the corner of the ring, and Beast charges with a stiff knee that snaps Hardbody’s neck back. Beast pulls Hardbody up, hits a few forearm shots, and lifts HH up to the top turnbuckle. Beast tries to slug back, but an uppercut stops that. Beast places Hardbody between his legs, jumps back, and delivers an absolutely crushing top rope power bomb! Hardbody has to be dead. Beast takes his time to get over there, lies down, and slowly pulls Hardbody on top of him. 1, 2, HARDBODY KICKS UP! Nothing seems to be working for both men. Hardbody powders out, and Beast follows him. Beast grabs a chair, while Hardbody grabs the television cables. Beast swings the chair, Hardbody ducks, and starts chocking Beast. The cord is wrapped tight around the neck, and Beast is getting pale. Falls count anywhere, so Hardbody pulls Beast back on top of him, still throttling the big man, and the ref counts again. 1, 2, Beast rolls over, breaking the count! Hardbody is furious; let’s go of the cord, and throws Beast back in the ring. He grabs the chair and waits for Beast to get up. A swing and a miss, Beast kicks Hardbody in the gut, grabs the chair, and KABONGS Hardbody across the skull. Beast, still a bit out of breath, lifts Hardbody’s legs and puts them on the middle rope, then slides underneath. Hardbody unknowingly has the leverage. 1, 2, HEGOTHIMNOHEDIDN’T! Crowd is gasping, but not as much as the two wrestlers.
Beast and Hardbody both get up, and Beast clotheslines Hardbody out of the ring. He follows him out, and the two brawl up the entrance ramp, slamming heads into guardrails and connecting with vicious punches. On stage, the two take turns whipping each other with all sorts of objects, but neither man goes down. They trade punches until they are right next to the giant 50-foot trophy! For once, someone gets hit INTO a trophy, and Hardbody is bleeding. Beast attempts to slingshot Hardbody into one of the plastic pillars and succeeds, but Hardbody latches onto it and starts climbing up the spiral column! Beast frantically chases Hardbody up the trophy, and the cameraman and referee follow. The climb is surprisingly easy, and soon Hardbody and Beast are slugging away on top of the tall platform, the words “SUPERIOR WRESTLER” in their rhinestone lustrous ness glistening behind them. That would make a nice picture. More importantly, four men are 50-FEET IN THE AIR and are steps away from taking a final dive. An uppercut by Hardbody sends Beast perilously close to the edge, his heels hanging over the abyss. He comes back and hits a kick of his own, slamming Hardbody into the “S” in WRESTLER. He tries it again, but Hardbody athletically bounds off the letter and turns it into a flying Jalapeño. Beast ducks, and Hardbody hits the cameraman, who falls backwards into the referee! THE CAMERAMAN AND THE REFEREE ARE FALLING FROM THE 50-FOOT HIGH TROPHY! The two OOWF employees fall through a stack of tables and wires and look dead. They aren’t moving at all, and the crowd is silent. Hardbody and Beast look at each, and look back down. Suddenly, Beast charges at Hardbody and attempts to push Beast off the edge, Beast is barely keeping his balance, Hardbody rushes again, Beast grabs his arms and OH FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS HOLY BEAST AND HARDBODY ARE PLUMMETING TO THE GROUND FROM THE 50-FOOT TROPHY! The crowd is absolutely silent as Beast and Hardbody twirl to their doom. The impact of the fall will be remembered forever, it being so loud it caused the OOWFTron to crack. Devastating. The cameraman, the referee, Hardbody Harris, and Beast have to be dead. A second cameraman is on the scene, checking the four individuals out as the medics take over. The emergency crew huddle over the four broken bodies. Then one, then another, then finally all the medics scream and run away from the carnage. An eerie light is shining from the twisted corpses. What’s this...a shape from Hardbody? Beast’s soul arises from Hardbody Harris! The crowd gasps at the realization. But wait a minute...Hardbody’s soul comes out of Beast! This explains everything! But before the crowd can completely cheer at the truth, HOLY SHIT THE SPIRITS OF HARDBODY AND BEAST ARE ASCENDING INTO THE SKY PUNCHING EACH OTHER! And Beast is also poking Harris’s eyes, which is still just wrong even in the afterlife.
These two men clearly will not let death get in the way of their hatred and quest to be the SUPERIOR WRESTLER, living or no. The ghost-wrestlers leave eerie trails behind them as they float through the arena, landing haunting blows to one another. In mid-air, the ghost of Hardbody flies and delivers a shoulder block to Ghost-Beast, sending him tumbling across the way. Ghost-Hardbody signals the crowd and sends a haunting, “THE #1 FACE IN THE OOWF IS BACK!” booming through the arena. As his back is turned, Ghost-Beast comes hurtling in and clobbers G-H in the back of the head with a BIG MONSTER HAMMER CLUB O’DEATH, afterlife edition. What’s this? He covers him midair? Everyone is confused until GHOST REFEREE hurtles up and checks to see if G-H’s shoulders are flat on the astral plane. They are. Ghost count 1, 2, Hardbody floats out! Looks like falls truly count anywhere. Hardbody and Beast descend down toward the ring and start fighting a few inches above the mat. Arm drag by Hardbody causes no impact, and Beast floats unharmed. Beast Irish whips Hardbody, but Hardbody phases through the ropes and starts floating to the roof of the arena. Ghost-Beast gives chase, as does ghost referee. A few punches are thrown before all three apparitions pass right through the roof and are gone. Nobody knows what will happen until all eyes are the site of the two falls. For the first time in history, 20,000 people chant for “CAM-RA MAN! CAM-RA MAN! CAMRA-MAN!” And, in response to the earthly request, a light gleams and GHOST CAMERAMAN with GHOST CAMERA follow the action into space!
When he finally catches up, Beast and Hardbody are tumbling through the evening sky. A plane flies right into them, and Hardbody and Beast fight among several hundred passengers. The pilot turns on the No-Smoking sign, but the ecto-trails off the wrestlers cannot be extinguished. Beast attempts to ram Hardbody into the bathroom stall, but forgets they’re both ghosts and everyone just passes through. Hardbody takes advantage of the situation and suplexes ghost-beast onto a cloud. It’s the most comfortable move ever. Back in the arena and on television sets around the world, the crowd is witnessing the GREATEST THING EVER. Well, they would be, except Beast has Hardbody in a chin lock on top of the cloud for a good two minutes. The fickle OOWF audience chants “BOR-ING” until they start to see Hardbody fire back up. He rises to his feet, hits two elbows, and is a SPIRIT OF FIRE as he clocks Beast multiple times. Beast is juicing a white ghost blood. He picks Beast up, who hits the most unearthly low blow ever, and Hardbody slowly falls back to earth. Beast, though, is unhappy with this speed, puts Hardbody between his legs, and they hurtle back down to the arena in a DESCEND-DOWN POWERBOMB. The fall is nauseating as the cameraman tries his best to follow the action back down to the arena. Hardbody and Beast zoom through the sky right into the carnage of bodies and broken stuff from before. The crowd is happy now, chanting “OH OH DUB EF! OH OH DUB EF!” Coincidentally Hardbody’s spirit goes back in the proper body, as does Beast’s. Could this ordeal finally be over? The ref and cameraman shrug and both of them float back into their bodies. Nothing happens for a minute, and the crowd wonders if everything is over.
In less than ten seconds, though, there’s some slight movement. Beast’s arm twitches, and Hardbody starts blinking his eyes. THEY’RE ALIVE! THEY’RE ALIVE! The movements become quicker, and eventually both Beast and Hardbody are able to leverage themselves to their feet. Refs and cameramen are much bigger wussies, though, so it will be another minute before they get up. Understandably groggy, Beast and Hardbody don’t even see each other as they stumble around back onto the stage. Plus they’re bleeding like hell. Beast regains his composure first, though, noticing the SUPERIOR WRESTLER trophy and then noticing that he is in his own Beastly body again. He charges Hardbody, who is still getting used to being back in his own frame and is almost speared right out of it. A series of punches drives Hardbody back to the ring, and Beast throws HH into the stairs. Beast rolls Hardbody into the ring climbs in, and hits a tilt-a-whirl slam. He goes for the cover, but the ref has just finally made his way to his feet and is staggering back to the ring. In the meantime, he tries to go for an elbow drop off the middle rope, but Hardbody dodges it. Back body drop on Beast by Harris, who then climbs the top rope and hits the #1 DOUBLE AXE-HANDLE IN THE OOWF! Beast is down, and Hardbody picks him up. He goes for the TO BE EDITED IN LATER, but Beast avoids it and tries for an earthly BIG HAMMER MONSTER CLUB O’DEATH, but that’s ducked by Hardbody, who finally hits THE TO BE EDITED IN LATER! An exasperated Hardbody falls arms spread out, on top of Beast, and crowd chants along as the ref slides into the ring and counts. 1.......2........3! After months we finally have a SUPERIOR WRESTLER! WINNER IN 1:06:06 (Get it...66.06?) HARDBODY HARRIS
*After the match, Hardbody stumbles out of the ring to a wondrous ovation. He makes it to the 50-foot trophy and leans on it as his music plays. Beast sits in the corner of the ring with his eyes closed, unable to watch. A brilliant shot of Hardbody Harris and the SUPERIOR WRESTLER trophy shooting a spectacular pyro display puts closure on the feud that has transcended Heaven, Earth, Reality, and Common Sense.*
<Thim is backstage in the Gorilla position whispering into a camera>
TR: well here we are guys, you've spoken, you've voted and you've decided that this next pair of chumpstains suck the hardest - you'll find out who in a minute. I'm gonna let them get things going and then they've had it.
tR: had what Thim?
TR: woah! theRick!! How you doing?
tR: I'm fine Thim. You busy?
TR: erm, no, not really
tR: you get a pretty good view off the action from back here don't you?
TR: yea, really - and you've gotta admire these old guys
tR: they're not so old, they've still got what it takes
TR: actually I'm surprised that some of them have still got what it takes to walk to the ring in one go! I mean come on theRick . . . you're not seriously going to force the fans to endure this snoozefest all night are you
tR: bet your ass I am!! Have you seen the reaction they're getting out there
TR: yea but come on
tR: no dice Thim
TR: hmmmm, we'll see
tR: no Thim we WON'T . . . I saw your little broadcast earlier . . . I know exactly why you're here and I just wanted to let you know that I think it would be a very bad idea for your career here in the OOWF
TR: I have no idea what you're talking about theRick?
tR: well let's just leave it like this shall we . . . not only do you not have an official match tonight but if I see or even hear from anyone that you have so much as entered the arena tonight, put so much as a hand through these curtains tonight I will fine you your entire years wages and suspend you for 12 months without pay . . .
TR: screw you theRick, I'll just go and work somewhere else
tR: with the sort of no-compete contract that's part of the deals here, that'll end up costing you twice a much. Have a great evening Thim and enjoy the showMeanwhile…
<SFJ#494 spots CTG among the protesters>
SFJ494: Concrete, as one of OOWF's most respected stars, it's strange that you'd be out here protesting.
CTG: I thought this was necessary - I'm out here on behalf of senior referee Sterling Glaw, who made the right call when Chris Alt - the "Alternater" - decided to draw a DQ when his partner in crime Chris Cole was about to tap out to Sriram. Cole had been outwrestled in a hard-fought match, he had nothing to be ashamed of, but Alt's interference ruined an otherwise excellent main event.
SFJ494: you realize you were one of the first people out there, it could be said you STARTED the riot.
CTG: 
SFJ494: (Clocks Crete with the microphone) that's for calling me SKANK!
(OMGWTF SFJ494 IS SPICE!! Sugar comes in from another direction and they start beating on Concrete, shrieking and calling him names)LI, GRUNT, ENDO & MORTE vs. RIC FLAIR, ABDULLAH THE BUTCHER, RON SIMMONS & REPO MANThis one is not going to be pretty. The Establishment come to the ring to heave boos, the fans are not quite sure what to make of the Chickenshit Heel Posse, they cheer Flair and Ron Simmons, boo Abby, and seem to be curious about Repo. TCHP hit the ring and the fight is immediately on, Abby and Grunt, the two big men square off. Grunt tries to cave in Abby’s chest with open hand slaps, Abby grabs Grunt’s arm and attacks it with a fork. LI and Ron Simmons face off, LI hits the Karate Kid Crane kick pose, but Simmons finishes his beer, tosses the bottle aside and clotheslines Li damn near out of his boots. Repo man has Morte on the mat and he is trying his best to pull Morte’s mask off, Morte is fighting with all he has. Ric Flair and Endo square off in the middle of the ring, Endo gets the better of Flair with a couple of shots to the jaw, but Flair pokes Endo in the eyes, spins him into the corner and blisters him with chops, WHOOO WHOOOOO WHOOOOOO! The Establishment has had enough Grunt pie faces Abby and escapes from the ring, LI struggles, but finally pulls a packet of salt out of his tights and tosses it in Simmons face, Morte nails a low blow on Repo and escapes to the outside. That leaves Endo against the rest of the TCHP, Flair whips him out of the corner right into a Ron Simmons spine buster, followed by a mammoth elbow drop from Abby. I guess the referee is going to start the match here, Endo and Abby are the legal men in the match. Abby pulls Endo to his feet, backs him into the corner and attacks him with a pencil, gouging open Endo’s forehead. Ric Flair calls for the tag, Abby tags him in, Ric comes in and measures Endo and gets a few jabs in. Ric tries to whip Endo across the ring, but Endo reverses it and Flair hits the corner, flips up over the top rope and lands on the wrong apron, he runs down the apron right into a big boot from Grunt and falls to the floor face first. Flair yells in pain OH GOD! and comes up wearing a crimson mask. Uh, ok. The Establishment leaps off the apron and attack while Endo distracts the referee. Grunt holds Flair and Morte nails Ric with a spin kick to the jaw, when Grunt lets go, LI nails Flair with a super kick. Grunt pulls Flair up, military presses him and throws him over the top rope into the ring. Endo covers, but Repo comes in and makes the save, and folks, this is where the match breaks down. All eight men meet in the center of the ring and the fight is on, Abby clotheslines Morte over the top rope, but he holds on and skins the cat, Abby catches him and whips him right into the waiting arms of Ron Simmons. Don lifts Morte for a Dominator, but something goes wrong and Morte gets dropped on his head! Morte is out! In the haze of the arena, we see The other men fighting, and Abby standing over a fallen Morte. Abby gets an evil look on his face and heads to the corner, what the ? ABDULLAH THE BUTCHER CLIMBS THE ROPES! He stands perched on the top rope, all 350+ pounds of Sudanese Mad Man! MOON SAULT!!! OH MY GOD!!!! MORTE IS DEAD!!!! The crowd is ouch, ouch, ouch, ouch, ouch Morte comes to and Abby is standing over him jabbing him with a fork, it was all a dream! Like Newhart! Well except the sweater puppies, THOSE were real! Grunt charges across the ring and clotheslines him and Abby over the rope and they brawl on the floor, and are soon both covered in blood. Ron Simmons pulls Morte to his feet, and tries a power bomb, but Morte holds on and takes them both over the ropes to the floor. Repo man and Endo are fighting in another part of the ring, Repo hits the ropes, but Endo lowers his head a second too soon and eats a Repo swinging neck breaker. Endo slides under the bottom rope and Repo follows. Now that the brawl has moved out of the ring, we see LI has Flair on his knees pounding him bloody. When the referee is not looking, Flair low blows LI. As LI falls to the mat in pain, Flair grabs his leg and locks on the figure four, WHOOOO! LI tries to make it to the ropes but cannot, and is forced to tap out.
WINNERS in 23:16 Ric Flair, Abdullah the Butcher, Ron Simmons and Repo Man
SFJ7 catches up with The Devil’s Brigade>
SFJ7: What are your thoughts on the Legend’s Night?
TO: Ul nuk eny o dos Nancey Booys oot wit me lef’ ‘ook
HC: Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god.
TO: Yo okey ‘arpa?
HC: No man I’m not ok. The GM suspended us WITHOUT PAY! How am I going to pay my nutritionist this week? YOU KNOW I CAN’T MISS A CYCLE TOMMY!!!
TO: Don’ worry. Ay gut a plen. I broot sum screps frum al da shet we bloowd up. We gunna sell dem.
HC: Sell autographed pieces of carnage? That just might work.BEST OF THE OOWF: December 11, 2004, Holiday Hell PPV
DONOVAN VIPER vs. UNDERDAWG v. MICROPLAY Triple Threat Inferno Casket Match for the OOWF world title At the top of the ramp, off to one side there is a flaming fire pit, to win the match, you have to put your opponent in one of the three caskets, and push it into the flames. It is obvious Viper is not 100% Micro targets him early, and UD is forced to save his Ministry running mate on more than one occasion. Since there are no pin falls the wrestlers just batter each other silly. Viper nails Micro with a sidewinder and UD grabs micro and they leave the ring. UD drags Micro to the top of the ramp where the caskets and fire pit wait. Micro frees himself from UD, grabs a chair and takes out UD with a shot to the head, UD falls off the stage, Viper stalks Micro and when he turns around he nails him with a chain wrapped Elbow of Death and dumps his limp body into the casket. He is pushing Micro towards the pit, and the victory and world title, when Beast comes out and clotheslines Viper, the casket falls and spills open, micro is able to escape. Viper and Beast battle to the back. UD gets back up on the stage grabs the recovering Micro and fireplug pile drives him. UD tosses him into the second casket. He is wheeling it toward the fire when Viper stumbles out of the back, a bloody mess and stumbles into the casket knocking it over and once again freeing Micro. UD and Viper stare at each other. Beast attacks Viper from behind, again, sending him crashing into UD, Viper and Beast brawl again, with UD stunned, Micro low blows UD and pushes him into the final remaining casket, slams the lid, and uses the last of his strength to push it off the stage into the fire pit. Viper sees what happened and stares in disbelief until Beast crushes him with another club o’ death.
WINNER in 29:22 and Still OOWF World Champion – Microplay
Camera focuses on the blazing pit and officials scurrying around it with fire extinguishers trying to douse the flames. As the camera fades to black we hear people yelling, where’s the body? He’s not there? What the fuc……..
BEST OF THE OOWF: April 13, 2005, MidWeek Mayhem
ATTITUDE ADJUSTER vs. JOHNNY ADRENALINE – Country Club Death Match for the OOWF Intercontinental Title Attitude Adjuster vs. Johnny Adrenaline for the OOWF Intercontinental Title; Country Club Death Match (Last Man Standing Rules - Any and all golf equipment is legal to use)
The mat is green, there are flagsticks mounted on each ring post, and a fully stocked golf bag sits outside the ring, propped up to each ring post. "Right Now" blares over the PA and Attitude Adjuster makes his way to the ring, accompanied by John Daly, carrying a golf bag. He sets the bag by the timekeeper; AA examines the flagsticks momentarily, and steps into the ring. Then "The Unforgiven" hits, and Johnny Adrenaline comes thru the curtain riding in a golf cart being driven by a pretty young lady dressed as a sexy caddy. She parks the cart at the end of the aisle, Johnny grabs his own bag, and the girl leaves. Johnny sets his bag by the aisle and calmly gets into the ring. The two men go face to face before the referee steps between them. The ref checks AA for foreign objects, and finds a roll of quarters stashed away in his boot. As the ref warns AA about it, the challenger just rolls his eyes and JA laughs at him. As Johnny takes his belt off, the ref checks him over, and ALSO finds something: a pair of brass knuckles in his waistband. JA is furious and AA gets a laugh this time. The ref holds the IC Title in the air for all to see and the bell rings to start the match.
The two men get up in each other's grills and exchange pleasantries. JA starts the fun with a hard slap across AA's face. AA steps back and laughs it off and retaliates with a stiff right hand to JA's jaw, sending the champ to the mat. JA slowly gets up, holding his mouth, and AA sends him down again. This time, JA crawls to the corner, gets fed up and rolls outside, grabbing a club out of one of the bags. JA comes in and takes a wild swing, missing badly. AA kicks JA and picks the club up. JA bails out and yells at AA. AA tosses the club to the floor and invites JA back in, who obliges. They lock up and AA gets an arm drag, then another. JA blocks a third with a hip toss, and takes down AA with a headlock takeover. AA kips out of it and grabs a front face lock and JA goes to the ropes to break. Both guys exchange words again and they trade punches, with AA getting the upper hand. Irish whip and clothesline for AA. JA charges and AA backdrops him over the top, but JA lands on the apron. JA gets a shoulder to AA's midsection and tries to suplex him to the floor, but AA counters by snapping JA's neck off the top rope, sending the champion to the floor. AA goes up top, grabs the flagstick and poses to the crowd to a mixed reaction, and hits JA with a double axe handle on the floor. AA then goes over and unstraps the flagstick from its post and goes after Johnny with it. But JA grabs the nearest golf bag and heaves it at AA, knocking the flagstick to the floor and sending golf clubs scattering. JA grabs the flagstick and slides it between the ropes and gets it partially into the ring. JA rolls in and goes to pick it up, but AA grabs the other end and seesaws it right back into JA's face. The ref starts to count JA out as AA rolls back in, and JA is up at five. AA takes the flagstick and nails JA in the gut one time with it, but Johnny knocks it out of his hand with a standing dropkick. JA takes the flagstick and pounds on AA with it. JA lays it across the ropes in the opposite corner, pulls AA up and whips him into it, sending the stick to the floor. JA dumps AA over the top and asks for a count.
As the ref counts, JA goes to the other side of the ring and grabs a club out of a bag. AA is up at four and JA comes around the corner and blasts AA across the back with the shaft of the club. A few more shots around the ring and the club is twisted. AA grabs the bag he brought down and blocks JA's swing and kicks JA low, and both men fall to the floor. The ref begins to count and AA unzips on of the pockets and grabs something. Both guys are up at five and while still crumpled down by the rail, AA sprays something into JA's face. The camera catches AA slipping a small can of pepper spray back into his bag. As the ref questions AA, JA stumbles around the ring and grabs into a golf bag and finds a bottle of water and pours it on his eyes to try and sooth them. JA gets back in and AA has a towel from one of the bags and tries to choke JA out with it. JA answers with a reflex action: a kick to the groin. Both guys go down again, and Johnny rolls back to the floor, and Daly sucker punches him! The ref tosses Daly to a chorus of boos! JA is up at six, grabs a golf glove out of the bag he brought down, and rolls back in. AA is up at seven and JA puts the glove on and takes a swing at AA, but the challenger ducks and hits a DDT instead. AA goes out and tosses one of the bags into the ring. AA puts on a glove of his own then takes another golf club and pulls JA to the corner, sits on the top turnbuckle and tries to choke out the champ again. JA is able to reach up however, and snap mare AA to the canvas, and he lands on the golf bag awkwardly. AA pulls himself up and JA punches him with his gloved hand and AA falls to the mat motionless. The announcers question whether the glove was loaded or not and the referee's count is up to five. At seven, a bloody AA begins to stir and he pulls himself up at nine. JA is pissed again.
JA grabs AA for the Adrenaline Rush, but AA slaps on the Claw out of nowhere, and the champ is in trouble. After about a minute in the claw, JA is out. And the ref begins his count. However, AA grabs a driver and, despite warnings from the official, lines up a shot on Johnny's head. AA takes his backswing but stops. The crowd boos. AA has a better idea and goes down to JA's spread out legs and the crowd begins to buzz, and sure enough, AA takes a mighty swing and NAILS the champion right in the jewels and the crowd goes bonkers! JA is in indescribable pain and AA has a huge smile on his face. The ref begins his count again. ...Seven, ...eight, ...nine, ...but somehow JA manages to pull himself up on the ropes. AA sets the club on the corner ropes and pulls JA back to the center of the ring. AA looks to attempt a Boston Crab, but JA fights it, so AA opts to catapult JA into the corner, where JA lands on the club and snaps it. AA grabs another club and pounds away on JA and L.D. Williams runs in and jumps AA. A fresh LDW opens up on AA with punches. As the ref tries to get LDW out of the ring, JA pulls the head cover off one driver and grabs a few golf balls and loads up the cover. The ref gets LDW out and JA limps over and lines up a shot, but AA instinctively hits JA low again, and JA sells it standing stiff. AA grabs the loaded head cover and pastes JA with it. However, before the ref can begin to count Beast runs out and begins brawling with LDW, and the referee tries to get them away from the ringside area. AA goes out to try and get Beast out of there. Beast hops in the golf cart and tries to run down whoever gets in his way. The crowd is counting a busted open JA out; they get to ten, fifteen, twenty. The ref finally grabs Beast and tries to restrain him., and AA goes back to the ring. AA slaps the Claw on JA, but LDW slips in with a chair and wallops AA with it. JA comes to and hits an Adrenaline Rush on the chair and both guys are out. LDW pulls the chair out of the ring and the referee finally gets back to the ring and begins a count. ...Seven... Johnny begins to stir. ...Eight...still no movement from AA. ...Nine...JA pulls himself up with the ropes, and LDW grabs him from behind to support his weight. ...Ten...and AA is still out at 27:03.
WINNER in 27:03 and still Intercontinental Champion, Johnny Adrenaline
Crowd boos the finish. LDW lets JA go, and Johnny falls to the floor in a heap. LDW helps a groggy JA to the back. AA, covered in blood, finally comes to and pulls himself up to a mixed reaction.
<Attitude Adjuster is standing outside the arena, looking very upset. With him is SFJ #27, beaming with excitement.>
SFJ#27: I am here with one half of the OOWF tag team champions, Attitude Adjuster, with an exclusive interview! So, Mr. Adjuster, what do you think about being suspended from competing at this week’s Midweek Mayhem?
AA (looking disdainfully at SFJ #27): Look, first off I don’t do interviews. I do promos. Great promos! This is beneath me. Besides, the fans just saw why Johnny Adrenaline and Attitude Adjuster are the greatest tag team ever...
SFJ #27: Because you beat the crap out of each other in a Country Club Death Match?
AA: Exactly! No, wait. No. Well, yes. This is why I don’t do interviews! But to answer your first question as to what I think about our suspension, how do you think I think? I’m a heel! I think it sucks! The Rick decided to suspend everyone just because wCw decided to chase around a pair of masked dudes because they thought they were The Chickenshit Heels under masks, and then cause havoc in the ring and throughout the arena? Does that seem right? Johnny Adrenaline and I didn’t do anything!
SFJ #27: Actually, I have some videotape here of you and Johnny hitting Capellan with chairs. Would you like to see it?
AA (smarmy voice): Would you like to see it? No, I don’t want to see it! Besides, it’s probably been tampered with, because Johnny and I didn’t do anything.
SFJ #27: Actually, I just got this off the raw video from last week.
AA: This is exactly why I don’t do interviews! You interviewer people are always getting in the way of my logic. Now look, this is the way it went down: I was casually eating a sandwich with Johnny when we saw wCw running down the hallway chasing two masked guys. It was probably Mierda Del Pollos Rudos, those guys from Northern Mexican Canada who lost to Nayr and Fly. Anyway, then we heard Niles call for help, and when we came to the ring we found Capellan about to beat down Niles with a chair. Yadda, yadda, yadda, and the whole place is in a riot. See, we didn’t do anything!
SFJ #27: Could you explain what happened during the “Yadda, yadda, yadda”? That seems a little unclear.
AA: I said it once and I’ll say it again. This is why I don’t do interviews!
SFJ #27: Let’s go to a different subject.
AA: Sure, anything.
SFJ #27: You recently lost the OOWF DDT Iron Man Title to Nayr. How do you feel about that?
AA: How do I feel about that now? Damn it, what are you, a psychiatrist? I feel that Nayr is a little runt…
SFJ #27: Actually, he’s a Halfling Luchador.
AA: Will you stop interrupting me? He’s a little runt who keeps sticking his nose in our business. First it was messing with our masked guy gimmick, then taking the DDT title…
SFJ #27: Are you admitting that the Pollos Rudos are actually The Chickenshit Heels?
AA: Will you stop using logic?!?! That’s it, this interview is OVER! Let’s go back to the ring for more great OOWF legends action. Now where’s my sandwich?THE BISCUIT SQUAD vs. DR. MURDER & MIKEY STYNER"WE WANT WORKRATE! YES WE DO! WE GOT WORKRATE! HOW BOUT YOU?" Yes, it's "Smoley" and "Smarky," in spandex outfits that are about six sizes too small, and they are bringing a trampoline with them. Smarky tries to lift Smoley above
him, but the Biscuit just collapses on him, so they try something else. Smarky springs off the trampoline into the ring, but Smoley jumps on it, and it breaks. As Smoley sells the trampoline fall, Murder and Styner put the beats on Smarky. CORONER SPLASH by Murder and then a fatass leg drop from Styner. One, two, but Smoley makes the save! The Biscuit opens up with lefts and rights on Murder, then kicks Styner backwards into the ropes where he gets tangled up. Murder bails to the floor, and right there, folks, is more offense than Smoley ever got in his entire career! The Biscuit Squad celebrates this watershed moment with a cheer: "GIVE ME A B! GIVE ME AN I! GIVE ME AN S! GIVE ME A... uh... um...." Smark forgets how to spell "Biscuit," and the momentary lack of spelling expertise allows THE EVIL WIZARD to run in and wallop Smark with the Million Dollar Belt! Smoley chases the Wizard off, but Styner frees himself, and he and Murder hit an H-Bomb on Smarky. One, two, three! Crowd boos that finish out of the building.
WINNERS in 4:22: DR. MURDER & MIKEY STYNER.
<SFJ11 catches up with OOWF World Heavyweight Champion Chris Cole outside the arena>
Cole: What do I think about having to be here at some washed up Legends Card while I’m suspended? What the hell do you think I think? I’m the World Heavyweight Champion. I’m the best damn wrestler in the world today. I should be treated with ticker tape parades when I come into every town. Instead our joke of a GM sits me in a dimly lit corner of a bingo hall while pimply little kids& fat chicks ask for my autograph. If you really wanted to see something special Rick would have allowed me to demolish every former Champion on the card to prove I was the best in the world. But don’t feel too bad for me, honey. Fell bad for Rick. The 3 Piece Set is not going to take this suspension lightly. Rick is going to realize there are consequences for his actions.BEST OF THE OOWF: June 1, 2005, MidWeek Mayhem
UNDERDAWG vs. CAPELLAN Capellan watches UnderDawg’s entrance with a look of grim determination on his face. Dawg finally makes it to the ring and Capellan strides right to the middle of the ring and offers his hand. UnderDawg eyes him for a moment then shakes the rookie’s hand. They go to opposite corners and wait for the bell. The bell rings and the two meet in the center of the ring, collar and elbow tie up, Capellan grabs a side headlock. UD quickly sends him to the ropes and tanks him down with a shoulder block. Capellan gets right back to his feet and they go at it again, this time UD scoops him up for a slam, but Capellan gets free and dropkicks UD in the back sending him staggering to the ropes. This seems to annoy UD more than anything else, and he charges at Capellan, Capellan ducks a clothesline, peppers UD with a few shots to the face, then grabs him and hits an Acid Drop! Capellan covers, but UD kicks out emphatically at two. Capellan springs to his feet and tries a kick to UD’s midsection, Dawg catches his foot, Capellan hits an enzuguri instead. It staggers UD. Capellan kips up off of the mat, but when he does, he kips up right into a UD chokehold. UD lifts the much lighter Capellan for a choke slam using just one arm. While in midair, Capellan grapevines his legs around UD’s arm and twists, UD tries to drop Capellan but Capellan holds on, turns slightly and has a fijiwara arm bar applied! UD makes it to the ropes and the ref forces the break. Capellan is to his feet first and he darts in snapping UD’s head back with shots to the jaw. Finally Capellan gets one step too close. UD grabs the back of his head with one hand and pulls him toward him, smashing him in the face with a forearm with the other. Capellan falls to the mat and looks stunned for a moment. UD grabs Capellan’s arm and pulls him to his feet, only to level him with a clothesline, he does this several times until Capellan is down on the mat, seemingly out. UD pulls him to his feet again, sends him to the ropes and connects wit ha big boot to the face. Capellan crumples to the mat and UD makes the cover. To everyone’s surprise, Capellan kicks out at two. UnderDawg goes on the massive offensive now, pummeling Capellan for the next several minutes. UnderDawg hits everything on Capellan, but the rookie just won’t stay down. UnderDawg throws Capellan out of the ring and brutalizes the youngster on the outside, slamming him on the concrete, sending him back first into the steel ring post, and barrier, slamming him on the ramp. UnderDawg finishes the brutalization by hitting a FirePlug Piledriver on the ring steps. Dawg rolls back in to accept his count out victory. The ref hits eight, but then Capellan’s bloody head pops up from the apron. Somehow he manages to make it back into the ring just before ten. UD grabs Capellan, pulls him up and scoops him for a slam; Cap frees himself and rolls UD up from behind for two. UD goes ballistic now; he tries to kick Capellan’s head into the seventh row, then hits a choke slam, once, twice, three times. Capellan kicks out! What the hell? UD lifts him and destroys him with a last ride, then follows it with yet another fireplug pile diver. This time Capellan cannot kick out.
WINNER in 15:15 UnderDawg
BEST OF THE OOWF: April 24, 2005, Blood on the Walls PPV
CONCRETE TG vs. MOOSEHEAD JACK – Steel Cage Match The two archenemies met in the center of the ring and exchange slaps. The slaps quickly escalate to punches, and we are on! Concrete goes on the offensive first, and within five minutes he has MHJ a bloody mess from repeated trips into the cage. Concrete gets the first near fall after a top rope belly to back suplex on Moose. Jack kicks out, Concrete pulls him to his feet, but Jack gets a shot to the face in, then turns and slams Concrete’s face into the cage. Jack grinds Concrete’s face into the unforgiving steel mesh, and finishes it off by hitting a running high knee that slams Concrete’s face into the cage and brings even more gore. The action continues for over a half an hour, both men ripping at the other, both men losing sick amounts of blood, I mean we are talking Muta levels of bleeding here folks. Jack has Concrete down after a big clothesline, but can’t see to make the cover. Jack corners the ref, then un-tucks his shirt to wipe his eyes. Now the ref has Moose blood all over his shirt. Of course when he turns around, Concrete kills him with a super kick to the mouth. At around the thirty-five minute mark both men are bloody messes and both men are down on the mat, fighting to stay conscious, and fighting to continue. Jack gets to his feet first, he pulls Concrete to his feet, Concrete explodes and hits a leg lariat, kicking Jack right in the temple. Both men are down. Concrete crawls over to Jack and makes the cover, 1,2….Jack just manages to get a shoulder up. Concrete pulls Jack up, sends him into the cage face first once again. Blood sprays through the cage and hits the people in the first row. Concrete grabs Jack and rams him into the cage on the opposite side. Jack staggers backward; Concrete grabs Jack and kills him with a Cement Mixer. Jack is out, but so is Concrete. The ref starts the long ten count. Finally around eight, Concrete pulls himself to his feet and falls across Jack. Once again Jack is able to kick out at two. Concrete is furious, and mounts Jack and pounds away at Jack’s head. Concrete whips Jack to the ropes, but puts his head down a moment too soon; Jack grabs Concrete and hits a jumping pile driver. Concrete’s neck may be broken. Concrete is out, but Jack is now too weak to take advantage of it right away. Jack lunges and drapes his arm across Concrete’s chest. Concrete kicks out at two. By now the members of the AYUFF and the Establishment have surrounded the ring. Jack pulls Concrete up by his hair, now it is Jack’s turn to run Concrete face first into the cage. Jack kicks Concrete in the mid section and plants him with a DDT, cover, Concrete just gets the shoulder up, now Jack snaps and pounds away on Concrete slamming his head into the mat. Jack tries for another pile driver; Concrete escapes it with a low blow. Concrete gets to his feet and tries a power bomb, but Jack shifts his weight and lands behind Concrete, Jack immediately grabs CTG’s arm, pins it, and hammers Concrete with a heart punch. Concrete staggers, but Jack won’t let him fall, Jack hits another, and another, never letting Concrete fall. Jack finally lets go, Concrete falls to the mat, limp and seemingly out cold. Jack picks him up one more time, and hits a double under hook DDT. Both men are down; Jack crawls to Concrete, rolls him over and makes the cover, this time Concrete cannot kick out.
WINNER in 44:19 Moosehead Jack.
Medical officials flood the ring and check on both men. The Establishment and the AYUFF both look concern, disturbed, and angry. Jack gets to his feet then walks over to Concrete who has just pulled himself to his feet. Jack looks at him and grins. The reality of what has just happened hits Concrete and he slumps to his knees and buries his face in his hands. Jack staggers out of the cage and he and the Establishment head to the back.
SFJ13 catches up with Moosehead Jack who had just been talking to Thim and LD Williams outside the arena>
SFJ13: Moose, can I have a word with you? What do you think about the suspensions?
MHJ: I hear they just showed me beating that fool Concrete TG and forcing him to be my partner. <smirks> Crete, don’t think things are done between us, they will NEVER be done.
SFJ13: Umm, what does that have to do with the suspensions?
MHJ: nothing, but if felt damn good to pop Crete in the mouth during the little…”incident”
SFJ13: You don’t seem very upset about being suspended?
MHJ: Hey, it is a day off. And from what I hear, while all of us may be suspended today, not all of us are lighter in the pocket because of it.
SFJ13: Are you saying some of the superstars are still being paid? That is….
MHJ Look, all I am saying is that Rick is smart enough that not EVERYONE needs to be punished for this. I am sure those who deserve it most will get what they deserve.
SFJ13: There are some people calling for GM the Rick to be fired and replaced, what are your thoughts on that?
MHJ: Well, that is just people thinking in anger. Look, as I said, some people may be overreacting to this. It was a little fight, but it is also going to draw the OOWF bigger ratings, and in the end it is good for business, right Rick? Of course it is.
Trust me.20 MAN OVER THE TOP ROPE BATTLE ROYALEndo, Morte, Hellion, Ecosystem, L.J. Bennett, Ric Flair, Abdullah the Butcher,
Ron Simmons, the Repo Man, Jesus R. Kidneypuncher (back from the dead yet
again,) Smark, "The Biscuit" Brad Smoley, Blade, Chuck Norris, Dr. Murder, Mikey
Styner, GimmickMan, & Mark Vander.
Boy, Vander sure looks different than the last time we saw him. Last I remember, he was drinking Mountain Dew, riding a skateboard, and preparing to meet Missy's parents. How times have changed. Bell sounds and the Chickenshit Heel Posse and the Establishment throw down on one side of the ring. GM and MV fight off Murder and Styner, while the Biscuit and Smark beg off from Norris. Blade tries his hand one more time on Norris, but Norris stops him with a throat thrust, kicks him a few times, then lands a reverse roundhouse that sends Blade flying over the top rope to the floor. Simmons slips out of the big fray however, grabs Smoley and gives him the DOMINATOR~! Then another DOMINATOR~! Spinebuster for Smark, and Simmons dumps Smark out. Meanwhile, Hellion clotheslines Repo Man over and out. Repo lands next to Smark, quietly tip toes
away and grabs the trampoline and STEALS IT! Murder misses a charge on MV, and Vander with the CLOTHESLINE FROM HELL~! Murder over the top and is gone! Meanwhile, in the corner, Flair is opening up on L.J. Bennett with chops. Ecosystem comes over to break, but Flair no-sells it because he's Ric Flair. RF dumps Eco to the floor, then Bennett as well. WHOOOOOO! Flair flops, and blades for good measure. Endo grabs an unconscious Biscuit and slaps on THE CLAW~! But Abby sees Endo using AA's hold, and flips out. Abby pulls out a fork and drives it into Endo's head! Blood is gushing now! Morte over to try and stop it, but Jesus punches him in the kidneys and tosses him to the floor. Grunt does break it up by just walking into them, and we have the fatass stare down of DOOM! Speaking of Doom, Simmons gives Smoley ANOTHER DOMINATOR~! Styner over to join in on the fatass party. Too bad Smoley is unconscious, or he could be there, too. Abby, Grunt, and Styner all yell at each other, presumably over who has the best dieting techniques, but Norris has decided he's sat back idly enough and with ONE KICK takes ALL THREE FAT GUYS OVER THE TOP TO THE FLOOR~! Simmons just looks at the scene, "Damn." GimmickMan dumps Endo over and out. And Jesus and Flair team up on LI. Hellion over to break that, but Jesus punches him in the kidneys and tosses him, too. Simmons with ANOTHER DOMINATOR on Smoley, then a spine buster for Vander. RS grabs GM for a running power slam, but Flair pushes him from behind to the ropes, and BOTH GUYS go over the top and out! Simmons can't believe it, and gets a WHOOOOOOO for his troubles. Flair flops again. LI comes off the top with a 450 onto Flair, and goes up again, but Norris catches him with a dropkick on the way down, and LI flies backwards into the third row! Vander with the DEAL BREAKER on Smoley, but Jesus punches in the kidneys and dumps him. FINAL FOUR: Ric Flair, Jesus D. Kidneypuncher, "The Biscuit" Brad Smoley, & Chuck Norris. Flair goes to Norris and they decide to team up on Smoley and Jesus. But Flair double crosses Norris and dumps him! Flair celebrates with a strut, but Norris hangs on, and Flair shits his pants when he turns around. Flair, shaking head, "NOOOOOOOOOOO!" Norris comes at Flair, but Flair pokes him in the eye. Jesus over and Flair holds Norris. KIDNEY PUNCHES~! But Norris moves, and Jesus hits Flair instead! Karate kick for Jesus, and Norris with a judo throw on Flair over the top and
gone! Norris and Flair have words as the refs have to restrain Flair. Meanwhile, Jesus punches Smoley in the kidneys, but before he can dump him, Norris draws his attention. Jesus and Norris have words, and Jesus protests that he can walk on water. KIDNEY PUNCHES TO NORRIS~! But Norris NO-SELLS THEM! Jesus doesn't know what to do! Norris with some kicks, but Jesus no-sells them, on the account that he's had nails through his wrists before. Norris and Jesus look at each other like they're each crazy, and the brawl is on! Lefts and rights, forget that kung fu stuff. Jesus tosses Chuck, but
Norris holds on. Back in, Norris tosses Jesus, but Jesus holds on! Jesus with
a Cactus clothesline, and BOTH guys go over and touch the floor, leaving an
unconscious Biscuit as our victor!
WINNER in 21:00: "The Biscuit" Brad Smoley
Thanks for coming out and watching LIVE OOWF action be sure to check out the OOWF Mid-Summer Night’s Scream PPV, Live June 25th from Jigger, Louisiana! And don’t forget to catch next week’s OOWF MidWeek Mayhem, June 7th, live from Mud Butte, South Dakota!
For more details, check out our website! oowf.pantslessfury.com/oowf !
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This has been an OOWF production, produced by the LD-Mad-Tar-Jack-Attitude-Jodrell-Kid-CTG Production Company in accordance with Ecosystem Ltd.
