Post by mooseheadjack on Apr 18, 2008 19:24:27 GMT -5
-Remember: Done by coin flip. Any things you want to add to the show, post below.
Our announcers J.P. and Razz come out and welcome us to DEAD BABY BONANZA, the first ever OOWF show! LIVE in the Mythological Land of Dayton, OH!
J.P. And look, here comes the Dead Baby to kick off the show!
(The music hits and out comes the Dancing Dead Litakane Fetus! He does a spinnerooni to wild applause WHEN-
BONG.
Underdawg appears on his ATV to start up our first match, which is...
UnderDawg vs. L.D.Williams
The match quickly degenerates into a brawl, with both combatants coming close to countouts. Turning point is when UnderDawg goes for the Dawg School, but L.D. hops up and DDTs him off the apron. L.D. celebrates in-ring mocking the crowd, assuming a countout. Underdawg gets back in at 8 though, and manages to chokeslam L.D. for a quick cover.
Winner-UnderDawg.
While UnderDawg makes his entrance to the back, Grunt runs out foaming at the mouth wildly. he tries to attack UnderDawg, but UnderDawg takes him down by running directly into him with an ATV. Grunt is stunned as we start up for-
Donnie Viper vs. Grunt
A stunned Grunt stumbles into the ring and runs at Donnie Viper. Donnie tries to dodge, but Grunt's assistants hold him there. Donnie ducks though, and Grunt flips over the ropes onto the announce table. Grunt's out for good this time, and the ref counts him out.
Winner-Donovan Viper
Coming up next show: The Quarter-Dollar Hooker Search! Only in the OOWF, baby!
Hardbody Harris vs. Brad "The Biscuit"
Hardbody wrestles circles around the Biscuit in the beginning, even nailing the famed TO BE EDITED IN LATER! But after that, Smoley falls into the ref. REF BUMP~! The entire heel backstage locker room empties and attacks Hardbody with multiple weapons. The Biscuit is so exited, he hits Hardbody over the head with a whisky bottle. But the ref was up by then. DQ~!
Winner: Hardbody Harris
The Biscuit is so angry he begins stomping on Harris. But after three stomps, he gets kind of winded, and decides to leave. The paramedics take Harris out on a stretcher due to possible damage to the Jehosophat. Those heal quick.
Blackdragon vs. ConcreteTG
Concrete TG controls most of the opening sets of moves, and for the most part, Blackdragon looks taken off guard. All of a sudden, Black Dragon spins around and locks in the CHINLOCK OF DEATH~! But the referee hates chinlocks, and tells Black Dragon to break it up or he'll tell the entire IWC that Black Dragon is a whiny overpushed superstar that got there on his dad's name. While Black Dragon is arguing with Mr. Lund, Takayan Gryfon gets the Dragon in a Scaffold Hold! Black Dragon makes it to the ropes, and as soon as Concrete breaks the hold, Dragon flips off those ropes with a Desending Dragon to TG! He grabs the tights and puts his feet on the ropes, but the referee doesn't notice, and counts to three.
Winner-Black Dragon
JP gets up and yells at the referee that the decision should be reversed due to obvious evidence, and he rolls the footage. But no one cares, and Razz puts JP in a Razzmission so we can all laugh. Black Dragon nails the referee with a chair for no apparant reason, and Takayon grabs him from behind and makes him tap to the Scaffold. (Black Dragon, not the referee.)
Blade vs. Gimmickman
Black Dragon pops back up before this match begins and nails Gimmickman with a chair. He then exits the arena in a rage, during which time the bell rings. Blade walks over and covers Gimmickman, but he just kicks out. Gimmickman somehow pulls a Brock Lesnar At Wrestlemania XIX and gets Blade up for teh Spartan Plunge, but Blade flips off onto the ropes and nails Gimmickman with an Asai DDT onto the chair which was left. While the crowd reflects on how freaking cool that move is, Blade gets a three-count.
Winner-Blade.
Ecosystem comes out in a striped shirt and proclaims himself the special guest referee for the next match.
Ecosystem: I am the special guest referee for this next match! Unquote!
And wouldntcha know it, it's...
Hellion w/ Corax vs. EricOMac
Hellion immediately picks up the steel chair that's still there and drills Eco with it. Hey, he ain't stupid. Another ref comes out and it's ON. Hellion and EricOMac have some back-and-forth cruiserweight action punctuated by many high spots. Hellion nails a Hell's Fury on EricOMac, but Eric gets his foot on the bottom rope at two. Corax starts yelling at the referee, and while the referee is distracted, hellion picks up the chair. And WOULDN'T YOU KNOW IT, that's the ONLY situation EricOMac can hit his move! So he hits the Mac Drop. but the referee is still talking to Corax. So Eric walks over to complain. But everyone ignores him. Then Hellion low blows Eric and rolls him up. THEN Corax shuts up, and 1-2-3 Hellion wins.
Winner-Hellion.
Hellion and Corax celebrate in ring, though Corax admonishes his partner for his heelish actions. Eco, deciding to forgo the chair, just swings a ladder from outside the ring taking Corax and Hellion down. The crowd boos, and he realizes that was kind of heelish, so he grabs a microphone.
Eco: I LOVE DAYTON!
Crowd: YAY!
JP: Ladies and Gentlemen, something's happening outside!
We cut to backstage where Brad "The Biscuit" Smoley is walking out to the ambulance to attack Hardbody some more. He opens the doors, and HARDBODY ATTACKS! He smashes Brad with a fist, and then stomps on brad twice as long as Brad stomped on him, which is....six times. So then he leaves. Someone steals the ambulance.
NEXT!
Outback Jack vs. Maximo Morte
There is some quick brawling in the beginning of this, and Outback Jack manages to get the better of it with a stomp to the gut. He attempts a Boomerang, but Maximo ducks. He stomps him again, and we repeat. Duck.
This happens MANY MORE TIMES until Outback Jack decides to just use a Croc Hunter, and Maximo is so surprised at this technical knowledge that he taps out. And such is the power of WORKRATE~!
Winner: Outback Jack.
Corax vs. Moosehead Jack
Ecosystem is back as the referee. So Corax, who is still feeling the ladder shot, throws punches back and forth with him. Moosehead Jack is a heel, so he then debates who to attack. He remembers that Attack Face > Attack Neutral, so he sets Ecosystem on fire. So Eco disqualifies Mooshead Jack. THEN he declares a non-tournament rematch between Corax and Moosehead Jack next week. AND THEN, AND ONLY THEN, does he stop, drop, and roll. Moosehead Jack breathes fire at Corax, and Corax runs. He ain't stupid either.
Johnny Adrenaline vs. Ecosystem
Johnny Adrenaline runs out and sees Ecosystem is burnt, and poses as he makes a cover. Except there's no referee. Because Ecosystem is the referee. So Johnny Adrenaline calls for a ref, but Eco rolls him up and makes about a .00000001 second count before declaring himself the winner.
JP: He can't do that!
Razz: I'm not sure. Eco, can you do that?
Eco: Yes. Yes I can.
Johnny: Are you sure you're the good guy?
Eco: Uhhh.....I LOVE DAYTON! (Big Pop)
Johnny beats on Eco because he thought of that first. Actually, Hulk Hogan did. But close. Canadian Dragon makes the save by throwing Johnny into the audience. Then he does the same to Eco, because DANGIT, he's got a MATCH!
Microplay vs. Canadian Dragon
This is the last match of teh night, so both combantants do their best to make it special. There are trash cans, chairs, and tables, and that's just in the audience! By the 10-minute mark, both contestants are bleeding profusely. They both go up for their respective moves, turning their backs and therefore not knowing the other guy got up. Blood in the eyes can't help. They go flying with a Super Splash and Dragon Sault, and they both EAT IT (canvas). A referee runs out and decides to disqulaify the next guy he sees with a weapon. Every fan in the front row immediately gets diqualified. In the meantime, Microplay draps an arm over the Canadian Dragon, and the referee counts 1-2-3.
Winner: Microplay.
JP: Well that's all for Dead Baby Bonanza! I hope you folks enjoyed yourself and-
Razz: RAZZMISSION!
JP: AHHHH!
Crowd: HA HA!
-Fade to OOWF Logo-
Our announcers J.P. and Razz come out and welcome us to DEAD BABY BONANZA, the first ever OOWF show! LIVE in the Mythological Land of Dayton, OH!
J.P. And look, here comes the Dead Baby to kick off the show!
(The music hits and out comes the Dancing Dead Litakane Fetus! He does a spinnerooni to wild applause WHEN-
BONG.
Underdawg appears on his ATV to start up our first match, which is...
UnderDawg vs. L.D.Williams
The match quickly degenerates into a brawl, with both combatants coming close to countouts. Turning point is when UnderDawg goes for the Dawg School, but L.D. hops up and DDTs him off the apron. L.D. celebrates in-ring mocking the crowd, assuming a countout. Underdawg gets back in at 8 though, and manages to chokeslam L.D. for a quick cover.
Winner-UnderDawg.
While UnderDawg makes his entrance to the back, Grunt runs out foaming at the mouth wildly. he tries to attack UnderDawg, but UnderDawg takes him down by running directly into him with an ATV. Grunt is stunned as we start up for-
Donnie Viper vs. Grunt
A stunned Grunt stumbles into the ring and runs at Donnie Viper. Donnie tries to dodge, but Grunt's assistants hold him there. Donnie ducks though, and Grunt flips over the ropes onto the announce table. Grunt's out for good this time, and the ref counts him out.
Winner-Donovan Viper
Coming up next show: The Quarter-Dollar Hooker Search! Only in the OOWF, baby!
Hardbody Harris vs. Brad "The Biscuit"
Hardbody wrestles circles around the Biscuit in the beginning, even nailing the famed TO BE EDITED IN LATER! But after that, Smoley falls into the ref. REF BUMP~! The entire heel backstage locker room empties and attacks Hardbody with multiple weapons. The Biscuit is so exited, he hits Hardbody over the head with a whisky bottle. But the ref was up by then. DQ~!
Winner: Hardbody Harris
The Biscuit is so angry he begins stomping on Harris. But after three stomps, he gets kind of winded, and decides to leave. The paramedics take Harris out on a stretcher due to possible damage to the Jehosophat. Those heal quick.
Blackdragon vs. ConcreteTG
Concrete TG controls most of the opening sets of moves, and for the most part, Blackdragon looks taken off guard. All of a sudden, Black Dragon spins around and locks in the CHINLOCK OF DEATH~! But the referee hates chinlocks, and tells Black Dragon to break it up or he'll tell the entire IWC that Black Dragon is a whiny overpushed superstar that got there on his dad's name. While Black Dragon is arguing with Mr. Lund, Takayan Gryfon gets the Dragon in a Scaffold Hold! Black Dragon makes it to the ropes, and as soon as Concrete breaks the hold, Dragon flips off those ropes with a Desending Dragon to TG! He grabs the tights and puts his feet on the ropes, but the referee doesn't notice, and counts to three.
Winner-Black Dragon
JP gets up and yells at the referee that the decision should be reversed due to obvious evidence, and he rolls the footage. But no one cares, and Razz puts JP in a Razzmission so we can all laugh. Black Dragon nails the referee with a chair for no apparant reason, and Takayon grabs him from behind and makes him tap to the Scaffold. (Black Dragon, not the referee.)
Blade vs. Gimmickman
Black Dragon pops back up before this match begins and nails Gimmickman with a chair. He then exits the arena in a rage, during which time the bell rings. Blade walks over and covers Gimmickman, but he just kicks out. Gimmickman somehow pulls a Brock Lesnar At Wrestlemania XIX and gets Blade up for teh Spartan Plunge, but Blade flips off onto the ropes and nails Gimmickman with an Asai DDT onto the chair which was left. While the crowd reflects on how freaking cool that move is, Blade gets a three-count.
Winner-Blade.
Ecosystem comes out in a striped shirt and proclaims himself the special guest referee for the next match.
Ecosystem: I am the special guest referee for this next match! Unquote!
And wouldntcha know it, it's...
Hellion w/ Corax vs. EricOMac
Hellion immediately picks up the steel chair that's still there and drills Eco with it. Hey, he ain't stupid. Another ref comes out and it's ON. Hellion and EricOMac have some back-and-forth cruiserweight action punctuated by many high spots. Hellion nails a Hell's Fury on EricOMac, but Eric gets his foot on the bottom rope at two. Corax starts yelling at the referee, and while the referee is distracted, hellion picks up the chair. And WOULDN'T YOU KNOW IT, that's the ONLY situation EricOMac can hit his move! So he hits the Mac Drop. but the referee is still talking to Corax. So Eric walks over to complain. But everyone ignores him. Then Hellion low blows Eric and rolls him up. THEN Corax shuts up, and 1-2-3 Hellion wins.
Winner-Hellion.
Hellion and Corax celebrate in ring, though Corax admonishes his partner for his heelish actions. Eco, deciding to forgo the chair, just swings a ladder from outside the ring taking Corax and Hellion down. The crowd boos, and he realizes that was kind of heelish, so he grabs a microphone.
Eco: I LOVE DAYTON!
Crowd: YAY!
JP: Ladies and Gentlemen, something's happening outside!
We cut to backstage where Brad "The Biscuit" Smoley is walking out to the ambulance to attack Hardbody some more. He opens the doors, and HARDBODY ATTACKS! He smashes Brad with a fist, and then stomps on brad twice as long as Brad stomped on him, which is....six times. So then he leaves. Someone steals the ambulance.
NEXT!
Outback Jack vs. Maximo Morte
There is some quick brawling in the beginning of this, and Outback Jack manages to get the better of it with a stomp to the gut. He attempts a Boomerang, but Maximo ducks. He stomps him again, and we repeat. Duck.
This happens MANY MORE TIMES until Outback Jack decides to just use a Croc Hunter, and Maximo is so surprised at this technical knowledge that he taps out. And such is the power of WORKRATE~!
Winner: Outback Jack.
Corax vs. Moosehead Jack
Ecosystem is back as the referee. So Corax, who is still feeling the ladder shot, throws punches back and forth with him. Moosehead Jack is a heel, so he then debates who to attack. He remembers that Attack Face > Attack Neutral, so he sets Ecosystem on fire. So Eco disqualifies Mooshead Jack. THEN he declares a non-tournament rematch between Corax and Moosehead Jack next week. AND THEN, AND ONLY THEN, does he stop, drop, and roll. Moosehead Jack breathes fire at Corax, and Corax runs. He ain't stupid either.
Johnny Adrenaline vs. Ecosystem
Johnny Adrenaline runs out and sees Ecosystem is burnt, and poses as he makes a cover. Except there's no referee. Because Ecosystem is the referee. So Johnny Adrenaline calls for a ref, but Eco rolls him up and makes about a .00000001 second count before declaring himself the winner.
JP: He can't do that!
Razz: I'm not sure. Eco, can you do that?
Eco: Yes. Yes I can.
Johnny: Are you sure you're the good guy?
Eco: Uhhh.....I LOVE DAYTON! (Big Pop)
Johnny beats on Eco because he thought of that first. Actually, Hulk Hogan did. But close. Canadian Dragon makes the save by throwing Johnny into the audience. Then he does the same to Eco, because DANGIT, he's got a MATCH!
Microplay vs. Canadian Dragon
This is the last match of teh night, so both combantants do their best to make it special. There are trash cans, chairs, and tables, and that's just in the audience! By the 10-minute mark, both contestants are bleeding profusely. They both go up for their respective moves, turning their backs and therefore not knowing the other guy got up. Blood in the eyes can't help. They go flying with a Super Splash and Dragon Sault, and they both EAT IT (canvas). A referee runs out and decides to disqulaify the next guy he sees with a weapon. Every fan in the front row immediately gets diqualified. In the meantime, Microplay draps an arm over the Canadian Dragon, and the referee counts 1-2-3.
Winner: Microplay.
JP: Well that's all for Dead Baby Bonanza! I hope you folks enjoyed yourself and-
Razz: RAZZMISSION!
JP: AHHHH!
Crowd: HA HA!
-Fade to OOWF Logo-