OOWF MidWeek Mayhem 03-19-08

[mooseheadjack]

OOWF MidWeek Mayhem
Live! From Sparta, New Jersey

OOWF World Heavyweight Title Match[/u]
Stank vs. LD Williams

OOWF Intercontinental Title Triple Threat Match[/u]
F. Fonzworth MacCappington III vs. The Dead vs. Firewoman

OOWF World Tag Team Title Match[/u]
Phantos & Lucios vs. Blitz & Voltage

OOWF Onslaught Championship 15 Minute Beat the Clock Match[/u]
Eric O'Mac vs. Bunny

Tag Team Turmoil Match - Winners Get a Tag Title Shot Next Week[/u]
The Heels vs. The Midnight Sons vs. Seamus McNasty & Damon Wrath vs. IHOP

Run DLP EXPLODES! - Phantos Special Guest Referee[/u]
Lucios vs. Davin Moreland

Alexander Darling vs. Donovan Viper
Chris Cole vs. Moosehead Jack
Outback Jack vs. The Nerve Agent
Firechild vs. Ecosystem
Davin Moreland vs. Ryan Hardcore vs. Capellan

card subject to loss of domain

[mooseheadjack]

It is chaos in the DEA Luxury Suites. Firewoman has the stereo blasting some kind of crazy Ramones, Flogging Molly, Disturbed, and Black Sabbath rotation. She runs in and out of her locker room in a flurry of activity, with her new valet, Lucky, following along, trying to be of assistance.

FW: Yeah, I'll need to take that, but I think the rest of it can get packed up to head to the next city. Where are we going again?

L: [Looking at sheet] Um.... Sparta, NJ.

FW: New Jersey? That hell hole? Oh well....

L: Looks like you're in a threeway for the IC title. Isn't that the one Alexander wants?

FW: Hm...yeah it is. I'll have to get with him on that.

Firewoman finishes up packing her luggage, when Alexis walks in.

Alexis: Going somewhere?

FW: Well, yeah, I get a weekend getaway, according to your brother.

Alexis: Well, plans have changed. You have a title match next week, and DEA needs you to stay focused on that.

FW: What? Lucky, get Alex on the phone...

Alexis: Alex is in complete agreement with me.

FW: Oh? Was he also in complete agreement with you on the Spirit Squad?

Alexis: [laughs] Wasn't that great?

FW: No, that was most definitely not great. It was about as far from great as you can get, in fact. It's bad enough I have to deal with the Stefani song.

Alexis: Yes well, you'll just have to deal with it.

FW: Look. I need to get out of town. I have so much energy and adrenaline pumping right now.... I told Davin third time is a charm... and I'm going.

Alexis: No you aren't. I've already contacted the jet and the limo, so you can't do an end-run-around me like you did last time. And we're going straight from the arena, to the airport, to New Jersey. And before you decide to book your own flights, your credit card has been temporarily suspended.

Firewoman considers the quickest and most satisfying way to dispose of this development, but before she can decide what would cause the least amount of blood to get on her clothes, Alexis notices Lucky, who has been standing mid-pace, trying to figure out what he should do with Firewoman's things.

Alexis: Who are you?

L: Eugenio Gutierrez....er, Lucky. I'm Firewoman's valet.

Alexis: What? Since when?

L: Since last night.

Alexis: Well, I'm sorry to say but your employment with Firewoman was not approved by DEA. We'll give a generous settlement for your... what, twelve hours of work? But after that you'll have to find a job elsewhere.

FW: No he fucking will not. OOWF movers have broken most of my training equipment, and that mic stand you hired for my promos has all the personality of a dump truck. I need someone I can trust.

Alexis: Look, I don't need this right now. Between your diva charades and the impending civil war I've had it up to here, and you are not going to push your way through this. You are staying and you are not having your own valet!!!

FW: Did you seriously just call me a diva?

Well, the tension in the room just took an amazing leap. Lucky stands against the wall, not quite sure what he should do. The two women come nose to nose, and things look like they might get more out of hand, but at that moment Alexander staggers from another room, where he's been recuperating, summoned by the noise.

Alex: What the hell?

The two women start to argue, loudly, their respective sides of the story. Alexander listens for a moment, or at least he appears to try.

Alex: Alright, enough!!!!. He thinks for a moment in the silence. He turns to Firewoman. Look, I know I said you could have this weekend, but that was before I saw you had another shot at MacCappington. I don't think I need to tell you what an IC title belt win would mean to DEA, especially with the way battle lines are being drawn around here. You can have your vacation after that, okay?

FW: No, it is not okay. I'm not a prisoner, I can come and go as I please.

Alex: [with Cheshire cat smile] Of course you can! That's never been in question. I just really need you to think about what an IC title win means not just for DEA, but for your career! The first woman in OOWF to win the IC title?

[OOC: I'll need to verify that, when OO comes back online]

It appears Alexander has found the right combination of words and pushed the right buttons, as Firewoman relaxes a bit.

FW: Fine. It doesn't sparkle, but fine. But I get to keep Lucky over there. Seriously, if one more of my bags gets ripped and ring attire gets lost at airports, I'm going to blow a gasket.

Alex: Sure, that's fine, whatever you want.

FW: Fine. C'mon Lucky, let's get this stuff into the limo.

Lucky and Firewoman leave with her things. Alexis stares daggers at her brother.

Alexander: If that wasn't blowing a gasket, I hate to see what that looks like.

Alexis: So she gets her way. Again.

Alexander: How do you figure that? She's not leaving, she's staying. Voluntarily. And we don't have to play our ace card yet.

Alexis: But the valet. He could be a problem.

Alexander: He won't be. Let her keep her pet project for now.

[mooseheadjack]

[The Dead just happens to be leaning against the wall as Firewoman and Lucky storm out of the DEA suite.]

Dead: Nice match this week.

Fire: You too. Except for the, you know...

Dead: Yeah, well, between you and The Dead, Fonzie isn't leaving with that belt. Also, The Dead couldn't help but overhear what just happened in there.

Fire: Oh, you heard that?

Dead: Yeah...Look, if it wasn't obvious before, now is the time to join Bennett.

Fire: I told you I'd think about it.

Dead: Make sure you do.

[Firewoman and Lucky head off to the limo. The Dead peeks into the DEA suite where Alex and Alexis still look a little heated. The Dead smiles a little and heads to his locker room.]

[mooseheadjack]

*Davin Moreland is SITTING~! on the edge of a gurney and is being attended to by a legit paramedic following his match with Firewoman where he knocked himself the fuck out, and after the surprise run-in later on w/ Cole to make the save for Firechild. Cole is with Firechild who is being wheeled to the triage area where Moreland is. Cole stares him down and decides to confront him*

CC: Moreland.

DM: *a woozy Davin looks over toward the voice* Cole?

CC: What the fuck was that?

DM: What the fuck was what?

CC: *produces his IPhone, which has, conveniently, last night's Mayhem stored on it*

:
Firechild wins a horrifically bloody and brutal match. As he leaves the cage LOADED attacks him. Weak from the match he can do nothing to defend himself. Eco and MacCappington have him set up for a spike pile driver on the floor when Cole and……Davin Moreland? Come and chase the rest of LOADED off with chairs. Cole eyes Moreland warily as he helps Firechild to his feet.

CC: So? What the fuck, Moreland?

DM: *holds his head in obvious pain* Oh, that.

CC: Yeah, that.

DM: Well, what the fuck Cole? You expect me to sit back and watch as two key workers on the same side as me get the shit beat out of them? Is that what you want? Stay out of it Davin? This doesn't concern you? Bullshit. Bullshit. Of course it concerns me. Anyone on Rick's side is my concern now more than ever. Not only am I tired of LOADED's antics regarding Firechild; and not only am I sick of watching him get beat down each week; I am also responsible for keeping everyone on the team in harm's way. That's part of my job too. Now if you don't like it; that's to bad. I'm not here to stroke egos, and Rick told you as much. The egos have to be set aside for this to work; and damn it, you know it. *holds his head again*

CC: You're not the leader here, Moreland. I'm "The Main Event". I'm Chris Cole. I have the experience. I have the resume. I lead this team.

DM: Fine. You're "the leader". If that's what it takes to make you feel better; that's fine. That doesn't change my responsibilities; and it won't change my actions; but you can be the leader.

CC: Don't patronize me, Moreland.

DM: Cole, you were offered my job. You said no. You didn't think I knew that, did you? All you need to do is be Chris Cole. You want to pump guys up? You want to lead them. You want to be the face of Team Rick? I have no problem with that at all. Just understand that *I* have things to do, and responsibilities that may require me stepping on your toes from time to time. And if you want to talk about patronizing, let's talk about your attempt to big-time me here. Facts are, one of us was Champ a lot more recently than the other, and one of us has 5 straight wins over the other. If you really want to push this, we can push this; but it will take away energy from where its needed most.

CC: So, I'm just supposed to let you do this? Let you take over?

DM: I'm not taking over.

CC: Bullshit.

DM: I'm NOT TAKING OVER! I'm a role player. It involves me having responsibilities to Rick, and one of those is protecting the talent if need be. Firechild needed my help. So did you. Get the fuck over it and move on Cole. You know, I STILL don't fucking trust you, and I probably never will; but if we're going to work together, and it looks like we are, we have to put this shit aside for the time being. Even if you don't want to; you have to trust me; or at least put your lack of trust aside, like it or not.

CC: If you stay out of my business; we won't have a problem.

DM: I agree. But if you need a save; know I'm coming. That's my job.

CC: Just stay out of my business.

DM: And you stay out of mine.

CC: Fine.

DM: Fine.

*Cole goes to check on the bloodied Firechild. Capellan wanders over to Davin*

C: I guess we have a match this week.

DM: *laying back on the gurney* Looks that way.

C: This match will go a long way as to deciding what side of the fence I land on.

DM: Why?

C: Because I promo so infrequently that we need to figure something out.

DM: Ah.

C: So just know, it's every man for himself in there.

DM: No shit. It's a triple-threat.

C: Yeah...

DM: You mind, Capellan? I'm trying to sleep off my concussion here.

C: Oh yeah...sure.

*he leaves*

DM: *turns to the nearest Ninja Camera* I know you don't care what I think, Firewoman - but you are a more than worthy opponent; and you more than deserved to win. No excuses. I hope it helps you going forward, experience-wise; and I wish you the best of luck this upcoming week...Coffee Cup aside; that's done with. Life's too short.

*mumble in the background*

DM: I dunno if he's called Rick yet; but regardless; I'll be ready if he wants to go. Besides, some of this has been building for a while; and getting it all out, we can go back to being partners and friends again.

*mumbling*

DM: No, I'm done. I need Vicodin. Someone close this door?

*the door closes*

*fade*

[mooseheadjack]

The Heels are again back in the vacation island with SFJ #29.

JA: Well, appaarently we were wrong. We admit it. Outback Jack and Voltage were so bad that even The Heels couldn't make a match worthy of our fans. That's why we had a court order preventing the match from being viewed. You, the paying fans, will never see that match because it was undeserving of your viewership. And for that we blame Outback Jack and Voltage.

AA: The less said about them and that match, the better. But if you notice, we are now in the home of the former--and maybe returning--PHWF, where we helped build the federation from the ground up as the first PHWF tag team champions. So it's only fitting that THE world tag team champions are spreading the wealth, going beyond the OOWF, to compete in the home of the PHWF. So who do we have this week, Johnny?

JA: Looks like a bunch of bozos competing in an OOWF tag team contender match. Not sure why we're there. Uniting the belts is so beneath us.

AA: Well, we could defend our titles in that match.

JA: We could. But first we have to check our contracts. There might be some stipulation that prevents us from defending the World Tag Team titles is a sesspool like New Jersey.

AA: You're right. We must check on that. It's so good of Bennett to have our best interests in mind.

JA: Actually, let's let our laywers do the legwork. Meanwhile, I have 36 holes of golf to play...

AA: ...and I haave NCAA conference tournaments to bet.

JA: Busy, busy, busy...

AA: The life of champions...

[mooseheadjack]

<Davin wakes up after a fitful sleep in his private room. Time has passed and the room is half cloaked in darkness. Moreland sits up and tries to shake the effects of the concussion when he hears a voice coming from a dark corner of the room>

V: Not so easy is it

DM:<without even looking up> Moose. How the fuck did you get in here?

MHJ: Not too hard really. The nurses think all wrestlers are the same, they don't know us from anyone else. And you pissed Lucios off enough that he and Phantos are nowhere in sight.

DM: So what the hell do you want? My head already hurts enough, I don't need your shit on top of it.

MHJ: No bullshit Moreland, I just wanted to get a feel for Darlings chances with Rick..........and with you

DM: Rick, hell I don't know what the hell is going on with him right now. He risks losing help so he can get a laugh, his head is hardly in the game. My guess is it wouldn't take much for him to agree to Darling's terms. whatever they may be.

MHJ: And you?

DM: I've already said I will put personal feelings aside to win this war. Hell I am already working with Cole

MHJ: Exactly. How many enemies will you surround yourself with to win? You are putting yourself in a precarious position, for what?

DM: For the OOWF

MHJ: The OOWF will exist no matter who wins. With Bennett it will just be a more focused vision.

DM: That benefits you?

MHJ: I am going to be there no matter who wins this. Rick needs to learn a lesson. Thats what this is about for me, not position or titles. I know where I stand in the OOWF, and I know if I want a title, I can get one

DM: Despite what Darling thinks?

MHJ: I could give a shit what Darling thinks.

DM: Which is why you are pushing him away from Bennett? You are making it too easy Moose.

MHJ: Let me ask you this Moreland. Do you really think Darling is content being a foot soldier in this? Do you really think he has ANY intention of playing second fiddle to ANYONE?

DM: If he sides with the Rick, he is doing Rick's work so......

MHJ: And you REALLY think Darling would sign on just to "do the right thing"? Think about the state Rick is in, and think about Darling's ambitions. Now, put two and two together and think about what could happen if people don't keep Darling in check

DM: You aren't saying he would.....

MHJ: In a second. And that would be worse than anything we have going on now.

DM: He would never......

MHJ: He will say all the right things, of course. He will tell you I am crazy, that I am all talk. But Look at what he has done so far since he has been here. He has schemed to take the Onslaught title from you. Any reason to think that he would stop there.

<Moreland gets to his feet and paces around the room for a minute deep in thought. He finally turns back to where the voice was and flips on the light. The seat is empty.>

DM: Christ, I must have hit my head harder than I thought. Maybe

[mooseheadjack]

*Davin Moreland makes his way out to the hallway, and to a door with no markings. He cracks it open and sees only a single light bulb, swinging*

DM: Moose, listen. I know how you feel about Darling. I know how I feel about Darling. Neither of us can fucking stand him, right?

MHJ: Right.

DM: He's got to be SOMEWHERE in this though Moose. He'll never let himself be left out of the picture. His ego is too big.

MHJ: And coming from a couple guys here who have pretty big egos, that's saying something.

DM: Moose, obviously, we've had our problems, although I count the grill and the coffee pot as "good times", cause that's kinda fun.

MHJ: You're not wrong.

DM: And God knows, when it gets down to it; you and I are gonna have to do some epic shit to blow this thing off.

MHJ: Why do you hate kayfabe so much?

DM: Sorry.

MHJ: But, you're probably right.

DM: He's got to go somewhere Moose. Obviously, he's probably a better fit with Bennett.

MHJ: Why Obviously?

DM: Dude, are you kidding?

MHJ: I hate him.

DM: Everyone hates him. Too bad. His sister's actually nice.

MHJ: I wouldn't know; the sight of me freaks her out.

DM: Well, that happens a lot, doesn't it?

MHJ: Kinda, yeah.

DM: He conspired with O'Mac to take my title. That's true. But he gave Eric the title. Why? Why would he do that? Moose. He's got something bigger in mind. Obviously, he fits in better with your people than with mine. Tentatively, can't we cede him to Bennett for the time being.

MHJ: Well. I was thinking more along the lines of teaching him a lesson...

DM: I'm listening...

*fade*

[mooseheadjack]

"Well, someone's got his crankypants on today." Capellan rolls his eyes as he takes his leave of Davin Moreland.

"Capellan!" It's SFJ# ... actually, no, it's Alexis Darling.

"Uh ..." Capellan looks surprised, "Yeah?"

"I couldn't help but overhear what you said to Moreland. You haven't chosen a side yet, have you?"

"..." Capellan is silent for a moment before finally answering, "No. Honestly, all this political stuff makes my head hurt. I just want to come here, wrestle, win titles, and support the taxi drivers of our fine nation."

"How come taxi drivers isn't bolded?"

"What?"

"Endorsement deals have to be bolded."

"It's not an endorsement deal. I just like cabs."

"... right." Alexis is clearly having second thoughts about talking to this crazy man. "Anyway, you haven't chosen a side, and neither has DEA. I wanted to suggest to you that we pool our resources and market ourselves to both sides as a unit."

"You want me to join DEA?" Capellan looks shocked.

"No ... I don't think you'd fit." Alexis waves off that suggestion. "I'm just suggesting some collective bargaining. The more of us there are, the more we can get in exchange for our support."

"So you'd just sign on with the highest bidder?"

"Not necessarily. But we would make sure we got the highest possible bids out of both sides."

"Sounds pretty mercenary."

"I prefer 'smart'."

"You say potato -"

"- and you should too."

"Sorry, Ms Darling." Capellan shakes his head. "But I'm not wired that way. When I get involved in this thing ... though I really still don't understand what it is I am supposed to do, when I do ... it'll be on Rick's side."

"So what was all that with Moreland about the triple threat helping you decide?"

"Hey, I still want to win that match. Throwing a few doubts in his head can't hurt."

"... that seems remarkably heelish for you."

"I'm a decent guy, but that doesn't mean I'm a saint."

"But in the end you see this thing with Rick and Bennett as good vs evil, and you're siding with good?"

"No ... more like I see this thing with Rick and Bennett as being one of Moose's games. And in those, the opposing team is always the right place to be."

[mooseheadjack]

(CTG is leaving a gym not far from his next house show location when his phone rings)

CTG: Hello?

??: Crete? I was wondering if you have a minute

CTG: Sure, who's this?

??: It's Capellan. Hope I'm not catching you-

CTG: Nope, only the Ninja cameraman here. What's up?

Cap: well, things are really starting to go to hell down here. lots of talk of who wants to work under who for what. The Rick is pretty close to losing his mind down here.

CTG: Budget concerns? employee mutiny? Losing his website?

Cap: worse than that. Some kinda power struggle at the top. I know you'd back Rick if he asked but right now I'm not sure where his head's at.

CTG: I'm sorry to hear that. Make sure you remind everyone that Rick is usually honest with us in any matter.

Cap: Not the way Moose tells it

CTG: Moose will never be happy. I left the league in good hands, and I think you guys can handle it.

Cap: I just wish it wasn't this messy. I'll be in touch.

CTG: (as he hangs up the phone) I don't think he's ever called me before.....

[mooseheadjack]

After the quietest limo ride to airport, flight, and ride from airport to arena and hotel, the members of DEA are getting settled into their locker rooms and luxury suites. Alexander Darling and Eric O' Mac are in the main area of the DEA suites.

EoM: Man that flight was brutal. How long you think the silent treatment is going to last?

AD: Hopefully for a while. I'm enjoying the peace and quiet.

EoM: Are you serious? If Alexis and Firewoman could kill with their eyes, they'd both be dead. And after that plane experience, I'm not sure they can't kill each other that way.

AD: Eh, you know what they say about "two women in the same house. And one of them a redhead." [1]

The two men laugh. Lucky arrives, and puts the sign saying "Firewoman's Locker Room" on her door.

EoM: Hey! Who are you?

L: Eugeni...er, Lucky. I'm Firewoman's assistant.

EoM: *raises and eyebrow* Oh really.....?

AD: It's not like that.....

Lucky leaves to check out the work out facilities. Firewoman exits her locker room into the main area of the suite, ignoring Alexander and Eric. Alexander signals to Eric to make himself scarce, so Eric does, but stays around the corner to hear. Alexander sees this, and nods his agreement. Alexander thinks for a moment, then changes his body language to be one of care and concern.

AD: So....you gonna stay mad at me forever?

He is met with silence.

AD: This reminds me of Japan. Remember? The promotion wouldn't let any of us fly home for the holidays? Alexis wouldn't talk to anyone for weeks.

FW: Best weeks of my life.

AD: Heh. And you didn't even know her well then.

This is not the same thing, Firewoman. That was a crappy organization, they didn't care about their wrestlers, just about making money off of us. Poe kept us fighting each other in and out of the ring so that we didn't have any power or anything to challenge them. He played us off one another and got rich off our blood and sweat, while we stayed in hovels.

But this isn't like that, Fire. DEA is a team, and we work together to benefit both the players and the team. Some times, that means the team itself makes sacrifices, but sometimes that means the individuals might have to make some sacrifices too. It's all part of belonging to something. We didn't belong to anythng in Japan. But we belong....you belong now. Heck, we're more than just a team, Fire. I wouldn't say this if any of the guys were listening, but we're really more like a family.

FW: You and Alexis are family.

AD: Sure, by blood. But we've brought you in to be a part of our family. I know being part of a family is a foreign idea for you... Yes, I know yours wasn't the greatest, Alexis told me. But we can be that family for you, we can give you a place to belong. We just ask you give a little in return.

FW: Fine. What do you want.

AD: Well, you're here and that shows you really do want to belong, and be a part of something great. I want to thank you for that.

FW: Um...you're welcome.

AD: No problem. Now, where are you off to?

FW: Oh, I was going to go work out. Maybe see if I run into The Dead. It may be a good idea to talk with him before my triple threat.

AD: Well, that's a good idea, but be careful. Remember, he's not part of our family, and the time may come when you two are on opposite sides.

FW: I know.

AD: Well, have a good work out.

Firewoman leaves, noticeably less angry. Alexander's body language shifts back his normal self, and he smiles.

AD: That was easier than I thought it would be....

[1] Paraphrased from the movie The Quiet Man. Go watch it NOW!

[mooseheadjack]

[The Dead is WALKING~! down the hall when he bumps into Firewoman.]

Dead: Just the person The Dead wanted to see.

Fire: Same here. You wanna do a little training before the Triple Threat match?

Dead: Why not?

[The Dead and Firewoman head to the gym and begin sparring.]

Fire: That cheating bastard...

[Fire locks in a hammer lock on The Dead.]

Dead: MacCappington? He is pretty worthless...

[The Dead reverses into a wrist lock.]

Dead: So, have you given any more thought to what we talked about?

[Firewoman flips out of the wristlock.]

Fire: Not yet.

[Firewoman attempts a leg sweep, but The Dead jumps it.]

Dead: Really? This is important.

[The Dead attempts a German suplex, but Firewoman flips out of it and lands on her feet.]

Fire: Well, I talked to Alex and he...

[Firewoman attempts a reverse DDT, but The Dead flips around into his own reverse DDT.]

Fire: ...he seems to be more genuine lately.

[Firewoman escapes the reverse DDT attempt and shoves The Dead into the ropes.]

Dead: Darling? Genuine? Bullshit.

[Firewoman attempts a clothesline, but The Dead ducks it.]

Fire: I just don't know...

[The Dead springs off the ropes and attempts a flipping neckbreaker. Firewoman ducks and The Dead lands on his feet.]

Fire: I want to believe him.

[The Dead whips Firewoman toward the corner.]

Dead: And The Dead wants to believe that he should be Onslaught or IC champ now, but some things just don't work out.

[The Dead charges in after Firewoman, but Fire pushes off the top rope and launches herself over The Dead.]

Fire: I can't make this decision right now...

[Firewoman charges at The Dead, but The Dead runs up the turnbuckle and does a backflip over Firewoman.]

Dead: Well, you're gonna have to make it soon, regardless of what the incest twins say.

[The Dead and Firewoman square off in the middle of the ring for a moment before stopping and shaking hands.]

Dead: Nice.

Fire: You're not too bad yourself.

Dead: There is no way in hell MacCappington retains this week.

Fire: That's for damn sure. It would not sparkle with me if he cheated his way to another victory.

Dead: You said it.

[The Dead and Firewoman head out of the gym and make their way to their respective locker rooms.]

[mooseheadjack]

(The Midnight Sons are signing autographs at a pet adoption in Sparta. A familiar looking woman is sitting at Spin's side - the former Sugar, now brunette - and several younger members of the Magnusson clan are talking to their big brother. Spin is drinking a Double Bastard Ale as the team happily signs autographs, poses for pictures, and takes donations.)

Spin Hansen: I'm sorry that I haven't been coming out here to these with you, Mags. We're a team, and dammit, I need to be better at the whole team thing.

D.H. Magnusson: Eh, don't worry about it, Spin. I'm just glad that you came out here an' are willin' to help out.

Sugar: And thanks for bringing me out here, Spin. I've been wanting to meet D.H.'s family for a long time. Are we still on for dinner tonight?

DHM: Of course.

(One of the many SFJs approaches the table.)

SFJ: I'm here with the Midnight Sons and... some people.

DHM: Some people, Shannon? This is my FAMILY. Give 'em some respect.

SH: Seriously. What do you want?

SFJ: Your thoughts on your upcoming Number One Contenders match and your decision to do what the fans want you to do.

DHM: We ain't talking unless you donate, Shannon. We're doin' this for the animals an' for those same fans. It ain't like the animals can easily get outta bad situations themselves. They need people to help 'em.

(Underdawg appears in a puff of smoke.)

UD: I don't get out of bad situations. I CAUSE them.

SH: OK, except the Big Dawg here.

(Spin and Underdawg nod at each other and UD disappears in another puff of smoke.)

SFJ: Oh... kay. I'm a little short on cash right now...

SH: Then you get one sound bite from us. IHOP... Heels... McNasty and Wrath... bring your A-Game to Mayhem. We're bringing ours. And there's not a damn thing that you can do about it.

DHM: Come back with a donation, Shannon. THEN we'll talk.

[mooseheadjack]

Camera fades in to backstage locker room; Seamus and Damon are laughing and drinking…

Damon: “Hahaha….woo that was fun!”

Seamus: “Yeah people need to take notice, I don’t care win or lose, we will be a team that needs to be dealt with”

Damon:” Throw the welcome matt out and the shingle up…The BAD boys are here!”

Seamus: “Tell me again what does BAD stand for?”

Damon: “Bad Ass Drinkers”

Seamus: “Huh”

Damon: “Don’t like it?”

Seamus: “Mmmm to quote an old flame, it doesn’t sparkle with me…”

Damon: “Oh come on, it’s like a tribute to APA, you know kicking ass, drinking beer, playing poker”

Seamus: “I don’t know, it seems forced, besides shouldn’t it be BADA, or something?”

Damon: “Well let’s hit the bar and we can talk about it”

Seamus: “No can do, I gotta go check on something”

Damon: “You’re playing with fire”

Seamus: “No most definitely not playing with Fire…I just got the rash cleared up”

Camera cuts to hand knocking on hotel door

Seamus: “Knock, knock.”

Voice on other side of door: “Go away; Alex will kill you if he finds you here?”

Seamus: “Then let me in so he doesn’t see me”

Voice: “What are you dense or crazy?”

Seamus: “Yes!”

Voice” “ Aaahhh, go away”
Seamus: “Look, I just thought maybe we could talk, not many people share the craziness of the life we lead, forget about DEA, Firebitch, the madness of OOWF and just talk as real people.”

Door opens

Alexis: “Why should I trust you?”

Seamus: “Why shouldn’t you, what do you know about me?”

Camera fades to rumpled bed at dawn with to figures obscured beneath the blankets, suddenly two heads pop out

Alexis: “What do I do if Alex finds out?”

Seamus: “Tell him to pound salt. He doesn’t own you and your old enough to make your own decisions.”

Alexis: “What about the others…Firewoman….”

Seamus: “Fuck em all, this is between you and me, it’s no ones business what we do.”

Alexis: “On no, what have I done…what has come over me?”

Seamus: “It must have been me lucky charms”

Alexis disappears back down under the blanket

Alexis: “They’re magically delicious”

A big smile spreads across Seamus’ face and camera fades to black

[mooseheadjack]

*Inside The DEA Luxury Suite*

The camera fades in and we see Alexis Darling sitting on the couch with her laptop slowly falling down towards the floor...

Alexis Darling: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Firewoman and Alexander rush into the room...

Firewoman: What the hell was that?

Alexander Darling: Is everything okay Lexie? Did something happen?

Alexis: Huh...no, just the worst fucking nightmare possible. I thought I had nightmares before...but my gawd this was disgusting.

Firewoman: What was it?

Alexis: I'd rather not...it's just...

Alexander: Just spit it out.

Alexis: Well, ummm. It's kinda about your ex Fire.

Firewoman: Seamus? Why are you...

Alexis: Cause he's been saying stuff and sending me things and now I'm having nightmares of his nasty hands all over me...no offense. He's just so not my type.

Firewoman: He's been doing what with you?

Alexis: Just making comments...really.

Firewoman: Lex...don't lie to me.

Alexis: Ugh, fine...he, god I'm gonna be ill. He kissed me once smelling like rotten beer. And he sent flowers to the last show, but we got rid of them before you showed up.

Firewoman: He's a dead man. This so totally doesn't fucking sparkle with me.

Alexis: You're not mad at me?

Firewoman: About this, not at all. I know more than well what he's like and soon enough he'll know exactly what the term "Vengeance Hath No Fury Like a Firewoman."

Firewoman then storms out of the locker room.

Alexander: Josh, follow her. Make sure nothing happens to her. And if you can kick some Irish jobber ass for me.

The scene fades out as Alexander takes a seat next to Alexis and starts rubbing her shoulders to try and relieve some of her stress.

*Fade to Black*

[mooseheadjack]

*Davin Moreland is sitting in a Hotel owned by Starwood Hotels. There's a knockety-knock on the door. Who could it be? Who? Who?!?!?! He checks the peephole thingy and opens the door*

DM: Why are you here?

Phantos: Just...just come back, would ya?

DM: No, I'm totally all set. He wants me out of my own locker room? Fine. I so don't need this right now.

P: Just go talk to him.

DM: YOU go talk to him. I'm through talking. It's fuckin' go time.

P: Davin, you don't mean that.

DM: Of course I mean that. Why wouldn't I mean that? Besides. I know he didn't send you here.

P: How do you know?

DM: Cause I know.

P: You're right.

DM: Fine. You tell Lucios he owes me a fucking apology - you can leave the "fucking" part out - otherwise, we're gonna go at Mayhem.

P: Fine. I'll tell him.

DM: All right. What are you up to?

P: Oh, I'm gonna hook up with a girl from downstairs.

DM: *dubious* Which one?

P: The one near the wall.

DM: Dude, she's like 80. I don't even know if she's alive.

P: So?

*he leaves*

*Davin sighs and goes back to work on his laptop*

*fade*

[mooseheadjack]

*Blitz and Voltage are practicing in the gym. Voltage hits a superplex off the top rope. Blitz gets up without showing any pain or emotion, and suplexes Voltage. He hits a moonsault off the top rope. He tries to land a superkick, but Voltage reverses it into a sharpshooter. They continue this for a while, showing almost no sign of life but continuing to put on an incredible wrestling match. It culminates with Blitz powerbombing Volt off a ladder through a table, barbed wire table, flaming table, glass table, thumbtack table and a flaming barb-wire thumbtack filled table. Voltage shakily gets to his feet, but miraculously seems to be alright.

SFJ#999 (that’s what you get when you don’t promo for months) enters the gym. She approaches the 2 men.*

SFJ#999: I’m standing by with Blitz and Voltage, 2 men we haven’t heard much from lately.

V: Holy motherfucking shit we’re in a promo.

SFJ#999: Well, I am interviewing you.

B: Where are we? Why is Voltage my partner? Holy shit, Voltage, you’re on fire!

*Voltage screams in pain, and a few medical guys spray him with a fire extinguisher and examine him to see if he’s okay.*

SFJ#999: So were you 2 guys invincible to pain or something while you weren’t in promos?

B: Seriously, what’s going on? I need to go watch OOWF TV to find out just how I got here.

SFJ#999: OOWF TV’s archives aren’t available anymore for some reason. And why do you have teeth again? And aren’t you dead?

B: Why wouldn’t I have teeth? And why would I be dead? But why don’t you have the archives?

SFJ#999: Okay fine, here’s a tape of last weeks show.

*Tape of Blitz vs. Nerve Agent plays. Voltage gets bandaged up and joins the 2 of them in watching the match. Blitz yawns during the match and asks “how long is this going to take?”

V: That has to be one of the shortest squashes ever.

B: Huh?

SFJ#999: Whatever. Now for this interview to continue, I need to know whether you 2 are faces or heels?

B: Who are we facing this week?

SFJ#999: The OOWF Tag Team Champions.

B: This week at Mayhem, we’ll defeat The Defene… Voltage, aren’t you 2 the champs anymore? Why are you teaming with me?

V: Beats me.

B: Anyway, we’ll beat the champs to win the titles.

*Crowd boos.*

SFJ#999: The champs are faces, guys.

[OOC: Are they? I am way behind, and apparently Run DLP exploded~! But for the sake of my promo they are.]

B: Wait, I mean: I love Sparta!

[OOC: Damn it, I should have cut this promo last week.]

*Crowd cheers.*

V: Hey, does that mean we’re faces?

B: I guess it does.

V: Woo! I’m the gnarliest double champ ever~!

[mooseheadjack]

Phantos returns from his conquest and enters the Run DLP Aquafina Locker Room He finds Lucios finishing off his Number 9 Steak and Cheese from D'Angelos

Phantos: Hey Luc! You Gotta go talk to Davin

Lucios: I don't have to do anything.

Phantos: Come on man, you cant go throwing him out of the Locker Room!

Lucios: I don't have a clear memory of doing that.

Phantos: But Davin said...

Lucios: Listen, Davin's a big boy. He has his hands full right now with AGM duties as well as his wrestling career. I didn't change the locks. He'll come back when HE wants to. And we'll still have his back... 100%

Phantos: Man, It's just not the same without him.

Lucios: Hook up the Sony Playstation 3 and plau some Guitar Hero. You haven't done that in a while. I'm done watching tape.

Phantos: Already?

Lucios: Blitz and Voltage are a first time team. We only drew them beacuse Rick wanted the Tag Team Turmoil match to include the entire Tag Division. Voltage is a former champ, but Ecosystem had to carry him, especially towards the end of their run. Blitz just jobbed to Nerve Agent of all people. There is no chance on earth we lose.

(A Randomly Numbered Sexy Female Journalist walks in the door, cameraman in tow. )

RNSFJ: Sorry to interrupt guys, but We need your thoughts on the Tag Team Turmoil match this week. THe winner there gets a shot at Your Tag Team Ti...

Lucios: Championships

RNSFJ: Tag Team Championships next week. Anyone you want to see win?

Phantos: The best team. Lucios and I want to defend our titles aganist any team that earns an opportunity.

Lucios: You see Miss, this is how things go when you have true competition. Put the topp tag teams in the company together and let the best team win. This championship opportunity will go to the most deserving team. Personally, I think The Midnight Sons have an edge, but in a mulit-person event, anything can happen.

RNSFJ: You LIKE the fact that it is a Turmoil match?

Lucios: Not particularly, But with so many contenders, Rick had no other choice.

(The RNSFJ leaves. Phantos goes over to the Sony MultiMedia Center and hooks up his game. Lucios take his Sprint PCS Phone and starts texting.... and we fade to black)

[mooseheadjack]

[As The Dead is walking back to his locker room after his sparring session with Firewoman he sees Bunny hopping and flipping his way through the halls. He watches Bunny for a moment before approaching him.]

Bunny: Yo, what the fuck? You tryin' to jump me from behind?

Dead: Relax...

Bunny: No foo', you relax.

Dead: Fine. The Dead is relaxed.

Bunny: ...Good.

Dead: Anyway, The Dead has an offer for you.

Bunny: I'm listenin'...

Dead: Join Bennett.

Bunny: That's your offer? Shit, I'm already kickin' it with Rick.

Dead: But there are things Bennett can offer you.

Bunny: I've already got another title match, what the hell can that fool do for me?

Dead: A few things. But first, did you notice Blitz is back?

Bunny: That sorry ass bitch?

Dead: The very same. Anyway, it looks like he'll be joining Rick soon. And you know what that means...

Bunny: What?

Dead: Rick will team you two up.

Bunny: Aw hells no!

Dead: Hells yes. You sure you want to stick around for that?

Bunny: What about Bennett? What kind of deal can I get?

Dead: Here's the deal. The moment The Dead wins a title, you get first crack.

Bunny: You can do that?

Dead: Bennett can do whatever he wants. He's already shut down most of Rick's operation.

Bunny: True 'dat.

Dead: And he'll want the title to stay on our side, so it's a win for everyone.

Bunny: Word?

Dead: Word. Think about it.

[The Dead walks away, leaving Bunny to make a decision.]

[mooseheadjack]

Moose is watching a monitor in a corridor when he's approached by the Lovely and Talented Dorothy Mantooth. Before he can say a word, she hands him a DVD and walks away. Moose puts the DVD into the player under the monitor and hits PLAY. A low-quality security video appears on the screen. The date stamp is 12/03/08, 4:13 PM – Wednesday. The screen shows a fuzzy image of Skurge walking around an otherwise abandoned arena. He wears a puzzled expression...

Skurge: Where the sweet fuck is everyone? I haven’t seen a single person all day. This is fucking creepy. I don’t even know where SYB and the Lovely and Talented Dorothy Mantooth are. My own fucking team, eh? Man, if this is some kind of rookie hazing, they really went all oot. There’s no way that can be it, though. Not on gameday.

*Skurge passes by GM the Rick’s office. He pauses to think for a minute, then turns toward the door…

Skurge: Fuck it. There’s no one around. I’m going through his desk. Who knows what useful shit he might have left in there?

*Skurge starts rifling through GMtR’s desk. It’s not long before he comes across a folder labeled “PHWF”…

Skurge: I believe this is exactly what I’m looking for. I never figured it’d be this easy to get my hands on it. I didn’t even have to use any of my plans to get Rick oot of his office. This is great, eh?

*With that, the screen goes to static. The Lovely and Talented Dorothy Mantooth has clearly shown Moose all that she's willing to show...for now.

[mooseheadjack]

Moosehead Jack runs into Viper in the hallway.

MHJ: Good job last week against Darling.

DV: That was fun.

MHJ: Well looks like you're going to have some more fun this week, since you've got him again.

DV: It'll be even worse for him this week. As it will be for you.

MHJ: Excuse me?

DV: Well, it looks like your civil war is already over.

MHJ: Why do you say that?

DV: GM The Rick. He just went up and disappeared. He's gone. Bennett's already won.

MHJ: Not in the slightest. We don't need the Rick to win this war.

DV: What is this "we" shit? What is this "war" even about anymore?

MHJ: It's about control.

DV: And Rick's lost that control. He tucked tail and split. What are you even representing anymore?

MHJ: Viper, trust me.

DV: I've been here since the day you've been here, Moose. I know the irony of your catchphrase.

MHJ: Listen.

DV: No, YOU listen. Look at where we're at. We're not even IN OO anymore.

MHJ: Huh?

DV: We're posting OOWF promos in Puns House. As in Puns House Wrestling Federation.

MHJ: What the fuck are you talking about?

DV: Jesus CHRIST, Moose! Look at your monitor! It's the not the ugly brown and red colors anymore! We can have pictures as signatures! We can even..

[mooseheadjack]

DV: Double post without ModPrime giving us shit!

MHJ: Are you fucking out of your mind? I have absolutely NO idea what you're talking about? What have you been smoking?

DV: Are you serious? Are you really pretending that this pretend fed that we just do on this computer is reality right now?

MHJ: Viper.... I think you need to get of the shrooms and get back into reality, ok? Now concentrate on Darling this week. If you don't want to talk about the war, FINE. Just don't insult my intelligence with this "we're just typing this in a server that's in a different forum" shit anymore, ok? This is WRESTLING. This is REALITY. Not some online fantasy shit, ok?

DV: ok... you're right... sorry. This new environment is really fucking with my head. It feels like I'm on an alternate plane right now.

MHJ: I understand. Since Rick left, we lost a lot of the OOWF set and cameras and are now using PHWF's gear and studio.

DV: What's PHWF?

MHJ: Oh, come off of it, Viper. You used to be here.

DV: Uh, no I didn't.

MHJ: Oh shut up. Everybody knows you were playing the Viet Cong Viper character. And come to think of it, that's probably why you're so hesitant to join Bennett despite the fact you hate Rick. Because Bennett made you do that offensive vietnamese gimmick. You're only a quarter vietnamese!

DV: Moose. I have no idea what you're talking about.

MHJ: Ok, we're not doing this micro-kayfabe shit again, ok?

DV: No seriously. I don't know what you're talking about.

MHJ: Ok, fine. Go fuck yourself.

Moosehead Jack leaves.

DV: I think he's out of his mind.

VCV: Ya.

DV: Um, who are you?

VCV: I yo long loss cousin from vietnam! Viet Cong Vipah!

DV: What the fuck?

VCV: No da fuck! Me! Vipah! Vipah! We have same fawtha!

DV: What. The. Fuck.

[mooseheadjack]

<Moosehead Jack is wandering the Halls of the Sparta Arena when SFJ13 stops him>


SFJ13: Moose, can I have a word with you?

MHJ: I guess

SFJ13: Is the war over?

MHJ: Is it over? Does this look like the Anglo-Zanzibar war?

SFJ13: Huh?

MHJ: It was the shortest war in recorded history. Anyway, never mind. Look, I don’t know what has happened to Rick, and quite honestly, I don’t care. He still has foot soldiers ready to carry the banner into war. I have no doubt that while he may be gone, he is still giving orders. After all, Stank did suggest that he take some time off.

SFJ13: So you think this is all an intentional absence?

MHJ: Of course it is. It was planned to throw Bennett and his men off. The moment we relax, he comes back and gains the upper hand, not going to happen.

SFJ13: So you suspect that Davin Moreland is now calling the shots?

MHJ: At the moment, probably

SFJ13: You and Davin recently came to some sort of agreement, would you care to shed any light on that?

MHJ: Not at the moment. We have a common enemy, one that needs to be taught a lesson, its really as simple as that.

SFJ13: And your recent discussions with Donovan Viper?

MHJ: Essentially the same thing. Though Viper, pull it together man.

SFJ13: Everyone assumes you are talking about Alexander Darling, a man that viciously attacked you and carved his name in your chest.

MHJ: Perhaps. Look, all I can say is this, I told Eric and Bennett I would not touch him until the time was right. I have lived up to my word.

SFJ13: Skurge and Dorothy Mantooth seemed to have uncovered something interesting in GM the Rick's office, would you care to share anything with us?

MHJ: I know just what you know right now, but Skurge and Mantooth, we would be more than happy to arrange a meeting with you so you can divulge your information further. There could certainly be a place for IHOP in Bennett's army.

SFJ13: Even SYB?

MHJ: I give him some credit, he is improving, siding with us can only help his chances.

SFJ13: Fair enough, what about “The Main Event” Chris Cole?

MHJ: Cole. I have to say I am rather disappointed in Cole. It seems like he is a shell of his former self. I was expecting a war with him, but he really doesn’t have it. Maybe he knows that he backed the wrong horse in GM the Rick and his heart is just not in it. Can’t say I would blame him either. This week Cole, I finish you off, once and for all. And when I do, I am going to make it my mission to find GM the Rick, wherever he is, and drive the final nail into his coffin.

SFJ13: The Midnight Sons recently decided that they would remain neutral and thus keep Drink & Destroy intact as a neutral entity, what are your feelings on that?

MHJ: Well, I would be lying if I said I wasn’t disappointed that they didn’t side with us, but then again, they didn’t side with Rick either, so all is not lost. My advice to them is this, watch things carefully. A neutral country gets no choices in the spoils of war.

<with that Moose walks away leaving SFJ13 looking confused>

[mooseheadjack]

Stank is asleep in his hotel room when he is awakened by a strange voice.

Stank - ..huh? Wha... who's there?

Stank sits up in his bed and rubs his eyes and he hears a rustling coming from the bathroom. He rises out of bed, walks over to the bathroom, opens the door and standing there is... Bunny.

Stank - What the... Bunny!?! What the fuck are you doing in my bathroom!?!

Bunny - OO... Deus ex machina ... OO

Stank - You sound weird... are you drunk? You've changed your rabbit suit.

Bunny motions for Stank to follow him out of the room. For some reason Stank complies. Bunny leads him outside the hotel, turns and stands before the confused OOWF World Champ.

Stank - What the fuck are we doing out here?

Bunny - OO will end in 26 days, 6 hours, 42 minutes, and 12 seconds.

Stank - ... okay you ARE drunk. I'm going back to my roo- Whoa!

Stank looks up and sees a commercial jet engine FALLING~! out of the sky and CRASHING~! through the roof of the two story Hotel building. Stank races to his room and finds that the jet engine has smashed into the bed he was just sleeping in.

Stank - HOLY SHIT!!

Later in the Destroyitarium

Stank - I went to sleep and everything was fine. I wake up and I find Bunny in my hotel room, a fucking jet engine comes crashing onto my bed and now... EVERYTHING seems off!

OBJ - Well... Rick is missing.

Stank - What do you mean missing?

OBJ - No one has seen him in days.

Stank - Hmmm... maybe he took some time off like I suggested.

Stank and Outback Jack reflect on that for a second while drinking their beers.

Stank - ... SERIOUSLY dude! Does EVERYTHING seem WEIRD to you now?

OBJ - Like what?

Stank - I don't know... everything seems... brighter.

OBJ - Brighter?

Stank - No... more white. Yeah... white is a better description.

OBJ - White? The bartender's black. There's a black couple sitting over there in the corner. Hightower is over there reading a book.

Stank - No... I don't mean white like THAT, moron.

OBJ - Well what are you talking about?

Stank - I don't fucking know... I think Bunny has got me spooked. He said something to me last night that was- .. hey... is that Jack Evans over by the pool table?

OBJ - Where? Oh Yeah... that is him.

Stank - ... What's up with his eye?

Spin Hansen, who has been standing within earshot, walks over.

Spin - Mags jammed him in the eye with his pool stick. Evans tried to cheat.

Stank - ... okay.

Stank turns back to his drink, but mid-swing he sees a water tentacle snake out of Spin's chest and flow over to the pool table, seconds before Spin walks over there.

Stank - Jack... I'm telling you I'm losing it.

[mooseheadjack]

<Moosehead Jack walks into the Destroyitarium and sits next to Stank and orders a drink, but as he speaks, the words don't match his mouth>

Stank: Why the fuck are you doing that?

MHJ: Doing what?

Stank: Seriously, STOP IT!

MHJ: Stank, I have no idea what you are talking about

Stank: Your words. They don't match the way your mouth is moving! Knock it off!

<Moose slowly turns to Stank and looks at him, and there is blood pouring off his face, he blinks once and his eyes are yellow, then he blinks again and they are normal, and all the blood is gone>

Stank: That's it, I am moving.

<Stank turns around in his seat and looks in one corner and Morte is sitting in one corner, his face painted like a skeleton, he motions Stank over ominously. Stank ignores him and looks out the large plate glass window and sees Bunny standing in the pouring rain outside. After a few seconds, the rain turns to blood, soaking his white bunny suit. Stank reaches up and rubs his eyes, and when he looks back, Bunny is gone and the sky is clear and the ground is dry>

Stank: What the fuck is going on here?

[mooseheadjack]

<Bunny walks into the Destroyitarium and sees Stank staring out the window.>

Bunny: What up, Stank?

Stank: Get the fuck away from me, you freak.

Bunny: Freak? What's up with you? I never fucked with you, why would you fuck with me? Knowing I could rap circles around you. What, you nuts as me?

Stank: You DID fuck with me!

Bunny: I did no such thing. Now if you would just let me finish this verse...

Stank: First you drag me out of my bed...

Bunny: Plus I can sing better than you and I don't fuckin sing. And prolly play guitar better, and I ain't never touched a string...

Stank: You tell me the OOWF is dying or some shit. A jet crashes into my bed...

Bunny: But I ain't mad at you, I'd hate me too if I was you. I'm what you used to be, shit you was me in '92...

Stank: Some more shit happens, then I glance out this window and see you standing in a blood-rain...

Bunny: So everytime I write a lyric, I'mma think of you. And maybe that'll help me know what it's like... to sing the bluuuueeeesss...

Stank: And now you won't shut the fuck up and quit singing that damn Shady shit!

Bunny: So reach in your billfolds, for ten ducats. And pick up this Slim Shady shit that's on Rawkus...

Stank: I think that's enough...

Bunny: Somethin' somethin' somethin', somethin' I get weeded. My daughter scribbled over that rhyme, I couldn't read it.

Stank: You have a daughter?

<Stank vision>

Bunny: She's right over there.

<Bunny motions towards a corner. Stank looks and sees a 5 year old girl hanging by a noose. Her eyes open and dart across the room until they stop on Stank, staring into his eyes. Her mouth moves, but all Stank can hear are distorted whispers. The rope breaks and the little girl drops to the floor and crawls towards Stank, leaving a trail of blood across the floor.>

Stank: Get away!

<End Stank vision>

Bunny: No, but Eminem does.

Stank: Stop it!

Bunny: I've stopped rapping, man. It's cool.

Stank: Where'd it go?

<We see nothing but a pile of wrestling rope in the corner of the room.>

Stank: I'm losing it, Bunny. I'm sorry.

<Stank vision>

<Bunny sticks out his tongue and it has a razor blade on it. He grabs the blade and slices at his tongue, until it's dripping blood onto his bunny suit. He takes the razor and begins slicing his wrist with it, letting the blood pour onto the floor. Stank looks around the room nervously, before turning back to Bunny. Bunny is standing there, no razor, no blood. Just staring at Stank with a confused look.>

<End Stank vision>

Bunny: You're freaking me out a little. I'mma hop up out of this joint.

<Bunny leaves Stank alone.>