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Post by mooseheadjack on Oct 6, 2008 17:10:42 GMT -5
OOWF MidWeek Mayhem/Imperial Onslaught 2008 Live! From Springfield, Indiana
Imperial Onslaught[/u] Winner Gets a Guaranteed Title Shot
Tournament of Champions[/u] Phantos vs. Seamus McNasty Lucios vs. DH Magnusson Winner vs. Winner
OOWF World Heavyweight Title Match[/u] Davin Moreland vs. Tournament Winner
Card subject to dreams of delusion
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Post by mooseheadjack on Oct 6, 2008 17:11:07 GMT -5
*Sometime after the PPV. The party has ended, the Run DEA Suites are a shambles. Davin & Lucios find themselves sitting together on the balcony, still wearing their championships.
Lucios: You realize it's been barely a year since we joined forces?
Davin. Amazing. And Now look at us. On Top
Lucios Right where we belong.
*Phantos wanders out the the balcony. His mask all askew and untied. he too, is wearing his championship.
Phantos: Hey Guys! What a night!
Lucios: Gentlemen, let history reflect This night as the greatest in wrestling history.
Phantos *Clink*
Davin: *Clink*
Lucios *Clink*
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Post by mooseheadjack on Oct 6, 2008 17:11:27 GMT -5
In the Locker room of Lost Security Deposits:
D.H. Magnusson: It ain't about titles. It ain't about winnin'. This week...Imperial Onslaught...It ain't about the OOWF. It's about men. It's about men bein' men. An' it's about men doing things th' way men do.
DHM: Y'see, I got a good friend in th' other room. A guy who gave me a shot t'prove myself, I guy that gave me a place around here. I owe him a lot. We don't talk about it much, we don't even bring it up t'each other...because we're men. That's th' way we do things. We know what we expect from each other, and we know what we can depend on from each other. Men...REAL men know those kinda things.
DHM: And that friend a'mine...That MAN...He's getting patched up by a Doc right now because some bald sack a'crap and his cronies forgot what it means t'be men.
*DHM begins pacing around the room*
DHM: I hope Seamus loses. Nothin' against him, but I hope he loses. I NEED him t'lose. 'Cause if he loses, that means I get all three of 'em. Phantos, Lucios...And that sack a'crap Moreland. Y'see...Phantos and Lucios, they kinda suprised me. Been in th' ring with those boys enough times that they had me thinkin' they had a set between th' two of them...But Moreland? Since the day I got here, that dirtball was always playin' at being the bully. For all his talk about Team Unity, for all has talk about doin' things for the good of th' company, deep down inside, he was still that jealous little diva that threw his little temper tantrums anytime he didn't get EXACTLY what we wanted.
DHM: Well, y'got what you wanted, Diva. Ya got your shiny little belt. Ya got everyone's attention. You get t'pretend t'be the center of your little universe. An' ya got me. Lookin' to get a little payback for a friend who who got beat down by a buncha overgrown punks. An' win or lose, I'm gettin' it. Because that's what's men do.
DHM: Ya might wanna take notes.
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Post by mooseheadjack on Oct 6, 2008 17:12:09 GMT -5
Alexis and Samantha Darling head out to the balcony where they catch the original members of Run DLP *clink*ing their title belts. Samantha slowly walks up behind Davin where she wraps her hands around him and squeezes him tight and starts whispering in his ear. Alexis Darling: Gentlemen, it seems like everyone is having a good time.Everyone nods and they all seem to be basking in their accomplishments tonight. Davin: Where are Fire and Alex...they should be out here celebrating with us.Samantha: Fire and Chris are taking some alone time and Alexander is taking care of some loose ends...From inside the suite, we start to hear some loud yelling... You're fucking fired you waste of space. Since you've been here, I've turned into a whining, emo bitch. It's time for that to stop. So take your little LonelyGirl act and get the fuck out of MY suite.LG15: But Alex...after everything...Alexander: After nothing...get the fuck out of my sight before something tragic happens.Suddenly there is a loud bawl and then a door slams. A few moments later Alexander walks outside to the balcony joins everyone. Alexis: Took ya long enough brother dear.Alexander: Bite me sister Darling.The twins give each other a smirk before Alexander puts his arm around his sister.. Seriously, it's good to have you back.Samantha: I thought you were said you were done being an emo-bitch.Alexander: Hey Sam...go fuck yourself.Phantos: HA!From somewhere far, far away... Eric: WHERE THE FUCK IS MY QUARTER???Everyone on the balcony just looks at each other for a moment before moving on. Alexis: Not to be a party pooper...Davin: Yea right.Davin and Alexis look at each other for a moment before both smile and it seems like all past transgressions have been buried. Alexis: Seriously, we need to be going before everyone gets stitched up and comes looking for us.Lucios: Let them...Run DEA is the most powerful force ever seen in the OOWF.Alexis: No doubt, but there's another reason we need to be going. I have another surprise for everyone.Everyone takes one last drink of the champagne before walking through the suites. Firewoman and Jericho come out of her locker room looking a tad bit disheveled before joining the rest of Run DEA. They all make their way down to the parking garage. Alexis: So during the course of my investigation, I was given access to a lot of personal records. Everyone was so trusting for some reason and thanks to some help, I was able to take what I felt was my fair price for putting my life and health at risk. And I figured that we've done this together, so everyone should reap the benefits. First, Fire...something was promised to you a while ago and there it is.Alexis tosses a set of keys to Firewoman who looks up and sees this: Firewoman's eyes get wide as she grabs a hold of Jericho's hand and the two hop on as Alexander walks over and pointedly ignores Chris. Alexander: Remember what I said. If you die...I'll bring you back and kill you. If you only get hurt, I'll finish the job. We'll see you tomorrow for that thing. Be careful.Firewoman: Sure thing Alex...Chris...let's see how fast we can get this baby.Alexander just shakes his head while Alexis moves on. Alexis: Lucios, Phantos...I don't know you too well and some people...Alexis looks right at Davin... MAY think I cost you something before I left. While I respectively disagree, it is obvious how talented you two are and that you truly are the best tag team this company has ever seen. And I KNOW you'll finish the job Alexander and Davin have started when you finally get your hands on Poe. Am I correct, gentlemen?Phantos: Right ya are, ma'am. We are the division killers after all.Lucios: Don't worry bout it Alexis. It'll be taken care of.Alexis just nods and tosses two sets of keys over to the current tag team CHAMPIONS... Phantos and Lucios grab the keys out of mid-air and look up to see the following two trucks side by side: Alexis: Oh and there's a surprise in the cab for each of you.Team Aquafine walks over and opens the door... Phantos: HELLO, Nurse!!!Lucios just smiles as the two men hop up and into their brand new trucks driving off leaving just the 3 Darlings and Davin Moreland standing there. They all stand quietly for a moment and seem to be reflecting on what it took to get to this point. Samantha: We're not going to have some stupid fucking Hallmark moment, are we?The other three just shake their heads and laugh. Davin: So, whatcha get me?Alexis: You think I really got YOU something...after the way you treated me before I left Davin.Davin just stares at her for a moment and it seems to be a staring contest between the two. Samantha: Do they do this a lot?Alexander: All the time. They're both too fucking stubborn to admit the other had points and things are said. It's a pointless exercise.Samantha: So, we just wait.Alexander: It should be ending riiighhhtttt abooouttt noooow...And it does. Alexis tosses Davin a set of keys. Alexis: Davin, you finally got everything you've wanted...what's next?Davin turns and grabs Samantha around the waist... Davin: How's Newark sound?Samantha: How's fucking yourself...literally, sound?Davin: Nice...actually, how's a quick little trip over to Cape Cod and Martha's Vineyard sound?Samantha: Exquisite.Davin and Samantha slowly walk over to the following: Moreland opens the door for Sam before heading around to the driver's door. He nods towards Alexander before getting in and driving off. Alexis: What was that little nod about?Alexander: Just an understanding we reached a few days ago when I was FINALLY informed of everything.Alexis: I couldn't tell you...Alexander: And why not...and don't even try telling ME to fuck myself sister.Alexis: Because I thought you had changed. I thought maybe I had. It wasn't until Sam called me and told me about the bounty that I realized we forgot who we are and that it took Davin to remind us what was important.Alexander: And what's that?Alexis: Money and power, brother dear, power and money.The two Darlings get that evil, psychotic smirk as they slowly begin walking towards the last car: Alexander: Nice car.Alexis: Figured you would like it. You do realize there will be a lot of people gunning for us, especially you and Davin since you're well you and Davin has the belt.Alexander: Let them. We've handled worse. Let Stank, Let Capslock, Let any of them come after us.
We are Run DEA. Try and stop us.
BOOYAH, Bitches!!!
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Post by mooseheadjack on Oct 6, 2008 17:12:47 GMT -5
<SFJ#2 peeks around the corner of the back room where Stank is being tended to by OOWF medical staff. Stank is sitting up on a table as a doctor wraps his knee. Blood can be seen leaking through a bandage over a cut on his forehead from the belt shot he got from the OOWF World Champion. Stank looks up an notices SFJ#2 peeking around the corner. He motions for her to enter and she does so timidly. She lifts up her mic.>
SFJ#2 - Lucas...
Stank - ...
SFJ#2 - ...
Stank - ... Ask your question, Alicia.
SFJ#2 - Are you ok?
Stank - Sure. Just peachy.
SFJ#2 - Really?
Stank - ...
SFJ#2 - Ok... Any comments on the rise to power of Run Dea?
<Stank stares at SFJ#2 for a few uncomfortable seconds.>
Stank - You know... I kind of expected this shit from that jealous bitch, Davin Moreland. I knew that sooner or later he and I were going to have it out. I mean he fucked up my knee, then acted like such a smug prick afterward... well shit like that... there was a receipt and I had every intention on collecting... then tonight he just went and added to the bill, so the cost... the cost will be higher.
That will be fun.
I won't waste further words threatening our new World Champ because he's too stupid to understand what it is he has done. I'm sure he begs to differ and will let us know why in time... or not. Doesn't matter. The cost is the same. Quite frankly, dealing with him is the easy part in all of this.
<Stank stares off to the side. An evil smile slowly makes it's way across Stank's face.>
SFJ#2 - Lucas, with all due respect... you just had defeat snatched from the jaws of victory.
<Stank, maintaining his grin, turns his attention back to SFJ#2>
Stank - Alicia. You're right about that. Because the hard part in all of this is how I should feel about the Darlings. I mean... I can't say the risk that they would betray me didn't play in the back of my mind... but I had hoped...
<Stank stares off to the side once again. The grin tightens and becomes a look of pure rage. That look lasts a few seconds before Stank fixes his face and turns back to SFJ#2>
Stank - I never liked Davin, but I was genuinely fond of the Darlings. It's a damn shame what's about to happen to them. You see, Poe's mistake... his continued delusion... is his image of Alex being "The Boy". No. No. Alex is not a boy. I know what Alex is. I've known what Alex is since he arrived here in the OOWF. My mistake... was thinking that didn't matter in the grand scheme. Clearly it did. So Poe I'm afraid I'm going to have to rob you of your revenge against "The Boy". You never were going to get it anyway. I know what Alex is... and I know how to kill him... and it will be a damn shame.
That will be the hard part.
No mercy for you Alex... none. I think you are smart enough to know what it is you have done... the fact that you don't care, tells me what I've been saying about you all along. You've got a giant set of balls. After you've settled up your bill... you're going to wish all I did was carve my initials in your chest.
Bennett is through and one war ends, as another begins. Run DEA vs Drink and Destroy. It may take a long time, but there is only one way this will end... If you don't know... the shit list is growing... I'm sure 3 Piece Set, The Devil's Brigade, The Heroes Guild, or Smark can tell you... oh wait a minute... they're gone. They're gone and Drink and Destroy is still here... whole again... five men strong.
Guys and dolls... I'll be sure to get word to your next of k-
<Stank looks over SFJ#2's shoulder and spies LD Williams standing in the door. Stank hops off the table and shakes feeling into his knee.>
Stank - Excuse us, Alicia.
SFJ#2 - LD WILLIAMS! Can I ask y-
Stank - I said excuse us, Alicia.
<Stank walks over to the former OOWF World Champion and they exchange words, not picked up by the mics. The two walk into another room as the camera fades.>
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Post by mooseheadjack on Oct 6, 2008 17:13:11 GMT -5
*SFJ#2 backs away from LD Williams and Stank...and nearly bumps into Eric O'Mac.*
SFJ#2: Eric! Can I ask you a few questions?
Eric: No.
*Eric keeps on walking. SFJ#2 pursues.*
SFJ#2: Do you have anything to say about what went down tonight at Hell on Earth?
Eric: I don't have anything to say.
SFJ#2: Really?
Eric: Yes. Really. I said it before the pay-per-view. LJ Bennett was just a figure head. Turns out he was a fraud too. But it doesn't matter. Nothing in this God-forsaken wrestling company matters anymore.
SFJ#2: Thoughts on the Imperial Onslaught match?
Eric: None. If I win, great. If I don't...I still have this.
*Eric opens his jacket to reveal the big gold belt, the PHWF World Championship.*
SFJ#2: Any thoughts regarding Run DEA.
Eric: They made a decision that was best for them. I wish them nothing but the best. The same goes for Drink and Destory. As of right now, they are none of my concern.
SFJ#2: Last question: You said last week that you would rather die than work for Rick Scaia. Is that still true?
Eric: It's still true. Lucky for me, my contract runs out in 3 months. Rick has 3 months to try to keep me.
*Eric walks away.*
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Post by mooseheadjack on Oct 6, 2008 17:13:33 GMT -5
The sound of a screaming engine pierces the early morning sunrise at the OOWF Arena in Springfield. A single headlight appears and gets closer, closer, closer, before it comes into frame. A black Kawasaki Vulcan with custom orange flames paint job comes speeding into view, with two figures aboard, neither wearing one of the two matching helmets that came with it. The bike screeches to a halt outside the arena, and the two dismount. (Dismount the BIKE, you perverts).
Y2J: You are insane.
FW: That was amazing. [Firewoman lights up a cigarette.]
Y2J: Seriously... when you took that one turn, and accelerated rather than--
FW: Oh, hush. What, are you sad you didn't get to fly 3000 miles into the air, or whatever it is, and break your collarbone?
Y2J: No, no. Just... you are insane. And now I need to get to the airport.
FW: Huh? Why?
Y2J: I have a show tonight? In Minneapolis? I have to be there by one...
FW: Easy. Hop on!
Y2J: No, no!!! That's okay! [Firewoman pouts.] It's not that I'm not totally okay with getting on that deathtra--... I mean, fine piece of machinery with you. I've already got the reservations and tickets and stuff. Vince hates it when we change travel plans.
FW: Oh...okay....
Jericho walks away, calling a cab on his cell phone, looking somewhat glad to be alive. Firewoman checks out a few things on her lovely new bike when Sexy Male Journalist #1 comes up.
SMJ1: Firewoman! You are here early!
FW: I haven't slept since Hell on Earth. I was hoping to get to the hotel and crash.
SMJ1: Then I'll just take up a few minutes of your time....
FW: You're already halfway done then.
SMJ1: Uh...right. Anyway... Run-DEA. After being loyal to Rick throughout the bulk of this war, when it's all over, you turned collectively on the very comrades in arms that you fought with, mere seconds after the victory. Any comment?
FW: Just because Bennett... or... well, whoever he is, would have been a terrible GM and run this company into the ground doesn't mean Rick is the shit. He's the lesser of two evils, that's all. And don't think for a second he would reward any of us that stood by him. We saw our opportunity to consolidate some power to protect ourselves, and we took it. Alexander and I were reluctant partners in this anyway... I have no doubt that I would have been among the first to be picked off out of the new Rick Regime. So we followed our own version of the Bush Doctrine.
SMJ1: The what?
FW: Look it up, Sarah.
SMJ1: But my name's--
FW: I'm tired...anything else?
SMJ1: Tyson seems to have been very badly affected by your statement explaining your relationship.
FW: Tyson...Tyson is badly affected by the sun rising. That's why I got tired of carrying his ass.
SMJ1: Carrying him? I thought you were a team? Why did he not come to OOWF with you then?
FW: Tired and now bored. Chris, you ready?
Y2J: For....?
FW: I'm going to the hotel to sleep. You need a lift to--
Y2J: Nope! I'm good! Taxi will be here...uh....shortly.
FW: Okay. See you at the PPV.
Firewoman takes off. Y2J watches, then looks at SMJ1
Y2J: Dude, I couldn't get a cab. Could you give me a lift?
SMJ1: What about Firewoman?
Y2J: There's no way in hell I'm getting on that with her again.
SMJ1: Sure....right over here.
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Post by mooseheadjack on Oct 6, 2008 17:13:54 GMT -5
(Josh O'Neal is seen leaving Zale K. DeBeers' lockerroom!)
JoN: ... so no more STUPID EFFRAM WHATTHEFUCKEVER! I QUIT! LIGHTS OUT! I'M GOING BACK TO RUN DEA!
(Spin Hansen comes stalking into the hallway. He's badly bruised and has his head bandaged from the beatdown administered by Run DEA. He's holding his trusty crowbar in one hand and a small plastic bag in the other.)
JoN: Hey, HANSEN! You SHIT! YOU DESERVE TO GO BACK TO JAIL!
(Spin... ignores him? The camera follows Hansen as he walks into the Destroyitarium. Laughter from F.F. Capslock and Stank issues from the doorway.)
JoN (from hallway): ... what the... Hansen doesn't usually... oh. Oh, fuck.
(O'Neal runs.)
Stank: We need to talk about Imperial Onslaught, Spin.
SH: One second, boss. I need to talk to Outback Jack about something. Oh, and welcome back, Lock.
(He keeps on walking and sits down next to Outback Jack.)
OBJ: What can I do for you, mate?
(Spin dumps the contents of a paper bag onto the table. Two containers of facepaint roll out... one white and one black. His eyes flicker with rage.)
SH: Teach me.
(Fade out.)
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Post by mooseheadjack on Oct 6, 2008 17:14:14 GMT -5
*OBJ and Spin have retreated to a booth in the back of the Destroyitarium*
OBJ: Maybe you should cool down a bit, mate. You know, act in haste, repent at leisure?
SH: You were there! You know what happened! Beatdowns come with the business, but this was way too over the fucking top!
OBJ: True, but you have to be careful when you do what Gator and I did as Empty Team. It can take over your whole person.
SH: You and Gator handled it.
OBJ: Right, but we had certain advantages. For me, having multiple personality disorder became a plus. The doc explained to me that I was able to bottle up most of my "psychotic rage" in Jack of the Hinterlands, who thrives on that sort of stuff. If he's not involved in some kind of mayhem he doesn't feel alive. As for Gator, well, he had his own means of stress relief, but I think it was getting to him, or else the Toledo incident would never have happened.
SH: I'm prepared to take some risks.
OBJ(drinks, belches): Australian for let me think about it.
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Post by mooseheadjack on Oct 6, 2008 17:14:46 GMT -5
*Your OOWF World Heavyweight Champion Davin Moreland and Samantha Darling are DRIVING~! (Davin's driving) in the Vanquish that Alexis hooked him up with about 12 hours ago. The sun's just coming up, but it's still pretty dark out* SD: Ok, seriously? Does this Cape Cod place even exist? DM: Yeah, we've been on the Cape for like 20 minutes already. SD: Where are we? How can you even see, there are no streetlights anywhere... DM: I know this place like the back of my hand. I grew up here, remember? I could drive around here blindfolded. SD: You pretty much have to. Where are we going anyway? I haven't seen a hotel or resort for hours. DM: If by "hours" you mean 45 minutes ago, then you're right. SD: Shut up. You know what I mean. DM: We're going to my house. SD: Your MOM'S house? DM: No, no...MY house. SD: You have a HOUSE? DM: Uh, yeah. I mean, I own it and everything. Seen it a couple of times. SD: So wait, you have a house that you never go to? DM: Yeah. Well, it's kind of hard to get to when you're in East Bumblefuckistan. I dunno. I've seen it twice; once when I bought it and once to go over stuff with the decorator. SD: Wait, is there like FURNITURE there? DM: Should be. Otherwise I'm gonna be pretty pissed off. Should be groceries too, everything. Mom sends people she trusts once a week over here to like run the water and stuff; make sure everything's here. I texted Mom on the way out here; hopefully she called someone to get some stuff in here. SD: Ok, so pretty much, you've never been here. DM: Pretty much; it'll be a new experience for the both of us. *Davin turns onto the road to Ponponessett Island, and down a private road* SD: You DO know where it is, right? DM: Yup. This IS Davin Road. I hope I can remember it. SD: Funny. www.raveis.com/propflyer.asp?STATE=MA&citypk=268&subcitypk=276&countypk=19&more=Y&LASTPG=40&TOTAL=200&Next=Y&FROM=propfind&PG=5&FSTKEY=2505081&LASTKEY=2274558&KEY=2505081&TYPE=EThey pull up to this house: SD: Looks kinda small. DM: You'll see. SD: Then again you DID drive a 10-year old Camry until like 12 hours ago. DM: We're here. *Samantha hops out of the car, and helps Davin, who is still taped up and struggling to get out of the car on his own* SD: At least now I know what you'll be like when you're 80. DM: True. But why do you care? SD: *pauses for a second* Do you even have the key? DM: Oh yeah. Hold on. *Davin reaches up into the gutter and pulls out the keys* DM: Guess I should take these with me from now on. SD: No, by all means, digging them out of the gutter makes you look awesome. DM: Shut up. SD: Make me. DM: Watch this. *Davin opens the front door and turns on the lights, and we see:* SD: Ok, that's not bad. DM: Well, it's no friggin Darling Compound, but it's mine. Hungry? SD: No. DM: Coffee? SD: Sure. *Davin goes to the kitchen: and opens the freezer, and finds several selections of Dunkin' Donuts coffee. Minutes pass and Davin returns to the Great Room with the coffee where Samantha is lying down on one of the couches* DM: Let's go outside. SD: It's cold. DM: Ok, a) it's not that cold, and b) you have coffee and c) bring a blanket and come outside. *Samantha grabs the throw blanket off the top of the couch, and they sit next to each other out on the deck, pictured here: * SD: This is better than I expected. DM: What did you expect? Motel 6? SD: Don't you mean Starwood Hotels Brands like Holiday Inn or Westin? DM: No, I was being derogatory, but thanks for that. SD: Anytime. *They sit in silence for a few minutes, watching the sun rise over the water* SD: Smiling. Yeah, that's not bad. DM: Told you. SD: You did. DM: We should come here more. SD: We've been here for like a half hour. DM: Still... SD: Davin, things have just gotten a million times harder for you; you know that, right? DM: Uh huh. SD: Stank's not going to be happy. DM: Nope. Fuck him. SD: Neither is Drink and Destroy. DM: Nope. Fuck them too. Seriously, all they can do is bitch about it now. They should have considered that before they decided Davin Moreland was just a dumb-muscle pushover. You know? How many times does Stank need to get beaten down before he changes his way? He's got to learn that you can't step on people and expect them to forget it. Ask Eric what happened to him when he tried it with me. Stank didn't learn then? Didn't see this coming? Stank's lost his edge. He was too busy trying to regain the spot he lost to a true champion in LD Williams and putting himself over by taking credit for shit HE DIDN'T DO, that he ignored the biggest threat he had. It could have been different. We could have worked together. But that's not how Stank rolls. So let him bitch and whine and call me what he wants. It's all meaningless. He'll get his shots; Rick will make sure of that, but now that he knows exactly what I'm capable of; and now that he's a caricature of his former self - I'm pretty confident. SD: What about the rest of Team Rick? DH? Spin Hansen? OBJ? Hell, CARL! JUSTIN! DM: Why are you getting upset over this? SD: I just want to make sure you've thought this through. DM: I have. Contingencies, everything. Hell, your sister and I were talking about this before we even did the merge. SD: Back when you were... DM: NOTHING HAPPENED! SD: Sure... DM: Seriously. Nothing. Means to an end, and we both were doing the same thing. You have nothing to worry about. SD: I'm not worried. I'll kill her if she tries anything. DM: Blood, thicker than water. Nice. SD: I'm just sayin'. DM: Kinda diggin' the jealous streak. SD: Thought you might. DM: I AM glad she's back though. It's been tough without her around keeping Alexander in check. SD: Hey! DM: Not the SAME way...you know how they are. SD: I know. Twins. DM: That's not what I mean. SD: I know that's not what you mean. I'd rather not talk about it. DM: Fine. SD: You and Lex, you're a lot alike. DM: Psh. Almost identical is more like it. I'm sure glad we're on the same team. That's all I know. SD: *looks over* Team Bennett hates you. Team Rick hates you... DM: Run DEA doesn't hate me. Others will forgive in time, and understand. Still others won't, and they can really go fuck themselves for all I care. They've got me to deal with. SD: The World Champ. DM: The World Champ. SD: I'm tired. DM: Let's go take a nap. SD: I said I'm tired. DM: I know. I have bad ribs. What could I POSSIBLY do? SD: Uh huh. *fade*
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Post by mooseheadjack on Oct 6, 2008 17:15:17 GMT -5
(Tytan sits alone in the locker room. Pissed off at what happened at Hell on Earth. He picks up his cell phone and dials a number to an old friend.)
Tytan: I am loosing my edge. You are right...whatever it was that you and Ultimo Inc. put into my system is leaving me.
Diana: But Tytan you are free from that you are your own man.....you have fans.
Tytan: That doesn't matter if I can't win the big matches.
Diana: But are you sure you want to travel down that road again.
Tytan: (Getting more fustrated with the situation.) Damn...I am enjoying that. (Then he realizes something) Maybe this is the reason why Poe and my paths's crossed. He is the one that is suppose to help me find a balance. Help me understand the difference between the God and Monster.
Diana: That's what you are going to have to decide. So do you want me to come to you.
Tytan: Yes, it's time you met the rest of the family. If G and M wants to be a successfull team then maybe I need to find my balance.
Diana: Fine. I may not agree with this but there is no way I am leaving you out of my sight.
Tytan: Then I will see you soon then Diana.
Diana: Yes, you will.
Tytan: And Diana...Thanks.
Diana: Don't thank me yet. This could get ugly quick.
(Fade to black)
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Post by mooseheadjack on Oct 6, 2008 17:15:41 GMT -5
<the camera cuts to LD Williams walking up the stairs of a filthy flop house. He walks down the hall stepping over bums and winos finally coming to a stop before a door with a 9 barely hanging on. LD pulls a slip of paper out of his pocket and checks, then bangs on the door. There is no answer, so LD lets himself in. Inside we see a filthy barely furnished room. There is a dirty mattress in one corner, a couch that has seen better days, a small television sitting on some milk crates, and an old recliner, that has also seen better days. Sitting in the recliner, still wearing a blood soaked t-shirt, with his head bandaged, is a man who has seen better days, Moosehead Jack>
LD: Moose, what the hell are you doing in this shithole?
MHJ: Came here to collect myself and heal up
LD: Looks like you could catch more than you can heal here. You look like shit.
MHJ: Thank you. Have you seen Crete?
LD: No, can't say I have
MHJ: I hope he looks worse than me
LD: That would be pretty hard to do
MHJ: Where's the title?
LD: I lost it. Davin won, didn't you see it?
MHJ: No, I was in and out of consciousness for most of the night, its all kind of a blur, you know?
LD: Christ Moose, why aren't you in the hospital?
MHJ: This is more therapeutic than any hospital
LD: So you have no idea who won War Games then?
MHJ: Well, from the look on your face, it wasn't us
LD: No. It was Rick's Team
<a long silence passes between them>
LD: And........to make things worse, Bennett wasn't who he said he was
MHJ: What?
LD: It was really Smark
MHJ: How the hell?
LD: Long story. Then after that, DEA turned on Drink & Destroy. Davin beat the hell out of Stank
MHJ: Stank is going to be PISSED.
LD: Well, Stank may have issue with you too
MHJ: Me? What the hell did I do?
<as he raises his voice Moose goes into a coughing fit and coughs up some blood>
LD: Jesus Moose
MHJ: I'll be fine, now what is this about Stank being pissed at me?
LD: Well, Davin says it was him that put the bounty on Stank's head
MHJ: Yeah, ok, and?
LD: You think maybe he is going to think you covered for Davin?
MHJ: Why the hell would I do that?
LD: You really didn't know it was Davin?
MHJ: I had no idea
<an awkward silence passes between them>
LD: Well, ok. Look Moose, you are in no shape to wrestle, I mean, if need be I can find another partner........
MHJ: Nah, I will be ready for the Invitational, I have plenty of time for that
LD: What about the IO?
MHJ: Nah, I heard enough to know that me and Crete are both off the show, OOWF doctors orders. That's fine. When the Invitational is over, when I get my hands on Crete.......
LD: You didn't hear then
MHJ: Hear what?
LD: Part of the deal for Crete to get the match was that this was it between you two. It's over
MHJ: Are you shittin' me?
LD: Rick knew what this match was going to be like, he had it written in, its over man
MHJ: Like fuck it is
<Moose tries to get up and immediately we can tell he is dizzy and he falls back into the seat>
LD: Seriously, you need some medical help Moose
MHJ: Don't worry about me, I will be fine. I am going to talk to some people about that clause in the contract. This war, this is NOT going to end like this.
LD: Good luck, I would be shocked if Rick budges from this, especially after that last match. Moose, I am going to be honest, I thought you were both dead
MHJ: That's just the tip of the iceberg
LD: That's what we're afraid of
<Moose looks at LD and gets a slight smile across his face>
MHJ: You don't worry about me, you go win that IO so you can get your title back from Davin
<LD doesn't say another word, he looks at Moose for a moment, then gets to his feet and walks out>
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Post by mooseheadjack on Oct 6, 2008 17:16:29 GMT -5
Seamus sits at a table playing strip poker with several hot woman and the other members of Gaelic Storm
Seamus: “ Hahahaha….whoooooo boys let me tell ya, everyone wants to know about Run DMC or The backstreet boys or whatever the fuck the call themselves…who cares. So they served a bunch of dumbass people who thought they were faces? What the fuck…look they belong on Springer or Jackass but really who gives a rat ass…as for everyone who thought I couldn’t hold on to my title for more that a week – fuck off…I am your champion so deal with it. So Fire gets rookie of the year…woop ti do…some idiot in a furby costume gets an award whoo hooo…I don’t care about any of that horse shit – I don’t care about anyone or anything except my boys, my toys and this 16 lbs of gold…so deal!
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Post by mooseheadjack on Oct 6, 2008 17:16:49 GMT -5
*Fade in to the palatial IHOP locker room. Fezzik and The Amnesiac are reviewing tape for the Imperial Onslaught match at OOWF MidWeek Mayhem, Live! From Springfield, Florida. Meanwhile, SYB and Skurge are sitting on the couch. Skurge is trying to get SYB to tell him what the Lovely and Talented Dorothy Mantooth promised him at OOWF Hell on Earth IV…
SYB: Dude. For the last time, I ain’t telling. Dorothy made me promise I wouldn’t. Skurge: Um, please? SYB: Oh, okay. Skurge: Really? SYB: Of course not, jackass. Skurge: You really aren’t very nice sometimes, you know. SYB: Yes. Yes I do know. Skurge: Well, where is Dorothy, eh? Let’s just get this mystery over with and move on. There’s a pretty big match this week that we should be thinking aboot. SYB: I don’t know where she–
*SYB stops short as the Lovely and Talented Dorothy Mantooth enters the palatial IHOP locker room. She has a crazed look about her, she’s covered in sweat, and there’s blood on her hands…
SYB: Dorothy…where have you…what have you…what the fuck? Why are you covered in blood and sweat? This definitely wasn’t part of our deal. DM: … Skurge: Uh, Dorothy? What’s going on? DM: …I need a drink. Skurge: Just sit. I’ll get it for you.
*The Lovely and Talented Dorothy Mantooth sits on the couch while Skurge makes her a drink. SYB, Fezzik, and The Amnesiac watch her nervously. No one speaks until Skurge returns with her drink…
DM: Ahhh, that’s better. Skurge: Now, are you ready to tell us what happened? DM: Well, do you remember how I went on a few dates with LJ Bennett? Skurge: Uh huh. DM: He lied to me. He lied to us all. Made promises he couldn’t keep. I had to teach him a lesson. I had to. Skurge: Okay Dorothy, this is starting to sound bad. What did you do to Bennett? DM: Remember what happened to Justin Sane?
*All four men visibly shudder…
Skurge: Yes. I don’t think we’ll ever forget that one. DM: Well, I wasn’t half as mad at him as I was at Bennett. Skurge: Dear god, Dorothy, what exactly did you do to Bennett? SYB: Dude, even I don’t want the details on this one. Skurge: We need to know what we’re dealing with here, eh? Dorothy, please. DM: Well, I took my vib–
*But we don’t get to hear the rest of the Lovely and Talented Dorothy Mantooth’s explanation, as it’s drowned out by an unidentified blood-curdling scream from down the hall…
UBCS: Holy fuck! Who would do something like this? This is fucking sick! I–
*The unidentified blood-curdling screams cease as the unidentified blood-curdling screamer passes out and the camera begins to *FADE*
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Post by mooseheadjack on Oct 6, 2008 17:17:12 GMT -5
GMtR - ...
Stank - You fuckin OWE me.
GMtR - Win the Imperial Onslaught and you can have him.
Stank - ...
GMtR - Wh..What... what do you want me to do Stank?
Stank - I want you to make this right.
GMtR - ...
Stank - You know I didn't ask to be the team leader of Team Rick. Fuck I tried to walk away. But it was you and Davin who PUT me in that position and that deluded fuck of champion of yours goddamn well KNOWS it! I mean SERIOUSLY?? I STEPPED on people. Name ONE goddamn person I stepped on Rick?
GMtR - I never sai-
Stank - If I stepped on Davin... If I HELD him DOWN, then HE would goddamn well NOT be the OOWF World champion. That motherfucker! If ANYONE was stepped on it was ME. He's been trying to bury me for months now. I NEVER stood in his way. I didn't do a goddamn thing to him, but tell him the truth. I motivated the ASS to get where he is. TRYING regain my spot? REALLY? If I were doing that RICK... I NEVER would have FOUGHT in that FUCKING WAR!
GMtR - I know that Luca-
Stank - But you best BELIEVE I'm going to get that spot now! Guess who's standing in it? And along the WAY... RUN DEA will FALL! YOU and I BOTH know what time it is! Davin thinks he can BURY ME? It will NEVER happen! But I sure as shit will see it done to him. BELIEVE THAT!
You tell your boy... your little assistant GM, who did "ALL" the hard work and got no recognition for his efforts... you tell that son of bitch that had he left well enough ALONE he MIGHT have enjoyed a nice long reign as champ, while I busied myself in a killer feud with Adrenaline and Adjuster. You TELL him that had he left well enough ALONE he may have enjoyed a nice long reign, while I busied myself taking care of that loose end you and I know is still out there. You tell your OOWF World Champion that he has royally, FUCKED up! I'm NOT the one you PICK a FIGHT with if you WANT to stay CHAMPION! If he THOUGHT I was stepping on him BEFORE... he hasn't seen a got damn thing YET. Whether it is me or not... I WILL SEE that title belt OFF of his waist!
<Stank rises from his seat and starts to walk off, but he stumbles and falls back to his chair, clutching at his knee. Rick jumps up.>
GMtR - You alright?
Stank - Fuck you Rick. YOU MAKE THIS SHIT RIGHT!
<FF Capslock walks in.>
FFC - Hey man you promised not to lose your cool.
Stank - Fuck you too, Lock and help me up. My knee is throbbing.
<FFC walks over and helps his friend up, putting Stank's arm around his shoulder.>
FFC - Is this how it's going to be with you and me in these promos? I'm just going to walk in as it winds down so you have a convenient out...? Cause truthfully... I was hoping to be in one of those, you know. Epic pieces like... like... oooh That FACE OFF shit you did with Cole or... or... you KNOW like back in the day, with the Old West Promo and OOOH REMEMBER... remember the NEVER ENDING PROMO... that shit was sweet.
Stank - ...
FFC - ...
GMtR - ...
Stank - Dude I'm... I'm trying to be all serious here and... you're kind of...
FFC - Ruining the moment?
Stank - Sort of, yeah?
FFC - Right um... well you know... it's been... it's been a while you know and... my timing.. might be off a bit. Just give me a couple of promos to get back into the swing of things... yeah.
Stank - Oh christ... You're not going to do something weird like... exact revenge on Davin and the others by... oh I don't know... putting dead animals in their locker rooms or... smearing ejaculate on their new rides or some shit.
FFC - WHAT? That's DISGUSTING! How could yo- OK I'M NOT thinking of DOING it NOW... now that you've RUINED the surprise! And for the record I wouldn't have smeared ejaculate AND shit on their rides.
Stank - ...
GMtR - ...
FFC - ... Cause... you know... Ryan pretty much took my... entire burrito and porn collection... along with... any other motivational... tools... I might need for... such a dirty... job.
Stank - ...
GMtR - ...
FFC - OKAY! It was RYAN'S burrito and porn collection to BEGIN with! But he RARELY... uh... ok THAT'S a lie. That guy ate a LOT of burritos and looked at a LOT of porn, let me tell you.
Stank - ...
GMtR - ... uh... could you guys... just... go now?
<fade>
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Post by mooseheadjack on Oct 6, 2008 17:17:37 GMT -5
*OBJ and Spin are in the back of the Destroyitarium*
OBJ: You know how, sometimes, when you're in a match, and some asshole pisses you off? Maybe hits you with a cheap shot?
Spin: Yeah?
OBJ: You know, how Darling and Moreland are scumbags? You know how you want to kill them? You know hiw your rage is burning hot? Like a red hot flame?
Spin; Of course!
OBJ(eyes roll back, Jack of the Hinterlands face appears): Well, you need to know something completely different. You need to draw deep into a cold, dark place inside of you. Maybe you have it, maybe you don't. You need a deep dark center. The key is a complete lack of empathy. Empty yourself of all human sentiments. Destroying your enemies is the only thing that gives you pleasure. You gladly take a hit ot two to give your opponent another. You have the advantage, because you have no fear. If they strike you down, get up and pay them back!
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Post by mooseheadjack on Oct 6, 2008 17:18:13 GMT -5
*Davin Moreland and Samantha Darling are PARKING~! at the arena in Springfield, Indiana. Samantha walks around to help Davin out, and he gets out easier this time. He puts his arm around her and they both walk to the Run DEA Locker Room and Suites, presented by Aquafina and Starwood Hotels. As they get to the door, SFJ#420 saunters out from behind the dumpster, chomping on a candy bar*
SFJ420: Sup.
DM: Uh, what's up there. You new?
SFJ420: *chuckles* Yeah...
SD: Was there something you wanted?
SFJ420: Oh yeah...
*time passes*
DM: Were you gonna let us in on your little secret?
SFJ420: Dude...What?
SD: Do you have questions to ask or what?
SFJ420: Um...probably?
DM: Let me help you out...did someone say something about me?
SFJ420: Oh yeah, I think so...maybe...something...
SD: Who was it.
SFJ420: Uh, Crunk...Skunk....
DM: Stank?
SFJ420: YEAH YEAH! Oh my God that's TOTALLY who it was!
SD: So, what did he say?
SFJ420: Um...something something something Rick, something blah blah blah Davin...wrong guy something something.
DM: *grins* Sounds about right.
SFJ420: So? What do you think?
DM: I think Stank's brain is rotting. I think Stank needs to look in the mirror when he starts calling people divas because he's starting to come off like a pussy-ass emo bitch. "WAAAH HE WAS MEAN RICK WAAAAH WAAAAH WAAAH!" Get your match Stank, and come and get yourself some. I just don't think you've got the sack anymore Lucas, I really don't. Really? "I'm gonna get you?" "You're gonna pay?" For fucking WHAT Stank? You got what you had coming to you; and in fact; you got off easy. I should have ended your career for what you did to me. Your arrogance is astounding Stank. You're the innocent one, right? You had NOTHING to do with what happened, right? That's been the story of your career Stank. You've never taken responsibility for shit. Capslock turns on you? All his fault. You do Moose's dirty work for him and get yourself a belt? All Moose's fault; you never did ANYTHING wrong to TraitorMask.
SD: Alexis getting kidnapped and tortured? You have no responsibility for that, you only sent her there, right?
DM: So, there's really nothing to see here folks. Stank is whining that whatever happened isn't his fault...AGAIN. You got taken out because you asked for it. Hell, you BEGGED me for it. You may as well have stuck a big sign on your head that said "Davin, beat the shit out of me because I've been nothing but a prick to you". So Stank, it's your fault. Just like it's always your fault. But you'll never take responsibility for your actions. You never do. So Stank, you want a match; you can beg Rick for the match he's going to inevitably give you anyway, and we can settle it in the ring. And Magnusson, Hansen, OBJ, Capslock; keep running your mouths. Drink and Destroy is a shadow of its former self. Don't bite off more than you can chew. You don't ALL have to get your careers ended. Hell Mags, you just got here. You want to talk shit to me? Remember what happened last time we tangled mush-mouth? You DON'T want none of this, fat boy. You should go a pet your puppies and thank GOD that he blessed you, somehow, with that belt of yours; because God knows you certainly didn't pin the real champ for it.
SD: Hey, good point.
DM: Thanks. Besides, you didn't know? I'm Run DEA. And if you don't get it - you will. Soon. Very soon. Your retribution is coming soon. If you want to speed that process up; that's on you. And Mags, if by some miracle you face me in the finals in the Championship Tournament, you'd better bring your big boy pants, Son. Probably a good idea to spit that cock out of your mouth when you talk too. It's unseemly.
SFJ420: Whoa.
DM: We done here, "FlossesWithHemp"?
SFJ420: It's Moonbeam.
SD: Of course it is.
DM: *digs in his pocket* Here a coupon for D'Angelo's. 10 Free Subs i think.
SFJ420: OH MY GOD I LOVE YOU!
*She lunges to hug Davin, but Samantha jumps in the way and blocks her*
SD: Step the fuck off bitch! I'll cut you!
*SFJ...Moonbeam takes off running*
DM: Ok, that's kinda hot.
SD: *composes herself* Don't...start.
DM: Yes'm. Let's go.
*They make their way into the Run DEA Locker Room and Suites, presented by Aquafina and Starwood Hotels. Alexander and Alexis Darling are sitting over by the wetbar, and spot Davin and Samantha. Davin goes over to the bar, fixes two Grey Gooses (Grey Geese?) on the rocks, and hands one to Samantha as they both sit on a couch across from them*
LD: Nice of you to join us this week.
AD: Seriously, it's already freakin' Tuesday.
DM: So?
AD: So? Where the fuck have you been, so?
SD: I have a really good idea. Why don't you go fuck yourself, and let the Champ enjoy his victory for a couple of days, huh?
LD: Seriously, Brother Dear. I was just kidding around.
AD: Well, we've got planning to do.
DM: Do we? I mean, Me and the boys have the Championship Tournament to do, and you and Fire have Imperial Onslaught. No real rocket science involved.
LD: I was thinking we may want to...re-introduce ourselves to the OOWF Public.
DM: Why?
LD: Oh, I dunno, to maybe get us over?
DM: Yeah, like *I* really need to get over. My God, this isn't IWA-MS anymore, Lexie.
*This predictably starts a lengthy staredown, complete with squinty eyes and dirty looks*
SD: And this takes approximately how long?
AD: *yawns* Depends on how serious the issue is. This one normally wouldn't be that long; but I think they've just missed each other.
LD: You can kindly fuck off, Brother Dear.
AD: Almost done.
DM: Seriously, fuck off, Alex.
AD: Aaaaaannnnnnnd.....TIME!
DM: Fine Lexie. I just hope you remember how we do this.
LD: Jesus, get over yourself already; you'll love it. I promise.
DM: Well your promises and a dollar will get me a $.99 Egg and Cheese Sandwich from Dunkin' Donuts.
LD: Nice, insult AND an ad placement. Well done.
DM: Thank you.
SD: ANYWAY, back on topic; what were you planning on, Lexie?
DM: *holds his hand up* You know what? Whatever she decides will probably be perfect. This is the kind of thing I hired her for.
LD: Wait. YOU hired ME? I think you've got that backwards, fucko.
AD: Well, I'm tired, I'm going to bed. If you need me you know where I'll be.
*Alexander Leaves*
LD: Didn't we used to be at least civil to each other?
DM: *shrugs* Kind of. It was actually more like this most of the time.
*Samantha starts laughing*
LD: What?
SD: Nothing. It's good to have you back, sis.
DM: *stands up and tousles Alexis' hair* Me too, freak show.
LD: *kind of smiles* Do that again and I'll bite your hand off.
DM: And on that note...I think it's bedtime. Sam?
SD: *takes Davin's hand* Sounds like a plan, Cowboy.
*they start to walk away towards Davin's room*
LD: Wait a second...
SD: What?
LD: Are you two...
DM: Yes Lexie. Something Happened.
SD: Clever.
DM: I thought so.
*fade*
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Post by mooseheadjack on Oct 6, 2008 17:18:35 GMT -5
*Spin and OBJ are watching the RunDEA promo, When it ends, OBJ replays it. Spin looks very pissed off*
OBJ: Makes you want to rush right over to their locker room and do something extreme, right?
SH: Damn right!
OBJ: Not good enough, mate. Anger is an energy, but without focus it won't get the job done properly. Besides, if you want to take down some tall poppies permanently, you've got to start with the roots.
SH: OK, what exactly did that last part mean?
OBJ: We need to go somewhere a little more private.
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Post by mooseheadjack on Oct 6, 2008 17:18:58 GMT -5
(the camera cuts to Blackdragon walking up the stairs of a local hospital. He walks down the hall navigating around equipment and patients, finally coming to a stop before a door numbered "284". BD checks the names on the door; recognizing one, BD lets himself in. Inside we see a cluttered room. There is a chair with a duffel in one corner, a curtain slid half-open, a small television mounted near the ceiling, and a single bed with the covers half-on. resting in the bed, still in half blood-soaked bandages, is a man who is still half-conscious, ConcreteTG)
BD: Crete? I half expected you to be at your gym, but you weren't
CTG: I needed time to collect myself and heal up
BD: Looks like you're getting treated well here. You still look like shit.
CTG: (faint smirk) Thank you. Have you seen Moosehead JAck?
BD: No, can't say I have
CTG: I hope he survived this ordeal
BD: I'm sure he did, he's too stubborn to die.
CTG: Who won the title?
BD: Davin won, didn't you see it?
CTG: No, I was in and out of consciousness for most of the night, its all kind of a blur, you know?
BD: Crete, how are you even conscious?
CTG: My victory aids my recuperation
BD: So you have no idea who won War Games then?
CTG: Judging from your calm demeanor, it wasn't us.....?
BD: No. It was Rick's Team
(CTG smiles faintly, but says nothing more)
BD: And........to make things worse, Bennett wasn't who he said he was
CTG: What?
BD: It was really Smark
CTG: "a" smark, or "The" Smark?
BD: "The" Smark.... Long story. Then after that, DEA turned on Drink & Destroy. Davin beat the hell out of Stank
CTG: Stank is going to be FURIOUS
BD: I'm sure he is - and he's hurt
CTG: but there's nothing I can do from here-
(as he raises his voice CTG goes into a coughing fit)
BD: Crete?
CTG: I'll be fine.... did any more information come out about the bounty?
BD: Well, Davin says it was him that put the bounty on Stank's head
CTG: it certainly wasn't me
BD: You think maybe he is going to think Moose covered for Davin?
CTG: Let him think that, that would be closer to the truth
BD: You really didn't know it was Davin?
CTG: I thought it was Moose, myself.
BD: You're in no shape to wrestle Crete. And I don't think Firewoman will be interested in working with you now....
CTG: (coughs) I will be ready for the Invitational
BD: What about the IO?
CTG: I doubt the doctors will allow me to leave. Moosehead Jack should also be barred from the competition. Moose will still be an issue.....
BD: You didn't hear then
CTG: Hear what?
BD: Rick made sure the contract said that this match was the end for you.
CTG: I should be relieved.
BD: You should be happy
CTG: I just know Moosehead Jack too well
(CTG tries to sit up, hesitates and lays back down)
BD: Need me to get the nurse?
CTG: Don't worry about me, I will be fine.
BD: I would be shocked if Rick budges from this, especially after that last match. I am going to be honest, I thought you were both dead - so did just about the entire roster and everyone there
CTG: There was a moment or two, Dragon, that I thought I was. Moosehead Jack, he would survive much worse, despite my efforts
BD: And Moose isn't going to let this die, either,
(CTG looks at BD and gets a slight smile across his face)
CTG: (drifting off) don't fear for my life, citizen........ (falls asleep)
(BD doesn't say another word, he looks at CTG for a moment, then gets to his feet and walks out)
Nurse Kayfabe: (Glowers at BD as he walks down the hall)
BD: Don't blame ME, this is almost schtick anymore!
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Post by mooseheadjack on Oct 6, 2008 17:19:20 GMT -5
<OOWF banner in the back. Stank in front of the camera.>
Stank - That's a nice bit of revisionist, bullshit history you've painted there Davin. You keep talkin shit. You keep making it worse for yourself. You and I both know the truth and it ain't Ron Killings. The truth is you were too busy trying to fuck Alex's sister to be bothered with the war, while I was trying to win it. The truth is Mr. self appointed assistant GM, YOU were to limpdicked to do JACK SHIT with your position, while Mr. "Doesn't take any responsibility" was LEADING OUR fucking team to victory.
You can't have it both ways asshole. Either I took on the responsibility of being the "Leader" of Team Rick or I didn't. It's true... in the beginning days of the war, you were doing your part. You took on a leadership role even while our GM was being an asshat. But somewhere along the way YOU LOST your way. Distracted by that Alexis Darling pussy that you were never gonna get. SOMEONE had to do something and you goddamn right I fucking stepped in.
Where were YOU when our men were getting ambushed and ATTACKED after EVERY FUCKING match in the early days of the war? Did you rally the troops? Did you do a goddamn thing? Fuck no! I brought us together. WE took the FIGHT to BENNETT and his boys and that shit stopped! You... "Gee I wished I thought of that." Well Why didn't you? Too busy drinking coffee, eating donuts and getting us endorsement deals. Wow endorsement deals... that will show Bennett... thanks.
After that the only thing I begged for was for you and Rick to TAKE CONTROL OF YOUR GODDAMN COMPANY! But did you? Fuck no. You came to ME. YOU put me in the leadership role. I didn't want it, but the alternative was defeat. And I don't lose. Oh I may lose a match here and there, but ultimately I always get what I want. I knew we needed to do more than just fight here in the OOWF to win this war. We needed to take down Bennett. So yes, I suggested that Alexis go investigate and she agreed to it. I sent Ax-Man along with her. Crete sent Blackdragon. Who did you send Mr. Assistant GM? Who? Where the fuck were you? Fuck why didn't YOU go with her? Because you and she had a falling out? She wouldn't put out for you? OH I get it... you and she were setting the stage for a big time swerve on that shell of his former self, Stank.
Bullshit. I know your dumb ass didn't think of that shit on your own. That was more likely one of your teammate's ideas They will be dealt with.
But this story is about you Davin. It's finally all about you, isn't it?
Three years Davin... three long, hardworking, ass kicking years it took me to get the OOWF World Title... and I didn't have to worm my way into management to do it. I kicked ass and I took names and I earned my fucking spot. If I "big time" as you put it... I do so because I can. I've earned it.
You walk into this company, alienate half the roster, bury the other half, no sell, and talk shit to everyone, but me. You didn't do that to me did you. No you waited until now. You've waited til now to let your jealousy get the best of you. Whatever donut man. You still haven't defined what it is I did to you. Quite frankly I don't give a shit at this point.
I can't wait. I can't wait until you and I face off one on one again. I guarantee you this... win, lose, or draw... the next time... the outcome will be VERY different.
Keep talking that shit, Davin. You can "Blah, Blah" me all you want. Just stop pretending like this is about some perceived slight I had against you. Be a fucking man and admit that the only reason you have picked this fight with me is because it EATS you alive that this "shell of his former self", this "emo-pussy fuck diva" is MORE of a CHAMPION WITHOUT that belt, than you will ever be WITH it.
Fuck off, cameraman. This promo is over.
<fade>
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Post by mooseheadjack on Oct 6, 2008 17:19:41 GMT -5
(Spin Hansen and Jack of the Hinterlands are in the boiler room. A board has hastily been shoved between the door handles as an ersatz lock...)
SH: Private enough?
JotH: This'll do.
SH: So about that root cutting...
JotH: In a moment. First, you have to find that cold place inside. Compress all of your anger into one solid point. Get rid of everything else. Empty Team wasn't called Empty Team for nothing, mate.
SH: I still want to go into those locker rooms and start fucking things up. Fucking double-talking hypocrites. Fucking handshakes for honor. Fucking HAVES.
(Jack of the Hinterlands produces a bamboo switch from nowhere and CRACKS Spin on the back! Blood trickles down Spin's back.)
JotH: Don't externalize. Keep it inside. Focus it. Direct it. Know that you will cause pain with it. Keep that up and you'll never understand.
(Spin exhales slowly, arms twitching with anger... but the twitching slows. )
JotH: Keep it up...
(The screen fades as Spin continues breathing deeply...)
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Post by mooseheadjack on Oct 6, 2008 17:20:00 GMT -5
[Johnny Adrenaline is walking thru the back when he sees Eric O'Mac, still wearing the PHWF Heavyweight Title.]
JA: Sup dawg? [holds out a fist] Nice belt there. Bling blingin, yo? All that stuff? Me and Tude used to have the tag belts. That's some real shit.
EOM: ... [walks off]
JA: The fuck'd I do to him?
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Post by mooseheadjack on Oct 6, 2008 17:20:32 GMT -5
It's morning in America...no wait...not that....
Firewoman wakes up, drinks her coffee that Lucky has ready for her and watches what happened on OOWF-TV during the 24 hours she was out. She rolls her eyes at Davin and Samantha, cringes at Moose and Crete's injuries, and basically tries to wake up. She surveys her own healing injuries from War Games, sips her coffee, gets text message from Alexander saying "I saw that. Wear the goddamned helmet."....then stops. She rewinds and watches DH Magnusson and Stank's video.
FW: Oh trust me, DH. I'm taking notes. Lucky! Get your ass in here!
Lucky comes in, and we can't really tell what is going on because there is a flurry of activity. Eventually, it becomes clear that even though there's been a ninja cam in her hotel room for a good 30 minutes now, Firewoman has demanded a ninja cam so she can address something.
L: Okay, I think we're ready...um, Fire.....
FW: What. What the hell NOW?
L: You should probably get dressed.
FW: Oh....
With that little detail taken care of, the OOWF banner materializes out of nowhere behind her.
FW: So DH wants us to take notes? Well, not us. D.H., are you just not paying attention? You are just like the rest of Stank's groupies. "Oh, Davin and Alex are so baaaaaad." Well, let me show you something.
Firewoman cues up footage from Sunday night's Hell on Earth IV, specifically, this:
FW: Did you see that DH? You all continue to blame Davin and Alex, when it was me that put you down. Alexander is good, but he can't be two places at once.
It's about time you all start giving me the respect I deserve. I'm no one's sidekick or girlfriend, or little sister. I am a force to be reckoned with, and it's high time you all start reckoning. I knocked you on your ass, DH. You have a problem with that, you come talk to me about it. We'll see how that sparkles for you.
And the camera goes dark as a hand pushes into it, signifying that the segment is over.
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Post by mooseheadjack on Oct 6, 2008 17:20:56 GMT -5
*Davin Moreland and Samantha Darling are WATCHING~! OOWF-TV on the Sony Multimedia Center, and they're both laughing hysterically*
DM: Oh Lucas, you stupid son of a bitch. You still don't get it.
SD: Wait, are you sure you UNDERSTAND, Davin? I mean, you couldn't POSSIBLY have any of your own thoughts, right?
DM: Yes. ME DAVIN ME SMASH BLAAARGH! What a retard.
SD: You see Stank, you can sit back and try to justify things in whatever way you want and try to get over with the fans, or people in the locker room or whatever. But you know what, there are at least AS many people who remember all those events our way; than your revisionist history way.
DM: You sound like John McCain, Lucas. Haphazardly changing strategies second by second to find something that works.
SD: Thank you for saying that. Daddy would have been pissed if I did.
DM: I know. Point is Lucas, what you WERE is of no consequence to me. I don't care about what you did before. All I know is the reality of now. You got your ass kicked by fucking with the wrong guy one too many times. You see, you can only push me so far before I'm going to push back; and in a big way. So please, spare the justifications and the fact that you will take no responsibility for anything you've done. Seriously. It's tired. Hell if you came out and said "I'm Sorry, I was wrong", you'd at least get some respect. But making up shit Lucas? Boring. It's the desperate ploy of a desperate man.
SD: So by all means; keep looking in the wrong places for answers. Don't believe the reality that has been in front of you this whole time.
DM: I put the bounty out on you Stank. You had revised history too many times; in fact, kind of like you just did a few minutes ago; and you needed to be taught a lesson and put in your place. I called Moose; I have no idea if he knew who it was or not, but he told me he wouldn't do it - that he couldn't be bought. Why he's loyal to a lying tub of goo like you Lucas is beyond me, and loyalty will probably be his undoing someday. But you should be thanking Moose instead of vilifying him.
SD: After all, he didn't take you out. And he had plenty of opportunities...
DM: And about a million points of inspiration...
SD: Heh. That too.
DM: So by all means, blame Moose. Or better yet, blame Alexander. Ignore the fact that *I* had to drag HIM along with me.
SD: Alexis showed up just in time, Thank God.
DM: Yup. Oddly enough, my brothers Phantos and Lucios were easier to convince. The Heels, The Sons; same bullshit. Holding down the best things going in the company. Ignoring all their sacrifice to get Team Rick to where it was. There comes a point, Lucas...You shove people to the side long enough, they're gonna shove back. And when you got a little crazy in you like *I* do - I'll shove back pretty hard.
SD: Stank, how's your knee?
DM: *laughing* You see, Lucas, if I had wanted to, I could have put you out for good when I beat you. I just wanted to hurt you. The other night? I just wanted to hurt you. I'm going to continue hurting you until you quit; because I want you to hang around for this; to hang around and see what happens during the Davin Moreland Era in the Time of Run DEA. I've cut your balls off Lucas. You don't have a leg to stand on anymore. You can beg Rick to help you; but ultimately, he's just one seat on the booking committee.
SD: Wait a second, don't you have a seat there too?
DM: Hey, you're right Samantha, I do. Of course, I'm not allowed to book myself.
SD: Of course. That would be wrong.
DM: It would.
SD: So Stank, if you want to sit there and bitch and moan every day about how much your life sucks, that's your right.
DM: I just ask that you get the facts straight. Everything that has happened is a result of your actions. I understand it must be tough to take; but that's the truth. "Who put the bounty on Stank?" The real answer? Stank put the bounty on Stank, when he decided to big-time, take credit, and use any remaining stroke he had left to come off as the Superhero.
SD: You only did what anyone else would have done, sweetie.
DM: I know. I almost feel sorry for him.
SD: Me too. I mean, he can't POSSIBLY be this dumb...can he?
DM: Well, he honestly believes he's never done anything wrong; so that's pretty dumb right there.
SD: Especially the way he's dealt with his brother. I'm sure that's ALL his brother's fault too.
DM: Oh, that much is clear. Stank has never done anything wrong, ever.
SD: Must be nice.
DM: Must be. Lucas, you dumb, fat son of a bitch. Go beg Rick for your match. I won't block it. Hell, add a stip. Add two stips. I haven't had a good stip match in a while. Just know this. Your empty threats are meaningless - I make you this promise, you get in the ring with me again, I will embarrass you. I will expose you. Everyone will see what a fraud you've become. That will be a sad, sad day. And you might want to be careful dragging everyone else along into this fight with me. Alex? Fire? Phantos and Lucios? You don't want that kind of hassle. A bunch of old guys bleeding in the middle of the ring? No one wants to see that. So try to stay focused on your actual goal. The one who cut your balls off. The one who embarrassed you. The one who made you look like a fool. The one who's turned you into a bumbling idiot. The one who's exposed your games for the World to see. Davin. Moreland.
SD: Your World Champion.
DM: Nice. Maybe he should join the superfriends and wear a mask with the traitor now?
SD: If he's still alive.
DM: Point taken.
SD: You got anything else?
DM: Nothing new. Just "you're a dumb fuck Lucas", that pretty much sums it up.
SD: Maybe that's why he's so mad?
DM: Because he was too stupid to see this coming, or that he was too fucking stupid to see it coming from me?
SD: You make a good point.
DM: Let's get out of here.
*fade*
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Post by mooseheadjack on Oct 6, 2008 17:21:27 GMT -5
Stank - Turn that shit off.
Bartender - Can I just change the channel?
Stank - Whatever. Is there a camera near- oh there you are. Davin I was just about to say the same thing about you being John McCain. Your strategy of blaming me for your own shortcomings isn't working so you co-opt MY message?
You call me dumb? I call you unoriginal.
As I clearly stated before, you're the one presenting us with revisionist history, you jealous fuckwad. I never pushed you. I never stood in your way. Your deluded sorry ass just up and decided that it was time to be the man, so you're trying to beat the man.
I don't feel a bit sorry for you. The only one that's already embarrassing himself is you. I can't make it anymore clear than I already have. So I'm giving you the same answer that I've given you since you started this. I'll break it down for your dimwitted ass.
You fucked up.
You're going to pay.
I don't expect you to be afraid and I don't give a shit what the fans think or anyone else. The next time you and I meet, whether that's in the ring, the parking lot, the hallway, your own lockerroom, I'm going to beat your bitch ass. I'm going to end you.
God help anyone who stands in my way.
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