OOWF MidWeek Mayhem
Live! From Springfield, California
THE DEAD vs. DAMON WRATHSterling Glaw is YOUR referee!.
Damon Wrath sets to lockup, but The Dead doesn't even look impressed. He seems insulted by facing the least member of the Heroes' Guild and just stares him down. The larger Wrath hesitates, then steps directly up to Dead and the two exchange words. The Dead remains unimpressed and SLAPS THE TASTE OUT OF DAMON WRATH! Wrath's eyes widen, then he turns away, drops to his knees, and......
cries like a baby? The Dead laughs heartily and watches the spectacle for a moment before gathering a mic. He kneels in front of Wrath, cocking his head comically.
Dead: "Surely you see that you're outmatched? Those tears aren't exactly.... what do you people call it..... 'heroic'?"Damon Wrath looks up after a moment. then in one motion snaps to his feet and gives The Dead a RANDY ORTON punt! Dead sprawls and drops the mic. Wrath picks it up.
Wrath: "April fool's, Bitch...... and DON'T CALL ME SHIRLEY!" Glaw slaps his forehead in disbelief, missing Wrath pouncing on Dead and laying into him with several punches. Glaw gets over there late and counts off, Wrath backing away at four. The Dead is just starting to get to his feet (because he KNOWS a Randy Orton punt really does no damage) as Wrath closes in again. The Dead gets his feet under him and tackles Wrath back and the two tumble toward the ropes. Glaw calls for a break and gets it, Dead backing slowly away and Wrath pulling himself up with the ropes. NOW these two finally lock up, and Glaw finally seems to relax.
Wrath pushes Dead back to the corner, and Glaw calls for a break. Wrath backs up a couple of steps before The Dead LUNGES out of the corner with an attempt at CLOSE THE CASKET! Wrath stays clear of the kick and backs up further, forcing Dead to charge. Wrath catches him and launches him skyward, but on the way down Dead catches Wrath with a HUGE DDT! Wrath is stunned for a few seconds - enough time for The Dead to casually wrap Wrath up in his DEATHLOCK! Wrath screams, flails..... and finally taps, head down.
WINNER in 6:34 The Dead
TYTAN vs. ZANE MYERSMyers is announced first and he gets a huge ovation from the crowd. Myers pauses to soak it up, then heads down the ramp, slapping hands with the Zaniacs along the way. Myers steps between the ropes and walks up to the referee and shakes his hand, and waits in the corner for Tytan. Tytan charges to the ring and steps between the ropes and doesn’t even wait for a bell, he just charges into the corner and attacks Myers, beating him to the mat with rights and lefts. The referee calls for the bell to start the match and Myers works to his feet, and he and Tytan go toe to toe trading thunderous shots to the head. Myers, with the fans clearly behind him, gets the better of the exchange and backs Tytan to the ropes and tries a whip, but Tytan reverses it and catches Myers with a big boot that sends him slumping against the middle rope. Tytan charges at Myers and Myers steps off the ropes and drop toe holds Tytan, sending him onto the middle rope. Myers gets a running start and jumps onto Tytan’s back, choking him on the ropes. Myers pulls Tytan into the ring and covers him, but Tytan kicks out with authority at one. Tytan gets to his feet and snarls, and catches Myers with a straight right to the jaw that drops Myers to one knee. Tytan charges and KILLS Myers with a clothesline, sending him out of the ring to the floor. Tytan immediately pulls Myers up and slams him face first into the ring steps, then catches him with a boot to the face that sends him into the guard rail. Tytan traps Myers against the rail and HAMMERS him with rights and lefts. The referee nearly counts them both out, but Tytan shoots Myers into the ring. Myers wipes the blood from his face, from a gash left by one of Tytan’s punches, and backs into the corner and gets to his feet. Tytan charges in for a clothesline, but Myers gets a big boot up, catching Tytan on the jaw and spinning him around. Myers climbs to the second rope and leaps, and drives Tytan to the mat with a bulldog. Myers hooks him, rolls him over, and covers, but only gets a two count. Myers tries to pull Tytan to his feet, but Tytan nails him with a low blow, somehow the referee doesn’t see that. Tytan grabs Myers and throws him between the ropes to the floor. Tytan follows him and slams him face first into the ring post. Myers hits the floor, more blood pouring down his face. Tytan sees the blood and stares for a minute, then something seems to snap. He grabs a chair and SLAMS it down on Myers head. The referee calls for the bell immediately, but that doesn’t stop Tytan, he keeps hitting Myers with the chair until officials run out and try to restrain him. Tytan easily fights off the officials, and hits them with the chair. Finally Dr. Podvod comes up behind Tytan and injects something in his neck. Tytan raises the chair to hit Myers again, but wobbles a bit, then drops the chair and lurches forward and falls to one knee. Dr. Podvod helps Tytan up and they head to the back, while officials look at Myers, who is slowly back on his feet, much to the delight of the Zaniacs.
WINNER in 6:11 by disqualification – Zane Myers
DH MAGNUSSON vs. SPIN HANSENThe arena goes dark and the first strains of “Immigrant Sons” hit the speakers and the crowd doesn’t know how to respond…half of the crowd cheers the other half look at the entrance ramp with confused looks on their faces.
Out steps DH Magnusson with a smirk on his face and sign that says “Spin is dead”…about half way down the ramp he rips the sign in half and throws it into the crowd. The crowd hates him. He stands and argues with a fan and then as he turns around to continue to walk to the ring….BAM.
Spin hits him with a chair. It looks like Spin snuck in through the crowd and jumped the guardrail. DH struggles to his hand and knees only to be greeted with another chair shot across the back. Spin throws the chair at D.H. and calls for a mic…
He stands over DH and bends down and screams into the mic. “This is NOT over!” In his anger Spin underestimated DH, because DH grabs the chair that Spin threw at him and plants him with a shot right on the head.
Spin goes down and DH struggles to his feet. Both these men look rode hard and put up wet. DH has a road map of bruises on his face from the pay per view and Spin is wrapped up in medical gauze and tape…DH picks Hanson up by the hair and guides him toward the guardrail. Spin meets the guardrail chest first and doubles over and grabs his sides...DH still on the attack grabs Spin and deposits him over the guardrail and into the crowd.
Spin lands head over heels into the first row and the crowd scatters out of the way. DH follows Hanson over the guardrail but Hanson is waiting for him with a fresh beer to the face. I guess the fan won’t be enjoying that one…Spin follows it up with a spinning neck breaker onto a chair and in the ring the referee has called for the bell…this match won’t even get started…OOWF security separate both men, and DH spits at Hanson as they are led away.
THIM REYNOLDS vs. SEAMUS MCNASTY – Steel Cage MatchThis is guaranteed to be a brutal match, with two combatants from two countries with an amazing degree of historical hostilities between them. Not like in that other promotion, where they pair up people from within the different areas of the same country, and call them enemies. No siree, we put real enemies in the ring, here at OOWF.
"Lay Your Hands On Me" fires up, and Thim "The Physio" Reynolds appears to the cheers of the fans. He comes down the ramp, nodding appreciatively to a few small Union Jacks he sees waving. He gets in the ring, and tests the ropes, shaking his arms out, stretching his neck, basically getting ready. The lights dim and "Rebels of the Sacred Heart" begins. The crowd pops, and then remembers that McNasty is a heel, so the cheers turn to boos as he makes his entrance. There's a group of fans near the ramp waving an Irish flag, and he goes over and fist bumps then, then turns to the folks with the Union Jack nearby, grabs their flag-on-a-stick, and tears the flag itself off the stick with his teeth! The boos get louder, but Seamus doesn't care and he spits the flag back at them. This is too much for Reynolds to bear so he slides under the ropes and runs up the ramp to meet Seamus. The two begin exchanging haymakers back and forth, back and forth, working their way down the ramp toward the ring. Once at the ring Reynolds "helps" Seamus in under the ropes, and follows him in. The two continue the punches while the referee makes a signal. The steel cage begins to lower, and as soon as it is in place, the referee calls for the bell, and now we are officially under way.
Thim and Seamus continue to trade the punches, until even they are bored with it. Seamus grabs Thim and Irish whips him into the corner (and don't think either of them don't appreciate the irony there) and follows him in with a big elbow. Thim goes down in a heap, and Seamus pulls him out by his ponytail. The ref admonishes Seamus, who lets go, but not after threatening to backfist the ref into oblivion first. Seamus picks Reynolds up and power slams him back down. He puts a couple of boots to him, which drive Thim back toward the ropes. Thim grabs the ropes and the referee begins the count to back Seamus up. Seamus does so, as Thim pulls himself up using the rope and the cage. Thim is up and heads toward Seamus, who Irish whips him again, into a drop toe-hold, and then into a cross face! It's the Irish Car Bomb. The ref checks on Thim to see if he'll tap, but Britain has never acknowledged defeat before, and it ain't about to start now. With a mighty effort, Thim manages to roll enough to weaken Seamus's hold, and break free. Seamus can't believe it, and both men get to their feet, Thim a bit more slowly. Thim turns away to clear the cobwebs, and then turns back just in time to see Seamus running toward him. But he's not that out of it, and bends down to back body drop Seamus. The Irish man goes down with a resounding thud that shakes the cage. This time, it's Thim's turn to "lay his boots on him," and he does so. He reaches down and grabs for Seamus's leg to get it into the Reflex-o-Lock, but just as Thim did before, Seamus is able to move around enough that he can't get the hold. Reynolds drops the foot, and steps back, then lands a Chirobow in frustration, straight to McNasty's back. He pulls McNasty up and chop-wooo-chop-woo-chop-woo into the ropes and into the cage. He grabs an arm and twists it behind McNasty's back into an arm lock, and runs him straight across the ring into the cage, face first. He pushes hard on the back of McNasty's head, leaving the imprint of the cage in the Irishman's cheek. McNasty struggle with the arm lock at first, and then remembers he has another arm, and tosses his elbow back toward Reynold's head. Once, twice, and it connects. Reynolds falls back, holding his jaw. Seamus rushes him but Reynolds grabs him into the Neck Cracker. He's really torquing Seamus's neck, and Seamus grabs the arm to try and pry it free, but no dice. The referee checks on Seamus, but it looks like he's fading. The referee raises his arm once. It falls. Twice! This could be it! There's no life left in McNasty. The ref raises his arm a third time and it falls...NO! Just as it is almost too late, McNasty appears to have rallied! The spirit of Bobby Sands moves through him, as he works against Reynolds and then finally creates enough space to toss his head back and head butt Reynolds in the face. Reynolds staggers back, as a little bit of blood begins to flow from his nose. McNasty whirls around, kicks Reynolds in the stomach, and gets him into position for the Black and Tan (how appropriate!). He lets it go, and Reynolds is down. Seamus makes the pin and one-two-NO! Reynolds gets a shoulder up. Seamus grabs him again and sets him up for the Celtic Cross (crucifix power bomb) except he's got him backward. And he's close to the rope....Seamus lets him fly....and Reynolds lands face first against the cage. Seamus takes the back of his head and cheese-graters it across the wires, spreading the blood from Reynolds' nose around. He pulls Reynolds back and goes for another pin, one-two-NO! Again, Reynolds kicks out. Seamus is enraged and confronts the referee, asking him if he knows how to count. While his back is turned, Reynolds is recovering. He grabs Seamus by the neck for the Nerve Pinch, and Seamus's arm goes limp. Reynolds puts the pressure on and drives Seamus down to his knees. He grabs Seamus by the head, puts on the Neck Cracker again, but this time works it round into the Neck Cutter. Seamus is down, Reynolds goes for the pin, one-two-NO! Seamus just barely gets up in time. Reynolds stands, and then paces around the ring, wondering what it will take. He goes toward Seamus again, but Seamus sees him coming, and gets him down with a drop toe hold. It's aimed just right too, or just wrong, depending on your perspective, because it also knocks down the referee. Reynolds gets up and goes to check on the referee. He turns around and Seamus hits him right between the eyes, with the Brass Knuckles! Reynolds goes down! Seamus puts the boots to him a couple more times, then rouses the referee. Seamus goes over for the pin. The referee is suspicious that some sort of shenanigans have happened, but absent any proof, he makes the count. One...two...THREE!
WINNER in 12:49 – Seamus McNasty
<“We have some backstage footage that happened during the last match we wanted to show you now. Roll the tape…”>
We see DH sitting on a chair backstage getting his head stitched up from the chair shot earlier, out of nowhere we see Spin Hanson fly into the scene knocking DH and the doctor over and proceeding to land haymakers on DH.
DH begins choking Hanson and both men roll around on the floor. They struggle to their feet and DH whips Hanson into a locker. Hanson’s head bounces off the locker and leaves a blood steak down the door. DH grabs Hanson and both men trade punches as the stagger through the locker room door and down the hall. Hanson grabs a lighting rig and swings wildly at DH catching him on the shoulder and knocking him to his knees. Down the hall they go finally spilling into the catering area.
DH grabs Spin and throws him at the drink area, coffee, tea, and soda spill onto the floor covering Spin, his arm turns a bright red from a coffee burn and he charges DH, spearing him through the food table. DH and Spin are covered with food and both try desperately to regain their feet. Spin grabs DH and pushes his face ever closer to a lit Sterno. Ouch, DH gets a nice silver dollar size burn mark on his cheek. Spin is trying to force him down for another burn when DH blocks him and finding a chicken drumstick hits him in the eye. Oh my God a Drumstick to the eye…Spin recoils in pain, grabbing at his eye…OOWF security finally separate the two men again and we see Spin taken to a waiting ambulance. Spin is ushered into the back seat holding his eye and screaming at DH….”This is NOT over”
IHOP vs. THE HEROES GUILD vs. ALEXANDER DARLING, FIREWOMAN & CHRIS EVANS – Non-Title Campeonas de Trios MatchThe Heroes Guild are announced first, and Bryce Larson, Nayr and Blitz sprint to the ring and slide under the bottom rope and then leap to the turnbuckles and play to the crowd. The fans cheer them loudly, but those cheers quickly turn to boos when Alexander Darling, Firewoman and Chris Evans are announced. They ignore the boos of the crowd and head to the ring, and go right to their corner to discuss some strategy. Finally, the OOWF Campeonas de Trios champions IHOP are announced, and they come to the top of the ramp with their entourage, Fezzik, Monkh and the Lovely and Talented Dorothy Mantooth. The crowd breaks into a MOOOOOOOOOOO chant directed at SYB, but he shrugs it off like he has no idea what they are talking about, while the rest of IHOP do their best not to laugh at him. They head to the ring and find their corner, and finally we are underway.
The champions defer, meaning a member of the Run DEA team and a member of the Heroes will have to start. Darling sends Evans into the ring, and “Bulletproof” Bryce Larson grins and steps between the ropes. The two slowly circle and lock up. Neither man can gain an advantage at first, finally Evans snaps Larson over with an arm drag, but Larson springs right back to his feet and catches a charging Evans with a hurracarana. Both men pop back to their feet and Larson grabs a side head lock, but Evans shoves him toward the ropes, where Darling catches him with an elbow to the back of the head. Larson stops and spins around and is about to hammer Darling when Evans catches him from behind with a lung blower. Evans gets to his feet and waits for Larson to get up, but Darling reaches out and tags himself in. Evans looks a little confused, but steps out of the ring without incident. As Larson gets to his feet, Darling charges in and clips his knee, sending him to the mat. Darling immediately grabs Larson’s legs and turns him over into the Money Clip, but Larson doesn’t stay there long. Nayr comes in and forces the break with a kick to Darling’s face.
Larson gets to his feet and reaches out and tags in Skurge. Skurge charges onto the ring and catches Darling with a running shining wizard upside the head that sends Darling staggering into the Heroes corner. Larson, Nayr and Blitz all make sure they get their shots in, Darling turns around and tries to fight them off, but as soon as he hits Blitz, the referee calls that a tag making Blitz the legal man in the ring. Blitz springboards to the top rope and nails Skurge with a missile drop kick and tries a pin, but Skurge kicks out at one.
Skurge gets to his feet and catches a charging Blitz with a hard chop that sends him to the mat. Skurge pulls blitz to his feet and hooks him, then takes him to the mat with a snap suplex. Skurge gets to his feet and hits the ropes and drops a knee across Blitz forehead, then covers, but only gets a one count. Skurge pulls Blitz to a sitting position, then reaches out and tags in The Amnesiac. TA comes into the ring and he and Blitz take turn kicking Blitz, Skurge from the back, TA from the front, until Blitz collapses to the mat dazed. The Amnesiac falls on him for the cover, but Nayr charges into the ring and breaks up the pin at two with a drop kick to TA’s face.
TA gets to his feet and grabs Nayr from behind and throws him over the top rope to the floor. TA turns around just as Blitz is getting to his feet and levels him with a clothesline. TA reaches out and Firewoman tags in, the two of them wait for Blitz to get to his feet again, then hit a double drop kick that sends Blitz to the IHOP corner. SYB reaches down and demands the tag, Blitz shrugs and tags him in. The crowd immediately begins MOOOOOO sounds again. SYB steps between the ropes and Firewoman smirks, until SYB says something and flips her off, then Fire charges across the ring and connects with a forearm to the side of his head. Fire sends SYB to the ropes and catches him on the rebound with a hot shot on the top rope. She grabs SYB’s head while he is on the mat and hammers him with rights to the face.
SYB shoves her off and gets to his feet and ducks a round house kick, and catches Fire with a KICKWHAMSTUNNER! SYB covers, but Fire kicks out at two. SYB reaches back and tags in Skurge, he comes in and grabs Fire’s legs, and catapults her up, RIGHT INTO A HEBREW HAMMER! Skurge covers Fire, and gets a two count before Evans comes in and breaks it up. Skurge pulls Fire to her feet and hits a Northern Lights suplex, then heads to the top rope. Before he can do anything though, Fire gets to her feet and runs to the corner and catches Skurge and hits a release belly to belly suplex! Fire hits hard, and after her match at MADNESS she has to be hurting. She slowly gets to her feet and waits for Skurge to get up, but Nayr reaches out and tags himself in. Fire looks annoyed and barks something at Nayr, Nayr shrugs it off, so Fire grabs him and spins him around and throws a right at his head, but Nayr ducks and hits a spinning heel kick that sends Fire over the top rope to the floor.
With Nayr distracted, Skurge grabs him from behind and hits a trio of German suplexes, bridging the last one and trying for the pin, but Nayr rolls his shoulder just before the three count. Skurge tags SYB back in, and he grabs Nayr in a side head lock and tries an ACID DROP, but Nayr throws him off to the mat. Nayr waits by the ropes for SYB to get to his feet, but a clearly pissed off Firewoman runs down the apron and clotheslines Nayr, sending him into the DEA corner, where Evans makes the tag just before Darling can. Evans comes into the ring and kicks SYB low and connects with a PACKAGE PILEDRIVER! He covers, but The Amnesiac comes in and breaks it up. This leads to all the teams coming into the ring in a huge schmozz brawl. As the bodies slowly tumble out of the ring, we are left with just SYB and Evans in the ring. Evans waits for SYB then hits the ICARUS WINGS and goes for the cover, but Alexander Darling hops on the apron and screams at Evans to tag him in. Evans reluctantly gets to his feet and tags in Darling. Alexander pulls SYB to his feet and hits the CRUCIFIX BOMB, covers, and gets the one, two, three!
WINNERS in 19:11 – Firewoman, Chris Evans and Alexander Darling
<“Ladies and gentleman we have breaking news we need to take you to right now…”>
Camera opens and we see a white SUV slamming into an ambulance running it off the street and into a road sign.
The door from the damaged SUV opens and out steps DH Magnusson, he is limping and covered in food and blood, he carries a sledge hammer in his hand. DH walks to the back of the ambulance and begins pounding on the back doors, busting the glass and beating the doors in. “ Hanson come out and play….oh Hanson come out and play…”
Just then the doors burst open and the gurney comes rolling out like a comet…hitting DH in the chest and rolling over him, Hanson follows and hits DH with a Lou Thesz press. “Ahhhhhhh” Hanson is clubbing DH with lefts and rights…until he is hauled off by two local policemen and put in handcuffs and thrown against the ground. At the same time DH is turned over and placed into handcuffs…bleeding and hair down in his face DH grins, spits a mouthful of blood and yells at Spin…”This ain’t over”…
MATTE vs. CONCRETE TG – OOWF Onslaught Championship Match"I Hate Myself and Want To Die" by Nirvana blares through the arena, as Matte makes his way to the ring, with the Onslaught Championship draped over his shoulder (plates facing to the back). Matte immediately sits down in the corner, awaiting his opponent. Joe Satriani's "With Jupiter in Mind" leads Concrete Takaken Gryfon to the ring. CTG immediately hops over the top rope, landing to set off more pyro. Matte remains in the corner, unimpressed with all the pyro.
Hightower checks both competitors, and our Onslaught Championship match has gotten started! At least, for CTG, as Matte simply stays put in the corner. Hightower repeatedly calls for Matte to come out, but Matte doesn't. CTG decides to take matters into his own hands, extending out a handshake of respect to Matte. Matte, however, refuses.
Two minutes into the match, and nary a maneuver even tried by both men. CTG tries once more to shake hands with Matte, so CTG tries a different approach. CTG bounces off of the ropes and dropkicks the seated Matte right in the face! This sends Matte to the floor. Matte pops up, looking at CTG with a look of disdain. Matte grabs a chair and tosses it into the ring, which CTG promptly kicks out the other end. Matte then pulls a table out from under the ring! The crowd pops for the table, and Matte starts to set it up. CTG complains to Hightower, who tries to talk to Matte, but he simply ignores it and continues to set-up the table. CTG decides to take matters into his own hands and flies through the middle ropes, connecting with a Heat Seeking Missile! The table falls and they both crash into the guardrail!
Hightower hits the floor to check on both of them as they get to their feet. It appears that both have been cut (hard way), and Matte is especially bloody already. Seems like he's a bleeder! CTG rolls Matte back in the ring, but Matte kicks him away and rolls back out, preferring to fight right there on the floor. Matte slugs CTG in the face, and CTG responds with a forearm to the jaw. Matte takes it, laughs and punches CTG in the face again! CTG responds with another forearm that staggers Matte, but he punches CTG in the face a third time! Matte then screams to CTG "Punch me! Punch me!" CTG responds by leveling Matte with a forearm to the face that sends Matte down to a knee. Matte uses the ring apron and pulls himself up, maniacally looking at CTG. "I said punch me! C'mon, punch me 'Crete!" CTG rears back and nearly knocks Matte clean out with a forearm to the side of the head, and Matte slowly falls to the floor.
Hightower gets CTG back into the ring, and checks on Matte. Hightower then gets in the ring himself and starts the count out on Matte. Matte finally gets to a knee, then to his feet and barely makes it back in before being counted out. CTG immediately covers for two. CTG stays on top, pushing Matte's shoulders down for a second near fall, then a third. CTG finally picks Matte up, who seems out on his feet. CTG backs up to one corner, charging and connecting with a Spear that takes Matte out of his boots! Cover by CTG, and it only gets two! Matte starts to get up, and CTG connects with a Dragon Suplex! Cover...1...2...No! Matte kicks out yet again! CTG shows some signs of fruatration, but regains his composure and picks up Matte for a standing suplex. Crete holds on, popping them back for another suplex. Crete holds on yet again, hitting a third suplex for the Three Amigos! The crowd appropriately chants "Ed-dee! Ed-dee! Ed-dee!" in response. Crete, taking their inspiration, climbs up top, flying off and landing a frog splash on Matte! Crete hurts himself (think RVD), and both men are down for nearly a minute. Crete finally crawls over and covers Matte, but only gets two.
They get to their feet, and Matte gets the first shot in, punching Crete right in the face! Crete shakes his head, rears back for another forearm, but Matte ducks! This sends Crete through the ropes, but he catches himself and is standing on the apron. Matte comes over, but Crete catches him in position for a suplex! Crete looks behind and realizes the table Matte set-up earlier is right behind them, and signals for a suplex through the table! The crowd pops for CTG! Matte blocks the first attempt, and then blocks the second. CTG finally gets Matte up, but Matte shifts his weight in mid-air, and both go crashing through the table as Matte connects with a Tornado Whatever DDT on CTG through the table on the floor! Hightower heads outside to check on both men as the bell rings! Time has expired in the match!
WINNER in 15:00 - TIME LIMIT DRAW
<“Folks we want to apologize to the wrestlers and fans of the OOWF, tonight’s show has been constantly disrupted by the antics of DH Magnusson and Spin Hanson but I’m being told we have a live feed at the police station and we need to join the action there already in progress…”>
Camera opens and we see DH Magnusson and Spin Hanson at the processing center at the local police station. Spin in sitting in a chair at the end of a counter, with his hands between his knees handcuffed. He is bleeding and bruised, his eye is swelled shut…standing at the other end of the counter is DH, also blooded and bruised and his shirt in tatters. Beside him a cop is pressing his fingers onto the ink pad and then onto the fingerprint card.
All of a sudden DH head butts the cop in the face and charges Hanson. DH spears Hanson, Hanson still in handcuffs hits DH with a double axe handle on the back. The two roll around on the floor with DH choking Hanson and Hanson using his elbows to try to get DH off of him. Finally DH stands up and grabs the APB printer off the counter to use on Spin but another policeman rushes in to separate the two men and is met with the printer right in the face…
The officer stumbles into the camera man and the camera falls to the floor, from a weird camera angle…the picture is now full of static and we see three swat officers in full riot gear enter the room and we hear one of the officers yell “fire” and we see both Spin and DH hit with Tazers…both men begin screaming and the camera goes dark…
“We want to apologize to our viewers for that graphic scene…We have lost our feed but one thing I can guarantee, this isn’t over between these two”
POE vs. STANK – OOWF World Heavyweight Title MatchStank makes his way to the ring first, determination etched on his face. He stares stoically up the aisle as Poe, accompanied by Selena, makes his entrance. Poe pauses for a moment at the top of the ramp and holds the World Championship high before handing it to Selena and striding down the aisle. They climb in the ring and Poe stands toe to toe with Stank as Selena hands the belt to referee Davis Hightower. Hightower gives the combatants their instructions, displays the belt to the crowd, and calls for the bell.
Stank shoots the leg and takes Poe to the mat. He tries to twist him into an ankle lock, but Poe delivers a solid kick to the head with his free leg. Stank goes down, but hangs on to Poe's foot and manages to lock in a knee bar. Stank struggles and manages to grab the ropes, but before Hightower can call for the break, Poe uses the ropes to roll himself over and kicks his way free. Stank rolls to his feet and chop blocks Poe as he pulls himself to his feet. Stank drags Poe to the middle of the ring and drives an elbow into the inside of his knee, followed by a second and a third. He tries to lock in a figure four, but Poe rolls him up and gets a two count.
Stank gets immediately to his feet and moves in, but Poe levers himself up with the ropes and catches him with a kick to the stomach and follows up with a DDT. He plants a foot in Stank's back and pulls back his arms, trying for a submission. Hightower asks Stank if he wants to quit, and if he can actually do what Stank says in response, he belongs in a circus in Amsterdam. Poe realizes that a submission just isn't going to happen and hits a curb stomp, and when Stank rolls over, blood is pouring from his nose. Poe pounces, and starts driving forearms into Stank's face. He pulls Stank to his feet and sends him to ropes. Stank ducks a clothesline attempt and comes back with a shoulder block that knocks Poe off balance. He drags Poe onto his shoulders for the Stank-U, but Poe shifts his weight and turns it into a crucifix pin for a one count.
Both men are up and start throwing punches. Stank gains the advantage and backs Poe into the corner. An Irish whip is reversed and Stank hits the corner hard. Poe follows him in, but Stank dodges out of the way, turns, and clips Poe's knee, sending him back to the mat. Stank pins Poe's ankle down and stomps on it, then locks on a spinning toehold. Poe manages to free himself, but is definitely the worse for wear and drags himself under the ropes to the floor. Stank starts to follow, and Hightower moves to block, but Stank shoots him a look, and Hightower is quick to change his mind. Stank drops to the floor and sprints around the ring, steamrolling into Poe and driving him face-first into the ring post. Poe staggers back and Stank drops him with an inverted DDT. He hauls the bloodied champion to his feet and braces him against the ring apron before driving his shoulder repeatedly into Poe's midsection. Stank shoves the champion under the ropes and slides into the ring behind him. He tries for a suplex but Poe blocks. Poe attempts to reverse, but the damaged leg buckles and Stank lands on top of him, hooking the leg and getting a two count.
Stank rolls to his feet and kicks Poe in the head to keep him down. He stretches out Poe's leg and delivers a series of shots, then goes to the ropes and hits the Stankonia 2.0 on the leg. He goes to the well for a second one, but Poe gets his good leg in the way and raises Stank's voice by an octave. Stank topples to the mat, and Poe pulls himself to his feet. Poe backs the big man into a corner and blisters him with chops then starts an Irish whip. He puts on the brakes and sends Stank hard into the corner chest first, then clamps on a dragon sleeper.. Stank reaches for the ropes, but it's just a little too far. Hightower lifts the arm once, twice, thr – Stank raises his arm! A series of well placed elbows break the hold, but Poe spins him into a belly to belly suplex. The impact jars Poe as well, and he's slow to make a cover. Hightower counts, but Stank kicks out at two.
Poe shoves Stank back into a corner and starts up again with chops. Stank fights back, exchanging chop for chop, then manages to grab Poe and reverse their positions. He backs up a few steps and avalanches Poe in the corner, then sits him on the top rope. Stank climbs up and tries to set up a superplex, but Poe fights back. Stank teeters, but Poe stops him from falling, then wraps a hand around his neck and drives him to the mat with a choke slam. He drags himself over and covers, and Hightower counts one...two...thr-Stank kicks out!
Poe snarls and drags Stank into a sitting position. He delivers a brutal kick to the back, followed by an echoing kick to the sternum. Stank falls back to the mat and rolls over, and Poe drives a leg drop into the back of his neck. He drags Stank to his feet and lifts him into position for the Pendulum, but staggers as his leg starts to give out. The delay allows Stank to shift his weight and reverse the move into a DDT. He pulls Poe to his feet and backs him to the ropes with a series of forearms. He sends Poe hobbling across the ring and plants him with a spine buster. Stank bounces to his feet, rebounds off the ropes, and hits a thunderous splash. He hooks the leg and Hightower counts one...two...thr-Poe rolls a shoulder!
Stank connects with a haymaker as Poe gets to his feet, and Poe responds in kind. Each man is increasingly staggered by each punch, until Stank ducks a shot and hits an atomic drop. He rebounds off the ropes and levels him with a clothesline. He takes Poe over with a suplex, then sends him to the ropes and hoists him for the Stank-U. Poe reaches out and manages to grab the top rope to block. Stank yanks him away and hits the move, but he's off balance and doesn't get all of it. He hooks the leg, but again Poe rolls a shoulder just before three.
Stank is up first and kicks Poe in the stomach. He tries for a power bomb, but Poe drops to one knee to block. Stank lets go and drives a double axe handle into Poe's back, driving him to the mat. He scrapes Poe up and tries an Irish whip, but Poe reverses, snapping him over with a power slam on the return trip. Poe Drags Stank to his feet and hoists him up – Pendulum! Poe rolls Stank over and hooks both legs. Hightower counts one...two...three!
WINNER, and still OOWF World Heavyweight Champion, in 22:45, Poe!
CHRIS COLE vs. DAVIN MORELAND – Retirement Cage MatchOne of these two in this next match must leave OOWF forever, after Davin goaded Cole into action at the Grand Slam Ceremony at “Madness”. However, this was the Intercontinental Champion's idea, so one of these two OOWF legends will be going home, much to the crowd's consternation. In fact, they're not really sure who to cheer for, but when “Master of Puppets” fires up over the sound system, and “The Main Event” Chris Cole makes his way down the ramp, the crowd erupts in applause. He climbs in the ring and poses a little bit with the Intercontinental Title. “Notorious” fires up now, and there are noticeably less boos than normal. Davin Moreland, waits for the ostentatious pyro to complete before coming down the ramp alone again; anticipating a dangerous situation for Samantha it would seem. He climbs into the ring and starts yapping at Cole right away, in fact, yapping at him WHILE he does his full 4 corner pose thing. Davin's finally done and Senior Referee Davis Hightower makes a signal to the back. We've got CAGE MUSIC and it slowly lowers around the ring, and one can't help but to flash back to the best-of-seven these two had a while back, culminating in a classic cage match. These two have, of course, had many classics over the years, but this one will be the last one. Hightower calls for the bell, and WE'RE UNDERWAY!
The two combatants slowly circle each other, and the trash talk, as you'd imagine, is flying back and forth, and this time it's complete with wild, broad gesturing and finger-pointing in each other's faces. Looking to break the stalemate, Davin unleashes a SLAP OF DISRESPECT! Instead of talking however, when Cole wheels around from the impact, Davin tries for a Really Good Diamond Cutter. Cole is just able to shove him off, followed by an Enziguri which sends Davin to the mat as that one really connected. Cole covers and that gets a one count before he is shoved off hard. Cole tries to drop a knee to Davin's head, but Davin grabs Cole's foot, and locks in the Sharpshooter! Davin is trying for the submission, but it’s an easy reach for the ropes for Cole. Davin uses the whole 5-count, but breaks the hold. The two men look to lock up and do so. Davin obviously gains the advantage, but Cole does some innovation and hits a Low Dropkick to the side of Davin's knee, sending him face-first to the mat. Cole rolls out the back side and grabs Davin's foot, and he locks on a Texas Cloverleaf! Both men are trying for submission early, but much like a couple of minutes ago, Davin is very close to the ropes and easily reaches out to get them. Like Davin did, Cole uses the whole 5-count before having to be assisted in breaking the hold by Hightower. Davin looks unhappy by this turn of events, but calls for another lockup. Cole complies and walks in quickly for the lockup, but Davin instead just ROCKS him with a vicious uppercut!
Cole was caught by surprise with that one, and he does a 180 and his eyes roll back in his head. Davin decides it's not time to end things yet, so he grabs Cole on his shoulder, and LAWN DARTS him into the cage! Cole bounces awkwardly off the cage, but Davin is there to catch him, and then WHIPS him to the far side of the cage, and Cole smashes into it. Davin's there to catch him again, and does some cheese-grating spots with Cole, and he is opened up. Davin sets Cole in front of him, and Release German Suplex into the cage! Cole tumbles over lifeless near the middle of the ring, and Davin is climbing the cage! He's not going to take the shitty way out and win by escape, is he? Well he gets to the top...steadies himself, and looks back into the ring! Look out! Davin takes off with a Hesitation Shooting Star Press from the top of the cage...and EATS CANVAS! Cole is JUST able to move or he would have been dead, you know, kinda like Davin is right now. They call it high-risk for a reason folks.
Cole looks at the carcass of Davin, and starts dropping knees to the back of Davin's head. That can't feel good. He heads to the second rope and takes off, drilling Davin in the back of the head with a Hart Elbow. He goes to pull Davin up and does so. He whips Davin into the ropes and follows him. He nearly DECAPITATES him with a clothesline, and Davin flips into the cage. Cole does some cheese grating spots of his own, and now Davin is busted open. Slingshot Suplex by Cole looks just devastating and Davin splats on his back in the middle of the ring. Cole raises his arms over his head, thinking it's over. He goes for the academic cover...1...2....NO! Davin kicked out and Cole has a priceless look of shock on his face. Cole goes back to work with more knees to the back of the head. I'm sure that feels great. Cole pulls Davin up and locks him in...is he going to try for a Power bomb? Wait, he hooks Davin's arms! He won't...He will! PEDIGREE! Cole covers and Davin's going to retire...1....2...NO! Davin kicked out of the Pedigree! Cole is shocked and now infuriated. He pulls Davin up and destroys him with a DDT. Cole runs the ropes and hits a Double Leg Drop. He covers again...1...2...NO! Cole appears less shocked now, just pissed. More knees to the head, and he pulls Davin up....WAY up...he turns him out toward the crowd and this should do it! HEADLINER! Cole covers! 1...2...thre...NO! NO! Davin kicked out of the Headliner! Cole can't believe it and he's beside himself!
Cole is screaming in the face of Davis Hightower, who has to point to the OOWF logo on his shirt to settle things down. Cole isn't relenting, and he also doesn't see Davin who pulls Cole down with a Schoolboy Rollup! 1...2...Cole just does kick out and this just enrages him further. It looks like he's going to drop another knee again, but Davin grabs Cole's ankle and stands up, shaking his head, face covered in blood. Cole tries for an Enziguri, but Davin ducks it, and when Cole comes back around, Davin hits a devastating Dragon Screw which has Cole clutching his knee. Davin smirks, and quickly locks Cole in the Sharpshooter again! Davin REALLY torques back on it, and Cole is in a lot of pain. In fact, Cole is in the hold for 3 or 4 minutes before he somehow gets to the ropes, and Hightower breaks up the hold. When Hightower does so, Davin thinks he's won, so he climbs up on the cage and starts celebrating. Hightower is trying to get his attention to let him know that the match is still going on, but it's no use. Cole limps slightly as he makes his way over to Davin's position, and Davin realizes the match is still going on when Cole hits a Running Power bomb off the Cage! Ouch. Cole covers, 1...2...NO! Davin kicks out again and Cole has a big smile on his face, thinking he really had him that time. Cole mounts Davin and starts whaling away on his face with some Greco-Roman Closed Fist Lefts and Rights. He's rocking the big man, as he has most of the match. He tries for a cover, hooking both legs and a forearm in Davin's face...1...2...NO! Davin again kicks out, but this time Cole doesn't delay.
Cole quickly goes to Davin's legs, and once again locks on his Texas Cloverleaf, and he's got it on well, in the middle of the ring. Davin's in big time trouble, as he struggles, bloodied, to get to the ropes. Cole is sporting the crimson mask as well, pulling back on the hold for all he's worth. 5 full minutes go by, and Davin has never tapped out to anyone, although the pain is starting to overcome him. Desperately, Davin dives for the ropes and gets there. Hightower comes in to break the hold, and much like Davin a few minutes before, Cole thinks he's won. He jumps up and down and celebrates but Hightower is able to get to Cole and explain that the match will continue. Cole switches back into anger mode, and goes over to Davin who is on his knees facing away from him. Cole leans in to attack and takes an elbow to the gut. As if in a slo-mo replay, the same thing happens again. Davin leaps up and hits a Neck breaker, but both men are down. Hightower starts a count. At 6, Davin is up and has to wipe the blood out of his eyes before going over to Cole. He grabs Cole by the back of the head, finds out where he's bleeding from, and starts biting. Ew, that's gross. Davin spits Cole's blood into the air, and Cole's head is now a leaky faucet. Davin whips Cole to the ropes and Davin catches him. AA Spine buster! Davin screams primally and runs toward the ropes. Springboard Moonsault! Davin covers, 1...2...NO! Cole kicks out! This time it's Davin with the shocked face, but he doesn't stop and whips Cole into the corner. Davin hoists Cole up to the top turnbuckle in Superplex position. He spins Cole around and holds him under his arm, his head facing up. Look out, this could do it...Davin jumps...SWEET DREAMS! Davin covers and counts with the ref...1...2...thr...NO! NO! Cole rolled the shoulder and now Davin can't believe it! Davin is in Hightower's face, and Cole sneaks behind and tries to roll him up. But, Davin reaches down and GOOZLES Cole, pulling him up through his legs by his throat. Davin flips the arm over...CHOKE SLAM!
Davin makes the international sign for “That's It” and pulls Cole up again, perhaps for one last time. Davin whips Cole to the ropes, and Davin hits the opposite ropes...REALLY GOOD DIAMOND CUTTER! That HAS to be it. 1....2....thre...NO! NO! NO! Somehow Cole kicked out! Davin Moreland has lost it and starts talking to himself. He goes to the nearest turnbuckle and starts smashing it with his fists and smashing his head into the cage. Dude. Chill. Finally he seems to get it out of his system, and turns around to see Cole's feet flying at his head, smashing him in the face after Cole hits a dropkick. Davin slumps a little in the corner. Cole shrugs as if to say, “no time like the present”, and gets Davin all the way up, faced toward the crowd, and HITS THE HEADLINER! Cole pumps his fist and hooks the leg...1...2...NO! NO! NO! Davin kicked out of the Headliner AGAIN! This time it's Cole with the Hissy Fit, and starts flipping out and punching Davin wildly in the face. We are able to hear “Die! Die! Why don't you just die?” Eventually, Davin GOOZLES Cole again, and sits up, and then stands up, looking to choke slam him again. Davin flips the arm over and gets him up, and Cole REVERSES into a TOR-NA-DO DDT attempt, but Davin manages to shove him off, and hits a REALLY GOOD DIAMOND CUTTER! That's it! 1...2....NO! NO! NO! Cole kicked out of a second Diamond Cutter! Now Davin seems to have suffered a psychotic break with reality, and starts throwing Cole around the ring like a rag doll. Finally Davin tosses Cole into the corner and starts blasting him with punches, until Cole POKES HIM IN THE EYE! Davin stumbles around. Cole jumps over Davin's back and uses his momentum to get him up for a Third Headliner! He's in position, and uses some extra height to give it a little more power and...DAVIN REVERSES INTO A REALLY GOOD DIAMOND CUTTER! 1...2...3! That's it! Just like that it's over!
WINNER by PINFALL in 42:18...Davin Moreland!
Post-match, the cage is raised, and it appears like both men are on the mat talking to each other for a bit. Cole looks like he tries to shake him off of something, but Davin crawls to the timekeeper and calls for a mic. He gets it, and immediately the crowd starts booing, expecting some long-winded douchey speech that amounts to “Ha!”
DM: Wait a second...hold on now...Security, do you have her?Some random security guy from the ramp gives him a thumbs up.
DM: OK, good. Folks tonight I'm going to do something that's frowned upon in our business and that's called “Breaking Kayfabe”. I have to do that so you folks can understand what a great guy Chris Cole is...The crowd is stunned into silence.
DM: Yeah, you heard me right. Davin Moreland the character has never gotten along with “The Main Event” Chris Cole, But Davin Moreland the man, has nothing but the utmost respect and appreciation for Chris ColeMild Cheering.
DM: When I was a nothing, a nobody, and I was trying to comeback from some serious problems, Chris Cole saw something in me that no one else did. What happened next was one of the longest feuds in OOWF history, behind only Crete and Moose, right Chris?Chris Cole nods and smiles on the mat, sitting up.
DM: What Chris Cole said at the Grand Slam ceremony was absolutely correct. He DID make me. He did give me the rub and he did put me over in a way no one else could have. Chris Cole has won every title there is to win in this company, and because of his compassion and unselfishness, he's as responsible as anyone for making me a 3-time World Champion. Chris, it's an honor and a privilege that you asked me to wrestle in your retirement match, and I am forever grateful. Stand up and be recognized for your achievements.The crowd gets to their feet and gives a long 2-minute ovation, complete with a “Please Don't Go” chant. Davin raises Cole's arm several times, and it seems like it's time for this to wrap up.
DM: Oh...wait wait wait...hold on a second Chris, I have one more surprise for you...Come on out, boys...To “Master of Puppets”, every all-time member of the influential Three-Piece Set comes down the ramp. Ax-Man, Firechild, Chris Alt, Hardbody Harris and Harper Camby all make their way down, to a monster ovation. Cole appears overjoyed as they all surround him, and the old Team Hardbody members Hardbody Harris and Davin Moreland share a few minutes. Everyone is raising their hands and accepting the accolades. The camera pulls back for a wide-angle shot of the scene, and we fade to commercial.
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