OOWF MidWeek Mayhem
Live! From Hollywood, Pennsylvania
DH MAGNUSSON vs. ECOSYSTEMDH Magnusson makes his way to the ring first. He steps between the ropes and heads to the corner and waits for Ecosystem to show up. Eco is announced and he makes his way to the ring and slides under the bottom rope and DH immediately attacks him, connecting with a boot right to the ribs before Eco can get off the mat. DH pulls him to his feet and shoves him into the corner and follows him in with a running forearm to the head. Magnusson wraps his hands around Eco’s throat and chokes him in the corner until the referee threatens disqualification. Magnusson breaks for a moment, then grabs Eco by the throat again and throws him out of the corner. Magnusson waits for Eco to get to his feet, then charges out of the corner and connects with a big boot to the face, sending Eco to the mat and out of the ring. Eco hits the floor hard and remains on his hands and knees shaking the sense back into his head. Magnusson charges across the ring and steps between the ropes and jumps to the floor. As he hits the floor, Eco gets to his feet and slides back into the ring. Magnusson looks annoyed and climbs back into the ring, and Eco slides back to the floor. Now Magnusson is clearly annoyed. Once again he leaves the ring and Eco slides back into the ring. As Magnusson tries to step between the ropes this time, Eco catches him with a kick to the gut, then stands him up and clotheslines him to the mat. Eco pulls Magnusson to the middle of the ring and covers, but DH kicks out at two. Eco pulls him to his feet and hits an inverted atomic drop, then bounds off the ropes and takes Magnusson to the mat with a leg lariat. Eco heads to the corner and climbs to the second rope and waits for DH to get to his feet, when he does, Eco leaps and nails an elbow right between Magnusson’s eyes, sending him to one knee. Eco hits the ropes and connects with a shining wizard upside Magnusson’s head, sending him to the mat. Eco covers again, but once again only gets a two count. Both men get to their feet and Eco grabs an arm wringer and heads to the corner, leaps to the top rope and tries to snap off a hurracarna, but DH holds on and runs Eco into the corner and SLAMS him into the turnbuckles. Eco staggers out of the corner and Magnusson bounds off the ropes and connects with a clothesline from hell that turns Eco inside out. Magnusson covers, but Eco rolls his shoulder at two. Magnusson keeps Eco on the mat by wrapping his hand around his throat and HAMMERS him with straight rights to the face. The referee warns Magnusson but DH laughs at him and pulls Eco to his feet, hooks him for a suplex, then drops him stomach first on the top rope. Magnusson then hits the ropes and connects with a knee lift that sends Eco off the ropes to the floor, slamming hard onto the concrete. Magnusson leaves the ring and grabs Eco and slams his head into the guard rail then tries to send him into the stairs, but Eco reverses it and sends DH SLAMMING into the stairs. Eco grabs a chair and opens it and sets it on the floor, gets a running start and leaps off the chair at Magnusson, but DH side steps and Eco SLAMS into the ring post! Eco falls to the floor, and instead of rolling him into the ring, Magnusson grabs him and hammers him with shots to the face. Without even realizing it, the referee hits ten, and both men are counted out.
WINNER – Double count out in 10:54
DH gets up, grabs the chair and folds it back up. As Eco struggles to his feet, Magnusson swings the chair and brings it down HARD right on top of Eco’s head! Eco collapses to the floor, out cold and bleeding. DH tosses the chair aside and looks down at Eco “welcome back kid” then walks to the back.
OOWF Tournament for the Titles FinalsCONCRETE TG vs. MATTE – Onslaught Championship FinalsMatte makes his way to the ring, and takes his normal seat in the corner. Concrete TG makes his way down next, but seems distracted as his stable seems to be crumbling around him. The Ring Announcer completes the introductions as Russ & Razz run down the rules.
Russ: It’s Concrete TG versus Matte, and the winner gets an Onslaught Championship Match!
Razz: That’s right Russ, there is a lot on the line, and it’s very important that each man remembers the very specific rules that this match carries.
Russ: Razz, those rules are as follows…for starters, each man gets three rope breaks.
Razz: Yup, and once those are all used up, the ropes cannot be used for a break, and those same ropes are in play for your opponent to use.
Russ: The competitors also get three warnings for the use of an illegal move, after that, they can be disqualified.
Razz: We also have a strict twenty count on the floor.
Russ: We sure do, Razz. And anyone intentionally getting counted out or disqualified can be stripped of his title or any future title shots.
Razz: Russ, the wrestlers are ready, the fans are ready, I’m ready…are you ready?
Russ: I am 100% ready Razz, let’s do this!Crete goes to shake hands with Matte to start, who simply grabs the arm, rolls Crete over and locks in a cross arm breaker, 10 seconds into the match! Crete is stuck, and has no choice but to inch towards the ropes. Crete looks around for another way to break the move without getting the ropes, but sees none. After over a minute, CTG is left with no option but to use the ropes to break.
Ring Announcer: Concrete TG has been charged with his first rope break.CTG makes it to his feet, and is met with literally 20 kicks to the gut from Matte. CTG looks ready to throw up, and Matte locks in a DDT. Crete blocks it once, then once more. Matte shifts his weight, taking Crete over and locking in a guillotine choke. Matte seemingly has it locked in tight, but Crete is n the middle of the ring and tries to fight out. CTG finally makes it to his feet, but is now supporting all of Matte’s weight. CTG doesn’t see an easy way out, so he takes chooses the hard road, connecting with a Northern Lights Suplex. The referee starts counting, but Matte rolls through, coming back out on top with the choke locked in tighter.
‘Crete continues to fight through the move, finally making it to his own feet, still holding Matte up. CTG pushes both men into the corner, with Matte connecting first. The referee sees them in the corner, and calls for the break, charging CTG his second break of the match! During the break, Matte punches CTG square in the face, which also draws a warning.
Ring Announcer: Concrete TG has been charged with his second rope break. Matte has been issued a warning for use of a closed fist, his first warning.The referee returns from informing the ring announcer of the break & warning, and sees Matte unloading on CTG with right hands in the corner! The referee steps in between both men, pushing Matte away from CTG. The referee informs the ring announcer that Matte is charged with warning #2.
Ring Announcer: Matte has been issued his second warning.CTG argues with the referee, claiming that Matte’s actions were worth more than one warning, and he should now be out of warnings. Matte responds by sweeping out CTG’s legs, causing him to fall forward! CTG catches himself and lands on all fours. Matte then sneaks in behind him with a picture perfect La Magistral Cradle!
Russ: It’s a picture perfect La Magistral Cradle!
Razz: From Matte?!
Russ; Yes, from Matte of all people!Crete is tied up like a pretzel in the center of the ring, squirming, but can’t seem to get out as the referee counts…1…2…3!
WINNER in 8:38 – Matte (pin fall via La Magistral Cradle)
CTG stands shocked in the ring, pleading with the referee that he was taken out when discussing the prior ruling. Matte just looks at CTG, smirks, then slumps down in the corner, rolling out of the ring. Matte flips CTG off as he turns and heads to the back.
IHOP vs. THE TEAM FROM DOWN UNDER – World Tag Team Title FinalsIHOP, SYB and Skurge come out first, alone. They are fresh off what has to be considered their biggest upset in team history. They head to the corner and talk some strategy, and surprisingly SYB steps out to the apron letting Skurge start the match. The Team From Down Under are announced and Outback Jack and GatorBait come to the ring. Gator still wears some protection on his throat, having sustained a throat injury at the hands of kz. Gator takes a spot on the apron, how was he even cleared by the medical staff? Jack and Skurge are ready to go, the referee calls for the bell, and we are underway. The two meet in the middle of the ring and lock up, Skurge pushes Jack into the corner and the referee calls for a clean break, he gets it, eventually, and Skurge backs back to the middle of the ring. They meet in the middle of the ring and lock up again, Skurge slips behind Jack and takes him to the mat and grabs a side head lock, but Jack fights right back to his feet and sends Skurge to the ropes. On the rebound Jack catches Skurge with a hip toss, then when Skurge gets to his feet, Jack throws a drop kick, but Skurge side steps it and swats Jack to the mat. Skurge hits the ropes and drops a knee across Jack’s chest and covers, but only gets a one count. Skurge pulls Jack to a sitting position and traps him in a sitting abdominal stretch, then reaches out and tags in SYB. SYB charges into the ring and kicks Jack in the chest, then drops a leg across his chest when he falls to the mat. SYB covers, but only gets a one count. SYB pulls Jack to his feet and catches him with a couple of chops, then tries a whip to the ropes, but Jack reverses it. He lowers his head a moment too soon and SYB puts on the breaks and catches him with a PILEDRIVER! SYB covers, but Jack rolls his shoulder at two. SYB pulls Jack to his feet and backs him into the corner, then scoops him up and ties him in the tree of woe, gets a running start and hits a NICE delayed drop kick to Jack’s face! Where did he learn how to do that? SYB pulls Jack out of the corner and covers, but he gets his boot on the bottom rope just before the three count. SYB pulls Jack to his feet and sends him to the ropes, this time SYB lowers his head a moment too soon and Jack leaps over him with a sunset flip for a two count. Jack rolls to his feet and ducks a clothesline attempt from SYB and spins him around and hits a belly to back suplex, them dives across the ring and makes the tag to GatorBait! The crowd pops as Gator steps between the ropes and immediately levels SYB with a chop. Skurge charges in and Gator elevates him with a back body drop. Gator turns his attention back to SYB and peppers him with rights and lefts, then hits the ropes and charges, but SYB catches him and GUILLOTINES HIM ON THE TOP ROPE! Gator’s head snaps back and he immediately grabs his throat and writhes in pain on the mat. The crowd boos loudly and SYB tags in Skurge. Skurge pulls Gator to his feet and hits a reverse Russian leg sweep, dropping Gator across his throat. Skurge floats over and covers, but Jack comes in and breaks it up at two. Skurge is undeterred and grabs Gator’s legs and flips him over in a sharp shooter, trying for the submission that way, but Gator makes the bottom rope. Skurge reaches out and tags in SYB, then grabs Gator’s legs again and slingshots him up, right into the HEBREW HAMMER! The shot catches Gator right on the throat and he falls to the mat like a sack of potatoes. SYB falls on him and covers, but can only get two. Gator is in a world of trouble right now. He is down on the mat, and SYB gives him a few kicks for good measure. SYB bends down to pull Gator up and Gator grabs him into a SMALL PACKAGE, one, two, THREE! Looks like Gator had a handful of tights there!
WINNERS in 12:41 – The Team From Down Under
Jack and Gator escape from the ring, Gator grabbing his throat the entire time. SYB gets to his feet and goes insane, screaming at the referee, saying something about him being as
blind as a moose. Well that doesn’t make any sense. Before it can get physical, Skurge steps between them and leads SYB to the back.
SEAMUS MCNASTY vs. STANK – Intercontinental Title FinalsRebels of the Sacred Heart” blasts throughout the arena, and Seamus McNasty appears at the top of the ramp to a loud mixed reaction. Either you love him or hate him, and that usually depends on the amount of people of Irish Descent in the audience. Seamus makes his way down without fanfare, and bounces off the ropes a couple of times. No playing to the crowd here, as Seamus looks pretty focused. Suddenly an
Unfamiliar Song comes over the PA system, and a confused Stank comes out to the top of the ramp, looking none too happy. He silently plots revenge against the match writer, and heads down to the ring through his pyro and when the crowd finally realizes it's Stank, cheer their heads off. He re-focuses on his opponent as he gets into the ring, and Fall River's Own Angelo Barros visually inspects both combatants. Satisfied he calls for the bell...WE'RE UNDERWAY!
The two look to lock up, but Seamus instead decides to mock Stank's entrance music. Bad idea, because after all, his name's in the title. Stank goes ballistic (apparently he's grown attached to the song) and starts blasting haymakers at Seamus' head. Finally, Seamus gets caught with a punch on the point of the chin, and he goes down to a knee. Stank slips behind him and hits a Release German Suplex, and Seamus flies across the ring. Stank's on him immediately, and starts stomping away at Seamus until Seamus can get himself out of the ring and out to the floor. Seamus is shaking off the cobwebs, and Stank starts sprinting to the far ropes. He bounces off and is flying the other way...he won't...HE...won't. He fakes the dive over the ropes and laughs his ass off at Seamus who had a look of sheer terror in his eyes briefly. Seamus instructs Barros to hold Stank off as he gets back into the ring. Barros and Stank comply, and we've reset now. The two lock up again, and Stank appears to be getting the best of things until Seamus ole's Stank and sidesteps, shoving Stank into the turnbuckle.
Seamus does some greco-roman Face Smashes into the Turnbuckle, then drops Stank right in the corner with a sweet Inverted DDT. Seamus gets to the 2nd turnbuckle and drops a well-placed knee to Stank's throat. It's time to go old school for Seamus now, and he unleashes the Rocky Road to Dublin with Orton-like precision. He drags a weakened Stank to his feet and WHIPS him to the far ropes. He hits a Drop Toe Hold and he's going for the Irish Car Bomb! However, as Seamus is floating over into the Crossface, Stank slips out and is able to roll up Seamus in a Small Package Variation, and manages to get a 2-count out of it. Seamus is PISSED and just starts blasting Stank in the face with punches, and apparently catches one really well as blood starts to flow from Stank's nose. Eventually, he Stanks Up and just asserts his will again; shoving Seamus into the corner and putting on a boxing clinic. He's working the head. He's working the body. Now he's working the head again and finishes off the flurry with a sweet uppercut. Seamus is reeling. He punches Seamus one more time in the stomach.
Seamus bends over in half, and Stank locks him in. Powerbomb, Powerbomb, STANKBOMB! He hits the near ropes and jumps, hitting the STANKONIA 2.0! Stank thinks that's it, and he covers, but Seamus kicks out. Stank blasts him in the face, indicating he's irritated he got up. He drags a groggy Seamus to his wobbly feet, and delivers a HARD right hand to the point of the chin, and Seamus' eyes roll back in his head. Stank gets into position, and hefts Seamus onto his shoulders. He's going for the STANK-U! But Seamus somehow slips out the back and nails a LUNGBLOWER on his way down. Stank spins around, and so does Seamus. The still-glossy-eyed Seamus grabs Stank's arms and HITS THE BLACK AND TAN! Stank is out, but Seamus is unable to follow up after the beating he's taken. Barros starts a count as both men are down. At 7, Seamus drapes an arm over Stank. 1...2...thr...NO! Stank just rolled the shoulder and we continue on. Seamus uses what's left of his strength to roll Stank over and lock on a CROSSFACE! They're near the ropes, but Seamus has good position, and Stank is in rough shape. It looks bad for Stank, but after a full minute passes, he's able to dive for the ropes and Barros calls for a break. Seamus rolls off irritated, and steps back a bit allowing Stank to pull himself up by the ropes. Barros allows Seamus to attack and he does, charging across the ring at the woozy Stank. Suddenly Stank snaps-to and ducks Seamus getting him on his shoulders! STANK-U! This one is over!
WINNER in 13:21 by PINFALL...Stank!
TYTAN vs. SPIN HANSEN – World Heavyweight Title FinalsSpin Hansen is announced first and he makes his way to the ring, slapping hands along the way. Spin steps between the ropes and stretches a little, but looks ready for action. Tytan is announced and he makes his way to the top of the ramp, pausing to look at Spin, and out at the fans who are booing him loudly. Tytan has that chain draped over his shoulders and holds it, rubbing it lovingly between his fingers. Tytan slowly heads to the ring and steps between the ropes. Spin immediately points the chain out to the referee, and the ref demands that Tytan leaves it outside the ring. Tytan tosses it aside and laughs as the referee calls for the bell. As soon as the bell rings, Spin charges across the ring and stuns Tytan with a straight right to the jaw. Spin connects with several chops, backing Tytan into the corner, then whips him across the ring to the opposite corner, and charges after him with a clothesline. Spin grabs Tytan for a bulldog, but Tytan shoves him to the ropes and tries a clothesline of his own on the rebound, but Spin ducks and rebounds off the ropes and tries a cross body block, but Tytan shows his remarkable power and catches Spin! Tytan hits a fall away slam, sending Spin across the ring, then gets to his feet, waits for Spin to get to a knee, and charges and catches Spin with a boot right to the face. Spin falls out of the ring to the floor and Tytan comes right out after him. Tytan grabs Spin’s head and slams it off the announce table, then grabs his chain and wraps it around his fist and takes aim. As Spin turns around, Tytan charges, but Spin was playing possum! He takes Tytan down with a drop toe hold, sending the chain back into Tytan’s face! Spin pulls Tytan up and rolls him into the ring and follows, covering him and getting a two count. When we see Tytan, we see that the chain has opened him up. Spin grabs Tytan’s head and hammers him with shots to the forehead, then pulls him to his feet and sends him to the ropes and catches him on the rebound with a thunderous powerslam, covers, and gets another two count. Tytan kicks out with authority and sits up, but Spin is up quickly and caches him with kicks to the small of the back, then drives his knee into Tytan’s back and pulls back on his chin, trying to keep the big man grounded. Tytan snarls with pain, but fights to his feet and is about to break the hold when Spin grabs Tytan and hits a Randy Orton back breaker sending Tytan right back to the mat. Spin flips Tytan over and tries to lock him in the Whiskey Tango Foxtrot, but Tytan blocks it. Eventually Spin gives up and hammers Tytan with forearms to the back of the head before pulling the big man to his feet and sending him to the ropes. Spin lowers his head a moment too soon and Tytan connects with a kick to the chops that stands Spin up, Tytan hits a spinning elbow that catches Spin right on the temple and sends him staggering to the ropes. Tytan charges and clotheslines Spin over the top rope to the floor. Tytan follows him to the outside and pulls Spin to his feet and catches him with a knee to the gut, then sends him face first into the ring post Spin falls to the floor, but Tytan isn’t done yet, he pulls Spin back up and puts his face on the post again and connects with a boot to the back of the head that slams Spins face into the post again. Spin falls back to the floor, blood pouring down his face, his eyes glassy, he could well have a concussion. Tytan rolls Spin into the ring and covers, but Spin manages to roll his shoulder at two. Tytan pulls Spin to his feet and hauls him up on his shoulders and hits a DEATH VALLEY DRIVER! Spin is dead. Tytan covers and hooks the leg, one, two, thre…..NO! Spin rolls his shoulder again. Tytan snaps at the referee and gets up and backs the referee into the corner threatening to murder him. The distraction allows Spin to get to his feet, Tytan turns and charges at Spin and Spin catches him with a SPINEBUSTER! Spin hooks the leg, one, two, thre…NO! now its Spin’s turn to look at the referee in disbelief. Spin pulls Tytan up and hooks him, and hits the HAIR OF THE DOG (Hellevator)! He covers again and gets another two count, Tytan gets his foot on the bottom rope just before the three. Spin pulls Tytan to his feet and shoves him into the corner and tries to set him up for a superplex, but Tytan rakes the eyes, then knees Spin in the midsection, and shoots him between the turnbuckles into the ring post! Spin’s head thuds off the steel and Tytan pulls a dazed Spin to the middle of the ring and hits the STEINER SCREWDRIVER! Tytan covers, one, two, three, this one is over.
WINNER in 17:31 – Tytan
After the match Tytan gets the mic and his chain, and he speaks
“Poe…..this is for you. This will be your fate at the pay per view”
Tytan loops the chain around Spin’s neck and throws him over the top rope to the floor, then pulls the chain, pulling Spin off his feet. Spin claws at the chain around his neck as he is lifted off the floor. The blood pours off his head and Spin goes limp. Before any permanent damage can be done, officials and Stank rush the ring. Tytan releases the hold and escapes through the crowd. He pauses about halfway up then turns back to look and sees Poe standing on the stage with his arms folded across his chest glaring at Tytan. Tytan smirks and disappears into the back.
COWBOY UP & BEER BARON vs. THE HEROES GUILD – OOWF Campeonas de Trios Title Match“The Bridge of Khazad Dum” plays, and Bryce Larson, flanked by Blitz and Nayr, steps out onto the stage. Larson gives a slight nod, and the three men sprint down the aisle and slide into the ring. Blitz and Nayr leap onto the turnbuckles and raise their arms, while Larson climbs onto the middle rope and does the same. The crowd eats this up, and the Heroes bask in the cheers for a few moments before Blitz and Nayr moonsault into the ring as the Champions walk out onto the stage. “Cowboy” Chad Madison, astride Chip and with The Beer Baron and “Insane” Zane Myers on either side, moseys to ringside. The champions climb into the ring and hold the titles high, and then hand them to referee Junior Hale. Zane insists on a handshake and the Heroes being, well, Heroes, It turns into a handshakefest, with Junior, the timekeeper, and even a few ringside fans getting involved. Finally, everyone has shaken everyone else's hand and the two teams turn to opposite sides of the ring, as Junior calls for the bell.
As soon as the bell rings, the Heroes sprint to the ropes and nail the champions with triple springboard moonsaults. Bryce rolls to his feet and dropkicks Baron, sending him through the ropes to the floor as Nayr and Blitz back Madison and Myers into opposite corners and attack with chops. They hit tandem Irish whips, but Cowboy Up put on the brakes before they collide – which sets them up perfectly for a double flying clothesline from Bryce. Cowboy Up roll out of the ring and Bryce gets up and turns around into a spear from Baron.
Baron spears Bryce into the corner, and drives his shoulder into Bryce's midsection, knocking the wind out of him. He pulls Bryce out of the corner and hoists him for the Last Call For Alcohol, but Bryce grabs the top rope to block. As Baron tries to pull him free, Nayr comes flying in and levels him with a leg lariat and slides back out of the ring before Junior can react. Bryce lands on his feet, and sprints to the ropes. He nails Baron with a shoulder block as he gets up, and Baron staggers but does not go down. Bryce goes to the ropes and tries it again, and Baron teeters, but manages to stay on his feet. Bryce tries a third time, but Baron sidesteps and catches him, driving him to the mat with a spinning side slam. Baron scrapes Bryce off the mat and tosses him to the champion's corner, making the tag to Myers.
Zane comes in and rocks Larson with an uppercut, then hits a series of chops. He starts an Irish whip, puts on the brakes, and sends Bryce hard back into the corner. He tags Chad Madison and nails Larson with an over-the-knee backbreaker and holds him in place. Madison goes to the top rope and hits a leg drop on Bryce, causing him to flip and hit the mat face-first. Madison covers, and gets two before Blitz dives in to break it up. Blitz tries to slide back out, but Zane is in and drags him to his feet, then hits a sick two-handed choke slam from behind. Blitz rolls under the ropes and drops to the floor.
Madison drags Bryce to his feet and backs him to the ropes. He sends him across the ring and hits a back body drop, then goes to the ropes and nails Bryce in the face with a dropkick as he sits up. Madison snaps Larson over with a suplex, then goes to the ropes and hits a rolling thunder. He hooks the leg, but Nayr dives in to break it up. Myers comes in again and grabs Nayr, who nails him in the stomach with a kick and hops onto his shoulders. Nayr spins around and takes Myers down with a hurricanrana, draping him across the second rope. Nayr hits the ropes and nails Myers with a 619 (which I'm sure he has another name for)! Myers staggers back, and Nayr slides to the apron and springboards off the top rope. He hits Myers, who catches him in position for a power bomb. Before Myers can hit the move, Nayr starts throwing punches, knocking him off balance and driving him to the mat. Nayr rolls to his feet as the crowd roars their approval – that is until Baron takes his head off with Das Boot. Nayr collapses like a wet noodle, and Baron pitches him out of the ring.
Baron joins Madison and they send Bryce to the ropes, and attempt a double clothesline but Bryce ducks. As he hits the ropes, Blitz, having crawled back to the apron, slaps him on the back and tags himself in. Larson hits Baron with a flying forearm, sending him stumbling against the ropes and toppling them both over the ropes to the outside. Blitz springs off the top rope and hits Madison with a dropkick, but lands badly and seems to tweak his knee. Blitz staggers, but shakes it off as Madison gets up. He drops Madison to his knees with a swift kick, then backs up and hits the Shiner! He goes for the cover, but Myers drags him off and hurls him into the corner. Myers delivers a series of body blows, then gorilla presses and slams him. Myers sends Blitz to the ropes and plants him with a spine buster. He covers, but Blitz rolls a shoulder just in time. Myers scrapes Blitz up and tries a suplex, but Blitz lands on his feet, staggering and grimacing when he lands. Blitz turns and delivers a kick, but Myers catches it, driving him to the mat and twisting the knee. Blitz screams in pain and Junior, realizing Myers is not the legal man, forces him to break the hold. Myers leaves the ring and Madison grabs Blitz's leg, locking on a spinning toehold. Again, Blitz screams in pain, but he refuses to give up. Nayr darts into the ring and Junior cuts him off, but the distraction is enough for Blitz to kick free. He gets to his feet and Madison sends him hard to the corner, but Blitz leaps to the top rope and with a blood curdling scream, springs off with a moonsault that levels Madison. Blitz rolls him up and hooks both legs as Nayr and Larson sprint across the ring and tackle Myers and Baron before they can break it up. Junior counts One...Two...Three.
WINNERS, and new Campeonas de Trios Champions, in 12:45, The Heroes Guild.
After the match: Nayr and Bryce retrieve the belts and return to the ring. They help Blitz to his feet, but he cries out and collapses as soon as he attempts to put weight on his injured leg. They help him slide out of the ring and all but carry him to the back as the crowd looks on in concern.
THIM REYNOLDS vs. THE AMNESIAC – OOWF Onslaught Championship MatchAlice in Chains starts to cascade through the arena as “I Can't Remember” starts to play. The Amnesiac makes his way down to the ring slowly, and through his mask we can see a far away look in his eyes. Clearly, this doesn't bode well for the IHOP member. He wanders aimlessly into a corner and stands there as Referee Junior Hale takes it all in. “Lay Your Hands on Me” starts up and OOWF Onslaught Champion Thim Reynolds makes his way down the ramp to a generally warm response and plenty of champion's pyro. He hands the Onslaught Championship to Hale and immediately goes over to Amnesiac and starts to talk trash. The Amnesiac doesn't respond at all. Awesome. Hale shrugs, hands the belt to the outside and calls for the bell...WE'RE UNDERWAY!
Reynolds immediately starts to assault Amnesiac with open-handed chops, and drives Amnesiac into the corner. Hale steps in and gets a clean break. Reynolds steps back, and Amnesiac walks across the ring to lock up. They stalemate there for a second until Amnesiac buries a knee into Reynolds gut. Amnesiac works a headlock and cinches it in before delivering a closed-fist punch to Reynolds in the headlock. This draws a warning from Hale. Amnesiac pleads innocence, but Reynolds is heated and hits Amnesiac with a Short Spear, and starts landing some closed-fist punches of his own. Hale breaks that up and warns Reynolds, so now they're even. Hale allows Amnesiac to stand up first before He signals the two back together. Both go in for a lockup, but Reynolds stops short and nails Amnesiac with a kick to the stomach. He hits the side ropes and gets Amnesiac with a Million Dollar Kneelift. Amnesiac wobbles and Reynolds hits the far ropes, bouncing back for a Swinging Neckbreaker. That takes Amnesiac down, and Reynolds covers for a 2-count.
Amnesiac kicks out, but Reynolds doesn't let up, quickly cinching in the Reflex-o-lock; and Amnesiac is in a bad way. He twists and contorts as Reynolds works different pressure points and Amnesiac reacts in pain. After a full 90 seconds, Amnesiac makes a desperate dive for the ropes and gets there, burning a rope break. 2 or 3 stuffed teddy bears appear in the ring, having been thrown from the crowd. I wonder what that's about. In good Onslaught Rules fashion, Hale allows Amnesiac to get to his feet before calling for the match to restart. Reynolds charges immediately, but for once Amnesiac outsmarts someone and pulls down the ropes for a LOW BRIDGE sending Reynolds flying to the outside, headfirst all the way into the barrier. Amnesiac starts to give chase, but Hale restrains him; because nothing fun can ever happen in an Onslaught match. Instead, Hale starts a count; and Reynolds manages to shake out the cobwebs and scramble into the ring at 8. Hale again holds off Amnesiac until Reynolds can get to his feet. He does and Hale calls the two back together, and it looks like Reynolds is expecting an attack. Amnesiac is holding his ground, and it's Reynolds who rushes in to attack. Amnesiac expertly closes the distance, and pops off a sweet Belly-to-Belly Suplex. Amnesiac rushes over and locks on an STF! Who knew? And it's a good-looking one too! Reynolds is in big time trouble, and somehow after some time passes; Reynolds makes a desperate dive for the ropes, burning his first rope break.
Suddenly,
Teddy Bears start raining from the sky and into the ring. Let's go to the announce table for an explanation!
Nash: Uh...what the fuck is with these Teddy Bears?
Russ: The great fans of Hollywood, PA are donating thousands of teddy bears to local inner-city children!
Razz: They were supposed to start throwing after the champ's first rope break, and God did they ever! This is off the CHAIN!
Nash: Umm, am I the only one who's going to ask WHAT local inner-city is within 200 miles of this place? The mean streets of Williamsport?
Russ: TEDDY BEARS!
Nash: Can I get out of my contract?Finally, the Teddy Bears are gathered and cleared out of the ring, and Hale is ready to resume things. Hale calls for the re-start, and Amnesiac and Reynolds lockup in the middle of the ring once more. Reynolds gets leverage this time, and Amnesiac loses ground. Amnesiac re-doubles his efforts in shoves forward; but Reynolds lets him go, and Amnesiac goes flying. Reynolds floats underneath and comes out the backside! He locks on the Reflex-o-lock once more and THIS time it's in the middle of the ring. Amnesiac taps almost immediately.
WINNER in 8:14 by SUBMISSION...Thim Reynolds!
THE CHICKENSHIT HEELS vs. KZ vs. RUN DEA – OOWF World Tag Team Title MatchIt’s time for war in the OOWF as the World Tag Team Championship is about to be decided between three teams who clearly do not like one another. Coming out first as Ministry’s “Scarecrow” hits is the team known as Joyful Slaughter. It is Moosehead Jack and LD Williams. They are kz and they look like they are ready for a fight as they quickly walk down to the ring ignoring the somewhat mixed reaction from the crowd. Moose takes a seat in one corner while LD runs the ropes to get ready. Both pay no attention as Rage Against the Machine’s “Killing in the Name” starts to play in the arena. Alexander Darling and Davin Moreland step out from the back and get a shockingly very loud positive reception from the Pennsylvania crowd. This is partly due to whom they are facing tonight and partly due to Alexander’s training in the local ROH school. And instead of walking down the aisle, Alexander and Davin head to opposite sides of the stage and back up a few steps. It looks like they are waiting to ambush the champs. Inside the ring, LD points this out to MHJ who shrugs for the moment, but does get to his feet. “Right Here, Right Now” by Van Halen starts and as soon as Johnny and Alan make their way out from backstage Davin and Alexander ambush them from the side respectively. Inside the ring, LD Williams and Moosehead Jack are standing on the ropes looking down the aisle and Junior Hale is yelling for them to get down to the ring.
Moreland ignores the yells as he picks Johnny up into a press slam and he holds him up as Alexander takes Alan up and over with a snap suplex at DM’s feet. And now Davin just drops Johnny on top of AA. It doesn’t look like Run DEA is finished yet either as Alexander backs up and gets a running start towards Davin who lowers his head and flips Darling over like a back-body drop, but with the added momentum AD does a another half of a rotation and lands a splash of his own. Alexander gets to his feet and he and Davin admire their handiwork for just a moment before Alexis Darling finally makes her appearance yelling at her team to turn around. They finally understand what she is saying, but it’s a second too late as MHJ and LDW have finally joined the action and are now trading shots with Alex and Davin. Moose and Davin have reconnected after their brawl this past week, which leaves Williams and Darling trading their own punches. Moose is able to block a few of Davin’s punches and then he grabs him by the trunks and flings him down the ramp. Right next to that act, Alexander is able to catch LD with a drop-toe-hold and then he kicks Williams down the rest of the ramp. AD gets to his feet and looks next to him and sees MHJ sneering at him. It’s been a long time, but there is no love lost between these two. It looks like they are about to start really punching each other, but before either can throw a punch; Johnny and Alan are back up and hit stereo Thesz presses on MHJ and AD. As TCH are about to start reigning strikes down, both have their heads damn near taken off by stereo SHINING WIZARDS from Davin and LD.
Davin goes after AA as LD does the same to Johnny and they begin to drag the Chickenshit Heels down to ring. Moose and Alex have picked themselves up and are avoiding each other as they head the ramp to join their respective partners. Moose and LD head in one direction as they play ping-pong with Johnny’s skull. Rights from MHJ and lefts from LDW and JA is clearly on dream street. Meanwhile, Davin has tossed Alan inside the ring and starts to climb up one turnbuckle while Alex climbs up the opposite side. AA is directly in between them and that’s trouble for him as Darling jumps at the same time as Davin. AD hits the FROG SPLASH, DM hits the SOMERSAULT LEGDROP and AA may be dead.
Back to the outside where LD whips Johnny hard into the guardrail and then he grabs MHJ and follows by sending him right after JA. Moose extends his arm he clotheslines Adrenaline over the guardrail and into the third row. Junior Hale looks ready to call this match, but it hasn’t even started yet so he just shakes his head. Moosehead Jack walks back to Williams to talk over their plan of attack and this puts them right in the line of sight of Run DEA. Davin slaps Alex on the back and they nod at each other; both hit the ropes and then start charging kz who don’t notice them til the last possible moment and by then it’s too late as Davin nails his NO HANDED PLANCHA over the top onto LD Williams and Alexander follows suit by hitting a TOPE CON HILO on Moose. Run DEA lands in the second row and quickly jump up on some chairs and the crowd is going nuts.
Davin and Alex hop off their chairs as Davin heads back towards the ring and Alan while Alexander walks around the outside and finds Johnny trying to get to his feet in the pile of chairs. AD tosses Johnny back over the barricade into the ringside area and then slides him into the ring. Technically the match could start right now, but it looks like Junior Hale is now on the outside checking on his Dungeons & Dragons quest on his iPhone. I guess we’ll keep up with the action before the actual match begins. Davin lifts Alan in a dead lift and takes him over with a RELEASE GERMAN SUPLEX on one side of the ring while Alexander picks Johnny up…SLINGSHOT BRAINBUSTAAAAA.
Run DEA is clicking on all cylinders tonight and it looks like they have the number of the champs. Davin yells something over to his partner and Alex nods as both guys roll The Chickenshit Heels over and they lock the legs…Stereo Run DEA MOTHERFUCKING CURBSTOMPS. That’s normally the precursor for the finish. Darling picks AA up and stands him on his wobbly legs in the center of the ring and calls Moreland over. They stand on opposite sides of Capps. Davin goes high, Alex goes low…
TOTAL ELIMINATION!!!
Alan rolls out of the ring as Johnny gets back to his feet and grabs Davin and tries to spin him around, but BY GAWD, it’s a DAVIN NO-SELL…that hasn’t been seen in a long time. Moreland slowly turns and he shakes his head no, no, no as he kicks JA in the stomach and lifts him up for a power bomb. Alexander gets into position under Davin and lifts the knees…POWERBOMB LUNGBLOWER on Johnny who bounces damn near across the ring, but Alexis is there to stop him from rolling all the way out. She pushes him back in the ring and we can hear her yell, “Finish it.” Her brother kips up to his feet and heads over to Johnny and lifts him up onto his shoulders…he places the hand across the throat just as Davin hits the ropes…
DARLING DRIVER DIAMOND CUTTER!!!
Johnny is dead and Davin makes the cover and Alexis finally gets Hale’s attention on the outside and is about to when Moose cuts her off and distracts her long enough for LD Williams to slide in the opposite side of the ring with one of the tag team belts. He’s able to come up from behind Alex and pastes him in the back of the skull with the belt. Davin finally notices what is going on and he goes to SPEAR Williams. But LDW is able to side step at the last second and DM doesn’t realize Moose is there with the other belt and he gets it right between the eyes.
And just before Junior Hale finally turns around and looks in the ring LDW is able to toss the belt he was holding into Johnny’s hand so all Hale sees is one belt in Moose’s hand, one in Johnny’s and both members of Run DEA down on the canvas. So he has no choice but to throw this one out and get back to his thrilling D&D quest. MHJ is so mad he drops the other belt onto Johnny’s stomach.
Meanwhile, Alan has finally gotten back up and he’s able to slowly drag the lifeless carcass of his partner out of the ring. He reaches over Johnny and grabs the two belts and places one around his partner’s waist before they start limping their way up the ramp with one eye kept on the ring. The Chickenshit Heels did not look good tonight, one guesses that’s what happens when you take the week off, but they were able to retain their championships as a result of the no contest. Inside the ring, kz is staring up the aisle at the retreating champs so they don’t notice that Run DEA is getting to their feet behind them and before anyone can stop him, Alexander Darling lunges at Moosehead Jack and takes him down from behind. These two are trading punches and it doesn’t take long for the blood to start pouring. They aren’t holding back at all with these punches. And just before it looks like LD and Davin are about to mix it up, they kind of realize that Moose and Alex aren’t working with one another. They are truly trying to punch each other out.
Davin grabs Alexander around the waist as LD does the same to Moose and both are just hurling expletives at one another. Alexander clearly has a broken nose and bruises are already starting to form on the cheeks and around the eye. Meanwhile Moosehead Jack’s left eye is already starting to close and he is spitting out copious amounts of blood. Davin is finally able to drag Alexander out of the ring and Alexis comes over and starts to help Davin drag Alex up the ramp while LD is doing everything in his power to hold Moose back from hopping out of the ring.
WINNERS - No Contest in 0:00.
Your unofficial result is The Chickenshit Heels have won the battle by remaining the OOWF World Tag Team Champions, but you can guarantee they don’t feel like big winners tonight. And the bigger news is that a war that has been dead for almost a year may have restarted tonight. The future of the OOWF tag team division is really clicking on all cylinders. Moose finally shakes himself free from Williams and leaves the ring, he is standing there staring at Darling as he is being pulled up the ramp. Finally Moose gets the sense that someone is staring at him, he turns to the crowd and sees the large man that has been spotted the last few weeks staring right at him from his seat. Moose slowly turns to him and looks at him straight on, the large man laughs, and Moose snarls and looks like he is going to go over the railing after him, but once again, Williams holds him back and they finally head to the back.
THE DEAD vs. CHRIS EVANS – OOWF Intercontinental Title MatchThe challenger, Chris Evans, makes his way to the ring first, to the song “The Trooper” by Iron Maiden. He gets a mixed reaction as he always has; he’s likeable enough personally, but hanging out with the Run DEA folks tends to draw one some ire. Like last week, he chills out on one of the turnbuckles as his music winds down.
Smashing Pumpkins’ “Doomsday Clock” hits, and OOWF Intercontinental Champion The Dead makes his way to the ring, title belt slung across his left shoulder. He gets some boos, again because of his association with DEA.
Russ: Bah Gawd, these men are going to have to have a good match to get the crowd excited.
Razz: It’ll have to be off the chain, that’s for sure.
Your referee is Angelo Barros (the only referee’s name I can remember at the moment). Both competitors shake hands and Barros calls for the bell.
Collar and elbow lock up and neither wrestler is able to get the advantage. Instead, they strain against each other for a bit, then break the hold. They then circle each other. Another lock-up, and this time Evans gets the go-behind, getting Dead in a hammerlock. The Dead elbows Chris Evans , who responds by shoving the Dead against the ropes. The Dead bounces back with a shoulder block. He runs the ropes, Evans does the whole hit the dirt thing, and the Dead hops over him, running the ropes again. This time, Evans takes him down with an arm drag and holds onto the armwringer. Despite the pain, Dead is able to get to his feet and reverse it. Elbows to Evans back, and Evans is down. A pin attempt gets a one count. Both men get to their feet, and the crowd’s interest is piqued by that cool opening sequence.
Evans comes up with a chop to Dead’s chest. The Dead snarls and chops him back. The men go blow for blow for a bit. Just when the crowd is about to lose interest, the Dead starts going nuts, whaling on Evans with closed fists, rights and lefts and more rights and lefts. Evans puts up a bit of a fight, but he’s not a brawler. He is backed into a corner, at which point Barros breaks it up. Evans uses this as a distraction, charging out of the corner and spinning onto Dead’s shoulders with a headscissors spin into an arm drag. The Dead slides across the ring to the opposite corner. He rolls out of the ring to regroup.
Evans runs the ropes and charges at The Dead’s side of the ring, looking for a baseball slide. Dead ducks and Evans slides right over. Huge clothesline from The Dead! He picks up Evans and hurls him against the guardrail. He spears Evans against said guardrail a couple of times, then rolls him into the ring. He makes the pin but only gets a two count for his effort.
The Dead hauls up Evans and whips him into the ropes, and goes for a clothesline which Evans ducks. And Evans sees his moment and grabs Dead in a guillotine choke- it’s the Helios Reverse. But The Dead has the sense to fight out of it, boxing Evans ears until Evans releases the hold from the pain. Irish whip by The Dead, but it’s reversed, and Evans nails the Zeus’ Fury, a Blue Thunder Powerbomb on Dead on the rebound. Now Evans goes for the pin, but The Dead manages to kick out at two.
Now it’s Evans’ turn to haul up the Dead. He hurls Dead into the corner, then charges in with a running back elbow. Now Evans grabs a headlock, and Dead is bulldogged to the mat. Before he can react, Evans expertly applies a Muta Lock. The Dead grimaces in pain. After a few moments, Dead grabs Evans’ arms and wrenches them apart, then powers Evans off of him. Evans spins around only to be Lou Thesz pressed by The Dead, who delivers some vicious punches and Bionic elbows. After some prompting by Barros, he breaks the hold.
As both men get up, The Dead runs for the nearest set of ropes, bounces off the second rope, and plants Evans with his signature springboard DDT. A pin attempt gets two. Despite themselves, many fans were holding their breath at that one. The Dead whips Evans to the ropes. Big boot attempt is ducked by Evans, who runs the ropes and takes Dead down with the Clothesline from Hades. Evans feels pretty pumped from that move, and hauls up The Dead for some suplex action. Today he’s in the mood for a Japanese Ocean Suplex. The Dead is hauled up to his shoulders, but that’s where things go wrong for Evans. The Dead uses this as an opportunity to land some stiff looking punches. Evans drops Dead in front of him, which is a bad idea, as Dead reacts with a Close the Casket! Evans drops quickly.
Dead looks around and notices he has the crowd’s attention. Could it be? Yes, The Dead is moonwalking. I repeat, it’s the Night of the Moonwalking Dead.
Russ: I can’t believe it. I just can’t believe it.
After that little celebration, The Dead puts his mind on business, and climbs to the top rope. He delivers a cool looking moonsault, but of course Evans rolls out of the way. Both men stay down, and Barros begins a ten count, but both men are up at around four or so. They dazedly stagger towards each other, and The Dead goes for a big haymaker punch, but Evans grabs his arm, hoists Dead over his body and in an impressive counter, transitions into the Lethal Vortex (a fireman’s carry into a tilt-a-whirl sidewalk slam.) Evans with the pin, one, two, two and a half.
The two men wrestle back and forth for about ten minutes, resulting in tons of near falls that have the fans in attendance on their feet. This ends with The Dead trapped in Evans’ punishing submission finisher, the Ode to Canada. Evans locks it in for a bit, but after a while it becomes clear that The Dead isn’t ready to tap out. He releases the move, but only to set up his devastating Icarus Wings maneuver. He connects with it, and it looks like this one may be over for the Intercontinental Champ. But just as Barros’ hand is about to slap the mat for the third time, the bell rings. It’s a time limit draw.
WINNER – 30 Minute Time Limit Draw
POE vs. FIREWOMAN – OOWF World Heavyweight Title MatchThe crowd is buzzing for tonight's main event and it's a big one. “Flame On” comes over the PA, and Firewoman appears at the top of the ramp dressed in all black; clearly she means business tonight. She comes out to a mixed response. Fire turns to Senior Referee Davis Hightower briefly and then leans on the ropes, focused completely on the ramp. “Mausam & Escape” fires up, and Poe, accompanied by Selena Gomez (wearing a T-Shirt that says “Shawn Johnson Smells like Skank”) appear at the top of the ramp to a monstrous ovation. They wait for the pyro to conclude before slowly making their way down the ramp. Poe climbs in, tossing his duster to the outside; and shoots Firewoman a very smug look. Fire doesn't respond to that at all, and Davis Hightower calls for the bell...WE'RE UNDERWAY!
Poe stands with his hands on his hips as Fire circles him slowly in a fighting position. Poe looks...amused. Firewoman unleashes a lightning-fast kick to Poe's hamstring, and suddenly he's not so amused. Firewoman repeats this twice more, and Poe almost falls over. Fire goes to the well once to often though, and Poe grabs her leg. Nice spot as Fire tries for the Enziguri counter, but the big man is able to duck it. Poe drops the leg to go on offense, but Fire counters THAT with a Pele Kick which sends Poe stumbling backward into the ropes. Fire recovers and does a front handspring locking her legs around Poe's head, and snapping off a Hurricarana. Springboard Firesault from Fire and she makes a cover, which barely registers a 2 count. Poe's dazed but is trying to get to his feet, and gets to one knee. Fire drops back a few steps and then charges forward full speed, landing a SHINING WIZARD right on the money. Poe might be out! Fire takes a look at Poe and signals the crowd, it's time for the BFE! She takes off and EATS CANVAS as Poe is able to roll out to the floor. Fire gathers herself in the ring as Poe tries to shake the cobwebs out. Selena is there to help, but looks up and suddenly runs away. Why? TOPE CON HILO from Fire and she lands on her feet; drilling Poe in the temple with kicks. Poe tries to get away, and Fire uses this momentum to get him back into the ring. Poe rolls in, and Fire follows with a Slingshot Double-Knee Drop right on Poe's neck. Fire quickly gets Poe into position, and is able to lock on a Surfboard Hold...and she follows that up with a MOTHERFUCKING CURBSTOMP! Poe howls in pain and Fire positions herself once again at the turnbuckle. BFE CONNECTS! 1...2...New Ch...Poe's foot mysteriously ended up on the bottom rope, and good ref that he is, caught it before it was too late. Out on the floor, Selena sheepishly walks away from where Poe's foot was.
Fire is heated and starts to shout epithets at Selena from the ring; but catches herself and turns back to Poe. Too late, it appears, as Poe kicks her in the stomach from his back. Fire doubles over and backs up as Poe tries to roll to his knees. Fire runs at Poe, and Poe springs up and DESTROYS Fire with a Spinebuster. Poe's still in rough shape from Fire's onslaught, and rests on the ropes for a minute, unable to follow up. After a few seconds he does finally go over, but as he's bending down to pull up Fire, Fire DIVES at Poe's ankle (yes, that ankle) and rolls through with an Ankle Lock applied, and it is grapevined and that's going to be a HUGE issue for Poe. One minute passes, two minutes pass, and Poe comes very close to tapping a couple of times, but manages to show the heart of a champion and dive for the ropes. Hightower calls for a break and Fire can't believe this match is continuing. Poe can't even pull himself up yet when Fire charges and tries for a Basement Dropkick, but Poe is able to get out of the way; but grabs Fire's hair on the way by. Ow. He then smashes the back of her head on the corner of the apron a few times before letting her collapse to the floor below. Double ow. Poe crawls to the opposite side of the ring and tries to recover.
Firewoman is back in the ring at the count of 5, and runs right at Poe. Poe explodes out of the corner and SPEARS Fire, taking the wind out of her. Fire seems none the worse for wear, but neither does Poe as he hooks Firewoman in and hits an OBELISK which scrambles Fire's brains a bit. Poe pulls her up and whips her into the ropes. HIEROGLYPH conencts and Fire's just about done. Poe's moving very deliberately, and limping due to the punishment he took earlier in the match. He signals to the crowd and locks Fire in. He goes for the CRUCIFIXION, but Fire is able to reverse into a Diamond Cutter try, which Poe is just able to shove off from. He spins Fire, kicks her in the gut, and it's CRUCIFIXION time!
WINNER in 14:57 by Pinfall...Poe!
Both combatants are down on the mat at this point, exhausted, and it looks like Fire's ankle lock did more damage than we originally thought. Out of nowhere, here comes Tytan flying down the ramp with a STEEL CHAIR! Chair shot for Poe! Chair Shot for Fire! Lather, Rinse Repeat! Will anyone stop this carnage??? Spin Freakin' Hansen will! He comes down with a baseball bat and damn near caves in Tytan's head with it, as he falls in a heap. The crowd cheers, Hansen spots the the wrestlers laid out and the World Title draped on Poe and makes the “Me Wanty Belt” sign.
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