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Post by mooseheadjack on Jun 8, 2008 9:32:44 GMT -5
* AA stands in front of the OOWF banner, mike in hand, looking a bit worse for wear and holding a box of Kleenex. Behind him stands Beast, looking menacing. *
You people don't have a clue what I do for you. You don't have a clue what I do for the OOWF. If it wasn't for Attitude Adjuster, the OOWF wouldn’t be able to afford this “Summer of Canadian Violence Tour” or whatever the hell The Rick decided to call this douchebaggery trip through this desolated wilderness. Because we’re in Canada, I caught a cold. And not just any cold, but a Saskatchewan Tsitsi Fly Cold. It’s a national epidemic! I could die right here in Summerside, Prince Edward Island. Isn’t that right Beast? (Beast nods his head and looks menacing.) And what kind of hell would that be to die in Canada? I might as well be in France or something. The damn doctor told me I had a 103 degree fever, which I’m sure is probably at least 110 degrees in American. (AA cough a couple times, blows his nose into a Kleenex and hands the Kleenex to Beast. Beast looks at the Kleenex, then tosses it over his shoulder.)
But I just want my fans to know that despite this cold, I will wrestle at Midweek Mayhem. After all, I’m only facing Soul Dragon. (AA smirks and laughs with Beast.) It’s not like I have to face Beast, or Niles Anderson, or Underdawg…Oh wait, I beat Underdawg last week, didn’t I. That’s right, pinned Underdawg with the Attitude Adjustment right in the middle of the ring. One, two, three. Soul Dragon, have you ever beat Underdawg? I didn’t think so.
But Soul Dragon, this isn’t about you. No, this is about your former tag buddy, Black. Blackdragon, you had the audacity to interfere in our match last week. Just as Niles and I had Canadian Dragon beat down in his home country…AGAIN!...you sneak your way into the ring and try to steal Niles’ OOWF Title belt. What is with all this belt stealing in the OOWF, Beast? (Beast shrugs.) Blackdragon, you have enough problems with your autograph signings and your baby kissing…don’t get involved with us, because it’s just a matter of time before I get involved with you! Niles, myself, Beast…we are the dominant force in the OOWF, and we’re proving it right now. Two weeks ago, Beast nearly killed Chris Alt, and Niles and I crushed Canadian Dragon and Hardbody Harris. Last week Niles, Beast and I would have won that eight-man match if it wasn’t for you.
So this week, you just worry about your little match with LD Williams. But while you’re hanging around, watch what Niles does to Underdawg. Watch what Beast does to Harris. And especially watch what I do to your little buddy Souldragon. Because even with this 103 degree Saskatchewan Tsitsi Fly Cold, I am…on my worst day…better than Souldragon…on his best day.
Let’s go, Beast. I need to go find some American medicine. This Canadian stuff may be cheap, but it sucks.
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Post by mooseheadjack on Jun 8, 2008 9:33:10 GMT -5
Thim is sat on a massage table in a locker room holding his head in his hands
TR: what do I have to do? Have I lost it? I'm good. I'm bloody good and yet this Scottish chump Firechild keeps on beating me . . . and now Capellan as well. Shall I forgo the Onslaught Title chase . . . am I not cut out for pure wrestling after all? Shall I just throw myself back into table, ladders and chairs (oh my!) and violence for the sake of violence? What do I do? Can you help me? Is that really the path that has been chosen for me?
The camera pans back to see Seraph stood opposite Thim
S: you are the only person that will know that Thim, what does your heart tell you?
Thim sits silent and motionless for over a minute. Slowly his eyes close and he begins talking in a very quiet monotone voice
TR: As I patrol in the valley of the shadow of the tricolour I must fear evil, for I am but mortal and mortals can only die. Asking questions, pleading answers from the nameless faceless watchers that parade the carpeted corridors of whitehall. Who orders desecration, mutilation, verbal masturbation in the guarded bureaucratic wombs. Care for your children, order them not into damnation to eliminate those who would trespass against you. For whose is the kingdom, the power, the glory for ever and ever and ever and ever . . .
Seraph smiles,
S: a good beginning
Thim shakes his head as if waking himself up . .
TR: where did that come from?? . . . Seraph, where are you
Thim is sat alone in the locker room . . .
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Post by mooseheadjack on Jun 8, 2008 9:33:34 GMT -5
(CTG and MHJ are walking back to the locker rooms from Rick's office)
CTG: (in character) despite our dubious arrangement I think we can continue to make a greater impact on the tag team division.
MHJ: sometimes I think you're enjoying this a little too much, 'crete.
CTG: Rest assured when this is over, I'll be back do chasing my true goal of OOWF singles gold!
MHJ: Speaking of singles, where's Holly?
CTG: She and I had a great discussion about our personal hobbies.
MHJ: nothing else happened?
CTG: (doesn't say anything when he opens the door to the locker room to find it looking like a fight broke out)
MHJ: o.O what happened in here?
CTG: alongside her love for cartoons of Japanese persuasion, it turns out she was an expert in alien love rituals.
MHJ: O.o
CTG: (rattles something off in Klingon)
MHJ: o.O
CTG: (grins evilly) we have a date after the Pay-Per-view (whooshes away)
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Post by mooseheadjack on Jun 8, 2008 9:33:56 GMT -5
*Niles, Attitude Adjuster and Beast are walking down the hall when Niles stops for a moment.*
AA - What's up, Niles?
Niles - You 2 just go ahead. I'll catch up. I have something I have to sort out.
*AA and Beast look at each other, shrug and then move on. Niles waits til they're out of site then turns to a door with the name 'Moosehead Jack' written on it. He walks in to find Moosehead there.*
Niles - as expected.
MHJ - What the hell do you want?
Niles - To make amends.
MHJ - Excuse me? Should I be waiting for a punchline?
Niles - not at all. It just dawned on me that right now, the Establishment is essentially dead. We're all off doing our own things. I hardly see you anymore, and really, you're the one who brought me in. For that, I want to thank you.
*MHJ is speechless. It's obvious he's still waiting for the punchline.*
Niles - it's not coming, Moose. Basically, I'm here to relive old times. I want you in my corner this week against the Underdawg.
MHJ - I got enough on my plate.
Niles - I know, but seriously, think about this. You and I are too dangerous together to stop being allies. And isn't it odd that the instant someone in the Establishment wins gold, the group essentially disbands? Think about that for a moment. You back me, it shows the world that the Establishment isn't dead. We show them that we were more than a team, we were an ideal. We were what a wrestling group was meant to be.
MHJ - I'll think about it.
Niles - You'll get back to me?
MHJ - Trust me.
*Niles hesitates for a moment and then walks out of the lockerroom. MHJ is still perplexed by this whole encounter.*
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Post by mooseheadjack on Jun 8, 2008 9:34:16 GMT -5
*Chris Alt is standing by with Sexy Female Journalist #6*
SFJ6: Chris Alt, after everything you've been through for the past few weeks, there must be a lot on your mind. In addition to all of that, tonight you have a match against Semaj B. We're all dying to hear some of your thoughts.
CA: You wanna hear my thoughts? You want to know what's on my mind? Where do I even start? Do I start with Donovan Viper and the Devil's Brigade, and the unfinished business I have with those wankers? Do I talk about how Viper screwed me out of the title twice? Do I talk instead about Beast? Do I talk about how try as I might to beat him- and I CAN beat him- he just seems to have my number? Do I talk about how everytime I step into the ring with him he pounds me into next week and I feel like the world's biggest masochist because I just keep wanting to get another shot against him? Do I dare to challenge the Beast to a street fight at the next pay per view? Or do I talk about Niles Anderson? My alledged "new business associate". "We don't have to like each other, but we'll watch each others' backs. Then when the time is right, you will have your title shot", Niles told me. For some unknown reason, I believed that smoldering pile of human waste. Then I find out that Niles is the one that sicced the Beast on me to begin with. Oh, and don't forget how pissed off I am at myself; I got so wrapped up in my other affairs that I let that slippery little weasel Carl Coolname escape my wrath without so much as even a tag match against Revolution XX. So yeah, right now there's a lot going on in my head. But Semaj B., don't let that make you think for even a second that I'm not totally focused on our match tonight. I'm cool with you, Semaj. I don't want to hurt you. I'm not even going to try to hurt you. But lately, I've been under a lot of strain, and I don't know if I can control my aggression. Watch out, Semaj- tonight won't be pretty for either of us.
SFJ6: Strong words, Chris. Did you just challenge Beast to a street fight at the pay per view?
*CA grins at her and walks off*
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Post by mooseheadjack on Jun 8, 2008 9:34:38 GMT -5
*The Beast is in the locker room, eating beef jerky. All of a sudden he hears a sound coming from a corner locker. BANG!...................BANG!..............BANG! The metal door budges, but doesn’t open.*
*Beast walks over and stands in front of it longer. The BANG BANG continues, and some muffled swearing can be heard. Beast chuckles. The BANGING gets louder, and the door is beginning to bend. A loud “DAMMIT!” can be heard, and then some heavy breathing. Beast laughs again and walks out the door.*
*The BANG resumes, and finally the door opens and HARDBODY POPS OUT! He looks around the room and finds it empty. Cursing again, he sees the door closing.*
HH: I’ll get you, BEAST!
*Hardbody runs at the wall, trying to cut Beast off at the pass. All he does, though, is knock himself silly, bouncing off the wall and falling back onto the floor.*
HH: How does he do that?
*Hardbody passes out.*
*Fievel is standing over Hardbody Harris, waving a towel in front of his face as he regains consciousness. Sitting up groggily, Harris rubs his head and shakes it out. Sexy Female Journalist ð comes in and sits next to Hardbody for an interview.*
SFJ ð : Hardbody, you’ve had a rough go around with Beast. You haven’t been able to get your hands on him, despite all your trickery and chicanery. Thoughts?
HH: Beast, I’ve had enough games. You won’t pop out when I want. You only show up when I’m watching porn or, erm, consoling a woman. You’ve hurt me in the ring, and it’s my turn to hurt you.
At Midweek Mayhem, I will prove that I am the SUPERIOR WRESTLER and showcase all of my SUPERIOR WRESTLING MOVES. You won’t be able to pop out of anything, except for maybe a casket.
SFJ ð: Chris Alt has challenged Beast to a Street Fight at the PPV. Your reaction?
HH: I don’t know what the PPV is going to be like. I hate Beast. I hate Viper. I hate Ax-Man. I hate Attitude Adjuster. I hate Niles Anderson. Although I’ve never talked to him, I hate Eric O’Mac. The Rick books the PPV matches, and all I know is that, win or lose Wednesday, my score will not be settled with Beast. This I promise.
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Post by mooseheadjack on Jun 8, 2008 9:35:18 GMT -5
*Dragon is sitting in a dark room with a monitor showing highlights of last week's show playing.*
CD: "So Niles...how did I feel to quit? To give up and accept defeat? I'm guessing it burns to know that in your "home town" you ended up quitting to me. And I'm hoping you want revenge. Becuase Niles, you have something I want. And I want it at the next PPV! That's right I'm..."
*Suddenly there is a crashing sound as The Beast breaks throught the wall. He looks at Dragon and charges. Dragon manages to sidestep the raging animal sending him face first into the Canadian flag knocking him out!*
Camerman: "Holy Crap! What the hell is that flag made out of?"
CD: "Hey...your breaking the illusion here camerman! And it's not the flag that knocked him out...what's bhind the flag, well that's another story."
*Dragon takes the flag down to reveal it was hiding his safe.*
CD: "Silly Beast...NOTHING can crack my safe!"
Camerman: "So what's in the safe anyways?"
CD: "Actually...I'm not sure. Let's open it..."
*CD opens the safe, AND THE BEAST POPS OUT!!! Dragon is knocked out as The Beast runs right over him.*
C: "How the hell is that possible?"
*The Beast just shrugs before crashing through the wall to make his exit.*
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Post by mooseheadjack on Jun 8, 2008 9:35:40 GMT -5
*Niles is stopped by Sexy Female Journalist #74 as he's walking out of Moosehead Jack's office.*
SFJ74 - Niles, after that talk with Moosehead Jack, are you...
Niles - You know, I'm not even going to let you finish that thought.
*Niles grabs SFJ74 by the arm holding the mic and delivers a devestating STEED-D-T!!! He grabs the mic from the limp Journalist and turns to the camera.*
Niles - You know, I'm gonna break the third wall here. I've been hearing everything that's been said about me. Yeah, sure, I've been in with Moosehead this whole time, so technically, I shouldn't be in the know, but I read the fucking script and now I'm here to answer all callers.
First off, Dragon. You're on. You beat me in a tag match. That's fantastic. But what you fail to understand is my winning record has not been as a result of tag team victories. It's been as a result of SINGLES victories. Of which you were one of my first. I've beaten you Dragon. Just cuz you caught me off guard in an 8 man clusterfuck, doesn't mean you can catch me off guard when it's just me and you. And so help me god...
*Niles raises the belt in the air.*
Niles - I'm keeping this, bitch.
Now onto Chris Alt. A guy who can't seem to get his facts straight. You got beef with one of my guys, that's fine. But don't think it's me calling those shots. And to prove my point, I'm gonna do something no other champ has done in this fed. And that's put my belt on the line TWICE! Chris, you can get your shot at the next PPV, just to show you how far my respect actually goes. But, because you've decided to be all dickish about what friends I choose, there's a catch. You challenged Beast to a streetfight. Well, you want a shot at me at the next PPV, you have to beat Beast. Mind you, we have to run this through The Rick and all, but I'm sure he'll see that The Specimen = ratings. And just to add extra spice to the deal, if you beat Beast, you get to pick the stipulation of our match.
So yeah, I might not be the most liked man in the OOWF. But I will show everyone that not only am I too be respected, I'm a force to be reckoned with. I fought to get this belt. I'll fight to keep it and I'll keep all you little bitches at bay. Donnie Viper, Underdawg, Chris Alt, Canadian Dragon and whoever else wants to come after me, give me all you got. I'll take it.
*Niles drops the mic, steps over the Journalist and takes off, belt in hand. Fade to Black.*
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Post by mooseheadjack on Jun 8, 2008 9:36:03 GMT -5
<As Niles storms away, he turns to take one last look at the fallen SFJ, when he turns back around to storm off, Moosehead Jack is standing in front of him>
NA: DAMN! How the hell? You were just....I didn't see you....
MHJ: Just stop. Look, I was thinking about what you said, the Establishment is not about me, or you, it's about a group of guys who came together to destroy the AYUFF. Well, from what I can see the AYUFF is dead.
NA: So what are you saying?
MHJ: What I am saying, is that for now, the Establishment is dead, at least as a group, it will always be there as an idea.
NA: What the hell are you talking about?
MHJ: Niles, you want to mend fences, you want to make things right between us again, I am all for that. You were a man and came to me, I respect that. You want me in your corner against UnderDawg, I'll be there. <Jack extends his hand>
NA <shakes Moose's hand, Jack pulls Niles close>
MHJ: Just a word of caution though, don't let my recent actions with Concrete fool you. We are good now, you screw me over, you do me wrong, and you will have hell to pay.
NA: Hey I'm the champ, I got all kinds of people gunning for me, I don't need you too, unless you are challenging me.
MHJ: <glanceing at Niles title, pausing in thought for a moment> No. Not now. I told you I had your back. I keep my word.
Trust me.
<Jack walks away leaving Niles staring in deep thought>
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Post by mooseheadjack on Jun 8, 2008 9:36:26 GMT -5
the beast is walking down the hallway of the arena. a random guy in plain clothes but with a backstage pass thingy and headphones to show that he's obviously OOWF crew runs up to him.
RGiPCbwaBPTaHtSTHOOC: excuse me! mr. beast!
beast: yes?
RGiPCbwaBPTaHtSTHOOC: i was instructed to show you to you locker room, sir.
B: good. i was wondering where that was.
*they walk down the hall a little ways*
RGiPCbwaBPTaHtSTHOOC: here you go sir.
B: this? this isn't a lockerroom. these walls are made out of paper.
RGiPCbwaBPTaHtSTHOOC: i didn't pick it, sir. i'm just supposed to show you where it is.
B: man. going through these walls isn't even worth it. but alright. why aren't i will niles and AA?
RGiPCbwaBPTaHtSTHOOC: like i said, i'm just supposed to show you where it is.
B: well alright.
*beast enters the paper locker room, using the door. he starts to get settled when suddenly hardbody harris comes crashing (ripping?) through the wall!
HH: ha, beast! you're not the only one who can crash through walls around here! and now i'm gonna give you a preview of what SUPERIOR WRESTLING is!
*harris runs and tackles the beast. they go falling through the paper wall, toppling over chris alt.*
CA: --the hell?!?
B: ALT!
CA: BEAST!
HH: ALT!
CA: HARRIS!
B: HARRIS!
HH: BEAST!
Dave: AAAAALLVIN!!!!
*the three wrestlers stop and just stare in silence. finally the beast gets up*
B: alright. here's the deal. to be honest, alt, i'm getting a little sick and tired of kicking your ass. it's not even fun anymore. but i'll tell you what. i'll accept your challenge under one condition... if hardbody harris joins in to make it a three-way dance!! cuz nothing will prove more that i am the SUPERIOR WRESTLER than kicking both your asses at once!!!
*alt and harris just stare at each other as the camera fades.*
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Post by mooseheadjack on Jun 8, 2008 9:36:51 GMT -5
FF Capslock and Stank are WALKING~! when SFJ#5 approaches them, mic in hand
Stank - Excuse me.
Stank ducks into the mens room.
SFJ#5 - Don't try to hide from me, Lucas!
FFC - Give it a rest Number 5. He doesn't want to talk to you.
SFJ#5 - Fine. Any thoughts on 3 Piece Set's reaction to your TLC challenge?
FFC - I don't know sweetheart. What's their reaction?
SFJ#5 - They think you guys are too fat to be effective, particularly with the ladders.
FFC - Too fat? TOO FAT? I guess we were too FAT to beat them for the tag belts the first time. Listen. If they think we are too fat then that just plays to our advantage. So let em go ahead and think what they want. We got a surprise waiting for them. Besides, Stank has been losing weight in anticipation of our eventual win. He want's to wear the belt around his waist for some reason. He's lost 3 inches so far.
Stank - 4!
SFJ#5 - I hear you in there Lucas!
FFC - Babe, just go.
SFJ#5 - You and I are gonna talk Lucas. YOU HEAR ME!
Stank - Your Momma!
FFC - Oh geez not this again.
SFJ#5 - Yours!
Stank - Your mom is like a gas station, pump first then pay!
FFC - Seriously Stank is this like your new GIMMICK or something? Come out the restroom!
SFJ#5 - YOUR mom is SO BIG she could sell SHADE!
Stank - YOUR MOM IS SO UGLY when she's at the BEACH the TIDE WON'T COME IN!
FFC -WILL YOU TWO JUST STOP IT!!??
SFJ#5 - This isn't over LUCAS!
Sexy Female Journalist Number 5 walks off. Stank peeks from behind the restroom door.
Stank - Is she gone?
FFC - Yeah. What's going on between you two?
Stank - Nothin is going on between us. I just haven't been calling her lately.
FFC - You know, why do men do that? I mean you slept with her. It's not like hot chicks are just busting down doors to jump into bed with you. I mean it's really insensiti...
Stank - STOP! Back up! What the hell is the matter with you?
FFC -What? I'm just saying.
Stank - Whatever Dr. Phil.
FFC - (Dismissive) EHHHH your momma.
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Post by mooseheadjack on Jun 8, 2008 9:37:13 GMT -5
*Hardbody Harris is gazing longingly (in a platonic sort of way) into Chris Alt's eyes long after the Beast has left*
HH: I don't really want to fight you.
CA: I don't really want to fight you, either.
HH: But I do want to fight Beast.
CA: So do I.
HH: I guess if I have to beat you up to get to Beast, I can live with myself.
CA: And if I have to beat you up to get to Beast and get my title shot at Niles Anderson, I'll be able to forgive myself.
HH: Alright then. No hard feelings?
CA: No hard feelings. Where's Fievel?
HH: I left him with that really weird looking pale guy that looks like Michael Jackson that says he's Sexy Female Journalist #33's cousin and came to see all the young OOWF fans.
CA: All the young... male... OOWF fans?
HH: ...yes.
CA: I think that is Michael Jackson.
HH: OH, JESUS! FIEVEL!!
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Post by mooseheadjack on Jun 8, 2008 9:37:34 GMT -5
Niles Anderson is WALKING~! in the back, the World Title strap placed securely over his shoulder, when he is attacked from behind by Uncle Entity. Entity is STOMPING away at Niles when Mark Vander comes in, KNOCKS Entity to the ground. He then proceeds to POUND away on Niles. This goes on for a bit when Semaj B runs in and pastes Vander with a clangy pole. He then proceeds to BEAT UP on Niles. Niles tries to fight back but is helpless before the OOnslaught. Semaj B. grabs a fire extinguisher to spray at Niles when THE BEAST POPS OUT!! and knocks down Semaj B! Beast then let's fly his fists on Niles! SFJ Numbers 73 through 85 then show up, overpower Beast, and proceed to gang up on Niles to WHUP on him some more! Niles DESPERATELY tries to flee the scene. He makes it about 30 feet when he is knocked down by a steel chair held by OMG! It's Scott Keith! Scott Keith goes through his fat man offense on Niles when Keith gets attacked from behind by CRZ! CRZ then grabs Niles before he can crawl away.
Niles - (whimpering) What the hell is going on?
CRZ ignores Niles question, rips open Niles' shirt, then CRZ is CHOPPING~! away at the exposed flesh. CRZ is about to be SUPLEXXING~! Niles to the concrete floor when Fievel jumps down from the rafters, lands on CRZ's face and bites the shit out of CRZ's nose. CRZ grabs his face in pain as Fievel then goes over to a nearly unconscious Niles and starts CLAWING at his eyes! Before any serious damage can be done Hardbody Harris scoops up Fievel and starts stomping on Niles. The preceding members of the OOWF locker room are seen walking toward a prone Niles, fighting each other to get to him, when a familiar guitar riff is heard playing through the halls.
Time to play the game! TIME TO PLAY THE GAAAAMME! Ha ha huh huh huh.
Triple H arrives! He spits water into Hardbody Harris's face. Hardbody stumbles off, blinded. Then HHH grabs Niles and sets him up for the pedigree.
HHH - YOU wanna FIGHT ME-ah!?!
PEDIGREE TO ANDERSON!
Finally the Rick shows up.
GMtR - ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT! THAT'S ENOUGH! Just WHAT THE HELL is GOING ON HERE??
A crowd of combatants comprised of various OOWF superstars, internet wrestling personalities, sexy female journalists, a rodent, and Fievel all approach Rick.
Acoccovoowfsiwpsfjaraf - RICK!RICKyougottagivemeashot! RICKIdeserveatitleshot.TitleTitle! ME! ME! ME!
GMtR - Hold it! Wait! Are you all implying that the clusterfuckery I see before me... All of this... is about getting... a title shot?
Uncle Entity - Did you see what I did to Niles? You have to give me a shot after the beating I just...
Beast - Hold on a sec! I am the one who beat down Niles not...
Semaj B - It seems to me! That if anyone beat up Niles and deserves the title shot it's...
Fievel - ME!
CRZ - No, ME!
Scott Keith - NO ME!
SFJ# 73 - 85 - NO US!
HHH - I AM THE GAME-UH and I'M THAT D...
GMtR - SHUT UP! All of you! This is the lamest bit of douchebaggery I've ever seen! Which is exactly what I need because you all are giving me the sandiest of vaginas! What do you think this is, the WWE? We don't just hand out title shots like candy on Halloween. You have to EARN your shots here and more importantly, your shot can't be devoid of all LOGIC! Speaking of the WWE what the holy fuck are YOU doing here PAUL?
HHH - I'm HERE-UH because I'M THAT D...
GMtR - DON'T make me get my red hot poker. Go home Paul. Scott, Chris? Wha? I'm the only Internet Wrestling Personality allowed here. If I ever need assistance I'll call the Broad before either of you. Thanks for coming and get out of my building. The rest of you... get back to your dressing rooms. SFJ's in my office immediately.
Everyone scatters the camera zooms in on Niles lying on the concrete floor next to some equipment cases marked ECW.
Niles - (groggily) ooohhh what just happened?
Stank - You just got knocked the FUCK out!
Niles - ehhh your momma.
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Post by mooseheadjack on Jun 8, 2008 9:38:00 GMT -5
Attitude Adjuster walks onto the scene, where Stank is baiting Niles into a "Your Momma" scenario.
AA: What the hell happened here? Niles, haven't I told you that's why I cut the old school promos in my basement with the OOWF banner hanging behind me? Don't go out in public unless you want to get punked out. Now come on...on your feet. Stank, we're not the best of friends or anything, but I think we can work together for a few minutes. Did you see which way Triple H went?
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Post by mooseheadjack on Jun 8, 2008 9:38:34 GMT -5
(OK, Niles and I aren't mind readers. Read his post below first, then this one. Otherwise you get a real bad time warp sensation.)
AA, Niles and Stank are standing in a hallway.
Niles: Are you sure this is going to work? It sounds pretty Sledgehammer of Plotish if you ask me.
Stank: Go with me on this one. How many times do you see Triple H aimlessly walking down a hallway when suddenly something unexpected happens? He’ll walk down this hallway any minute now.
And sure enough, down the hallway walks Triple H, saying something uselessly random to Ric Flair. Stank jumps out from the shadows in front of Triple H and Flair. AA and Niles stroll out in support of Stank.
HHH: What the hell is this?
Stank: Your Momma’s so ugly, the doctor slapped her before you were born.
HHH: Is that supposed to be funny? Ric, is he trying to be funny?
RF (suppressing laughter): Actually, that is kinda funny. I mean, I’ve met your momma, and she’s isn’t exactly a beauty queen. I mean, you got that nose from someone…
HHH: Shut up! These OOWF punks think they can mock me. I am the Game-ah. I am THAT DAMN GOOD!
Stank: You’re that damn ugly, too.
HHH: Is that so? You’re so ugly, your parents named you Stank!
AA: That really sucked.
Stank: No kidding. Plus, they actually named me Lucas. Which is a lot better than Jean-Paul.
HHH: That’s it! if you’re going to break kayfabe, I’m going to kayfabe your ass with a 20-minute speech! I am the Game-ah. I am that damn good. You fear the Pedigree because it is the Pedigree…
(20 minutes later, HHH is still windbaggering…)
Niles: Have we heard enough yet?
AA: Well, considering Ric left 10 minutes ago to get a sandwich, I’d say yeah.
Niles: That’s what I thought. Thanks, Stank. We can take it from here.
Niles steps toward Triple H. Triple H continues to windbagger, and grabs his sledgehammer in a threatening manner. Niles smiles at Trips and points to the top of the sledgehammer, where THE BEAST POPS OUT! Trips is surprised, Niles kicks Trips in the stomach, nails him with a STEED-DT! Niles, AA, Beast and Stank begin a massive beatdown of Triple H. Ric Flair comes back, sandwich in hand, and grabs AA by the shoulder. They stare intensely at each other.
RF: I thought you might want this. Turkey and avocado.
AA: Thanks, Ric. Want to join us?
RF: Don’t mind if I do. Been wanting to do this for years.
Flair stomps away at Triple H, punctuated by a number of “Whoo!”s. Flair then finds a randomly placed ringpost, climbs to the top rope and CONNECTS with a flying knee drop on Triple H!
Niles: Wow, I’ve never seen him do that!
AA: Only happens when he’s a face. Pretty cool, huh?
Niles, AA, Beast, Stank and Ric Flair leave Triple H lying in the middle of the random hallway.
RF: So what’s with this OOWF? Seems pretty cool to me…you guys have that old school feel of the NWA from the 70s and 80s. Really cool characters and great workrate. Well, except for that Viper guy. He seems a little light in the loafers… And what’s with the dude and the mouse? And that chickenshit Adrenaline guy? And who is The Rick anyway? Is he related to the dude that writes Online Onslaught? I’m a big fan of his…
[Edited because Niles and AA don't read minds.]
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Post by mooseheadjack on Jun 8, 2008 9:38:57 GMT -5
*Attitude Adjuster is seen consoling an obviously distraught and bruised Niles Anderson.*
Niles - ...and then the Beast popped out and I thought all was gonna be ok. Then HE started beating on me too! I mean, we're on the same team.
AA (putting his arm around the sobbing Niles) - It's all ok, Niles, it's all ok.
Niles - and look what happened to my shirt!!! It's all tattered and torn!
*Niles takes his shirt off AND THE BEAST POPS OUT!!!*
Niles - what, how the hell do you do that?
Beast - I don't know, I just do.
AA - Why'd you jump Niles, Beast? You hurt his feelings!
Beast - I just got caught up in the rush. Everybody else was doing it, so I said why not. I didn't even know who I was beating until people started screaming about title shots. Anyways, sorry man.
*Beast extends his hand to shake with Niles. Niles hesitantly grabs Beasts hand and shakes. The two hug (but not like that, only Donnie Viper hugs like that) and release their grip AND THE BEAST POPS OUT!!!*
Niles - What the hell!!!
Beast - sorry man, it's getting really bad these days actually. I think I'm coming down with something.
*Niles is still startled, as is Attitude Adjuster. Beast just stands there. Fade to Black.*
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Post by mooseheadjack on Jun 8, 2008 9:39:46 GMT -5
AA, niles, stank and ric flair are sitting and eating sandwiches that flair was kind enough to bring them. the beast enters the room, calmly and through the door.
B: sup guys.
NA: AAHHH!!
B: dude. whats wrong with you? i didn't pop out of anything or crash through the wall.
NA: sorry beast. i gotta admit, i'm a little jumpy around you now after that merciless beating you gave me.
AA: yeah man. that wasn't cool. i know you didn't realize who it was and stuff, but still, that shouldn't've happened.
RF: WHOOOOOOO! TURKEY AND CHEESE!!
B: (sighs) alright. listen. i hoped i wouldn't have to bring this up. i thought i could give the "caught up in the moment" excuse and we could just get past this and forget it, but i guess i'll have to come clean.
AA: what are you talking about?
RF: WHOOOO! OIL AND VINIGAR!!
B: ok. here's the deal. that wasn't me who attacked you.
NA: it wasn't?
B: no.
NA: sure looked like you.
B: well it wasn't. it was my evil twin brother, Monster.
AA: monster?
B: yeah.
RF: WHOOOOO! MAYONAISE!!!
NA: no no no. i dont buy that. first of all, he didn't have a goatee. everyone knows that evil twin brothers always have goatees.
AA: no. you're thinking evil parallel dimension dopplegangers.
NA: oh. right.
AA: what i dont get is, why wouldn't you just tell us in the first place? surely an evil twin brother is better than saying you did actually do it yourself.
B: i was just hoping i wouldn't have to bring him up at all. obviously, he's the black sheep of the family.
AA: you're not the black sheep of your family?
B: hell no. i'm the favorite son!
AA: ugh. remind me not to spend any holidays at your house.
B: well, anyway--
RF: WHOOOO! AND LETUCE & TOMATO ON WHOLE WHEAT!!!!!
B: ahem. anyway. so yeah. that was him. it wasn't me.
NA: so do you mean now on top of everything else, i have to worry about your evil twin brother coming after me too??
B: oh no. of course not. nothing like that. for the most part he's a complete non-issue. the only time he ever comes around is when somebody else uses me and has me do something out of character.
NA: like beat up your good friend niles anderson.
B: exactly. that was also him who popped out of HHH's sledgehammer. i cant pop out of sledhammers. no opening. i can only pop out of things that open up somehow.
AA: whoops. my bad.
B: dont sweat it. just be more careful. the less monster is around, the better.
*fade out*
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Post by mooseheadjack on Jun 8, 2008 9:40:15 GMT -5
Stank finishes eating his sandwhich.
Stank - You see that explains it Niles. I thought it was strange that Beast would attack you.
Niles - You thought THAT was strange? That whole episode was nuts.
Stank - Yeah fortunately we have a GM who doesn't have the patience for such BS.
The Rick walks in
GMtR - Flair? What are you doing here? I thought I told you and Triple H to get out.
Flair - WHOOOOO I like it here! You wanna sandwhich? WHOOOOO!
GMtR - No I don't want a sandwhich. Just leave before I call security.
Niles - Aw C'MON Rick! We like him. He makes great sandwhiches and he obviously likes it here.
GMtR - Look I have a HHH problem on my hands. Triple H won't leave until Ric leaves with him. The last thing we need is HHH coming over here and starting trouble. Besides Doesn't a legend like Ric Flair...
Flair - WHOOOOOOOOO! WHOOOOOOOO! WHOOOOO! WHOOOOOO!
GMtR - Yeah that's nice. Anyway...
Flair - C'mon Rick... say it with me.
GMtR - I don't want to.
Flair - ... Everybody.
Stank, Niles, Adiitude Adjuster, Beast ,Flair - WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
GMtR - That's it. You're all fired.
Stank - C'mon Rick. Lighten up.
GMtR - Stank, what are you doing here eating with these guys anyway? Don't you have a TLC match to prepare for?
Stank - Ric offered me a sandwhich... It was good.
GMtR - Stank go to your locker room please.
Stank leaves.
GMtR - You See? This is what I'm talking about. Ever since Jean-Paul and Ric arrived creative has fallen apar...
Flair - HEY! His NAME is TRIPLE H! He is the GAME. HE IS the greatest*heh* wrestler... *ha* Aliv.. Aliv.. Al ha ha HA HA HAHAHAHHAHA! WHOOOO! Who am I kiddin? C'Mon Rick you gotta let me stay. Do you see the bullshit they got me saying over at the E?
GMtR - Sorry Ric. I feel for you. I truly do, but here the only thing creative here will have you doing is serving sandwiches to Niles and AA. Plus working here you'll definitely recieve a cut in pay.
Flair - Cut in pay?... Hey HUNTER! Where are you buddy?
Flair leaves
Niles -You see what you did Rick? I'm going after him.
GMtR -The last thing the OOWF needs is an Invasion of WWE talent. You guys understand, right?
AA - Taste this.
GMtR - Look I don't want a sandwich.
Beast - Just taste it, Rick.
The Rick takes a bite of the sandwich.
GMtR - MMM. That's... That's damn tasty. What is that oil and vinegar?
AA -You See?
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Post by mooseheadjack on Jun 8, 2008 9:40:53 GMT -5
*OutbackJack, GatorBait, and Wally B. King are huddled around GatorBait's computer again*
GB: I thought I'd help us get the edge on Concrete and Moosey again, so I got the translated Japanese script of our first blood-spurting match with them back on 4/13/05...
*on the screen* Jack of the hinterland and jack and concrete TG Outback jack and GatorBait of GATORBAIT opposite MOOSEHEAD in applause of the fan make their methods in the ring. The jack and the concrete just a little, come to the ring, together in the reaction which is mixed. The fan vigor we would like to attach the American elk, but we would like to pour the voice of criticism to the concrete, therefore we obtain the sound of kind of YAAAAYYOOOOOOOO. In any case, you walk to ref depending upon the jack, in him, it is that normality which grinningly laughs at the jack slip of paper and wickedness grinningly you laugh, the concrete sees, barely being bothered, it transfers. The inland jack and the story of ref of GatorBait, as for those you make the unlucky glance of the surface nod, obtain. There is this which the announcer consults ref, should call to him: "Now the woman and the gentleman who are in accordance with the order of GM, acceptance of リック, and 4 authorized personnel disqualification STREETFIGHT of no it is match of the Invitational circle 2 of this OOWF! " That and the bell ring and 4 go with that. The ring being middle, square it does concrete and OBJ, exchanges the chop and the punch. Jack and Gator fall down to the upper rope, that of the Gator sound jack of the floor the chair and the crown jack on the head fight to the punch and grab. As for the jack rubber make legged and just a little between you obtain him whom Gator it keeps accompanying in kicking that feet from the surface separated. In the ring, as for the concrete it is reversed the rod which was tried in the rope, catches OBJ of the high knee on the surface. The concrete it pulls the jack in that feet, first moves to the surface of the turn buckle, and lowers the hooking of the corner, and the chop and the punch and the load. Outside the ring, the expedient jack of Gator before sliding to the ring, makes him of another chair which is shot horizontal. Gator pulls the concrete of the jack entering the ring,; It turns the concrete, in the mouth makes Gator of the punch horizontal. The concrete pulls Gator in that feet, hits against the detonating assembly on suplex above. In order that note to explode to jack and OBJ from the corner where hard clothesline where Gator crossing the ring, tears the mouth of the concrete which revolution of the concrete opened has been attached, it flies. As for the concrete are that hand and the knee of the blood which moves from that mouth. You insert MHJ with the ring where the chair has been attached. The chair which crosses the skull of Gator which tears him where that feet of back section CTG's, it fills up Gator slowly in the jack, the splash, and it closes sufficiently and opens is obtained. OBJ drops the concrete of the kicking which is hard in the rib, and goes after MHJ. Also the jack the sending kicking the revolution from OBJ which is returned, turns flight of the chair to the time when in addition now the blood of the sketch from MHJ is eaten on that surface. OBJ strikes MHJ in the rope, catches him of the destructive person of the rachis. 2 Tsugas it is broken depending upon the cover, but is with Concrete. The concrete pulls OBJ of MHJ, throws him outside the ring. The concrete focus of Gator which sends hovering to him in the mat which declines heavily with concrete decrease kicking Gator in angle of the surface. And him and brawl it continues sliding the jack from the ring outside OBJ. MHJ chooses the bottle, crosses the head of OBJ and breaks, now also OBJ and has attached the mask of magenta to the body, MHJ rolls the table which announces him with the Greek person, the mountain drives him through the table. The fact that MHJ uses just a little between OBJ, is obtained. He can slip the ladder and the table of the ring, and slides. It is in love with he who as for the concrete the lung Ra of Croc which is grasped by throwing the ladder to the mouth of Gator (the clutch of dollar Dream/Camel of 1000000) is troubled with the being broken eye of the jack, has in OBJ. The mutual jack and concrete glance in just a little between then set up the table. Gator is chosen even in MHJ, one corner, in the rising and the opposite corner of the upper rope of the concrete and does a certain ladder what put in place the fact that it stands with that corner? 叉 CTG it recovers the Outback jack, the ladder falls first, goes to bed vis-a-vis the table. On opposite side, MHJ him is put with the upper rope, therefore Gator between a certain, hits to Gator of the central punch. It ends OBJ and clotheslines him himself and MHJ on the upper rope it fills up. As for the concrete being set up as the ramp where the ladder is sweet from the upper rope separated slowly, then you become aware, it rises. As for CTG in the corner on the ladder the nest of the spider, to the table which moves, hits, it jumps, it shakes, he of hurracarana announces the table GB from the clamp and the upper rope separated and with Arthurian! Every holy hatchet わ! Every holy hatchet わ! Every holy hatchet わ! Concrete and Gator have died, perhaps it gushes forth. Just a little between it stops the jack, sees. MHJ to pull the chain from that tights, then awe is broken OBJ of that surface by applying blast. As for OBJ low blow you answer, roll MHJ to the ring. OBJ pulls out rummages and the wire entanglement under the ring. Around the head of MHJ which twists that it slides OBJ to the ring, is harder, is harder the blood until you pour, wraps that from the surface of MHJ. MHJ when OBJ turns with the OBJ eye carves him himself, (the wire entanglement remains), the jack releases him of the central part which is kicked and him of DDT around the head of MHJ. Outside the ring, you stir CTG and Gator. As for the person the both ring, cover now is in their knees which try the fact that it enters into making the jack, but Gator divides that outside due to MHJ of pulling. MHJ stops Gator with the pin vis-a-vis the ring post and pound. CTG makes that in the ring, raises the ladder. Concrete and OBJ meet, wobble both when starting rising, slug and OBJ, CTG that leaps the body stoop quickly, the head of OBJ from on the clamp, and the ladder separated, and hits to the cement mixer next next in the mat from on the ladder! As for influence the extent which either person cannot write in capital letter it is large. The sliding ring of jack and Gator, being mutual with each one and the wailing of the stick of kendo. Gator crossing the bridge of the nose of MHJ, pulls out the place where that of the stick of kendo which is shot is good. The jack becomes just a little between alternately, Gator it hits against the jack of the surface where the chair has been attached, still rolls to the table of the ring. As for jack and Gator the eye fighting on the rake of table and MHJ, attempt to the mountain drives GB through the table. At that time, how doing, as for CTG and OBJ there are feet. OBJ chooses the chair, wobbles roughly with CTG, the concrete avoids the chair, chooses one his himself, and crosses the head of OBJ and closes that sufficiently. OBJ declines heavily in the corner, he the stick of kendo crossing the surface and the neck of the clamp and repetition, OBJ when you close sufficiently, there is the glance where in the concrete it can come out penetration simultaneously with that eye. At that time, with the table, before the jack can finish the post damper, Gator through every holy hatchet わ of the table to CHOMP to low blow and opposite that hits! Every holy hatchet わ! With the wreckage how Gator doing, it meaning that ref calculates, crosses the jack because it retains, the arm where that last bit of feet of grab CTG's of the attempt strength OBJ of CTG has been attached the cover, maintains him from retention. Cruelly, and it repeats the revolution of CTG and the nose of OBJ of the being broken eye of the kicking his himself CTG's it kicks OBJ of the surface which tries the fact that you release pours the blood from that surface, but it does not allot OBJ in order to go. Ref counts 3, that is everything. 37:18 Outback jacks and the winner of GatorBait
WBK: Jack-o, maybe you should officially change your name to "Jack of the Hinterland"
OBJ: Very funny, Wally... but man am I glad we've got you for backup... you'll have to keep an eye out for that damned American Elk... looks like he was part of our first matchup, too..
GB: Hey guys, i was thinking of refining my catchphrase by further borrowing from other Feds... tell me what you think...
*GatorBait grabs the cameraman and stares directly into the camera*
GB: Don't Hate the Gator... HATE THE BAIT!... the CHOMP is HERE!... But I'm not telling you anything you don't already know...
*just then, Ric Flair is seen stomping down the hallway WHOOOOing his way to an aneurism as he tries to find HHH*
WBK: Oh bloody hell... looks like my main competition is here...
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Post by mooseheadjack on Jun 8, 2008 9:41:16 GMT -5
***Editors note*** Seraph is standing outside at the edge of a cliff with the roaring atlantic ocean tossing and rolling behind him. A maritime thunderstorm is raging around him and his words are being drowned out by thunder and punctuated with lightning. The following is what we could make out amidst the racket. ***End note***
Seraph: Firechild, I have warned you about the dangerous path you are travelling down. I have extended you grace time and time again in hopes that you would seek redemption and turn from your wicked ways - but you have been relentless in your wicked deeds. The day of reckoning is drawing [inaudible due to thunder] righteous judge. I am the sword of justice, and when the appointed day arrives I [inaudible]! You have turned your back on your true self and have denied who you were created to be. Even now I feel [inaudible] away.
Entity - do not think that I have forgotten our match this week. My anger burns against you Entity; I will raise my hand and strike you down. You are [inaudible] success - I pity you. You are not like those to whom I offer [inaudible] are beyond redemption. And when I come for you, I will come in judgement - swift and crushing. For you - the time [inaudible] and gone and I will delight in delivering propitiation.
You may not understand all that I am saying - but come Wednesday... [inaudible].
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Post by mooseheadjack on Jun 8, 2008 9:42:03 GMT -5
Capellan is walking down the street when a fine looking dark haired missy walks up and kisses him on the cheek....
C: Hey ther.....
---the world goes black-----
He wakes up, tied to a table in a darkened basement. Covered in what smells like petrol. The same dark haired girl, now clad in some fabulous black leather gear comes up and dabs some Everclear on the open cuts on his head that were not there before.....
Firechild looms over him, playing with his lighter.
FC: She's a beauty isn't she. Marvelous a pleasure....and pain.
<Cindy runs her hand up Firechild's arm, eyes full of lust>
------------------------- OOC: It's my promo dammit! -------------------------
FC: Im pretty hurt that you think Im a pussy, but rest assured I WILL defend my title myself this week, cause I dont need to send Ax or Cole to beat you, I can do that myself, and they're gonna be warming up for the embarrasment of Caps & Stank.
Capellan struggles and tries to get some saucy West Coast comeback, but his bonds stop the cheek escaping...
FC: OH, the San Francisco Sensation wants to add something? Well, youve said enough Capellan, maybe it's time you became the San Francisco Flambe'. You might like to think that Seraph has got to me, but now and at Mayhem, you will all realise that you still do not know what it is to...
He looks distracted and picks up a chess piece, sitting on top of a postcard depicting a windswept maritime shore...
FC:... how could...
Cindy comes up and asks him if he's OK, AX & Cole shout from the background that they should torch the prat and go... he shakes it off.
FC: NO, he'll keep, no fun in beating a burn victim. Lets go guys, Wilder & Westgaard will find him soon enough, just hope that ligature doesn't slip and cut of the circulation to his balls....
There are murmers of dissent but Ax, Cole & the girls follow him, leaving Capellan in pain, and VERY worried.
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Post by mooseheadjack on Jun 8, 2008 9:42:25 GMT -5
A cameraman follows Stank into his locker room.
Stank - Who you got in that bag?
FF Capslock - Caught me a marlin. Follow me out to the ring, partner. We got a message to send to 3 Piece Set.
Bag - mmmf!!, mmmf!, mmmmlF!!
FF Capslock - STOP strugglin!
FFC puts a boot to the body sized bag, lifts it up over his shoulder and he and Stank walk out to the entrance ramp. The lights flicker, Some Kind of Monster blares through the speakers, Pyro! and Stank and FFC walk out to the ring to a loud pop from the crowd. We see in the ring a table and two reinforced ladders already set up. FFC rolls the bag onto the ring and puts another boot to the writhing bag. Stank grabs a mic, curious. He waits for the crowd noise to die down a bit.
Stank - Who you got in the bag Capslock?
FFC gestures for Stank to take a look. Stank unties one end of the bag, peeks in, does a double take, then stands up.
Stank - Is that... Is that... TRIPLE H???
The crowd goes wild!
FFC unwraps a bound and gagged HHH from the bag. Triple H is seething red. FFC stands him up then KNOCKS him to the mat! Stank hands FFC the mic.
FFC - AX... COLE! I want you to take a CLOSE look at this. THIS is what we have in store for you. Untie him Stank!
Stank complies and immediately HHH throws a PUNCH to Stank's jaw! Stank takes the hit glares at HHH who is trying to beg off but only gets a BOOT to the face from Stank for his troubles. HHH is on the mat trying to beg off. FFC walks up behind him and lifts Hunter up and CHOKESLAMS him to the mat. Following FFC's lead Stank grabs Triple H and sets him up on a table.
FF Capslock - AX! COLE! THIS IS HOW WE ROLL... PUNKS!!
The crowd noise rises in anticipation as FFC starts to climb the ladder! FFC gets to the top and looks down at HHH on the table.
Stank - Wait! Hold on!
Stank then climbs THE OTHER LADDER and looks down at the barely conscious and unmoving HHH lying face up on the table.
Crowd - EC DUB-YA! EC DUB-YA! EC DUB-YA! EC DUB-YA! EC DUB-YA!
The crowd is going crazy! Stank and FFC raise their arms in the air and are about jump... when Nirvana's -Territorial Pissings plays through the speakers and GM the Rick walks down the ramp, mic in hand.
GMtR - Hold it! Hold it! Wait just one minute!
FFC looks like he is going to ignore the GM and jump anyway. FFC makes a broad gesture, points to HHH, points to the crowd and smacks his hands together suggesting the splat that will be if he were to jump.
GMtR - DON'T YOU DO IT CAPS! If either you jump from that ladder onto Triple H, I will suspend you indefinitely and your title rematch goes with it!
Crowd boos!
GMtR - Hey I'd like to see you guys splat HHH as much as the next guy, but do you have any idea the headache you will have caused this company when Vince McMahon finds out what happened to his son-in-law?
Ric Flair runs past GM the Rick and slides under the ropes he retrieves a groggy HHH and they exit the ring. HHH grabs a mic.
HHH - THIS IS AN OUTRAGE-AH!! I AM THE GAME-AH! LOVE ME OR HATE ME, WITHOUT ME..
GMtR - Shut up!
Crowd cheers!
GMtR - You will not get any mic time on MY show! Do I need security to escort you two out?
HHH glares at the Rick. He makes a move like he wants to attack, but Rick slowly pulls out a Red HOT POKER from behind his back! HHH glares at the poker, covers his ass with his hands and glares at FFC and Stank in the ring. He and Ric Flair slowly walk up the ramp and out the building. The Crowd cheers as Territorial Pissings plays and the Rick leaves. Then Some Kind of Monster plays. The crowd cheers as FFC and Stank climb down the ladders and make the international gestures for "we want the belts". Camera fades on Stank and FFC climbing opposite turnbuckles arms up-raised to a cheering crowd.
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Post by mooseheadjack on Jun 8, 2008 9:42:46 GMT -5
Some hours after Firechild's assault, Capellan staggers out of a taxi, passes the driver a bundle of Canadian money, and makes his way up to his hotel room.
Stripping off his still-damp shirt, he turns on the shower and turns back toward the camera -
"YAAAH!" he does a double-take and staggers backward, almost falling into the shower.
SFJ#36C gives him a pert smile,
"Capellan -" she begins.
"Woah, woah, woah." Capellan holds up a hand, "I'm trying to take a shower here."
"I know." SFJ#36C indicates her ensemble of transparent plastic raincoat and blue bikini, "I came prepared."
"Good for you. But you see, I don't normally take a shower with a young lady unless I know her a little better than I know you."
"Oh, don't worry about that." SFJ#36C gives a bright smile, "We don't get hired unless we're willing to appear like total air-headed sluts on national TV."
Capellan sighs,
"Fine. What was the question?"
"Firechild today made a sneak attack and a promise that he will be the one who comes to the ring on at Midweek Mayhem. Does this change your plans for the match?"
Capellan shakes his head,
"Fireboy proved my point. Not only did he launch a sneak attack - proving once more than his holding the Onslaught belt is a farce, and that so is the belt itself - but he lacked the stones to change his contract. Nothing's changed. I'm not going to take the belt off him, because it's not worth having."
"But he said he would face you -"
"This week." Capellan interrupts. "He said he would face me in the ring this week. He hasn't changed his contract, and he never will. Firechild? Firechicken is more like it. And that's my final comment on the subject, so please go away."
"But ..." SFJ#36C indicated her voluptuous form, "Don't you remember? I told you I was willing to appear like a total air-headed slut on TV?"
"I remember." Capellan rolls his eyes and points toward the camera, "I was talking to him."
As the door on the bathroom swings shut on the camera, we hear SFJ#36C gasp,
"Did the ligature cause all that swelling?"
"What swelling?"
And we fade to black on SFJ#36C's giggles.
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Post by mooseheadjack on Jun 8, 2008 9:43:07 GMT -5
Some time later Tommy Wilder and JW Westgaard are seen strolling down the hallway towards Capellan's room.
As Tommy goes to knock on the door, SFJ#36c strolls the door and is hooking up the clasp on here bikini top.
#36c: hi guys...go ahead on in Cap's in the shower....
JW: Uh ok....hey you've got something in your hai-
TW cuts off JW and snickers a bit: JW can't you see she's in a hurry......Have a good one #36C we'll give you a call if anything "comes" to fruition concerning our next match.
#36c: ok well. i'l see you guys later I've gto a Job to do!
JW: careful if you go outside the wind is really "blowing" out there
#36C turns the corner and walk down the hall
JW & Tommy: wah ha ha ha ha
JW opens the door and as he's walking in: Hey CAP!...now I see why you haven't been picking up your phone.
cut to commercial
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Post by mooseheadjack on Jun 8, 2008 9:44:49 GMT -5
MidWeek Mayhem Live! From Summerside, Prince Edward Island
Ross: Welcome to MidWeek Mayhem! The OOWF Canadian Violence 2005 tour rolls on, tonight we are live from Summerside, Prince Edward Island! Razz, as usual we have a great show tonight Razz: As always Ross, tonight we have four big title matches for the great fans of Canada! Firechild defends his Onslaught title against newcomer Capellan Ross: And boy Razz can that Capellan bring it in the ring. He seems extremely focused on Firechild; meanwhile Firechild seems to be EXTREMELY distracted by Seraph. If he doesn’t maintain his focus, he will be the first ex-Onslaught champion. Razz: You gotta stay focused, although it does seem like Seraph has really gotten into his head as of late. We also have LD Williams getting his shot at Blackdragon’s intercontinental title. Ross: That’ll be a good one, the one I am really looking forward to is 3Piece Set defending their newly won tag team titles against former champs FF Capslock and Stank, these four men have really turned this into a blood feud. Razz: They can hardly stand to be in the same building as each other, I predict the blood will flow freely tonight. Ross: Our last title match features Niles Anderson defending the world title against UnderDawg. The interesting part of this match is that Moosehead Jack has agreed to be in Niles corner. Razz: I guess we are seeing the hatchet buried somewhat between these two Establishment members, although I still wouldn’t trust either one of them in the least. Ross: No would I. Our first match tonight features the debut of two OOWF newcomers, Doctor Murder, well the only thing I know about this guy is that he is sick. He has no conscience, no regret, and the rumor is he is tough as can be. In other words, he should fit in here just fine. Razz what do you know about Mikey Styner? Razz: He is big, really big I believe he tips the scales at well over 400 pounds, and he can move around the ring pretty well for a man that big, and to top it all off, he has a mean streak nearly as big as he is, I predict these to will become a force to be reckoned with here in the OOWF Ross: Let’s head to the ring to find out.
DOCTOR MURDER & MIKEY STYNER vs. YVES VACHON & SHIVA SINGH [/b]
The two newcomers hit the ring and immediately attack their opponents. Mikey whips Vachon into the corner and connects with a crushing avalanche. Dr. Murder slams Singh’s head into the corner and chops away. Murder starts to whip Singh across the ring but pulls him back and hits a short power slam. Murder then grabs Vachon and choke slams him over the top rope to the floor below. Meanwhile Styner hits the ropes and splashes a helpless Singh. Mikey covers and the rookies get an incredibly fast win. WINNERS in 1:54 Doctor Murder & Mikey Styner
Ross: Wow, that was brutal. Razz: Well, man, that was something. If these guys are that good, people better watch out. Of course their level of competition will certainly step up, but, wow. Ross: Kind of leaves you speechless don’t it. Up next we have another newcomer, Mr. Jealous, who made his debut last week and now finds himself in the ring with former Intercontinental champion Johnny Adrenaline. Razz: That’s what I mean about the level of competition increasing quickly. One week you are facing some relative unknowns, the next you are facing a former intercontinental champion Ross: Mr. Jealous, well he probably should be called Mr. Intense, the man is all business in the ring, and he is tough to slow down, Mr. Adrenaline has his work cut out for him.
JOHNNY ADRENALINE vs. MR. JEALOUS
Johnny comes out looking extra motivated, even against the scary newcomer. Johnny slaps Jealous to start things, and MJ sarcastically wipes off his cheek. JA looks around and apologizes, but MJ is having none of it and just takes Johnny's head off with a clothesline instead. MJ military presses Johnny over his head, pressing him multiple times, then just drops him flat to the mat. Johnny rolls out to he floor holding his sternum. The ref counts to eight before Johnny gets back up on the apron, and JA hits Jealous with a shoulder to the gut and tries a sunset flip back in. But Johnny can't get the big man over, and MJ just hoists Johnny by the throat and tosses him halfway across the ring. Jealous moves in, but Johnny trips him up with a drop toehold and immediately stomps away at the knee. MJ pulls himself up in the corner, but JA kicks the knee again. Johnny grabs the leg and rolls out to the floor and slams MJ's leg on the apron several times, then wraps it around the ring post a couple of times. Johnny grabs a chair and goes to use it, but the referee pulls it away. As JA objects, Jealous kicks him to the guardrail. MJ gets to the floor and gives chase to Johnny and catches him by the leg before he can roll back in the ring. Johnny gets his balance on one foot and tries an enziguri, but Jealous ducks and Johnny kicks the post instead. MJ tosses JA in and gets a two count. JA begs off and MJ rockets him sternum first into a turnbuckle. Another trip to the corner for Johnny, this time coming to rest back first in the corner. Jealous charges with a clothesline, but JA pulls the ref in the way, and Jealous tries to hold up but can't quite stop himself. Johnny goes low on MJ then grabs the chair from earlier. Johnny takes his time and lines up the shot and BLASTS Jealous with the chair... and Jealous doesn't even flinch. Johnny's eyes bug out of his head and he hits him again. Nothing. One more time, and MJ yanks the chair out of Johnny's hands. JA looks at him to say, "Well, if you can do it, so can I." Jealous wallops him and Johnny hits the canvas like a sack of potatoes. Only problem is the referee saw it, and calls for the bell. WINNER by Disqualification at 8:10: Johnny Adrenaline.
Ross: I think it was pretty obvious Adrenaline wanted nothing to do with Mr. Jealous, but Johnny did outsmart the big guy to get a win, albeit a cheap win. Razz: Man, Ross, Adrenaline can do no right in your world can he? If you look at it, Johnny did the smart thing in this match. It was obvious Johnny was not completely prepared for Jealous’ power and unrelenting onslaught, so he did the next best thing, he outsmarted him and picked up the win. Had he tried to go toe to toe with him, Johnny would have been destroyed. Give the man a little credit Ross. Ross: I’ll give Johnny credit when he grows a spine and does one decent thing in his life. Razz: man, you could be waiting a while then. Ross: Up next we have an interesting match, a six man match featuring Moosehead Jack, Concrete, and Eric O’Mac on one side and Endo Mercury and Morte on the other. Razz: This all came about when Eric O’Mac’s partner Carl Coolname walked out on the OOWF and his partner, Jack and Concrete offered to pull double duty, so here we go. Ross: Perhaps it is the pessimist in me, but do you see something odd about this match? Razz: No, what? Ross: Look at the pairings, Jack, Endo and Morte are all Establishment members, Eric is an associate of the Establishment. Something smells fishy here, if I didn’t know better I would think Concrete and Mercury were walking right into a trap. Razz: Well, now that you mention it. But, Moose can’t touch Concrete or he is gone, and I think that also extends to other Establishment members, doesn’t it? Ross: Let’s head to the ring and see what happens.
MOOSEHEAD JACK, CONCRETE TG and ERIC O’MAC vs. ENDO, MERCURY & MORTE
MHJ has some words with Endo and Morte before the bell, and it's apparent that the old Establishment mates no longer see eye to eye. Mercury throws his two cents in the conversation, and Moose decks him with a right hand. Endo and Morte look to attack, but EOM and CTG charge in and the brawl is on. Mercury bails to the floor, and Moose follows. Concrete clotheslines Endo and EOM floors Morte with a reverse spin kick to the jaw. German suplex by CTG to Endo, and EOM follows up with Rolling Thunder. Mercury is still running from Moose, and heads up the ramp. Moose finally decides to give up and head back to the ring, where the referee is still trying to get some order. Morte hits a cross body on CTG, but EOM drops a leg on him before a count can be made. Moose rolls in and he and CTG hit a double DDT on Endo. Morte and EOM are brawling in the corner, and the official still cannot get a handle on the match. Moose hits Endo with the heart punch, and Endo falls thru the ropes to the floor. Moose, relentlessly, follows him out. Meanwhile, CTG and EOM hit a double superplex on Morte. Concrete moves in and CEMENT MIXER~! Eric goes to the top, but Mercury hits the ring again, and tosses something in EOM's face. O'Mac drops off the top rope. Mercury hops off the apron, but turns around into a BRUTAL chair shot from Moose. Concrete and Moose are the only ones standing, but Moose has a chair in his hands. The official apparently saw Mercury use a foreign substance on EOM. Put it altogether and the ref throws the match out at 2:58. NO CONTEST. WINNER – No Contest in 2:58
Ross: well I called that one wrong, it seemed like the Establishment is just not on the same page at all anymore. That one broke down out of control rather quickly didn’t it? Razz: well when you have six guys who really don’t have any issues with each other, things tend to get out of hand, plus these guys had almost no time to prepare any kind of strategy, so I think what we got is what could be expected. Ross: What do you expect from our next match Razz? Razz: I expect a classic match between two of the better wrestlers on the roster. Semaj has been on a roll as of late, and we all know Alt is one of the true rising stars in this company Ross: I agree Razz; this one should be a classic. There are some guys in the back who I sincerely hope will just sit back and watch this and learn from two masters in the ring, I know I can’t wait for this one.
SEMAJ B. vs. CHRIS ALT
Does my heart good to see two gentleman shake hands to start off a match. Quick lock up but SB forced to break when they end up in the corner. Backs away and they circle. SB teases a lock up, but shoots behind CA and gets a waist lock take down. CA quickly slips free and counters into a hammerlock, which SB counters into a kneeling headlock. CA snap mares him over and immediately gets a one count before SB gains the leverage advantage and pulls off a two count. Both up and this they do lock up, but CA hit several knees to the gut and a European Uppercut to stagger SB, who fires back with a chop just below the throat. CA reels back, only to hit a fall away drop kick that takes SB off his feet. CA ramps up the intensity before hitting another big move in the form of an inverted tornado DDT for 2. SB fights back with some rarely seen power moves including a military press into a gut buster that gets him a two. Another fast paced exchange ends with CA rallying with a pair of quick head scissors and a springboard shoulder tackle for 2. SB slows the match down with his superior mat game then kills CA with a release Tiger Suplex when he dares to go hold for hold with him. Cover only gets 2 and SB signals to the crowd that it’s over. After a quick sequence of float over and standing switch counters, CA commits himself to a high-risk move and lands awkwardly. SB capitalizes and attempts a LIVE AND LET DIE~! but CA manages to flip over SB’s shoulder, rebound off the ropes and hits a stiff lariat to put SB down. SB counters the SPINAL CONTUSION with a backdrop, but CA holds on for a roll through, but SB shifts the momentum and stacks CA with a unique pinning combination and keeps CA’s shoulders down just long enough for the three. WINNER in 14:49 Semaj B
After the match, Alt looks annoyed at the loss, but once he gets to his feet he shakes Alt’s hand and the two embrace and head to the back.
Ross: well you had that one pegged right Razz, that was a classic. Semaj should be in line for a title shot soon, and if Niles would ever be a man and give Alt his rightful shot, I think Chris Alt would be our new World Champion Razz: Well, Niles HAS beaten Chris Alt, so it is not as easy as you make it out to be, Niles is a hell of a competitor as well, but I agree, both men are at the very top of their game right now. Ross: Razz, we have mentioned guys not maintaining their focus properly. Some guys seem to be able to lock onto something and keep razor sharp focus at all times, for some others it seems to come and go, it certainly seems like Thim Reynolds falls into that latter category. Razz: Yeah it does, during the Onslaught tournament Thim was as focused as I have ever seen him, just 100%. But since the tournament, he has seem a little distracted, he hasn’t quite been able to get back on his feet so to speak. Ross: he has a good challenge tonight against GimmickMan, someone who will ring your bell and get that focus back where it should be. Razz: and if he doesn’t, then that will be all for Thim Reynolds.
THIM REYNOLDS vs. GIMMICKMAN
The ref calls for the bell and the two men move to the center of the ring and shake hands, they back off and circle each other. They move in for a lockup but GimmickMan sidesteps Thim and takes him down with a drop toehold, GimmickMan grabs Thim's legs, crosses them and moves up as if for an STF. Thim quickly rolls forward and out of the hold, kicking GimmickMan in the process. Thim quickly move in only to receive a deep arm drag, and another, and another. As Thim gets back to his feet GimmickMan move in again but Thim snaps in a huge belly-to-belly overhead suplex, woah!! The two wrestlers get back to their feet and stand opposite each other in the ring sizing each other up again as the crowd show their appreciation . . . OMG CHAIN WRESTLING STANDOFF!! The pair begins circling one another again and move in for a tie-up, Thim moves round and puts GimmickMan into a headlock followed by switch into a waist-lock and busts out a German suplex. Thim moves in while GimmickMan is down and takes control for the next few minutes, trying to apply several different kinds of stretch holds and pinning combinations but is unable to really lock on a hold or to keep GimmickMan down for the three count. The flow of the match changes suddenly when Thim reaches down to pick GimmickMan up and is suddenly caught up in a rollup!! One, two, thr- NO!!! GimmickMan bursts off the mat, whips Thim into the ropes and drives into him with a flying shoulder block. Thim is briefly stunned and GimmickMan takes the opportunity to build up some speed off the ropes and lands a brutal looking drop-kick to Thim's head as he's rising back to his feet While he's still down GimmickMan drives into Thim with a couple of elbow drops and stomps, bounces off the ropes and lands a leg drop straight on Thim's throat. While Thim is writhing in pain on the mat GimmickMan goes up to the top rope and dives off for a frog splash - meanwhile Thim has made it to his partly to his feet, just enough to catch GimmickMan on the way over, spin around and land GimmickMan with a power slam. Thim tries another cover but GimmickMan kicks out at two. While GimmickMan is down Thim locks on the Reflex-O-Lock and begins working away on GimmickMan's foot and ankle. GimmickMan rolls to try and escape the hold but Thim manages to roll with him and maintain the hold. GimmickMan is desperately trying to claw his way back to the ropes but Thim manages to drag him back to the center of the ring . . . after nearly a full minute of being able to hang on GimmickMan has no choice but to submit. WINNER in 15:55 Thim Reynolds
Ross: Well it certainly seems like Reynolds has his focus back, but there was still something a little off with him tonight, but honestly I cannot place it. Razz: I agree, there is something different about Thim, but he’s not talking, so we probably shouldn’t speculate on what’s going on with Thim. However, we can speculate on what it is about Seraph that is driving Firechild absolutely nuts, this guy knows something about Firechild that no one else knows. Ross: Well, if you had Seraph stalking you, wouldn’t you be a little off as well? I mean let’s face it Razz, the guy is just creepy. Razz: That he is Ross, but he is also a damn good wrestler, and I don’t think any of his spookiness is affecting Uncle Entity whatsoever. Ever since he decided to go it alone, Entity has been focused on bringing home some gold, beating Seraph would be a good first step tonight. Ross: one thing that bothers me about Seraph is that it just seems like the man never shows pain, how unnerving is it when you are throwing everything you have at an opponent, and he never shows pain? Razz: I have had that happen once in my career Ross, back in Philly I was fighting this crazy Jack guy, hit him with everything I had and he just smiled at me, threw my whole game off Ross: well let’s see if Uncle Entity can solve the riddle of Seraph
SERAPH vs. UNCLE ENTITY (w/Jesse Garon)
Seraph comes to the ring, stoic and expressionless as usual. The bell rings and we are underway. Uncle Entity goes on the immediate offensive backing Seraph into a corner with a collar and elbow tie up. Entity lays in some SICK chops that turn Seraph’s chest beet red, but as usual, Seraph’s expression doesn’t change at all. Seraph counters with a palm strike to the chest that staggers Entity back a few steps, then Seraph explodes out of the corner with a reverse bulldog. Cover only gets a one count. Both men quickly back up; Seraph whips Entity to the ropes and catches him with a snap power slam. Another cover, another one count. Entity bails to the outside, Seraph follows him out. As Seraph is pursuing Entity, he is distracted by Jesse Garon; Seraph turns his attention to Garon, which allows Entity to attack from behind. Entity rolls Seraph back into the ring and drops a knee into his lower back, then locks on a dragon sleeper trying to get the submission. Seraph reaches for the ropes, finally making it just as it seemed like he was losing consciousness. Entity pulls Seraph to his feet and grabs a side headlock; Seraph pushes him off into the corner. Seraph charges but Entity gets a boot up catching Seraph right in the face. As Seraph staggers backward, Entity climbs to the second rope and leaps off, catching Seraph right between the eyes with an elbow. Seraph hits the mat, dazed. Entity pulls him to his feet and hauls Seraph up for a brain buster, but Seraph shifts his weight and lands behind Entity. Seraph spins Entity around and hits a reverse Russian leg sweep, then grabs Entity’s legs and turns him into a sharpshooter. Entity tries to make it to the ropes, slowly clawing his way toward the bottom rope. At the top of the ramp Firechild makes an appearance, Firechild and Seraph’s eyes lock, and Firechild slowly makes his way to the ring, almost as if Firechild is in a trance. As Firechild gets to the apron, Seraph releases the hold and walks toward Firechild. Seraph’s expression never changes, and he doesn’t say a word. Firechild has a mix of fear and anger on his face. From behind, Entity slams into Seraph, knocking Firechild to the floor. Entity rolls Seraph up from behind, 1,2,3! Seraph can’t get his shoulders up in time. WINNER in 7:06 Uncle Entity
After the match Firechild levels Jesse Garon and grabs his guitar and slides in the ring, he waits for Seraph to get to his feet, lining him up for the el-kabong, but at the last second Seraph moves and the guitar crashes down on the head of Uncle Entity, laying him out in the middle of the ring. Seraph slips out of the ring while Firechild is staring at Entity. Firechild frantically looks for Seraph, then realizes he is gone. FC looks like he is going to snap.
Ross: Well, Uncle Entity picked up a nice win, that’ll move him closer toward getting an Onslaught title shot, but I think the real story of this match is what we have already talked about, the brewing issues between Firechild and Seraph, what is going on there? Razz: I’m not sure Ross, but this goes much deeper than Firechild just being determined to keep his title, there is something more there that we don’t know about, I have seen determination, and I have seen desperation, this strikes me as more desperation from Firechild than anything else. Ross: Razz, up next we have two guys who I just cannot figure out. SoulDragon decided to go it alone and stop teaming with Blackdragon, but success has not come too quickly way for him. We have another guy who seems to lose focus on occasion, in Dragon’s case he tends to do things that get him disqualified, if he could rear in those tendencies and keep himself a little more even, he could be near the top of the standings Razz: and Attitude Adjuster is just the opposite, here is a guy who always seems to be involved in the main events, he surrounds himself with the top guys, he worms his way into the main event constantly, but he doesn’t exactly have a sparkling record. But then again, that is certainly the smart way to do things isn’t it? Ross: well I am not sure I would agree with that sentiment; let’s see how things go for these two men tonight
ATTITUDE ADJUSTER vs. SOULDRAGON
SoulDragon is already in the ring when AA walks down the entryway with Beast as backup. Seeing this, SoulDragon waves to the back. Looks like he has backup as well. Could it be Blackdragon? It could get nasty out here! And SoulDragon’s backup is…Random Appearance Guy! Well, that was…umm…random. SD and AA lock up, and SD gains the quick advantage with a hammerlock. AA makes his way to the ropes, and complains to the ref about a hair pull. The ref’s not buying it, so AA jumps out of the ring and grabs Beast’s hair as an example to the ref. The ref still isn’t buying it, and Beast isn’t pleased. AA realized, takes his hand out of Beast’s hair and begs off. AA continues to back away, and backs right into Random Appearance Guy. RAG with a big right hand, another right and another, and tosses AA back into the ring. SD goes to work with rights and lefts, whip to the rope and a dropkick to the mouth of AA! SD continues for several minutes of crisp ~OMG WORKRATE, and AA sells like Little Giant Ladder Systems. (IT’S 24 LADDERS IN ONE!). SD looks to have AA in serious trouble, and goes for the SCHOOL OF DRAGONS ankle lock! AA is quick to get to the ropes, however, and rolls out of the ring. SD chases AA out of the ring, but in chasing is met with the CLUB OF DEATH from Beast! The ref sees it and ejects Beast from ringside! AA grabs SD and tosses him into the ring, and continues the advantage given to him by Beast for the next few minutes. AA finally props SD up on the second rope and delivers a vicious Superplex! AA rolls over for the pin, props his feet on the ropes…one, two, thr…NO! Random Appearance Guy knocks AA’s feet off the ropes! AA argues with the ref, and RAG is attacked from behind by Ric Flair! Ric Flair has finally come back to the OOWF! And he has sandwiches! WHOOO! CHOP!!! BLT!!!! WHOOO!!! CHOP!!!! PASTRAMI ON RYE!!!! The ref has lost control of this match…but he does get a meatball hero from Flair! AA takes the opportunity to roll out of the ring and slide in a chair. SoulDragon is still in the ring, and grabs Flair by the hair to pull him over the ropes. AA jabs the chair into the ribs of SD! The ref seizes the opportunity to get Flair to leave ringside. AA drops the chair, nails SD with the ATTITUDE ADJUSTMENT on the chair, and slides the chair out of the ring just as the ref turns. HE DIDN’T SEE A THING! AA hooks the leg; 1, 2, 3! WINNER in 9:16 Attitude Adjuster
After the match AA grabs the chair and waits for SoulDragon to get to his feet, just as AA is about to slam the chair across his head, Blackdragon slides into the ring and hits a release German suplex on AA. AA slides out of the ring and heads to the back. Inside the ring, SoulDragon and Blackdragon exchange the stare of mutual respect.
Ross: Once again Attitude Adjuster pulls a victory from the jaws of defeat. And how about Blackdragon saving his former partner. Razz: I am not really surprised to be honest Ross, those two went to war together, and while they may have had their differences, there is still a lot of mutual respect there. One day we may see them team again, or we may be treated to another one on one match between them. Time will tell. Ross: well put Razz. Next up, a couple more former tag team wrestlers, and I have heard rumors that one of them may be heading back to the tag ranks. Razz: well let’s not engage in idle speculation Ross, I have heard the rumors as well. Instead there is something that no one seems to be talking about a whole lot, last week some guy came out of the crowd and attacked Corax, then disappeared, what was that all about? Ross: I have no idea Razz, from what I have heard GM the Rick has the OOWF security team looking into it, and they have been told to keep an eye out for anything strange tonight.
MORTE vs. CORAX
Corax and Morte both make their way to the ring, and before the before the bell can even ring punches are thrown. Back and forth the two men go pummeling each other until Corax lands a super kick that sends Morte over the top rope. As Morte struggles to his feet on the outside Corax launches himself into the air with an absolutely wicked looking Asai moonsault that flattens Morte, but the move takes some out of Corax as well. With both men down the ref begins a ten count and at the count of seven Corax is back in to break it up. Morte is struggling to get back into the ring. Corax attempts a baseball slide but dodges and grabs Corax by the leg and throws him to the floor. Morte begins to work over the left knee of Corax. The ref is counting to ten again. Morte rolls in and out to break the count and after several kicks and knee drops on the Corax’s injured limb Morte rolls his opponent back into the ring and locks on a figure four. Corax fights the pain and eventually make sit to the ropes forcing a break. Corax with a left kick to the gut, Morte blocks it and grabs his foot and then coax hits him with an enziguiri. Morte is down; Corax is severely hobbled, but is to his feet. All of a sudden Donnie viper jumps out of the crowd and throws Corax his trusty chain and darts back into the crowd. “homo, homo, homo” chants the crowd (not that there’s anything wrong with that). Morte works his way to his knees and then is absolutely destroyed by a chain assisted shining wizard. Morte is out cold and flat on his back, but instead on covering him Corax hobbles over and locks in the Trickster’s Trap. Morte is out cold and the ref has no choice but to ring the bell. WINNER by submission in 8:12: Corax
Ross: It is sad, but Corax cheating to get a win just doesn’t surprise me anymore. Well, I will say this; enjoy it while you can Corax because karma will catch up with you at some point. Razz: Heavy words Ross, but you have a point, right now Corax is getting away with it, but you know at some point you have to pay the piper Ross: HOT ROD IS HERE? Razz: Not THAT Piper. Anyway, on to our next match, The Devil’s Brigade squares off with wCw, Wilder and Westgaard pulled off what some consider an upset last week, if I were a betting man, I would bet that they have The Devil’s Brigade attention this week. Ross: I guarantee they have their attention this week. Camby and O’Neil have been much quieter than usual, I can only assume it is to prepare for these two.
THE DEVIL’S BRIGADE vs. TOMMY WILDER & JW WESTGAARD
Tommy and JW are in the ring when Korn’ Got the life hits the loud speakers. Out of nowhere Camby and O’Neil attack, knocking JW out of the ring and focusing on Wilder. Camby hold shim while O’Neil begin s to talk some smack, punching Wilder in the ribs and slapping him in the Face until JW nails Camby from behind with a forearm shiver. Wilder then hits O’Neil with a roundhouse kick and sends him out of the ring. Camby and JW Face in the ring as Wilder goes to his corner. Camby and JW lock up and Camby pushes JW into a neutral corner and begin throwing massive body shots. JW blocks a punch and lands kick to the gut and DDT, then bounces off the ropes and hits Camby with a leg drop. JW covers and Camby kicks out at one. JW whips Camby into the corner and tags in Wilder who begins to pepper Camby with kicks to the legs and midsection. Tags back in JW who Attempts an Irish whip but gets reversed into a short arm clothesline. Camby over and tags in O’Neil. O’Neil is in and as soon as JW gets to his feet he nails JW on the chin with a Wicked Left Hook. JW drops like a sack of potatoes and O’Neil covers, but Wilder breaks up the count at 2. Camby is in and he and O’Neil are on wilder like wolves on a fresh kill. The two men are pounding away on the smaller man. Camby has him up and in a bear hug and is squeezing the life out of him while O’Neil is punching in the back. JW has now rolled out of the ring and O’Neil’s is after him and the two men brawl wildly around ringside. Camby finally lets go and begins to assault wilder with massive power moves. On the outside O’Neil whips JW into the Ring stairs and scrambles back into the ring. O’Neil locks him in the Gaelic Cloverleaf and Wilder is screaming in pain. Camby slaps on a key lock and The Devil’s Brigade has Camby stuck in Purgatory!!!! Wilder fights and the two men cinch it on tighter. The ref begins to check on Wilder but cannot get a response before JW is back in and blast Camby in the Head with a Hockey stick and Plants a Yakuza kick right between O’Neil’s eyes. JW points to the turnbuckle and Wilder runs over and climbs up, grimacing in pain. Westgaard picks up Camby, who now has quite the Crimson mask from the chair shot, and nails him with a side Russian leg sweep as Wilder Comes off the top rope with a drop kick. JW covers, but O’Neil breaks it up. Camby rolls out of the ring and O’Neil is left by himself and is backed into a corner. O’Neil begs off “Ric Flair” style. Wilder and JW look at each other and laugh but before they can do anything, O’Neil Nails JW for a second time with a Wicked Left Hook, and Wilder with a low blow. Blood comes pouring out of JW’s mouth as he lays on the mat. A very bloody Harper Camby tosses Wilder out of the ring. Camby then picks up JW and he and O’Neil try to set JW up for The Triple 6 but JW fights it. Wilder breaks up the second Triple 6 with a chair to the back of O’Neil, who falls off the top turnbuckle into the ring. Camby drops JW and eats a face full of steel chair, sending him out of the rings. JW to his feet, and looks at Wilder and mouths the word “thunder” Wilder smiles and lays the chair in the middle of the ring. JW picks up O’Neil for a power bomb. JW holds him up and powers him down as Wilder comes off the top with an Asai DDT on the chair. JW floats over and covers for the 1,2,3. WINNERS by pin fall at 33:21: wCw (JW Westgaard & Tommy Wilder)
Judas Priest’s “Hellion/Electric Eye” plays and Hellion comes out to the top of the ramp in a wheelchair.
**Speaking very quietly and haltingly**
“I had to come here tonight because, even though the doctor’s ordered me to stay in bed, I have something to say.
Corax, I don’t know how things got this far. I don’t know what I did to you for you to allow this to happen. When we both walked through the doors of the OOWF, I never imagined I would end up here like this today. We were the first Tag Team and the first Tag Champs and things happened very fast for us. Everyone was gunning for us, but that’s what happens when you’re the best.
We were supposed to watch each other’s backs. We were supposed to look out for each other. Well, I held up my side of the bargain. I even lost an eye doing it. And you? I’m not sure I understand what happened to you. You’re unhappy? You’re angry? You’re feeling you should still be a champ? You think you need someone to blame?
Well blame me! If you need something to make you feel better…. blame me! But see, I realize now, that placing the blame wasn’t enough for you. You had to have more. It wasn’t enough that I lost an eye. It wasn’t enough that I take a beating at the hands of the Devil’s Brigade. It wasn’t enough that we break up the best Tag Team the OOWF will ever see.
You had to see me suffer. You had to see me in pain. What were you really looking for? Did you want to see me dead? Well take a good hard look at this!”
**News footage of the EMT’s working on Hellion is shown on the jumbo screen**
“Take a good look because that, right there on that screen, is what you’re seeing. I died that night! Heart stopped! Not breathing! Dead! Only through the skill and care of these highly skilled Canadian doctors, and one Veterinarian, was I able to come back to this world.
I hope you’re not too disappointed. But I’m not dead yet. But while I lay in that hospital bed, I had a dream. Some would call it a vision, but I don’t go for that crap. I my dream, I saw you standing over me, laughing at me, spitting on me. I looked up at you and asked you why, but you only laughed harder. Then you turned away and I saw the face of the Devil and he was laughing too. It was then that I realized I was looking straight into the mouth of hell. I felt rage burning in my brain and I tasted blood in my mouth and I knew that I could not let any of this go unanswered. When I woke from that dream, I decided that no matter how long it takes, no matter how much more pain I have to go through, I coming back to the OOWF. And when I get back Corax, you better be ready. Because HELL HATH NO FURY LIKE THE HATE I HAVE FOR YOU!!!”
**Music plays as Hellion wheels himself to the back.**
Ross: I would not want to be in Corax shoes when Hellion makes his return. Razz: You said it Ross, Hellion is one of the most intense men I have ever seen, and even though Corax brutality is well known, Hellion can match him in the ring shot for shot. Ross: It amazes me that those two used to be partners; the hatred that exists between them is downright frightening. Ross: Well, both feel like they have been wronged, and while I tend to side with Hellion on this one, there is no question that it is providing supreme motivation for brutality by Corax Razz: and it doesn’t hurt that he has the Devil’s Brigade backing him up as well. Ross: No, it certainly doesn’t. Razz: Next up, match two of the best of three series between Moosehead Jack and Concrete TG and Outback Jack and GatorBait. Ross: I gotta say I was really impressed when Moosehead Jack challenged Jack and Gator to a best of three series, it was probably the biggest show of sportsmanship that I have ever seen from him. Razz: I wouldn’t get too used to it Ross, Jack is not going to win any Sportsman of the year award, and for that matter I don’t think any of the guys in this next match will win that award tonight. Ross: No, I wouldn’t say that at all. These four men are very familiar with each other, I expect a brutal knock down drag out battle, let’s head to the ring.
OUTBACK JACK & GATORBAIT vs. MOOSEHEADJACK & CONCRETE TG
Jack and Concrete head to the ring, no pyro, no music, no superhero, just Jack and Concrete. They get in the ring and head right to their corner; they appear to be all business tonight. Concrete starts out with GatorBait. They circle each other tentatively then meet in the center of the ring with a collar and elbow tie up. Concrete gets a deep arm drag, GB springs right back to his feet and they meet in the middle of the ring again. Concrete grabs an arm, wrings the arm a couple times and pulls Gator over to the corner. Tag to Moose who comes in and snaps the arm, ducks under GB’s arm and takes him over in a fireman’s carry to the mat. My God! Wrestling from Jack! Jack mounts Gator and pounds away with some brutal forearms to Gator’s face. So much for that. Jack pulls Gator to his feet and sends him to the ropes; Jack follows him and connects with a flying clothesline over the top rope. Both men to the outside. Jack pulls Gator up and the two men exchange brutal shots outside the ring. Outback Jack comes around to where they are fighting, but Concrete darts across the ring and leaps over the top rope and stops Jack in his tracks. Concrete whips Jack into the railing then slips back into the ring. Meanwhile, Moose and Gator are still pounding away; Gator gets the best of Jack with a jab to the throat. As Gator climbs on the apron to get back into the ring, MHJ walks over to him and tries to power bomb Gator off the apron. Gator holds on to the ropes, Concrete comes across the ring and hits Gator with a shining wizard, Gator staggers and Jack pulls him off the apron and power bombs him through the Algerian announce table. Jack immediately slides into the ring and he and Concrete isolate Outback Jack. Moose charges in and goes low around Jack’s waist and BJ immediately starts clubbing away on Moose’s back and neck. Concrete stings OBJ with a super kick knocking him back into the corer. Concrete charges into the corner and monkey flips OBJ out of the corner, Jack lands on his feet, then gets DESTROYED by a MHJ clothesline. Concrete hits a moon sault out of the corner and makes the cover, but GatorBait makes it back into the ring and breaks up the count at two. The match breaks down as all four men brawl in and out of the ring. The referee frantically tries to get the action back into the ring. Jack and Gator slide back into the ring, both men are sporting bloody cuts on their foreheads, on the outside, OBJ reverses a whip attempt by Concrete and sends Concrete hard into the stairs. Inside Jack kicks Gator low and goes for a DDT, but OBJ hits the ring and makes the save with a big clothesline that levels MHJ. As Jack gets to his feet, OBJ and GB go to opposite corners, setting Jack up for the CALL OF THE WILD! As Gator goes to leave his corner, Concrete grabs his foot and pulls him out of the ring and DESTROYS him with a cement mixer on the floor. MHJ catches OBJ going low and hits him with a DDT. Concrete slips back into the ring, MHJ lifts OBJ in a bear hug and Concrete comes off the ropes with a Hart Attack clothesline. As OBJ hits the mat, MHJ locks on the Indian Death Lock, Concrete keeps Gator out of the ring, and OBJ is forced to submit. WINNERS in 22:44 Moosehead Jack & Concrete TG
Ross: I am not going to take anything away from Outback Jack and GatorBait, I think they are an outstanding team that will wear the world tag team titles one day, but I have to say, ever since Jack and Concrete really decided to focus on winning, they have come a long way. They needed this one tonight to force a third match, and they came through in the clutch. Razz: Well, Ross, a big part of that is being able to trust your partner. Jack and Concrete are two polar opposites, and even though the contract says they can’t touch each other, they each know there are a lot of people who have each others backs, and who would not hesitate to get involved. I think they finally know that there is not going to be any sneak attacks, nothing like that, it makes a world of difference. Ross: It does make a world of difference. Two guys who seem to have absolutely no trust of each other, no love lost, no respect, and no desire not to hurt the other are Mark Vander and Donovan Viper Razz: There is something about these two; it’s like oil and water, or like pouring gasoline on a fire, very combustible. They had a brutal chain match last week, and they are at it again, both men requested another match, so their issues are far from settled. Ross: and their saga continues tonight
DONOVAN VIPER vs. MARK VANDER
The ref announces Vander, no one comes out, so they announce Donovan Viper, no one comes out. The announcer and the fans look perplexed. They run through the announcements again but nothing. Finally the ref starts to head to the back when Vander and Viper come bursting out onto the ramp, already engaged in a wild out of control brawl. Vander has a kendo stick, Viper has a chain, and they take turns wailing on each other. Vander lands a brutal kendo shot right at Viper’s head that opens a bloody gash. Viper falls to the steel, and blood pools on the metal. Vander waffles Viper with repeated kendo shots to the back leaving huge bloody welts. Donovan Viper has had about enough of that, so he wraps the chain around his fist and upper nuts Vander. Vander collapses in a heap, gasping for breath. Donovan crawls over to Vander and mounts him and pounds away on Vander’s forehead until Vander is a ghastly mess of blood. Finally Viper grabs Vander by the head and pulls him toward the ring. Vander rolls in first and Viper follows, but Vander hits the ropes and connects with a clothesline from hell that nearly decapitates DV. Vander covers, but Donovan gets his foot on the ropes at two. Both men up, Vander staggers Viper with a couple of jabs to the face, then clotheslines him over the top rope. Mark Vander staggers around the ring for a moment; he grabs the ref’s shirt and tries to wipe the blood from his eyes. The ref turns his back looking at the announcer for help, when he does, Vander takes off with a suicide dive over the top rope, Donovan Viper is waiting for him and catches him with a chair to the face as he leaps. Vander is out. Viper picks him up and slams his face into the side of the ring a few times, then sets him up for the sidewinder, but Vander powers out of it and reverses it into a tombstone on the concrete floor. Now Viper is dead. Vander slides back into the ring and the ref starts the count. DV gets to the apron at eight and Vander breaks the count. Viper is on the apron facing the crowd, barely hanging on, blood pouring down his face. Vander grabs him from behind and tries a belly-to-back suplex back into the ring. In mid-air, Viper reaches into his tights and pulls out a pair of brass knuckles and blasts Vander right between the eyes. Vander falls backward to the mat, out cold; Donovan Viper floats over, tucks the knucks back into his tights and makes the cover. The ref never saw a thing and makes the three count. WINNER in 18:07 Donovan Viper
Razz: man, pure hatred. Pure disregard for the others body. If this keeps up these two are going to shed a lot of blood. Ross: and what are they even fighting about? What happened for these two to have such pure hatred for each other? Razz: you gotta understand, sometimes there is nothing, you don’t need a reason, you don’t need a story, there is just pure hatred. Some guys just don’t like each other, and they take that out on each other in the ring. That’s what I see from those two. Ross: well I remember that happening years ago to two guys in the Georgia territory, their blood lust for each other was unquenchable, and it ended up costing them their careers, I would hate to see that happen to these two as well. Razz: You have to be really careful, it is easy to let your hatred for someone cloud your vision, you become all consumed with destroying your enemy, you get almost a tunnel vision where all you can think about is your enemy. Ross: I worry that this is what can happen to Hardbody Harris and Beast. Since Beast turned on Chris Alt and joined up with Niles and Attitude Adjuster he has also taken out his aggression on Harris. They have barely scratched the surface; I hope someone has the sense to stop them before they destroy each other.
BEAST vs. HARDBODY HARRIS
Beast and HH don’t even pretend to wrestle as they immediately trade slobber-knocking blow after blow. Beast’s might finally overcomes HH’ tenacity and Beast wears HH down with a few front and shoulder mounted slams before busting out a wicked half crab with his knee buried in HH’s spine. HH refuses to quit and to Beast’s shock, actually drags the larger man towards the rope. Beast releases the hold and drills his elbow in HH’s lower back before dragging him back into middle of the ring and applying a reverse chin lock with his knee in the back. HH feeds off the crowds’ chants and slips free of Beast grasp by prying his fingers from his face and throwing Beast off balance. It’s all HH from here, hitting some of his trademark moves including an impressive delayed vertical suplex and the 10 punches in the corner. Beast stumbles out of the corner right into a huge clothesline that staggers him. HH tries a leaping lariat, but Beast ducks just enough to avoid the arm and catches HH with a huge spine buster. Beast yanks and HH and taunts the crowd before loading up a power bomb. HH punches free, lands on his feet, and pulls Beast down into a jawbreaker. HH sets Beast up and in another display of Super Harris strength, nails Beast with the ONE AND ONLY~!!! Unfortunately for HH, Beast fights it and “accidentally” kicks the ref in the face as he goes up. Ref is out and HH attempts to revive him. Beast recovers, but plays it cool until HH wanders back over and sets up the TO BE EDITED IN LATER~!!! Ensuring the ref is still out of position; Beast destroys the No. 1 Testicles in the OOWF with a vile low blow. Doubled over, HH leaves himself open for a ring shaking power bomb. Pulling HH back up, Beast completes the job with a BIG CLUB O’ DOOM~!!! Not quite content, Beast mauls him with another Death Club, still wanting to inflict more punishment, Beast pulls Harris up, and choke slams him to the mat, the ref fearing Harris is really injured stops the match and rules it a no contest. WINNER No Contest in 18:59
This does not make Beast very happy, so he grabs the ref and choke slams him as well, then leaves the ring to a chorus of boos from the concerned crowd.
Ross: That is just going too far, Beast is not trying to win a match, he is trying to end Harris’ career! Razz: Beast is asserting himself, he is… Ross: Just stop! Don’t even try and justify his actions! There was no excuse for what Beast just did, none. I hope GM the Rick sees what Beast has done and punishes him properly. Razz: Well what I was trying to say is Beast is just asserting himself, and not necessarily in a good way. Beast is an animal, no doubt, and hanging around Niles and AA is only going to bring out the worst in him. If Harris is not seriously injured, and Ross we both hope he is not, he is going to want to settle the score Ross: Which worries me. Harris has much too bright a future to get bogged down in a war with Beast. Razz: Speaking of wars, hey what an awesome segue, Canadian Dragon and Microplay have been to war before, and this is yet another feud that doesn’t seem to have an end in sight anytime soon. Ross: And once again, all this is doing is damaging careers. Canadian Dragon should be after Firechild’s Onslaught title, not putting his body on the line against Microplay every week. Razz: And don’t forget in that big eight-man elimination match last week Dragon got a win over the world champion Niles Anderson Ross: And Microplay desperately wants to regain the world title and become the first ever two-time world champion. Razz: Well only one man can win tonight. CANADIAN DRAGON vs. MICROPLAY
Lockup to start and they fight into the corner a couple of times, no clean breaks, and a shoving match results. They exchange chops and Microplay takes Dragon down with a headlock, but Dragon powers out, hitting MP with a Death Valley driver! Dragon hits a stiff dragon kick on MP who stumbles out to the floor. The crowd cheers as Dragon jumps over the top rope and nails Micro with a shooting star press! Dragon brings MP back in for a snap suplex and a quick backbreaker that gets two. Dragon goes for a Tiger Driver, but MP blocks and locks on a figure four leg lock! Dragon fighting as the Canadian crowd is clearly behind him. MP senses that Dragon and grabs the bottom rope. the ref doesn't see this as he checks on Dragon. Dragon's shoulders are down for a two but the crowd gets behind him and he starts to reverse. Dragon has the moved flipped now, and manages to switch into a sharpshooter! MP is too close to the ropes though and the move is quickly broken up. Dragon goes for an arm bar, but Microplay reverses and snaps off a small package for two. Rolling cradle from MP gets two as well. Dragon comes back with a spinning dragon kick, but Micro blocks and hits an inverted DDT. MP slams Dragon a couple of times and goes up with the flying elbow, but CD rolls out of the way. Dragon goes up and follows with a 450 splash that gets a close two. Dragon picks MP back up and goes for a springboard cross body, but MP counters with a body slam. Micro follows it up with a standing dropkick for two. Another backdrop suplex gets two. Microplay drops an elbow on the back then tosses Dragon into the corner. He charges in and eats boot, then Dragon springs up and hits a split-legged moonsault. That only gets two and Dragon looks frustrated. He picks up Mp and gives a stiff knee shot right to Micro's skull. MP looks dazed and Dragon goes for another springboard moonsault, but Micro catches him and drops Dragon down with a pile driver. MP goes up to the top again for the elbow drop, but Dragon spring up and starts hammering away. MP goes for a superplex, but Dragon counters mid move and locks on the Dragon Sleeper. Micro is fighting, but he's got nowhere to go and taps out to give Dragon the win. WINNER in 26:19 Canadian Dragon
SFJ 23: Tonight you defend your title against LD Williams for the second time in less than a month. Any comments?
BD: Well…first I wanted to thank Mr. Williams for giving me a hell of a match last time we stepped in the ring. It felt good to have an intense, back and forth wrestling match without worry about cheap shots to the nuts or chair shots to the back of the head. I saw something in you LD. Something I hadn’t seen since we first started this federation. I saw that spark rekindled. I like that LD. The LD that would rather take a loss after wrestling a classic match than one that would take a tainted victory. Now last time we were in the ring together, I wanted to shake your hand. But Johnny-PGA thought it would be more fun to take a golf club to my head. I want to believe that you would have shaken my hand like the man I know you are. Like the competitor I saw in your eyes. I know what the boys in the back and what Ross might say about you and how they believe it’s just a set up to get my title off me. But I want to believe you’re better than that. Prove them wrong LD. Prove them wrong. And as for Johnny Boy, you need to worry less about my matches and worry about racking up a few Ws. The next time you feel the need to bad mouth my reign as champion, or sneak attack me, or talk about winning back YOUR Inter Continental Championship, take a second to realize just how far you’ve fallen. You’re slipping buddy. I bet your stomach’s full from all those losses you’ve been eating lately. By the way Johnny, how’s it taste mutha f (bleeped because this a family show, or will be one day if we ever get a t.v. deal). Just remember whose waist this belt is around. LD, see you in the ring.
Razz: Some words of respect there by Blackdragon, I am not surprised. LD Williams gave him a helluva match last week, and if not for Adrenaline I really think Williams would have shaken his hand Ross: I may not always like Williams’ choice of friends, or some of his methods in the ring, but you will not find a man in the back that doesn’t think he is one of the toughest guys on the planet. I don’t always agree with him, but I respect him. Razz: That’s a rare thing Razz, when you have the respect of the boys in the back, which is about the ultimate sign of respect in this business. Ross: Well, Williams has certainly earned the respect. Next up we have Firechild defending the Onslaught title, quite honestly, I would be surprised if Capellan, the sensational rookie, doesn’t walk out of here with the title Razz: Firechild’s head just doesn’t seem to be in the game. Seraph seems to really be in Firechild’s head, and when you are facing someone with the talent of Capellan, you need to be 100% focused on him, or you will find yourself pinned very quickly. FIRECHILD vs. CAPELLAN
Capellan is in the ring first, as Firechild comes to the ring, his usual swagger is replaced by paranoia. He keeps looking around, like he is looking for someone, or waiting for someone to come at him. More than once a fan would reach out and slap Firechild on the shoulder and he would turn ready for a fight. By the time he gets to the ring, he is already frazzled. He gets to the middle of the ring and still seems to be looking for something, so Capellan steps up and slaps the taste out of his mouth. We hear Capellan yell, “what are you looking for? I’m right here!” Firechild begs off, telling Capellan to wait one second. FC leaves the ring and starts looking under the ring apron. Finally Capellan has had enough, he gets a running start and dives over the top rope, catching Firechild and sending him slamming into the steel guardrail. Capellan shoots FC back into the ring and waits on the apron. As Firechild gets to his feet, Capellan springboards into the ring and catches FC with a hurracarana into a pin attempt. Firechild manages to kick out at two, but then slides right out of the ring and continues looking around. Inside Capellan is getting very frustrated; he hits a baseball slide on FC that sends him sprawling up the ramp. Once again, as Firechild gets to his feet, Capellan flies off the top rope with a spectacular moonsault to the outside. Firechild is down. Even with all the offense Capellan is showing, Firechild still looks very distracted. Capellan pulls Firechild to his feet, and shoots him into the ring again. Cap follows him in and whips FC to the ropes and catches him with a Northern Lights suplex into a bridge. FC rolls his shoulder at two. Both men up again, Capellan flips Firechild over to a sitting position and lands some stiff tajiri kicks to his back. FC is flat on the mat writhing in pain. Capellan springs off the bottom rope and lands a knee drop right on FC’s sternum, another cover, FC barely rolls his shoulder at two. At this time, Ax and Cole make their way to the ring, but they don’t even make it half way down when wCw charges out and stops them. The four men brawl on the ramp. This brings out The Devil’s Brigade to ambush wCw, and quickly coming to their aid is FF Capslock and Stank. Now it is an eight-man brawl at the top of the stage, security and the road crew (wait, is that Ric Flair?) are all out trying to separate the men. Mean while inside the ring, Firechild is up, Capellan grabs him and destroys him with an F5 and then Capellan climbs to the top rope for a missile dropkick. Fireshild staggers to his feet. Just as Capellan is about to leap, the arena goes dark, then slowly fills with a blinding white light. We see Seraph in a brilliant white room, dressed all in white. The camera focuses on his stoic face, his lips never move, but we hear him speak, in barely more than a whisper
“The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he who, in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of the darkness. For he is truly his brother's keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know I am justice when I lay my vengeance upon you. I am that shepherd. You don't understand now... but you will."
The lights fade and the house lights come back on, Firechild is standing in the middle of the ring with a crazed look on his face. Capellan has climbed down from the ropes and stands and looks confused. Finally Firechild leaves the ring and runs to the back. Capellan looks confused and angry and chases after Firechild trying to get him back into the ring, but Capellan can't catch him in time, and by the time he realizes that he could win the title by letting Firechild get counted out, it is too late for him to get back to the ring. The ref has no choice and counts both men out. WINNER double countout in 6:29
Ross: Well, I think that absolutely proves it, Seraph has gotten inside Firechild’s head, that man is not in his right mind. Razz: I have never seen a champion as rattled as Firechild, he was completely dominated by Capellan, and had it not beef for Seraph, he would have lost the match tonight. He was just not in the match at all. Ross: It seems completely odd that the man that has pushed Firechild to the very brink, is the one who saved his title tonight. Razz: Well, I don’t think it was intentional, or was it? With Seraph, you honestly never know. Right now, Seraph is the master of mind games and he has Firechild wrapped around his little finger. Ross: Firechild needs to regroup quickly; otherwise, HE will be the one in 3Piece Set with no championship gold. Razz: Ax and Cole won the gold last week, well Ax and Firechild won the gold last week, they have the Freebird clause that allows and two members of the team to defend the titles in any given week. Ross: It is pretty sad when the team that held the titles longer than anyone in OOWF history has to resort to loopholes to regain their titles, although it is certainly not shocking. Razz: and right now, Capslock and Stank are plenty angry, they are not someone I would want angry with me.
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