MidWeek Mayhem (11/24) Live! From Black Earth, WI

[BookerShark]

Fade in as we see Jewel outside with a shovel. There's generic rap music playing in the background. Jewel takes the shovel and swings it like a bat. It smacks against something off camera with a thud. We can also hear J-P Sparxx's voice coming from somewhere.

J-PS: Yeah, man, I want extra pepperoni. I luvs me ma pepperoni.

Jewel swings the shovel again. Whack.

The camera pans to the side and we see J-P talking on his cell phone, holding his shirt up to expose his abs. Jewel takes the shovel again and swings it, smacking him in the stomach. He barely flinches.

J-PS: Thirty minutes or it's free, right? Yeah, dat's what I'm talkin' 'bout.

J-P smacks his phone closed as Jewel hits him one more time. He looks to the camera and grins.

J-PS: Shovel don't do much damage does it, moron? Look at dees...

J-P moves his hand like a model showing his perfect abs.

J-PS: You can't hurt me foo. Mr. Roid Case with his big ol' shovel. You think you scare me bitch? I dun think so, knowwhatI'msayin'? I can take whateva yo bitch ass dishes out. All. Night. Long. (he accentuates All. Night. Long. with a few dance moves)

Jewel plants the shovel into the ground and puts her arm around her man.

J-PS: I'll admit, I got a li'l stage fright last week. Dis week, it'll be diff'rent son. I ain't sharin' da stage with a masked freak who lives in a basement with his moms. I got yo bitch ass one on one and I do plan on beatin' yo ass and winnin' dat World Title belt. It'll look so damn good 'round dis waist daRick will be beggin' me ta never take it off 'cuz it never looked so damn good. Not even on dat red head hottie ex-champ. Shame 'bout her mind, but shit happens, yo.

J-P drops his head for a second like he's actually affected by it. He then raises it quickly.

J-PS: Yo baby, how 'bout a few more reps 'fore da pizza gets here?

Jewel: Sho baby.

Jewel grabs the shovel, winds up and smacks J-P again in the stomach.

J-PS: All. Night. Long.

[BookerShark]

(Tytan is watching all the action on a nearby monitor.)

Tytan: Well...well...well...it seems like Cubbie does have a pair after all. Bravo for him! And the violence that is going on, well there is no one to save us now!

(Tytan laughs)

Tytan: Now, Sparky. You Jersey Shore reject....I ain't your little bimbo. I don't have to worry about all night long, simple because I don't need it when it comes to you. You aren't in my league, and you never will be. So shut up and Wednesday take your beating like a man, and not the chump you are.

Oh and Fire enjoy the little vacation. Nice of you too look out for her like that Davin. Maybe I will send you a check to make sure she stays down there longer so she can get better.

Evans be prepared you just set a beast loose. I would watch you back....hell I would watch your front too. Moose can be coming from anywhere.

(FADE)

[BookerShark]

WIPE to a black and white view and then PULL BACK to show the locker room of The Crusher Stan Fulton. OOWF-TV is on, showing on an old 13” black and white Zenith TV. PAN from the television to Former AWA Announcer Larry Nelson standing with Stan Fulton.

LN: “Stan Fulton. Quite a hullaballoo going on here in Wisconsin.”

SF: “It’s only going to get worse since the Packer victory this afternoon, Larry. I’ve had to pack my Favre jersey and send it back home. Time to pull out the Wild jerseys for the rest of the winter. Being a Minnesota sports fan is like being kicked in the jimmie by your best friend day in, day out.”

LN: “Let’s talk about this week. You’re not on the card. Why are you still here?”

SF: “Because, Larry, Matt Folz and I should right now be the OOWF World Tag Team Champions. No one in that arena that night other than the referee, thought different. Even Texpress cannot look themselves in the eyes and think they won that match.

“So saying that, Matt and I have been working the phones and trying to get ourselves a match this week. We want to show that when we roll into my home state of Minnesota that we’re still the number one contenders for the title. We want to turn the state that suffers from the most unfulfilled sports expectations into the home of the start of our tag team title reign. We want a shot at those titles next week in Blue Earth.”

LN: “Where is Matt Folz by the way.”

SF: “He’s out celebrating a Green Bay Packers win. If I recall what Green Bay fans do to celebrate, he’s going to get raving drunk, make out with his sister and then throw up in the kitchen sink. Tomorrow morning, when he gets done with his hangover and he showers, we’ll start training again. We’re not sitting back on our laurels. Though I think I sat on a Lauren once.

“The funeral was nice.”

LN: “Thanks, Stan. Good luck on Wednesday.”

Fulton walks off and we FADE.

[BookerShark]

SFJ#5 - Ladies and Gentleman... Stank

*The camera pulls back in a wide shot to include SFJ#5 and Stank*

SFJ#5 - You have a shot at becoming a Grand Slam Champion at Midweek Mayhem.

Stank - Yeah... and all I have to do is beat fucktard and my good friend Billy Dee to do it.

SFJ#5 - What about Bryce Larson?

Stank - Who?

SFJ#5 - Bryce Larson... he's in the threeway dance for the shot at the Onslaught Title with you and Davin Moreland.

Stank - Bryce Larson?

SFJ#5 - He had a killer feud with Chris Evans not too long ago.

Stank - I know Chris Evans and if he thinks he'll getaway with the same crap he pulled earlier with Moose during his IC title defense at Mayhem... a match where I am the referee...? Think again. I will NOT put up with that shit... repercussions will be swift... and painful.

SFJ#5 - And what if Moose were to try the same? Do you plan on calling the match down the middle?

Stank - Are you suggesting that I would favor my friend and tag team partner, a man who shared with me a membership of The Five, a man with whom I hold a great deal of respect... are you suggesting that I might call the match in Moose's favor? *Grinning* I would never do such a thing. To suggest otherwise is ridiculous.

SFJ#5 - Getting back to your match for the Onslaught Title, what do you think of potentially facing another man with whom you shared a membership with The Five, the current Onslaught Champion, LD Williams?

Stank - Should I beat Moreland and Larson and face LD, he should expect nothing less than the best from me. I'm sure he would not want it any other way... and you know what... neither would I. Becoming a Grand Slam champion is my destiny.

SFJ#5 - Some would suggest the Onslaught style doesn't really fit your... M.O.

Stank - The OOWF has talent with a laundry list of varying styles and techniques. I am the longest reigning Intercontinental and World champions in this company. I am a six time World Tag Team champion. You don't hold championships for as long as I have, or as many times as I have, without knowing how to beat ANY given opponent, no matter the match or discipline of that opponent. I will do just fine... you'd be a fool not to believe it.

SFJ#5 - Thank you for your time.

*Stank nods and walks away. As he heads down the Hall of Random encounters he sees a red mark on the floor in front of him. He stops and upon further inspection sees the mark is fresh blood smeared on the floor. Stank grabs the sides of his head and squeezes his eyes shut. When he reopens them the blood has dissappeared. Stank chooses to ignore what he thought he saw and continues down the hall.*

<Fade>

[BookerShark]

<Stank rounds a corner and Moose is standing there, as if he expected Stank all along. Moose doesn't look quite right, he is staring off into space, and once again listening>

MHJ: I haven't forgotten

Stank: Forgotten about what?

<Moose finally seems to snap out of it and looks directly at Stank>

MHJ: We are going to kill those Texas Retards and take the titles

Stank: <grinning> That is what I want to hear. But...........one thing, you can't hold two titles. You beat Evans and.......

MHJ: Don't worry Stank, it will all work out. Evans will be exposed for the fraud he is, then we move onto the "measuring stick" I have a special plan for Cha............oh, Fire is out.

<Stank looks around, expecting to see Fire, but there is no one else in the hall. When he turns back to talk to Moose, Moose is gone, leaving just stank in a long, empty, suddenly overlit hallway>

Stank: Fucking Quinns

[BookerShark]

Moose opens his locker room door and finds it pitch black. He flips the switch and finds his chair empty under the lone light bulb hanging from the ceiling. Out of the shadows steps Chad Madison

Chad: It's about time

Moose: You're right. It's about time I disfigure your pretty boy face.

Chad: If you were going to do that, you wouldn't be standing there.

(Chad puts a foot on the chair and leans on his knee)

Chad: You have something in store for me? More pain? More torture? The thing is Moose, I can take any kind of punishment you can dish out. You Can't Break Me

Moose: I'll wont stop at breaking you. I'll take what you hold dearest, your pride, your dignity, your TITLES

Chad: I suppose my soul too?

Moose: I don't care about your soul. Let Ravenna or Firewoman or your redneck partner worry about that. I will focus on hurting your body

Chad: (smiling) There it is. Moose's fallback. when in down, call me a redneck or a retard

Moose: If the shoe fits...

Chad: Boots you mean? You think I'm going to get all furious about being called names? You think I haven't heard it all before? (batistalaughs) Moose, you aren't even original.
You know, for all your emo angsty ramblings, there really isn't that much to you. You are just a weak beaten down wreck of a human being. You are a coward.

Moose: (stepping forward) Call me that again

Chad: Coward? Did that hurt?

Moose: No, but you will be

(Moose charges Chad and they smash against the back wall. Dust swirls around them as they tussle around the room. Moose shakes Chad off of him and crawls out of sight momentarily. Chad gets to his feet, only to be pulled backwards by Moose, who has wrapped barbred wire around Chad's throat. Moose pulls tigher, the barbs drawing rivers of blood from Chad's neck and his own fingers as he tighens his grip. Chad drops to one knee and Moose begins to laugh maniacally. Chad slumps to the floor and Moose bends over in order to maintain his grip. Chad immediately swings his leg up and catches Moose with enough boot to break the grip. Chad kips up and catches the charging, snarling Moose square in the nose with a superkick. Moose gets to his feet while Chad stands ready. Moose puts his hand to his nose, and when he sees the blood, breaks into an ugly smile)

Moose: So much for Mr. Holier-than-thou Keep-it-in-the-ring

Chad: So much for big bad scary Moose. Can't even beat up an ol' retard anymore. You are done Moose. Bring your 'pain.' Bring your anger. You aren't half the man you claim you used to be.
Eco is still in your head. Alex is in your head. Lisa is still in your head. Evans is in your head. Rebecca is in your head. If I look deep enough, I bet I can find Crete still in your head. And now I am too.
You're descending into madness, a delusional state where your violence will turn inward and you will destroy yourself before anyone else has a chance. And I'll pop some popcorn and enjoy the show.

(Moose laughs again and charges at Chad. Chad side steps him and pushes him into the wall. Moose stops him self and turns around in time to duck a superkick. Moose swings up and gets Chad in the gut, doubling him over. Moose pounces and hurls Chad through the door into the hallway. Moose stalks Chad as he gets to his feet, wrapping barbed wire around his fist. He grabs Chad by the throat and punches him in the eye with the barbed wire fist. Chad bleeds fresh again. Moose draws back for a second blow, but Chad grabs the arm holding his throat and spins Moose around in a Hammerlock, spinning him around and throwing Moose into the ever present storage boxes. Moose crashes through them, drawing arena security's attention and they seperate Chad and Moose as we FADE!~!~~!

[BookerShark]

<Moose staggers down the hall, still bloody, but laughing maniacally at Chad's attack>

MHJ: Another one that thinks he is The One. They all love him, but he attacks ME backstage! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH Oh Chadie Poo They won't like that if you keep THAT up! They will turn on you, and then what? You and that other Texas idiot already proved you suck without Them! HAHAHAHAHAHAH

<Moose rounds another corner after wandering the halls aimlessly and deranged and comes across Ravenna Blue. She looks at him and shakes her head>

RB: Are you EVER not bleeding?

MHJ: Totally worth it

RB: Who this time?

MHJ: Chad

<Rav shoots him a look>

RB: Why Chad?

MHJ: Calm down, HE attacked ME

RB: Oh........wait, why?

MHJ: Guess he doesn't like being called a retard. So what's with you?

RB: Nothing, I have to go train. I have a.........tag match to get ready for.......but I guess you already knew that

MHJ: I told you

RB: Yeah. Well. Sometimes things happen I guess

MHJ: Things happen when you LET them happen. Come on Rav, you know how this works. You have been around. You know why Evans is where he is? Because he didn't LET things happen to him. He went out there and TOOK what he wanted. Now, he is the champion, and you are teaming with Crete

RB: I like Crete

MHJ: That is not the point. It is also repulsive. The point is, They are losing faith in you. They thought you were the One, but you didn't rise to the occasion. You let Evans walk away with YOUR title, and you did nothing about it. That makes Them sad. Now, you are stuck in a go-nowhere tag team with Crete while Evans gets all the glory.

RB: I didn't LET him walk away

MHJ: Really? I don't see you demanding matches. I don't see you getting angry. I don't see you confronting GM the Rick, or Evans, or ANYONE. You got screwed, and you seem content to just take it. Its a shame really. Maybe sometime you need to team with me, LD and Stank, see what it is like to get some REAL anger out in the ring.

RB: Yeah, and I suppose "they" will like that

MHJ: Living for Them is stupid. Live for yourself. If you want to ever want to team up, you know where to find me

<Moose turns and leaves, leaving a frustrated Ravenna standing there>

[BookerShark]

The scene comes up in the back kitchen of the Destroyatorium. We see Dynamite Danny Taylor rushing around stirring pots, adding spices, tasting spoons, and checking temperatures. It is obvious that he is totally focused on his cooking and doesn't hear the sound of DVD entering.

DVD: Well you seem to be in the swing of this big guy.

DDT turns around and smiles nodding at his friend. After another quick stir in one of the pots, Danny makes the motion of writing on his hand.

DVD: Yeah, Spencer dropped ones off with her siblings, and Jack and DH distributed the rest. Don't get disappointed if a lot of em don't show. You know they all don't tend to get along.

DDT just shrugs and continues to cook.

DVD: I do have one more to deliver.

Danny throws him a questioning look.

DVD: Well I figured I would invite the Hawaiians personally.

Danny just smiles and shakes his head as DVD leaves the room. Danny does another quick check of his feast, before pausing and removing two more invites out of his pockets. Danny stares at them for a moment, and a look of resolve passes over his face. Finally he heads out of the kitchen.

The scene cuts to Danny standing outside an unmarked door, he takes a deep breath and knocks. The door opens and we see the massive form of Stank standing within. Stank sees Danny and takes up a defensive posture, a quick scan shows him that Danny is alone, but Stank doesn't seem to drop his guard.

Stank: What do you want chatty?

Danny takes a deep breath before extending his arm and an invitation to Stank. Stank takes it from him without taking his eyes off of Danny's face.

Stank: What is this supp...

Stank is cut off as Taylor spins and leaves. Stank watches him go until Danny is out of sight. Finally Stank looks down at the invite in his hand, and begins to chuckle.

Stank: Heh, and they call me and Moose Crazy.

The scene cuts again, this time to DVD standing outside the door of the Flyin Hawaiians. DVD knocks on the door without hesitation. The door is answered by Kai.

Kai: What's up brudd....Oh it's you. What do you want brah?

DVD: Hey, man, take it easy I come in peace. (DVD's smile widens) Is Noelani around.

Kai: She's busy brah.

DVD: That's fine, truth be told any of you will do for this one. (DVD hands Kai the invite.)

Kai: What's this?

DVD: Damn I knew you had taken some wicked head shots, but I didn't realize it had taken away your ability to read.

Kai (stepping forward) : You think your a funny guy brah?

DVD (stepping backwards) : Hey chill out man, just make sure your teammates read it.

With that DVD leaves as Kai heads back into his dressing room.

The scene shifts again, and Danny Taylor is standing in front of a fan memorial to the fallen Ecosystem. Danny sighs, and places another invite among all the fan letters. He taps slightly on the memorial, before walking away. The camera remains focused on the memorial, and a hand suddenly comes into frame and removes the invite. The camera swings around in the direction the hand came from, but no one can be seen.

Fade

[BookerShark]

*Davin is bringing a bag of trash out to the dumpsters near the loading dock. He is ambushed by someone with a microphone. I'd say she's a random SFJ, but she's not that hot.*

SWAM: Davin! Davin! Did you hear?

DM: Who in the blue fuck are you?

SWAM: Did you hear?!??!

DM: Ah Christ...*throws the bag in the dumpster*...What?

SWAM: Stank called you a "fucktard"!

DM: Ok...

SWAM: ....

DM: ....

SWAM: ....

DM: Is that seriously all you've got?

SWAM: ....

DM: *sigh* Ok, fine. I'm-a cut you a break here, ok? You get the exclusive.

SWAM: ....

DM: Wow, you suck at this. *Davin fires up a cigarette*

SWAM: He called you a-

DM: I know. How about this? Stank, you fat tub of goo, I challenge you, you pussy, to call me that to my face in the ring Wednesday. Then we'll see what happens to you. Ok dipshit? Can you wrap your little monkey brain around that?

SWAM: Monkey brain? Isn't that a little-

DM: Not for me to determine. My God you suck.

SWAM: There was something else.

DM: Ok...

SWAM: ....

DM: ....

SWAM: ....

DM: WHAT THE FUCK WAS IT? I'M BUSY!

SWAM: Oh, uh...he didn't know who Bryce Larson was.

DM: *laughs* Really?

SWAM: ....

DM: Never mind. I'll say this. Bryce and I aren't exactly on the best terms right now, but I WOULD be a "fucktard" if I pretended that Larson isn't one of the best pure wrestlers in the business right now. I'm sure ol' Middle School Gym Bryce will be very interested to hear Stank's non-comments.

SWAM: ....

DM: God. Also, GM the Weak is a fucking moron. Who the hell sets up a 3-way, with the three of US...for an Onslaught Title shot...and doesn't make it an Onslaught match? Moron.

SWAM: Do you think you can beat LD in an Onslaught Match?

DM: Yes.

SWAM: ....

DM: ....

SWAM: ....

*Davin gives Someone With A Microphone a REALLY GOOD DIAMOND CUTTER*

DM: That's better. LD knows what I think about him. I also know what LD thinks about me. We've had instant 5-star classics before, and likely will again in the future. He's not dumb enough to look past me. I mean, he's not Fatty Fatty Fat Fat. First things first though. Win the 3 way, and then become the First 3-Time Onslaught Champion ever. Sounds like a fun time. See you all Wednesday.

*fade*

[BookerShark]

Zane walks in the Texpress dressing area to find a gaggle of SFJ's fawning all over Chad's wounds.

Zane: What happened to you?

Chad: Moose

Zane: You attacked Moose while I wasn't around?

Chad: Not exactly. He attacked me.

Zane: Why?

Chad: I... kinda baited him into it

Zane: Why?

Chad: to let him know we wont be caught off guard by whatever he has planned for us.

Zane: We already have DH, Lexie, Folz & Fulton on out plates..you have to go adding that nutcase to it?

Chad: I didn't add him to it. He was going to be there whether we liked it or not. So I let him know we weren't afraid.... Where were you anyway?

Zane: I took Bridgette to the Black Earth Health Spa. So what''s next?

Chad: Nothing. Let him fester. It's easier to pop a pimple once it's full of puss.

Zane: Ugh. You need to work on your analogies

[BookerShark]

**SFJ#47 catches up with L.D. Williams in the hall of semi-random interviews.**

SFJ#47: “L.D., this week at Midweek Mayhem you will have to face the winner of a match between Stank, Davin Moreland, and Bryce Larson. If you survive that, you will face either Alexander Darling or Sean Moore at the pay-per-view. Are you concerned about having to prepare for such a wide range of opponents?”

LDW: “Nope.”

SFJ#47: “Nope? That’s your only comment?”

LDW: “Yep.”

SFJ#47: “I would have thought you’d have something to say.”

LDW: “I don’t have a lot to say about a lot of things. Take the Onslaught Title, for instance. It seems that evertone who wins this championship talks about how they’re going to restore the honour of the belt, how they’re going to make it mean something again, give it the prestige it’s apparently been missing. Yet, this week, five men - three former world champions and, I feel safe saying, three of the greatest wrestlers to ever step into a ring, and two young guns who will one day join that group - will wrestle, not for the Onslaught Title, but for the opportunity to face me for the championship…Seems ’no comment’ has done well for the Onslaught Title.

Now, as for what happens Wednesday night, I’ve beaten Stank and Davin almost as much as they’ve beaten me, and I’m pretty sure I ended Larson’s career at one point. I’m familiar with the challenges there. Sunday, it’s either Alex or Sean, both of whom have taken their shots at this championship recently. Will I still have the tile Monday morning? I have no idea. What I can guarantee about both of those matches, regardless of who I face, is that they will blow the roof off the arena, they will be the match of the night, and they will be the match everyone is talking about the next day.

Now if you'll excuse me, I need to see a man about having thanksgiving a month and a half late.”

<fade>

[BookerShark]

*Danny Taylor is working in the kitchen of the Destroyitarium when Outback Jack walks in*

OBJ: Smells good in here.

*DDT smiles*

OBJ: Thought about what wine to serve with dinner?

*DDT looks surprised*

OBJ: I'd be tempted to suggest a cabernet/shiraz blend from Australia but it is an American holiday so prehaps a nice pinot noir from the west coast? I know some people like zinfandel with turkey but lately zins tend to be a bit strong on the alcohol, not that that's a dealbreaker for me. Or perhaps a nice merlot?

Paul Giammatti: If anyone orders merlot, I'm leaving.

General Manager The Rick( running in): We can't afford Paul Giammatti!

PG: Don't worry. As long as I don't have to pretend Sandra Oh is attractive, I'll work for free drinks.

[BookerShark]

Alexander and Alexis Darling are SITTING~! in the Darling suites, and it's very quiet. Alexis is watching some video of Sean Moore and is trying to point things out to her brother, who is mostly just staring at the screen.

LD: See, here where he shoots the half, he.....dammit, Alex can you please get your head in the game.

AD: What's today?

LD: Oh.......right....it's Monday....Lucky hasn't heard anything, it's....Alex this is what I was afraid of....you need to focus, you've got a match in two days and your bet with Davin....

AD: Fuck Davin.

The door open and Firewoman walks in.

FW: Hey guys...how was the weekend.

They both rush over to her. Alexander grabs her bag, while Alexis escorts her to a chair, and Lucky, who came in after her, paperwork in hand, heads to the fridge and grabs her a water. He tosses it to her, she catches it, and he takes the bag from Alex, and takes it into their room. Alex gets down to eye level in front of the chair where Fire is sitting.

AD: How was ... are you okay? What....

FW: Guys....can you please......stop hovering. I've had people hovering over me for three days straight.

Alexis backs off, but Alex doesn't. He grabs her hands when he sees bruises and scrapes around her wrists.

AD: What the fuck....?

FW: The first night was a little...um...difficult. I had to be sedated and ... restrained.

AD: Why?

FW: Well....

Fire brushes her hair back while she talks and her forehead is bruised.

AD: What the hell happened here?

FW: Well, I MAY have headbutted an orderly.

AD: May?

FW: Twice.

AD: Twice.

FW: Maybe three times, I don't know, it's not important. But I was better the rest of the time. Just the initial.....brought back some memories....

Fire looks away for a minute, a haunted look comes over her, then she seems to shake it off.

FW: BUT...after that I was a good little patient, did everything I was told, stopped trying to dismember the staff and take my room apart with my bare hands. And here I am.

LD: Uh huh...just like that.

AD: Fire.....did you.....you didn't break out...or sneak out, did you?

FW: What? No way...that's the surest way to find yourself in for a longer vacation. Trust me I know.

AD: So ......

FW: You forget, Alex, despite not being necessarily at her best when in those places, your dear wife has an amazing knack for survival and getting out of situations in which she does not want to be. And those places all run the same way, same rules, same philosophies...once you learn them, you can adapt pretty easily.

LD: You mean...you can work the system.

FW: Whatever you want to call it. Look, I know crazy. It's how I know Outback Jack is faking, and it's how I know what to say and when to say it to make sure I get what I want. By the end of Day 2, I had my lighter back, and my cigarettes and satellite OOWF-TV in my room. By the time my 72 hours was up? I was as good as out. Hell, I could have taken people with me.

LD: *rolling her eyes* That's great. Good to see you got some good therapy time.

Alexis leaves the room shaking her head. Fire smirks as she leaves.

AD: You know, she DOES have a point.

FW: Her hair hides it well.

AD: What about the long term intensive stuff? I mean....

FW: The on duty doctor said I was not a danger to myself or others, so there was no reason to commit me. I can .... I WILL have meetings with Dr. Sid, and see if we can....I dunno, work that way. I did learn a few things that might help in there, it wasn't all just a big game of what can I get away with.

AD: Like...

FW: Well....I'm not good at this, Alex...

AD: I know....

FW: I've been... better, right? And the doctors there think....and I think...I think that a lot of that is due to you, Alex....and us.

AD: Really?

FW: *Fire takes both of his hands into hers and looks him in the eye* The doctors there talked about stability and ... um.... how important it is to have people in your corner...you know, that you can trust....that are always there for you... well, me...make me feel safe....y'know?

AD: And that's....

FW: They don't think it's a coincidence that I started to get better around the time of our wedding...and I think they might be right....

AD: Wow.....but...Dr. Sid thinks it's a phase, and that--

FW: *Fire drops his hands angrily*Well, that's what second opinions are for. *She regains her composure* Besides, they observed me for 72 hours straight, not for an hour at a time. And they agree with YOU, not with the guy who sees me for an hour or so whenever we need him as a plot device. They agree with you, who knows me better than anyone, and that it would be best for me to stay here...with you....if that's okay....

She takes his hand again. A look passes between them, and Alex smiles, and stands up.

AD: Of course it's okay. But ... I mean, we need to get this in writing. You know how Rick is with these things.

FW: Lucky is working on that, and a few other things. It's written in my discharge papers, but ... It was weird, though Alex. All I could think of was... *she tilts her head down but looks up at him with her eyes* ... getting back here to you. You believe me ... don't you?

Another look passes between them, and Alex holds out his hand helping her stand.

AD: Of course I do. I just want to make sure you stick around. You need to help me train my team.

FW: Uh huh....look, first thing you need to do is to quit letting Davin bait you. He was only trying to help.

AD: Uh huh...and the fact that it got you away so you couldn't help with my team was just a happy coincidence?

FW: Alex....

AD: Fine,...so you'll help with the team?

FW: Anything you want.

AD: Really? Anything?

FW: Aw, did you miss me?

AD: No.....okay, yeah....wanna know how much?

FW: Hehe....I would LOVE that...but...I'm REALLY hungry. Can we go to Thanksgiving? Please?

AD: I dunno, I don't think it's ready yet. Besides, I wasn't going to....*Fire gives him a pouty look, which is mostly in jest* Fine...I can't tell you no....you win, let's go....

Fire smiles and gives Alex a big hug.

AD: Okay, okay, don't choke me.

FW: Okay...I have a few things to take care of first, but then I'll meet you there?

AD: Leaving me already...

FW: Never. *Fire starts to leave, then turns back* This is dinner is going to be awesome...you know, this is JUST what Eco would want to see...everyone sitting together....maybe he won't be disappointed when he comes back after all.

Firewoman practically skips out of the room. Alex frowns a bit, but then smiles when he hears her yell "C'mon, slow poke" and follows her out.

[BookerShark]

Firewoman is WALKING~! in the hallway, humming a song, and good gods, she's almost skipping. She sees Matt Folz.

FW: Folz.

MF: Uh...Fire...you're....back?

FW: Yep... I need to borrow something...you mind?

MF: Uh, no....wha--

Fire lets fly with a sucker punch and then a kick to the stomach and a double axe
handle to the back of the head. She rolls Folz over for the pin, and a referee appears
for the count. One..two....THREE!

Winner and NEW DDT Ironperson Heavy Metal Champion....FIREWOMAN!

FW: Thanks, Matt. Be right back.

Firewoman walks down the hall with the belt over her shoulder. she whistles a happy tune, nods and says hi to production assistants, stop and inquires about the health of one PA's children, when she's interrupted by the sounds of adolescent giggling. She sees Chris Evans and Olympic Gold Medalist and America's Sweetheart Shawn Johnson canoodling in the hallway. Aw...

FW: CUbbie....kewpie doll.

OGM&ASSJ: Crazy person.

CE: Shawn, shush...Welcome back, Fire. I guess they thought you weren't that bad after all.

FW: Yeah....guess so.

Fire lunges at Evans and whacks him upside the head with the DDT Ironperson Heavy Metal Championship belt. He drops to the ground.

OGM@ASSJ: HEY! What was that for?

FW: That, my dear, was for indulging in pointless backstage attacks, in violation of
Ecosystem's vision for the OOWF, but specifically for targeting my brother.

Fire punctuates her discussion with additional belts-to-the-head.

FW: Don't let it happen again.

OGM@AS Shawn Johnson rushes to Evans's side....aw. Fire walks back down the hall, happily whistling, until she gets back to where Folz is coming to groggily. She lays
down, pulls his arm over her stomach, and the referee appears again. One...two...THREE!

Your WINNER and NEW DDT Ironman Heavy Metal Champion....MATT FOLZ!

MF: Huh?

FW: Hey, watch your hands...I'm a married woman.

Fire gets up, brushes herself off.

FW: Hm....know where I can get some barbed wire?

Folz mumbles something incoherent.

FW: Never mind....I'll find it myself. Thanks, Matt, you've been a doll. See you at Thanksgiving.

Firewoman continues whistling and walks happily back down the hall. [/quote]

[BookerShark]

(OOC: You could have just ASKED to borrow the belt, )

IC: Folz gets up, shaking his head and almost smiling. Grabbing a package from his dressing room and going down the hallway, knocking on Stan Fulton's door.

SF: Come in.

Folz walks in.

SF: Partner.

MF: Partner. (Handing Fulton the package) Happy Belated Birthday. I don't care if you wear this around me, I actually kinda liked the guy, but I wouldn't recommend wearing this out to our match Wednesday.

Fulton opens the package to reveal an autographed purple number 93 John Randle jersey.

SF: Wow, thanks. Wait, did you say match? I thought we weren't on the card.

MF: We weren't, but I convinced Rick that there'd be a riot out there if we didn't at least make an appearance in front of a crowd that 90% paid to see me.

SF: So who are we facing?

MF: Some...... I'll be nice and call them Enhancement Talent.

SF: Cool, I'll be ready.

MF: Good, one more thing.

Folz hits Fulton with a quick right hook, just hard enough to knock him down but not hard enough to do any real damage.

MF: For the record, I don't drink, I don't have a sister, and I didn't throw up in my kitchen sink.

SF: ah, saw that huh?

MF (Helping Fulton up): I did, we already have one fucking douchebag Moreland ripping on this state for no reason, don't be like him OK?

SF: OK.

A voice from behind: Sorry, am I interrupting something?

MF(Rolling eyes); What do you want assh........Alexander.

Alexander Darling: Can we talk out in the hall for a sec?

MF: yeah yeah, fine, see you later Stan.

AD: So, couldn't help overhearing, still a little sensitive about someone saying something about your state?

MF: Sorry if I'm actually proud of where I come from, and I'm not some spoiled rich kid from Palm Beach.

AD: Moose, you look thinner.

MF: Touche, Did you actually want something or what?

AD: Just wanted to say how impressed I am with you lately. Refunded all the money I gave you, Refunded all the money Stan gave you but still training him. Have stopped all your mercanary work, good job.

MF: That's all well and good, but is there actually going to be a payoff for me here? And what the hell is the actual point of this bet?

AD: Things will be clearer after the pay per view, just have patience.

MF: I'll accept that, for now. Glad to see your wife is doing better.

AD: I didn't think you'd care.

MF: I'm not a complete asshole, and her and I haven't always been enemies. (laughs) Just tell her next time all she had to do was ask to borrow this. (Tapping the DDT title)

AD: Hey, she apparently gave it right back to you, for her, that's progress.

MF: That's true. In all seriousness now, if you don't live up to your word here.......I'd have no problem going to Moose and doing some pro bono work for him.

AD: Relax Matty, I'll live up to my promise, I'll help you reach your full potential. I'm Alexander Darl.......

MF (Cutting him off, rolling eyes) Yeah yeah, we all know the catchphrase. I swear, you're ALMOST as annoying as that retarded fuck in TNA who I unfortunately share a hometown with. I'll see you at Thanksgiving if you're going.

Folz walking away as we FADE.

[BookerShark]

Open in on Ravenna Blue, reading her invitation to the Thanksgiving Dinner.She just stares at it for a while before putting it down and picking up her cell phone. She dials a number and paces nervously as the phone rings.

She sighs heavily and sits down, waiting.

RB: Rachel, this is your sister. Look, it's almost Thanksgiving. I've been thinking a lot about stuff and I miss you and Renee. I miss the kids. Can you just call me or something? I'm sorry about the house, I just want my sisters back. Please...just call me back.

She closes the phone and sits it down on the table next to the Thanksgiving invitation. She picks the invite back up and crumples it in her hand, throwing it across the room. She catches a glimpse of herself in the mirror, her lip swollen and busted and a nice shiner over her left eye. She looks at herself with disgust and pushes the mirror over, toppling it to the ground and shattering into a hundred jagged pieces.

RB: He's right...we're destined to die alone, surrounded by thousands of rabid bloodthirsty fans.

The camera pans in on her leaning down and picking up a jagged piece of broken mirror and looking at herself through it again, blood slowly seeping out between her fingers.

RB: I'm sorry Juni...I'm so sorry.

The camera fades.

[BookerShark]

Sean Naomh Moore, clearly wasted, exits the Destroyatarium with a look in his eye. He turns the corner into the Hall of Not-So-Random Encounters right into Alexander Darling. His speech is utterly slurred. Mixed with his Irish accent, he's only barely understandable.


SNM: Ah, tha's th' pwitee-boy, Alli-hic-san Dollin.


Darling just looks Moore over, unsure of what to make of Moore.


SNM: Ah gon kick yo' ass, Wenny.

AD: What the fuck? Did you drink the entire keg?

SNM: Thas nunya bi'ness. Ah gon kick yo' ass, Dollin.


Moore pokes Darling in the chest, accentuating the "kick your ass," then takes the last gulp from his pint. Darling just shakes his head and pimp-slaps Moore, knocking him to the ground.


AD: I don't think so, son. You've got a ways to go before you're in my league. You see, I'm Alexander Fucking Darling. And you, well, you're just not.


Darling shakes his head again and steps over Moore. Oddly enough, the blow to the head seems to have gotten Moore out of his funk. He stands and turns to Darling.


SNM: Hey, Darling!


Surprised, Alexander Darling turns around to look at Moore. As he turns, Moore smashes his empty glass over Darling's head. As Darling falls, Moore grabs him and CURBSTOMP. Firewoman, wondering what happened, as Alexander was following her, comes around the corner and sees the commotion.


FW: Get off of him!


Firewoman rushes toward Moore and ends up standing between he and Alexander. Moore backs off, as soon as he sees firewoman. Alexander stands up and takes a step toward Moore, but his held back by firewoman. Firewoman's eyes shoot daggers at Moore.


FW: What did I tell you? In the ring.

SNM: Yeah, Darling - hide behind your woman... Well, Wednesday night, you won't be able to hide.

AD: Listen here, punk - Wednesday, in the ring, I'll finish what you started here. Because - like I said - I'm Alexander-

SNM: Blah, blah, blah. Póg mo Thóin.


Security finally arrives and Moore just smiles and leaves.


FADE

[BookerShark]

*Destroyatorium*

The Thanksgiving Dinner is in the early stages as there are still just a few people around. The members of Drink & Destroy are mingling except for DDT who must still be in the kitchen cooking. Ashley and Spencer are at the bar talking with Kai and Aina while DVD and Noelani are chatting elsewhere. Outback Jack and Wally are seemingly in the middle of a belching contest. And in one of the back booths Alexis Darling and DH Magnusson are chatting and getting quite loud. (Remember DH's words are all said with some weird accent)

Alexis: Stop calling him an asshole.

Mags: But if that's what he is...

Alexis: He WAS. And he still can be, but he's changed. You have to see that. Because if you don't see it with him, then you can't see it with me.

Mags: But you're not...

Alexis: I am and I am worse than he ever was. I was the black widow. I was the most manipulative bitch around and if I can change, and you see that, you have to be able to see that he's changing. At least trying to.

Mags: Why is it so important to you?

Alexis: Because this team we have here. It can be something great. I actually feel as if this team is actually a team. That you respect me enough to carry my portion of the work and that you won't just give up the second the going gets tough. That we can work through it.

Mags: We can dollface.

Alexis: We can't if you're going to be like this about Alex all the time. Because no matter what, no matter what happens with anything, Alex and I...we're family. For a long time we were all that each other had and if you ever make me choose.

Mags: I'm not going to make you do that. It's just he's everything I'm not. Everything I ever hated growing up.

Alexis: People change Mags. People grow up. People mature. Even my brother dear has done it.

Mags: I'll think about it, but don't push.

Alexis: Me? Push? Never...

Alexis stands up and motions for someone to come over. Mags sighs before he even turns his head and sees Alexander walking over with Firewoman. Firewoman suddenly stops Alex before whispering something to him. He looks concerned for a second but nods as Firewoman heads back out of the Destroyatorium. Alex makes his way over to the table and kisses his sister on the cheek. He then extends his hand to Magnusson who takes a moment before extending his as well and shaking Alex's hand.

Alexander: Happy Thanksgiving Mags. Thanks for inviting us.

Mags: Wasn't my decision....but I'm glad you and yours came. It should be a nice night.

The three slowly begin to conversate and it seemingly gets easier as we...

*Fade*

[BookerShark]

<Fire leaves the Destroyitarium and is heading down the hall. She stops at Scott Hall’s Last Call Liquor Store and comes out with a bottle of Jameson’s Vintage Reserve. As she is headed back she passes by a stack of crates where Moose is sitting. She doesn’t notice at first until he says something>

MHJ: Fire

<Fire jumps a little, then turns and looks at her brother>

MHJ: Hitting the hooch already?

FW: No, this is for the Thanksgiving…………

MHJ: Don’t worry, I am not welcome there, and I would rather not be there anyway

<Fire looks a little sad at this>

MHJ: So…..it looks like we are finally on opposite sides of things

FW: We don’t have to be

MHJ: Yeah. We do. You need to do what you are doing. I may not agree with it, but if it helps you, then so be it. But you know we are going to cross paths

FW: <looking down> So……….you approve?

MHJ: Look, I didn’t say that. You know I hate Darling more than anyone else on this planet, but if it is what you need to do……….then do it.

<Fire looks around the locker room seemingly lost in a bit of nostalgia for a moment>

FW: Remember when we were kids……before that who…….before mom took me away, we would go to the playground and play King of the Hill with the neighbor kids? You and I would OWN that hill! All the kids from the rich block would come over and think they could take us, knock us off the hill. They never could. They would end up crying and running home because we tore their expensive jackets.

<Fire gets lost in thought for a moment and Moose speaks>

MHJ: Go back to them

FW: Huh?

MHJ: You are one of Them now. Its your decision, and while I may not like it, and it may put us on opposite sides of things, it is what it is and it is your choice to make. So…….go

<Fire turns to walk away and Moose stops her>

MHJ: Oh, don’t think I forgot. Here, happy birthday Lees.

<Moose hands Fire a small box, she opens it and pulls out a little locket. She opens it, and the invisible ninja cameraman catches the picture, it is of two kids, both with crazy red hair, laughing and playing. Clearly it is Moose and Fire as children. Fire catches her breath a little then closes it and sees the inscription on the back Deo faoi cheangal ag fola, atá faoi cheangal ag fola go deo Fire looks up looking for Moose, but he is gone. Fire smiles and carefully puts the locket back into the box, grabs the Jameson and heads to the Destroyitarium>

[BookerShark]

Firewoman tries to put the present in her pocket, but can't. She takes out the barbed wire she had stashed in there and looks at it.

MHJ: Who's that for?

FW: I thought you walked away?

MHJ: I forgot you needed me for this part.

FW: Oh yeah...right...yeah, that was for you.

MHJ: Sweet...Happy Deth Bat needs some new--

FW: No, it was for your neck.

MHJ: Wow, so we had the same thought, then.

FW: Heh....no.....you attacked Chad --

MHJ: He goaded me into--

FW: Which, in addition to being against Eco's rules, I already...well, you know how I feel.

MHJ: Does hubby know? THAT is the question...

FW: That's not the point.

MHJ: I bet Little Alex would think it was an important point. And I don't give a fuck about Eco's rules. I don't want to send you into a delusional spiral of some sort but--

FW: Moose.....if you'd just listen...Before Eco, I heard the voices too....all of them....even Him....but then three was just Eco. And now there's...

MHJ: No one. I remember.

FW: So if you just....stop listening to him. And start listening to --

MHJ: Save your prophecy. It's lost on me.

Fire looks down at the locket and sighs.

MHJ: You know he's still there....and would take you back. In fact...he wants you to come back.

FW: That's not going to happen, Moose.

MHJ: We'll see....so....you gonna use that?

Moose points to the barbed wire. Fire looks at it, at the box with the locket in it, and back again.

FW: Fine...you get a pass.....JUST THIS ONCE.

Moose smirks and disappears into the shadows...or whatever. Fire smiles and turns back toward the Destroyitarium. She puts the barbed wire back in her pocket, and then takes the locket out and tries to put it on. She can't quite get it and is struggling when a pair of hands reaches in and latches it for her.

FW: Hey, thanks.

Fire turns and is surprised to see Chad Madison. They share a smile.

CM: You're welcome ma'am. Those are some mighty fine boots you're wearing.

FW: Oh yeah...those were for you....

CM: Uh....

FW: Super kick....for attacking Moose.

CM: HE attacked ME.

FW: After you egged him on...

Chad stands back getting defensive. Fire looks like she's considering it, and then sighs.

FW: You know, I'm just not in the mood. Just....don't do it again, okay? I'm hungry...you going for Thanksgiving?

CM: Yes, ma'am.

Chad extends his elbow. Fire looks and then shakes her head.

FW: Yeah...um....don't want your latest date to get jealous.

CM: Probably right. Well let's go so we can get to the buffet before Crusher and Stank.

They laugh and head toward the Destroyitarium.

[BookerShark]

<Moose heads down the hallway of random holiday miracles and finds a lost pizza man looking increasingly impatient. The young man walks up to him and seems relieved at first to see another human, but the closer he gets to Moose, the less confident he seems about his decision. >

LPM: Hey man, I'm looking for a um... checks his receipt Rebecca Bachman. Do you know where she is?

<Moose just looks at him >

LPM: Look, I just wanna deliver her pizza and booze and get out of here. Can you help me or not?

<Moose holds out his hands and stares at the guy. A long moment passes and the guy hands over the pizza and the grocery bag on top of it.>

MHJ: Hat too.

LPM: What the hell, and what about my tip?

MHJ: I'll give you one hell of a tip, you don't give me the hat and I'll be fitting you for a barbed-wire tie.

<The guy takes off his Pizza House tm hat and hands it to Moose and promptly runs off, leaving Moose laughing. He puts the hat on his head and heads off to the random closet-sized dressing room she has been using.

He approaches, seeing the door is slightly ajar and opens in, knocking on it lightly. Ravenna is sitting in the corner of the room, looking at the broken mirror on the ground. She notices the pizza man, but doesn't take her eyes off the glass.>

RB: Just sit it on the floor. Your tip is on my duffel bag.

<Moose just stands there a minute, waiting for her to look up, which she does eventually.>

RB: It's right there....Moose?

MHJ: I have a pizza and booze for a checks the receipt Rebecca Bachman. Is that you?

RB: Yes. Wait, you didn't kill the delivery guy, did you?

MHJ: <laughing> No. Are you seriously having pizza and beer for Thanksgiving dinner?

RB: No, I'm having pizza and whiskey. Just gimme the stuff and leave me alone.

MHJ: Weren't you invited to the huge dinner?

RB: Yes. But I'm not going. I should, but I just...don't feel up to it...

<Moose stands there for a moment longer, Ravenna looks up and sighs>

RB: What Moose? I am tired. I am not in the mood for games. I just want to drink and eat some pizza, and maybe forget for awhile

<Moose looks around the room and spots two glasses, he grabs them and pours a drink for each of them. He hands one to Rav and she downs it, Moose pours another and sits down across the room in a VERY beat up overstuffed chair. Before anyone says anything Crete walks into the room>

CTG: Citizen Blue, I ……….. MOOSE!

<Moose just smirks and looks at Crete>

MHJ: Hiya Crete!

<Crete looks at Rav, then back to Moose>

CTG: Citizen Blue……

RB: It’s Ravenna Crete, my name is Ravenna

CTG:……..Ravenna, I have to question the wisdom of this…….of HIM…….

RB: <tired> It’s fine Crete, what did you want?

CTG: Well……I came here to see if you would be joining us at the Thanksgiving feast

RB: <sighing> No……No I am not, I am not feeling up to it

CTG: But Citi……..Ravenna, I fear that with………Him here………

<Ravenna just shakes her head and takes a drink and flips the box of pizza open, Moose gets to his feet and backs Crete to the door>

MHJ: You heard her <mockingly> Citizen Crete the lady is not interested in your company

<Crete straightens himself in the hallway and gets in Moose’s face>

CTG: I know you Moose. I know you better than ANYONE else here. I am not sure what you are trying to pull, but Ravenna is a good person, she will not fall for your evil influence

<Moose looks over his shoulder and sees Rav pound another drink then turns back to Crete>

MHJ: Really Crete? Maybe its not MY influence that she needs saving from. Now…..why don’t you run off and play with Them some more. I am sure you all have plenty to talk about, make sure you give the fans my love

<Moose slams the door in Crete’s face, laughing maniacally the whole time. Crete gets a look of rage on his face and storms off in the direction of the Destroyitarium>

[BookerShark]

Sean Naomh Moore arrives back at the Destroyatarium carrying a rather large platter. Oddly enough, Moore is not wearing his trademark mask to the occasion - rather a nice charcoal suit with a green and silver pinstripe tie. Accompanying him for the feast is SoCalChristy, wearing an elegant violet dress.


SNM: Danny, my boy! Where do you want this?


Dynamite Danny Taylor looks questioningly at Moore and the platter. He makes his way over and lifts the foil covering a full platter of about two dozen oddly-shaped looking things. DDT points at them and gives Moore the palms up "What the hell is this?" expression. Outback Jack walks over to see what's going on.


SCC: It's one of my favorite recipes from my great-grandfather's restaurant back in Glasgow - it's called Spicy McHaggis.

OBJ: Haggis? What is haggis?

SNM: Sheep's stomach, stuffed with meat and barley.

OBJ: And what do you do with it?

SCC: You eat it!

OBJ: :BEEELLLLCH: That's Scottish for how revolting... Oh, and nice dress.

SCC: Uh thanks...


DDT smiles, shrugs, and points to an open spot at the buffet table. Moore sets the platter there and goes back to where Christy and OBJ are having a casual conversation.


SNM: So, Jack - I hear there's wine for this event - not my usual, but I'll get in the spirit of things. [

[BookerShark]

FADE up on the not very brightly lit locker room of The Crusher Stan Fulton, who we find is sitting by himself, holding his recent birthday present. A knock on the door is heard.

SF: "It's open."

The door opens and in walks Matt Folz.

MF: "How's it goin', partner?"

SF: "OK, Matt. Thanks again for the John Randle jersey. He always was one of my favorites. Though his recent lottery commercials make me wonder if he took too many shots to the head."

MF: "So you coming to the Thanksgiving dinner?"

SF: "I don't think so. I'm not much of a "friendly gathering" type person. Too moody and morose. Besides, if I drive like a mo-fo, I might be able to make it back to my parents' place if I leave right after Mayhem tomorrow night. So a quick squash match would be nice."

MF: "No promises. Rick is still finalizing the details."

SF: "Cool. Well, have fun and all. I'm sure you and Alex will be all scheme-y together all night."

MF: "I can't get him to give me a straight answer. Kind of frustrating."

SF: "It'll happen. Who else is he going to chose over you? No one. So sit back and let it happen."

MF: "When did you get all philosophical?"

SF: "Don't know. Mongo only pawn in game of life."

MF: "Geez. You're a freakin' nerd, you know that?"

SF: "You are part of the Rebel Alliance and a traitor! Take her away!"

MF: "Her who?"

SF: "He turned around fast and he saw a small Who. Little Cindy Lou Who, who was no more than two."

MF: "Now I know why you're not welcome at parties."

SF: "You're right, Bob. I'm sorry. What can I say? I-I'm a miserable worthless hunk of slime. Here, I want you to take this crowbar and... just bash my head right in! Go ahead. Really. Please! Just BASH it right in! "

MF: ". . ."

SF: ". . ."

MF: "So anyway, we've got one day of training left before tomorrow night. See you at 6AM."

SF: "You got it boss."

Folz shakes his head and leaves. Fulton goes back to sitting quietly in the near dark.

SF: "It appears my hypocrisy knows no bounds."

FADE

[BookerShark]

Concrete TG storms into the Destroyitarium, eyes blazing. Sean Naomh Moore, DDT and Outback Jack look up.

CTG: Citizens! I have need of--

<PZZZZZZZZZT>

We cut away to...What the fuck? Super Mario? BRICK~!? And George H.W. Bush?


thumb1.shutterstock.com.edgesuite.net/display_pic_with_logo/437/437,1243958643,1/stock-vector-making-a-wall-of-bricks-vector-31337416.jpg [/img]


Super Mario: Ladies and gentlemen, have you felt left behind by the OOWF? Between the blood, the cursing, the actually-killing-people, have you felt like you can no longer watch this show with your children?

George H.W. Bush: My fellow Americans, it is time for a change. It is time for a family-friendly alternative that promotes traditional American values. And some rip-roaring humor to boot!

BRICK~!: Without competition, the OOWF has become a predictably sadistic soap opera. We seek to restore the values of the 1980's--when wrestling moves couldn't hurt a fly and gimmicks were totally incoherent.

Super Mario: You may have forgotten our name, but you'll remember us soon....

<PZZZZZZZZZZZT>

We're back in the arena where we see Davin Moreland WALKING~! until he is BRUTALLY ATTACKED BY A SHOT FROM A FOAM NOODLE!

Moreland: Huh? (He turns around to see Super Mario holding the noodle) What are you doing--

Suddenly, George H.W. Bush drives up in a Milk Truck and begins shooting his hose at Davin Moreland!

Moreland: What the...warm milk...sleepy....

Davin Moreland quietly goes to sleep on the floor. BRICK~! approaches with a silly string can, with which he, on the back of Davin, spells out the letters...
PHWF

[BookerShark]

Kayfabe wanders into the Destroyatarium and sees a groups of people and a Thanksgiving Buffet. She checks her trusty calendar, verifies that she hasn't, in fact, missed Midweek Mayhem. She verifies that it's not yet Thursday, looks up, looks back at her calendar, looks back up - shrugs and grabs a plate and gets in line.