OOWF November Pain 3 PPV
Live! From Blue Earth, MN
BRYCE LARSON vs. J-P SPARXXBryce Larson is announced and makes his way to the ring first. He steps between the ropes and gets a mixed reaction from the crowd, then waits in the corner for his opponent. J-P Sparxx is announced and comes out with Jewel. He gets a surprising ovation from the fans, and looks a little surprised by it. They make their way to the ring and Jewel holds the ropes open for Sparxx, he steps in, and she takes his jacket. Sparxx moves to the middle of the ring and looks Larson up and down, then shakes his head and dismisses him and heads to the corner. The referee calls for the bell and we are ready to go.
Larson charges across the ring as Sparxx comes out of the corner and SPEARS him to the mat! Larson keeps Sparxx on the mat and HAMMERS him with punches to the side of the head. Jewel yells for the referee to break it up and he finally pulls Larson off of Sparxx. Sparxx gets to his feet and Larson charges in and catches him with a clothesline upside the head that sends Sparxx staggering into the corner. Larson runs in and catches him with a knee to the face, then grabs him and tries a bulldog out of the corner, but Sparxx puts on the brakes and Larson sails through the air and slams into the mat. Bryce gets to his feet and falls into the corner, Sparxx charges in and tries something, but Larson moves out of the way and Sparxx crotches himself on the second turnbuckle. Larson grabs him from behind and drives him to the mat with the TOWER OF LONDON! Larson covers, but Sparxx kicks out at two.
Larson pulls Sparxx to the middle of the ring and rocks him with a European uppercut, then whips him to the ropes and catches him on the rebound with a straight punch to the jaw that drops Sparxx to the mat. J-P rolls out of the ring to the floor, Jewel comes over and helps him get his bearing again, inside the ring Larson yells for Sparxx to get back into the ring and face him. Sparxx climbs onto the apron and Larson tries to grab him for a suplex, but Sparxx avoids his grip and nails him with a shoulder to the gut, then springs over the top rope, rolls forward in the ring and bounds off the opposite ropes and catches Larson with a 619! Larson snaps back to the middle of the ring and Sparxx covers him, but Larson kicks out at two.
Sparxx pulls Larson up and scoops him up and plants him on the mat, then bounds off the ropes and drops a leg across his chest. Sparxx gets to his feet and waits for Larson to get up, then connects with a drop kick to the jaw that sends Larson back to the corner. Sparxx charges in and tries a monkey flip, but Larson lands on his feet and heads to the ropes. On the rebound, Sparxx comes out of the corner and tries a super kick, but Larson ducks it, puts on the brakes, and when Sparxx turns around, Larson POPS him with one of his own! Sparxx crumples to the mat, Larson pulls him to his feet, kicks him in the gut, lifts him and hits a PILEDRIVER! Sparxx is OUT! Larson covers him, hooking the leg hard, but Sparxx manages to roll his shoulder just before the three count, much to the delight of the crowd.
Larson gets to his feet first and waits for Sparxx to get up, as he does, he grabs him and hits DRAGON’S FIRE! Larson covers again, but somehow, Sparxx gets his foot on the bottom rope. Larson is not fazed by this at all, he pulls Sparxx up and sets him on the top rope and climbs up himself, looks like he is going for the TRANSPORTER! But Sparxx holds on and Larson can’t finish the move. The two of them battle it out on the turnbuckle, trading chops and punches. Finally Sparxx grabs Larson and lifts him for a suplex, then drops him stomach first to the mat! Larson flops over grabbing his ribs in pain, Sparxx climbs to the top rope and hits DA BOMB! Sparxx pulls Larson up, scoops him up and DRIVES him to the mat with the GEM DROP! Sparxx covers, one, two, THREE!
WINNER in 12:11 – J-P Sparxx
*The lights in the arena go out completely and there's a murmuring in the crowd, who, to be fair, don't know what the hell is going on. Suddenly the opening notes of "Extreme Ways" start playing throughout the arena. The lights on the Jumbotron come on throughout the introduction. The words "Davin Moreland" appear in green on the screen. The drums kick in, and the Jumbotron itself shows video clips of Davin Moreland winning what appears to be every championship that he's won in the OOWF since he was hired. Eventually, Davin appears on the ramp himself, rocking one of the gray Italian suits we've become accustomed to seeing. Samantha is on his arm, wearing this sick little red number that the 12-year old boys in the front row are all drooling over. They get what reaction they get, probably 2/3 to 1/3 cheers vs. boos. A quick wave from both of them, and they make their way down to the ring, slowly. No pandering here, looks like things are all business.
Davin holds the ropes for his wife, then climbs in after her. He wanders over to the other side of the ring, and grabs the two conveniently placed microphones. He hands one to Samantha and clears his throat before speaking.*DM: Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. Tonight you are all about to witness wrestling history, as we are about to embark on something that not only hasn't been DONE before, but hasn't been TRIED before. Consider yourselves lucky, as you are the first ones to witness it all. First off, I'd like to call to the ring my personal interviewer for the past three years, Miss Moonbeam O'Callahan. Moony?
*"Extreme Ways" fires up again, and Moonbeam apparently has her own Jumbotron now; same style: Name in green first, and this time there are random clips of Moonbeam, mostly interviewing, a couple brief scenes from "Moose and Mouse" as well. Dressed in a very classy blue dress (as opposed to her normal ratty jeans and open flannel with a t-shirt with a pot leaf on it) she makes her way down to the ring to an even bigger ovation than the couple in the ring. Davin holds the ropes for her as well, and she climbs in, making her way next to Samantha. Being a good SFJ, she brought her own personal microphone for the occasion.*DM: Moony, thank you for coming out. First off, I'd just like to thank you for not only your service, but your loyalty over the years. This isn't a business where trust is easy to come by, and I'm simply thankful that we crossed paths when we did. You're invaluable to me, and to Samantha, and to us, you are family. I'm sure you're excited for this evening as well.
SFJ420: Thank you for all your kind words, Davin. Like, you and Samantha are totally my family, man, and there's nothing I wouldn't like, do, for either one of you dudes. And yeah, I'm like totally stoked about tonight. I'm ready for my new, like, role, man. Can't wait.
DM: Thank you, Moony. Before I get into the meat of our big night, I'd like to introduce one more member of our team, who has been around us since the Run DEA days *cheap pop*, and has more recently become a surrogate daughter to my Mom, and later a valuable interviewer and advisor to me as well. Ladies and gentlemen, America's Sweetheart....Shawn Johnson.
*"Extreme Ways" again fires up, and Shawn Johnson gets her own Jumbotron now too. After her name in green comes up, we see reaction clips of Shawn, winning medal after medal, from her youth all the way until the Beijing Olympics. We also see her winning Dancing with the Stars. She makes her way down, wearing an identical style and color dress. Huge pop from the crowd as Davin holds the ropes open for her as well. Being at least a part-time SFJ, she has HER own microphone. Convenient.DM: Shawn, before I go on, I'd just like to say that it was a long time ago now when we met, and obviously, although it seems long ago, we didn't always get along.
*Shawn nods with a smile.*
DM: But as time has gone on, be it your match with Selena Gomez, be it earning your Run DEA *cheap pop* jacket I had the honor of awarding you, the time you spent with my Mom and the other girls, and more recently, the invaluable insight you've offered to me as an advisor and a great champion. I thank you for your service and loyalty to myself and Samantha. We're so proud of you and lucky to have you with us.
OGMSJ: Thank you Davin. Also thanks to Samantha and Moony. I'm more comfortable in this business now than I ever was, and have learned from my previous mistakes. I'm happy to offer any insight or help that I can to any of you, and I'm proud to call you all family. And tonight? It's gonna be big.
SDM: You're damn right. Davin?
DM: Right. Well, let's cut right to the chase, shall we? Several weeks ago, my brother-in-law, Alexander Darling *pop* crossed some lines, in my mind, that he shouldn't have crossed. As much as my instincts told me otherwise, I did not resort to violence. In fact, he had a novel idea. In order to put an end to our endless bickering, he proposed that we each select a team of three wrestlers who have yet to win a World Heavyweight Championship. Based on a vote of our peers, the person who is able to assemble and lead the better team, will win. Fans will not have a direct vote, but there will be fan polls along the way which will assist our peers as to whom should win. Perhaps it's a simplistic idea, and perhaps it's too complex. But let's be honest, it beats the hell out of limitless backstage attacks and matches which will never, ever, have a conclusion.
SDM: That's right Davin. As my husband said a couple of weeks ago, we assembled our team within 24 hours of the bet's inception. As of now, it's unclear as to whether or not my brother has even assembled a complete team, which, in my opinion, is pretty telling. As Davin and I sorted through the selection process, as brief as it was, we were bound and determined to find, simply, the best available talent on the roster. Davin's pedigree is virtually unmatched in this company, so finding willing participants was relatively easy. The fact that few people can stand to be in the same room with my brother was also a nice recruiting tool. So here we are, tonight, selection night, and Davin will begin to add yet another chapter to his already impressive legacy. With the help of three of the finest talents available in the company, all of whom should be future World Champions, this team will be unstoppable, unbeatable, and unmatched. It won't even be close, and my brother may want to consider a graceful forfeit before he is embarrassed in front of everyone.
DM: Now honey. That won't happen. He's far too stubborn and prideful for that.
SDM: And he's kind of, well, what's the nice way of putting it these days?
OGMSJ: Retar-
SDM: No no hon. The nice way.
SFJ420: Slow?
SDM: Yes, that's the one. Not like tragically slow, but just a little slow on the uptake, if you will.
DM: Listen, I don't claim to know your brother as well as you do, but let's not underestimate him. That's not what we do here. We prepare for everything and everybody the same way...the right way. So regardless of the sheer awesomeness of our assembled team, we need to remember that his team is getting paid too.
SDM: *slightly sarcastic* Of course, dear. You're right. Shall we introduce the first member of our team?
DM: A fine idea. Our first team member is a former Onslaught and Intercontinental Champion here in OOWF, and will be our longest-tenured wrestler. As a matter of fact, he pre-dates the Darlings joining OOWF. He and I haven't always gotten along. Maybe some of it has to do with the fact that I own zero singles wins against him. When deciding on my selections, I figured if I can't beat him, it will be tough for anyone else to. At 6'1", weighing in at 213 lbs, hailing from Oakland, California, please give a warm welcome to...The Dead!
*"Extreme Ways" hits again, and The Dead appears in green letters on the Jumbotron. The video is of reaction shots from Dead's title wins and defenses. The Dead appears at the top of the ramp, for the first time in OOWF, he's wearing an expensive-looking suit. Clutching his own microphone, he makes his way into the ring to a mostly positive response.*DM: Deadly, thank you for joining us.
TD: My pleasure, Davin. I wasn't completely surprised when you called me, but I'm happy to be part of the team...the winning team.
DM: Thank you, Dead. Your skills and experience will be invaluable to us going forward, and I hope that this will be a launching pad for you. The OOWF fans already are familiar with you, but now they'll have a chance to see you completely focused and committed. They're going to see what you can do. Not only will they be watching, but the Board of Directors will be as well.
TD: That's what I'm counting on, Davin.
DM: Good. Ladies and gentlemen, a warm greeting for...The Dead!
*surprisingly, Dead gets a nice ovation here*
DM: Dead's joining up alone should make us the favorites. But when I was thinking of our second member, I decided to select someone who, like Dead, could stand a change of scenery, and a change of direction. Toiling in some average stables for some time, this competitor displayed perseverance and ambition. He rose above those who tried desperately to drag him down into the muck of average, and has become one of the more successful champions in our business today. He is a multiple-time Champion in virtually every division save for the World Heavyweight, and is known throughout the company as one of the best pure wrestlers in the company. He stands an even 6' tall and weighs in at 230 lbs. He hails from Toronto, Ontario, Canada by way of Long Island, New York. He may have the heart of a lion, but has outgrown the nickname "Lionheart"...he is your current OOWF Intercontinental Champion...Chris Evans!
*You know the drill. "Extreme Ways" followed by Chris Evans in green on the Jumbotron, the video is of Evans winning or retaining title. He's also dressed high-class and professionally, holding a mic. He gets a monster face pop, although there are some confused murmurs as to why Evans would join this crew. He climbs in, and makes a beeline for Shawn Johnson, giving her the kind of kiss that would get the "WOOOOOOOOOOOOO" reaction on a laugh track. I guess that cements that. He shakes hands with Dead before finding a spot next to Shawn.*DM: Chris, thank you for joining us.
CE: My pleasure, Davin. When you called, I knew it was the right move for me and for my career. Despite being a champion, I just felt I was spinning my wheels running in the circles I was in. On a strong team such as this one, being assisted and guided by yourself and Samantha, it was an easy choice. Knowing that Shawn was on board, well, that just made my choice even easier.
Shawn cutely blushes a little and leans against him, as Chris puts his arm around her.
DM: Chris, you're already a champion. But now, you're going to be a fighter, a warrior, and prove to everyone that you're worthy of the big belt. No moral dilemmas. No more talking about your fucking feelings with people who aren't worthy of your time. Just winning. And lots of it.
CE: That's what I'm signing up for, D.
DM: Ladies and Gentlemen, please recognize with your applause...Chris Evans.
*a similar pop to what he got on his entrance. Maybe a little less because he said something marginally mean, and marks are stupid.*
DM: And last but certainly not least, the final member of our team was a marginally tougher selection, simply because of his relative inexperience. But I knew, from the moment he set foot in OOWF, that he had "it". He's not here to kiss anyone's asses, he's just here to show to everyone how good he is.
SDM: He also holds an impressive record against one Alexander Darling.
DM: That he does. He hasn't won a championship with us...yet. But he will. Soon. He's too good not too. He's in your face and doesn't care what you think of him personally, but you WILL respect his wrestling abilities. That's confidence, friends, and he's got plenty of it. His energy, talent and focus will serve us all very well going forward. He stands 6'1" and weighs in at 225 lbs. He hails from Charleston, South Carolina...in the heart of the Dirty, Dirty...he is...J-P Sparxx!
*I think you've figured out what comes next by now. "Extreme Ways". Green letters on the Jumbotron. This time there are clips of Sparxx beating Alexander Darling, which is pretty funny. He appears at the top of the ramp, not in his usual white-trash chic, but in a very classy suit. Jewel is by his side, dressed to kill, also in a blue dress. It's about a 50/50 split on the reaction as they make their way into the ring. Jewel hands the microphone she was carrying to Sparxx.* DM: J-P, thank you for joining us.
JPS: Yo D, check it. I came to OOWF to fight the best, and beat the best, knowhatimsayin? But part of the reason I got the house on lock here was cause I studied you, homey. I watched you from the time you be talkin to poles and shit up in here. Then you started winning. And winning. Then you hit the top and you don't STOP, yo. So when I gotcha call, it didn't take but a hot minute to decide. I be wantin to work witchu from jump, knowhatimsayin? Glad I'm on the team, yo. Much respeck.
DM: Much respect to you as well, my friend. You're on a team with Champions. Watch them. Follow them. They will show you how to prepare, how to carry yourself, and most importantly, how to be a champion here in OOWF. You also should know that there is no hierarchy between the three of you. In my eyes, you're equals, despite your past accomplishments. In my mind, you're on THIS team, and to be on THIS team, you need to have MY respect and trust. To me, that's more important than any championship.
SDM: In our minds. None of you are greater than the other, and that's important if we're going to mesh together as a team. I want us to be the Patriots, not the Heat. Is that clear?
JPS: Yes ma'am.
CE: No problem, Sam.
TD: If that's how it is, then that's how it is. I want to win. If that's the best way, then that's my way.
DM: Another thing I want to make crystal clear. We are NOT in a stable war with Alexander Darling. Your job is simple. Win. Win matches. You guys are here to impress our peers. You might wrestle Darling's guys. You might wrestle each other. It doesn't matter. If you wrestle each other, your goal is to win. It doesn't matter who's across the ring.
TD: Wouldn't have it any other way.
JPS: Dats how I wanna roll, son.
CE: I think I can manage that.
SDM: However, when you're not in the ring, you've got each other's backs. That's part of being a team, right?
CE: No problem.
TD: I've never been much of a stable guy or a team guy, but if it helps us win, I'm for it.
JPS: I'm down. Tell me when and where, yo.
DM: One last thing. Do NOT go after Alexander Darling or any member of his team unless you're accosted first. Backstage bullshit will only be a distraction to our ultimate goal. Let me handle Darling. That's what I'm here for. I'll do the bullshit, you guys win. Simple, right?
TD: I like the sound of that.
CE: Sign me up.
JPS: J-P wins. Let’s do dis.
DM: So we're all in agreement. Good. Finally, to the fans gathered here tonight, I need to fill you in on our name. This was a personal indulgence of mine...
SDM: And mine...
DM: Alexander Darling has tried to push my buttons from the second he set foot here in OOWF. Hell, he tried to kill me in the hospital his first week here for crissakes. We've been stablemates, we've been enemies, we've been tag partners, we've been family...but we've never...and will never...be friends. This latest attempt to insert himself into my business was the last fucking straw. So not only did I take the bet, not only will I WIN the bet, but I will destroy that piece of shit in the process. So get all your talking in now, jackass, and let our team name be a constant reminder of how we feel and think about you. Any time you put our names in your mouth, consider this your response...
SDM: Go Fuck Yourself, little brother. GFY will put an end to your bullshit once and for all.
DM: Ladies and gentlemen? I present to you, GFY!
*crowd pop as "Extreme Ways" fires up again. They all shake hands with each other in the ring, and head back up as a single unit<Before Davin and his group’s music gets going it is abruptly cut off by Metallica’s “Unforgiven.” The lights dim at first and then a blue spotlight hits the ramp and Alexander Darling steps out first. He’s quickly followed out by Matt Folz, Bryce Larson, and DH Magnusson before Alexis Darling comes out last. The crowd is mixed in response to this group just as they were to Davin’s group. After a few moments the crowd finally dies down and Alexis hands a microphone to her brother.>
Alexander: I’m not going to waste anyone’s time who spent their hard earned money to come to a wrestling PPV but agreements were made to announce our teams tonight. The group standing with me does not need the pomp and circumstance that Davin here loves so much. So let’s keep it simple…standing with me are multiple time champions across the board. Onslaught, Intercontinental, and Tag Team titles have been held by these men. Matt Folz has taken 2 of the last 3 world champions to the limit and come within a hair’s breadth of holding that title. Bryce Larson is a superstar in the making. Titles held all over the world. And DH Magnusson has proven time and time again that he cannot be put down for good. He has more fight than everyone in that ring combined.
These men here are going to not just be allies inside the ring, they’re going to be a team outside the ring. They’re going to train together. They’re going to look out for one another. And the bottom line is we’re all going to make each other better. And we’re not going to apologize for taking what’s ours going forward. We’re not going to be sorry for those that get left behind. I’d like the world to meet Matt Folz, DH Magnusson, and Bryce Larson. I want the world to meet…”UNFORGIVEN.”The music hits once again as Alex, Matt, DH, Bryce, and Alexis walk to the back.
RAVENNA BLUE & CONCRETE TG vs. DEAD TVRavenna Blue and “Concrete” Takaken Gryfon are out through the curtain first, Gryfon throwing up his fist as the audience cheers. Ravenna watches him and the fans closely, as she gently slaps a couple of the fifty hands reaching out to her. The two enter the ring and begin bounding off the ropes in preparation for their tag match.. Magnusson and Alexis are out next through the curtain, walking very deliberately, focused on the ring and competitors in front of them. They step up to the ring simultaneously, cross between the ropes, and go nose to nose. The referee steps in, and DH Magnusson and Ravenna Blue elect to begin.
Rav and DH lock up to start, DH pushing Ravenna into the corner, but Ravenna pushing off the bottom rope to spin DH hard against the corner, which he slowly pushes out off. DH shoves Ravenna off, grunting at her. Ravenna stops for a second, and then slaps DH across the face, surprising him and the fans. She pops up with a kick straight to the side of his head, knocking him over on his back. Ravenna flips for an abbreviated rolling thunder, landing hard and scooping DH’s leg for two. Ravenna hits DH with a hard shot to the ribs, but DH scoops her leg out from under her and pulls her into a leg lock, yanked up into a half Boston crab. Ravenna reaches out to the ropes, but DH pulls her away, reaching out to get the tag to Alexis.
Alexis hops over the ropes while DH holds Ravenna tight in the hold, and drops her leg on the back of Ravenna’s neck. Alexis rolls her over into a cover, but Ravenna pushes her off hard at two. Alexis grabs Ravenna around the neck and wraps on a chinlock, attempting to swoop her legs around for a leg lock around the waist. Ravenna rolls to prevent the leg lock, however, moving to a standing position. She swings forward and snapmares Alexis to the mat, following with a swift kick to the back. Alexis cries out as Ravenna yanks Alexis’s arms behind her and runs her into the turnbuckles, trying to roll her back into a pinning combination, but Alexis holds on, mule kicking Ravenna from behind. Alexis then hops up to the top rope and comes off with a moonsault, catching Ravenna perfectly as she stands up, but Ravenna rolls through into a pinning combinaton, with Alexis kicking out at two. Ravenna then leaps over to her corner, tagging CTG in.
“Concrete” Takaken Gryfon comes in next as a house of fire, charging at Alexis, who dodges, causing Gryfon to slam into Magnusson, knocking him off the apron. Alexis hops up and tries to catch Gryfon with a neckbreaker, but Gryfon hold on and keeps spinning, pulling Alexis up into a standing vertical suplex, crashing to the ground. Alexis pops up dizzy and does catch Gryfon with an erratic backfist, but her second spinning one caught by Gryfon, who reverses into some kind of double spin torture rack—no! Over the head Angle Slam variant! That was pretty cool! Gryfon bridges before DH can make the save: 1—2—3!
Winners in 9:22….”Concrete” Takaken Gryfon and Ravenna Blue!
Gryfon celebrates the victory and extends a hand to Ravenna. She takes it and acknowledges the cheers, before swiftly heading to the back, Gryfon quickly following. Alexis seems frustrated as Magnusson shakes his head.
STANK vs. ERIC O’MACStank comes through the curtain first, with his face conveying displeasure. A fan in the front is carrying a sign that says “STANK HEARS VOICES.” Stank grabs the sign and tears it in two to the fan’s hooting and hollering, throwing in down before storming into the ring to await his opponent. Eric O’Mac comes through the curtain next, proudly carrying his PHWF Quadruple Crown Championship. He is also carrying a “Wheaties: Breakfast of Champions” box with his face taped on it. He stops at the sign, pulls out some tape from his box, tapes the sign together and signs it ‘Eric O’Mac” before entering the ring, to cheers and appreciation. The bell rings, and this match is ON~!
Eric O’Mac opens with a test of strength. Stank, confused, grabs the right hand first—and Eric kicks Stank in the shin. Stank stumbles for a second, and Eric takes a step back and shoulder blocks the big man down. Eric, impressed by his own strength, takes the opportunity to run around the ring as though he has won the Super Bowl. He goes outside to ask the fans “Did you see that?” and flexes for them as Stank rolls out of the ring and clobbers Eric across the back of the head. Stank picks Eric up by the left arm, whips him into the turnbuckle post. Eric knocks against it face-first, grabbing his chin on the floor. Stank pulls his arm behind him, stomping his head down into the ground. Stank rolls Eric back in the ring slowly, but as he climbs up, Eric keeps rolling…right out the other side. Stank walks over to the outside of the ring, but Eric has already ducked under the mat. Stank gives chase under the ring, but we see Eric dodge back onto the apron, prompting the ref to begin a countout. However, he only gets to five by the time Stank is back in the ring, looking pissed.
Stank with the right hand to Eric, and another, and another, and a big uppercut to take the showman off his feet. Stank bounds off the opposite ropes, going for the Stankonia 2.0—but Eric pops up with a reverse neckbreaker! He hooks Stank into a small package, 1-2-Stank JUST kicks out! Stank looks like he could be shooting smoke from his nose as he turns to face Eric, who dodges between the ropes. However, Stank doesn’t much care and charges Eric hard, splashing him as he is trapped between the first and second rope. He pounds on him while trapped in the ropes, the referee trying to hold him back until he grabs Eric’s waist and yanks him out into a release belly-to-belly suplex. Eric howls upon landing, but Stank runs over and grabs him from behind for a German suplex! He nails one, rolls over, gets a second! He rolls over about to go for a hat trick—but Eric hits an Ace Crusher Stunner, pulling Stank’s jaw down into the shoulder, sending Stank flying back.
Eric watches a woozy Stank get up to his knees, bounds off the ropes, hits Stank with a running ensiguri or however it is spelled. Stank flops back, at which point Eric points to the top rope as the fans cheer. Eric climbs up, posing on each turnbuckle and pulling off an exaggerated chest slap at the top. Eric jumps with the elbow and lands…right on Stank’s back, as he already got to a standing position.. STANK-U! STANK-U! An aggravated Stank goes for the cover….1….2….3 before Eric can kick out.
WINNER in 9:09…Stank.
Stank storms out before his arm can be raised, heading to the back. Eric, frustrated, gets a decent amount of applause from the audience as he gets up. He raises his PHWF Quadruple Crown Championship as it is returned to him, and signs the Wheaties Box for a fan.
DRINK & DESTROY vs. THE FLYIN HAWAIIANS – Steel Cage MatchUp next, a steel cage match! This is not your typical steel cage match though, it is not to settle a brutal grudge between two teams, the cage is essentially there to make sure they keep it in the ring and we don’t get anymore wild all over the arena brawls. Drink and Destroy are announced first, and the crowd goes nuts. DVD leads Danny Taylor and Outback Jack to the ring and they step into the cage. This is certainly not their first rodeo inside a cage. The Flyin’ Hawaiians are announced next and Kai and Aina are led to the ring by Noelani. They get a nice ovation from the crowd as well. They climb into the cage and the four men meet in the center of the ring and….shake hands. That may be a first in OOWF history there, shaking hands BEFORE a steel cage match. Aina and Taylor head to their corners, Jack and Kai remain in the middle of the ring, DVD and Noelani take their places on opposite sides of the ring, the referee calls for the bell and we are ready to go!
Jack and Kai lock up, Kai breaks the lock up and BLASTS Jack with a chop to the chest. Jack just stands there and looks at him, then unleashes a mighty belch and chops Kai back. Now Kai just stands there looking at Jack. He bellows a mighty Hawaiian roar and chops Jack back. Then Jack, then Kai, then Jack, then Kai, then Jack, then Kai. The fans are cheering this loudly, and you kind of get the feeling that, if left alone, they would be chopping one another like a couple of Zaxes, refusing to move…..ever. But finally Kai catches Jack with a knee to the gut and sends him to the ropes and elevates him with a big back body drop. Jack hits the mat and pops back to his feet, Kai grabs him in a side head lock, but Jack sends him to the ropes, Jack keeps low and Kai leap frogs him and bounds off the ropes and Jack catches him with a powerslam and covers for a one count.
Jack pulls Kai to his feet and throws him into the corner and tags in Taylor. Danny comes in and drives his shoulder into Kai’s midsection, then whips him across to a neutral corner, but Kai shows his agility, he climbs the corner, turns and catches Taylor with a flying cross body block for a two count. Kai rolls to his corner and tags in Aina, they wait for Taylor to get to his feet and take him to the mat with TOTAL ELIMINATION (not lost on you TFDU fans, it is also the Call of the Wild) Aina covers Taylor but once again the big man kicks out at two. Taylor gets to his feet and staggers into the corner, Aina charges in, but Taylor takes a few steps out and catches him in mid air and drops him on the turnbuckle, SNAKE EYES! But everyone should know that you cannot hurt a Hawaiian by hitting him on the head, so Aina turns to Taylor and bellows something in Hawaiian, Taylor kicks him in the gut and DRIVES him to the mat with a DDT. Taylor floats over and covers, but Aina kicks out at two. Taylor sends Aina to the ropes and catches him on the rebound and PLANTS him with a side slam. Taylor grabs Aina’s legs and drops a headbutt to the groin, then turns him over in a BOSTON CRAB! Aina struggles, and the referee asks him several times if he wants to submit, but Aina refuses. Finally, he makes it to the bottom rope and forces the break.
Taylor reaches out and tags in Jack, he comes into the ring and drops a knee across the back of Aina’s face, driving it into the mat. Jack pulls him to his feet and sends him to the ropes and catches him on the rebound with a SPINEBUSTER! Jack covers, but Aina kicks out at two. The crowd is solidly behind both teams now, cheering for all four. Jack pulls a dazed Aina to his feet and charges at him from across the ring and tries a cross body block, but Aina ducks out of the way and Jack slams face first into the cage and hits the mat. Aina pulls him to his feet and lifts him for a suplex, then shows his strength by walking to his corner and tagging in Kai. Kai climbs to the top rope and they hit a suplex/crossbody on Jack! Kai covers, but Jack kicks out at two.
Jack gets to his feet and staggers to the corner, Kai tags Aina back into the match and he charges into the corner, but Jack catches him with an elbow to the side of the head. Aina staggers and starts climbing the cage, Jack climbs after him, the two of them get halfway up the side of the cage, and Jack grabs him ad hits a belly to back suplex, sending BOTH of them to the mat! Jack drapes an arm across Aina, but he kicks out. Jack crawls toward the corner and is about to make the tag to Taylor when Kai comes into the ring. The referee moves to get Kai out of the ring, and he never sees Jack tag Taylor! Taylor comes into the ring and pulls Aina up and sets him up for a TOMBSTONE but the referee turns around and orders him back out of the ring. Taylor protests, miming that the tag had been made, but the referee will hear (get it) none of it! Jack comes back in to argue and gets BLINDSIDED by a superkick to the jaw from Aina! Aina tags in Kai, and Kai climbs to the top rope, then heads to the top of the cage! He steadies himself, then hits a SUPERFLY SPLASH on Jack! The crowd is STUNNED! Kai covers, Aina keeps Taylor from breaking up the pin, and the ref counts one, two, THREE!
WINNERS in 18:44 – The Flyin’ Hawaiians
After the match Noelani comes into the ring and celebrates with Kai and Aina. DVD comes in and consoles Jack and Taylor. The six of them meet in the middle of the ring and there is a brief moment of tension, then the six of them exchange handshakes. The crowd roars as D&D raise the Flyin Hawaiian’s arms in victory.
