OOWF MidWeek Mayhem
Live! From Tunis, Tunisia
MATT FOLZ vs. CHRIS EVANS – Round Robin Tournament for an Onslaught Title Shot – Match 1The Tunisian crowd has their booing muscles ready for this one. Thankfully, they've had plenty of practice over the last few months. Out first is Chris Evans as “The Trooper” fires up. He gets a quality booing as he makes his way to the ring. Evans doesn't seem to care, actually egging the crowd on at one point before laughing and getting into the ring. The camera cuts to the crowd, and we see a well-dressed young man holding a rainbow colored sign saying “The Life Partners” on it. Huh. “Baker Street” fires up, and Matt Folz comes onto the stage next, soaking up the boos like The Rock sniffing the air. Douche. He makes his way down, antagonizing the crowd as best he can in English. He climbs into the ring and taunts the crowd again. Again, the camera cuts to another well-dressed young man holding a rainbow colored sign saying “The Life Partners” on it. Folz and Evans turn toward each other in the ring, but “Pull Me Under” fires up and the crowd goes nuts as Davin Moreland appears at the top of the stage holding a chair, some Dunkin' Donuts Iced Coffee and what appears to be some poster board. His hands are full, so no high-fiving, but he does lots of nodding and smiling before planting his chair right at the end of the ramp. He takes a sip of coffee before sitting, and unrolling his poster board. As you may have guessed, it's rainbow-colored, it says “No One Sucks It Quite Like The Life Partners”. Clever. Draws a pop. Evans and Folz are seething at Davin from inside the ring, but Davin just waves and takes a sip of coffee. Evans and Folz turn to each other and shake hands, drawing boos but pops from the well-dressed young men in the audience. Senior Referee Davis Hightower has been enlisted to moderate the tournament, so he calls for the bell...WE'RE UNDERWAY!
Another handshake. This is disgusting. Lockup goes Folz' way, as the taller man shoves Evans into the corner. Clean break. Another lockup, and Folz works a headlock this time. Yay! A real wrestling move! Evans tries to reverse into a takeover, but Folz hangs on with the headlock. Head Scissors by Evans breaks the hold, but also draws some hoots and hollers from the crowd. Both Folz and Evans are heated as they look over at Davin who golf claps toward them. Evans goes over to the ropes to say something to Davin, but Folz takes the opportunity to ROLL HIM UP! 1....2...Evans JUST does kick out, and he looks up at Folz, seriously pissed off. Folz just shrugs like “what else am I supposed to do?” Evans responds with a right hook to the jaw. He follows that up with another, and then another. Folz. Folz is rocked as Evans hits the far ropes. Clothesline from Hades followed with a quick cover gets 2. Evans waits for Folz to get to his feet, sorta, before scooping him up. Lethal Vortex and that might do it! 1...2...no! Folz kicks out.
Evans pulls Folz up and whips him to the ropes. Evans tries for a conventional dropkick off the rebound, but Folz holds on! Evans bounces right back up and charges. Folz gives him the ol' Low Bridge and Evans flies out to the mat near where Davin is sitting. Davin
Pulls A Daria which draws a chuckle from the 12 people in attendance who get the reference. Evans tries to shake out the cobwebs, but turns around just in time to eat a Corkscrew Plancha from Folz. Ok, that was pretty cool. Folz gestures to the crowd. Boo. He pulls the weary Evans up, and hits a Release German right on the ramp. Ow. A couple of stomps later and he starts to pull Evans up again for something else. He hears counting and sees Davin giving a count! 8....9....Folz runs with Evans to get him in the ring and looks up at Hightower as he rolls in himself. Hightower is a little surprised as his count is only at 5. Folz is fuming and decides to take it out on his good buddy Evans. Face smash to the turnbuckle, lather, rinse, repeat. Evans is in a bad way. Folz races to the top rope as Evans stumbles around out of the corner. Top Rope Clothesline a la Kane. That's gonna get a cover, and that gets a long 2. Folz slaps the mat, annoyed he can't put Evans away.
Folz pulls Evans up again and whips him to the ropes. Spinning Spinebuster and that looked brutal! Cover again...1...2....thrNO! Folz gets in Hightower's face, who simply holds up 2 fingers. Suspensions are bad, Matt. Just ask Moose. He pulls Evans up again, but this time just destroys him with an Impaler DDT. Instead of a cover, Folz goes to the Folzmission! Evans is in HUGE trouble as Hightower leans in, asking if Evans will quit. He says no, and tries to power out of the move. No go. So Evans gets creative and hits the Greco-Roman Thumb to the Eye. Apparently, that's enough, and Folz sells it like he just took a paintball to the cornea. Evans pulls himself up by the ropes, and is actually getting a little face-poppage at the same time. He gets over to Folz, who is still rolling around like someone shot his pinky toe. He pulls Folz up, and hits a German Suplex, but hangs on! Uh oh, we know where this is headed...CHIMERAPLEX from Evans! Folz is done for! He pulls Folz up...Codebreaker! No Wait! JERICHO SPECIAL! Folz is locked in the Google Plates and is in huge trouble! What a turn of events! Hightower leans in, and it looks like Folz is fading out. His arms are flailing around wildly, and suddenly one of them accidentally drills Hightower in the yam bag. As you'd expect, one would think Hightower just got hit in the balls with a sniper rifle. Evans sees this, but figures he can choke out Folz anyway, so he keeps the hold locked. However, a special INC shows Folz reaching into his tights as he fights to stay conscious. He pulls out a set of brass knuckles! He gets them on his hand, and KNUCKS SHOT TO EVANS' TEMPLE! Evans immediately falls unconscious and the hold is released. Folz shoves the knucks down his tights again and covers just as Hightower regains his faculties.
WINNER in 18:26 by PINFALL...Matt Folz. Folz is 1-0 in the round robin. Evans is 0-1
JW WESTGAARD vs. DH MAGNUSSONJW Westgaard makes his way to the ring first to the tune of “This Life,” getting a huge pop because he’s a returning star, and also everyone loves Australians. Mostly. Like, presumably not New Zealanders. DH Magnusson is out next to the tune of “Alcohoulin’ Ass”, and he also gets a nice pop from the many fans carrying Drink and Destroy signs (though most are focused on DDT).
We have a pre-match handshake from the friends, Angelo Barros calls for the bell, and we have an immediate lock up. DH Magnusson grabs the go-behind waist lock. JW Westgaard reverses. DH Magnusson elbows JW Westgaard a couple times, then reverses himself. JW Westgaard grabs DH Magnusson in a headlock, and flips DH Magnusson over with a flying mare. DH Magnusson is up, we have a small bit of applause, and then another lock-up. This time, JW Westgaard grabs the arm lock. DH Magnusson twists and reverses it, and whips JW Westgaard into the ropes. DH Magnusson lowers his head for the back body drop, but JW Westgaard catches him with a sunset flip for a one count.
Both men get to their feet. JW Westgaard hits DH Magnusson in the gut with a sole kick, doubling him over. He looks for some kind of Fameasser type move, but DH Magnusson straightens up, flipping him off. JW Westgaard impressively lands on his feet. DH Magnusson grabs JW Westgaard, and goes for an Irish whip, but JW Westgaard reverses and sends DH Magnusson into the second rope with a drop toe hold. JW Westgaard runs the ropes, J-W-W double knees! JW Westgaard lands on the apron and heads to the top rope. Point to the fans, as DH Magnusson hauls himself up, then JW Westgaard leaps off the top with a flying cross body press. It lands in a pinning position and JW Westgaard gets a two count. DH Magnusson quickly rolls out of the ring to recover as Westgaard smiles.
JW Westgaard runs and slides out of the ring. He spins DH Magnusson around, but as he spins DH Magnusson absolutely decks JW Westgaard with a right hand. JW Westgaard stumbles away, and DH Magnusson charges, shoulder tackling him into a turnbuckle. Ouch, looks like that wrenched JW Westgaard’s back a little. DH Magnusson rolls JW Westgaard into the ring. As JW Westgaard starts to get up DH Magnusson drops an elbow on his back. JW Westgaard collapses to the floor and DH Magnusson starts working on the Reflex-O-Lock. JW Westgaard starts howling in pain. But before DH Magnusson can grapevine the hold, JW Westgaard manages to kick him in the chest with his other leg. DH Magnusson drops the hold and stumbles away. But as JW Westgaard gets to his feet, clutching his back, DH Magnusson charges and tackles the leg that had been Reflex-O-Locked. JW Westgaard drops to the ground again. DH Magnusson looks at JW Westgaard’s back and grins, then runs the ropes, hops over JW Westgaard, and runs the opposite ropes, and it’s the flyin’ shoulderblockin’, planted square on JW Westgaard’s back. DH Magnusson goes for the pin- and JW Westgaard immediately kicks out with force. DH Magnusson stumbles against the ropes as JW Westgaard leaps to his feet. He looks energized, his back troubles forgotten. As DH Magnusson leans against the ropes in surprise, JW Westgaard takes him over with a clothesline. DH Magnusson collapses to the outside floor. JW Westgaard poses for the fans, then runs the ropes and as DH Magnusson gets up, does a neat suicide dive through the second and third rope, hitting DH Magnusson like a missile. Both men crash against the railing.
Angelo Barros starts the ten count, JW Westgaard is up at five. He picks up DH Magnusson and rolls him into the ring. He puts DH Magnusson in a wheelbarrow hold, but DH Magnusson rolls through and reverses into a Neck Cutter on the upswing! DH Magnusson goes for the pin, one, two, two and a half, and JW Westgaard kicks out. DH Magnusson can barely believe it. He picks up JW Westgaard, who immediately spins around him with a knee to the gut on his way..He hooks the big sonofabitch up for an ICE AUGUR! One, two, three, and JW Westgaard gets the victory!
WINNER in 11:11 – JW Westgaard
J-Dub-Dub has his hand raised in victory, then goes to help up DH who waves him off, rolling out of the ring to let Westgaard have his moment as he walks to the back, frustrated
KAI vs. TYTANKai makes his way to the ring first, accompanied by Noelani. He acknowledges the fans, but as soon as he enters the ring, his demeanor changes and he is all business. Tytan makes his way down next to a smattering of boos. Tytan snarls but otherwise pays no heed. Tytan and Kai get nose to nose, the ref tries to finish explaining the rules, but Kai and Tytan waste no time in starting. The fists are flying, and the ref calls for the bell. Tytan and Kai exchange haymakers, and Tytan gets a momentary advantage. He backs Kai into a corner and goes for a strong elbow. Kai ducks and then pulls Tytan into the corner. Kai lights him up with a chop that draws a woo from the crowd. This just seems to piss Tytan off, and he chops him back. The two exchange chops for what seems like minutes, and both men start to develop welts across their chests.
Tytan switches it up and nails a kick to the gut. He picks Kai up and drops him with a scoop slam. Tytan follows with an elbow and goes for the pin. Kai kicks out at one. Tytan pulls him up and attempts a suplex, Kai is able to block and counter with one of his own. Kai floats over and attempts an armlock. Tytan sees it coming and rolls to grab the rope before Kai can lock it in. Tytan uses the ropes to pull himself up, but when he turns Kai nails him with a dropkick sending him out of the ring. Kai follows out and the two men begin exchanging blows outside the ring. Kai goes to whip Tytan into the barricade, but it's reversed and Kai crashes into it back first. Tytan charges in for the big boot, but Kai dodges and Tytan crotches himself. At this point the count has reached eight and Kai slides back into the ring. The ref nearly reaches ten, but Tytan barely makes it in.
Kai takes advantage, hitting a chop block that takes Tytan down. He bounces off the ropes and nails a flipping leg drop. Tytan is back on his feet, but woozy. Kai does not let up and lays in with a combo of chops and kicks. Tytan is able to finally catch one Kai's legs. He is unable to get anymore of an advantage, as Kai nails an enziguri. Kai follows up with a lung blower, and Tytan is down. Kai heads up top and leaps with a flying head butt. It connects and Kai covers. Tytan gets his shoulder up, but it is a half a second too late.
WINNER in 13:12 Kai
Tytan rolls out of the ring, not satisfied, but not taking any other action. Kai seems to have returned a smile to his face and celebrates with some fan as Noelani smirks nearby.
CHRIS EVANS vs. DAVIN MORELAND – Round Robin Tournament for an Onslaught Title Shot – Match 2“The Trooper” fires up and we see Chris Evans ignoring the crowd and heading down the ramp to the ring. If he were paying attention, he'd hear a few sympathy cheers after the way he got fucked over in the last match. He seems to have cleared all the cobwebs however and looks ready to go as he faces his former mentor in this one. And speaking of his former mentor, the first guitar strains of “Pull Me Under” fire up and the crowd goes batshit crazy. Big smile from the big man as he brought his own Sharpie. The song goes through 3 times (which is impressive if you're familiar with the song) as he signs anything and everything the crowd has to put out there. Finally, Davin does his Double Jump of Impressive Athleticism into the ring, and does a full 4-Turnbuckle Salute to the crowd. Before anything else can happen, “Baker Street” fires up, and Folz comes down the ramp with a chair. He unfolds it and plants himself right at the bottom of the mat. Apparently he's going to watch. Once he's done, Hightower wakes up Evans and calls for the bell...WE'RE UNDERWAY!
Davin strides to the center of the ring and puts his hand out like he wants to shake hands with his former protégé. I guess this is his Tribute to The Stinger. Predictably, the result is a big Slap the Taste Out Your Mouth slap from Evans. It spins Davin around and Evans immediately jumps on him. Lungblower from Evans and Davin falls all the way into the ropes, like in 619 position. Evans does have SOME sort of respect for himself, so he eschews the 619 for a running leap over the top rope, landing on Davin's head, forcing Davin throat-first hard onto the middle rope. Evans is proud of himself out on the floor, and draws some boos. Evans takes a couple steps back and hits a Running Enziguri on Davin which hits him right in the temple. Evans is so accurate with those. Davin goes flying backward and seems to be out cold on the mat. Evans scrambles to the top rope looking to end this thing early. He takes off, and it's a TORONTO TWISTER! Davin rolls out of the way, but Evans manages to land on his feet! Davin gets to his knees, and Evans is already sprinting full speed. Olympic Strike! Boy, he put that one right on the temple as well. Davin again looks like he's out cold. Evans covers! 1....2....Davin grabs the bottom rope. Evans thinks he's won, so he raises his arms. Hightower has to break the bad news to him, and Evans can't believe it. Davin is still apparently unconscious, so Evans goes for a ran to the far ropes. Basement Dropkick on Davin sends him flying all the way into the barrier.
Davin starts using the barrier to pull himself up, but Evans is already on the run again. He starts from the far side of the ring, and looks for a No Hands Plancha. But Davin, clearly playing some possum (something Davin is really good at), and punches Evans in his stomach in mid-air like Evans was a volleyball. Evans' forward momentum nearly stops and instead starts to go up. On the way back down, Davin hits him with a defensive REALLY GOOD DIAMOND CUTTER. That draws a big-time pop, but it's not going to do Davin much good as he falls immediately back down. Hightower is on the counting warpath.
He gets to 7 when Davin starts to stir. At 8, he's up and pulls Evans with him, and they both roll into the ring at 9. Davin's to his feet when Evans starts trying to get up. Davin grabs him and hoists him into the air in a Vertical Suplex. Davin holds him....holds him...and continues to hold him. Finally he shakes his arm and holds it to his ear like he's checking his watch. He shrugs and then drives Evans to the mat. His momentum almost forces Evans back to his feet, which is great for Davin as he nearly cuts Evans in half with a Spear. He gets right over Evans and says something to him, something that probably isn't very nice. After that, he walks to the ropes facing the ramp...and Matt Folz. He just stares at him smiling while Folz unleashes a string of obscenities at him. Davin blows him a kiss which riles Folz up even more as he kicks away the chair. The crowd enjoys this immensely. Davin turns around just in time to see Evans running at him. Davin catches him and destroys him with a Powerslam.
Cole: SCOOP SLAM!
Davin points out at the still standing Folz, which gets the crowd into things more. Davin turns around this time and eats Eye Of The Storm from Evans! Davin falls like a sack of potatoes as Folz can't contain his glee on the outside. Evans, who is in rough shape, does everything he can to drag himself over to Davin. He drapes an arm across! 1....2...thrNO! Davin got his foot on the rope! Evans just slumps to the mat, dejected that he couldn't put him away. Davin rolls to his stomach, and Evans perks up a bit. He puts Davin in a hammerlock and then flips and bridges up...This One's Gonna Hurt! Actually, this one's gonna wake Davin up, as he screams to Hightower that there's no fucking way he's going to tap out. Way to draw the kids in, douche. Davin inches to the nearest ropes, and uses them to run up and flip completely over onto his feet. The hold's broken momentarily, but Evans is still hanging on. Bad luck for him. Cross-Arm Breaker is locked in, and now it's Evans who is promising not to tap. He flops around a bit, but does manage to get to the ropes. Hightower forces a clean break, eliciting a “I HAVE TIL 5!” from Davin. Heh. He waits for Evans to get himself near standing, and strikes. REALLY GOOD DIAMOND CUTTER gets a big pop from the fans. Folz sits back down on the outside. Davin feigns like he's going to cover, but then shakes his head no, and positions Evans. He locks him into a SHARPSHOOTER and is staring right at Folz the whole time. Pointing. To his credit, Evans hangs in a very long time, but eventually, it's too much.
WINNER in 14:38 by SUBMISSION...Davin Moreland! Davin Moreland is 1-0 in the Round Robin Tournament. Chris Evans is 0-2.
“Super Bon Bon” fires up as Davin slowly gets to his feet to the roar of the crowd. He slides under the bottom rope and gets right in Matt Folz' face, who tries to stand his ground the best he can against the bigger man. Hightower is doing yeoman's work as ref tonight, and gets in between the two. Davin smirks and simply says (we think through reading lips) “Cock a doodle doo, motherfucker” and gestures to Folz to move as he walks up the ramp – which just so happens to coincide with the song lyrics “Move up the side, and let the man go through”.
AINA vs. LD WILLIAMS“Machinehead” by Bush plays, with Aina wearing the fierce dress of the night Marcher as he storms down to the rig accompanied by Noelani. The transformation continues to confuse the fans, who show it in their reaction. Aina’ slow entrance is interrupted by the bursting through the curtain of LD Williams. LD foregoes the slow entrance for a quick slide into the ring. Aina gestures for Noelani to back down, and LD Williams stares him down as the announcements are made. The referee calls for the bell, and both men lock-up as we are underway!
Aina fiercely dives forward and immediately takes control with a side headlock, but LD Williams simply pushes him off. A second lock-up results, with Aina playing his own power/leverage game and working the right arm for a minute or so, locking in an arm bar pushing his foot behind LD Williams’s knee to get him to the mat. LD Williams slowly makes his way to his feet, so Aina goes behind to control LD Williams with a hammerlock. LD Williams turns under the arm to reverse the hammerlock on Aina, who immediately reaches to the back of LD Williams head and flips over his shoulders, landing on his feet behind LD Williams. Aina hits a standing dropkick that sends LD Williams to the outside! Aina hits the opposite ropes, coming across and flying over the top with an In Blackest Night suicide dive on LD Williams. LD Williams maintains his balance, and guides Aina over his shoulders, over the railing and into the front row!
LD Williams slowly pulls Aina back over the rail, and rolls him into the ring. LD Williams follows Aina in, and goes to work on the neck. LD Williams starts off with a front chancery, locked in so tight that Aina can’t seem to escape. Aina maintains movement, flailing wildly as Noelani calls for him to break, so the ref doesn’t check for a submission or TKO. After nearly over a minute in the hold, Aina’s movement has gotten him close enough to the ropes to force a break with his foot. LD Williams stays relentless, dropping several knees to the back of Aina’s neck. He pulls Aina back to the center of the ring, and looks to lock in a standing front chancery, but Aina lifts LD Williams for an inverted atomic drop. LD Williams pushes off, landing on his feet. Aina charges, but LD Williams moves and Aina connects with a shoulder to the ring post! LD Williams immediately lifts Aina up for a shoulder breaker over his knee!
LD Williams positions Aina in a for a Dragon Sleeper, but modifies it to lock in his other arm to Aina’s shoulder, separating both, putting Aina in a lot of pain. The ref asks, but the transformed Aina doesn’t even consider quitting. LD Williams locks it in tighter and tighter, but Aina doesn’t budge, leading to LD Williams repeatedly pounding on Aina’s check with forearms, then locking the move back in. Aina writhes in pain, but slowly builds back up to his feet. Aina turns to relieve the pressure, and gets into position to connect with a belly-to-back suplex! The move also takes a lot of Aina, and LD Williams pops right back up to his feet first and immediately hits a Harley Race knee that sends Aina down! What a veteran (old man) move!
With Aina slow to get up, LD Williams starts to signal for the Canadian Destroyer. The announcers, crowd, Sexy Female Journalists, Bloggers, and pretty much everyone but Aina knows what’s coming. As LD pulls Aina between the legs, Aina proves he did know it was coming when he grabs LD’s arm and rolls him into an inside cradle...1...2...LD reverses the move, and the referee counts again, 1....2...3!
WINNER in 8:07…LD Williams.
LD slides out of the ring and accepts the applause of the fans as Noelani slides in to check on the shoulder of Aina; the injury probably prevented some leverage on the last pin.
KETSUEKI SEISHIN vs. J-P SPARXX“Black Sabbath” plays and Ketsueki Seishin comes out to the top of the ramp, flanked by Moosehead Jack and Aisha. The boos reign down on this trio, but none of them seem to notice. Moose threatens a few fans with HDB as they head to the ring, but the fans keep their distance. Ket climbs into the ring and waits stoically in the corner for his opponent. “Let it Rock” plays and J-P Sparxx comes out, with him is Jewell and Davin Moreland. The crowd erupts in cheers and the three stop for a moment to soak it in and pose for a few pics. Sparxx sprints to the ring and slides under the bottom rope. The second he gets to his feet, Ket charges out of the corner and attacks! The bell rings, and we are under way!
Ket charges out of the corner and tries to catch Sparxx with a chop, but Sparxx ducks it and catches Ket with a kick to the gut. Ket doubles over and Sparxx hammers him with punches to the back of the head, but Ket grabs a waist lock and drives Sparxx back into the corner. Seishin rocks Sparxx with several European uppercuts, then whips him to the opposite corner, but Sparxx scales the ropes and turns and lands a perfect cross body block for a one count.
Sparxx is quickly back to his feet and tries a spinning heel kick on Ket as he gets to his feet, but Ket catches Sparxx leg and dumps him to the mat with a capture suplex. Sparxx hits the mat hard, and manages to get to one knee, where Ket unleashes a BARRAGE of kicks, to the ribs then to the side of the head that sends Sparxx to the floor. The second he hits the floor, Moose starts around the ring, but so does Davin. The two of them get to Sparxx at the same time, and we have a good old fashioned stare down. Sparxx gets to his feet and looks at Davin, Davin motions for him to turn around and Sparxx sees Moose standing there with HDB grinning like a Cheshire cat. Sparxx takes a step toward Moose, but he gets BLINDSIDED by Ket, diving through the ropes and catching him with a brutal forearm to the side of the head.
Ket pulls Sparxx to his feet and whips him into the guard rail, then BLISTERS him with chops. Ket steps back and bows to Sparxx, then catches him with a BRUTAL kick to the jaw that sends Sparxx over the guard rail into the crowd. Ket grabs him and drags him over the ramp and rolls him back into the ring and follows, then covers him for a two count. Ket pulls Sparxx up and backs him into a corner and sets him on the top rope. Ket climbs up and tries for a superplex, but Sparxx catches him with several shots to the ribs, then shoves him off the top rope. Ket lands hard on the back of his head and appears to be stunned. Sparxx stands up, then leaps onto the ropes and hits a springboard splash on Ket, covers him, hooking the leg hard and gets a two count. Ket manages to kick out JUST before the three!
Sparxx pulls Ket to his feet and lands a kick to his gut, then takes him to the mat with a snap suplex, rolls through and covers, but Ket kicks out at two. Sparxx gets to his feet and waits for Ket to get up and lines up a superkick, but before he can throw it, Moose reaches in and grabs Sparxx’s let! Sparxx turns around and kicks at Moose, who lets go and avoids the kick, the referee turns around and yells at Moose. With the referee’s back turned, Sparxx turns back to Ket and gets blinded by GREEN MIST! Before Ket can cover Sparxx, Davin climbs into the ring, spins Ket around and DROPS him with a REALLY GOOD DIAMOND CUTTER! Davin grabs Sparxx and drags him on top of Ket. The referee turns around and sees the pin, hits the mat and counts, one, two, THREE!
WINNER in 14:51 – J-P Sparxx
After the match, Moose gets into the ring to protest, which also brings Davin into the ring. The two of them stand there and argue. Just when it looks like they are about to come to blows Moose backs off. We quickly see why. Matt Folz has hit the ring with a lead pipe in his hand. He SLAMS it on the side of Davin’s knee and Davin collapses to the mat, grabbing his knee, obviously in intense pain. Folz steps toward the ropes and shakes hands with Moose, then tosses the lead pipe aside. The contestants for our next match are already in the ring, so let’s get to it!
MATT FOLZ vs. DAVIN MORELAND – Round Robin Tournament for an Onslaught Title Shot – FinalsWell, no tie games in this tournament. Thank you to the booker for not insulting our intelligence. This is the de-facto finals matchup between Davin Moreland and Matt Folz – Winner gets a World Heavywight Title Shot. As we saw earlier this evening, Folz did his best to gain a big advantage in tonight's match. In fact, there's still no guarantee Davin will make this match at all. We head to the back. Davin's there, as are the Angels, and a Doctor with a Really Long Needle.
DM: C'mon Doc, shoot it up. No big deal.
DwRLN: No big deal? At best you won't be able to feel your knee. At worst, you'll be able to kind of feel your knee, except that feeling will just be pain. I can't imagine that will be helpful in a wrestling match.
DM: It'll be fine. Do it.
OGMSJ: Davin, don't. Listen, I KNOW about Cortizone, k? It's not worth it. Bag the match, take the week off to rest it.
SFJ420: Dude, she's right. Not enough pot in the world to make that feel better tonight, man.
SDM: Honey, listen to us. Please. No match.
DM: Uh, wow. You all realize what this is for, right? World Title Shot? These things don't come around every day. I mean, I've been losing all the time and I STILL haven't gotten one.
SDM: And what do you care? You've won it 4 times.
DM: So? I want to win it 5 times.
SDM: You can. Just not this way, ok?
DM: I don't think you understand. This is the World Title.
SDM: This is your knee.
DM: FUCK my knee. This is the World Motherfucking Title we're talking about. I don't give a blue fuck about anything other than going out there and kicking that little fairy's ass.
OGMSJ: Davin-
DM: Oh my God...SHUT UP! Shawn, if you had to choose between having a chance to do a floor routine for a Gold Fucking Medal and taking the week off to rest your back which hurts...which would you do?
OGMSJ: Well...
DM: Shawn?
OGMSJ: Samantha? Let him get the shot.
SDM: WHAT? Shawn-
OGMSJ: I get it now. Let him get the shot or we're all going to regret it for the next million years until he dies.
SDM: Davin. I don't give a fuck about the world title, ok? I want you to be able to walk around, you know? Hold your kid normally and not in a fucking Hoverround. Do I make myself clear?
OGMSJ: Too late, Sam.
*”Baker Street” starts to play in the background *
DM: Now, Doc. Hurry.
*The doctor sighs and injects Davin's knee *
DM: Thank you.
SDM: This conversation isn't over, you know. I can't believe you just DID that! How fucking selfish and-
OGMSJ: Sam...Sam...*pats her shoulder* I'll explain it to you, ok?
DM: *kisses Shawn on the top of the head* I knew I hired you for a reason, Midget. Now *flexes his knee and tries to stand on it, normally, going slowly*, I've got a title shot to win, and a little pansy-ass to kick. If you ladies will excuse me...“Baker Street” fires up, and Matt Folz makes his way down the ramp, smiling as the crowd boos and throws things at him. He doesn't care, and in fact does the heel-point-to-his-head-because-he's-wicked-smaht thing. He climbs in and taunts the crowd some more as Hightower shakes his head. “Pull Me Under” quickly fires up, and the crowd goes batshit. Davin Moreland slowly walks down the ramp, shaking out his leg as if he's trying to get used to it. It's a slight limp, but seems to be doing ok. That is, until he gets to the edge of the ring to do his Double Jump of Awesome Athleticism. He's about to try it, but does think better of it and uses the conventional method of getting into the ring. The ring steps. Folz is visibly laughing at this, but surprisingly, Davin doesn't seem to care. In fact, he's not acknowledging anything going on around him, it appears. That, that's weird. Hightower seems satisfied that both people are there, so he calls for the bell...WE'RE UNDERWAY!
Folz gets right up to Davin, talking a lot of shit. I think there was something about his mother in there. Davin says nothing, his face completely emotionless. Again, really weird. Folz acts like he's going to back off, but instead tries to blast Davin in the knee with a big kick. The big man reacts very quickly, and grabs Folz by the ankle before he can connect. Dragon Screw Leg Whip from Davin sends Folz to the mat, and in fact, he rolls all the way to the outside, trying to get his own knee in working order. However, he commits the cardinal sin, and faces away from the ring. Davin gets some forward momentum, and Tope Con Hilo connects on Folz! Davin manages to land on his feet, albeit awkwardly. He's showing no effects from earlier, other than he doesn't really know where that leg is landing. Davin WHIPS Folz into the STEEL POST and rolls into the ring to break the count. Folz went in face-first, and we see a trail of blood trickling from his forehead. Davin exacerbates this by several Greco-Roman Head Smashes on the STEEL STEPS. This is followed up by a Jericho Bulldog on the same steps, and a roll back into the ring.
Folz is in some pretty rough shape at this point, flat on his back in the middle of the ring. Davin heads to the top rope! Macho Man Elbow connects right to the heart of Folz. A cover, and Folz kicks out just as Hightower's arm was coming down. Davin doesn't hesitate, and locks in a Liontamer, the good knee on the neck of Folz' neck. Folz is in a really bad way. But just when things start to look the darkest for him, he manages to wiggle one of his legs free, and kick Davin in the head. It doesn't take him down, but forces him to break the hold. Folz tries to rush Davin, but Davin sidesteps and hits a Drop Toe Hold. But that's not all. He's trying to lock on an STF! But Folz feels it coming and manages to escape to the floor again. This time, Davin heads to the top rope. As Folz stands, he tries for a Missile Dropkick, but Folz does the Samoa Joe Walk Away thing, and Davin lands on his feet.
Unfortunately in this case, that's a really bad thing, because Davin's knee immediately buckles and he felt it, despite the Cortizone shot. Davin tries to stand, but Folz charges him, and hits a Running Tornado DDT! That was pretty cool. Folz drags Davin to the ring and throws him in. Folz hits the top rope, and nails Davin with a Frogsplash! That could do it. 1....2....no. Folz doesn't stop however, and locks in an STF of his own! He's got the bad knee flexed in the hold, and Davin is absolutely howling in pain. Folz clearly expects this to be only a matter of time, but..
JR: Somehow! Someway!Davin manages to get to the ropes. Folz breaks on 4 and actually waits for Davin to try to get to his feet. It's clear his knee, and everything below, is completely useless at this point. Folz calmly walks over, and Davin swings wildly at him. His momentum spins him around, and Folz hits a Bridging German Suplex! Very cool. 1....2....thrNO! Again, to Folz' credit, he manages to hold his emotions together, and locks in a Figure Four Leglock! First time we've seen this from him, and again, it's the bad knee taking the brunt of the punishment. Again, it's clear he's in serious pain, but isn't quitting. Folz is shocked as Davin manages to somehow get to the ropes again. Folz waits for Davin to kinda stand again. Running Enziguri connects, and Davin lands on all fours. Folz busts out some impressive strength, and gets Davin on his shoulders as he heads to the top rope. It might be that time...LAMBEAU LEAP...but Davin armdrags his way out of it in mid-air! Folz clearly got the worst of that as both men land on their backs. In fact, Davin gets up, and limps his way over to Folz for a LIMPING 450! That connects! 1...2....NO! Folz is able to kick out. Davin gets to his feet, and tries to go back on the attack. From his back, he hits Davin with a Double Thrust Kick right to the chest. It doesn't do much more than knock Davin back a couple of steps, but Hightower, who was out of position standing behind him, gets hit by Davin and looks like he's dead.
Davin tries to rouse Hightower, and it actually looks pretty minor, as Hightower gets to all fours and waves Davin off. Satisfied, Davin turns around just in time to eat some BRASS KNUCKS TO THE TEMPLE! Folz shoves them into his boot and Hightower never saw it. He covers, and that should do it.
WINNER in 27:58 by PINFALL...Matt Folz! Matt Folz finishes with the best record in the Round Robin Tournament and wins the World Heavyweight Title Shot!
Folz starts celebrating to the boos of the crowd having won the Title Shot. Hightower clears his cobwebs and leaves the ring. Davin still appears to be unconscious, but slowly and quietly comes around, telling the crowd to not say anything. In fact, at one point, Folz turns around, and Davin acts dead again. Folz is still reveling in his victory, and climbs up halfway to the middle ropes. Davin dives over there and grabs his boot...in one motion it comes off...and the Knucks Fall Out! Folz is stunned and before he can think to get away, Davin has him on the mat, connecting with Knucks-Assisted Right Hand after Knucks-Assisted Right Hand! Folz is obviously unconscious as his face is completely bloodied while his music plays. There's a buzz in the crowd and Davin stops to see Chris Evans standing at the top of the ramp. Davin lands one more punch, right to the mouth, and it looks like one of Folz' front teeth goes flying. Davin rolls out of the ring and limps (pretty much HOPS) up the ramp as “Super Bon Bon” plays. He finally gets to Evans, and the two staredown a little before Davin flips the knucks in front of Evans. It's then when the eye contact is broken, and Davin heads to the back.
EL LOBO SANGRIENTO vs. MAI MUYO vs. CHAD MADISON vs. PSYKLE – Gauntlet Match for a PPV Onslaught Championship Match”Hero” Plays and Mai Muyo heads to ringside. She loosens up in the corner as [url=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mbH60wCO-Yw
]"God Blessed Texas"[/url] Cranks up and the crowd goes nuts. Chad comes bounding down the aisle, Cowboy Hat, Chaps and all. He removes the outfit as the referee calls for the handshake. Chad takes Mai’s hand and instead of the traditional handshake, kisses the back of her hand and smiles brightly. He is rewarded with a Greco-Roman Right cross. And we’re off
Mai takes the early advantage with a number of surprising strikes and chops. Chad, not expecting this kind of offense early on, staggers back to the ropes and gets his
First Rope Break. Mai makes the clean break, and Chad rubs his jaw slightly. Collar and Elbow Tie up. Side headlock for Madison. Muyo fires him into the ropes…. Leapfrog, Chad hits the opposite rope and rebounds off, Mai attempts a tilt-a whirl backbreaker, which Chad reverses into a flying head scissor. Both Chad and Mai kip up simultaneously. Mai charges in and Chad snaps off a deep Ricky Steamboat-esque armdrag. And another. And another. Chad fires up with the crowd as Muyo regroups on the floor.
Mai climbs in and we square off again. She reverses an Irish whip and hits a flying forearm. She grounds Chad with a series of crisp armbars and leg locks. She grabs a hold of a seated headlock. Chad rolls her over with a pinning predicament. She rolls through it at 2, and back to the headlock. Chad gets to his feet and fires her into the ropes, she ducks the clothesline. Stops and catches Chad with a vicious spinning heel kick to the head. Chad goes down hard. Mai to the corner and scales the ropes. Flying something or another…. And Chad is up to catch her in mid-air. He sits her on the top turnbuckle, Climbs up… SUPERPLEX He floats over for 2, but Mai gets her shoulder up in time. Chad to his feet first. Sizing her up DROPKICK… NOBODY HOME! Mai sees it coming and Chad hits the mat awkwardly. She lets him to his feet. Standing Hurricanrana! Springboard Moonsault! 1…2… and Chad just kicks out. Mai waits for Madison to get to his feet.. Running Enziguri and Chad collapses against the corner. She charges in, Chad backdrops her over the tops rope. She lands on her feet on the apron… and EATS A DROPKICK that sends her to the floor.
Chad Goes to the top turnbuckle.. Somersault Plancha! And they both tumble over the guardrail and into the crowd. Cha dis on his feet at 5. She is up at 8 Chad in the ring at 11, she climbs in at 17. Chad catches her as she gets to her feet. Scoop slam. Second rope Kneedrop. Cover gets 2. Chad up and locks in an Indian Death Lock. Mai struggles to reach the ropes for her
First Rope Break Chad relents momentarily, and Mai pounces, with a number of impactful forearm shots and elbows. Chad staggers, and Mai hits the ropes. Back handspring elbow…INTO A BELLY TO BACK SUPLEX! Chad Bridges and 1…2…3!
Mai Muyo has been EliminatedChad pops up victorious, but only gets a second’s rest as
”Animal I Have Become” Sounds through the arena and Psykle heads to the ring. Chad backs into a corner and waits. Psykle steps over the ropes, and Chad attacks before his second leg hits the mat. DROPKICK! And Psykle stumbles backwards. DROPKICK! AND ANOTHER! Chad has Psykle backed into the corner and mounts the middle rope he lets loose with 1..2..3…4 rights to the head but as the referee’s count reaches 3. Psykle just grabs Chad and plants him with a wicked spinebuster.
Psykle begins to stomp away at Chad. Chad tries crawling away, but Psykle grabs him and pulls him to his feet. Press Slam. Huge legdrop. He lets Chad get to his knees and hits a running knee strike that tumbles Chad to the floor. Psykle follows up and pounds on Chad while the referee counts. Psykle lets the count get to 15 before he tosses Chad in and climbs back in to stop the count at 18. Short arm clothesline. Chad is showing little signs of fighting back at this point. Huge Running Powerslam for 1…2…and Chad is JUST up before 3. Chad crawls away as the referee re-iterates to Psykle that yes, indeed it was only 2.
Chad rolls to the floor and Psykle follows in pursuit. 1…2… Chad gets tossed into the guardrail. 5…6… He bounces off and stumbles up the ramp. 9…10…11… Psykle follows up and tosses Chad into the crowd. Chad crawls back out of the crowd and Psykle shoves him further up the ramp. ….15…16…. Chad turns, runs at Psykle and baseball slides between his legs. 17….18… Chad pops up and runs to ringside, diving under the ropes at 19. Psykle in hot pursuit, climbs halfway up the apron as the referee hits 20.
Psykle has been Eliminated Chad lies on his back, chest heaving mightily as
"Joker and the Thief" cranks up and El Lobo Sangriento makes his way to the howls of the adoring crowd. Psykle is still on the apron, arguing with the official. Lobo pulls Psykle down from behind, causing him to hit his head on the apron. Lobo climbs in and stares Psykle down. Chad has gotten to his feet. Lobo and Chad shake hands and lock up. Lobo easily takes control. Headlock, hip toss, arm bar and abdominal stretch. Chad makes his way to the ropes and gets his
Second Rope Break Lobo makes the clean break, but goes on the offensive immediately, grabbing Chad and sending him flying with a release German suplex. Lobo sends Chad into the ropes, but Chad ducks the clothesline, stops short, and pops off a DROPKICK to Lobo as he turns around.
Chad with a little life here. He gets in a couple of Steamboat armdrags before popping off another dropkick that he follows up with a cover for 2. Lobo kicks out pretty easily, and it seems as if Chad has run out of steam. Lobo pulls Chad to his feet and sends him flying with a razors edge bomb. Lobo sets up for the Boston Crab, but Chad twists, rolls through and grapevines the leg, sending Lobo to the mat. Chad doesn’t have the strength to keep Lobo down at this point. Lobo powers up and shocks him with a head-butt and a springboard elbow! Chad hits the mat hard and Lobo covers for 2. Chad is just able to kick out. Lobo pulls him up and looks to be setting up for the Bala de Plata… Chad backdrops Lobo and falls to his knees. Lobo is up first and scoops Chad up for a slam.. SMALL PACKAGE! Chad gets One….Two…ThrNO!! REVERSAL BY LOBO GETS One…Two… THrNo!! REVERSAL AGAIN AND CHAD GETS One…. Two… THrNO!! Lobo kicks out! The crowd is on its feet screaming with every referee count. Lobo beats Chad to his feet. Chad goes for a DROPKICK…. NOBODY HOME! Lobo pulls Chad up. BALA DE PLATA!! One.. Two… Three. It’s over
WINNER in 19:34 El Lobo Sangriento
BRASS KNUCKLE KINGS vs. DRINK & DESTROY – Non-Title No-Disqualification MatchOutback Jack and Dynamite Danny Taylor appear at the top of the stands to a thunderous ovation. They make their way through the crowd, Danny slapping hands and OBJ guzzling Fosters. When they climb over the barrier to ringside Jack pauses for a moment. His eyes roll back, and when they return, he looks to be somewhere between Outback and Back of Beyond Jack - not a good sign. Drink and Destroy climb into the ring and Danny stretches in the corner while OBJ glares up the aisle. The arena light dim, and “Brass Knuckle Kings” plays as the OOWF World Tag Team Champions, Bryce Larson and Eric O’Mac, step onto the stage. The Kings are accompanied by Lauren Phoenix and Maria Kanellis, and they look Supremely confident as they stride to the ring. Maria and Lauren remove the King’s robes, and they launch into a synchronized shadow boxing routine. The kings remove their title belts and hand them to their seconds as referee Angelo Barros calls both teams to the center of the ring, Barros gives them their instructions, sends Eric and Danny to their corners, and calls for the bell.
Bryce and Jack lock up, and Bryce grabs a headlock. Jack shoots him off into the ropes and drops him with a shoulder block. Jack drops an elbow, but Bryce rolls out of the way. Jack lashes out with a kick, knocking Bryce off balance as he gets up. Jack tosses Bryce into the corner and hammers him with punches. Barros tries to step in, but Jack just turns to him with a frightening smile and then blasts Bryce with a head butt that drops him to the mat. Jack places a boot in Bryce’s throat and chokes him, again ignoring the referee. Jack hauls Bryce to his feet and sends him into the D&D corner. He follows him in with an avalanche and makes the tag.
Jack winds Bryce’s arm and holds him in place for a double axe handle from Danny. Danny takes over the arm and twists it into a hammerlock, and then scoops Bryce and slams him on it. He pulls Bryce to his feet and winds the arm again. Bryce rolls through it and hits an arm drag. Danny rolls to his feet and grabs Bryce, sending him to the ropes. Bryce ducks a clothesline and hits the opposite ropes, where Eric makes the blind tag. Danny snags Bryce out of the air as he tries a cross body, but Eric dropkicks his partner in the back, knocking Danny down.
Taylor throws Bryce off, and Bryce rolls under the ropes to the floor. Before Danny can get up, Eric lands on him with a double stomp. Eric pulls Danny to his feet and takes him over with a suplex, and then locks him in a headlock. Taylor works his way to his feet and tries to suplex out of it, but Eric throws his weight forward and rolls Taylor back to the mat, maintaining the hold. Taylor gets to his knees, and Eric switches his grip to a front facelock. He tries to hit a DDT, but Taylor lifts him up and rams him into the turnbuckles. He repeats the move a second and third time until Eric’s grip slackens. Danny stands up and waffles Eric with a series of chops until Eric buries a knee in his gut. Eric locks his hands behind Taylor’s head and drops, driving his face into the top turnbuckle. Eric slips behind Danny and plants him with a German suplex. He bridges, and gets two before Jack breaks it up.
Jack hauls Eric to his feet and sends him to the ropes. Bryce springboards off the top rope and leaps over Eric, leveling Jack with a dropkick. Eric rebounds off the ropes and hits Jack with a rolling thunder. Eric bounces to his feet - and gets leveled by a clothesline from Danny - who in turn gets dropped by a super kick from Bryce. Bryce rolls out of the ring and comes back with a chair. He sets it up in front of Taylor, who’s starting to stir. OBJ is up, and Bryce throws a super kick, but OBJ catches it. Before he can do anything, however, Eric blasts him with a super kick from the other side. The Kings grab Danny and send him to the ropes - flapjack through the chair! Eric rolls Taylor over and makes the cover, but Danny rolls a shoulder just in time.
The Kings start to pull Taylor to his feet, but see OBJ rising and blast him with twin kicks to the midsection. They send him to the ropes and try for a tandem clothesline, but OBJ ducks it and comes back with a double clothesline of his own. He scoops and slams Bryce, and then sends Eric to the ropes. As Eric rebounds, Bryce nails OBJ with a low blow, allowing Eric to drill him to the mat with an STO. Danny is on his feet and charges, but the Kings drop him with a double dropkick. Eric pounces on him for the cover, but again Taylor rolls a shoulder just in time.
The Kings drag Danny to his feet and send him into the corner. Eric sends his partner in after him, but Taylor dodges and Bryce slams into the turnbuckles. Taylor attacks, but the numbers (and Bryce’s brass knuckles) allow the Kings to quickly gain the advantage. They lift Taylor onto the top turnbuckle and climb up behind him. As they set up for a superplex, OBJ gets to his feet and lumbers to the corner. He gets underneath the Kings and drives them to the mat as they hit the move on Taylor. Everybody is down, and Barros starts to count.
OBJ is up first and drags Bryce to his feet He sends him to the ropes and follows a step behind him, slamming into him with a clothesline that sends him through the ropes to the floor. He goes to his partner and helps him to his feet. Eric gets up unsteadily, and Jack hits an inverted atomic drop. OBJ goes to the ropes behind him as Danny gets a running start - Call of the Wild! Taylor falls on Eric and hooks the leg. Barros counts One…Two…Bryce is back on the apron, but OBJ dives through the ropes, spearing him off the apron and driving him into the ringside barrier…Three.
WINNERS, in 14:01, Drink and Destroy.