OOWF MidWeek Mayhem (09/07) Live! From Juneau, Ala

[BookerShark]

*Eric O'Mac is seen chatting with AA in the hallway. AA lifts up his briefcase.*

AA: So, when are you going to unlock this?

Eric: When the time is right man. You've still got a job to do.

AA: The money better be good.

Eric: Oh, it will be. Here's another $100 to keep your mind set on the big prize.

*Eric hands AA a crisp Benjamin.*

AA: That'll do.

*AA starts to walk off.*

Eric: You aren't getting anymore money this week, so don't waste it all on better the NFL Lines this weekend.

AA: Don't worry, just a small bet here, maybe another one here, and I'll turn this $100 into $1000 in no time.

*AA leaves the frame just as Lauren Phoenix walks in.*

Lauren: He's just clueless sometimes, isn't he?

Eric: Yeah, but he's good people. Me, him, and Johnny use to run roughshed over this company.

Lauren: No you didn't.

Eric: No, but we should have. Not sure why we didn't.

Lauren: Interested in your match this week?

Eric: I wasn't interested last week and I won. I think maybe that strategy works again.

Lauren: You're teaming with Alex.

Eric: Oh. In that case, it might be fun to show the fans what could have been if me and him had remained a team and he didn't throw it all away for Firewoman.

Lauren: When are you going to let that go? You're becoming Moose-like with your irrational hatred.

Eric: No I'm not.

Lauren: No, you're not, but still, how long does this go on?

Eric: It ends when I've taken everything out of Alexander's life that is dear to him. His wife. His family. His title. It doesn't have to be in that order either. I can take his title, take out his wife and his family whenever it occurs. But I want Alex to realize that while he has all right now...it won't last, simply because he made a mistake. When I've accomplish that, then I'll let it go. Not until then. But as for this week?

...let's kick some tail, Alex. You can be the Boy Wonder, just as long as you keep in mind that I'm the way...

...the truth...

...and The White Knight.

*Fade*

[BookerShark]

FADE in on a street in Whitehorse, Yukon Territory, Canada. A Royal Canadian Mounted Police officer is standing on a street corner. DDT Ironman Heavy Metal Champion, Comrade Sharkoff, appears to be arguing with the RCMP.

CS: “Capitalist swine! I heard that GM al’Takriti is here! I demand to be put into a match tonight!”

RCMP: “For the last time, sir, the subdivision of Takhini is just over that hill. I do not know aboot anyone named al’Takriti, eh?”

CS: “Yankee dog! Russia number one! CCCP number one!”

RCMP: “I’m not a Yankee, eh? I’m Candaian. Ya know, like Celene Dion.”

CS: “(unintelligible Russian), Mountie!”

RCMP: “Eh?”

A voice from behind Comrade Sharkoff is heard.

V: “This gentleman bothering you, officer?”

Both men turn to look at The Crusher Stan Fulton. Standing next to him is his attaché, Martha Rodriguez.

RCMP: “No sir. Ma’am. Just move along, please.”

SF: “Sorry to interrupt, but I was wondering if you could direct us to the Takhini Arena. There’s a wrestling event there tonight.”

CS: “You! You’re the one that cost me my leg! Curse you capitalist swine! Russia number one!”

SF: “Yeah, about that. I’m sorry, but that was during my ran-out-of-my-meds phase. I don’t normally get that angry anymore.”

CS: “I’ll kill you, American dog!”

At this, Sharkoff takes his artificial leg off and leaps at Fulton. However, because he’s on one leg his instability causes him to crash into Rodriguez, knocking her to the ground. Fulton quickly turns to help her up. As he does, he turns and looks at Sharkoff with unbridled rage.

Before he can do anything, however, the RCMP shoves a cattle prod into the stomach of Sharkoff and turns it on.

CS: “AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!”

Sharkoff falls to the ground, twitching. Fulton looks at Rodriguez.

MR: “I’m okay. Go get it. Asswipes like him don’t deserve titles.”

Fulton covers Sharkoff and the RCMP drops and makes the count.

RCMP: “One! Two! Three! Ring the bell! The winner and NNNNNNNEEEEEWWWWWWWW DDT Ironman Heavy Metal Champion, The Crusher Stan Fulton!”

Fulton stands up at the RCMP hands him the championship belt.

SF: “Thank you, sir.”

RCMP: “My pleasure. I remember coming down to Minnesota one night with my son and watching you wrestle early in your career. You won the Northern Minnesota Wrestling Association heavyweight title that night.”

SF: “I remember that night. I defeated Fred “Ironhead” Johnson in two out of three falls.”

RCMP: “Right. He busted you open in the second fall and you spent the third just wiping blood out of your eyes.”

SF: “I know. I remember spending most of that last fall stumbling around the ring trying to see. I think I charged the wrong corner three times before I finally found him.”

RCMP: “Great match. My son and I still talk about that night.”

SF: “You traveled all the way from Whitehorse to Duluth?”

RCMP: “No. I was working out of Thunder Bay back then.”

SF: “How’d you and your son like to come to tonight’s show. My guest.”

RCMP: “We can’t take gratuities, sir.”

SF: “How ‘bout this. I leave the tickets in your son’s name and he can bring whom he wants.”

Fulton says this with a big shit-eating grin.

RCMP: “Agreed. And thanks, eh.”

SF: “My pleasure. Martha will take your son’s information down. The tickets will be at Will Call.”

Fulton walks over to the prone Sharkoff as Rodriguez gets the RCMP’s information.

SF: “Sharkoff, I don’t know why you keep sticking your nose into OOWF business. Go back to the PHWF and stay there. The next time I see you here in the OOWF I’m going to rip your other leg off and cram it so far up your ass, you’re going to get Athlete’s Foot on your brain. You knocked over a woman who’s not even a wrestler. I don’t think anyone in the OOWF would begrudge me the opportunity to end you for that. But you got lucky that Mountie was here. Don’t let there be a next time.”

Fulton stands, puts the DDT Ironman Heavy Metal Championship belt into his luggage and he and Rodriguez head to Takhini Arena as we FADE.

[BookerShark]

Firewoman is PUNCHING~! the holy hell out of the heavy bag. Lucky comes to see her.

L: So boss, I need--

FW: Whatever, sign it yourself. I'm off commissioner duty.

She continues to punch but is muttering under her breath.

L: So....therapy?

FW: Dr. Sid seems to think that if I'm going to take my aggressions out on inanimate objects, they ought to at LEAST be objects made for that purpose.

L: Not Lexie's iPad.

FW: Right. Not Lexie's iPad.

L: So......who's face is on that.

FW: It's a rotating list. First, there's Ecosystem, who is fucking back. He kidnaps, cannibalizes, attacks, maims, drugs, abuses, and mindfucks the whole promotion, and he gets a spot on the roster. He breaks his OWN SISTER'S ANKLE, and Selena says "Sure, sign here, welcome back."

L: I figured his presence would give you a set-back.

FW: Set-back. That's a good word for it. He does all that......I have to get continued verification of my compliance with mental health treatment regimens to keep my jobs, but he gets to just waltz back in. I swear if he does anything even remotely crazy, and he will, I WILL be responsible for what happens next.

L: Don't you mean you WON'T be?

FW: No, Lucky....I meant what I said....

L: Oh....

FW: And even though she's not been nearly as annoying lately, you can put Selena's face on here too. First she signs Attitude Adjuster, who's being paid by Eric to end my career, for reasons I still don't get, AND she puts him as a tag team partner with my husband, and then she signs the one person who almost did it.

L: I'm growing a little concerned now, Fire....I mean.....You keep saying he's not going to succeed, but what do you really mean?

FW: When have I ever not meant what I said, Lucky? He's not taking me out, not without one hell of a fight. And if he does, I'm taking him with me. End of story.

L: See, it's that last bit that has me worried. You said kind of the same thing about Tytan and.......

Lucky's voice trails off as Fire continues to work the heavy bag, totally focused. Finally she finishes up with one large punch that shakes the support beam.

FW: Worried my death wish is back? It hasn't actually left, Lucky. It's been beaten into the background by medications, cognitive adjustments, and Skype psychotherapy sessions. But it's still there. It will always be there. Even if I don't want it.

L: Fire...

FW: Don't, Lucky. Don't go calling Dr. Freedman, or even worse, calling Alex....I'm fine. If AA gets into the ring with me, and triggers something? Oh well. Better his career than mine. Better both our careers than just mine too. Yeah, either of those totally sparkle with me.

[BookerShark]

AA goes looking for Eric O'Mac, finding him at Ric's Sandwich Shop.

RF: Wooooo! The Sandwich Man returns! My business is saved! You want a Poor Boy?!

AA: You making cracks about my financial situation, old man? Didn't Johnny and I beat you into retirement a few years ago?

RF: No-selling, sandwich-making, retired-wresting, non-participating-character-being, son-of-a-bitch! You can't retire me! I'm already retired!

AA: Damn...

Ron Simmons: Hey! No one uses that line unless I'm brought back.

AA: Sorry, Ron. It's habit. Ric, I can't afford a sandwich...unless Eric wants to pay for it. Eric?

EOM: I gave you $100 yesterday. what did you do with that?

AA: Ummm, well, ummm...

EOM: Yes?

AA (under his breath): The D-backs lost...

EOM: What?!

AA: Fine! The D-backs lost! You happy? Now can I have another $100?

EOM: And waste it again? Not a chance. By the time you take Firewoman out of wrestling, I'll have already paid you the bounty. When are you going to get that job finished anyway? I'm beginning to think I picked the wrong man. Maybe I should have called Johnny.

AA: I'll get the job done. I'm just taking my time so Fire can regret every last day she didn't just run away and retire before I end her career. Just shut up about bringing in the wrong guy, or maybe I'll take you out of wrestling!

EOM: Yeah, right. You were nothing but a clown when you were here before. The only reason you turned vicious is because you need the money.

AA: What?!? We use to run roughshed over this company!

Lauren Phoenix: No you didn't.

Eric: But we should have. I'm beginning to realize why we didn't.

AA: What's that supposed to mean?

EOM: It means if you don't get the job done soon, I'll bring someone else in here to do it. (Flips a $10 to Ric.) Now sit down, shut up and eat a sandwich. And beat the hell out of Firewoman tonight...or else.

[BookerShark]

*Moments Later*

Eric is returning to his locker room with Lauren Phoenix while AA is still stuffing his face with food. Attached to Eric's door is a note and a garment bag. The note reads...

If you want to play the role, wear the costume.

Lauren and Eric step into the locker room as Lauren unzips the bag and pulls out a pure white Batman costume.

Voice: I hope it's your size.

Eric and Lauren quickly turn towards the voice where Alexis and Alexander Darling are lounging on the couch with drink. Eric quickly reaches into his pocket...

Alexander: Put the brass knuckles away partner.

Alexis: Does he really think we bring gifts and would attack your partner tonight?

Alexander: Well, he has worked with a bunch of morons the last few months, including his new lapdog Alan. Speaking of, where is the piece of shit?

Eric says nothing and continues to stare at Alex.

Alexis: Cat got his tongue?

Alexander: Lauren, are you a cat or just a pussy for Eric?

Lauren: How dare...

Eric holds up his hand and stops Lauren...

Eric: What do you want Alex?

Alexander: What I want is simple...I want you to grow up.

Eric: Excuse me?

Alexander: You heard me. Grow the fuck up Eric. You continue to exist in this business thinking it's a game that you can play when you want and quit when you want. That you can float in and out; picking and choosing when you care and when you don't. Deciding who to roll with and who to stab in the back when it suits your whims.

Eric: And why can't I? Why do you think I'll ever listen to you again after what you did to me...

Alexander: That's what it all comes down to, doesn't it. This isn't about taking what I have. This has never been about you trying to save me from Fire or save me from whatever darkness you see coming. You can't look beyond our past and I get that. Believe me...I get that. You, Stank, Moose...all of you want to hold on to the past, hold on to who I used to be and use that to motivate you. Fine, I get that, but don't you dare fucking lie about it.

Eric: I do not lie. I am Eric O'Mac. I am the truth.

Alexander: No, Eric. You are not. You're just another wrestler trying to find that motivation to get what you truly want.

Alexis reaches into her very large bag and pulls out the OOWF World Heavyweight Championship Title.

Eric, we both know it's not about Fire. It's not about our failed friendship. It's about this. You want it and you think that by playing games with my family it will throw me off. You're wrong Eric because the only thing your games make me do is convince me that I will never let you get what you want. Once upon a time you were closer to me than my own blood brothers, but you threw it away to fight an unwinnable war. A war that left you broken and without allies when you returned. A war that left you with enemies behind every door. A war I would have fought at your side had you ever come to me and asked. But you chose to walk a different path and so, here we are.

Eric: Yes we are here and Alexander, my would-be brother, one day you will see that everything I've done has been for you. Think I'm playing all you want, I know the truth. Because I am the truth and I am the White Knight you need.

Alexander: Prove it. There's your outfit Eric. But you won't because the truth...the absolute truth is you don't care about me. You never have and I accept that. As long as you accept this one undeniable truth, I am Alexander Darling and well, you're just not.

The Darling twins get up and brush past Eric and Lauren as they walk out of his locker room...

*Fade*

[BookerShark]

www.youtube.com/watch?v=cj9_yW8tZxs

Random activity from the Destroyitarium.

Wally B King is in the background, dancing with several Sheilas.

Outback Jack is in the foreground, about to slam a beer, when Jack of the Hinterlands takes over.

JH: Tytan, I like fighting big men like you. You have so much blood to bleed.

*OBJ's eyes roll back up, and he drinks his beer*

[BookerShark]

OOWF MidWeek Mayhem
Live! From Whitehorse, Alaska

ECOSYSTEM vs. MIKE IKTUK

Iktuk looks terrified before the match even starts, and for good reason. This IS the same man who just shattered his sister’s ankle to keep her from wrestling. The bell rings and Eco charges across the ring and catches Iktuk with a knee to the midsection, then tosses him into the corner and catches him with several high kicks to the side of the head. As Iktuk staggers out of the corner, Eco bounds off the ropes and nearly decapitates him with a clothesline. Eco tosses the poor soul over the top rope to the floor, then grabs a chair and SLAMS it down repeatedly on his ankle. The referee tries to get him to stop, but Eco shoves the ref away and continues pummeling his ankle, likely breaking it. Security finally comes out and drags Eco away, in handcuffs while medical checks on the poor kid.
WINNER in 1:41 by disqualification – Mike Iktuk

TEXPRESS vs. HONCHO WILLIAMS & JW WESTGAARD

The two teams are introduced and shake hands. The bell rings and they tear into one another, but the match stays completely clean. They put on a clinic of back and forth wrestling, the youngster Honcho proving that he belongs in the ring with the measuring sticks. Honcho tries a superplex on Zane, but the big man holds on and sends Honcho to the mat. As the OOWF rookie gets to his fee, Zane KILLS him with a flying clothesline. Texpress keep Honcho from making the tag for several minutes and work him over. Finally Honcho makes the hot tag to Westgaard and he cleans house. Honcho falls to the floor in exhaustion. Westgaard tries to set up Zane for the ICE AUGER but he reverses it and holds JWW up for an ALABAMA SLAM, Zane reaches out and tags Madison, then PLANTS Westgaard, Madison follows that up with a flying leg drop, covers, and gets the one, two, three!
WINNERS in 20:11 – Texpress

After the match, the two teams shake hands and Honcho and Westgaard shake hands with Chad and Zane. The crowd roars their approval.

OUTBACK JACK (w/Danny Taylor) vs. TYTAN (w/LD Williams)

Tytan jumps Jack from behind and pummels him with punches in the corner, beating him to the mat. Tytan takes a few steps back and charges into the corner and tries for a knee to Jack’s face, but Jack moves out of the way and Tytan slams his knee into the turnbuckle. Jack spends the next few minutes working on Tytan’s knee, trying several times to get a submission win, but Tytan will not relent. Jack gets to his feet and waits for the BOOMERANG! LD says something from the outside and Jack turns to argue with him. Tytan attacks Jack from behind and lifts him for a TYTANDRIVER! Tytan floats over, grabbing his knee, and gets the one, two, THREE!
WINNER in 13:33 – Tytan

Tytan bails and limps up the back while Taylor helps Jack to his feet inside the ring. LD smirks and reminds Jack that they are 0-2 against Regicide.

FIREWOMAN vs. ATTITUDE ADJUSTER

Before Fire or AA are introduced, GM Selena comes to the top of the ramp and has a mic:

ok, so how many of you fans want to see Firewoman and AA wrestle in some boring, plain old wrestling match? <mild enthusiasm> That’s what I thought. Now, how many of you want to see Firewoman and AA wrestle in a STEEL CAGE MATCH! <crowd roars> Now THAT is what I am talking about! Ring guys, make it happen!

<an army of backstage hands race to the ring with parts of the cage and assemble the cage in record time while Selena stands back and watches>

FIREWOMAN vs. ATTITUDE ADJUSTER – Steel Cage Match

AA is out first and he stands there arguing point spreads with the referee. It seems like they are settling up on some kind of bet and the ref tried to short him, AA reaches into the ref’s pocket and takes out the rest of the money and stuffs it in his shorts. Fire is announced and sprints to the ring and goes right after AA. Fire spends the first ten minutes battering AA, leaving him a bloody mess. Fire plants AA on the mat and tries a BFE but AA pulls the referee into the way and Fire takes him out. AA reaches into his tights and grabs the wad of money……and the key to the cage! He lets himself out of the cage and grabs a wrench from under the ring, gets back into the ring and locks the door and proceeds to HAMMER Fire’s knees, ribs and head mercilessly. Fire is soon a bloody mess as well. Alex runs to the ring and tries to open the door, but it only makes AA hit her harder. Finally Alex starts climbing the cage and AA lets himself out of the cage and escapes to safety. Alex frantically calls for paramedics.
WINNER by disqualification in 15:07 – Firewoman

EL LOBO SANGRIENTO & PSYKLE vs. MOOSEHEAD JACK & J-P SPARXX

Lobo and Psykle don’t quite mesh in their tag team abilities, which allows Moose and Sparxx to take over the match. For some bizarre reason, Moose and Sparxx work very well together, keeping Lobo in the ring, cut off from his partner, and forcing him to take tremendous amounts of punishment. Sparxx gives Lobo the opening he needs when he tries a moonsault, but Lobo gets his knees up. Lobo finally makes the tag to Psykle, and Psykle cleans house. Moose comes back for more, but eats a boot to the face that sends him out of the ring. Psykle sets Sparxx on the top rope and sets him up for a PSYKLEDRIVER, but Sparxx catches him with a knee to the jaw that staggers the big man, and then Sparxx PLANTS him with a tornado DDT. Sparxx covers, but only gets two. Both men are up, Sparxx tries a spinning heel kick, but Lobo catches him and dumps him to the mat then tags in Lobo. Lobo tries an elbow drop, but Sparxx moves out of the way, and tags in Moose. Sparxx turns to leave the ring, but then charges at Lobo, catches him by the back of the head and guillotines him on the top rope, landing on top of Psykle on the outside. As Lobo staggers backward, Moose catches him, lifts him and hits the GO TO SLEEP FOREVER! Moose covers, hooking his leg hard and gets the one, two, THREE!
WINNERS in 17:54 – Moosehead Jack & J-P Sparxx

ALEXANDER DARLING & ERIC O’MAC vs. DAVIN MORELAND & STANK

Alex starts things off against Stank, and Stank comes at him hard. Alex holds his own, and even manages to drop Stank with a hard left to the jaw. Alex turns to tag in Eric, and Eric moves to tag in, then grabs his leg in pain and falls off the mat to the floor. Alex yells at him and asks what the hell he is doing, but Eric makes the dreaded “X” sign, and medics come to ringside to help him to the back. This leaves it essentially a handicap match, and while Alex may be good, he is no match for Stank and Davin. They decimate the champion, and despite attempts by Alex to fight back, he can’t overcome the odds, and Stank pins him after a RGDC followed by a STANKONIA 2.0!
WINNERS in 24:14 – Davin Moreland & Stank

After the match, Eric races to the ring to try and “save” his partner. A bloodied and battered Alex glares at Eric as he laughs and leaves the ring.

STAN FULTON vs. CHRIS EVANS – Non-Title No-Disqualification Falls Count Anywhere Match

Fulton comes to the ring with his trusty axe handle and waits in the corner for Evans. The Intercontinental champion is announced and sprints to the ring, slides under the bottom rope, and even though his opponent had a friggin AXE HANDLE in his hands, Evans goes right after him. The two of them tear into one another, and in pretty short order, they are both bloody messes. Evans nearly gets the win when he puts Fulton on a table and hits a leg drop, driving Fulton through the table to the floor. Fulton nearly gets the win when he puts Evans on the Filipino Announce Table and hits a DRAGLINE from the APRON! Evans may have been nearly dead, but not dead enough to stay down for three. The match continues on at a brutal pace for over a half an hour. Finally the end comes when Fulton tries to avalanche against the ring post, but Evans moves out of the way and Fulton slams face first into the steel. As he staggers backward, Evans DRIVES him to the cement with a neck breaker, crawls over to Fulton and drapes an arm across his chest and gets the blood soaked one, two, three.
WINNER in 33:11 – Chris Evans

Thanks for coming out and watching LIVE OOWF action! Be sure to check out the OOWF Hell on Earth 7, Live! September 25st from Dayton, Ohio. And don’t forget to catch next week’s OOWF Mid-Week Mayhem, September 14th, live from Saskatoon, Saskatchewan

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