OOWF Mid-Week Mayhem (12/7) Live! from Hunts Harbo

[BookerShark]

OOWF Mid-Week Mayhem
Live! from Hunts Harbour, Labrador, Canada

--

Backstage, Lucky is pacing around nervously. Paul Roma notices and comes over.

PR: Hey Lucky, what's up?

L: There's no lineup.

PR: No? Why not?

L: Have you seen Selena?

PR: Madam General Manager? I-

L: Have you seen Firewoman?

PR: The Comm-

L: Have you seen Firewoman's Flask?

PR: No. Why are you-

L: Oh boy. Paul, you gotta help me find them.

Lineup subject to change, due to the fact that MOOSE DIDN'T GIVE ME ONE TO POST, JERK-ASS!

[BookerShark]

OOWF MidWeek Mayhem
Live! From Hants Harbor, Labrador Canada

Intercontinental Title Match[/u]
Chris Evans vs. El Lobo Sangriento

Non-Title Match[/u]
Stan Fulton vs. Outback Jack

Non-Title Match[/u]
The Flyin Hawaiians vs. Ricky Soaring Eagle & Psykle

Non-Title Match[/u]
JP Sparxx vs. Rabbit Mask

Matt Folz vs. LD Williams
Texpress vs. Davin Moreland & Stank
Saints of Sinners vs. The Darlings
Comrade Sharkoff vs. Attitude Adjuster
Eric O'Mac vs. Firewoman vs. Ghosthead

Card subject to - seriously, tell me ONE thing about Labrador (non-Canadians only)

[BookerShark]

Matt Folz is scene outside the arena heading to get something from his rental car, when he comes across some unexpected opposition. Is it Drink and Destroy seeking revenge? Is it LD looking to soften him up before there match? Is it Moose and Eco on another random violence kick? No, It's the one and only JUSTIN SANE! Justin eyes Folz, who just kind of sighs.

Folz: Go away Justin, I don't have five bucks right now.

Justin: I'm not here for money, you have my belt, and I'm getting it back now. Doughawk!

With that Justin runs and makes a flying leap at Folz......and misses by a mile, landing in a nearby trash bin that slams shut on him. Folz just flips the DDT belt over his shoulder and stares at the closed bin.

Folz: Why do you even want this thing, it's ugly as all get out, holds no real value, and is basically just a giant jo....

Folz's words are cut off as he starts to grimace in pain, the camera pans back and we see Victor Deniro standing behind him with a stun gun pressed into his ribs. Folz recovers enough to take a backwards swing that Vic barely avoids.

Folz: You are going to pay for that you little shi....

Folz is cut short, as Vic nails him with a full on kick to his sensitive man parts. This causes Folz to double forward, and Vic plants the stun gun in his neck and pulls the trigger again. Folz hits the ground, semi conscious. Vic leans down and whispers near his ears, but the INC are on there game, and we pick up every word.

DVD: I know you can here me. I have a message I want you to give to those chronic backstabbers the Hawaiians, that ungrateful little shit Sparxx, that stupid fat fuck Fulton, and especially your underwhelming leader Evans. Tell them that no matter how many titles they hold, or how powerful they think they are, no one is untouchable. See, Fulton was right, Me, Jack, Lobo, we all have darkness in us. Danny was the only truly good person among us, and thanks in part to your actions, he has been removed from the equation. So what is to stop us from giving in to the darkness now morons. Guess you didn't think that one through.

With that Vic heads off presumably towards the Destroyatorium, leaving the slowly recovering Folz behind. At this point the lid flies off the trashcan, and Justin attempts to get out of it. He of course fails miserably, catching his heel on the lip and in an unexpected bit of luck ends up pulling off a pretty decent swanton bomb onto the still prone Folz. An OOWF ref happens to be nearby and makes the three declaring your winner and new OOWF Ironman Heavymetal DDT champion Justin Sane.

Justin celebrates like he just won the superbowl.

Justin: I can't wait to show the boss, he is gonna love this.

Justin leaves as Folz finally begins to stir.

FADE

[BookerShark]

*Fade in to the Three-Gun Arena in Rivière-Trois-Pistoles, Quebec, where we find El Lobo Sangriento WATCHING~! the recent developments on OOWF-TV…

ELS: Well, well, well. Folz, you smug sonofabitch, I guess Vic got to you before I got my chance. Better this way, really. You just got your ass handed to you by a manager and a comedy act. Your pals in the New Guard are going to love that. Great for the brand.

ELS: And speaking of the New Guard, I see I’ve got the illustrious Chris Evans next week in a title match. Normally, Evans, I’d offer to save you the embarrassment of losing to me again and let you hand me the title and walk away. Given recent events, though, I really want this match.

ELS: See you in a week, Chris. Wolfpack out.

*FADE*

[BookerShark]

Matt Folz stands up, clutching his ribs but smiling.

MF: Nice job Vic, I truly didn't think you had it in you. But let me ask you something, what did you truly accomplish with that? Took away that meaningless title? Oh no, how will I ever survive without the most meaningless title in wrestling other than the WWE tag titles? This truly is the lowpoint of my career. Did you injure me? No. Did you send some sort of message? What, that anyone can be taken out at any time? No kidding. Look, I could retaliate. I could rip your head off literally without breaking a sweat. But quite frankly you aren't worth my time or even a minimal amount of effort.

Oh, and you had a few things wrong by the way. Chris isn't our leader because there is no 'leader' of the New Guard. I did most of the talking tonight, tomorrow it could be Chris, the next day it could be JP...... God knows he loves to talk.... the next week it could be Stan, Kai, or Aina. This isn't a clusterfuck of egos like Run DEA was, this is a collection of the 6 best wrestlers in the company all with common interests and all watching eachother's backs. And I'd love to see you call Chris worthless after he embarrasses your boy Lobo this Wednesday.

Now, moving on, this week I face LD Williams. The man who is, despite what those egotistical fucks Darling and Moreland think, the greatest pure wrestler in the history of this company. And the entire world will see why the New Guard is taking over when I whip his ass right in the middle of the ring. We are the New Guard and this is OUR time, and God have mercy on those who try to get in our way.

Folz gets in his car as we FADE.

[BookerShark]

*We fade in to Chris Evans, at Ric's Sandwich Shoppe, getting himself some dinner. He gets his healthy, salady, chickeny thing and probably a Vitamin Water or something. He hands Ric his debit card as he has a thousand times before.*

RF: WHOOOOO~! DE-CLINED, FAT BOY!

CE: The hell? Slide it again.

RF: *slides it again* DECLINE ME? I'M ALREADY DECLINED! PAY UP BEFORE I TAKE YOUR MOM TO SPACE MOUNTAIN WHOOOOOOO~!

CE: *looks embarrassed if anything* I don't know why that wouldn't...well, I have a handful of these goofy looking things.

RF: You give those to me? I'M GOD! GOD GOD GOD GOD GOD!

CE: They say Canada on them. They're probably money. How many do you want?

RF: SIXTEEN-TIME-

CE: 16? Sure. Why not. I've got like 25 of them. When am I going to need them?

*Evans hands him 16 Loonies and goes on about his evening. We then fade in to Kai and Aina w/ Noelani, who appear to be in some awesome club, at a table.*

TK: The Kai says, BRING US MORE CRISTAL!

N: Haven't you had enough already? We should probably get going.

TK: The Kai says, know your role, and SHUT YOUR MOUTH!

A: Noelani's right. And that's the bottom line...because AINA SAYS SO!

N: Check please!

*A waitress comes by with a check. Aina puts his debit card out, and she whisks it away. She comes back.*

W: I'm sorry sir. Do you have another form of payment?

A: The hell?

TK: The Kai has no time for Aina's foolishness. The Kai says, take The Kai's card....shine it up real nice...and SHOVE IT-

N: Stop it, Kai.

*Kai hands his card over. Waitress leaves. Waitress comes back.*

W: I'm sorry sir. Do you have ANOTHER form of payment?

*They both look at Noelani*

N: Like I brought my purse in this place?

A: Hey, don't you have those goofy coins? The ones that say "Canada" on them?

TK: The Kai has many of those coins in his pockets.

*between the two of them, they leave several hundred Loonies for one pissed-off looking waitress. We now fade in to J-P Sparxx, at a local ATM in a convenience store. Jewel is there too, on the phone*

J: I HEARD you the last time, fool. You'll only be there another 20 minutes! I know. Hurry it up, J-P.

JPS: Girl, I swear...*he tries his card several times. Several times it's "declined"* Uh...baby?

J: I'm coming! We on our way now! *covers the phone and whispers* What?

JPS: My card ain't workin'.

J: Your card ain't WHAT?

JPS: Workin'. It's broke n' shit.

J: Aw HELL nah. YOU broke n' shit. Where those chocolate things?

JPS: The coins that say "Canada"?

J: Yeah them.

JPS: In the renta car. I think we got like 50 of them or somethin.

J: A'ight. *uncovers the phone* Yo, all I gots is dem Canada coins...WHACHUMEAN You not gonna take coins? BITCH, I will CALL-....yeah....yeah...that's what I thought...yeah...deuces *she hangs up*

JPS: So?

J: Well let's GO! Weed man ain't gon be there all night. An' you gots ta get that card fixed.

*Fade out and then into World Heavyweight Champion Stan Fulton gassing up his Kia. Martha is there. Stan has run his card through several times at the pump, without success. He tries inside, and also with no success.*

WHCSF: Hey Martha, do you have any Canada coins left?

MR: The chocolate ones?

WHCSF: Yeah, this moron is going to trade them for gas.

MR: Why would you do that? Just pay him.

WHCSF: Card's not working.

MR: Ugh. Fine. Here's like 30 of them. What a maroon.

WHCSF: I can't believe we're working in this shithole.

*Fade in to Matt Folz, in a video store, trying to buy a DVD of "The Best of William Regal". He's given several cards to the cashier, none of them work. The cashier hears the jingling of Loonies and mentions it*

C: Hey, we take those too.

MF: These things that say "Canada" on them?

C: Yeah. Do you have 6 of them?

MF: *checks* I have exactly 6.

C: Well then I'll take them.

MF: And I get the DVD?

C: That's how a transaction works.

*He hands over the Loonies and then heads back to the arena to watch the DVD. Outside the door, there is a FedEx Envelope. He opens it. It reads:

Mr. Matt Folz or His Power of Attorney. You are hereby notified that all financial accounts, including but not limited to: bank accounts, credit cards, mutual fund, stocks, bonds, security deposit boxes, and property owned and leased that are owned, operated, in possession of, or in any way linked to the members of "The New Guard" are FROZEN immediately due to the order of the Honorable Judge Harold T. Stone, under the auspices of the USA PATRIOT ACT and the [/b]HOMELAND SECURITY ACT.[/b] To wit: any crime, civil or criminal, transacted over international borders. You have been charged with "Intentional infringement of a trademark or copyright", and are to appear in front of Harold T. Stone's Court in Barnstable, MA at 9 AM, December the 6th, the year of our Lord Two Thousand and Eleven. Signed, "Diamond Dallas" Page J. Falkinburg Jr. - Clerk of Courts, County of Barnstable, Commonwealth of Massachusetts, United States of America[/i]

He also notices there is a card of some kind. A rooster, as he opens it, and it says "Cock a doodle doo" when the card is opened. In Sharpie at the bottom is a single word:




"Motherfucker"


Folz is infuriated and hums the card across the room, doing nothing because it's just a card. He clearly wants to break something, but there's nothing to break. All he can do is read the card aloud.*

MF: MOTHERFUCKER!

*fade*

[BookerShark]

*Stank is in the back having finished watching Matt Folz show ending promo.*

Stank - Wow Matt. Glad you found your voice. Really I am. Chris, J-P, Crusher, Hawaiians. I'm really, really, happy you douchebags have FINALLY done something with the New Guard. Just two corrections Matt. The Five HAVE done it, and did it better than you fools ever could. RunDEA did it before that.

Just a short note for anyone paying attention.

I have made a career in the OOWF out of destroying factions like yours.

Not by burying anyone, but by beating motherfuckers. That's what I do. I beat motherfuckers.

Evans stepped up to the plate and fell short. Not because I buried him, because I BEAT him CLEAN.

J-P Sparxx stepped up. Got a win on me but I got him back. Didn't bury him I just beat him CLEAN.

Crusher? Stan you dissappoint me. You throw your lot in with this group? Seriously? What did you want us to do? Me, Moose, LD, Tytan what exactly were we supposed to do to make you happy? Huh? Hold your hand? I recall you winning multiple titles when you hung with us. Sure you got the big strap all on your own... oh wait Davin helped you with that didn't he? I don't understand. Not one of us held you back. When I was World champ you got your title opportunity and... oh yeah I beat you... clean. I didn't bury you.

Hawaiians... what can I say about The Flying Hawaiians... ... ... bad move. Your little series with Texpress was putting you on the map. I cheered for you. It's no secret I don't like Texpress. You guys beat them and I congratulate you. Problem is you've joined up with a bunch of whiny bitches who fail to understand the difference between victory and stupidity. I honestly can't recall a single match you two and I have been in together, but I know this... neither one of you clowns have beaten me.

and... Matt the glorified mercenary turned mute, turned yakity yak, turned misguided asshole. You haven't even stayed around long enough for anyone to bury you. Davin Moreland came at you like it was me all over again. Most motherfuckers would have slinked away under that kind of abuse, but you held your own for awhile and I admired that... then you proved that you were indeed like most motherfuckers and slinked away... but you've come back strong Matty I got to hand it to you. But you sure as fuck haven't beaten me.

Who gives a goddamn if you beat other motherfuckers clean on your way to winning your titles? In the end it's about who you are... and none of you would be ANYBODY in the OOWF if it wasn't for us... Davin Moreland, LD Williams, Alexander Darling, Texpress, Moosehead Jack, Eric O'Mac, Outback Jack and others and others who were here before.

Now, you want to call me out... fine. You want to throw out big names and try to make a career at their expense?

Well guess what? It just so happens I got nothing better to do since I can't compete for a title for another sixty odd days.

I was content on leaving it to LD or Drink and Destroy to handle you boys, but you asked for it by name... and now the asswhoopins will commence. You think I'm past my prime?

Come try me.

That's right... you bitches have just given me something to do. Something I'm good at... I destroy factions. Just ask Three Piece Set and The Heroes Guild how they're doing? Ask RunDEA what it was like to come up against me and mine... and THIS time, me and mine... we ain't the "Old Guard" to your "New". No morons...

We're The Establishment.

And you're in for a rude awakening to world of hurt.

Don't believe me?

Fade

[BookerShark]

Cut to Matt Folz stomping angrily around his hotel room, muttering angrily to Jaime McAllister.

MF: Motherfucker is actually arrogant enough to think he invented the goddamn concept of a top 10 list?

JM: Hon, relax. I've already called your lawyer, nothing he can do until the morning. Why don't you just relax and watch your dvd, ok?

Folz shrugs and turns on the tv, preparing to watch his Best of William Regal DVD (OOC: Nice touch Tommy, I'd SO fucking watch that). Stopping as he see's Stanks promo playing on OOWFtv.

MF: Stank, I'll make this short. We welcome you wanting to take us on. I'm busy this week with your associate Mr Williams, but anytime any place you want a match I'll be happy to embarass you much like I'm going to do to him this week.

Fade

[BookerShark]

*Davin happens into the gym. Stank is there finishing up. Mutual nod of acknowledgement, and Davin tosses him a water*

S: You're my waterboy, now?

DM: Who you callin' "boy"?

S: *smiling* Clever, douchebag. So what brings you by here at this hour?

DM: Thought I'd get a little work in before Mickie woke up for, well, not dinner, not breakfast...are they still calling it "4th meal"? She eats like 10 meals. Anyway, I'm going to be awake. That's the point of the story.

S: And how is your mini-me?

DM: God, don't curse her with that. But, she's great. I'm pretty sure she's walking and talking already.

S: She's like 4 months old.

DM: Ok, maybe I'm overstating it. I think she knows who I am now. So that's cool.

S: It is.

DM: How's your brother?

S: Next question.

DM: Ok. How do you feel about Matt Folz thinking that a phone call is going to get him and his boys out of anything to do with the USA PATRIOT Act?

S: I think he's a fucking moron. Then again, I said as much in a promo before.

DM: I liked what you said about not being the "Old Guard" though.

S: You did?

DM: Fuck yeah. I'm not old. Neither are you. If we were in WWE we'd be considered up-and-comers. If we were in TNA we'd be on Explosion, or jobbing to Robbie E.

S: Good. Cause you know, you had me worried with all that retirement stuff a while back. And even recently.

DM: I could say the same for you.

S: You could. But how could I pass up the opportunity to tag with you?

DM: Pretty easily?

S: True. I was just being cordial.

DM: Of course. The Greatest Tag Team In The History Of Ever is nothing to joke about though.

S: We need to work on that name.

DM: We need to work on a lot of things.

S: Like what?

DM: Like making sure these people we work with understand what makes a viable group in this business.

S: Oh. Do you know?

DM: I do. So do you.

S: I do?

DM: You said so.

S: ...

DM: ...

S: When?

DM: In your promo.

S: ...

DM: Step 1: Establish Power.

S: *smiling* Step 2: Establish Dominance.

DM: You know the rest.

S: Later Davin.

*Stank leaves as Davin starts with some free weights and we fade*

[BookerShark]

The same backstage reporter finds Ricky Soaring Eagle down a dead-end hallway, sitting indian style (can we still call it that?) eyes closed, apparently meditating She approaches him quietly right as she leans in to speak to him, he speaks

"You are disturbing me."

"I'm sorry, I just needed to get a couple of sound bites from you about your upcoming title match"

Ricky openes his eyes and stands uncomfortably close

"As I understand it I am paired up with Psykle to face the Hawaiians. Psykle has proven to be a competant partner in destruction. He has the same thirst for pain I have.

As for our opponents. They are a good team. They have experience on their side. They are champions. But their focus seems to be on making a scene and 'shocking' people.

I am not here to make a scene. I am here to make an impact. If it takes the blood of a champion to get me noticed.. So be it."

[BookerShark]

Firewoman returns to the Darling Suites after getting her head examined.... from the chair shot.

AD: Are you okay? Sit down.

FW: Please...quit hovering. It's fine.

AD: They said you take many more chair shots to the head and--

FW: I got my hand up in time, I just have some stitches back there somewhere, that hurt like motherfucker because since when does local anesthetic not work on me?

AD: Side effects?

FW: Who knows, I'm about sick of these things

There's a knock on the door and Lucky answers it. Its Dashing Victor DeNiro.

FW: Oh no....Danny?

DVD: What? No, he's fine.....to be honest, Fire, I'm kind of surprised you didn't go see him yourself, although I appreciate the calls, and I'm sure he will too. I thought you guys had this kinda...thing...

FW: Um...

AD: Fire and hospitals ... not actually a good combination these days.

FW: Dr. Freedman calls it triggering.

DVD: Right...no, I get it. In fact, that's kinda what I came to see you about. In your role as Commissioner.

AD: I don't think now is a good time, she's just gotten stitches and--

FW: Please...go away. I'm fine.

AD: Whatever.

Alex goes not very far away, to the other side of the room. Lucky follows him after a look from Fire that also says go away. Fire gestures to Vic to have a seat and they both do.

FW: Whatcha need.

DVD: The attack on Danny...that was...that was beyond the scope of normal professional wrestling.

FW: Aye, it was...Drink?

DVD: Huh? Yeah, sure.

Fire pours a couple of glasses of whiskey for the two of them.

DVD: Ooo, that's good. Anyway...I know he's your brother...but....something has to be done. That wasn't part of a match that just got out of hand, that was a beating...and assault...and Fulton just aided and abetted.....

FW: So...what are you saying, Victor?

DVD: I'm saying they should be punished. And really punished. Stank levels of punishment, hell, even banned from the OOWF for life. I mean, after what happened to you last year...You've been the crusader since then against the mental games Ecosystem played with you, and really took it to Genius IQ...I gotta say, we don't see eye to eye on a lot, although maybe more than either of us first thought. I was damn glad to see you take him on and expose him for what he really is.

FW: Yeah...I still feel like there's something I'm missing there.

DVD: Regardless, you kept your word. You promised there would never be another case like that in the OOWF as long as you were here. But ... this thing with Danny...it's the same thing as your injury last year. I would think it should fall under the same rule.

Fire leans back in the couch, looks up at the ceiling, thinking.

FW: So...you want me to advocate to Selena and the Board to punish Moose and Fulton, and whoever else had a hand in Danny's injuries.

DVD: Yes...yes I do. The Board has listened to you before, and you're usually right about things, so....

Fire continues thinking.

FW: You see, that's interesting, Vic. Because I didn't see you coming in here, hat in hand, when LD took out Tytan a few months back.

DVD: No...well.....No, I didn't.

FW: And if we DO go all the way back to last year's "incident"...yes, as I review it in my mind.....Now, I'm a little fuzzy on things still, but the memories are slowly coming back ...I don't recall you barging into GMtheRick's office, demanding Something Must Be Done.

DVD: Well...both of those were in the contexts of matches, technically, and--

FW: Oh, c'mon Vic. We BOTH know a hit when we see one, don't we? In fact, this sympathy you have for Psykle...you knew I was being controlled, yet that didn't stop you from leading the charge to save me? No wait....to tase the fuck out of me.

DVD: Wow...

FW: I always tell people I have a long memory, especially when it comes to grudges.

DVD: Fine. Call me a hypocrite. Call me an asshole. Call me whatever you want....but Danny isn't like me or you, or any of the rest of us. If it were me lying there, I'd say you were within your rights to not do a damn thing. But he deserves better than what we give to each other.

FW: .........

DVD: .........

FW: I also have a long memory for kindnesses given...and Danny is one of the few people in my entire life who has been nothing but kind.

DVD: You'll talk to the board?

FW: I'll see what I can do. No promises, though. It's mostly out of my hands.

DVD: I understand. Thanks, Fire.

Victor gets up to leave, and Fire rises to see him out. Unexpectedly he turns and puts out his hand for her to shake it. She hesitates, and then accepts. They nod and Victor leaves. Fire looks at Alex and Lucky.

AD: Nicely done, Fire.

FW: Thanks...Lucky, what time is my conference call with Dr. Freedman?

L: Five minutes, Fire.

FW: Okay...thanks.

Fire goes into one of the other rooms and we FAAAAAAAAAADE.

[BookerShark]

CUT to the hotel suite of OOWF World Heavyweight Champion The Crusher Stan Fulton. He's with his attaché, Martha Rodriguez.

SF: (on phone) "Yes. I've read the whole thing... And I've spoken to The Privacy Commissioner of Canada's office. Since 115 Stat. 272, the USA Patriot Act, doesn't have any relevance to intellectual property, i.e. copyrights, trademarks or patents, Davin Moreland has no claim against J-P. In fact, the copyright database at the Canadian Intellectual Property Office doesn't have anything on record for a fraud top ten.

"Yes. After I had our funds unfrozen, I submitted a claim for 'Top Ten Frauds of the Week' with my Canadian attorneys on behalf of J-P Sparxx. He's the registered trademark holder of that phrase in Canada, Mexico and most of Europe. Davin will not be allowed to use it outside of the United States... They are the same ones I used to sue the OOWF a year or so ago... They're very good. In fact, I got to know a magistrate or two during that time and got one to sign the order to unfreeze our assets.

"No, that's not necessary. I worked with those attorneys to file a lawsuit with the Canada Revenue Office regarding false claims on personal income and assets. Mr. Moreland's attorney should be receiving those papers now. I don't expect they'll be able to do anything as filing that claim on Davin's behalf probably will get them disbarred.

"Mr. Moreland will have to pay a hefty fine and could get jail time. And I doubt his passport will allow him back into the country if he skips out of the jail. Davin Moreland, Fugitive. Has a nice ring to it. No. I made sure to file it against Davin's LLC. That way Samantha and Mickie won't be affected. More than Davin would do for us, but that's why I'm better than he is.

"I think that's it. Oh, one more thing actually. I've filed a trademark claim in both the U.S. and Canada for the phrase 'I can't believe we're working in this shithole.' Please make sure that's processed quickly. Thank you, Ronnie. You too."

Fulton hangs up.

MR: "So everything's back to normal?"

SF: "For us. Davin's going to have a hard time come the New Year getting back to the U.S."

MR: "Your prior lawsuit continues to pay dividends."

SF: "That and my paralegal background. Dude should know that even if a paralegal might not know all the laws and regulations, that paralegal knows a shitload of people who do. And will do plenty of pro bono work in exchange. Which reminds me. Send Ronnie a box of my new T-Shirts for her and her staff."

MR: "The ones that say OOWF World Heavyweight Champion The Crusher Stan Fulton on the front and 'I can't believe I work in this s***hole' on the back?"

SF: "That's the one. She'll get a kick out of her staff wearing them around the office."

MR: "She's good people."

SF: "As are we, Martha. As are we."

MR: "So you ready to promo?"

SF: "Legal affairs are taken care of. Let's do this."

A pristine banner with the latest OOWF logo unfurls behind Fulton. No more of that 'old school' crap.

SF: "In no particular order. Ms. Selena. You and I have had a good working relationship up until now. Please do not mistake Victor's pity party for anything more than it is. As wrestlers we all take a risk when we step in that ring that it could be our last moment on Earth. Hell, it's in our contracts that the OOWF will hold no liability in case of our death during an event. Because of falls-count-anywhere matches and the whatnot, it doesn't even specify 'in the ring.'

"Now having a manager attack a wrestler backstage? That's different. If anyone should be punished, it's Victor. But I'm not suggesting you do. Because we're better than him and his ilk. We're not going around half-cocked attacking people backstage. We're proving a point. Every one of the New Guard won their titles clean. If we lose them clean, so be it. That's not going to change what we're about. The title belts are just a fulcrum so our power can be better utilized.

"And Victor? 'Stupid fat fuck Fulton?' Oh my dear Lord! I never realized I was overweight! I shall not be able to go on with my life! Oh dear!

"Grow up, Vic. Namecalling and kicks to the testicles? You're what? 10? 14 maybe? As Matt said, you're not worth our time. You're not relevant and never will be. If I wanted to hurt you, I could have in the hospital. But all I did was talk to you. I back up what I say in the ring."

"Which brings me to one of the people you quote-unquote manage. Outback Jack. Jack, I'm only disappointed the World Title is not on the line. Because that might give me the motivation to give a damn about our match. I've said that on any given night any one on this roster could beat another. Hell, 99 times out of a hundred I'd beat Comrade Sharkoff with his own foot. But there's always that one time he could get lucky. And frankly, I don't care if I win or lose Wednesday night. I get paid either way and I get to put a beating on you. I realize I'm going to get a beating in return, but that's a small price to pay.

"Speaking of beatings, Stank, you say you're going to give me one. Fine. Bring it on, dude. I'm one of the few people in this company you're not going to be able to push around. And what did you or Moose ever give me? Cameos in your promos and promises that never materialized. I can at least say LD provided guidance and the opportunity to win the Campeonas de Trios titles. But when we lost, what happened? Tytan was dismissed from the company altogether and LD went off with Moose and then Davin and on and on and on. Did he ever ask me to team up for the tag titles? Nope. He got what he wanted and dumped Tytan and myself to the curb. And he was the most helpful of the three of you. I can at least respect LD. I have no such feelings for you or Moose. And Moose doesn't care.

"So that leaves you, big man. Yeah, Davin gave me a few ideas and I used them to win the World Heavyweight title. And in return I gave Davin two shots to win the title himself. Quid pro quo, buddy. You did jack-shit for me. You get bupkis. You're disappointed in me. Funny. I feel the same way about you. You didn't 'bury' me you say. I'd say you tried and failed. You and Moose and LD tried to keep me around so I'd think I was a part of your group and never challenge for your titles or take your spot to challenge for other wrestlers' titles. And it worked. When I was Intercontinental Champion, did I get my World title shot? No. You did, multiple times. And Eric O'Mac did. And LD Williams did. And Alex did. You were all just handed title shots. When Matt, Chris or J-P got their shot, they had to win their chance to get it. No silver platter for those now in the New Guard.

Did Stan Fulton, the IC champ and number one contender get a chance at that gold? No. Stank and LD and Alex get shots. I got non-title matches. And when you were Champ, at No Justice, No Peace, who was there helping you out by putting Alex through the floor? Me. If it wasn't for another old-timer, JW Westgaard, you'd still be Champ... because of me.

You have the gall to say we'd be nothing without you. Let me tell you something, big man. Contrary to what Davin may think, you're not the big time draw you used to be. You're not past your prime, but you're certainly on the downward slide to obscurity. We're all young and brash and our best years are in front of us. I'm more inclined to believe you'd be nothing without us. The OOWF would be nothing without us. Yes, guys like you and Davin and LD and Jack paved the way for us. Thanks. But like Triple H and The Undertaker and Jeff Jarrett and Sting, it's time for you to step aside for the next generation.

"We aren't asking for handouts. We took what we wanted and we did it ourselves. No more bookers keeping us down on behalf of their ol' chums. The days of the cliq are over.

"You were content to let LD and D&D handle it. More like you were too tired to grab your walker and participate. But they were making you look bad so you run your mouth about how we should fall on our knees and be thankful for the scraps you left us. Shoe's on the other foot now, Stank. You're going to have to be thankful for any scrap we leave you. Establishment. Phhhhhtttppp. Call the New Guard 'Occupy OOWF.' We're the 99% and you're being marginalized. Establish that.

"You want to prove you're more than just an ol' timer trying to hang onto his spot? Stop teaming up with Moose, with Davin, with LD. Try elevating one of the newer talent. Not once did you ever team with Stan Fulton.

"My final message is for our Commissioner. Firewoman, I applaud your willingness to be completely impartial and do what's best for the company. So I give you this free piece of advice. Which I'm sure you'll say you don't need. Tell Victor to take his complaint and shove it. Like you said, he didn't do anything when you were injured, why do anything about it now. Moose has taken chunks of flesh from more people on this roster than you can count and he got what? Two weeks? Let this one go. I'd hate to have to call in all my legal favors about discrimination and unfair business practices.

"Matt said it best. We are the New Guard and this is our time, and God have mercy on those who try to get in our way."

FADE

[BookerShark]

*Cut to the locker room of Stank after he has finished watching The OOWF World Champion's promo.*

Stank - Oh fuck you, Stan... where to begin?

Let's get a couple of things straight. I never said I was going to give you specifically a beating, not that I won't oblige, but the beatings weren't for you alone. Just so we're clear. Now... really? Really, Stan? Let me clue you in because I got a long memory.

End of Days 6, Invitational final four, You, me and your boys in the "New" Guard, J-P and Chris... we throwdown and I win the World Title.

The following Mayhem. Me and Sparky boy for the World Title... I beat him.

The following Mayhem. Me, YOU, and Sparxx for the World Title.... I beat you both.

Two weeks later.. Me and Psykle for the World Title... I beat him.

That was all within the first month of my second reign as World Champion that hadn't come to me for FOUR long years.

You see that shit wasn't HANDED to me. I earned it... and I beat motherfuckers to hold on to it. Not OLD GUARD motherfuckers, no... about half of you New Guard shits. It was a revolving door of New Guards that were put before me.

So what you're saying is I should've just lied down and HANDED the title to you, right Stan?

Fuck you. Why don't you hand your title over to Matt Folz?

You see I don't backstage polotic. I don't have the Board on speed dial. NOTHING was HANDED to me.

I'm a goddamn THREE TIME Wrestler of the Year, a Grand Slam Champion, The longest individual reigning World, and Intercontinental Champion. I've won the Tag Team titles more than anyone here in the OOWF, promos of the year, accolades up the yin yang, and NONE of that was HANDED to me. You know how all that shit happened? I didn't bitch and moan.

I KICKED ASS.

Davin Moreland calls you fat and you bitch and boo hoo and file a fucking lawsuit.

Davin Moreland called me fat and I KICKED HIS ASS! Sorry Davin but you know it's true. I'm just trying to illustrate a point to our World Champion here. Crusher you...

You whine.

I kick ass.

You bitch.

I. Kick. Ass.

Now. As for protecting my spot... fool please. I can't compete for a title for some time.

You've been near the upper card as a Onslaught and IC champ of the OOWF for most of your time here. You're now the World Champion, but you've been held back. Fuck you. You've had your opportunities even before I was World Champion, but you've been held back. Fuck you. What did you want us to do? What did you want me to do as far guidance? You were doing fine. You were hanging with the best the OOWF had to offer. Short of promoing for you and wrestling your matches, what the fuck did you expect?

A handout?

I will hang out with whom I damn well please, but if you want prove that you're more than an oversensitive spoiled brat, with an inflated sense of entitlement and self worth, then quit hanging with the New Guard.

Protecting my spot... my place is set in stone motherfucker. It don't need protecting cause you ain't anywhere close to it. That is a tall mountain to climb and you got about as long as it takes for me to stick my size fifteen boot up your ass to get part way there. So climb motherfucker. Climb.

You think I won't? You think you're one of the few? You vastly underestimate my ability to push, son.

I've beaten them all and I will beat more long after the New Guard has fallen by the wayside. I can do this at forty years old or a hundred, it doesn't matter. It's YOUR job to climb the mountain and knock me off my spot. It's not my job to simply jump off the cliff and hope someone makes it up there. So climb fool. Climb. And IF you get anywhere near the top. I will be there to kick your ass right back down to the bottom until YOU or any other New Guard can do something about it.

Don't believe me? Then you haven't been paying attention.

Fade

[BookerShark]

~~~ Zane and Chad are sitting in Firewoman's office ~~~

Zane: So that's it then?

Fire: I'm afraid so. Selena made it a Last Match, so there was no rematch clause built in. You can petition the Board if you want... you'd have my support... but they tend to be bottom-line oriented, and unwilling to get involved in wrestling decisions.

Chad: So that's it. It's like last summer all over again.

Zane: Not quite. We aren't out of the picture completely.

Fire: Exactly, just while The Hawaii'ans are champions. In the meantime, just win your matches and keep that record good, and you'll be in position for another shot when they lose them.

Chad: Not the best of prospects.

Zane: Well thanks for trying. We have a match to prep for.

Fire: Yeah... are you going to be ok with that?

Zane: Of course, it won't be the first time that we've been in the ring with Davin on the other side of it.

~~~ They head out the door and are heading down The Hallway (tm) to the Training Facility, when Chad stops dead in his tracks ~~~

Chad: I have an idea

Zane: Oh?

Chad: If I read the contract correctly, the Last Match stipulation dealt with tag team matches, correct?

Zane: Yes.

Chad: It didn't mention other type of matches, say a Trios match...

Zane: Nice. (He grabs his phone) Hi. Yeah I know listen........

~~~ Unfortunately, the Ninja cam doesn't pick up any of the conversation before we FADE ~~~

[BookerShark]

*Palatial New Guard Locker Room Suite*

The scene opens on a massive 10-room locker room suite that now holds the entire New Guard and their entire entourages. At the current moment however, all the members of the group are in the main room as they relax and are basically having a grand ole time. Matt and Stan are of course arguing about football. Evans is taking studious notes on Lobo. Noelani, Jewel, Martha, and Jaime are discussing sponsorships and other business arrangements. The Kai and JP are seemingly engaged in a Yo' Mama battle and Aina sits back at the bar and is enjoying himself a nice Mai Tai when he looks up and notices the door opening and two figures entering the locker room. The lead male figure is in black jeans and a black hoodie while the following female figure is in black leather pants and a black and red hoodie. She slams the door as she enters the room and that gets the attention of everyone else in the room.

Fulton: This isn't smart, even for someone as stupid as you.

Folz: 6 on 2 are really bad odds, ya know?

Sparxx: If it isn't the tomatahcan and his fine dimepiece sistah.

The attention turns to Evans...

Evans: What? If it was anyone important I'd get up and do something but it's just another washed up has been.

The two hooded figures look towards Kai and Aina...

Kai: I got nothing bad to say about you brah.

Aina: Are you looking for an explanation?

The male hooded figure just shakes his head.

Then what is it you want Alex?

Alex takes the hood off and looks around the room and takes in the looks of everyone in the room who clearly hates him along with the two men he does consider friends. He turns to look at Alexis and nods as she heads over to the bar and takes Aina's drink from him and downs it herself. Alexander heads over to the couch and takes a seat...

Alexander: So, the New Guard taking the world by storm.

Aina: Alex, brah, you're a friend but this isn't the place so say your peace and don't make this something it doesn't have to be.

Alexander: You're right Aina and I will make it quick.

Alexis makes her way over to her brother and sits on the edge of the couch next to him as she hands him a glass of bourbon and they clink glasses as the down the drinks.

When you guys made your big stand a few nights ago, I was otherwise occupied and didn't get the chance to see first-hand what you accomplished. But I have watched it on tape and I've taken the time the past few days to really keep an eye on you guys. I know most of you hate me. I also know I have some friends in this room and that's why this thing that some of you are trying to start with me, it's not gonna happen.

Evans finally looks up...

Evans: Oh, the almighty Alexander Darling has spoken and we should listen and heed your words right? Well, fuck you Darling. You don't get to dictate anything ever again...

Alexander: You six, you can attack me right now and show the world what happens when someone walks into the so-called lion's den. Or you can attack me when I start to walk out and show what kind of men the rest of the world thinks you are or you can be the men you keep saying you want to be and let me just say this.

Kai: The Kai will give you 5 more minutes.

Alexander: I applaud you guys. Sincerely. And that may not matter to you and I get that. But here's the thing, there are 2 men in this room closer to me than my own brothers and I'm not going to turn my back on them again. I did that once. I won't do it again and they've chosen to throw their lot in with you and I get that. I have no issues with any of you for what you did on Sunday and I know that's going to cause some problems for me backstage but so be it. You saw an opportunity and you grabbed it. That's what this business is about, but take this bit of advice whether you like me or hate me, watch what you say.

Folz: A warning from a man outnumbered 6 to 2 right now. Doesn't seem like the smartest move once again.

Alexander: Not a warning Matt. It's simple and as much as some of you want to revise history, I believe in what you guys are trying to accomplish. I stood for the same thing when I won my first world title, but you all seem to be forgetting that, so it is what it is. But here's the bottom line, you guys want to eliminate the Old Guard, the Establishment here in the OOWF...I want to eliminate Moosehead Jack and Ecosystem from the world. To me, it seems like those goals intersect right now.

Fulton: Are you seriously proposing an alignment?

Alexis: As much as you guys like to think we're stupid, we're not. It's very simple...you stay out of our way when it comes to Jack and Muyo, we won't get in your way.

Alexander: We've tried caring about the OOWF and it's allowed Moose to continue to be a cancer so it's time to let the OOWF care about itself while we take care of what needs to be done. Just remember, no one wins a war on multiple fronts. You have your front, we have ours.

Aina makes his way over to the Darlings...

Aina: I think we've heard enough for now.

Alexander: We cool?

Kai: The Kai is cool with the Darlings as long as the Darlings are cool with The Kai and his bruddah.

Alexis: Mahalo Kai. Mahala Aina.

The Darlings get up from the couch and pull the hoods back over their heads as they make their way out into the arena.

Sparxx: And we aren't kicking their ass right now why?

Evans & Aina: They're right...

Evans: ...For now.

*Fade*

[BookerShark]

So. This week I face the man they call Attitude Adjuster. Sharkoff has seen you wrestle before. You are no match for my Russian athletic superiority. You are no match for my Russian intelligence advantage. You are just another capitalist dog. You will feel the wrath of Mother Russia!

[BookerShark]

The scene comes up outside the Destroyatorium, where we see Chad Madison and Zane Meyers walking towards the entrance.

Chad: So you said Vic had something important to discuss with us?

Zane: Bridgette said he called and wanted to meet us now.

With that they enter the bar and are surprised to see LD as the only person present.

LD: Huh, not who I was expecting to see.

Zane: Us either.

The three men just sort of awkwardly stand around, when El Lobo enters the room.

El Lobo: Not that I'm complaining, but why are you all here?

Chad: Vic asked us to show.

LD: Ditto.

At this point, Outback Jack comes out from the back room.

OBJ: (belches) That's Australian for full house tonight.

Everyone kind of looks around waiting to see who shows up next when Ashley walks into the room.

Ashley: Woah, why the heck are all of you here?

El Lobo: I'm beginning to wonder that myself, but why are you so surprised to see us.

Ashley: Well, Vic just told me to get here quickly, and lock myself in to avoid retaliation.

El Lobo: Retaliation? From what, and where is Vic?

LD: My guess, about to do something really stupid.

We get a quick cut away to just outside the New Guard suites where we see a rather intense Victor Deniro stalking towards the suite, stun gun in hand. He is mere steps away from entering, when he hears a voice behind him.

voice: I wouldn't do that, it won't really accomplish anything.

Vic spins around expecting the worst, but instead finds himself face to face with Justin Sane.

DVD: Justin, I don't have time to deal with you right now, I have bigger fish to fry.

Justin: I still wouldn't do it, what do you think will happen if you go in there.

DVD: Ohh, I know they will take me down, but in the end (Vic holds up the stun gun) I will make them remember I was there.

Justin: Is that what Danny would want?

DVD: No, but I'm not Danny. Why do you care anyways.

Justin: (motioning towards the suite) Because like I told them, I'm kinda old guard myself. I know that a lot of guys think I'm just a comedy act, but look at the facts, I was in a very powerful tag team called Grounded in Reality, I am a former trios champ, Run DEA asked me to assist them in there endeavors, I am the permanent assistant to a legend like Stank, and I hold this. (Justin holds up the DDT title) Do you know how I was able to accomplish all this?

DVD: (sarcastically) You borrowed five dollars?

Justin: Heh, that's funny, but no, I did it by never giving into my emotions, I have fun, I joke, but I never give in to anger or hate or desire for revenge. I don't hang with Stank because I make him laugh, I hang with Stank, cause he knows I'm always paying attention, and waiting for just that right moment to make my move.

DVD: So what are you trying to say.

Justin: I'm saying, you can go in there, and maybe get in a few licks before you end up joining Danny in the hospital, or you can head back to the bar and convince all the various personalities you asked to assemble to put aside their differences to work together towards this common goal.

DVD: (looking confused) But I haven't asked anyone to go to the bar but Ashley.

Justin: (feigning innocence) Huh, well I guess someone must sound like you over the telephone.

Justin breaks out into a shit eating grin.

Justin: Now you go make your choice, me I have a main event DDT title defense against the hated ~LADDER~ at the house show to prepare for.

With that Justin walks off, leaving Vic standing alone. Vic eyes him for a moment, before looking back at the New Guard suite, he seems at war with himself, before dropping the stun gun to his side.

DVD: All right, we try it Danny's way.............for now.

FADE

[BookerShark]

Rabbit Mask is in his own locker room now, just him and his wife. Someone knocks on the door, and his wife gets up and looks through the peephole to see who it is.

W: It is a reporter with camera crew. I should let them in?

RM: Please do, yes. Thank you.

They enter and set up for an interview.

Reporter: Usagi, is your feud with Ricky Soaring Eagle over? He beat you at November Pain 4, and decisively at that.

RM: I believe there is still some unfinished business between us. He tried his best to make my life agonizing these past few weeks, and nearly succeeded in breaking me down. He was the better man at the PPV, and I will admit that. I am not unbeatable, I simply strive to be the best. There is a lot of great talent here in the OOWF, and I can not sign a contract one day, and then declare myself the best wrestler in the company the next. I must work my way up the ranks, and I must make up every loss I suffer with a win.

R: Speaking of great talent, you're scheduled to wrestle JP Sparxx on Wednesday.

RM: Yes, I am very excited for this. He is the Onslaught Champion, a title I am not unfamiliar with. I respect his abilities and am eager to work with him. I have been watching some highlight videos of him recently, as I am studying the current roster. It has changed quite a bit from the last time I was working here. He is very talented, and works a style similar to the one I worked years ago. He performs many of the same moves I once knew as standard. I am hoping we can steal the show on Wednesday.

R: You've recently been working a different style, stiffer and more grounded than the high-flying Sparxx does. Since you've moved away from that high-flying style, do you think he will catch you off-guard?

RM: Surely not. Without disrespect to him, I am still very versed in this style. Maybe he will force me to revert to that style for this match, but even then, I can deliver with stiff strikes and head drops to slow him down. One stiff spinning elbow can easily knock a man out, and JP Sparxx is no exception to this.

R: Now this match is non-title, so do you think winning will earn you a title shot later on?

RM: I have no expectations for my spot on cards. I will work my hardest to rise to the top, but realize this takes time. I hope to defeat him and show those running the show that I am capable of competing on the same level the champions here compete at. This will hopefully elevate me that much more, and bring me that much closer to a shot at a championship.

R: Just one last question. Your wife is very pretty, very small. But she looks like she knows how to take a man down, as we saw a few weeks ago when she single-handedly took down the monster that is Ricky Soaring Eagle. Does she have any experience with fighting or wrestling?

RM: Yes, my wife worked for the wrestling company I transferred to here from, in Japan. That is where we met, actually. She has since hung up the boots in order to practice her English and act as my manager here in the States.

R: So she's not planning on competing again any time soon?

RM: There are no plans for that any time soon, no. She is very much content watching me destroy my body while she continues to let hers heal, and I am content with this as well.

R: Ok, thank you very much. Good luck on Wednesday, we'll be watching.

RM: Yes, thank you. Take care.

Fade.

[BookerShark]

There's a knock on the door of the New Guard Palatial Locker room. They all look at each other, and finally Noelani gets annoyed and opens the door. Firewoman is standing there.

FW: Oh....is it fleet week again already?

Noelani charges, but Jewel holds her back. Fire merely smiles.

J: Easy, No-ee, she just tryin' to getcha t'do sumthin' to getcha thrown out.

FW: Ladies...A pleasure as always, but I'm not here to see you. May I come in?

J: Gimme one good reason I let your skank-ass in here.

FW: I sign your paychecks. Besides, I'm neutral in this latest version of dick-waving we have going on around here, and I would think you would want to keep it that way.

Jewel gives her a Maryse-esque claw, while Noelani rolls her eyes, but they both move away from the door.

FW: Thank you, ladies. A pleasure, as always.

Firewoman walks in and the rest of the New Guard watches her, but no one really stands up or anything because it's six on one.

FW: Howdy, boys. I need to talk to World Champion Fulton here. Alone.

MF: You gotta be kidding. You really think that we're going to leave him a lone with you.

FW: No, I know you're going to leave me alone with him. We have things to discuss that don't actually concern you.

CE: He's one of us, so it concerns us all.

FW: That's cute. Really. Now scram.

CE: And if we don't?

FW: *sitting down and making herself comfortable* I got all the time in the world.

SF: Fire, are you here as Commissioner Firewoman, Firewoman the wrestler, or Mrs. Darling. Because your husband was just here, so if this is about--

FW: Does it matter? I need to talk to you, and just you.

SF: Guys, just go on...it's fine.

Everyone sort of looks at each other, but with some encouragement from Crusher, they all slowly file out into the hall to...wherever. I imagine some of them are waiting outside in case of trouble.

SF: Okay, talk.

FW: First off....I have to say....thank you.

SF: Huh?

FW: As part of my therapy, Dr. Freedman and I are reviewing old OOWF recordings from...when I was....gone. And you stepped up....you offered to have Alex's back when he went after Tytan, and to do it yourself if need be, and....I thank you.

SF: Wow...that's...not what I was expecting.

FW: I know...me neither when I watched it. Its why I'm committed to staying out of all this New Guard/Establishment stuff, and I meant it when I said it, and I mean it now.

SF: Okay....so why are you here?

FW: To say it to your face, Stan. You see, I caught your bit of advice, and while I do appreciate it, it's part of my job as commissioner to take concerns of my wrestlers and their management to the board. That's all I'm doing, and I would do the same thing for anyone in this locker room.

SF: Uh huh...

FW: You're right. Victor didn't do anything for me. But this isn't about Victor, Stan. This is about Danny. And you can talk about 'in the ring' and 'dangerous business' all you want, but the fact of the matter is that the attack on Danny happened first of all from a wrestler that wasn't in the match, and wasn't even scheduled to be there, and then your little bit came after the bell rang, when the match was over. So you actually have very little to stand on here.

SF: So...

FW: And actually I do agree with you that other wrestlers have done much worse and gotten off with nothing, or slaps on their wrists. Hell, I'm one of them. But here's the thing. That doesn't make it any more right to let this go without at least a look-see, capiche? Especially when a look-see is requested.

SF: You go right ahead. I'll have the Ohio Athletic Commission down here so fast.

FW: Great! Great....bring Bernie on in. You know Bernie, right? Bernie Profato? Executive Director? Good guy, Bernie. Knows when to cut through the bullshit. We get along great. You know why?

SF: No, but I'm sure you're going to tell me.

FW: Because Bernie and I talk to each other. We don't make idle threats and send messages through lawyers and other silliness. No, when there's a problem, Bernie picks up the phone and calls me, and I him.

SF: We aren't in Ohio, Fire, we're in Canada.

FW: We are, and that would totally be relevant if our corporate headquarters were in Canada. But they aren't. They're in Dayton, Ohio.

SF: Doesn't matter, I can still file the complaint and--

FW: Yes yes, call in all your favors, whatever. Go ahead if that makes you happy. But I don't think it will, Stan. No, I think if you and I can just have these little face to faces, one on ones...that will solve a lot of problems. You know, be a man, and come talk to me like a man. Don't hide behind lawyers, Stan. You're better than that.

SF: I really thought this was going to go differently the way you started, but no, it's the same old bullshit.

FW: Look, I'm offering you a working relationship. I stay out of your feuds as long as things don't get too crazy obviously, and you just talk to me directly.

SF: Or else?

FW: There is no "or else," Stan. Although I probably shouldn't have to tell you what we do with lawyers where I come from, should I? Nor should I have to tell you what happens when someone makes an enemy of me.

SF: Heh, really? I saw you...you cowered from Ecosystem in the ring.

FW: *scowling* You're right...I have a ways to go with that. But I don't have any problems with you, Stan. You should maybe think about keeping it that way.

Fire gets up to leave.

FW: I will note your objections and points to the board when I present Victor's concerns. If you have any thing further, the door is always open. And once again...thanks for your support while I was....dead. I really won't ever forget it.

She turns and walks to the door.

SF: Nice big talk, Commish, but you can't tell me when to contact lawyers and when not to.

FW: Probably not, Stan, but ask yourself. You keep poking at me and making my life difficult, when all I'm trying to do is keep things fair? Ask yourself how many lawyers you think you'll need to hide behind, because I won't be calling any of my own. I'll take care of it myself.

Fire walks out and slams the door.

[BookerShark]

CUT to the locker room suite of the New Guard some time later where OOWF Onslaught Champion J-P Sparxx, Kai, one half of the OOWF World Tag Team Champions The Hawaiians and OOWF World Heavyweight Champion The Crusher Stan Fulton have been relaxing watching the promos come in.

JPS: “Dawg. That Stankopotomus sure ‘nuff pissy.”

SF: “I suppose I should respond.”

JPS: “Damn right.”

SF: “Stank. Calm down. You’re going to give yourself a stroke, ol’ timer.

“To get your facts straight.

“One, I never once claimed you should lay down and hand the title to me. Not. Once. I claimed you should have gone to whoever was GM and agreed that I deserved a shot. That’s it. A simple title match. Not lay down and give me the title. Because I believe I could have beaten you for it. And if I didn’t, I was going to learn something more for the next time. But there never was a next time. There was never a first time. You. Dodged. Me. End of point.

“Second, Davin has called me Fatty Fatty Fat Fat before, but that’s not why I filed suit against him. I filed suit against him to keep unsubstantiated claims and lawsuits from going forward. And because he tried to keep me and my employees from being able to feed and clothe ourselves.

“If you weren’t jumping up and down all tantrum-like you should know that a) these lawsuits never go to Court and b) Davin doesn’t give a rat’s ass and c) what the blue fuck does this have to do with you?

“Third. Inflated sense of entitlement?”

Fulton raises an eyebrow.

Kai: “Don’t be takin’ the Kai’s gimmicks, brah.”

Fulton smiles and holds up the OOWF World Heavyweight Championship belt.

SF: “I think I have irrefutable proof that I am entitled to this. I was before. And I will be from this point forward. The only thing the New Guard was entitled to before was a shot. And you and your buddies kept that from us. Well no more. Throw your tantrums all you want about you earning it. You did. Three time Wrestler of the Year. Grand Slam Champion. All that. Longest reigning, yadda yadda yadda.

“Ric Flair is a sixteen time World Champion.”

Flair pokes his head in the suite.

RF: “God! A Wrestling God! Whooooooo!”

Flair leaves.

SF: “But you know what? Someone is going to pass that number up. And soon. So the numbers don’t mean as much anymore. It’s all about the here and now, Stank. Not the has been and once was. Which is what you and Moose and Alex and Davin are. You kick ass. Great. So does just about everyone else here. It’s not original and not going to get you over. If that was the requirement for being on top, Psycle and Ricky Soaring Eagle would be the best in this company too.”

Kai: “Jabronis.”

SF: “And right here and right now I alone am the best in this company. Right now, Kai and Aina are the measuring stick of the tag team division.”

Kai: “The Hawaiians are the Most Electrifying Tag Team in Sports Entertainment!”

SF: “Right now, J-P is the best technical wrestler in the OOWF.”

JPS: “Damn straight, mutha.”

SF: “Right now, the New Guard hold all the power in the OOWF and you’re scared. I can tell from your promo. You’re worried your spot is in jeopardy.”

Kai: “The Kai is a big fan of Alex Trebeck.”

SF: “And I have been paying attention, Stank. So when you and your cliq is held back and doesn’t get the opportunities? You’ll see that I’ve been paying very close attention.”

JPS: “Knowwhathe’ssayin?”

SF: “Onto Alexander and Alexis.”

JPS: “One tomatah can and one fine can.”

Fulton gives J-P an eye roll.

JPS: “Wha? Man can window shop all he wants.”

SF: “Sure, when Jewel’s not around.”

JPS: “Whatevah, man.”

SF: “Anyway, Alex. I may believe you’re one of those quote-unquote Establishment people, but like Fire said I once offered to stand with you against Eco. And I can appreciate your calm, orderly argument for your position. I’m a very polite man myself. A true gentleman, if you will. Not that you’d know that from the picture other’s paint of me, but that’s neither here nor there.

“Now, the enemy of my enemy is not necessarily my friend in this case, but we certainly won’t stop you and your sister from taking Moose and Eco out. Our goals there coincide. But because you were so polite, I will give you this advance warning. When they’re gone, you’re fair game.”

“Finally to Firewoman. I’m sure you think I’m a bitter cranky whiner, but I’m actually very studious and meticulous.”

JPS: “What’s that?”

SF: “Detail oriented. Which is why the New Guard is going to run a whole lot smoother from here on. Between Martha and myself, the New Guard is going to hum along like a bullet train.

“Fire, I know the OOWF is a corporation registered in Ohio. Which, frankly, is kind of stupid knowing Delaware tax laws. But whatever. I’m disappointed you have decided to take a stand now. I personally am not concerned what the OOWF Board of Directors decides to do. They know what side of their bread is buttered.”

Kai: “Pie is better.”

SF: “I think they’d have a hard time suspending their World Champion or anyone else holding the gold right now. Stank got thirty days, but he hit a fan. I performed one wrestling move on a wrestler. We’ll be fine.

“I’m not poking you, Fire. I’m giving you advice. If that’s poking you, you need to, for lack of a better term, grow some.

“To everyone here, get one thing straight. We’re not going to go around attacking people backstage. Certainly not with stun guns. We’re going to go about our business of being the best in this business. And no one is going to keep us from doing that again.”

Fulton’s attaché, Martha Rodriguez, walks in the suite.

MR: “Stan, you have a three o’clock with the local media at something called Eepo’s Fun Mart.”

SF: “I can't believe we're working in this shithole.”

FADE

[BookerShark]

**Cut to a small arena, somewhere in Canada. A group of young wrestlers, male and female, are working out in around the ring. Walking among them, checking holds and offering pointers, is L.D. Williams. He walks a few rows into the stands, towards the camera. He gestures to the action behind him**

LDW: “My students. A little rough around the edges, but they’re making progress. Someday soon they’re gonna make their mark on the business, some of them in the OOWF."

**Williams sits in the stands, watching the action while still addressing the camera.**

"I decided to drop in and check on the school for a couple of reasons. Stank and Davin were here this morning and gave a master class because - let’s face it - what am I going to teach them about promos? More importantly, I needed a chance to clear my head. This New Guard stuff has me conflicted. When you look at the broad strokes, I kind of agree with what they’re doing. In fact, I suggested some of it.

Remember that Chris? Back in the Plus Two days I pulled you and Bryce aside and suggested that your best course would be to come after the Five, to try and take us down. Naturally, we would have stomped you, but even so, it would have made you famous - you could have won by losing.

Now here we are years later, and you’ve finally stepped up. Problem is, you overshot. You’re not the future anymore. Those kids down there are the future. The New Guard is the present. You are the OOWF. You’ve taken control, now what are you going to do with it?

It’s funny. You guys like to talk about time. It’s your time now. Our time has past. The Establisment is past it’s time. Well, you’re right about one thing - time is critical. For you. Guys like Davin, Stank, Outback Jack, Texpress, Me - we’ve already got a career’s worth of accomplishments. Davin likes to say he could retire tomorrow and be in the hall of fame the next day. It’s true. We have established our legacies. We can walk away any time we like and our place in history is secure.

You guys, on the other hand, you’ve got a giant clock over your heads. Sure, you earned everything you have. You deserve to be in the positions you’re in. But by banding together and declaring yourselves the rulers of the world, you’ve tied everything you’ve accomplished and everything you hope for to the New Guard - to each other. You have to beat us. You have to come out on top. You can't win by losing any more.

If the Five had collapsed a week after it formed, it wouldn’t have affected my legacy in the least.

If the New Guard blows it, that will be your legacy.

Now, the ultimate question is why do I care? Why am I trying to makke you prove yourselves? I know you think I’m trying to protect my spot, but the truth is there’s not a damn thing you can do that will ever overshadow what I’ve accomplished and even it you do manage to kick me down the card, I like curtain jerking.

No, the reason I care is those kids down there, and the ones that come after them. You know that stuff about the ring being my yard? This is part of that. What happens to this business if all you have to pass on to the next generation is ‘Whine until you get what you want and if that doesn’t work try whining to someone else?’

I think you have more than that in you. I hope you do.

Heaven help you if you don’t.

<fade>

[BookerShark]

*Justin Sane walks into Stank's locker room.*

JS - Sup Boss?

Stank - He didn't hear a gotdamn word I said.

JS - So why try?

Stank - Huh?

JS - Why try? People are going to believe what they want no matter what you say or do.

Stank - I'm sorry. I'm not used to you talking to me all lucid like.

JS - C'mon boss.

Stank - I'm sorry. You are a very competent assistant. I don't understand how you get done half the shit you do.

JS - Can I borrow five dollars?

Stank - Justin.

JS - Maybe later.

Stank - *rolls his eyes* Listen Justin the reason I try is that I have a low tolerance for ignorance. Take Stan Fulton for example. He thinks I'm talking about his most recent lawsuit when I was actually referring to the one he filed in the begining months of his career in the OOWF. Fact is Davin called him fat and he got all sensitive and filed a lawsuit. The fact that he doesn't know which lawsuit I'm talking about speaks volumes about what I mean about him.

JS - Well what does that have to do with you?

Stank - It has nothing to do with me. It has everything to do with him. I'm pointing out a difference between him and I. The fool thinks I ducked him? I don't book matches. I don't request them. It's not up to me who I face in the ring. Stan got his shot at me and lost. The fact that I didn't go to the GM and request he get a rematch does not mean I ducked him. Even if I had, do you honestly THINK Juni would have listened? I was in his administration and he didn't listen to me. Stan Fulton can kiss my ass. If I ducked him then he's ducking Davin Moreland and Eric O'Mac.

JS - Well... if I might offer an opinion.

Stank - Shoot.

JS - I think you're giving the New Guard more attention than they deserve from you.

Stank - It's what they wanted, right. Stan Fulton keeps calling me a has been. Better men than him have tried to bury me. Better men than him have tried to say my career is over and done. Stan has never beaten me and he talks shit? He thinks I'm trying to protect my spot. He talks about my relevance. Really? The man who struggled with gimmicks, desperate to get over, is talking shit about me? That's a joke. Just so you don't get it twisted Stan I'm saying your talking shit about me is a joke. Not you being the World Champion.

JS - Stan's not here.

Stank - He'll be watching.

JS - You have a match against Texpress. Maybe you should promo about them.

Stank - Just one more thing Justin... wait... what's that?

JS - What?

Stank - You won the DDT belt.

JS - Oh this old thing.

Stank - Congrats man... did you hit whoever you beat with the DougHawk~!

JS - Let's not talk about that. You were saying?

Stank - Why wha-

JS -

Stank - Okay.

*Stank turns toward the camera.*

Stank - Stan I don't want to get any further into a tit for tat with you, but if you think for ONE second I ever felt you didn't deserve a title match with me then you never knew me. LD is going to be nice about it, but I ain't nice. You prove yourself to be the clueless ignoramous I think you are every time you speak about me and you. If you had been paying any attention you would know that I. Duck. no. one.

Motherfuckers duck me.

Now since you are so fond of the practice, why don't you take your ass over to Selena's office and request a match with me? No. No. I, unlike you, don't expect the The World Champion to concern himself with such matters. So I'll do you a favor. I'll head over there right after I'm done and ask Selena for the match, non-title of course. Unless you're scared to face me. That's understandable. You'll probably dismiss the idea as some desperate move on my part to stay relevant, which again is a fucking joke coming from you.

Go ahead and listen to Alex then. Of course that motherfucker is sympathetic to your cause because he did the same shit. The Five were the best and when he became Champ his first act was to declare he would not defend against those of us who had already been World Champs. He called it putting the "held down" over. He tried to paint that shit as noble. It wasn't noble. It was arrogant and it was cowardly. I don't mind arrogance. I don't abide cowardice. The two in combination though makes me sick. That's what this New Guard seems to be about. Same shit different day. LD is right you've overplayed your hand. You overshot the mark. Now everything you are is tied into The New Guard and when, not if, when you blow it... when you get brought down... that will be your legacy. A busted misguided dream... don't believe me?

Let's talk about Texpress.

Arrogance in abundance and they can back it up. They however, unlike that New Guard crew, are not cowards. I could never accuse them of that. They are two motherfuckers that I don't like, though. I respect the hell of them, but I can't stand them. My feelings on them can be summed up in one name.

Rick Perry.

That's right. Rick motherfuckin Perry.

For that alone Texpress are going down. And lucky for me, my tag team partner has recently let his philosophical differences with one Chad Madison be known in a very hostile way. There was a time that I would be concerned about stepping into the ring with RunDLP by myself, but now the LP face The Greatest Tag Team to ever... well we really got to work on that name.

JS - How about The Establishment?

Stank - You know when I called us that I hadn't really cleared it with Moose or Juni at the time... plus I was thinking more macro than simply Davin and me. Plus I can't stand Juni and I don't know what the fuck is going on in the head of Moose. Plus-

JS - How about The New Original Classic New Establishment 2000?

Stank - That doesn't help. I mean "New"? There's already the "New" Guard. I wouldn't want Stan to get all pissy and sue us.

JS - Weren't you on a team called The New Original Classic New Blackjacks 2000?

Stank - Oh yeah...? Get my lawyer on the phone.

JS - On it.

*Sane leaves.*

Stank - Anyway... Texpress you face me and Davin Moreland. We're pissed off and more importantly, unstoppable as a Tag Team.

JS - I'm back.

Stank - Damn that was quick.

JS - Mr. Frankel hung up on me.

Stank - Tell me you didn't lead with "Can I borrow five dollars?"

JS -

Stank -

JS - Be right back. *Justin leaves.*

Stank - ... ... Chad, Zane... ah screw it. Should be a good one.

Fade

[BookerShark]

Firewoman comes into the Darling Luxury Suites after her meeting with Stan, and flops down on the sofa, next to Alex. She flips on OOWF-TV.

FW: Which part of talking face to face does he not get?

AD: Who, dear?

FW: Fulton. Never mind...........I'm done being commissioner for the day.

AD: Allriiiiiiight....

FW: But....

AD: Dammit.

FW: He's right about one thing. Ecosystem. I need to just get over it.

AD: Fire, we've talked with Dr. Freedman about this, it isn't something you just wake up one day and get over.

FW: Sure I do. Who am I?

AD: Um....is this a trick question?

Alexis comes in.

LD: I'll tell you who she is...She is Lisa Fucking Darling, that's who.

FW: Damn straight.

AD: What are you two talking about?

LD: Hell if I know. But I recognize the tone. I'm glad to hear it's back.

FW: Thanks, Lex.

Fire thinks for a second, then gets up and goes to her room. She comes back out with her pretty, shiny birthday knife.

AD: Uh...where are you going with that?

FW: To see Ecosystem.

LD: Uh oh.

Alexander leaps to his feet.

AD: Fire...FIRE! That's just for show!

Fire looks at it, turning it back and forth to see all sides.

FW: I know. I'm going to go show it to him.

She heads for the door. Alex and Alexis look at each other and then run on either side of her, coming together again to block her way.

AD: Fire, Dr. Freedman is right, you are NOT ready for this.

LD: Why don't we sleep on it, and then see how you feel later?

FW: Very cute, guys. Move. Lisa Firewoman Darling does NOT run from anything, doesn't not cower in the ring. I meet everything head on, and don't look back. No excuses, no whining. Just like--

AD: Just like you went into the ring with Tytan?

He seems to be just a little angry. Fire gives him a look.

LD: Awk-ward.

FW: Look...I've been watching...I saw how...how hard it was for you, last year. And I'm sorry. So....so, sorry. But this is different.

AD: Lis, no it isn't. You've got a one track mind when it comes to this stuff that has nearly gotten you killed at least twice, including last year, and this time might just do it for real.

FW: We both know what should have happened last year. No use candy coating it. So if that's the outcome, it'd be just setting things right.

AD: Lis....don't....

FW: Whatever, Alex, look, this isn't like that anyway, okay? I promise. I just want to talk. I'm only taking the knife for protection okay?

AD: What is so fucking different this time?

LD: She won't be going alone.

Fire and Alex turn and look at Lexie.

LD: Last year, you shut us all out. No more. You wanna go confront Ecosystem finally, and exercise that demon? Good. You should. It's about time. But you are NOT going alone. We are going with you.

AD: We are?

LD: Well, I am. You can sit here, brother dear, and pontificate on how important family is, or you can get off your ass and prove it.

AD: ....

FW: Lexie, this isn't your battle.

LD: Fire...for as long as we've known each other, we've been family. From Philly, to Japan....and then finally reunited back here. And *she points to the rings that Alex and Fire wear around their necks* it IS fairly official, too. So...let's go, eh? All for one, one for all, and all that.

FW: Absolutely not.

AD: Fire....Lis....we're going. You don't know if Moose is there, or what else Eco would have up his sleeve.

FW: I can handle--

AD: No...if you persist, we'll have to handcuff you.

LD: And not in the fun way.

FW: ....

AD: ....

LD: ....

FW: Fine. You can come...AS BACK UP ONLY. Leave Ecosystem to me.

Firewoman flips her knife around and puts it in her leather jacket pocket. The three of them leave the room and head down the hall.

[BookerShark]

~~~ Chad and Zane are walking down The Hallway (tm) when the are accosted by a RNSFJ ~~~

RNSFJ: Texpress, you have had little to say about the New Guard and what happened to you. Any reason for that?

Zane: Unlike some of our fellow wrestlers, we aren't enamoured with the sound of our own voices.

Now, as for the New Guard calling us out... They're Idiots.

RNSFJ: Wow

Chad: Listen. We didn't hold anyone back. We made it abundantly clear that while we were champions, if you wanted a Championship opportunity, all you had to do was convince Selena. We never turned down a challenge.

Now, we didn't go hunting for opponents, but honestly, we had no need to. Our plate was already full. So If you want to complain about not getting your chances at us, you have one person to blame. The General Manager. And Honestly, Kai, Aina you can't complain about being held back.. HOW MANY TIMES have we faced off? How many chances did we give each other? You're argument has no basis.

Zane: And really You find success almost immediately after dumping Noelani. So now you let her come back and ride you coattails? Idiots.

RNSFJ: I've never known you to be name callers.

Zane: I said we were going to be calling a spade a spade when we saw it. So there you go.

RNSFJ: One more thing....

Zane: No, I said there you go. There (Points down the hallway) You (Points at her) GO!

~~~ She pouts her way down the hall. Chad turns to Zane ~~~

Chad: Harsh man. She didn't even ask us about the match this week.

Zane: I know we're facing the World's Greatest Tag Team in the History of Sliced Bread and Cake. They've won several matches here lately. Impressively, I might add. Stank's been tag team champion 8 times. Problem is, 6 of those runs lasted a month or less. None of them lasted two. Neither did Davin's Only One of ours was that short. And 3 of ours have longer than any of their runs. Do I even need to finish that sentence?

Chad: You should, we haven't hit the catchphrase in a while, and everyone else has been using it.

Zane: Did we copyright it?

Chad: No, you said that would be stupid.

Zane: And I was right. So when Davin & Stank want to whip it out and compare..

Chad: Zane?

Zane: ....Their Tag Team Resume's..... They wont Measure Up to The Texpress

Chad: Don't Believe Me? Cock-A-Doodle-Do!

Zane: What was that?

Chad: I dunno. Seemed like a good idea.

[BookerShark]

We cut to Matt Folz in the New Guard locker room, catching up on promos. Rewinding and watching LD Williams latest.

MF: I didn't know you ran a wrestling school, that's great. I've thought about doing the same thing after I retire. And for the record your promos are a hell of alot better than Moreland's, but that's beside the point.

The point is you're right. Your legacy is secure. You're a no doubt first ballot Hall Of Famer the very second you retire. As I've said before, you're probably the greatest technical wrestler in the history of this company. And you're right that I HAVE to win our match on Wednesday, not for the New Guard, but for myself.

Sure, I've cut some nice promos this past week. But if I don't back it up in the ring all those promos mean shit. I'll see you in the ring Wednesday, you want to win, I Have to win, we'll see what happens.

Fade