OOWF MidWeek Mayhem
Live! From Omsk, Russia
MARK VANDER vs. THE NERVE AGENTNerve Agent comes to the ring first and waits in the corner. Mark Vander is announced next and he makes his way to the ring with Alexander Bensouir slapping hands along the way. Vander is wearing a Smirnoff t-shirt, wonder if he is angling for the sponsorships that are left over after Run DLP gets finished? Vander steps between the ropes and Nerve immediately attacks him with clubbing shots to the back of the head. Nerve tries a whip but Vander reverses it and catches him with a boot to the face that sends him staggering to the ropes. Vander charges for a clothesline, but Nerve ducks and low bridges Vander to the floor. Nerve gets a running start and dives between the ropes nailing Vander and sending him crashing into the guard rail. Nerve rolls Vander back into the ring and lands a standing back flip and covers, but Vander powers out at one. Nerves pulls Vander to his feet and lands a couple of stiff kicks to the sides of his legs and ribs, then charges the ropes and springs off the bottom rope and tries a spinning kick, but Vander catches him and PLANTS him on the mat with a choke slam. Nerves rolls under the ropes to the floor trying to regroup, but Vander follows him to the outside and grabs him and military presses him above his head and throws him over the top rope into the ring. The Russian fans seem to be suitably impressed and start chanting STRONG LIKE BULL!! STRONG LIKE BULL! at Vander. Vander climbs into the ring and pulls Nerve to his feet and hauls him up in a vertical suplex, then shows off a little bit by holding him there with one arm before dropping him stomach first on the top rope, then bounding off the opposite ropes and nailing Nerve with a knee lift that sends him to the floor. Vander takes a second to soak up the cheers from the Russian crowd, which allows Nerve to get back into the ring. As Vander turns around Nerve catches him with an enzuguri that rocks the big man dropping him to one knee. Nerve bounds off the ropes and catches Vander with a clothesline to the side of the head, but he doesn’t go down, so Nerve charges again, but Vander catches him with a straight right cross to the jaw that drops Nerve to the mat. As Nerve struggles back to his feet Vander throws him over the top rope to the floor, but Nerves lands on his feet and quickly recovers. As Vander staggers around the ring trying to clear the cobwebs, Nerves hops back on the apron and waits for Vander to turn around. When he does, Nerve springs to the top rope and leaps trying for a clothesline, but Vander recovers and catches Nerve in mid air with a CLOTHESLINE FROM HELL!! Nerve does a complete 360 and lands face down on the mat. He could be dead. Not THE Dead, just dead. Vander rolls him over and covers, unnecessarily hooking the leg and gets the one, two, three.
WINNER in 4:52 – Mark Vander
THE HEELS vs. BLITZ & VOLTAGEThe Heels take their time coming to the ring stopping to taunt the Russian fans, probably not the smartest idea considering we are in the middle of nowhere and they probably wouldn’t find their bodies for years, if ever. Just sayin. Anyway Blitz and Voltage wait in the middle of the ring as the Heels finally work their way to the apron and step between the ropes. Johnny immediately grabs a mic and speaks:
What we would like to have right now is for all you vodka swilling hillbillies to rise and show some respect as my partner sings the Russian National AnthemAA doesn’t make it very far before the people threaten to riot. Evidently they didn’t appreciate him singing their National Anthem, whoda thought? Blitz and Voltage attack from behind and immediately become national heroes. Blitz catches Adrenaline with a drop kick that sends him over the top rope to the floor. Adrenaline struggles to his feet and staggers a little too close to the barricade and the fans pull him over the guard rail and into the crowd. Meanwhile inside the ring Voltage catches AA with a kick to the midsection and he and Blitz sends AA to the ropes and elevate him with a big back body drop. As AA gets to his feet a double drop kick sends him over the ropes to the floor as well. AA stomps around on the outside, then hears the scream of his partner. He reaches into the crowd and pulls Adrenaline to freedom, Johnny look like hell, his hair is messed up, his shirt is almost ripped off and he has scratches and cuts all over his body. He and AA turn and yell at the crowd, and while they have their backs turned Voltage and Blitz get a running start and try a plancha over the top rope but The Heels move out of the way. Blitz and Voltage land on their feet and looks at The Heels, The Heels charge and Blitz and Voltage side step and Johnny and AA crash into one another. Blitz and Voltage roll the Heels back into the ring as the fans cheer. AA looks like he will be the legal man in the ring and he is on his knees begging off as Volt comes after him. Johnny distracts the referee for a second which allows AA to his a low blow on Volt doubling him over in pain. AA gets to his feet and points to his head and taunts the crowd again, then pulls Volt to his feet and slams him in the middle of the ring and tags in Johnny. As AA stands there arguing with the referee, he keeps one foot across Volts throat choking him for several seconds before the referee finally notices and orders him out of the ring. Johnny pulls Volt to his feet and sends him to the ropes but lowers his head a moment too soon and Volt catches him with a kick to the jaw that stands Johnny up. Volt lunges and tags Blitz in, Blitz charges in but immediately gets taken to the mat with a drop toe hold, Johnny gets to his feet and hits the ropes and drops a knee right to the back of Blitz’s head. Johnny pulls Blitz to his feet and sends him to the ropes and drops him with a clothesline, then pulls him up and hits a hangman’s neck breaker. Johnny makes a lazy cover, but Blitz is out at two. Adrenaline gets to his feet and charges over and catches Voltage with a forearm to the face that sends him off the apron, then turns back to Blitz as he is getting to his feet and kicks him low and hits the ADRENALINE RUSH!!!! Blitz is dead. Adrenaline pulls him off the mat and tags in AA, and they kill him a little more with a SPIKE PILEDRIVER!! Johnny runs across the ring as Voltage gets back on the apron and knocks him to the floor again as AA puts on a completely unnecessary IRON CLAW and gets the one, two, three.
WINNERS in 5:03 – The Heels
F. FONZWORTH MACCAPPINGTON III vs. ECOSYSTEMEcosystem comes to the ring first and waits patiently in the ring, sitting on top of the turnbuckle. Vivialdi fires up and F. Fonzworth MacCappington makes his way to the ring escorted by Lance. He pauses occasionally to sneer at the fans and recoil in terror when they try to reach out and touch him. They finally make it to the ring and Lance holds the ropes open for MacCappington to enter the ring. MacCappington looks down his nose at Ecosystem across the ring, then tell Lance to get him a mic. Lance scurries out of the ring and comes back and tries to hand MacCappington the mic, he gives him an incredulous look and Lance immediately stiffens up and holds the mic for MacCappington to speak:
Ecosystem. I find it odd that we stand across the ring from one another. You know, when I formed LOADED, I looked for the best talent in the OOWF and you caught my eye. Now, at that time you were in a dead end team with that wastrel Voltage, throwing people through windows and essentially not being taken seriously. I gave you the chance to join the most elite group in wrestling history. And once you did, it was simply a matter of time until you became a champion, the first time in your OOWF history that you had ever held a title. Then, we get a chance to make our mark in wrestling history, LOADED joins forces with Bennett’s Army to take GM the Rick down, it was to be the crowning moment of my career, of OUR careers. But then a funny thing happened. A few days after we sided with Bennett, I find out that you not only defected from me, the man who provided you with all you could ever want, but you became co-GM of the OOWF in Rick’s absence! So, Judas, what do you have to say for yourself?
<Lance walks across the ring and hands the mic to Ecosystem who jumps off the top rope sending Lance scurrying back behind MacCappington>
Eco: You know Fonz, you are right. You gave me a shot, and for that I am thankful. But let me give you a little lesson here. You see, back when the OOWF first started, I was given the position of GM. I was young and foolish, and soon the pressure got to me, and I admit it, I cracked. I walked away from the OOWF with no warning. I realize now what kind of a precarious position I put them in, but the OOWF forged on and became what it is today. Years later I decided that I wanted to come back. I admit I was a little skeptical at first, but they like you say, a funny thing happened, I was welcomed back with open arms. Yeah, we sided with Bennett, or should I say, YOU sided us with Bennett, I never had a say in the matter. Well, when Stank, Davin and Erlana offered me my old position back, there was really only one thing I could say.
<Eco tosses the mic back toward MacCappington, Lance immediately picks it up and holds it for MacCappington, this time he takes the mic and after some deep thought, he speaks>
FFM: You know, Eco, you have some good points there. Perhaps I was a little quick to judge when I….With that MacCappington lunges forward and hammers Eco between the eyes with the mic. Eco goes down in a heap and FFM mounts him and hammers him with shots to the face. FFM pulls Eco to his feet and sends him to the ropes and catches him with a black hole slam! Eco bounces off the mat and rolls under the ropes to the floor. The camera catches Eco pulling himself off the floor and we see that he has been busted open. Eco works to get himself back on the apron and FFM grabs him and runs him down the apron, face first into the steel ring post sending him back to the floor. Eco struggles to get to his feet and staggers around the ring. From the inside FFM grabs him by the head and tries to pull him into the ring, but Eco grabs him by the head and snaps him throat first down on the top rope sending MacCappington snapping back into the ring. Eco climbs back into the ring and waits for MacCappington to get to his feet, then peppers him with a couple shots to the jaw that rocks the big man. Eco hits the ropes for the finishing shot, but FFM gets a boot up that catches him right in the jaw. MacCappington hauls him into a back breaker, then falls to his knees snapping Eco’s spine across his shoulders. FFM covers, but Eco kicks out after two. MacCappington gets to his feet and motions for Eco to get to his feet, each time he gets to one knee, MacCappington kicks him in the head sending him sprawling to the mat. Finally MacCappington tries it one time too many and Eco catches his foot and sweeps his other leg from underneath him, sending FFM crashing to the mat. Eco keeps hold of FFM’s leg as he gets to his feet and drops several knees down on the inside of FFM’s knee then locks him in a figure four. FFM howls in pain but won’t give up. He reaches for the ropes but can’t reach them, so while the referee is distracted Lance reaches in and pulls the big man toward the ropes until he can finally grab them and force the break. Eco lets FFM get to his feet, but lands some stiff kicks to the back of his leg. As FFM stands up using the ropes, Eco grabs the back of his head and hits a lung blower, only its not knees to the back, its knees to the back of the head! FFM is OUT! Eco covers, but Lance reaches in and puts FFM’s foot on the bottom rope. Eco gets to his feet and yells at the referee and takes a kick at Lance that sends him running. Eco pulls a groggy FFM to the center of the ring and climbs the ropes and hits the SOY BOMB!!!! MacCappington is in trouble! Eco locks him in the Dragon sleeper and FFM struggles and starts to fade. Before the referee can ring the bell, The Dead runs down to the ring and hops on the apron. The referee yells for him to leave at once but he refuses. Finally Eco breaks the hold and gets to his feet and lands a drop kick to Dead that sends him off the apron. Meanwhile Lance slides FFM’s cane into the ring, FFM grabs it, and when Eco turns around, FFM BLASTS him right in the throat with it! Eco falls to his knees and FFM gets rid of the evidence FFM pulls him up and hits the Greetings From Pacific Heights, covers, and gets the one, two, three!
WINNER in 11:51 – F. Fonzworth MacCappington
FIREWOMAN vs. BEAST vs. THE DEADWe’re about to get started in this match between Onslaught Title contenders featuring the three people who had a title chance last week, but lost out when Bunny was knocked out on top of a prone Beast to get the three count. Coming down first is the man who hit Bunny knocking him into the pinning position. Here comes The Dead to “Doomsday Clock” by the Smashing Pumpkins. He steps out from the back and as soon as he does the boos start and they only get louder when current Bennett’s Army manager Moosehead Jack comes out behind him. The Dead makes his way down to the ring talking with Moose as they both step foot in the ring and await the other competitors in this match. And coming up next is the anger-management needing DEA member Firewoman. The Cult’s “Firewoman” starts to play and out comes Firewoman and she’s not alone as The DEA manager Alexis Darling is behind her and…who is that…it can’t be…YES…MONGOOSE McQUEEN is in the building and he’s escorting Firewoman down to ringside. Alexis is walking a step behind looking over some paperwork and seemingly getting very annoyed. The camera zooms in on the papers Alexis is looking at and all we see are a bunch of numbers and diagrams and flow charts. Alexis has enough and crumbles up the paper and tosses it and winds up hitting Mongoose in the back of the head. Firewoman turns to see what is happening and Alexis just shrugs her shoulders. Firewoman and Mongoose step into the ring as the music ends and slowly getting into the ring behind them is Alexis who is looking anywhere but across the ring at Moose. Meanwhile The Dead is trying to talk to Firewoman even though she is pointedly ignoring him and stretching on the ropes while McQueen gives her some last second words of encouragement. All of this in-ring drama continues when Iron Maiden’s “Number of the Beast” kicks in and we all await the appearance of Beast. No one knows from where or how he’ll get to the ring so everyone is looking around the arena. Alexis gets out of the ring and opens her briefcase AND BEAST POPS OUT!!!!!. Alexis jumps back, while Beast slides into the ring and goes right after The Dead. Everyone clears out of the ring except our three combatants and we’re underway as the ref calls for the bell.
Beast and TD start slugging it out while Firewoman looks on and tries to find an opening and she finds one after TD whips Beast into the ropes and this allows FW to hit a beautiful dropkick from the side completely unseen by Beast. The Dead nods in approval and goes to give Fire a hand up when she slaps it away and starts throwing knife-hand chops on Dead. The crowd is WHOOing loudly as Fire is ferocious in her attack on TD as he gets pushed back into the corner. She continues to hit him with chops when all of a sudden she’s thrown down to the mat by a recovered Beast. Beast starts laying into TD with a few back elbows before he’s tossed to the side by a recovered Fire. But instead of continuing the attack on TD she jumps down and tries to get a quick Fujiwara arm bar but Beast rolls out of it and grabs the rope. The Dead has finally recovered in the corner and just as Firewoman stands up she is met by a boot to the midsection. Followed up by a quick snap suplex. TD rolls it over and goes for a second but is stopped when he’s met by a clothesline from Beast. Beast has had enough of this for now and picks Dead up his trunks and lifts him over his head before tossing him to the outside. Moose heads on over to help his comrade up. But let’s not worry about that right now as Firewoman is getting to her feet and meets Beast in the center of the ring. The two start trading huge clubbing forearms before the power of Beast takes its toll on Fire and he whips her into the ropes, drops down and FW jumps over him. Off the other side and Beast goes for a leap frog but Fire sees it and stops short just as Beast leaps. Once he lands, standing hurricanrana. Goes for the pin, but only gets TWO.
Fire stays on the attack and starts using her speed and quickness to continue holding the advantage over Beast. Meanwhile Dead stays on the outside and recovers from the early portions of this match. Mongoose is yelling from the outside trying to get Dead to get back in the ring, but that stops with one glare from Moose. Back in the ring, Fire finally makes a mistake and goes for a suplex on Beast but he’s too big for her to get up in the air and he clubs her down with some big, powerful blows to the back. But before he can take a big advantage on Fire, Dead is back in and goes for the single leg on Beast, but he laughs that off and gives TD some massive forearms of his own. While Firewoman recovers in a neutral corner, Beast whips TD into an opposite corner and after sharing a quick look with Fire, Beast charges TD and levels him with a clothesline which knocks Dead down to his ass and Fire quickly follows in and nails TD with an Ole Kick. This is not what we expected to see tonight as Beast and Fire seem to be working together better than Dead and Fire. But the working together does not last long as Beast and Fire share another look and go back to beating the hell out of each other. Moose is again whispering in Dead’s ear trying to get him to stop playing games. In the center of the ring though, this time Beast has the advantage on Fire as his power is just too much for her. He is absolutely lighting Fire up with alternating rights and lefts and Fire is reeling. Beast must think Fire’s close to the end as he whips her into the corner and gets in position opposite her. He waits for her to stagger out of the corner…he has her perfectly set up for the GORE…GORE…GORE…Fire has no clue what’s in store for her. Mongoose and Alexis are trying to get her attention, but she’s in a daze…she takes a step out of the corner and Beast charges…
WHAM….
CLOSING THE CASKET…
Where the fuck did The Dead come from? This match is over…Dead makes the cover on Beast…1…2…and no, Fire pulls him off to break up the count. Dead gets up and gets right in Fire’s face…the two are jawing back and forth before Dead says something which shuts Fire up. She nods at him and they reach down together to pick up Beast. It looks like the mutual respect team of The Dead and Firewoman is back to cooperating. The two actually do work really well together as the exceptional speed of Firewoman is a nice balance to the smoothness of Dead’s move set. Dead uses his strength to lead right into Fire’s moves of speed and agility. They even go so far as to hit the old-school PowerPlex on Beast…but there is something quite glaring here as neither is even attempting to cover. Alexis jumps up on the apron to try and find out why Fire isn’t making the cover and Firewoman is trying to ignore her but she can’t do that as Moose makes his way around the outside. Firewoman notices this and jumps through the ropes and gets in Moose’s way. Moose points behind Fire right at Alexis and she backs off slowly as Fire looks like she wants to hit Moose. But she knows he’s untouchable right now so she motions him to get away from that side of the ring. He gives her a condescending nod as he points back in the ring where Dead and Beast are going blow for blow. FW waits until MHJ walks away before getting back into the ring and going right back after Beast. FW and TD then continue to beat Beast down even as he tries to fight back and there are even a few moments where Dead turns his back on Fire and you can sense her wanting to attack, but she doesn’t. Beast goes to fight back again, but it’s cut down rather quickly by a chop block from FW. As Beast is prone on his stomach, The Dead wraps up his legs and gets him in position for the Dead Stomp.
Fire has had enough of this though and pushes Dead off Beast. They seem to be arguing about who came up with and who can do a better curb stomp. They are shoving each other back and forth before FW fires off a stiff forearm to the side of Dead’s head. Dead takes it and fires off one of his own at Fire’s skull. Back and forth, forearm after forearm, off the ropes and more blows…it looks like this partnership is ending in front of our eyes. As the two continue to trade shots with each other, Beast is recovering and starting to stand up, but he quickly goes back down as Fire and Dead turn their attention to him and hit a beautiful Rock ‘n’ Roll Express-esque double dropkick. Both look like they want to make the cover but instead go back to firing blows to each other’s head. Meanwhile Beast quickly recovers from the dropkick and before the other two can notice he charges both and hits them with a double clothesline. He has so much power behind his left arm though that FW goes clean flying out of the ring. Alexis and Mongoose are quickly over to try and help her recover. Inside the ring Beast has seemingly had enough of the back and forth and is a “beast” possessed as he lights up TD with knife hands and open palm slaps to Dead’s chest. The welts are really beginning to show and Dead is in serious trouble. Fire’s still dazed on the outside and Moose is having no luck getting Dead back on track here. Firewoman is getting back on the apron but she’s quickly knocked off by an Irish-whipped Dead and TD is completely annihilated by a POUNCE from Beast. He goes for the cover…
1…
2…
And the ref notices The Dead’s leg barely grazing the bottom rope as Moose looks on nonchalantly. He shrugs as the ref asks him if he had anything to do with it. Beast glares down at Moose as Mongoose and Alexis help Firewoman onto the apron behind Beast. Beast motions for the CLUBBING FOREARM OF DEATH but as he turns around to go back after Dead he’s met by a beautiful somersault plancha from Fire. She seems to have recovered nice as she kips up to her feet and takes Beast down with a Ricky Steamboat like arm drag…and another…and a third. Beast is prone in the center of the ring…Fire rushes off the ropes and jumps off the second. FIRESAULT. Mongoose is going bonkers on the outside pounding on the apron as Fire makes the cover…1…2…nooooooo. Beast barely rolls a shoulder off the canvas. But Firewoman is in control and she has so much adrenaline flowing that she gets Beast up and plants him with an awesome looking Michinoku Driver. Beast is set up near the ropes and Firewoman is going for the finish…she points to the ropes and then to her allies at ringside…
BEST…
FIRESAULT…
EVER…
She nails it. FW rolls over to make the cover and as she gets on her knees she is absolutely killed by a punt from The Dead out of nowhere. Firewoman is completely out of it and rolls to the outside. The Dead laughs and rolls Beast over onto his stomach and makes sure he’s facing the side of DEA on the outside. He gets Beast into position and nails his new Dead Stomp. He rolls Beast back over…the ref gets down and starts the count.
1…
2…
and 3.
This match is over as The Dead steals a win from right under Firewoman’s nose. He gets off Beast and heads to the outside to join Moosehead Jack. The two clasp hands and Moose congratulates The Dead on a job well done as Mongoose, Firewoman, and Alexis all glare up the aisle. Meanwhile Beast is trying to get back to his feet as a ring attendant hands him a bottle of water. He opens it and LUCKY POPS OUT.
Beast smiles before grabbing Lucky and hightailing it out of the ring and through the crowd before Firewoman realizes her valet has been kidnapped again. But back to the match…
WINNER in 25:17: The Dead!
DONOVAN VIPER vs. FIRECHILDDonovan Viper, accompanied by Moosehead Jack, comes to the ring first. They discuss strategy briefly and Viper warms up as Firechild makes his entrance. He acknowledges the crowd, but is focused on his opponent. FC gets into the ring, Moose exits, and referee Junior Hale calls for the bell. They lock up and Viper buries a knee in FC stomach. FC doubles over and Viper drives his elbow into the back of his head. FC goes down and Viper tries to lock on the Anaconda Vice, but FC twists away. Both men roll to their feet, and FC catches Viper with a punch to the midsection, and follows up with a DDT. He covers, but Viper kicks out at two-Faced pulls Viper to his feet and pushes him into the corner. He blisters Viper with a series of chops and goes for an Irish whip, but Viper reverses, following FC in with a brutal clothesline. FC stumbles out of the corner and Viper pitches him over the top rope to the floor. While Viper and Junior discuss the morality of those tactics, Moosehead Jack gets some kicks in at FC. Viper cuts the conversation off as Jack stuffs FC back into the ring. Viper pulls FC up and drags him to the corner, slamming his head into the turnbuckle and spinning him around. Viper goes for a Death Elbow, but FC ducks and Viper hits the corner. FC turns around with a spinning kick to the face, backs up a couple of steps and runs up the turnbuckles, driving a knee into Viper’s head. Viper stumbles out of the corner and FC comes off the ropes with a bulldog. FC covers and hooks the leg, but there’s no ref to count because Junior is busy arguing with Jack, who’s jumped onto the apron. FC gets up and joins in, allowing Viper to roll to the outside and grab his chain. Moose sees Viper get back in the ring and fakes dropping off the apron, causing FC to turn around. Junior starts to turn as well, but Moose keeps his attention while Viper hits a chain-assisted Death Elbow. FC falls like he’s been shot, and Viper ditches the chain. Moose drops off the apron and Junior turns around in time to see Viper hit a leg drop and cover for the three.
WINNER, in 9:46, Donovan Viper.
After the match Firechild struggles to his feet and as he stands WHAM! He gets PASTED with a chair across the face! Firechild falls to the mat, twitching in pain. The camera pans around and we see an expressionless F. Fonzworth MacCappington III standing there. He calls for Viper’s chain and Donovan tosses it to him. FFM wraps it around his fist and hammers away at Firechild’s face until he is an unrecognizable mess. FFM and Viper pull him to his feet and Viper climbs to the top rope and FFM lifts him for a pile driver and Viper leaps off the ropes turning it into a spike pile driver. Firechild’s neck twists awkwardly and he lies very still on the mat. FFM and Viper reach down and wipe the blood off his face and writes in Fires blood on his chest “BA” on his chest, presumably standing for Bennett’s Army. They stand over him and look at the blood on their hands. Just then Rick’s men storm the ring, Moose yells to FFM and Viper and they slip out of the ring before anyone can get their hands on them. Medics come to the ring and check on Fire, he is placed in a neck brace and carried from the ring and rushed to the nearest hospital in Omsk.
ERIC O’MAC vs. CONCRETE TG"With Jupiter In Mind" fills the arena and the crowd goes nuts. Concrete steps out from the back and calls outs the crowd. They respond wildly. Concrete TG flexes as the pyro explodes behind him. He walks to the ring with a look of purpose on his face as the fans reach across the barrier to high-five him. Crete steps into the ring and awaits his opponent.
MOVE BITCH, GET OUT THE WAY! Eric O'Mac hits the ramp to a showering of boos. He soaks them up as he stares at Concrete. He makes his way down the ramp and points to the only anti-Crete sign in the building (is it a plant?). "Crete sold out!" it says, and Eric laughs. Eric steps into the ring and the referee looks like he's ready to signal for the bell. Before he can, however, Eric O'Mac asks the referee to pat down Crete for illegal objects. This causes the crowd to boo even harder as Crete looks slightly irate. Eric laughs once more as the referee goes through the pat down. Satisfied that there are no weapons, the referee calls for the bell.
The two lock up to start things off. Eric O'Mac pushes Crete into the corner and the referee calls for the break. Eric backs off for a split second and the knees Crete right in the gut. Eric peppers in a few right hands that stagger Crete for a moment. Eric goes for one punch too many, however, and Crete blocks it and responds with a right hand of his own. Crete grabs Eric and switches positions, putting Eric in the corner. Crete steps up to the second rope and begins throwing more punches as the crowd counts along. ONE, TWO, THREE, FOUR, FIVE, SIX, SEVEN, EIGHT, NINE, TE...Eric shoves Crete off the second rope and kicks him in the stomach. Crete staggers backwards and Eric charges and connects with a swinging neckbreaker. Eric points at the crowd and yells in their general direction. This draws the ire of the crowd, much to the delight of Eric O'Mac. Eric goes back to Crete, but the momentary delay has allowed Crete to get back to his feet. Crete whips Eric into the ropes and hip tosses him on the bounce back. Eric pops right back to his feet just in time to eat a vicious clothesline. Eric is noticeably slower getting to his feet this time, but manages to duck just in time to avoid another clothesline. Eric grabs Crete from behind and delivers a wicked belly-to-back suplex. Both men try to catch their breath as they slowly make their way to their feet. They begin trading punches in the middle of the ring, hoping to gain an advantage. Eric thinks he sees an opening and tries to take down Crete, but Crete sidesteps and shoves Eric into the corner. Crete charges in after him, but Eric gets an elbow up that connects solidly with Crete's jaw. Crete stumbles backwards and Eric hits a running forearm that sends Crete to the mat. Cover. One...Two...Crete kicks out. Eric bounces off the ropes and drops a knee into the head of Crete and goes for another cover. One...Two...Crete kicks out again. Eric picks up Crete and whips him, but Crete reverses it and sends Eric bouncing off the ropes. Crete lifts Eric high in the air with a big back body drop. Eric hits the mat hard and grabs at his lower back. Eric tries to get back to his feet but Crete kicks him square in the ass. Heroes' Taunt! Eric looks livid as he gets to his feet and charges at Crete. Crete moves out of the way and Eric goes diving to the outside, hitting the floor hard. As Eric struggles to get to his feet Crete climbs to the top rope. Eric finally gets into an upright position but he seems to be on rubber legs. Crete launches himself off the top. He's going for a huge crossbody! Eric sees it just in time and delivers a desperation dropkick that catches Crete in the head and chest. Holy shit! Both men are now down on the outside as the crowd chants "That was awesome!". Eric manages to get to his feet first and staggers over to Concrete. He picks Crete up by the head and slams his face into the steel steps. Eric pulls Crete's head back and slams it again. He goes for a third attempt, but Crete reverses it and sends Eric's face into the unforgiving steel. Blood is trickling down from both combatant's faces as the referee pleads with them to get back into the ring. Crete dutifully slides back in and waits for Eric. Eric gets back to his feet and climbs up onto the apron. Crete meets him there and the two again trade punches. Eric grabs Crete's head and drops off the apron, dropping Crete's neck into the top rope. Crete staggers backwards and tries to catch his breath as Eric quickly slides into the ring. Eric runs past Crete and bounces off the ropes. He hits Crete with a bulldog and then immediately locks in a triangle choke. Crete looks like he's in a bad way as he struggles to get to the ropes. Eric tightens the hold and tries to get Crete to either tap out or pass out. Crete musters up all the strength he can manage and makes it to the ropes, forcing Eric to break the hold. Crete pulls himself up with the aid of the ropes and sees Eric charging at him. Crete drops Eric with a drop toe hold and Eric falls throat first into the second rope. Crete sees the position Eric's in and motions to the crowd. The crowd cheers wildly as they know what is coming. Crete bounces off the far rope and....C-T-G! Crete goes for the pin. One...Two...Eric kicks out! Both men seem to be gasping for air as they get on their feet. Crete throws a right hand, but Eric ducks and hits a T-Bone suplex out of nowhere! Crete is grabbing onto the back of his head/neck as Eric climbs to the top rope. He flies through the air. It's the Mac Attack! Crete rolls out of the way just in time and Eric crashes and burns. Crete picks up Eric, kicks him in the stomach, and plants him with a DDT. Cover. One...Two...Eric kicks out! Neither man can seem to put this one away. Crete picks up Eric, but Eric buys himself a moment by thumbing Crete in the eye. Eric grabs Crete and it looks like he's going for the Rock Bottom! Crete buries a knee in Eric's midsection, grabs him, and sets him up for Final Justice! Eric slips out and sunset flips Crete over into a pin. One...Two...Crete reverses it and rolls up Eric. One...Two...Three right as Eric O'Mac kicks out!
WINNER in 14:17 - Concrete TG
Eric is incensed as Concrete is declared the winner. Eric argues with the referee that he CLEARLY kicked out before the three count, but the referee is hearing none of it. The referee raises Concrete's hand and Crete enjoys the cheers until Eric attacks him from behind. The crowd begins to boo as Eric puts the boots to Crete. Soon, Chris Cole, LD Williams, F. Fonzworth MacCappington, The Dead, Donovan Viper, Johnny Adrenaline, Attitude Adjuster, SYB and Skurge make their way down the ramp and join in the beat down. Eric goes to the outside and grabs a chair. He tosses it to The Dead, who tosses it back to Eric. Eric throws it at Crete, who instinctively catches it. Bad idea. Van Deadinator! In a moment of solidarity, Eric and Dead high-five as the rest of Bennett's Army beats down Crete. Viper hits a chain-assisted Death Elbow. MacCappington picks up Crete and looks like he's about to drop him on his head when Davin Moreland comes running out from the back with a chair in hand. Not just any chair, mind you, but a flaming chair. That's right, the chair is on fire! Bennett's Army clears the ring as Davin swings wildly at them. The crowd cheers for Moreland and he extends a hand out to Crete. Crete can barely move, but he reaches for Davin's hand. Out of nowhere, Chris Cole jumps back into the ring and drops Davin with the Headliner! The rest of Bennett's Army slides back into the ring and continues the beat down on both Davin and Crete. Eventually, Bennett's Army decides to head backstage, leaving Davin Moreland and Concrete TG in a heap in the ring.
CHRIS COLE vs. DAVIN MORELAND – Best of Seven Series: Match 1This match will be the first of a best-of-seven series. The winner will become the #1 Contender for the OOWF World Championship. The Russian crowd is on their feet and hyped for this one. They unleash a vicious soundwave of boos as “Master of Puppets” comes over the PA system. “The Main Event” Chris Cole is in full-on heel mode as he slowly makes his way down the ramp as is his custom. He’s doing “psyche” handslaps with the crowd and talking a ton of trash before he finally gets into the ring with mutually-agreed-upon Davis Hightower, who will be the referee for the entire series. The house lights quickly go out and huge white pyro goes off. The crowd rises as one as “Pull Me Under” comes over the PA. Davin Moreland is greeted by a huge ovation as he slaps hands with the crowd on the way down the ramp. He does his famous double jump from the floor to inside the ring, and IMMEDIATELY the words start flying back and forth. Hightower hasn’t even had a chance to breathe as the two are nose-to-nose, screaming at one another. Finally, Davin says something like “5 straight times”, and gets LEVELED with a big right hand. Hightower calls for the bell and WE’RE UNDERWAY!
Cole looks to press his advantage with some stomps, and a quick legdrop to the back of the head. He takes a quick look at Moreland, splayed out on his stomach, and Cole runs the ropes to deliver a big elbow to the back of the head. Cole moves to Davin’s legs and locks on his ELEVATED TEXAS CLOVERLEAF! Cole is looking to end this one early. Davin hasn’t even started yet and he is in TROUBLE! 15 seconds, 20 seconds go by as Davin is screaming in pain. Will he actually tap out? 30 seconds, and Davin is able to get some traction and move toward the ropes. After about 45 seconds after being in the hold, Davin manages to get to the ropes for the break. Cole keeps the hold on for the full 5-count before letting go. Davin tries to pull himself up by the ropes, but Cole charges from across the ring and dumps Moreland to the outside with a Wicked Clothesline. Cole is focused and is wasting no time; he hops to the outside. He picks up a still-recovering Moreland and hits a wicked GUTWRENCH SUPLEX on the floor. Cole isn’t nearly done, and goes to clear off the announce table, making sure to take the monitors out carefully. Davin is stirring, so Cole pulls him to his feet, and hits a BIG SPINEBUSTER ON THE STEEL STEPS! Ow. Cole goes back to his housecleaning until he’s satisfied, and the announcers have run for cover. He pulls Moreland up and pushes him onto the table. Cole signals to the crowd for the Headliner! He climbs on top of the table, gets Davin into position, and hits a HEADLINER RIGHT THROUGH THE AMERICAN ANNOUNCE TABLE! Hightower is outside now, screaming for Cole, woozy from the execution of the move, back to the ring. Once Cole is able, he complies, as Hightower makes sure Moreland is alive. Moreland is bloody, but breathing. He makes a gesture that implies Davin is “ok”, so Hightower gets into the ring, and starts a count, while Cole celebrates in the ring.
Hightower is at 6 before Moreland even moves. He seems to shake out the cobwebs a bit as Hightower reaches 7. Cole is facing the opposite direction, showing the crowd what number the count is on with his hands, as they sing along. Davin is to his knees, and manages to flop near the ring at 8. At 9, Davin somehow grabs the bottom rope, and with sheer arm strength pulls himself up, and is able to bundle into the ring just as Hightower is about to hit 10. Cole is jumping around like he won and goes up on the turnbuckle to celebrate. After a few seconds, Davin is able to get to his feet, and Cole looks confused as the crowd reacts. He turns around and his eyes bug out of his head when he sees the bloody Moreland standing in front of him. Davin yells a loud expletive at this point which I can’t repeat, but let’s just say he mentioned something about Cole having relations with his Mom. Cole is still stunned that Moreland is standing, never mind that he’s charging at him. Cole snaps back to reality just in time to hit a drop-toe-hold on Davin, who faceplants into the turnbuckle. Cole goes to work on the semi-hung-up Moreland, with stomps to the small of the back, and picking up the feet of Moreland, and ramming his knees into the mat. He wraps his hands around Moreland’s waist, and powers him up for a HUGE RELEASE GERMAN SUPLEX! He moves quickly over to Davin, and locks on an INDIAN DEATH LOCK! Davin is in HUGE trouble and he starts screaming again. Cole seems intent on making Davin tap here. 30 seconds, 45 seconds, a full minute goes by before Davin can get to the ropes again, and again Cole uses the full 5-count before breaking the hold, and is strongly admonished by Hightower. Cole and Hightower have some back-and-forth conversation, and no one but the crowd notices the bloody, and now noticeably limping, Davin Moreland pull himself to his feet.
From behind, Moreland charges and DRILLS Cole in the back of the head with a Running Clothesline. Cole doesn’t go down, but he is ASSAULTED with WICKED CHOPS all the way back into the turnbuckle. Moreland drills Cole with a Standing Dropkick which wobbles Cole. Davin gets up and WHIPS Cole to the other turnbuckle, but it’s REVERSED and Moreland hits the turnbuckle. Cole charges and is greeted with a BIG BOOT to the grill. Davin hops the turnbuckle and nails Cole with a BIG CROSS-BODY into a pin. Cover: 1, 2, no. Cole kicked out pretty easily. Davin wastes no time and runs the ropes, hitting a STANDING SHOOTING STAR PRESS! He hooks the leg: 1, 2, NO. Davin back to the ropes, and hits a SPRINGBOARD MOONSAULT! Cover: 1, 2, NO! Davin back to the ropes and looks for a CORKSCREW 360 PRESS, and EATS KNEES! Cole and Davin are both down, but Davin is back up first and running the ropes. Cole manages to get back to his feet, and hits a HUGE BACK BODY DROP OVER THE ROPE TO THE FLOOR! Cole tries to shake it out a bit before getting to the outside, and looks for a BIG LEG DROP TO THE FLOOR…NOBODY HOME! Davin is to his feet and DRILLS Cole with two STIFF KICKS to the back of the head. He bundles the near-lifeless Cole back into the ring before following with a SLINGSHOT 360 ON COLE! Cover: 1, 2, NO! Davin slaps the mat and looks at the prone Cole who has rolled to his stomach. Davin locks on an ANKLE LOCK! Cole tries to roll out of it to no avail. Davin GRAPEVINES THE LEG! Cole has his hand up…He might tap! After a full minute plus, Cole manages to get to the ropes, and Davin used the full 5-count before breaking the hold, to the surprise of Hightower.
Cole pulls himself up by the ropes, and Davin saunters over looking for some offense. Cole drills him with shots to the gut, doubling the big man over. Cole runs the ropes looking for a Scissors Kick, but NOBODY’S HOME! Before Cole can regain his legs underneath him, Davin DRILLS him with a REALLY GOOD DIAMOND CUTTER! He eschews the cover and looks like he’s trying to make a decision. He apparently makes the decision and locks on a SHARPSHOOTER IN THE CENTER OF THE RING! He’s tweaking the ankle he worked on earlier! Cole is in HUGE TROUBLE and has NOWHERE TO GO! 75 seconds or so go by, before Davin starts SCREAMING for Cole to tap (I think he called him a name that sounds like “Witch” in this sequence)! Finally, Cole can take no more, and after putting in a yeoman’s effort to avoid it…COLE TAPS!
WINNER in 22:16 by SUBMISSION…DAVIN MORELAND! Davin Moreland leads the best-of-seven 1-0.
Davin taunts Cole for a second, bending down and screaming “THAT’S 6!” Unfortunately, he’s so involved he doesn’t see AA, JA, Eric, The Dead, Viper, LD Williams, Skurge and SYB fly down to the ring, with Moose following behind and directing traffic from the floor. Davin manages to floor the Heels, IHOP and Dead before Viper, Eric and LD can get to him, but the numbers are too much, and Davin succumbs to them. Someone tosses a chair inside, and the recovered Cole delivers wicked chair shot after wicked chair shot to the near-dead Davin. Moose produces what looks like an oversized bumper sticker and gives it to Eric, who sticks it on Davin’s back. The group gets a few more stomps in before leaving and congratulating each other. The camera focuses in on the lifeless Moreland, and we see what the sticker says:
“Team Bennett”
THE MIDNIGHT SONS vs. BADThe B.A.D. make their way to the ring first, taking swigs from a vodka bottle along the way (we’re in Russia after all.) The Midnight Sons head to ringside, and they look like all business. As DH and Spin enter the ring, Seamus and Damon attack. DH is tossed to the arena floor and Spin takes a vicious shot from the vodka bottle from Damon. Hansen is bleeding profusely, and the bell hasn’t even rang. The four men exchanges blows and we have ourselves a slobberknocker already! Eventually, the referee manages to regain control of the melee, and we get DH and Damon to start. At the bell, the two charge each other and the brawl resumes. Damon gets the upper hand and whips DH into the BAD corner. Seamus holds DH down and Damon charges in with a shoulderblock, doubling Magnusson over. Wrath scoop slams DH, and hits a big leg drop for 2. Damon drags DH back to the corner and tags in McNasty. Seamus comes in with lefts and rights. Magnusson eats a backdrop, then a pile driver for another 2 count. Damon props his boot on the turnbuckle, and McNasty drags DH over, ready to smash hits head into the boot. Magnusson blocks it, and throws Seamus into Damon. Wrath falls to the arena floor, and DH makes it over to tag in Spin. Hansen is in and on fire. Seamus eats a vicious clothesline, gets power slammed into the turnbuckles, and tied in the tree of woe. Spin backs up momentarily, and then proceeds to kick and stomp Seamus in the gut over and over and over. DH cuts off the referee as Damon runs over and gets head butted repeatedly by Hansen, who is bleeding again after delivering the head butts. The referee finally makes it over and frees McNasty, who collapses in a heap. Spin throws Seamus into the ropes and hits a big belly to belly suplex. Hansen follows up with a fall away slam and covers for 2. DH gets tagged in and the Sons hit a Demolition Decapitation (or whatever Demolitions finisher was called.) Seamus is out, DH covers and gets a 1 count before Damon runs in to break up the pin attempt. Spin runs in and we have another brawl breaking loose! Wrath catches Spin from behind with a shot to the head and Hansen tumbles through the ropes. Seamus follows him out, courtesy of Magnusson. DH and Wrath battle, while the referee tries to separate the two men. Seamus climbs back in the ring at his corner, and Wrath ducks out of the ring to get the tag. Damon re-enters the ring, and Magnusson greets him with a clothesline. Wrath side-steps a spear and begins pounding on DH’s back. Damon bounces off the ropes and delivers a thunderous big boot that levels Magnusson. Damon bounces off the opposite rope, and is hit from behind by Spin from the apron. Wrath turns to face Hansen and eats a head butt right between the eyes. Wrath staggers backwards into DH, who hooks him in a Russian Leg sweep, then floats over and locks in Dream street! Spin runs in to cut off Seamus, who he downs with a drop toe hold and traps in the Whiskey Tango Foxtrot! Both McNasty and Wrath struggle to free themselves from the dual submissions. Wrath stretches his arm out and gets within inches of the bottom rope, but goes no further. Moments later, Damon and Seamus tap simultaneously and this one is over!
WINNERS; in 14:29; The Midnight Sons!
PHANTOS & LUCIOS vs. IHOPBack in their own bodies, IHOP bicker in their corner about who is going to start. SYB is sporting a black eye, no doubt courtesy of the still fuming Dorothy Mantooth. Lucios to start for P&L, and suddenly SYB is happy to leave the ring to Skurge. The two big men lock up in a test of strength. They're a pound for pound and inch for inch match (in height, you perverts!). Lucios gets the advantage and begins to force Skurge into a corner, but the IHOP giant is just playing possum. At the last moment, he reverses things and slams Lucios into the turnbuckle. Will we see a clean break? I don't think so. BIG chop to Lucios. That fires Lucios up. He does the ol' switcheroo in the corner and lights up Skurge with a series of blistering chops. Literally blistering: Skurge's chest looks like Bryan Danielson's after his three matches with Roderick Strong. (Subliminal message: Watch ROH!). Skurge fights back with punches and a bit boot, then hoists Lucios and slams him down in a military press. Tag to SYB, who launches himself into the ring ... and hits a fist drop, then covers for 1 before Lucios throws him off like a rag doll. Skurge plants his face in his hands, and Dorothy Mantooth climbs onto the apron to yell at the "joo idiot". Lucios with the tag to Phantos, who hits a running dropkick to SYB, then a DDT, before whipping his dazed opponent into the ropes and blasting SYB with an enzugiri as SYB rebounds back into the ring. Cover gets 2.5 before Skurge breaks it up. That brings in Lucios, which distracts the referee, and Skurge stomps Phantos a few times for good measure. This lets SYB dominate for a while, though Dorothy remains unimpressed by his efforts, as her raucous abuse from the apron makes clear. The momentum suddenly changes when SYB charges Phantos as the latter is against the ropes. P dodges, and SYB slams into Mantooth, knocking her to the floor. Skurge drops off the apron to check on her, and when SYB pauses to ask his partner how Mantooth is, Phantos sneaks up and whips him toward Lucios, who has slipped into the ring. With Skurge still distracted by Mantooth, Lucios grabs SYB and slams him with a Power bomb, while Phantos climbs to the top rope for a leg drop on SYB! This one is over!
WINNERS IN 9:12 – PHANTOS AND LUCIOS!
BUNNY vs. OUTBACK JACK – OOWF Onslaught Championship Match“THUN-DAHHH!” The Russian crowd rises to their feet as Outback Jack rumbles down the ramp chugging a beer. He tosses the can out into the crowd and bounces off the ropes a couple times. “Psst. Hey. Listen…dadadadadadadadada…” “Stimulate” by Eminem blasts through the PA and ridiculous pyro goes off as the Onslaught Champion Bunny takes the elevator up to the ramp, and does a full front gainer onto the ramp. The crowd batshits themselves as Bunny flips a couple more times to get to the ring. Once inside, Bunny hops the turnbuckle to a HUGE ovation and does a DOUBLE MOONSAULT onto the mat before handing referee Sterling Glaw his belt. Glaw raises it high in the air, indicating that: This Match Will be for the OOWF Onslaught Championship. Both combatants look ready to go, and Glaw agrees. He calls for the bell, and WE’RE UNDERWAY!
Bunny looks to try the speed approach, as OBJ has a HUGE power advantage here. OBJ makes a lunge for Bunny, but Bunny is able to duck under and hit a dropkick to the back of OBJ’s head. Quickly, Bunny snaps of a hurricarana, and, of course, heads for the top. BUNNY BITE! He covers: 1, 2, no. Bunny quickly gets up, BUNNY HOP! Cover: 1, 2, no. BUNNY HOP! Cover: 1, 2, NO! Bunny heads to the top again, BUNNY HOLE! That might do it! Cover: 1, 2, NO! To the top Bunny goes again. BUNNYSAULT! NOBODY HOME! Bunny crashes and burns big time as OBJ gets some time to recover. Glaw starts a count.
Outback Jack is up first at 7, and gets to Bunny before he can get up. He beats Bunny about the head and shoulders with (totally) open fists, and lines him up against the turnbuckle. He gets off 4 chops, but you can’t hear them that well, because of, well, you know. OBJ hits a Running Bulldog and stomps on Bunny Garvin-style. He picks up the Champ and whips him into the ropes…BOOMERANG~! Good NIGHT he connected on that one. Bunny is done for! OBJ wants to make this decisive, and rolls Bunny onto his stomach…CROC HUNTER! He’s got it LOCKED! Bunny is in BIG TROUBLE! Bunny nearly gets to the ropes, but OBJ is able to roll through and keep the STF on. It’s almost tappin’ time for Bunny! Some how…some way…BUNNY FINALLY GETS TO THE ROPE! Glaw demands a break, and OBJ breaks it only when threatened with a DQ. Jack wastes no time and kicks Bunny out of the ring, before sliding out after him. Jack picks up the ailing Bunny and WHIPS~! Him into the STEEL STEPS! Bunny is in really rough shape. OBJ goes to the American Announce table and CLEARS AWAY MONITORS! He pulls Bunny onto the announce table, and DESTROYS HIM WITH A PILEDRIVER~! Glaw is screaming from the ring, and the count is up to 6! OBJ gets to the ring at 8 and breaks the count, but rolls back to the floor to attack Bunny. He gets over to Bunny’s lifeless corpse, but as soon as OBJ gets there…MOUNTAIN DEW MIST~!~!!! Jack is blinded and his face is covered with Green Mist. Bunny accesses the situation and decides to make a run for it! He’s into the crowd! Flying up the stairs…HE’S HEADED TO THE BUNNYWALK!!!!
Bunny is securely on the Bunny Walk while OBJ stumbles into the ring still blinded. Bunny makes a signal to the crowd, points to the sky, takes a deep breath and closes his eyes….2450 SPLASH CONNECTS~!
Russ: He’s dead…BAH GAWD he must be dead!
OBJ is down. Bunny is down. Glaw is beside himself, and it delays him starting a count. Both men are up at 9, and OBJ manages to orient himself and charge Bunny and winds up for a Boomerang, but somehow Bunny is able to counter into a Hurricarana. OBJ doesn’t stay down long and goes back toward Bunny. Bunny kicks OBJ and the gut…signals…and HITS a BUNNY DRIVER! OBJ is done, but Bunny can’t cover; he’s still recovering from before. Finally, Bunny goes over to cover, but from his back OBJ hits a LEG SWEEP, floats over and LOCKS ON THE CROC HUNTER AGAIN~! They’re in the middle of the ring and Bunny is just about done! Bunny somehow fights through the pain and grap hold of Jack by the armpits. He pulls, putting more pressure on himself, but also pulling OBJ over with him. Jack’s shoulders are on the Mat! MODIFIED BACKSLIDE~! Cover: 1, 2, 3!!!!! Glaw’s hand hits the mat for the third time just as Jack kicks out!
WINNER by PINFALL in 14:51 and STILL OOWF ONSLAUGHT CHAMPION…BUNNY!
