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Post by mooseheadjack on Jan 22, 2009 13:42:38 GMT -5
<Gm the Rick is walking down the hall when Moosehead Jack stops him>
GMtR: What?
MHJ: I need you to change the match this week
GMtR: Why should I do anything for you after what you pulled?
MHJ: Aren't you all about ratings?
GMtR: well.....
MHJ: Drink & Destroy versus me and Tytan, no disqualification
GMtR: Is that really a good idea?
MHJ: Do you care? Just make it happen
<Moose walks away>
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Post by mooseheadjack on Jan 22, 2009 13:43:02 GMT -5
*SFJ#143 is standing by with Blitz.*
SFJ: Blitz, only minutes after making your in-ring return to the OOWF, you became a member of the reformed Heroes’ Guild. Seeing that your last run in the OOWF was quite unsuccessful, do you think you can turn things around this time?
B: Turn things around? I’ve been keeping in tiptop shape, as I’m sure you saw from my promo video. I’m a part of a Guild that will be the most successful one yet, and cause the most pain for the evildoers of the OOWF.
SFJ: And who are these evildoers?
B: The Joos, Canadians and old people of the world (notthatthereisanythingwrongwiththat). Yes IHOP, that’s you.
SFJ: Old people?
B: Amnesiacs.
SFJ: Oh. What about Dorothy Mantooth?
B: *Winks at the camera*
SFJ: Ew.
*Awkward silence*
SFJ: So what’s your impression of your teammates so far?
B: I don’t do impressions.
SFJ: How would you compare them to you?
B: I have better people skills than Bryce Larson, I’m smoother with the ladies than Nayr, I masturbate more vigorously than Concrete TG, and the letter l occurs more times in my name than in Damon Wrath’s.
SFJ: I wouldn’t say your smoother than Nayr. You’ve been drooling like an idiot over my breasts this entire time.
B: But I’ve done it while constructing full sentences.
SFJ: Yeah, real smooth.
B: Wanna have sex?
SFJ: No.
B: Oh.
SFJ: Do you have anything else to say, I want to go interview Matte gush gush gush.
B: Gush?
SFJ: Swoon?
B: Orgasm violently?
SFJ: No.
B: Oh.
*SFJ gushes off, leaving Blitz.*
B: Looks like I have to make my speech on my own.
Since me leaving the OOWF, nothing seems to have changed much. Alexander Darling is still involved in some kind of storyline that requires lots of long promos, AA and Johnny are still breaking up, Poe’s relationship with Selena Gomez still seems improper and is creeping me out, and Selena Gomez is still insanely hot.
Now that I’m back there are pressing issues that have to be cleared up. Is Tytan a brother? When will The Heroes Guild get a proper stable locker room? Why does FF Capslock claim he’s a 3-time Intercontinental Champion? Why won’t there be a February PPV?
Nayr: Is your promo going anywhere, or are coming to the inauguration of The Heroes Guild as yet untitled lockerroom?
B: I’m trying to cut a promo that doesn’t involve me acting like an egocentric douchebag. So I’m just saying whatever comes into my head.
N: If I tried doing that my entire promo would be
B: Boobs.
N: Yeah.
B: Let’s go to the lockerroom inauguration. This promo blows.
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Post by mooseheadjack on Jan 22, 2009 13:43:28 GMT -5
Firewoman is LIFTING~! in the state of the art training facility that has everything one would need that OOWF brings with them everywhere, even overseas. She is on bench doing skullcrushers (lying triceps extension, but I like the other name better) when "Lionheart" Chris Evans comes in to also do some weight training.
"L"CE: Hey, Firewoman.
FW: Hey.
"L"CE: I'm glad I ran into you. I wanted to thank you for your advice about DH Magnusson.
FW: Mmm-Hmmm....
"L"CE: I'm really excited about being here. At SWA, Lance really talked this organization up. Said it still cared about actually booking wrestling matches, good matches too, that make sense, are entertaining....
FW: Mmm-hmmm...
"L"CE: I mean, yeah, some of the guys are kinda thinking that this week's card doesn't make sense, and there's some sort of thing about coffee going on that I don't quite understand... but in general I think, well have you seen what they're doing in those other more television-centered promotions? I mean--
Firewoman gets done with her set, grabs her GNC towel and bottle of Aquafina and takes a drink and moves to the seated calf raises.
"L"CE: What am I saying. Of course you see them. You probably watch Monday night for Jericho. Oo, I hope that's not a touchy subject, what with him getting fired this week.
FW: Mmm-hmm...I'm sure it'll work itself out.
"L"CE: Yeah...
Firewoman starts her set, and Evans looks around awkwardly for a bit. He finally gets on an exercise bike that is conveniently nearby, and pedals in silence for a while, while Firewoman does a few sets. Finally, he breaks the silence.
"L"CE: So...you and Tyson....
FW: Mmm-hmmm....
"L"CE: Well, it's just that.... [Evans stops pedaling.] ... There are photos of you and Kincaid all over the walls still at SWA. You were an awesome team, and it just seems like...well, if you could put your differences aside....
Firewoman has stopped working her calves and moved on to hanging leg raises, because we know how important ABS are.
FW: This is what I get for forgetting my .mp3 player. I have to listen to some mark gushing all over ancient history?
"L"CE: I'm not being a mark. It's just....well, we watched tapes and you guys had some chemistry....you were spot on.....It's just a shame that.
FW: [without stopping her exercise] You know what's a shame, Cubheart? Because I know the real "Lionheart," and you ain't that, yet. You will be, but not yet. What is a shame is that Tyson is too selfish to get his head on straight to do the job the way it needs to be done.
"L"CE: I don't get it. He's clean now.
FW: And you buy that? Look, okay. Maybe he's not using now. Maybe. Hell, I hope he's not. [She takes a break]. That doesn't mean he's addressed whatever the real issue is. He's still running from it. He's a dry drunk.
"L"CE: A dry...
FW: Yeah. He may not be drinking, or smoking, or pill popping, or whatever other multitude of ways he's found to medicate himself, but he's still avoiding the larger issue, still avoidiing, denying, lying to himself and others.... until he stops doing that? I got no use for him.
Firewoman goes back to her ab-work. Evans looks thoughtful for a while.
"L"CE: So what is the larger issue?
FW: Who am I, Dr. Phil? I have no idea. Only Tyson can answer that.....damn, I do sound like Dr. Phil....
"L"CE: No, you sound really harsh.
She stops again and jumps down off the stool
FW: Have you ever hurt anyone in the ring?
"L"CE: Well, a couple of times. Nothing serious, and it was accidental. I felt really badly--
FW: Yeah. You did. Probably apologized....any hospital time?
"L"CE: No, not that--
FW: But if you had, you'd have visited right?
"L"CE: Of course!
FW: Good. You understand what it means to be a "partner" in this business. Don't forget that. Let me tell you harsh. Harsh is having your partner, who you trust completely both in and out of the ring, drop you on your head because he's too drunk to stand, much less catch you. Repeatedly. Harsh is laying in a hospital bed, wanting to puke, but afraid that will make the pounding in your head even worse. And that doesn't even come close to the fear that all those whispers about 'concussion syndrome' mean that this feeling will never ever go away, and you'll have to give up the one thing you've found that you are good at and that gives you a snowball's chance to get out of the hellhole of a life you've had. And you know what else is harsh? The person that put you in that position, the partner you trusted completely inside and outside of the ring? Can't even be bothered to stop by to see how you are, or even pick up a fucking phone to let you know he fucking cared, or even noticed. That, Cubheart, is harsh.
Firewoman looks around and find the ninja cam
FW: C'mon, get over here, quit lurking behind the door over there. [She speaks directly to the camera, but they're facing the mirror in the gym.]. Tyson, you keep droning on about trying to ruin my career. Big surprise. You've been trying to do that since we met. At least you're being honest about something now. But you failed. Like you always do. And you'll fail again. And again, and again, and again.
She punctuates each 'again' with a kick to the mirror. A crack begins to form.
FW: So keep talking. Keep bragging. When I got out of that hospital bed, I promised myself that I wouldn't let you, or anyone, do that to me again. And I keep my promises. So bring it on, because until you are laying there wondering if you're ever going to feel normal again? We won't even be close to even.
And she punctuates that last point with a huge punch to the mirror, which shatters it, sending glass everywhere. Evans ducks. Firewoman's knuckles are bleeding.
FW: Got it?
"L"CE: Uh..yeah.
FW: Good, there's something I gotta take care of.
Firewoman storms out and down the hall, not noticing the blood dripping off her hand. She busts into the RunDEA Suites by Starwood Hotels, where the entire RunDEA contingent is sitting around doing...well, RunDEA things.
Alexis: Fire, your hand!
FW: Oh yeah...Lucky, I left my stuff in the gym, can you--
Lucky: I'll be right back.
Alexander: You should have that looked at. [Phantos is on it, bringing the first aid kit in]
FW: In a minute. I have something to say. I forgot something. I let my argument with Alexis cloud my judgment, and I forgot what it meant to be-- Ow!!
Phantos: Hold still. Where did this glass come from?
FW: The point is, I'm sorry I let things get to me. It won't happen again.
Firewoman storms off towards her locker room, with Phantos following. Everyone else just looks around at each other.
DM: Davin Moreland is confused...and strangely, Davin Moreland is otherwise speechless.
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Post by mooseheadjack on Jan 22, 2009 13:43:49 GMT -5
(Johnathan Steele sits in a hotel room in Japan cutting a promo via a web cam.)
Steele: Well...well...well...it seems I may have been barking up the wrong tree with you Firewoman. It seems the history with yuo and Kincaid may be that much more interesting. So, maybe I will run with that one. So, that is the reason you have a hard time trusting anyone? Afraid someone is going to drop you on the head again...and then leave you for dead. It's so sad...so now you ran back to DEA. Apparently yhou think those guys are the only ones you can trust. Look at how quick they were willing to send you packing...Davin still has trust issues with you. The one thing that I can tell you is he needs you. He needs you to make himself feel better. Otherwise he would treat you just like he treats everyone else.
That is how someone on the outside sees the drama of RUN DEA.
(Fade)
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Post by mooseheadjack on Jan 22, 2009 13:44:06 GMT -5
(Moose and Tytan are sitting in some dark dive kind of bar. You know the kind where there is barely any lighting except for over any table and the bar. Then you look around and see the clientele that is there any you recognize one or two of them from the local most wanted list. There's a bottle of whiskey sitting next to each of them. They keep on doing shots as they talk.)
Tytan: Nice place. So are you a regular here?
Moose: My regular drinking spot is not the best place to visit when you just want a drink.
Tytan: Point taken. So you want this match to be a no DQ?
Moose: What do you have a problem with that?
Tytan: Hell no. I have been looking for a good fight lately.
Moose: Other then Firwoman?
Tytan: Like Kincaid said I need to keep a clear head...so what a better way then to beat the hell out of some chumps.
Moose: Tyson has got some other issues he needs to get over before he can talk. But I will tell you these guys will bring it.
Tytan: So will I. And you know I got your back in this fight.
Moose: Appreciate it.
(The two toast and down the last of their bottles.)
Moose: Ready to get the hell out of here?
Tytan: What? (sarcastically) I was just starting to feel like this was home.
Moose: The night has only started.
Tytan: Then let's go.
(They leave and fade)
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Post by mooseheadjack on Jan 22, 2009 13:44:39 GMT -5
(Moose and Tytan leave the bar and walk out to the parking lot.) Tytan: Well Moose you invited me out here. Now where do you want to go? Moose: It's all a suprise my friend. Now come on I'm driving. (Tytan follows Moose to a darkened part of the parking lot where he sees a couple of cars.) Tytan: Okay where's your car? (Moose smiles and leads him over to.) Moose: Here it is. Tytan: Wow, impressive. Moose: (tossing Tytan a beer from the back.) Now get in and let's go we got a long night ahead of us. Tytan: Sounds like this could be fun. (The music gets turned on and it's "Radar Love" not the White Lion version but the original Golden Earing Version.)
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Post by mooseheadjack on Jan 22, 2009 13:45:48 GMT -5
<Moose and Tytan take off and drive across town for a bit, passing the nicer strip clubs>
Tyt: Uhh, Moose, those are some nice places there….
MHJ: No, I know a place
<after a few more minutes, they cross into the seedier part of town and Moose pulls into a nearly abandoned parking lot. Tytan steps out of the car and just stares>
Tyt: Why are we at an abandoned strip club?
MHJ: It’s not abandoned. I know the guy who runs this place, I used to bounce here
Tyt: I am not surprised. This place looks like it should be condemned!
MHJ: We going in or not?
Tyt: Fine
<they go into the club and just like the outside, the inside is less than spectacular. The people inside are less than spectacular, and needless to say, the women dancing are less than spectacular>
Tyt: Wow, uh Moose, I appreciate the effort but these women……is that LD Williams mother?
MHJ: I don’t think it is a good idea to be talking abo……oh…..hi Mrs. Williams, you bouncing tonight?
MW: Moose! Well how the hell are ya! Hey, hey. How you doin', buddy? Hell, kid, I’m doin’ great! I'm in hog heaven.
Tyt: Uh….no offense but this place is kind of a toilet
MW: Yeah, tell me about it. This place has a sign over the urinal that says ''Don't eat the big, white mint.''
<there is a big commotion when a fight breaks out between two drunks>
MW: Stay cooI, kid. - Gotta go. I'll see ya. Later.
<Tytan and Moose watch Mrs. Williams run over and DESTROY the two drunks, then drag them out of the building by their hair, and toss them into the parking lot>
Tyt: THAT is a scary woman
<Moose and Tytan get quiet again and enjoy the “scenery” for a few minutes before the door opens and a group of people walk in. The camera pans around and we can see that it is Bryce Larson and Nayr, with two VERY reluctant looking Sexy Female Journalists as dates. Clearly they lost a bet. Nayr and Larson walk up to the bar to get some drinks, and don’t seem to notice Moose and Tytan there>
BL: Ok, follow my lead and you will get to touch REAL LIVE BOOBIES tonight!
<the two of them break into giddy excitement>
Bartender: You two old enough to be in here?
BL: Do you know who I am? I am “The King of the Indies” Bryce “The Bad Ass Dragon” Larson!
Bartender:……….
BL: I have wrestled all over the world!
Bartender:………
BL: Yes, yes I am old enough to be in here
Bartender: And you?
Nayr: Ye…..yessir!
Bartender: I need to see some ID
<the two of them proudly show off their ID’s, the bartender is still not impressed>
Bartender: Fine, what will you have?
BL: Two Long Island Ice teas for the ladies, I will have a Black Jack on the rocks, and what about you Nayr?
N: I….uhhh
BL: Come on, tell the man!
N: Well, you see, I….uhhhh
BL: For the love of god, you have never had a drink before have you?
N: NOT TRUE! We once stole some Boone’s Farm from my folks wine rack! We drank almost HALF the bottle! That was a great night of WoW let me tell ya!
BL:<shaking his head> Give him a Screwdriver, and go easy on the vodka
<The bartender brings the drinks and hands them to Larson>
B: That’ll be $25.75
BL: I have my hands full, pay the man Nayr!
<Nayr pays and they all head back to their seats. A few more minutes pass and Moose looks at Tytan>
MHJ: Wanna have some fun?
Tyt: Sure, what do you have in mind?
MHJ: Follow me
<Moose and Tytan walk over to the table where Nayr and Bryce Larson are trying – unsuccessfully – to impress the Sexy Female Journalists. Bryce and Nayr stop when they notice the hulking Tytan standing there>
MHJ: Mind if we dance with your dates?
Nay: <terrified> Why no, not at all, I uhhhh
<just then Tytan grabs the table and pulls it out of the floor and tosses it aside. Moose and Tytan step toward Nayr and Larson>
Tyt: If I were in your shoes I’d be…..
Nay: LEAVING! What a great idea!
<Larson and Nayr jump to their feet and fly out the door screaming the whole way. Moose and Tytan watch them go, then offer their hands to the SFJ’s, who take them.>
Tyt: Ok Moose, we hit your club, now it is time to head somewhere a little more…….upscale. Ladies, how would you like a night out?
<the SFJ’s shrug and the four of them head out the door into the night>
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Post by mooseheadjack on Jan 22, 2009 13:46:09 GMT -5
(Tytan, Moose and the now Happy Sexy Female Journalist are in Moose's Car.)
Tytan: Where to now?
Moose: It's 112 miles to Detroit, we got a full tank of gas, half a pack of cigarettes, it's dark, and we're wearing sunglasses.
Tytan: And I have the Ultimo Inc. credit card so...Hit it.
(They cruise off to the sounds of Mustang Sally and the SFJ's cheering. They totally had an upgrade on their dates tonight.)
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Post by mooseheadjack on Jan 22, 2009 13:47:02 GMT -5
*Fade in to footage of Bryce Larson’s interview with Sarah Farrah Jacoby. We see Bryce setting up a date with her, and we see Bryce giving her back the hotel room key.*
Bryce Larson arrives at a hotel room, and pulls out a key. He enters, and we see Farrah sitting on the bed, wearing a robe.F: Hey! Did you show the Mormon twins a good time? BL: I knew from the start that things wouldn’t go well. F: Why? What happened. BL: Well, Nayr came along-- F: You took Nayr? Aren’t you guys feuding? BL: It’s complicated. Anyway, we get into the rental car... *We fade into footage of Bryce & Nayr picking up the Mormon twins in the hotel lobby...**Fade back into the hotel room.*F: Those guys might be more their speed anyway. BL: But they’re Mormon! F: And? Just ‘cause they’re fresh out of BYU doesn’t mean they can’t party. But I do appreciate you agreeing to take them out. It means a lot to me. BL: No problem, baby. Sorry about Nayr. F: What’s his deal? When I interviewed him, he kept staring at my rack! BL: Well…two things. First, it’s Nayr. He doesn’t exactly have a ton of, um, experience with the fairer sex. Second, he’s nearly a midget, so his eyes are pretty much at that level, so he could have been looking forward. F: True. BL: Oh, and a third point. Have you seen your rack? I’m sure every guy stares at it. F: They do! But for some reason, it’s okay when you do it. BL: I appreciate that, because I don’t plan to stop! F: Don’t worry, I don’t want you to. BL: Hey, at least our first date went well, right? *Fade into footage of Bryce & Farrah’s first date. We see footage of them at dinner...footage of Bryce making Farrah laugh... footage of Nayr, Blitz, Damon Wrath and Concrete TG sitting at a nearby table, laughing like immature little children...footage of Bryce and Farrah talking at their hands brush together...footage of Bryce dropping Farrah off at her hotel room as Farrah gives him the room key again...we see Farrah tell Bryce “I want you to use it.” We then fade back into the bedroom.* F: I guess you’re right about Nayr. BL: He's really not that bad. Really. F: You say that, but yet you’re feuding with him? BL: I can like him and not want to be his partner. He kept fucking it up for us! F: Is it really all his fault? BL: You’re starting to sound like Paul. F: Paul sounds like a smart person. BL: He’s got a brilliant mind for wrestling, he was just a terrible business man. F: Really? That’s too bad. BL: Yeah, it is. So...you wanna go someplace, grab some food? Farrah gets up and takes off her robe, revealing some sexy lingerie:
BL: Or…we can stay in. F: Stay in? Let’s. Farrah then pushes the camera man out of the room. For the last 5 feet, his camera focuses squarely on her chest.F: Stop staring at my rack! *Fade to black as the door shuts.*
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Post by mooseheadjack on Jan 22, 2009 13:47:27 GMT -5
**Matte is standing outside of the GM's door, looking at the card on paper.**
Matte: So I'm in a gauntlet... And I'm the... second of three dudes wrestling. So I guess I'm out of luck for this week... good luck against Crete, Bryce... and I'll see where I'm at next week.
**Matte leaves. He just... leaves.**
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Post by mooseheadjack on Jan 22, 2009 13:47:44 GMT -5
**A Decent-Looking Female Journalist approaches Matte on his way out the door.**
DLFJ: Matte, you're in a gauntlet this week, going up against...
Matte: Bryce, I know.
DLFJ: Yea... What's your plan going into the match?
Matte: My plan is to watch him fuck up whichever jobber he's up against, walk through the curtain myself and get into the ring with him, put up a fuckin' struggle until he manages to get the best of me, then take my bow, watch him and Crete go at it, and come back next week and get myself into some other shit.
DLFJ: So you're not planning on getting the win over Bryce?
Matte: No. It's a gauntlet and I'm the second of three going up against him. It's basic fact. I'm not getting the win, I'm just being put there to weaken him up before his fight against Crete in the final round.
DLFJ: Don't you think that maybe you were put into the match because he was talking shit on you and the booker thought that maybe you could get the better of him?
Matte: No. Should I think that?
DLFJ: Well, it might give you some much needed confidence.
Matte: I don't need confidence. I know when I can do work and I know when I'm just a part of the work as a whole. This time isn't my time; maybe next time will be.
**Matte turns to leave.**
DLFJ: So you're not walking out?
Matte: I'm getting a hamburger. Relax.
**Matte leaves.**
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Post by mooseheadjack on Jan 22, 2009 13:48:11 GMT -5
<Matte turns around to leave and Moose BLASTS him in the face with a barbed wire baseball bat! Matte hits the ground like he has been shot. Moose falls on top of him and out of nowhere a referee appears....>
ONE TWO THREE.....WINNER AND NEW DDT IRON MAN HEAVY METAL CHAMPION - MOOSEHEAD JACK
<The referee hands Moose the title, then disappears, Moose gets a few more kicks in>
MHJ: There, now you are a part of the story
<Moose slings the title over his shoulder and turns and goes back into his locker room>
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Post by mooseheadjack on Jan 22, 2009 13:48:40 GMT -5
Poe and Selena are SITTING on a raised tomb in the dark, frigidly cold church cemetery in Baltimore. Selena is wearing Poe’s leather duster. SG: I’m cold…and I’m bored. Poe: Patience my goddess. SG: Where is this dude? Poe: He’ll be here. SG: Are we gonna go see your mom after? Poe: No, she doesn’t live close enough. We need to get back to Michigan. I need to prepare for my match. SG: I like your mom. Poe: She likes you. SG: I heard what she said to you…about you getting married. Poe turns his head slowly towards Selena, not sure what she actually heard as she continues. SG: Every mother wants to see her children marry; it’s the circle of life. Poe: You’re not gonna break into song are you? SG: No, but I can’t wait to get married. Poe: It’s not the Norman Rockwell many people think it is. SG: Pfft, like I’d marry a dude named Norman. Oh Norman, oh Norman… Poe is about to correct Selena and explain to her who Norman Rockwell is when the Toaster finally arrives. Poe sees Selena point and about to say something loudly so he quickly grabs her and covers her mouth with his hand as she mumbles underneath it. Poe: shhh… Poe and Selena watch in silence as the Toaster lays the traditional three red roses on Edgar Allan Poe’s grave and then toasts with a glass of cognac. He kneels in front of the tombstone for a few moments in reflection before leaving. Once gone, Poe and Selena hop off the raised tomb and approach Edgar Allan Poe’s grave, the only sound being the rustling of Poe’s duster, worn by Selena dragging on the grass behind her as it’s too big for her. Poe kneels in front of the tombstone and gives the sign of the crucifix as Selena stands behind him watching. Poe: Happy birthday m’lord. For the two-hundreth anniversary of your birth shall mark the beginning of the end of mine enemies. So it is written, so it shall come to pass. SG: Yeah, and you’re gonna kick their ass too. Poe is silent for a few moments. Poe: “In visions of the dark night I have dreamed of joy departed; But a waking dream of life and light Hath left me broken-hearted. Ah! What is not a dream by day To him whose eyes are cast On things around him, with a ray Turned back upon the past? That holy dream, that holy dream, While all the world were chiding, Hath cheered me as a lovely beam A lonely spirit guiding. What though that light, thro’ storm and night, So trembled from afar – What could there be more purely bright In Truth’s day-star?” Poe is once again quiet. After a few moments of reflection, he stands, holding his hand out to Selena. She takes it and they leave, making their way out of the cemetery in complete silence, except for the duster dragging along the grass, wishing Happy 200th Birthday to Edgar Allan Poe. OOC: Poem lyrics from “A Dream” by Edgar Allan Poe.
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Post by mooseheadjack on Jan 22, 2009 13:49:07 GMT -5
Bryce Larson enters GM The Rick's office, but is talking to Erlana first.
BL: Where's Rick?
E: He's not here, why?
BL: I got a message that he wanted to see me.
E: Actually...that was from me. I figured it made more sense if I made it come from him.
BL: Um...okay. What did you want?
E: Did you read the note I slipped you the last time you talked to Rick?
BL: Yeah, but I didn't get it. I got the part with your name, Erlana. I didn't get the ten numbers, separated by strategically placed dashes.
E: ...
BL: ...
E: ...
BL: What?!
E: That was my phone number you moron! I wanted you to call me!
BL: Oh! Shit, I didn't get that at all.
E: Obviously.
BL: So why did you want me to call you?
E: I needed to talk to you about something.
BL: Oh, okay. Well, I'm here now, shoot.
E: Nope. Rick can get back any minute now, and there's too many cameras around now. Just call me when the time's right.
BL: When the time's right? When the fuck is that?
E: You'll know when it is.
BL: I'll know...wait, the fuck?
E: [Stares down Bryce's eyes, moves toward him, but doesn't make any contact.] You'll know when the time is right, Bryce. You'll know.
BL: Okay, if you say so.
E: I do. [Winks] Now scram before Rick gets back, I'm sure he'd love to see you again.
BL: Right...um, sure. Talk to you soon, I guess.
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Post by mooseheadjack on Jan 22, 2009 13:49:49 GMT -5
(Moose and Tytan are driving down the highway making their way to Detroit with the two SFJ in the back seat.) SFJ#1: Are we their yet? I feel like we have been driving all weekend. SFJ#2: Thanks for rescuing us from those losers but I thought we were going to have some fun? Moose: Damn will you two just shut up. If I knew how annoying you two were going to be we would have left you there with the those two. (Tytan and Moose look at each other and smile. The next thing you know Moose's care pulls over and they dump the Two SFJs off on the side of the rode and then pull off leaving them behind.) Tytan: Besides we were going to be abler to have any real fun with them hanging on. Moose: To true my friend...to true. Tytan: Next stop Motor City Casino Hotel. Moose: And then... Both: The Penthouse Club! (They keep on driving and arrive at the Motor City Casino Hotel)
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Post by mooseheadjack on Jan 22, 2009 13:50:10 GMT -5
<Moose parks the car and he and Tytan get out and head toward the casino. Moose slings the DDT Iron Man Heavy Metal Title over his shoulder>
Tyt: You really going to take that inside?
MHJ: Hey, we stopped back at the arena so I could win it, I am taking it with me. Beside, whats the worst that could happen?
Tyt: You could spend the entire night fighting off drunken patrons who want to win your title
MHJ: I am still waiting for the bad part
Tyt:<smiling> Let's go
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Post by mooseheadjack on Jan 22, 2009 13:50:28 GMT -5
(After heading up and checking out there rooms. This is on Ultimo Inc's Credit card so they might as well enjoy it they head down to the Casino to see if they can get more spending money.)
(Moose heads down one way when all of a sudden.)
Bam! bottle upside the head by a nearby Hot Cocktail waitress. Moose stumbles and hits the ground and once again a ref comes out of no where.
ONE TWO THREE.....WINNER AND NEW DDT IRON MAN HEAVY METAL CHAMPION - HOT COCKTAIL WAITRESS
Moose smiles and looks at her.
Moose: Two out of three falls.
(Surprisingly she agrees. Moose then returns the favor.)
ONE TWO THREE.....WINNER AND NEW DDT IRON MAN HEAVY METAL CHAMPION - MOOSEHEAD JACK
Hot Cocktail Waitress: So now we are even one apiece.
(Tytan happens to be walking by sees what is going on. Shakes his head and heads off to the big prize slot machine. The one where the only time you see anyone win is on Television. He looks at it and wonders.)
Tytan: You know what...what the hell let's try it. Blazing Sevens can't be that bad.
(Fade out)
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Post by mooseheadjack on Jan 22, 2009 13:50:46 GMT -5
(Tytan puts his quarters in and pulls the handle....)
Buzzers and sirens go off.
ONE TWO THREE.....WINNER AND NEW DDT IRON MAN HEAVY METAL CHAMPION - HOT COCKTAIL WAITRESS
Moose: Damn! Tytan you had to go and win like that! (To Hot Cocktail waitress) You are one up on me, time for paybacks!
ONE TWO THREE.....WINNER AND NEW DDT IRON MAN HEAVY METAL CHAMPION - MOOSEHEAD JACK
(Tytan realizes he just one the big jackpot.)
Tytan: Well damn 200,000 dollars. This is turning out to be one hell of a night!
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Post by mooseheadjack on Jan 22, 2009 13:51:11 GMT -5
<We rejoin the action in the casino. Tytan wanders off to play the high-stakes machines, while Moose ducks a swing from the Hot Cocktail Waitress and catches her with a heart punch to end her threat to the title. Moose wanders off and the Invisible Ninja Cameraman follows him. Moose takes several turns, and ends up heading down a dark hallway, then down some stairs, and it looks like through the boiler room (was that Spin Hansen?) and then finally to an old wooden door with one of those sliding doors on it. Moose knocks twice, pauses, then knocks once, then pauses again, then finishes it with three knocks. The little door opens and a set of eyes appear
Unknown Eyes: They don't play the same games here as at them regular casinos.
MHJ: A fool and his money are soon parted
<the little slot closes and the door opens, a HUGE man opens the door and immediately recognizes Moose>
Man: Moose! How the hell are ya?
MHJ: Doing well Mikey, doing well. Still the same deal here huh?
Mikey Styner: this place is great.
MHJ: They don't play this at the Mirage.
MS: No they don’t. Where else can you get a casino run by Former OOWF Wrestlers?
<Moose wanders to the first table where we see LI standing there next to a sign that says “Pick a Number”>
MHJ: Pick a number? I'm great at that.
<Moose stares at LI, concentrating the whole time, finally Moose slowly speaks>
MHJ: Seven
LI: Nine
MHJ: DAMN!
<LI immediately attacks and catches Moose with a chop to the chest. LI pulls Moose to his feet and sets him up for a thrust kick, but Moose sidesteps and LI kicks the pillar. Moose grabs LI and spins him around, kicks him in the gut, and DROPS him with a DDT. Moose gets to his feet and dusts himself off, picks up the DDT title and moves on to the next table where we see Microplay standing with a coin>
MHJ: Coin toss? These are my games.
MP: Fifty-fifty chance of winning
MHJ: Ok then, how bout this, I will bet my DDT Iron Man Heavy Metal title against your replica Intercontinental Title
MP: It’s not a replica, its actually…..
MHJ: Yes or no?
MP: You’re on! Call it in the air!
MHJ: Heads!
<The coin lands on heads, but Microplay tries to flip it over before Moose sees it. Moose snarls at trying to be cheated and takes the DDT Iron Man Heavy Metal Title and SLAMS it upside Microplay’s head. Microplay is OUT and Moose scoops up the replica Intercontinental title and slings it over his other shoulder, then moves on>
MHJ: Let’s see what else there is, oh hey, War! Me and LD used to play this. I'm in!
<The dealer turns around and we see Blackdragon dealing the cards>
BD: Here we go.
<Moose flips an eight, and BD flips a ten>
BD: Mine.
MHJ: That's fast. Give me another.
<Moose flips an Jack, BD flips a Queen>
BD: Mine again.
MHJ: One more
<Moose flips an Ace and smirks. BD looks hard at Moose, then flips and ace himself. BD’s eyes narrow and he stares at Moose>
BD: War.
<with that, BD jumps over the table and attacks Moose, catching him with an elbow between the eyes, sending Moose to the floor. BD pulls Moose to his feet and hits a release Belly to belly suplex that sends Moose crashing through a table. Blackdragon stands on one of the tables and tries a diving head butt, but Moose grabs the replica Intercontinental title and catches him in the face with it as he falls. Moose rolls a stunned Blackdragon onto a table and sets him up and PILEDRIVES him through the table! None of the other patrons even seem to notice. Moose gets to his feet, once again dusts himself off, and collects his titles and moves on to the next table where Justin Sane is running Rock, Paper Scissors>
MHJ: Ok, I’m in
<one, two, three>
JS: Dealer has rock. Pay paper. Congratulations Mr. Jack
MHJ: one more kid
<one, two, three> JS: Dealer has rock, paper, pay scissors. Congratulations again Mr. Jack
MHJ: Good luck kid
<Moose turns to walk away and Justin Sane tries to jump over the table to attack him for the DDT Iron Man Heavy Metal Title, but he loses his footing and ends up crashing to the ground face first. Moose just looks at him and shakes his head. Moose makes his way around the room playing the games, winning some, losing some, but inevitably almost always ending up in a war. Ax-Man charges from behind the guess the color wheel and attacks Moose with a barbed wire bat, but Moose fights him off. Hardbody Harris and Chris Alt are running the Name That Tune booth, they start to attack, then realize they are faces and just let Moose pass. Finally Moose works his way to the corner where he sees Morte sitting there reading a newspaper>
MHJ: How’s it going Morte?
Mor: Can’t complain. You come to get on the bus? I hear you have been a little……..lost lately
MHJ: No, not me Morte. I may not have a whole lot going on at the moment, but I am nowhere near the bus.
Mor: Fair enough. You got anyone for me to pick up?
MHJ: There are a few I am keeping my eye on. When the time comes, I will give you a call.
<Moose and Morte bump knuckles and Moose heads back to the door where Mikey Styner greets him>
MS: Moose! You had your fill?
MHJ: Yeah I think I am good for the night. Plus I should probably go make sure Tytan is staying out of trouble. You take care Mikey
<Styner opens the door and Moose leaves, battered and bloody, but happy. Moose winds his way through the halls and through the boiler room again (that WAS Spin Hansen) and finally makes it back onto the floor of the casino. He finds Tytan, which is not very hard. There is a large crowd around the big man, as he is having exceptional success at the black jack table. Moose walks up to him>
Tyt: Holy shit Moose, what happened to you?
MHJ: It was a good night
Tyt: Is that the WWF Intercontinental title?
MHJ: Something like that
Tyt: Damn! It WAS a good night for you!
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Post by mooseheadjack on Jan 22, 2009 13:51:35 GMT -5
(After one hell of a night at the casino. Tytan heads to cash out with Moose catching up and joining him with Hot Cocktail waitress on his arm.)
Bank: Well there you go Mr...Tytan that is 300,000 dollars.
(Moose looking on.)
Moose: Well it seems we have all had a good start to the night.
Tytan: (turns and shakes his head at who Moose has with him.) I see you had some fun too. Post-victory celebration?
Moose: Tytan...Catalina.
(They shake hands)
Cat: I couldn't help myself.
Tytan: It's all good. Shall we take this party elsewhere?
Moose: The Penthouse Club?
Cat: I'm in!
(Moose and Tytan look at each other)
Both: Excellent!
(Pit Boss heads over to Tytan and Moose.)
PitBoss: Mr. Tytan your limo is outside waiting for you.
Tytan: Thanks, Sam. (Hands him $100.) Well, let's go then.
(They take the limo to the next stop.)
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Post by mooseheadjack on Jan 22, 2009 13:52:10 GMT -5
*FADE IN TO THE PALATIAL IHOP LOCKER ROOM WHERE THE MEMBERS OF IHOP ARE SLEEPING IN THEIR PALATIAL BEDROOMS*
<SYB wakes up in a panic and heads over to Skurge’s room, where he sees his partner sleeping on sheets with a familiar black & orange pattern on them.>
SYB: Hey Akili, get up.
<Skurge doesn’t move and is talking in his sleep>
Skurge: I’m gonna kiss you on the lips, Kenny Rogers.
SYB: Skurge.
<Skurge is still out>
Skurge: I’ll kill you, Leonard Nimoy.
SYB: WAKE THE FUCK UP!
Skurge: <sits up and rubs his eyes> Hey asscock, what’s going on? The fuck you wake me up for, eh?
SYB: I need to talk to you. After the poker game, I went to the Catalina Wine Mixer.
<Off screen we hear The Amnesiac shout “POW” in his room>
Skurge: <Yawns> And?
SYB: Well they had a screening of The Wrestler so I decided to check it out.
Skurge: Oot.
SYB: You’re missing my point, shitdick. The movie like spoke to me or something.
Skurge: Did it say let your partner go back to sleep so he can fully prepare for OOWF MidWeek Mayhem Live! From Springfield, MI?
SYB: No.
Skurge: …
SYB: Look we’ve been chimps for a long time.
Skurge: Long time.
SYB: I just don’t want to look back 20 years and wonder where it all went.
Skurge: Your hairline?
SYB: You fucking goat cock. Why the FUCK do I even bother?
<SYB walks out in a huff as Skurge laughs himself back into a deep sleep>
*FADE*
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Post by mooseheadjack on Jan 22, 2009 13:52:55 GMT -5
*Green screen footage of Dr. Martin Luther King speaking* Selena: I have a dream Davin Moreland: that one day this nation will rise up Chris Cole: and live out the true meaning of its creed FireWoman: hold these truths to be self-evident LD Williams: that all men are created equal. Erlana: I have a dream Ric Flair: that my four little children Poe: will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin Alexis Darling: but by the content of their character. Lucky: I have a dream Spin Hanson: that one day on the red hills of Georgia Moosehead Jack: the sons of former slaves Alexander Darling: and the sons of former slave owners Phantos: will be able to sit down together Lucios: at a table of brotherhood. Skurge: This is our hope. Chris Evans: This is the faith that I go back to the South with. FF Capslock: With this faith we will be able to hew out of the mountain of despair Fezzik: a stone of hope. Damon Wrath: With this faith Curt “The Golden God” Schilling: we will be able to transform the jangling discords of our nation Matte: into a beautiful symphony of brotherhood. Amnesiac: With this faith Blitz: we will be able to work together Bryce Larson: to pray together Tyson Kincaid : to struggle together Jonathon Steele: to go to jail together Donovan Viper: to stand up for freedom together Dorothy Mantooth: knowing that we will be free one day. Tytan: Let freedom ring Nayr the Halfling Paladin: And when this happens Eric O'Mac: and when we allow freedom ring “Concrete” Takaken Gryphon: when we let it ring from every village and every hamlet Outback Jack: from every state Attitude Adjuster: and every city Johnny Adrenaline: we will be able to speed up that day Olympic Gold Medalist Shawn Johnson: when all of God's children DH Magnusson: black men and white men S.Y.B: Jews and Gentiles Seamus McNasty: Protestants and Catholics Samantha Darling: will be able to join hands Biggs: and sing in the words of the old Negro spiritual Stank: Free at last! Free at last! Thank God Almighty, we are free at last!" GM TheRick: On behalf of the OOWF, I'd like everyone to join us in celebrating the legacy of Dr. Martin Luther King.
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Post by mooseheadjack on Jan 22, 2009 13:54:04 GMT -5
*Davin Moreland is WATCHING~! tape on the Sony Multimedia Center. Moonbeam has a MIC!*
SFJ420: Dude...Davin...can you do an interview or something?
DM: Seriously?
SFJ420: C'Mon. You've barely said anything all week.
DM: Ok. Fine. Let Davin Moreland know when Moonbeam is ready.
*He stands up and waits. Moonbeam appears to be talking to herself*
SFJ420: Ok Ready. I'm here with 2-Time Defending OOWF World Heavyweight Champion Davin Moreland.
DM: Well done, Moonbeam.
SFJ420: I've been, like, practicing and stuff.
DM: It shows.
SFJ420: Davin, you've got a tag match with Poe and Eric coming up. Care to comment?
DM: Sure...uh...well....dammit, cut.
*Moonbeam makes the "cut" sign to the camera*
DM: Davin Moreland's got nothing. Davin Moreland has TRIED and just has absolutely nothing.
SFJ420: You could just throw coffee on them.
DM: DAVIN MORELAND ALREADY DID THAT!
SFJ420: Oh yeah, I totally remember that now.
DM: Alright fine, let's get on with this.
SFJ420: Ok *waits* Any comments on your tag match with Poe and Eric this week?
DM: Davin Moreland's got comments. Davin Moreland is a wordsmith. Poe the Kid Toucher! Eric the McMahon! Davin Moreland will hit you so hard....that DAVIN MORELAND WILL HIT YOU VERY HARD!
SFJ420: Are you serious?
DM: They can't all be winners.
*fade*
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Post by mooseheadjack on Jan 22, 2009 13:54:29 GMT -5
**Fear Us and Chris Cole are still drinking.**
CC: “So why doesn’t she just join then? I mean she travels with us most of the time now.”
LDW: “Wrestling, even Moose’s style, is a little too tame for Ma. Besides, Rick refused.”
OBJ: “Apparently the insurance company threatened to drop the OOWF as soon as Rick mentioned her name.”
CC: “Psychopaths like Moose and Poe are okay, but your mother is over the line?”
LDW: “Pretty much.”
CC: “...You must have had one interesting childhood.”
**Williams smirks and takes a pull of his beer.**
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Post by mooseheadjack on Jan 22, 2009 13:55:04 GMT -5
[Johnny Adrenaline is seen in a suit and tie and heavy coat outside a building in the snow. A gentleman pulls up in a BMW and greets him.] BMW Guy: Mr. Adrenaline? JA: Yes sir. BMW Guy: What can I do for you? JA: I need to see what kind of variations you have on display here. BMW Guy: Well, I'm sorry, we're closed today. JA: I understand, but this is really important. I have a presentation in two days and I need the finest quality stuff out there. BMW Guy: Well, I can show you a couple things. Follow me... [The guy that drove the BMW and Johnny walk into the building as we see the following image as we fade out.]
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