|
|
Post by mooseheadjack on May 31, 2008 9:55:52 GMT -5
Live! from Plain City, Utah!
Revolution XX & Chris Alt vs. Niles Anderson, Morte & Endo
UnderDawg vs. Beast
3Piece Set vs. Outback Jack & GatorBait - OOWF World Tat Title Match
Hellion & Corax vs. FF Capslock & Stank
Dragons vs. Brad Smoley & Smark
Johnny Adrenaline vs. Mark Vander - OOWF Intercontinental Title Match
LD Williams vs. Concrete TG
Moosehead Jack vs. Thim Reynolds
Microplay vs. Attitude Adjuster
Tommy O'Neil vs. Semaj B.
GimmickMan vs. Canadian Dragon
JW Westgaard vs. Blade w/Ayaka
Donovan Viper vs. Hardbody Harris
If you want stips added to your match, let me know by Friday, card isstill subject to change
|
|
|
|
Post by mooseheadjack on May 31, 2008 9:56:19 GMT -5
*Chris Alt is backstage signing autographs.*
Alt - there you go kid. Welcome to prime time. Oh, hello there pretty lady. Of course I'll sign there. Welcome to primeti...
*Niles charges in headlong and spears Alt into a bunch of boxes that had no apparent reason for being directly behind Alt. Niles starts wailing on Alt with a flurry of furious fists.*
Niles - WELCOME TO PRIMETIME, BITCH! WELECOME TO PRIMETIME!!!
*Alt's fans are standing around screaming. One female pipes up.*
Random Female - (practically crying) STOP IT! YOU'RE HURTING HIM!!!
*Niles stops beating on Alt for a second and stands up with an apologetic look on his face.*
Niles - (sympathetically) Oh, sorry. I don't know what came over me. I guess I'm taking out my insecurities on someone else and that's just not fair to Chris Alt.
*Chris Alt is a bit dazed and bleeding. Niles helps him up and gives him a pat on the back.*
Niles - I mean, it all makes sense now. I have a big case of little man syndrom and I need help for it. All this talk of being the perfect physical specimen and being 100% Pure Man (tm) was just my inner child crying out for help because I don't actually feel that way.
*Niles goes up to the crying female and shakes her hand.*
Niles - thank you for showing me the error of my ways. I'll no longer refer to myself as "The Specimen" Niles Anderson. I am from this point on "The Philanthropist" Niles Anderson. 100PH. 100% Pure Humility.
*The crowd cheers as Niles is apparently reborn before the world. He continues to shake the females hand as he raises the other to wave to the crowd. Chris Alt is amazed by this act of good will by Niles.*
Niles - (as he continues to shake the females hand) And to you Chris Alt, I have this message...
*Niles stiffens the arm he uses to shake the females hand and pulls her in to perform a... OH MY GOD!!! A STEED-D-T! OH THE HUMANITY!!! Niles quickly jumps up and gives Chris Alt a kick to the midsection. The crowd is in shock. Niles gives Chris Alt a Steed-D-T as well. He gets up quickly and raises his arms in triumph.*
Niles - and that just goes to show you that bitches don't know. You just don't step this way.
*Niles crouches down to the now completely dazed Chris Alt. He lifts Alt's head up so as to face him.*
Niles - I accept your challenge. See you in an ambulance at the next PPV.
*Niles then slams Alt's head back into the floor as he walks through the shocked crowd. Fade to black.*
|
|
|
|
Post by mooseheadjack on May 31, 2008 9:56:48 GMT -5
(CTG is back at his condo, hanging up a new decoration in his living room - a bent to hell six iron) This is a reminder..... to LD Williams, to Johnny A, to Moose... to the establishment. Williams, I have claimed this trophy as proof positive of the Mick Foley rule of foreign objects, tho that may not always hold sway here. Johnny, you did something that I have been professing for some time would never, EVER happen. For a moment, ever so brief a moment..... This Concrete cracked. (rubs shoulder) and for that brief a moment, my only thought was beating you to a bloody pulp. For that thought, Johnny, I apologize. You were the better man in the end, but your buddies really shouldn't have gotten involved. I doubt you'll apologize for that. Williams - you're the one who wanted to put me out with that golf club. This isn't leaving the condo, so I guess you'll have to buy Johnny a new one so you two can dress up like pimps and walk after a ball several sizes larger than the withered grapes you were born with. But what you do in your spare time, I could care less. Just so you know, I'm not looking past you. Moose..... ah, Moose, I know what you saw was something that grayed your black heart a bit - thinking I could be violent, that I could be murderous, that I could be you if I really really tried. Perhaps, locked away under this multicolored vest or the neon T-shirt (on sale now at OOWF PurchaseZone) there could be that twinge of darkness, that pinch of evil that all men have. Do you want to see that again, Moose? REALLY see it? Up close and personal? Well, then, I have something right up your alley......... I want a cage match, Moose.... and not just ANY cage match. I want you to take some of the money you've saved, steal it from the new GM, rob a bank, I don't care - go buy a couple hundred yards of barbed wire and thread the cage with it. Then hook that muthaf<bleep>er to something electrical. Then leave me about 10 feet of it so I can wrap it around a baseball bat. Bring something just as sharp and pointy if your antlers fall off in the meantime. Because this time, Moose, I'm gonna SHOW you what I'm made of...... cause when the dust settles, Moose, the Red River Valley will be flowing out of that ring, dripping off the wire and cage mesh, soaking the ref's shirt, and splattered all over the fans in the first three rows! There won't BE anything left of whoever loses that match! One of us will be beyond recognition when it's over, and people will be fleeing their seats to puke in someone else's popcorn at hte sight of raw flesh, bloodied faces, tatters of tights and shirts, a room filled with nothing but red, slashed and lacerated souls. That's what you want, isn't it? ISN'T IT?  (leans in REAL close to the camera) I KNOW YOU CAN HEAR ME, MOOSE! Because if you accept my challenge and I survive, I'm gonna go looking for Viper. Cause you're gonna be too DEAD to stop me. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU STEP ON A CRACK IN THE CONCRETE, MOOSE. (a wild-eyed Concrete backs away from the camera, holding a very large sledgehammer) Remember my words (Smashes the camera til static remains) |
|
|
|
Post by mooseheadjack on May 31, 2008 9:57:11 GMT -5
*OBJ, GB, and Steve are watching the announcement of next week's lineup*
GB: It's about time we got a title shot. Not that I'm telling anybody anything they didn't already know.
OBJ: Right, Gator. But with what's been going on in our matches lately, we need an insurance policy against outside interference.
Steve ("tailing" a venomous snake): Crikey, mates! I've got an idea!
*camera spins and fades as snake spits venom at camera*
|
|
|
|
Post by mooseheadjack on May 31, 2008 9:57:37 GMT -5
(Moose is in a darkened room, it looks like a basement, dark and damp, the room is lit with only a single hanging lightbulb)
That's good Concrete, that's what I want to see, don't fight it. You hate me, you hate me more than you've ever hated anyone in your life, why? Because you and I are a lot alike. See Concrete, you repress your rage, you keep the anger in you in check. Other than your little outburst against Johnny, you havea squeaky clean reputation. But underneath that, beyond the fans cheers, beyond the time you take signing autographs, and letting those imbicile fans take your picture, I know the truth, and so do you.
You hate it all.
See Concrete you hate me because I am all the things you try not to be. I don't give a damn about the fans or titles or fame, I just want to hurt people. You do to, don't you? Think about it, right now, you want to get at me so bad you can't stand it. Right now, you want to take Attitude Adjuster and the rest of those morons in the AYUFF and beat them into submission. Tell me you haven't thought of the feeling that slamming a chair across AA's head would bring you. Seeing him crumple helplessly to the floor, blood pooling around his head, while you stand over him, dominant, with cold steel in your hands.
Concrete at Madness, you want a barbed wire cage weapons match? I'm all for it. But one thing, you can't beat me. As long as you are Mr. Goody goody with the fans and your idiot followers, you can...not...beat...me. Why? Because to beat me, you are going to have to free yourself, you are going to have to allow that part of you that you try so hard to keep hidden away to come out and take control.
And, Concrete, are you willing to go that far? There is no turning back, to beat me you will have to become.....me. You think about that Concrete, you think about going over the edge with me, you get good and angry, you make damn sure you are ready for this, because if not, if not, I will end your career. I put you in the hospital once Concrete, I will do worse this time
Trust me
|
|
|
|
Post by mooseheadjack on May 31, 2008 9:59:16 GMT -5
TO (talking to himself):Semaj B. huh, from what i've seen, that boy is about as useful as tits on a bull. Well if he wants to have a bloody go of it, that brilliant. And bring that boyo Thim with ya, i'm not worried about 'im...he's nothing a, bigger bollux has never put his arm through a coat...
Cut to commercial
|
|
|
|
Post by mooseheadjack on May 31, 2008 9:59:44 GMT -5
Sexy Female Journalist #18 and Underdawg are in the back.
SFJ18: Underdawg, it looks like you have a match against the Beast this week. He's been close to beating your cohort, Donovan Viper for the championship on two occasions now. What do you think your chances are?
UD: My chances are very good. Beast may be one of the biggest, and most intimidating superstars on the OOWF roster, but he hasn't faced someone that's as big as him before. His brute strength shall not...
just then the wall behind them breaks down, as the Beast walks through.
Beast and Underdawg stand eye to eye (Wow! They're both so tall!) and staring at each other with intense intensity!
Beast: I hate your boy Viper. And I don't like you too much, neither.
UD: You still have my powersaw that Viper lent you.
B: Hmm. That I do. It's a lovely powersaw, by the way. Craftsman. Did you buy it at Sears?
UD: Yes, I did.
B: I take it that you want it back?
UD: You're damn right I do.
B: Could you get Viper to challenge me again? I'd love that belt of his. If you can do that, I'll give you your saw back.
UD: No. That's up to him.
B: Hmm.. Well, I'm a fair Beast, and it's not right that Viper took your saw to give to me. That's quite scandalous, really.
UD: I agree. It wasn't kosher.
B: No. It wasn't. So as I said, I'm a fair and generous Beast, so I'll offer you this. Our match this week at Midweek Mayhem, will be for the saw.
UD: A match for the powersaw? That's too easy, Beast. You know I'll destroy you.
B: Tough talk, Big Dawg. But I'm not talking about just any old one-on-one match. I'm talking about a POWERSAW ON A POLE match.
Underdawg grins: POWERSAW ON A POLE, you say? I like your style, Beast.
B: Well, I did have Eddie Bauer custom make these furry tights himself, you know. And these matching furry boots are also from Mr. Bauer. Your style isn't too bad either. The all-black ensemble really brings out your fur and your eyes. Who designed your coat?
UD: Donna Karan did, actually.. uh, er... I'm not talking about clothes, you damned fool!
B: Oh. But you said style... OOOH you mean the style of my sick, violent, and brutal mind?.
UD: Yes. That style.
B: Okay
*awkward silence*
B: POWERSAW ON A POLE match!
UD: I can't wait.
SFJ18: There you have it folks! POWERSAW ON A POLE match, this week at Midweek Mayhem! Go to Ticketbastard right now to catch this event LIVE!
They go nose to nose, smiling at each other as the camera fades out.
|
|
|
|
Post by mooseheadjack on May 31, 2008 10:00:07 GMT -5
Scene opens in a gentlemen's club. 3 Piece Set is sitting at a round table while 2 girls dance on a pole in front of them. Both are stylish tonight with the Tag Belts over their shoulders. Each one has a bandage around their heads though.
Ax: This is sure making my headache go away. Damn, there is nothing like being on top.
CC: Next week we have Gator & Outback Jack,
Ax: Give me a break. Those jerk offs didn't even win their own match last week. And that Steve guy that they hang out with is kind of fruity, don't you think?
CC: Definately, I hope they recovered from their match in time to watch what we did to Hellion & Corax. (Reached into his jacket and pulls out a set of hand cuffs and throws them on the table). Nothing like bashing that chair into Corax's helpless skull.
Ax: Dude, that was sick last week. loved it. (speaking to dancer #1) Did you watch the match last week.
D1: Yes I did honey.
Ax: What did you think?
D1: I like a man that can take care of business.
Ax: (turns to Cole) I'm borrowing these. (picks up cuffs and then picks up dancer one) Time to party. (Ax walks off screen, but you can hear him hooting and hollering about what a wild party they are about to have)
CC: Freaky bastard! (Cole takes the tag title off his shoulder and admires it. He even takes out a hankerchief and shines the plate.) Damn, I love being the champ. Barkeep, keep em coming.
End Scene.
|
|
|
|
Post by mooseheadjack on May 31, 2008 10:00:32 GMT -5
Plain City, Utah.
The camera slowly zooms in on the garage of The Plain City Autobody Repair Shop. Inside the garage is a VW Microbus with holes through each end. F.F. Capslock steps up into the bus through one of the holes in the side.
FFC- "Let me give you a little history lesson, Hellion and Corax.
March 2nd, Midweek Mayhem, Forks of Salmon, California- I spear the side of my own van in an attempt to destroy J.W. Westgaard. In missing him I go through one side and out the other.
February 27th, Home Sweet Hell, Dead Horse, Alaska- Hellion and Corax lose the only thing that makes them a valuable commodity in the OOWF, the OOWF World Tag Team Titles to Chris Cole and Ax-Man of all people!
And now we look ahead to March 9th, right here in Plain City, Utah. Hellion and Corax, the miserable failures that they are, have been slated to face the force that tore through the side of that van, F.F. Capslock with the unholy, unshowered force of inhumanity, Stank. I'm not looking forword to this match, because now that you don't have the titles, you are nothing. You are mearly a stepping stone on our way to total domination of the OOWF. On our way to the current Champions, we have to beat the former Champions. Well, so be it.
So Corax, Hellion, you better bring your A-Game, you better be prepared to break a bone or two, and most imporantly...YOU BETTER WATCH YOUR ASS, BUDDY!"
|
|
|
|
Post by mooseheadjack on May 31, 2008 10:41:18 GMT -5
[Cameras cut back to the locker room of Revolution XX where Eric O'Mac and Carl Coolname are watching the monitor when it shows Niles attacking Alt. Carl sprints for the door but O'Mac grabs his arm.]
Coolname: "Hey what are you doing! Chris is getting attacked i've got to help him."
O'Mac: "Don't do it Carl, you just know the others Morte and Endo are waiting."
Coolname: "I don't care, Chris is in trouble!"
[Eric gets stern in his talking.]
O'Mac: "Carl, I have something more important to talk to you about and you can not leave now. Chris will be fine, don't worry about it."
[The monitor now shows OOWF Officials and Security running in to check on Alt and Carl settles down.]
Coolname: "Ok man what did you want to talk to me about?"
O'Mac: "It's about Alt....."
[Eric shoves the cameraman out the door and shuts it.]
|
|
|
|
Post by mooseheadjack on May 31, 2008 10:48:07 GMT -5
Camera opens on Semaj leaning against the bar at a country club.
To bartender SB:...irred not shaken.
Semaj turns to the camera.
SB: So li'l Tommy O'Neal thinks that 'e's ready to step out of the ring into the squared circle eh. Mate you don't know whot you're doing, I certainly 'ope that you aren't expecting me to go easy on you because you're new 'ere. You're daft if you think that a match against me is anything but a cock up. Cheers!
|
|
|
|
Post by mooseheadjack on May 31, 2008 10:48:51 GMT -5
Backstage a man is walking. He is 6'6" 265 wearing brown and green long tights with a sleevless black t-shirt that says The Druids European Tour 2002 on it. He passes SFJ#4 who decides to walk with him.
SFJ4: Sir, you aren't supossed to me backstage, this is for OOWF superstars only.
Harper: You didn't get the memo sweetie? I'm the new OOWF superstar Harper Camby. You know the bassist for The Druids, the greatest rock band from 1997-2003.
SFJ: The Druids??? Never heard of them.
HC: Where have you been living lady? Anyway, my bvand decided to go seperate ways and I took up wrestling full time. I'm here to see head honcho. Word on the street its some guy named Mousey John or something.
SFJ: You mean Moosehead Jack?
HC: That's what I said, you deaf also?
SFJ: Well Moosehead isn't the GM, Ecosystem was and he has left and while many think Moosehead is running things he isn't technically the GM.
HC: Like I said, the word on the street is that he is the big cheese. Heh, Mouseface is the big cheese, that is pretty funny. You know, mice eat cheese.
SFJ: RRRRiiiiggggghhhhtttt. So you have come to compete here in the OOWF.
HC: If you want to call it a competition. I look at it more like a workout. You see when you look like a God like I do it is hard to find quality competition. I'm just looking to keep in shape for my next world tour. I figure a good 5-10 minute workout in the ring.....i my opponents can last that long with me. Most of the time they end up pissing me off early and I end up hurting them prematurlely. Let's hope that won't be a problem. Like, I said I need to go talk to Mouseketeer Jim right now so I'll see you around Sweet tits.
|
|
|
|
Post by mooseheadjack on May 31, 2008 10:49:17 GMT -5
An SFMJ catches up with L.D. Williams in the hallway:
SFMJ: “L.D., do you have any response to Concrete TG’s comments?”
LD: “Well, well, Concrete does seem to have a temper, doesn’t he? I could explain that Concrete is indeed overlooking me, and that focusing on Moose is a huge mistake. I could also go on about how Moose’s plan is inevitable. Now that Concrete has cracked once, it’s only a matter of time. But, to tell you the truth, I really don’t care.
Don’t make the mistake of thinking I’m out to get you, Concrete. I’m not Johnny or Moose. I’ve never had any thing against you Concrete. You had Johnny’s title, and I said I’d help him get it back. It wasn’t personal when I made you tap, it wasn’t personal when I pinned you, and it wasn’t personal when I came to the ring with the six iron. MidWeek Mayhem will be just another match for us, Concrete, and it won’t be personal when I beat you."
SFMJ: “Is there any truth to the rumors that Moosehead Jack is using you to wear Concrete down before their cage match?”
LD: “Have you met Concrete? He doesn’t now how to be worn down. If I beat the tar out of him, and I will, he’ll still be good to go next week. If he’s dumb enough to get in a barb-wire cage with Moose, well, it was nice knowing him. I’ve already reserved my front row seat."
SFMJ: “You and Johnny Adrenaline seem to have joined forces with Eric O Mac. Are you forming a faction?”
LD: “What Johnny and I are up to is nobody’s business but ours. But we are definitely not forming a faction. Factions are overrated. The Establishment is always arguing about authority,, The Ministry, don’t trust each other, and half the AYUFF can’t stand the other half. These guys join factions and think their backs will always be covered. When they half to fight theit own battles, they end up each other’s throats.”
SFMJ: “How is that different from you and Johnny?”
LD: “Have you ever seen Johnny and I argue over who was watching who’s back?”
SFMJ: “Well, no…”
LD: “Exactly. Johnny and I and… anyone else are allies of convenience. He has his goals and I have mine. I only expect Johnny to have my back when he says he will. I don’t expect him to come running every time I’m in trouble. We’re not afraid to fight our own battles.”
Williams’ cell phone rings
LD: “Hello….Good Timing, it’s all in pl…”
Williams turns and glares at the camera until it fades to black.
|
|
|
|
Post by mooseheadjack on May 31, 2008 10:49:44 GMT -5
[We get back from commercial and see L.D. hanging up on his cell phone call. Johnny Adrenaline walks out of his locker room and stops to chit-chat.]
JA: Who was that?
LDW: You know...
JA: Gotcha. Before I let you go, cause I know you got some things to tend to, did you hear the rumor about who the real General Manager is?
LDW: What rumor?
JA: I was surfing the internet Thursday night and on some site called OnlineOnslaught.com, there was a guy running his mouth saying that, well....
LDW: Who?
JA: [whispers a name to LDW]
LDW: No [BEEP] way!!
JA: Yeah.
LDW: I don't know if that's a good thing or a bad thing. I wish they'd tell us something.
JA: Where's that mic stand you were with?
LDW: Oh, she left with Hardbody Harris.
JA: Figures...hey cameraman, be sure you get this....Mark Vander. You get a shot at my Intercontinental Title this Wednesday night. And I'm looking forward to kicking the crap out of your little ass. You can be Ridge Runner Champion. Desert Sun Champion. IWC Light Heavyweight Champion. WWE Champion. But one thing you will NEVER be is OOWF Intercontinental Champion!! You can bet your little ass on that one. So after I mop the floor with you this Wednesday, do me a favor: give Missy my number for me. I can use a pretty little caddy next weekend out on the course.
LDW: Hey Johnny...
JA: Yeah?
LDW: I'll be back.
[L.D. leaves and Johnny goes back into the locker room.]
|
|
|
|
Post by mooseheadjack on May 31, 2008 10:50:41 GMT -5
OBJ: I guess 3 Inch Set is feeling confident. I'd say they got lucky. They were damn lucky to escape getting destroyed by Hellion and Corax, because those bastards can go. But no worries, mates. We can smack these bastards down.
GB: Not that we're telling them anything they don't already know.
|
|
|
|
Post by mooseheadjack on May 31, 2008 10:51:06 GMT -5
And so the gaze of Mooseheadjack finally turns to Thim Reynolds . . . and then blinks and turns away I guess. So Moosezilla goes and makes a match with me for this week and then goes and looks straight through me and on towards Concrete and the next PPV.
Well that's a big mistake Moosecrapjack . . . you should pay more attention to what I've been doing to that bunch of layabouts called the Establishment, including your 'Boy' Niles. Hell, what's he call himself . . . 'The Specimen' . . . sounds like a streak of piss and fights like one too.
So how are we going to play this one then Pinheadjack? How's it going to go down this week. Let me think . . . ring the bell, go off on one another for a few minutes until I surprise you and start to suplex the s**t out of you when surprise surprise the reff takes an accidental elbow off Moosezilla and goes down. Here comes the rest of the Establishment who take me down with the numbers game culminating in a Heart Punch from your good self just before the ref comes to and you get the pin. That's fine with me. Like I've said before as long as me and everyone else knows who's the best it doesn't really matter who actually gets the 'Official' win.
Does that sound like what you had planned Moosemiester? I mean it's just the Establishment plan A that they pull out of the box each and every week so why should it go down any different this week . . . unless of course you decide that you CAN actually do this by yourself . . . It's just like Niles all over again isn't. You've all got this gang mentality, a complete inability to stand on your own two feet and prove that you're better than the next guy . . .
MooseheadJACK, why don't YOU take a stand. Show me what YOU'VE got. Make the others stay in the back and prove to me and more importantly prove to yourself that you can do this ON YOUR OWN . . . just once, show me what you've got . . . show me that Mooseheadjack and actually WRESTLE . . .
|
|
|
|
Post by mooseheadjack on May 31, 2008 10:51:26 GMT -5
(in a dark room, MHJ sits in the corner)
Thim Reynolds. For a man who seems to have a pretty good grasp on things, you certainly do not understand the way I work. You see, I know you are a tough individual, you are scrappy and all that crap, I got all the details from Endo and Morte. I know full well what to expect from you, but you, you don't seem to understand me.
See THim, I don't really care about wins, or losses, or titles or any of that. All I want to do is hurt people, get in their minds and mess with them. Ask Concrete how that feels. So, Thim, I could beat you one on one, or you might beat me, it all really doesn't matter as long as I hurt you, and I WILL hurt you. Whether it is on my own, or with a chair, or with the entire Establishment behind me. All that matters is that after the match, you will be bloody, battered and bruised, and you will fear Moosehead Jack.
Trust me
|
|
|
|
Post by mooseheadjack on May 31, 2008 10:51:49 GMT -5
Semaj is TALKING! on his cellphone in front of a conveniently placed stack of boxes.
SB: It certainly appears that Moose'ead thinks you're afraid mate, it's too bad 'e doesn't realize that getting in the ring with you means 'e's going to get a beating of 'is ow...
From off camera Tommy O’Neal charges in, his left hand leading. Semaj steps to Tommy's right and knees him in the gut. He slides his right arm around Tommy's neck and is about to drop him with a DDT, but Tommy counters with a double leg take down. Tommy is the first to his feet and tags Semaj with a couple of right jabs, on his third attempt, Semaj counters by grabbing the wrist, twisting, and then falling back into a flying armbar. Semaj is up and drops an elbow to O’Neal’s neck and follows it up a legdrop to the neck as well. He drags Tommy to a stand before kicking him in the stomach. Semaj goes to the head scissors and double chickenwing and elevates Tommy onto his shoulder, but before he can finish the Live and Let Die, Tommy wiggles free of the hold. O’Neal spins Semaj around and connects with a knockout left. Semaj crumples to floor, but Tommy isn’t done with him yet, he picks Semaj up and delivers a brutal Farooq-style spinebuster into the boxes!
TON: Thanks fer not goin easy on me.
|
|
|
|
Post by mooseheadjack on May 31, 2008 10:52:18 GMT -5
[Johnny Adrenaline is walking down the hallway, IC Title over one shoulder, carrying his golf bag with the other...]
JA: [singing] When I see you smile... I can face the world... Ohhhh ohh... You know I can do anything...
[Sexy Female Journalist #35 stops him before he walks into his dressing room.]
SFJ#35: Johnny, can I get a word with you?
JA: Honey, you can get anything you want from me.
SFJ#35: You have Mark Vander tonight with your coveted Intercontinental Title on the line. Any thoughts?
JA: I told Vander...give Missy my number for me, and I won't kick his ass too bad.
[Moosehead Jack opens the locker room door and steps out. For some reason the hallway goes dark and a single light bulb on a string falls from the ceiling.]
SFJ#35: Moosehead Jack, what brings you here?
MHJ: Adrenaline, the general manager has booked you a match for Madness: you versus Attitude Adjuster...
JA: Huh?
MHJ: ...and assuming you get past Vander tonight, your title will be on the line.
SFJ#35: Johnny, you've never defeated Alan Capps before.
JA: Moose, why the hell would you book me against...
MHJ: Damn it, Adrenaline, for the last damn time, I AM NOT the general manager. This is NOT my doing...
JA: Well, Mr. Know It All, Moosehead Jackass! Tell me who the general manager is then...
MHJ: Where's Williams?
JA: Answer me. I heard it was...
MHJ: Adrenaline.........you talk too much. Trust me.
[MHJ walks down the hallway, the lights come back on and the light bulb disappears. Johnny and SFJ#35 are left befuddled.]
|
|
|
|
Post by mooseheadjack on May 31, 2008 10:52:45 GMT -5
*Chris Alt is storming through the backstage area with a chair, looking angrier than we have ever seen him*
CA (screaming): ANDERSON! ANDERSON! COME OUT AND FACE ME YOU F**KING COWARD. WHERE ARE YOU, YOU GIGANTIC P**SY??
*CA spots a stagehand trying to dash out of his way and grabs him and pins him to the wall*
CA: I'm only gonna ask you this once: Where the f**k is Niles Anderson?
SH: I don't know, don't hit me, DON'T HIT ME!
*With a disgusted snarl, Alt throws the stagehand down the hallway and keeps going, eventually throwing open a side door, where he stands face to face with Moosehead Jack*
CA: Where the hell is that little p**sy?
MHJ: I think you ought to just calm down, Alt. I'd hate for something to happen and you get escorted out of the arena by security and miss your match tonight.
CA: ME? Are you kidding me, you asshole? I've just spent the last three days in the hospital with that poor girl that he attacked, begging her family not to sue this company. I saved your ass, Jack, whether you care to admit it or not. I'm not asking for a pat on the back, or a thank you. I just want to know where your little bitch boy Niles is. That doesn't seem like an unreasonable request to me. Especially since it doesn't seem like Anderson's going to get any kind of punishment for the incident.
MHJ: You just let me worry about what kind of repurcussions Niles will face. You'll get your hands on him later tonight, in your tag match. So I suggest you go cool it until then.
CA (throws down the chair): You want me to cool it? (long pause) Fine. I'll cool it. For now. But I'll tell you what, Jack. He touches another one of my fans... and you can change that ambulance match into a casket and hearse match. Because as God is my witness, that piece of s**t won't step out of the arena alive.
*CA turns to leave*
MHJ (smirking): Oh, and Chris?
CA (turning back toward MHJ): What?
MHJ: Good luck with your tag team match tonight. You and Revolution XX, huh? That'll be pretty interesting.
*CA just glares*
MHJ: I mean, Carl sure has been acting awfully out of character, lately. *shrugs* But I'm sure it's nothing. I'm sure you can... *chuckles* trust him.
*CA glares at MHJ with a calm intensity before turning around and walking off*
|
|
|
|
Post by mooseheadjack on May 31, 2008 10:53:11 GMT -5
## Mooseheadjack wanders slowly out of his office, smirking as he watches Chris Alt storm off down the corridor . . . Thim Reynolds ducks out from behind a drinks machine in the corridor and puts MHJ on the floor with a single leg takedown, spinning over into the Reflex-o-lock. As Thim begins to work the lock he concentrates his attentions on the shoulder centers - continuing the preasure until MHJ's arms go limp . . . MHJ: YOU'RE GOING TO PAY FOR THIS THIM - GET THE HELL OFF ME TR: there's none of you Establishment buddies around now is there Mooseyboy ## Thim releases the Reflex-o-lock and move into the Vulcan Massage of Doom MHJ: BRING IT TO THE RING YOU SAID THIM, ONE ON ONE YOU SAID THIM - WHAT THE HELL DO YOU CALL THIS SNEAK ATTACK? ? TR: Call is a lesson ya' big pointy headed freak!! ## As MHJ's head finally goes limp TR backs off down the corridor to gather a run up and then delivers a devastating Yakuza kick straight to the defenceless face of Mooseheadjack, knocking him out cold ## Thim bends down and grabs the MHJ by the neck TR: HOW'S THAT THEN JACK . . . HOW'S IT TASTE FIRST HAND?? Was it everything that Morte and Endo told you it would be? Can you see why your lackeys have failed now? Fear you? . . . FEAR YOU?? I don't fear you . . . I pity you. You've got no morals, no convictions, no friends and no idea what you're getting yourself into. Come Wednesday you're going to have a whole lot better idea of what I can do and of how much pain you can really take. ## MHJ groans as he starts to come round ## TR releases MHJ's neck and spits in his face TR: see you in the ring Boss . . . ## TR walks off leaving MHJ recovering on the corridor floor MHJ: fear me . . . trust me . . . |
|
|
|
Post by mooseheadjack on May 31, 2008 11:00:41 GMT -5
Finally, AA gets his due. I get the former OOWF champion, Microplay, in the ring this week at Midweek Mayhem. At the next Pay Per View, I get my shot at the Intercontinental championship against that two-bit loser Adrenaline. It’s good to see at least the new GM understands that AA Equals Ratings.
Microplay, you’re a FORMER OOWF champion. Past tense, has been, history. Yet your resume will serve my purpose this week. I defeat you, and it’s just another mark on my long list of victories in the OOWF. Williams. Endo. Even my good buddy, Beast. Oh, and Adrenaline...twice.
All fell to the superior talent of AA. So you see Microplay, don’t feel bad. When your shoulders lay on the mat for the three count, you’ll be in good company. Then I’ll move on to bigger things, like bringing the IC title back to the AYUFF. And once I have that title, it will bring the OOWF into the major leagues of professional wrestling and once again it will be seen that…
AA Equals Ratings.
|
|
|
|
Post by mooseheadjack on May 31, 2008 11:01:12 GMT -5
(Camera cuts to the OOWF Parking Garage where Thim Reynolds is seeing Semaj B to his car. We see them from behind a pile stack of pallets <as if someone is spying on them>
TR: so, now what's going on, why do you
have to leave in such a hurry?
SB: Somone from the OOWF Offices called me, they said there is some kind of problem with my contract, and they need to meet with me, to straighten it out.
TR: Something doesn't smell right about this.
SB: No worries mate, just hang here, I won't be gone long, just watch your back, after the whuppin you gave Moosehead he is going to be out for blood.
TR: Ha! Moosehead Jackass got what he deserved, let him come poking his nose around here, I'll kick it off his face again.
<behind the pallets we see the unknown figure wrapping a chain around his fist>
TR watches SB pull away and starts to wakl toward the building, as he is about to reach the door, Moosehead Jack jumps out from behind the pallets and nails Thim right in the face with his chain wrapped fist, Thim collapses in a heap, Jack mounts Thim and pounds away at his forehead, until Thim is a bloody, semi-conscious mess.
Moose gets real close to Thim's face, almost whispering
"you want my attention, you got my attention. You want to play the sneak attack game, that's fine with me. Where's your boy Semaj now? Nowhere to be found, that's right, he's off tending to some emergency, wonder who could have placed THAT call. No one jumps Moosehead Jack, Now it's time for you to pay. Trust me.
With that, Jack loops the chain around THim's neck and drags him off screen.
|
|
|
|
Post by mooseheadjack on May 31, 2008 11:01:42 GMT -5
The camera focuses on L.D. Williams in the locker room:
“A word of warning, Alan Capps; Be careful what you claim. You say that you have proven yourself in the OOWF. You say that you have beaten me. That’s two strikes. The third strike will be losing to Johnny Adrenaline, but if you keep running your mouth, you won’t even make it that far. I haven’t forgotten about you AA, just like I haven’t forgotten about Westgaard. My match may be with Concrete this week, but feel free to get involved. Just prepare yourself for the consequences. Sooner or later, you will learn the lesson…
Fear Me.”
|
|
|
|
Post by mooseheadjack on May 31, 2008 11:02:08 GMT -5
SFJ#12 is STANDING backstage when Stank walks up behind her. She slowly turns around and stifles a scream
Stank: [Snatching the mic from her hand] "Bounce woman!"
SFJ#12 scurries off. Stank turns toward the camera
Stank: Hellion and Corax. Former OOWF Tag Team champs.
It's too bad about that.
You guys had yourselves a nice little run.
Unfortunately for you two...
...the bad news just keeps coming.
Cause, you see, now you're facing your end. Now you're facing your demise. NOW YOU'RE FACING two men who are HUNGRY. And that hunger is big enough to swallow... the ENTIRE TAG DIVISION...whole.
We are the biggest, baddest men the OOWF has ever seen. The Pride of Fresno. The near 7 foot over 300 pounds of automobile destruction in the giant FFC and the Bad Mama Jama in ME!
Supremacy is a foregone conclusion.
Hellion and Corax you think you are a threat? You're merely an appetizer... Fried Calamari... Southwestern egg rolls... Buffalo wings.
The main course? ... The tag titles, of course.
Our attack on you was merely serving notice. Not just to you two chumps... but on every tag team in the OOWF!
Believe it! Our dominance is at hand!
Bottom line is this... I put ass. We whoop ass... and at last... you will know... our wrath.
[Camera slowly zooms in close to Stank's face]
Feel it...Fear it.
Smell it...
Run.
|
|
