|
Post by mooseheadjack on Aug 10, 2010 11:32:57 GMT -5
OOWF MidWeek Mayhem Live! From Berlin, North Dakota
OOWF World Heavyweight Title Match[/u] Poe vs. Seamus McNasty vs. Concrete TG vs. Outback Jack
OOWF Intercontinental Title 2/3 Falls Steel Cage Match[/u] Stank vs. Davin Moreland
OOWF World Tag Team Title Four Way Dance[/u] kz vs. Drink & Destroy vs. Team Fuel vs. Team Team
OOWF Onslaught Championship Match[/u] Matt Folz vs. Firewoman vs. Alexander Darling vs. Ravenna Blue
card subject to white out
|
|
|
Post by mooseheadjack on Aug 10, 2010 12:05:09 GMT -5
Matt Folz walking down the hallway following Mayhem, knocking on the main door to Chamber V. Moose a opening with a glare.
MHJ: Yes? Can we help you?
MF:Easy big man, I'm just here to talk to your sister, not interested in getting into another one on five fight right now. The rest of the 4 of you can watch our conversation if you want.
Moose sighing, knocking on Fire's door. Arguing briefly with her before they both come into the hallway. Moose leaning against the door watching intently.
FW (holding the Onslaught belt): What?
MF (Smiling, holding hands out): 3 pieces of business, first, if you don't mind..
FW (Smiles, hands Folz back the belt): Yeah, sorry, got a little carried away there.
MF: I'm sure. 2nd thing is I don't want you to think I had anything to do with that, despite my reputation outside of the ring, I don't need and I don't WANT anyone's help inside it. If it were up to me, next week you'd get a one on one shot for this, you deserve a clean rematch.
FW: I'm not sure I believe you, but thanks. The 3rd thing?
MF:Look, I'm not going to pretend we're even remotely close to being friends but we can agree on one thing.
FW: What's that?
MF: That we both hate a certain hobbling, loudmouthed asshole we're facing next week.
FW: What's your point?
MF: My point is, you and I can do some SERIOUS damage to his knee, completely take him out of this match. Increase our odds. I've got nothing against Ravenna, either you or her manage to win the belt I'll hand you the belt and shake your hand
FW: I'll keep it in mind, anything else?
MF: Nope
FW: Good, get the fuck away from our dressing rooms.
Moose and Fire walking back into Chamber V as Folz walks away smiling, Onslaught Belt slung over his shoulder
|
|
|
Post by mooseheadjack on Aug 10, 2010 12:05:37 GMT -5
Firewoman has returned to trashing her locker room, while Moose and LD listen outside in the lounge.
LDW: Every time she loses?
MHJ: Yep. When she was four she would rip the heads off her stuffed animals. Except for the stuffed moose.
LDW: Aw, isn't that--
MHJ: Not a word, LD, or I'll tell your mom Fire winked at you.
LDW: You are an evil, evil man.
There is silence from the locker room. Lucky waits, looks at his watch as if he's timing something, then gets up and goes in. A few minutes later, he reappears with Firewoman's bags, and Firewoman following, getting ready to light a cigarette.
FW: Later....
MHJ: Plane isn't ready to leave yet.
FW: Mine is. I'm meeting Jericho for the PPV.
LD and Moose look at each other and stand up quickly.
MHJ: We can't let you do that, Fire.
LDW: Yeah...we uh....we can't?
Moose pulls LD over to the side.
MHJ: If she goes to visit....him....
LDW: Fiance.
MHJ:...whatever. She'll be relaxed. Calm. NOT violent.
LDW: Oh yeah...right.
They return to where Firewoman and Lucky are standing
FW: Not that I need your permission but--
LDW: Moose is right. You can't leave. Rick said--
FW: First off, fuck Rick. Secondly, he already approved it.
MHJ: Look, don't you want to get even with Evans and Tytan and ... the whole rest of the list?
FW: Yes. And I will. When I'm ready.
MHJ: You're not ready now?
FW: No, Moose, I'm not. Such things need to be done carefully, or else....Look, I'm not talking to you about this. I'm going.
Moose and LD look at each other, silently telling each other to think of something.
LDW: But what about your community service? You'll have to head back to Montreal soon to take care of that, and that'll just be extra --
FW: Moose said we weren't doing it.
MHJ: That's right. *he glares at LD, and LD looks at him like "I needed something!" * I did say that. But I just meant that particular service.
FW: Is it really scheduled for this coming week?
LDW: Sure...why not.
FW: Fuck....Lucky will you call--
L: Already on it. *Lucky starts dialing*
LDW: Sorry Fire.
FW: Yeah whatever.
Fire sits on the sofa, looking dejected. She finishes lighting her cigarette. Moose and LD high five each other behind Fire's back, and then LD heads off screen. Moose sits down across from her.
MHJ: Sorry, sis.
FW: You hate him. No you're not.
MHJ: Okay.... I'm not.
FW: Jerk.
MHJ......
FW:...........
MHJ: ........
FW: So what's wrong with the community service we were assigned anyway. It's just an or--
MHJ: Look....let's get one thing straight. I know you've not be straight with me about many many things in your past. And I don't care. I don't ask.
FW: So?
MHJ: So this is none of your fucking business.
Moose gets up and storms off, leaving Fire looking now both dejected AND confused.
|
|
|
Post by mooseheadjack on Aug 10, 2010 12:06:01 GMT -5
*Scheme Gene is walking through the Destroyitarium when Wally B King cuts him off*
WBK: If you're looking for Jack, you'd better leave him alone. He's still Jack of the Hinterlands right now.
SG: Actually, Wally I was looking for you. Rumor has it you've been linked to the Tiger Woods situation.
WBK: It's just a coincidence that Greg Norman is a mutual friend.
SG: So the videos of you dropping women off at his mansion...
WBK: Obviously fake.
SG: And what about the rumors connecting you to the Orange Pride scandal?
WBK: The details of my consulting contract with the university are confidential.
|
|
|
Post by mooseheadjack on Aug 10, 2010 12:06:22 GMT -5
A ninja cam fades in to see Chris Evans walking into Team TEAM’s locker room.
Tytan: Heh, well if it ain’t the Carebear. What the hell do you want?
Evans: Cute Tytan, very cute. Look, we came here because...
Ecosystem: Wait, we? There’s nobody with you.
E: Yeah, Bryce is with me. He’s right...wait, where the hell is he?
*Evans looks out into the hallway and sees Bryce, yelling at his shadow to quit following him*
E: *shakes head* Wow...
Eco: You want to join our cause, correct?
E: You got it.
Tytan: And why the hell should we trust anything you say anyway?
E: I’m not asking you to trust me, that’s for you and Eco to decide. The fact is, I doubt we’ll ever be friends, but one thing we can one eye to eye with is that The Five is gonna destroy this fed if they’re not controlled.
Eco: While that may be true, those are some big words coming from a guy who just a few days ago was their ally and a mindless lackey.
E: If anyone knows anything about being a mindless slave around here, it’s your partner.
Tytan stares daggers at Evans and moves to attack.
T: The hell did you just call me?!
E: Okay okay, that came out wrong. What I mean is that, you’re no longer the puppet of Ultimo Inc. Thanks to Eco’s influence, you’re nothing like you used to be. You’re an independent mind, and that’s what I’m looking to become.
*Tytan relaxes but is still pissed off*
T: I’m still not buying it. You can’t possibly expect us to believe that you’re a changed man within a few days.
E: I never truly changed, I was just a fool blinded by false promises. I don’t blame you for not trusting me though, not in the slightest. If I was in your position, I’d feel the exact same way.
I just want you to consider my offer. You both know firsthand of mine and Bryce’s talent, and we both respect the both of you, no matter what you may think of us. I don’t ask you to make up your mind right now, just think about it for a while.
Eco: You earned an impressive victory over Davin Moreland last night, and showed that you are definitely not one to be trifled with. We’ll consider your offer, but we cannot guarantee anything just yet.
E: Thanks, I appreciate it.
*Evans leaves*
T: You don’t actually trust those two, do you?
Eco: I’m not sure. While they were just recently allied with the enemy, at this point we need all the help we can get. If they truly want to fight for our cause though, they could prove to be valuable assets.
*fade to black*
|
|
|
Post by mooseheadjack on Aug 10, 2010 12:06:43 GMT -5
(Tytan sits and looks at Eco after there meeting with Evans.)
Eco: Well what are you thinking?
Tytan: Trust is earned it's not given away. We made the mistake with Mattie and look what he did with it.
Eco: By the way I do like what you did to him.
(The two bump knuckles.)
Tytan: It's just kind of funny he approaches us and we have then in a four-way dance for the titles.
Eco: But to have three teams taking out kz?
Tytan: It's sounds to good to be true. Something smells rotten.
Eco: I understand what you are saying but isn't that the garbage that hasn't been taken out of the locker room.
Tytan: It was suppose to be Matt's day.
Eco: Maybe we should go dump it at his door.
Tytan: That would be cool.
Eco: Or maybe someone should just take it out.
(Tytan gives Eco a look and Eco gives in.)
Tytan: Besides I need to cut a promo.
Eco: Fine.
(He leaves.)
Tytan: You see Firewoman I didn't do anything wrong in your match. I called it down the middle and in the end. Evans helped you cheat and you lost the match. So, I think there is only one person you should truly be pissed at and that is yourself. You were the one that let this all happen anyway and you are the one that let it all get out of control. So, that means one title out of the hands of the Five.
Next comes kz, so boys are you ready for a little fun? All I know is come Mayhem I am going to do what I have to to make sure those titles don't leave around your two waists. But it will be even better if those titles leave with us.
See you at Mayhem boys and make sure those belts are shined up nice because that will be the last time you will be holding on to them. Oh and Ravenna I am still waiting for you. Anytime you want to talk I am ready to listen.
(FADE)
|
|
|
Post by mooseheadjack on Aug 10, 2010 12:07:06 GMT -5
<Firewoman is sitting alone at The Chamber bar. She is sipping an extra large coffee and smoking, so much for the no-smoking rules. Moose walks up to Fire and sits down, lights a cigar of his own and takes a long drink of his coffee. A long silence passes between the siblings before Moose finally breaks it>
MHJ: straight or Irish
FW: Straight
MHJ: I’m impressed
FW: Well…….certain habits may have to be changed given the upcoming…………..ceremony
<Fire looks at Moose expecting an explosion. Moose takes a long draw off of his cigar, then another deep drink of his coffee>
MHJ: About that
FW: Here we go
MHJ: I am going to do something that I rarely do……
FW: Let me guess, you are going to demand that I break it off with Jericho. You know, you may be my big brother but that doesn’t mean you can…….
MHJ: Just shut up and listen. I am going to do something that I rarely do…………I am going to apologize
FW: SEE! It’s just like when we were kids! You always tell me what to…………wait, what?
MHJ:<Turning to look at Fire> I am sorry for how I reacted. If Jericho is the one that makes you happy, then I should just be happy for you. No need to bring drama into the Chamber and The Five.
FW: Well……..I………..
MHJ: And, when the time comes, since you are the closest thing to family that I have, it would be my honor to give you away
FW:<almost tearing up, but choking it back> That is……very kind of you
MHJ: You’re family, family doesn’t stab one another in the back, if you need me, or want me, I am there
FW: I………uhhh……..I don’t know
MHJ: I know you are speechless. And when the time comes, I would like you to be a valuable part of finding your replacement in The Five
FW: My……..wait, my replacement?
MHJ: Well sure. Jericho doesn’t much seem like the long distance type for relationships. I am sure he will want to have his wife at his side.
FW: Wait……what?
MHJ: Jericho is on, what, Smackdown? You can hang with Nattie and Beth. I am sure Rick will put in a good word for you, and we already know Vince has a soft spot for you.
FW:<jumping off her stool> Now you wait a damn minute. NO ONE tells me where I HAVE to go, and NO ONE tells me what I HAVE to do, you got that? I am The Five, I am OOWF, and it will be a COLD DAY IN HELL before I become some vapid Barbie mic stand! YOU HEAR ME?
<Fire storms away and slams her door, Moose takes another drag off of his cigar and finishes his coffee and sits back and smirks>
|
|
|
Post by mooseheadjack on Aug 10, 2010 12:07:24 GMT -5
Lucky and Firewoman are in front of the OOWF Banner, with Selena Gomez.
SG: Thanks for letting me tag along, Lucky.
L: If you want to be in this business you have to get out of the locker rooms occasionally.
FW: And you're learning from the best manager/valet in the business.
L: Okay...ready? I'm here with OOWF's former Onslaught Champion Firewoman. Firewoman, you lost your match last week, but many would say that it was a bullshit call.
FW: Of course it was a bullshit call. Look, Tytan, you can claim that you followed the rules and called it right down the middle, and I could probably find a few places to quibble with you, but you know what? You're not worth it. Look at your history Tytan. First you're a guinea pig for Ultimo, Inc. and follow them blindly. Then Poe becomes your partner, but you don't want a partner, Tytan. You need someone to spoon feed you, to tell you what to do, what to think, how to live....Poe, for all his other very obvious faults, expected you to make your own decisions, pull your own weight. But you couldn't manage that, so you parted ways, and now you find yourself a disciple of the OOWF's very own savior. Because you need that Tytan. You need a leader. You need to hook yourself to someone who will make all those big decisions for you, so you don't have to think or take any responsibility. So, of course you called it down the middle. Because someone told you to. So I don't even care about you anymore.
L: What about Evans? Arguably he cost you the match.
FW: I'm proud of Evans, actually. FINALLY he is close to earning that nickname of his. Finally he grew a set. But then thing about those, Chris? They can be cut off.
SG: Ooooo.....Edgy...
FW: Yeah, well, I get all tense before big matches, and since I'm not allowed to go anywhere to work off that tension, that's what you get.
L: Anyway.....you get your rematch this week, but for some bizarre reason it's a four-way match, even though there's no really good reason for that.
FW: Yeah, I have no idea what the booking committee is thinking. Folz should enjoy that belt while he has it. Ravenna is a fucking rookie who has no business being in a championship match --
SG: Let me ask next!
L: Go ahead....
SG: And the boy!! Talk about the BOY! How many ways are you going to kill him!
FW: There's only one way to kill the boy, as you call him. And that is to not talk about him at all. His ego can't stand it.
SG: Ooooooh....yeah.......
L: Okay, that's it, we're done.
FW: Awesome. Good job, Selena.
SG: Thanks! Hey...that's a nice scarf you're wearing.
FW: Thank you.
SG: Didn't.....um....Didn't Douchebag Moreland's skanky wife have a scarf like that?
FW: Huh...I guess she did. At least, at one time.
Firewoman smiles, tosses the scarf around her neck, and walks off.
|
|
|
Post by mooseheadjack on Aug 10, 2010 12:07:46 GMT -5
Wow.
(SFJ catches up with Tytan who is once again without his partner Eco.)
SFJ: Tytan care to respond to Firewoman's comments?
Tytan: See it's simple, once again I am out taking care of business and dealing with the crap that Firewoman is still spewing out. You see Fire I am my own person. I did exactly what I wanted to do in the match I let you to beat the crap out of each other and then Evans gave me the perfect opportunity to take the title off of your waist. So, if I am not even worth your time why are you even speaking about me. I took a shot at you with out even having to break a sweat. It seems there are other people that hate you as much as I do. So toots, I am not going to waist my time anymore with you. My mission was a success with you and to top it off I got my shots in on Mattie so I think I accomplished my goals and guess what I answered to no one on that one.
Ravenna I am still looking for you, you asked me to talk and now I am waiting and you are no where to be found. Find me when you are ready to talk.
Now, it's time to move onto the other Quinn. Moose, you and your partner are going to get those titles taken away from you real soon. So, shine then up nice because come Mayhem you are not walking out with them.
(FADE)
|
|
|
Post by mooseheadjack on Aug 10, 2010 12:08:06 GMT -5
**SFJ#47 approaches L.D. Williams.**
SFJ#47: “L.D., this week at Mayhem, kz faces perhaps your greatest challenge in a four way match for the OOWF tag team championship. Your thoughts?”
LDW: “Our greatest challenge…every time kz faces our greatest challenge the same thing happens – we win, and everybody forgets Every match is going to be when the odds catch up to kz…except they never do. Look, The Midnight Sons are two of the toughest men ever to set foot in a wrestling ring, but they can’t match up to a motivated kz. Evans and Larson, whether we like to admit it or not, are the future of this business. They have the potential to take this company to another level, if they can get their heads out of their asses long enough to win a match. It’s time for them to learn that potential is meaningless – if they really want to be the best, they have to prove it. Ecosystem…well he’s the father of the feast as it were – every one of us owe our places here to him. That said, if he insists on being a martyr, we have no choice but to oblige him.
And that leaves Tytan. The self-styled leader of the resistance. Wow, you adjust fast. You've gone from steroid freak to silent monster to comic sidekick, and now veteran warrior in what, a year? A year-and-a-half? Little hint for you - changing your gimmick every other month and having one feud of note doesn’t make you a veteran. Granted, you’ve had more to say in eighteen months than I have in five years but, as in many things in life, when it comes to pointless rambling, less is more.
You think I haven't noticed big man? All those promos about your epic feud with Fire, your vendetta against Moose, your desire for revenge on Poe, the need to teach Stank a lesson...you just skip right over me, don't you? Yeah I know, I’m the quiet one - the so-called follower. I’ve also accomplished more in this company than you and all of your allies combined.
So I’ll tell you what, Tytan. If you want to prove yourself…If you want to show the world that you’re your own man –that you belong among the elite…Forget about the Five. Forget about Moose and Fire and Poe and Stank. If you really want to prove something…the greatest wrestler on the face of God's green earth is offering you the opportunity of a life time – come and get me.”
|
|
|
Post by mooseheadjack on Aug 10, 2010 12:08:25 GMT -5
*Stank is standing by with SFJ#7*
SFJ#7 - This week you will be facing your long time nemisis Davin Moreland.
Stank - That's Three time OOWF World Champion, Multiple Intercontinental, Onslaught, DDT Ironman Heavy Metal Ladder, Trios Champion, The Domesticated, Douchebag, Doughboy... Triple D Davin Moreland... or as I like to call him... my latest victim. You see Douchestain, I know you wanted this match. You've wanted me inside a cage for quite a while. Am I supposed to be scared? Am I supposed to cower in fear of the never great Davin Moreland. You think your incessant how's the knee or fatopottomus jokes mean anything to me?
One reign and I established how dominate a World Champion I was and now one reign has established my dominance as Intercontinental champion. What do any of your fat jokes, insults, and overall douchiness mean in the face of that? Your threats are hollow. They mean nothing.
So it is I who will now face the hollow man in a 2 out of 3 falls match in a steel cage for my OOWF Intercontinental Championship. We've fought for this title before. You failed then, and you will fail at Mayhem. Cage or not. Two things are guaranteed however.
You will bleed and your wife won't be there to witness it.
|
|
|
Post by mooseheadjack on Aug 10, 2010 12:08:47 GMT -5
<Moosehead Jack is sitting in the back of the arena, alone, on top of a stack of pallets, seemingly lost in thought. He must sense the Invisible Ninja Cameraman so he speaks>
.....you know, Tytan, for weeks now, you have been calling me out. You have compared me to my sister, you have questioned my toughness, you have called LD and I paper champions.
I find that funny coming from someone who has yet to find his identity. As my partner said, who are you? A genetic freak? A silent, brooding monster? A sidekick? A leader?
You see, Tytan, while you struggle to find your role here in the OOWF, I already know what I am. I am violence. I am bloodshed. I am mayhem. And the thing is, those are not things that I just decided to call myself. Those are not just boastful, hollow claims. I have earned my reputation. Tytan, at MidWeek Mayhem, you are going to learn that you can call people out all you want, the fact remains is that you have NOTHING to back up your claims.
Nothing.
As for the rest of you? Sons, we've done this dance before. I said it before and I will say it again, LD was right, he left because he knew you couldn't cut it. Nothing has changed.
Eco.......you may have started this, but I am not kissing your ass Machiavelli. You were once a leader of men, you are now a false prophet leading a war against the Five that you cannot win. Your Vietnam.
And finally, Team Fuel. The great betrayers. I will say this, you just prevented the inevitable. At some point The Five would have tired of you, you were never one of us, and you were never going to be. We kept you around because it was convenient. Now, you decided to step out on your own. Good for you. At Mayhem, you will learn, first hand, why kz is the greatest tag team in OOWF history.
Trust me
<With that Jack leans his head back and closes his eyes and gets lost in thought again>
|
|
|
Post by mooseheadjack on Aug 10, 2010 12:09:12 GMT -5
*At the Destroyatorium*
It looks like a Darling family meeting is occurring in one of the back booths as Alexander and Alexis are sitting on one side and Spencer and Ashley are sitting on the other. DH Magnusson is sitting at the end of the table as well.
Alexander: Where the fuck is he?
Alexis: He said he'd be here and he'll be here.
Spencer: And here he comes.
Alexander: Took you long enough.
Davin Moreland: Davin Moreland had better things to do. Davin Moreland is no longer at the beck and call of the Sisterfucker.
Alexander starts to stand up when Alexis grabs his hand and pulls him back down to his seat.
Alexis: Don't give him the satisfaction.
Davin: That's a good idea Brotherfucker.
Spencer: My god. Can you shut the fuck up and not be a colossal douchebag at the moment? Our sister is missing. Your wife. Sit the fuck down and help us figure it out.
Davin actually looks a little shocked since he has no issue with Spencer and pulls up a chair.
Ashley: I know I'm not family...
Alexis: You're close enough, what do you think?
Ashley: Well, isn't it obvious The Five have her?
Alexander: That's the most likely assumption, but we all know Sam has her quirks. She disappears.
Davin: That was the thought at first which was why I didn't think much after a few days. But three weeks later...she'd have gotten in touch with one of us.
Alexis: Then what's stopping us from going over there and finding out what they did to her.
DHM: Because lass, they don't have her with them and one thing we know bout 'em is they have lackeys all over the place. We make one wrong move and no idea what they can have done to her.
Alexander: And if Poe's involved, that means Ket probably has her.
Davin: So once again, this is all your fault.
Alexander: Seriously, go fuck yourself Davin. I'm tired of this.
Davin and Alex both start to stand up when there is a coughing from near the door.
Firewoman: We heard there was a family meeting and I am family. Aren't I Alex?
The Darling plus clan turn towards the door and see The Five standing there.
Moose: And if Fire is family, that means I'm family. And if I'm family, it means we're all family.
Stank: Because The Five are the only Five.
LD: And this is our world now.
Poe: And I'll always be your daddy Boy.
Alexander: Where the fuck is she Poe?
Poe: I have no idea where your precious Samantha is Boy. But maybe if Alexis will come bow before me for old-times sake my memory may be jogged.
Spencer: How fucking dare you?
Poe: Ahhh, you must be Spencer. I don't believe I've had the pleasure yet.
Ashley: And you never will.
Firewoman: Can someone tell the diva trash to kindly shut up?
Alexis: Fire...Lisa...Please don't do this. We just want Sam back.
Fire looks like she might care a tiny bit...
Firewoman: Wow, that was almost sincere Lexie. But we both know you always wanted Sam gone. Maybe you did this.
Alexis: How dare you...
Moose: She dares because she's Five. So why don't you go blow the other half of the locker room.
Alexander stands up...
Stank: Oh look, the gimp is going to attack.
From behind Stank...
Spin: No he isn't.
And the brawl is on as Spin spams a chair over the back of Stank's head while Outback Jack spins Poe around and starts trading blows with him. Davin charges at Moose and those two go crashing into the hallway and right into Ric Flair's Sandwich Shop. Alexander nods at Fire and just as they're about to charge at one another, LD Williams flies towards Alexander's knee and luckily Alexander is able to hop back to avoid it, but now they're going at it. Leaving Alexis and Firewoman staring at one another. Firewoman blows a kiss and that's finally enough to send Alexis into a rage and she charges Fire. Fire chuckles as she sidesteps Alexis. She looks down at Alexis, which is a huge mistake as she turns her back on Mags. And Mags sends her flying over the bar.
The brawl rages...
*To Be Continued*
(By anyone)
|
|
|
Post by mooseheadjack on Aug 10, 2010 12:09:30 GMT -5
(Tytan enters the ring and grabs a mic the crowd cheers as he begins to speak.)
Tytan: First off let's get something straight. I have never claimed to be the vet that kz has claimed me to be. Second, LD you are right, I haven't called you out. Maybe it's respect, or maybe it's just that I am not that insane to call out the both of you.
(He paces around and then thinks about it.)
Well, you know what maybe I am that insane. LD you want to dance you want me to call you out to the ring then guess what I will call you out too. So, you want some I am not hard to find. But here is the thing I do my fighting in the ring. So, you and Moose want to man up let's go and take it in the ring. Partner, or not I am ready and my mission is to destroy you and take those tag-titles away from you.
And if you don't like it you better get use to it because I am coming at you.
(FADE)
|
|
|
Post by mooseheadjack on Aug 10, 2010 12:09:49 GMT -5
Kitchen Brawl III
*Davin and Moose slug at each other through the rubble, but it's not long until they both realize where they are, and both get sick, sadistic smiles on their faces. Moose lunges at Davin, and Davin BACKDROPS Moose into a stand up drink refrigerator and Moose smashes through it, sending Orange Juice and Vitamin Water splashing everywhere. Davin moves in to attack, but Moose smashes him in the face with one of the grates.
Moose picks up a shard of glass and starts stabbing Davin with it. Davin grabs a metal spatula and smashes Moose in the face with it. Davin tries to Irish Whip him into the fry-o-lator, but Moose is able to reverse it, and DAVIN LANDS IN THE HOT OIL!
Moose steps back and starts laughing, but Moose ends up eating a couple of fry-o-lator baskets to his face, leaving the little square impressions burnt into his face. Of course, Davin looks like one giant blister. Davin uses this opportunity to RELEASE GERMAN SUPLEX Moose onto the STILL HOT GRILL!
The grill collapses, with all sorts of gas lines, electric lines and still-hot grill surrounding Moose, sparks and all. Davin goes to press his attack, and Moose grabs one of the electric lines and jabs Davin with it. Davin happens to be standing in some water, and falls down in what appears to be some sort of seizure. Looks like maybe he's electrocuted.
Moose is desperately trying to get up, but it looks like Davin's looking in his pocket for something. Still virtually unconscious, he heaves something over to the grill area. Was that a...ZIPPO???
The last thing the camera picks up is a blinding white flash followed by a hard cut to black*
|
|
|
Post by mooseheadjack on Aug 10, 2010 12:10:11 GMT -5
(Moosehead Jack and Davin Moreland are being stretchered off to the hospital following third-degree burns. They are swatting at each other as the EMTs hold them back.)
MHJ: Let me off, I'll kill him!
EMT #1: Number one, that's a terrible incentive for me to let you off. Number two, you will probably also kill yourself.
DM: Davin Moreland says just bring i--FUCK these burns hurt.
(They are tied down more securely onto their stretchers and loaded onto separate ambulances. The camera follows Moose on his.)
MHJ: Shut the camera off.
Ninja: I can't. We might want stock footage. Don't try this at home and all that.
MHJ: (sighing) How dumb are the fans if they need to be told not to blow up a grill at home?
(Silence. The ambulance rides along until it pulls over near an abandoned gas station.)
EMT #1: Driver?
Driver: Get out.
EMT #2: What's the problem?
Driver: Get out of the car right now.
(The two EMTs file out and walk around to the driver's side, but see he's already disappeared.)
EMT #1: Where did--
(Eco suddenly comes out of nowhere and SLAMS a chair across the back of the head of the EMT. The second one ducks, but receives a kick to the gut and an ENDGAME on the chair.)
Eco: Hope that wasn't excessive force. You shouldn't ask questions.
(Eco climbs in the back of the ambulance.)
MHJ: Really? You?
Eco: Yes. Really me.
(Jack struggles against his restrains, but grunts from the pain of his burns. Eco kicks the gurney to the ground.)
Eco: It's funny seeing you in this way, Jack. So vulnerable.
MHJ: Wounds heal, Juni.
Eco: Some do. It's a shame when they're reopened though.
(Eco takes a knife from the pile of instruments.)
MHJ: You wouldn't.
Eco: Of course I wouldn't. I leave such business to you. Well...rather, I prevent you from such business.
MHJ: Not well. Despite your self-righteousness, I bring such suffering as you could not--
(Eco kicks Jack HARD on his burned side. Jack grunts in pain.)
Eco: I'm sorry to resort to that, but I want you to listen to me...(bending down and putting the knife by Jack's face)...VERY closely. You see, the vulnerability I reference is not your current state. It is this Wednesday, when you and LD face not two, not four, but six men who hate your guts. Six men who would like nothing more than to see you fall. Six men who are very, very tired of your games and your reign of terror.
MHJ: I'm tired of your rhetoric, Eco. It's as I said before--this is your Vietnam. You think you hold all the cards, and yet you will still lose. You will still fail. Your troops are weak, and The Five is strong.
Eco: You know what? I don't actually want to hear you.
(Eco whips out some gauze and wraps it over Jack's mouth.)
MHJ: MMPH!
Eco: Tell LD...tell LD I have no intention of being a martyr. I intend to take your titles. You can call me the leader, you can call Tytan the leader, either works. But we'll have one title each, and we'll call each other comrades.
MHJ: mmph...
Eco: Let me tell you what I'm going to do. I'm going to leave the two EMTs outside, but I will call an ambulance for them too. In the meantime, I will drive you to the hospital and see to it that you get treatment.
MHJ: (laughing)
Eco: What's so funny?
MHJ: mpph...weak...mphh
Eco: Oh I'm weak? I'm weak because I would prefer to see you make it to the hospital? I'd be weak to see you have your burns taken care of? I'd be weak to ensure that you're in top shape for our competitive match?
MHJ: MPH.
Eco: You're right. That would be weak. Luckily...I'm not weak.
(Eco runs the knife along Jack's army, slicing off a hanging piece of burnt flesh. Jack screams through the gauze.)
Eco: I extract my pound....well, ounce of flesh now, Jack. Not in a sadistic pleasure of course. It hurts me as much as it hurts you.
MHJ: MPPPPHH!!!
Eco: Perhaps not. Perhaps it hurts me less. (Eco begins to chew on the charred piece of flesh, to Jack's disgust.) But you need to know I'm capable of this. You need to know that I am capable of hurting someone this badly. Ninja, point the camera at my face.
(The ninja cameraman obliges.)
Eco: An eye for an eye, and a tooth for a tooth. Hammurabi's Code may not be fully ethically sound, but it is one of our earliest approximations of justice. One of the laws we forget out of Hammurabi is such:
If a son slaps his father, his hand shall be cut off.
Young though I may be, as LD noted, this is my company. I am indeed the father of the feast. Five, you have done more than slap me. And indeed, more than your hand will be cut off...
(Eco bends down with the knife as Moose struggles against the restrains.)
Eco: ...but not now. Not when it's this easy. Not when further viciousness would serve to prove nothing. You understand what I am capable of now, Moose. Five, you understand what I am capable of. There's only one thing left to do...
(Eco throws a kick forward and the camera suddenly falls backwards. We see Eco standing over an unconscious ninja cameraman who he throws out the back.)
Eco: I just don't trust him when we drive up to the hospital, Moose. He might want to give all these...explanations.
(Eco closes the ambulance doors and calmly climbs into the front seat, starts up the ambulance again and drives off with Moose tied to a knocked-over gurney in the back, EMTs and ninja cameraman left in a pile by the side of the gas station.)
FADE
|
|
|
Post by mooseheadjack on Aug 10, 2010 12:10:33 GMT -5
Meanwhile....
Firewoman and Alexis are throwing whatever they can find at each other. Cafeteria trays, catering pans,various utensils are flying. Firewoman just barely dodges to duck a pizza pan that Alexis throws her way.
FW: Aw, does that mean you won't be my maid of honor?
LD: Where is my fucking sister?
FW: Wow....her too?
Lexis growls and runs across the cafeteria. Firewoman grabs her by the neck, and lifts her up, chokeslamming her on that little rail that you slide your trays along as you go through the cafeteria line. She starts to run her all.....the........way......down.........towards the end of the track, but the end of the track is a brick wall. As they get closer to the end, Firewoman picks up speed, but just as she gets to the end, she stops suddenly, before she can bash Alexis's skull against the brick. She leans down close to Alexis's ear and whispers loudly
FW: Maybe if your ungrateful brother asks me really nicely, I'll tell him what I know about your Stepford wife of a sister.
LD: Why should he?
FW: Oh.....Firewoman fumbles in her pocket to get something .... He probably shouldn't. But he will.
She lets go, and directs her attention to again searching for something in her biker jacket pockets, and doesn't see Alexis sizing her up. It's been a while (no, not for THAT), but clearly Alexis thinks she can do it. She spins Fire around, kicks her in the gut, and as she doubles over, she picks her up for the Bitch Killer. She looks for a table, and spying one, aims, but before she can land it, a shadow falls over her, and she looks up to see Poe standing there. He smiles at her, but she only glares, until he reaches out to choke her too. (Poor Lexie's neck!) She drops Firewoman awkwardly, but not nearly as badly as she could have. Poe moves her to the center of the room and then turns to Firewoman, who looks at Poe with rage.
Poe: Are you okay?
FW: Get your hands off--
Poe doesn't wait for Firewoman to finish, but lets go of Alexis, and then hits the Hieroglyph. Alexis sprawls onto the floor unconscious.
Poe turns to Firewoman and she looks like she wants to kill
Poe: It'll have to wait....
FW: It's waited long enough.
Poe: Your brother is going to the hospital, and it appears serious.
FW: Okay, so--
Poe: So...Mr. Ecosystem is driving the ambulance.
Poe's words register, and Firewoman takes off down the hallway.
*fade*
|
|
|
Post by mooseheadjack on Aug 10, 2010 12:10:55 GMT -5
But yet there is more....
(As Poe and Firewoman head for the double doors heading out they find a surprise.)
Poe: The doors....what is going on here.
Firewoman: (Throwing her shoulder into it.) They won't budge!
(They listen as the hear a motor running on the other side of the door.)
(The ninja cam happens to make it over to the other side and sees Tytan pulling a forklift in front of the doors. He then grabs a metal pole and wedges it between the door levers. Well you know Tytan has taken tons of "Meds" from his Ultimo Inc days.)
Tytan: There, (he then laughs.) that should hold them for awhile. Enough to give Eco some distance.
(He then runs off to find some more action.)
(FADE)
|
|
|
Post by mooseheadjack on Aug 10, 2010 12:11:20 GMT -5
<We cut to the Berlin Hospital where Moosehead Jack and Davin Moreland are inexplicably sharing a room (Berlin has a very small hospital). Both are heavily bandaged and sedated>
MHJ: Asshole.
DM: Davin Moreland does not <ouch> care what Jack Quinn thinks of him
MHJ: I think you are an <oww> asshole
DM: Davin Moreland has been <dammit> called worse. Davin Moreland thinks Davin Moreland will decide what Davin <oww> Moreland is and is not
MHJ: You’re an asshole <oww>
DM: Davin Moreland may be <ouch> many things, but it seems highly unlikely that anyone would believe that <ouch> Davin Moreland is an asshole
MHJ: No, you’re <grunt of pain> asshole
DM: <totally dropping the third person> GODDAMIT JACK! I am NOT an <ouch> asshole!
MHJ: Yes you are
DM: NO I AM NOT!
MHJ: YES YOU ARE!
<Just when it looks like the two are going to somehow get out of bed and come to blows, a rather large nurse comes in and yells at them both>
RLN: YOU ARE BOTH ASSHOLES! Do you see the shape you are both in? All for what? Some rasslin show? I have other patients that are not as stupid as you two, and they need their rest. If I so much as hear another peep from you two I am going to come in here and CRACK SKULLS!
<She leaves>
DM: <under his breath> Bitch
<The nurse pops her head back in the room and glares at Davin>
DM: ITCH! The burns itch. Yeah. Oww
<The RLN does the whole “I’ve got my eyes on you” thing then leave, a long silence passes between the two>
MHJ: You’re lucky the <oww> nurse saved your ass
DM: Screw you! Davin Moreland was just about to <whimper of pain> get up and whip some Quinn ass!
MHJ: Please. You couldn’t even kick your own ass right now <oww>
<for whatever reason, perhaps the sedatives, perhaps the copious amounts of pain medicine, this cracks both men up>
DM: <stifling laughter> Hey, hey, lemme ask you somethin’ <oww> Was that nurse LD’s Momma?
MHJ: <laughing and nearly passing out with pain> Naw. LD’s momma is better looking
<more laughter, the RLN sticks her head back into the room and glares at them, they both try to conceal their laughter like children>
MHJ: Seriously <oww> you’re an asshole, I have a match Wednesday
DM: So do I <ouch>
MHJ: Then why the FUCK <oww> did you blow us up?
DM: Davin Moreland does what Davin More…………..ummm, what was I <oww> saying?
MHJ: You were saying, you were an <ouch> asshole for blowing us up
DM: Oh yeah, that……….ummm, Mavin Doreland would never………wait
MHJ: HAHA <oww> you are wasted, you fucked up your own name. Juicehead Mack would never do that!.........wait
<Both stop talking and seem to be concentrating really hard on what they were talking about>
DM: So where the fuck is Sam <oww>
MHJ: Not telling you
DM: Why?
MHJ: Because go fuck yourself, that’s why <oww>
DM: Nicely done!
<Davin leans over and they try to high five, but in their stoned state, they both miss and hit the floor. The camera cuts to the door where a very pissed off Rather Large Nurse walks in. We fade as she approaches>
|
|
|
Post by mooseheadjack on Aug 10, 2010 12:11:43 GMT -5
*Meanwhile, back at the Destroyitarium, The Midnight Sons have Stank cornered. They approach Stank but are attacked from behind by Poe and Firewoman. Stank joins in and evenutually the numbers game wins out.*
Poe - Is there a back way out of this place?
Stank - What's wrong with the front door?
FW - Somebody barricaded it. We can't go out that way.
*LD Williams approaches from off camera holding a bloody baseball bat.*
LDW - Go out what way?
Stank - Someone blocked the front door.
LDW - I just came in from that way.
*Stank shrugs his shoulders*
Poe - What do you mean?
*Poe and the rest of The Five sans Moose walk back toward the front door to see it wide open and a fork lift pulled back from it.*
Stank - Seamus?
LDW - No.
(The Five walk out the door and look down the hallway where they see an unconscious Tytan lying on the floor, a pool of blood forming under his skull. Williams lifts and rests the bat he's been holding on his shoulder.)
Stank - Okay where's Moose? I thought I saw an explosion.
Poe - He and Moreland were taken to the hospital.
*Firewoman takes off running. Stank and LD watch her retreat.*
Stank - Wow she must really care about her brother.
Poe - Eco was driving the ambulance.
*Stank and LD Williams exchange a knowing glance then take off after Fire with Poe running close behind.*
<fade>
|
|
|
Post by mooseheadjack on Aug 10, 2010 12:12:04 GMT -5
*Fade in*
Fuel and The Heroes cut off Poe, Williams, and Stank from turning the corner after Firewoman.
Stank: What are you doing Gryfon?
CTG: Citizen Stank, I am telling you that your nefarious ways will come to an end.
Ravenna: Nefarious, really?
CTG: Yes, Citizen Blue. Evil and nefarious are synonyms and I like using larger words. Is there a problem?
Poe: Yes there is a problem. You four are standing in the way. And we have no problem walking over you to get where we need to go.
LD: Evans...you might want to check on your partner.
Evans: Don't try to distract me. I may have been stupid enough to fall under Firewoman's charms...but Larson and I are going to take those belts off you this week.
LD: The same Larson who just rammed his head into that table?
Evans turns around to see Larson fall to the ground with blood pouring out of his head right next to a shiny glass catering table. He shakes his head in disbelief, but that gives The Five the distraction they needed and another brawl breaks out in the hallway.
-----Fast forward a few minutes------
Poe finally breaks away and starts to try and catch up to Firewoman...but it doesn't take him long at all to find her as he turns the corner and sees Firewoman layed out at the end of the hall.
Alexander Darling is standing over her holding a steel chair.
Let's flashback to what happened here...
<<<<FLASHBACK>>>>>>
Firewoman turns the first corner as just as she's about to turn the first corner to get to the parking garage...
CRACK
A steel chair slams into Firewoman's skull. She falls like a ton of bricks and Alexander Darling walks into the screen. He stands over Firewoman and jams the chair into her throat.
Alexander: Well hello there Lisa.
Firewoman tries to respond, but Alex jams the chair a little harder into her throat.
You know what, I just don't care to hear what you have to say today. You know, in time I probably could have come to understand you turning your back on me. It's a business and if there's one thing I hope you learned from me it's that this business is all about power. You could have just made a mistake and assume The Five would keep the power and you wanted to be part of that. I'd have accepted that.
Firewoman tries to sweep Darling's leg, but he drops a knee into her midsection and ends that attempt to get away, but now he's even closer to her.
Always a fighter. Another of the things that brought us together Fire. But then you decided to toss that away for your brother. A brother who was never there for you. A brother in blood who is nothing more than that and yet you toss a brother in soul away. Maybe you were playing the game from the inside. We both know you're capable of that...but then I remembered what you truly are. A cold, sadistic bitch. So, here we are Fire. You want to turn your back on our history. That's fine. I could move on from that. You want to ally with my worst enemies. Not a problem. Just another disappointment in my life. But you want to take MY family. Hurt MY flesh and blood. That I have a huge problem with. I was willing to let things happen with you, see how they played out...but now....you've made it personal and if there's one thing I enjoy...it's the personal satisfaction of making people hurt.
Alexander looks up and sees Poe turning the corner.
I guess our time is down for now Fire. But remember, payback's a motherfucking bitch. And there's nothing you can do about because I am Alexander Darling, and well, you're just not. BOOYAH, sweetie!
|
|
|
Post by mooseheadjack on Aug 10, 2010 12:12:24 GMT -5
*Poe and Alexander Darling are glaring at each other, when Outback Jack steps up behind Poe and nails him with a boomerang (a real one, not his move). The first shot only drops Poe to his knees, but the second knocks him to the ground. OBJ glances at Darling, who is still holding Firewoman at bay, and locks in the Croc Hunter. As Poe struggles against the hold, OBJ laughs*
OBJ: I doubt I'll get to do this at mayhem. That's the problem with 4-way matches, you never get a chance to lock in a hold like this long enough to do any real damage. If this was a real match, Alex would have come over and broken the hold. Right, Alex?
*Darling shrugs, then drops another knee into Fire's gut as she tries to get up*
OBJ: Well, Poe, I guess he's busy right now. Care to tap?
*Poe continues to battle valiantly, so OBJ switches to a blatant choke hold until Poe loses consciousness. OBJ then retrieves his boomerang and gets up*
OBJ: Well, looks like you've got everything under control here.
*Alexander Darling, who has replaced the edge of the chair under Fire's throat, nods*
OBJ: Well, it's been nice talking to you.
|
|
|
Post by mooseheadjack on Aug 10, 2010 12:11:22 GMT -5
*OBJ turns around and is turned inside out by a devistating RUNNING CLOTHESLINE from Stank! LD Williams follows and chases off Alexander Darling. Stank lifts Outback Jack from the floor and plants him with a STANKBOMB! LD Williams returns to check on Poe. Stank helps Fire to her feet.*
Stank - Poe?
LDW - He's reviving.
Stank - We need to hurry. We got Evans pretty good but Crete and Ravenna won't stay down long.
FW - A... Alex.
LDW - He got away.
*Poe starts to stir and begins to speak.*
Poe - What... happened?
*Stank nods over toward where Outback Jack lays unconscious.*
Poe - Th.. The.. The Boy! He was just here!
Stank - Forget Alex we have to get out of here.
Poe - No. I will rend the flesh from The Boy's bones.
Stank - Poe that's not smart. You've already seen what happens when one of us is isolated. Fire is--
Poe - No NEED to elaborate, brother. I will yeild to your wisdom.
Fire - I'm alright let go of me.
*Stank releases Firewoman as she hold her throat and coughs.*
Stank - They will be on us soon let's get the fuck out of here.
*The Five head out the back door to the parking lot where The Midnight Sons and The Heroes await brandishing weapons.*
Stank - Oh for fuck's sake.
<Fade>
|
|
|
Post by mooseheadjack on Aug 10, 2010 12:13:09 GMT -5
<Back at the hospital Moose and Davin Moreland are watching OOWFtv (don’t ask how)>
MHJ: Ok, this is bullshit, weapons? Really?
DM: Like YOU are going to complain about weapons?
MHJ: Fuck this, I’m leaving
DM: I am going too
MHJ: No, you stay here asshole
DM: You are never going to get past Rather Large Nurse, by yourself, in your condition. I am going too
<Moose ponders this for a moment then snarls>
MHJ: FINE
<Davin hits the call button while Moose gets out of bed and waits next to the door. As the Rather Large Nurse walks into the room, Moose grabs her, spins her around and SLAMS her with a heart punch! The nurse staggers and Moose pops her with a headbut as well. She bounces off the wall but then goozles Moose on the rebound. Davin hops out of bed and KILLS her with a big boot to the side of the head! But she STILL doesn’t stay down! Moose and Davin both grab bedpans and beat her down until the Rather Large Nurse is finally out>
DM: Are you SURE that isn’t LD’s Momma?
MHJ: Not so much anymore, no
<Moose and Davin make their way through the halls, now somehow back in their burned and bloody wrestling gear, trying to look inconspicuous. They make it out the doors where an ambulance is sitting, still running. Moose and Davin both head for the driver’s door and reach for it at the same time>
DM: I’ll drive
MHJ: Like hell, find your own ride
DM: Maybe YOU should find your own ri…..OOF
<Moose whips the door open catching Moreland in the face, sending him staggering backward. Moose kicks him in the gut and DROPS him with a DDT on the parking lot! Moose winces in pain as he struggles to his feet. He hops in the ambulance and guns it, heading back to the Berlin Arena. Davin Moreland was back on his feet, barely, and just avoids Moose speeding by, barely. Davin staggers around the lot for a moment trying to clear his vision when he spots a pizza delivery guy on a scooter. Davin grabs the pizza guy and military presses him into he bushes, then hops on the scooter, guns it <as much as you can> an heads to the Berlin Arena after Moose>
|
|
|
Post by mooseheadjack on Aug 10, 2010 12:13:36 GMT -5
*Meanwhile GM TheRick does not watch OOWF TV. Instead he appears to be seated, waiting in an unknown, non-descript, office. To pass the time, he stares up at one of those small digital marquee signs mounted up high on the wall directly facing him. Red headlines scroll past in english every 20 seconds.*
German Defence Minister Karl-Theodor zu Guttenberg has ruled out resigning amidst accusations that he lied about what information was available to him following a controversial and deadly air strike in Afghanistan ..
..
The 2010 Berlinale film festival will premiere the latest film by director Roman Polanski, who is under house arrest in Switzerland awaiting deportation to the United States on unlawful sex charges.
..
..
Frigid weather that rolled into Germany over the weekend is here to stay for another week with snow likely on the way, German Weather Service (DWD) reported on Monday.
..
..
OOWF Wrestlers in out of control brawl at Berlin Arena. Fire officials quoted as saying HELFEN SIE UNS! SIE SIND TÖTUNG!
*At this last headline GM TheRick rubs his temples trying to massage out an impending migrane.*
GMtR - I can't leave the arena for ONE FUCKING hour before all hell breaks loose!
*TheRick looks up and sees another headline scroll by.*
..
..
Ambulances stolen from Berlin Hospital. Staff mourns loss of pizza.
GMtR - ... ... Yeah that fits. We're in North Dakota and I'm watching German News from a town called Berlin... where everyone speaks German... and my wrestlers can't behave and are running up my insurance rates.
*A beautiful woman opens a nearby door.*
BW - Fräulein Schneiderhan sieht Sie jetzt, Herr Scaia.
GMtR - Um... I got to go. Tell her I'll reschedule.
<fade>
|
|