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Post by BookerShark on Apr 30, 2011 9:10:39 GMT -5
Firewoman is SITTING in her shipboard office, trying hard not to be sick. Justin Sane comes running in.
FW: Yes?
JS: *panting and babbling incoherently*
FW: What is it?
JS: *trying to pantomime what he can't catch his breath to say*
FW: What is it, boy? Timmy fall down a well?
JS: *pant* Yes....wait...*pant*....no, not......*pant*.....who's the big guy?
FW: Huh?
JS: My *pant* Boss....
FW: Stank?
JS: Yes....*pant*.....him......
FW: Stank fell down a well?
JS: Yes...*pant*....wait....
FW: There's a well on the ship?
JS: No....well, maybe....*pant*
FW: Justin....
JS: OVERBOARD! That's it....*pant*
FW: There's a well overboard?
JS: NO!! Stank fell overboard....*pant*
FW: Is he still.......never mind.
Fire gets quickly to her feet and runs out of the office, Justin following her.
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Post by BookerShark on May 2, 2011 16:26:42 GMT -5
*Firewoman and Justin have made there way back to where Stank has remarkably kept hold of the railing. Fire leans over the railing and looks down at Stank.*
FW - St..Stank!
*Stank looks up at Firewoman.*
Stank - Fire?
*Firewoman vomits all over Lucas Mann. The vomit has no time to settle as it's promptly washed away by yet another crash of the waves.*
FW - Oh gods... I am SOOOOO sorry!
Stank - ... .... ....
FW - What the hell are you doing out there?
Stank - ... ... ... ..
FW - Stank? Stank? Can you hear me? Is he speaking to me? He's not speaking to me Justin.
JS - Maybe we should help him up.
FW - Stank take my hand.
*Stank maintains his silence and his grip as the bow dips below the waves once again and rises up into the air.*
FW - This is crazy. We can't do this. Lucas for fuck's sake, could you at least TRY to climb up?
Stank - You think I HAVEN'T TRIED??
FW - At some point you need to-
Stank - YOU THREW UP ON ME!
FW - I know. And I'm sorry. I didn't mean to.
Stank - JUSTIN!
JS - Yes sir?
*Stank shuts his mouth, trying to time his words for when he is not submerged in the rough waters. He is not successful on that front.*
Stank - Out of EVERYONE on board *GLARGH GURGLE BLARHG BZZZZFFFT PTWOOWEY! COUGH!* You brought FIREWOMAN?
FW - HEY!
Stank - HEY YOURSELF! Are YOU strong *BLupblupblrrrd GURGLE COUGH! COUGH!* ENOUGH to PULL ME UP??
*Firewoman reaches between the rails and grabs onto Stank's wrists and with Herculean (Juno like?) effort she actually begins to pull Stank up a foot... then two. Justin grabs onto Stank's arms and together they pull Stank far enough up the railing, despite the constant dip and rise of the bow, so that Stank is able to gain his footing and climb back over the railing. All three fall to the deck, lying on their backs, catching their collective breaths.*
FW - *pant* *pant* You were saying?
Stank - *pant* You threw up on me. *pant*
JS - *pant* *pant* *pant* canIborrowfivedollars? *pant*
*Stank reaches into his pocket, pulls out his wet wallet, pulls out a soaked five dollar bill, reaches over and pats it on Justin's forehead. Justin simply lies there with the wet bill pasted on his head. Stank loses his grip on the wallet and it slides down toward the bow as it dips, then slides back within reach, as the bow rises.*
Stank - I'm so tired.
FW - We should head inside.
JS - You threw up on him.
Stank - That.
FW - I also saved your life.
JS - That.
Stank - Thank you Fire for saving my life.
FW - You're welcome.
JS - You threw up on him, though.
Stank - That.
FW - Is this going to be a thing?
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Post by BookerShark on May 2, 2011 16:27:41 GMT -5
*Stank is still sprawled on the deck when he hears a really loud belch. He looks up and sees Outback Jack*
S: For a minute I thought I was going to get thrown up on again.
OBJ: No worries, mate, you know you don't have to worry about that with me. I've only just started on my 3rd case of Fosters today.
*OBJ belches again and wanders off*
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Post by BookerShark on May 2, 2011 16:28:21 GMT -5
*Fade in to– “Hey there, loyal OOWF viewers! It’s El Lobo Sangriento coming to you LIVE~! from the HMS Tytanik.”
*Excuse me, Lobo, I’m trying to do a voiceover here.
ELS: Whoa, I can talk to the voiceover guy too? This is great. Also, sorry for interrupting you. Please continue.
*Thank you, Lobo. As I was saying, Fade in to the HMS Tytanik, where we find El Lobo Sangriento…uh…
ELS: Hello? Voiceover Guy?
*Well, Lobo, you’re not really doing anything worth capitalizing. What exactly are you up to?
ELS: Let’s see. A few days ago, I accused CEO Ecosystem of screwing with my Trios match with Texpress, potentially costing us the win. He has yet to acknowledge that promo, so I’m WAITING~! for that. I really don’t know Sparxx, so I was kind of hoping he’d show up and give me something to work with, but I’m still WAITING~! for that too. In the meantime, I guess I’ll HEAD~! over to the Destroyatorium and DRINK~! until someone gets around to it. Wanna come with?
*Sure. Sounds good. Lobo and Voiceover Guy head toward the ship’s Destroyatorium as we *FADE*
ELS: I like the way you “fade,” by the way. It’s got a nice flourish to it.
*Thanks. *FADE*
ELS: I mean, you clearly care about your craft. It shows. I just want you to know it’s appreciated.
*Again, thanks. You know the promo can’t end if you keep talking after I “fade,” right?
ELS: Oh, shit. My bad. Please proceed.
*FADE*
ELS: Nice. Shit, sorry. Last time, I swear.
*Sigh…*FADE*
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Post by BookerShark on May 2, 2011 16:29:11 GMT -5
Stank is still sprawled out on the deck, but about to get to his feet. Just as he's about to, J-P Sparxx walks upon him.
J-PS: Why were you so scared, homie?
S: Fuck you. Drownin' ain't funny.
J-PS: Yeah, like yo ass'd drown.
S: I can't swim.
J-PS: Yeah, but I bet yo fat ass'd float, knowhatI'msayin'?
Stank wants to hit J-P, but he remembers the no fighting rule.
S: Walk away.
J-PS: Or I could waddle. Peoples be lovin' dat shit from Opus.
S: Unlike you. But if you wanna waddle, it doesn't matter how you go away, just go away.
J-PS: Fine. But befo I go, just 'member.
J-P gets in Stank's face.
J-PS: This week, I'll get by Ecosystem, & El Santos Whatever. But I WILL be seein' yo fat ass again. Ya feel me?
S: Next time I "feel" you, is when I'll be breaking your scrawny neck. Feel that. Homie.
J-P backs away, nodding his head.
J-PS: Enjoy da next wave. Ya know one's comin' An' dey keep comin'. Deuces.
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Post by BookerShark on May 2, 2011 16:30:44 GMT -5
*Forner Unforgiven Training Center*
In the soon to be rebranded training center we see numerous people working out and training. Over on some weight benches we see Kai and Firewoman spotting each other. Sydney Wyld is working with Alexis on some agility and rehab drills for her now cast-free arm as she looks like she's training to get back in the ring. Over on the cardio machines we see Ashley and Spencer getting a good workout as well and we also see DH Magnusson and Danny Taylor in one of the extra rings working with some local enhancement talent as they practice tag team moves. Noticeable by her absence is Noelani. And in the main ring we see Alexander and Aina finishing up some ringwork and toweling off as they step through the ropes. We pick up the conversation midway through...
Aina: Seriously, brah?
Alexander: I just think it makes sense. I'm gonna bring it up tonight.
Aina: Well, let them know Kai and I said Aloha.
Alexander: I don't even know what Eco's thinking about it though. He hasn't gotten back to me about it and I know Stank is in his ear about it.
Aina: Your pilialo isn't very happy with you, is she?
Alexander: if you mean Fire, she isn't but I think she understands why I'm doing it.
Aina: Does she know who you're talking to about it?
Alexander: No, and if you can, keep it to yourself for now until I get any definites from anyone.
Aina: Sure thing, brah.
Alexander: You wanna do this interview thing now?
Aina nods and calls over his brother while Alex calls over Fire and Spencer. Kai and Fire finish off their set and make their way over while Spencer wipes her forehead with a towel and Ashley gets drinks for the members of D&D in the ring. Due to the magic of camera work and time delays, Spencer arrives in front of the interview set in a brand new and non-sweaty outfit. As she arrives, the Darling Crest floats down behind her and we see the yin-yang design that is becoming familiar as the sign of the Darlings and their allies.
Spencer: I am standing here with the 4 wrestlers who will be competing in a no holds barred street fight against the Brass Knuckle Kings this week at Mayhem. I've heard that the stipulations for this match were chosen by you, any reason as this would seem to be in their wheelhouse.
Kai: Those kanapapikis have been screwing us for weeks and now we have to start over...so, we start over and this time we're going to play by their rules.
Aina: My brother is right. If those *Hawaiian slang for assholes* want to cheat their way to holding onto those belts, then we'll fight them on their level. We tried doing it the right way, but that didn't work so now we bring the fight to them.
Alexander starts laughing...
Spencer: What do you find funny right now Alex...
Alexander: I've been allies with all 4 guys in the Kings and I never thought they'd be this stupid. These two men right here and reigned in by one thing and one thing only, their own goals. If you take those goals off the table, the only thing left is violence.
Firewoman: And violence is something we all excel in. I've been in battles inside the ring with lots of people. I've won some and I've lost some but the fact is I've loved every one of those battles and some of the only people who love it as much as I do are these gentlemen right here.
Alexander: I was thinking I'd have to try and control Kai and Aina here and then I sat back and thought, why should I? You guys have screwed them voer for weeks and if I tried to control how they handle those agressions, well I'd be as stupid as you guys are.
Spencer: But won't this go against your new attitude of doing things the right way. That there are certain methods that are acceptable and some that are not.
Alexander: Honestly, no. To stand side by side with someone as you go into battle does not mean you have to be the same type of person. The four of us are as different as can be really. Fire here is as graceful as the eagle that flies behind us. Kai and Aina can be as vicious as the wolf frothing at the mouth to defend their pride. And, not to toot my own horn but I bring the balance of both. I can be graceful and fly above the ring or I can get bloody and violent with my Hawaiian brothers here.
Aina: Eric & Bryce...you may not have wanted or asked for this transformation, but it's coming and its your fault.
Kai: What happens next didn't have to happen. We could have continued to fight the good fight, but no more.
Kai and Aina hold up their hands and we see they are carrying their own pairs of brass knuckles.
Alexander: I tried to warn you Kings. I told you this day was coming and you didn't heed it. Now the wolves of war are being unleashed on you and pretty soon you won't have your precious little throne anymore. We're coming for that and we're coming for you.
Spencer: Thank you for your time gentlemen and lady, but there is one other thing I wanted to ask you Alex...your match this past week with the OOWF World Heavyweight Champion Stank went to a no-contest when Chris Evans attacked you. During that attack you were saved by JP Sparxx, any comment.
Alexander: First, Sparxx has balls and is showing me a lot. I don't think I'll ever understand what he's saying but I understand his actions. He didn't have to come out there and save me from a 2 on 1 attack and I know he didn't do it for me. He did it to get his hands on Stank, but the fact remains he did it and anytime he needs a partner for another match with Stank or anyone, all he'll have to do is ask. With regards to Evans he sees the writing on the wall and as his mentor now used to like to say, his 15 minutes of fame are up and he's just grasping at straws for another chance. And for our OOWF World Heavyweight Champ...tick tock Lucas. The countdown is on...tick tock.
*Fade*
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Post by BookerShark on May 2, 2011 16:38:46 GMT -5
*There is a HEATED~! argument going on inside Davin Moreland's locker room, with 3 distinct voices yelling. We can't make out what they say until the Ninjacam swoops in, TNA Reaction-style*
DM: Goddammit JUST FUCKING DO IT!
SDM: *tears streaming down her face, this is as upset as we've ever seen her* There is NO. FUCKING. WAY! Do you underfuckingstand? You are NOT abandoning me again!
OGMSJ: Seriously Davin, this is bullshit.
DM: Shut the fuck up, midget. No one asked you.
SFJ420: YOU shut the fuck up, Davin!
*Everyone kind of stops as Moonbeam's outburst shocks the room*
DM: What did you say?
SFJ420: You heard me! It's always "I have to do this" and "You have to do that". What about what WE want, Davin? Huh? Did you ever take THAT into consideration? I have been with you longer than anyone in this room. I have stood idly by as you dictated how everyone behaves to get the best possible outcome for YOU! But do you ever, EVER once stop to think about what other people think?
DM: *quieter* No. Because I know what I'm doing.
SFJ420: What are we, fucking retarded? For crissakes, Davin. Shawn's an OLYMPIC GOLD MEDALIST! Samantha has been running your "Davin Moreland Inc. LLP" for fucking YEARS, not to mention her own small business that she took international. And me? I've been running your PR for fucking YEARS now! You think I stay with you just because? I play the blonde burnout to set you up for punchlines for 4 YEARS and you have the BALLS to tell ME to leave? Fuck you, Davin.
DM: *sits in a chair* Well? What am I supposed to do, Moonbeam, huh? Tell me. Let that fucking psychopath kidnap you? Torture? Rape?
OGMSJ: No Rape. It's his rule after all.
DM: J-P, Chad, Zane, they're all wrestlers, you know? They can take care of themselves...but you three...especially-
SDM: Stop. Seriously, stop. Are you going out of your way to piss us off?
DM: No, I'm TRYING TO FUCKING PROTECT YOU!
SDM: You can't protect us, Davin. He can just as easily hop on a plane and get to us there. At least this way, we're going to be together most of the time. And if you don't remember, you fucking PROMISED me you'd never even ask me this again. Do you remember that?
DM: Yeah.
SDM: So?
DM: You should still go.
SDM: Davin...FUCK...you're so fucking stubborn.
DM: No, It's ONE thing to threaten me. It's another thing to threaten my wrestler friends. It's yet ANOTHER thing to threaten my fucking family. He's crossing that line? I'm not going to get you jammed up in this. I'm not.
SDM: You don't have a choice.
DM: The hell I don't.
SDM: Let me say this slowly so you understand. You. Don't. Have. A. Choice. WE watched that just like you did, got it? We talked about it, and we unanimously-
OGMSJ: Unanimously-
SFJ420: UNANIMOUSLY-
SDM: -agreed that you're stuck with us, one way or the other. If Moose wants this to be Armageddon? Then he's going to have to deal with the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse first.
DM: I'm pretty sure there's some trademark infringem-
SDM: IT'S IN THE FUCKING BIBLE!
DM: Right.
OGMSJ: So no, Davin, we're not leaving - and you don't have to do this alone. He does. That's the difference. And it's why you'll win.
SFJ420: Moose may understand loyalty and duty, but he certainly doesn't understand family. Or love. You do. He wants this to be good v. evil and love v. hate? You know what wins every single time, don't you?
DM: *sighs* You gonna start talking like a burnout again? I'm sure they've dragged a camera in here by now.
SFJ420: Like, totally whatever dude man pot rules.
DM: Good work. I need drinky.
SDM: I'm pretty sure they've got booze on this boat.
SFJ420: And after, well, we've got-
DM: To call J-P and Jewel over to party?
OGMSJ: What about Chad and Zane?
DM: Eh...not really their kind of party.
*fade*
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Post by BookerShark on May 2, 2011 16:39:56 GMT -5
**As the interview in the training center finishes, Opus waddles in front of the camera, wearing a “Fear the Fraud” pet T-shirt (available now at OOWFShopzone.com). He looks at the camera for a moment, makes a excited noise like the baby penguin in the Coke commercial, and waddles on.**
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Post by BookerShark on May 2, 2011 16:40:32 GMT -5
*We are in the Cape Town arena and Stank is walking toward his office when he is stopped in the hallway of executive privilege by SFJ#1.*
Stank - Nicole I've got a busy schedule. What is it?
SFJ#1 - Interview?
Stank - Fine.
*Camera crew suddenly appears and a OOWF Banner drops from nowhere.*
SFJ#1 - You along with partners Moosehead Jack and the OOWF Intercontinental Champion, Stan Fulton have a shot at your first ever Campeonas de Trios Title at Mayhem this Wednesday.
Stank - Yes and we only have to defeat my former stable to do it. I really shouldn't call Drink & Destroy my former stable because the Drink & Destroy I ran is not the Drink & Destroy we have today. Oh sure, Outback Jack and DH Magnusson are still there, but they've added Dynamite Danny Taylor, and Dashing Victor Deniro who has kept the stable alive it would seem... alive and remade. There was a time I resented that. I wanted Drink & Destroy to die.
SFJ#1 - And now?
Stank - Now? Moose and I came THIS close to killing it... but they proved to be alot more formidable than I gave them credit. We went to war and they survived. Now we go to war again... and THIS time we got Crusher Fulton with us. They may survive, but they won't have those titles when it's done. Nothing personal boys. You may have won my respect, but you won't win that match this Wednesday LIVE (taped) right here in Cape Town South Africa. They call it Midweek Mayhem... you can call it the day you lost the Campeonas del Trios titles.
SFJ#1 - Thank you for your time, champ. Back to you, Russ.
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Post by BookerShark on May 2, 2011 16:41:23 GMT -5
Firewoman is sitting at her desk, which is very neat and put together, doing paper work. Opus is splashing in a baby pool next to the desk. Lucky comes in with some more stuff.
L: Okay, success.
FW: Yeah?
L: Hotel accomodations upgraded throughout our African tour. No staying in huts or mission schools or whatever the hell else was on the docket.
FW: Tent cities?
L: Nope. All hotels, three stars and above.
FW: Good. So, that's done, what else is on the to do list?
L: Um..let's see...quarterly report to the Ohio Athletic Commission.
FW: Done.
L: Um....Ring specs sent to all the venues.
FW: Check.
OtP: *splash splash splash*
L: Various contract riders, stipulations, etc. handled.
FW: Yep.
L: Wow....it usually took Rick a week and three bottles of whiskey to do this.
FW: I think I wanna look at the financials again though. Pretty sure I'll need to have those in order for the quarterly share holders meeting.
L: Yeah, but that's not until June.
FW: So?
L: Amazing....you're.....actually GOOD at this.
FW: I know, right? I doubted it, but....I think....I dunno, Eugenio...
L: My real name? Wow, you must be serious.
FW: For years I never thought there was anything else for me, ya know? Fight fight fight. It's all we did as kids, all I do now....
L: Dying in the ring.
FW: Well, been there, done that, I guess....sorta.....but yeah....I didn't want to be like Flair, or Hogan, or Moolah, even, out there in my 80s doing cheap spots and riding a wave of nostalgia. So I figured, sure. Die young, leave a pretty corpse. But now...when the time comes....I think there's more for me to do, and this could be it...
L: Yeah? Wow...you've really....I guess changed is too small of a word. No more nihilism....
FW: Nope....I got a career
L: Family?
FW: I have Moose.
L: No I mean...you know... Alex...and maybe....
OtP: *splash splash splash*
FW: Let's not get carried away.
L: Oh, speaking of Mr. Firewoman, he's waiting to see you.
FW: Really? Okay.
Opus continues splashing as Lucky leaves to show Alexander in.
AD: Madam Commissioner...
FW: Please don't. And if this is about quitting, I'm not, so unless you want to argue again--
AD: No no....I'm not changing my mind, you are not changing yours so....no, this is about our match this week.
He is joined by Kai and Aina.
FW: Um...okay....
AD: We'd like to make it a no holds barred street match.
FW: Okay...why.
AD: Because you know they'll be using their brass knuckles.
K: Says so right in the name.
AD: And since we're faces, we can't use weapons against them unless--
FW: Really? This again?
AD: And because you like no holds barred street fights.
FW: ....
OtP: *splash splash splash*
FW: I don't know, we've already got the insurance filed for a regular match and--
AD: You can get your weapons back from Sydney.
FW: ....
OtP: *splash splash splash*
FW: Agreed.
AD: Excellent. Thanks.
FW: Whatever...
Fire smiles however, and the Hawaiians and Noelani leave. Alexander lingers behind.
AD: So, you're not still mad?
FW: Furious. I'll just take it out on our opponents rather than you.
AD: How's the tummy.
FW: Better since we hit land, but still kinda queasy. And I'm freaking exhausted, and if you even HINT that it's because of two jobs, I will put you through that wall.
AD: Nope, not saying a thing...just...well you look pale, even for you, so we should make it an early night.
FW: Okay...agreed.
AD: See ya back at the suites.
OtP: *splash splash splash*
FADE
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Post by BookerShark on May 2, 2011 16:42:12 GMT -5
~~~ Chad Madison is sitting alone at Ric's, enjoying a Dagwood-sized sandwich. Naturally, he is approached by a Randomly Numbered Sexy Female Journalist ~~~
RNSFJ: Chad Madison, I was supposed to interview you and your partner LIVE from the Texpress Dressing Room! No one answered the door. What's going on?
Chad: I wasn't there
RNSFJ: Why not?
Chad: I had to leave. It was getting.... really thick in there
RNSFJ: Thick?
Chad: The air. It was so thick and syrupy I nearly went into a diabetic coma
RNSFJ: A Wha? When will you be back there so I can get my interview?
Chad: Not for a long time.
RNSFJ: What about Zane? Where is he?
Chad: He's there. Inside.
RNSFJ: Why didn't he answer the door?
Chad: I'm sure he was busy.
RNSFJ: What's going on in there
Chad: You don't want to know. I don't want to know. It's sickening
RNSFJ: Zane's sick?
Chad: In a manner of speaking, yes
RNSFJ: What?
~~~ Chad puts his arm around the RNSFJ ~~~
Chad: Bridgette arrived last night
RNSFJ: Oh... (Eyes go wide with realization) OOOHHHHHHHHH!
Chad: Yeah. It's not pretty....... But you sure are. Listen, about that interview... How about I give you an exclusive One-On-One tonight? About 8?
RNSFJ: You're not talking about an interview
Chad: Of course..... Not.
RNSFJ: I thought you'd never get around to me!
Chad: I was saving the best for last?
RNSFJ: Awww how sweet! I'll see you at 8!
~~~ She kisses him on the cheek and leaves. Chad smiles and returns to his sandwich ~~~
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Post by BookerShark on May 2, 2011 16:43:04 GMT -5
*Fade in to the Nelson Mandela Memorial Arena, where we find El Lobo Sangriento–
ELS: –INTERRUPTING~! the Voiceover Guy. Dude. Nelson Mandela’s not dead.
*And?
ELS: They don’t call things “Memorial” unless the person it’s named after is dead.
*I didn’t name the arena, Lobo. I’m just the narrator.
ELS: Well, I’d rather you were more considerate in your narration. I damn near had a stroke when I thought Mandela was dead just now.
*I apologize. What would you have me do, though? The arena’s already been named.
ELS: I dunno. You figure it out. You’re the wordsmith.
*Sigh…Okay. Fade in to the Incorrectly Adjectivized Nelson Mandela Memorial Arena…
ELS: Muuuch better.
*…where we find El Lobo Sangriento TAPING~! his wrists in preparation for a sparring session with two trainers who fit the size and skill sets of CEO Ecosystem and JP Sparxx. To save me the agony of being further involved in this promo…
ELS: Hey!
*…SFJ52 approaches, mic in hand…
SFJ: Lobo, any further thoughts on your match this week against the CEO and JP Sparxx?
ELS: Not really, no. I’m approaching this match like I’ve approached all of my Onslaught matches to date. Physical training and mental preparation. That’s all I can do. I have no doubt that it’ll be enough this week to get me a shot at Darling’s title at Total Bloody Annihilation in four weeks.
SFJ: Total Bloody Annihilation?
ELS: Yeah, “TBA”. It’s on the schedule. I don’t want to make you feel bad, but that’s a pretty basic piece of information to not have at this stage.
SFJ: Riiight. On another topic, has Ecosystem commented on your accusation that he removed the Onslaught Rules stipulation from your Trios match at the last minute last week?
ELS: As far as I can tell, the CEO hasn’t commented on anything recently. I can only assume he’s got his hands full running the company. It can’t be easy having one foot in the ring and the other in the Corporate Offices. Anyway, what happened last week has no bearing on my match this week. I’m still not happy that Texpress and I lost, but complaining about it now doesn’t change the result. Now, if you’ll excuse me, my sparring partners have been kept waiting. Voiceover Guy?
*FADE*
ELS: Thank you.
*Lobo, you know the promo isn’t over if you keep talking. Just let me get in that last word from now on, okay? *FADE*
ELS: Right. My bad.
*STOP DOING THAT! *FADE*
ELS: Sorry!
*…*FADE?*
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Post by BookerShark on May 2, 2011 16:44:16 GMT -5
*Fade back in, later, to the Incorrectly Adjectivized Nelson Mandela Memorial Arena, where the ring is already set up! Amazing. We see a single figure inside. The camera zooms in and we see it's Davin, once again sitting on the middle rope (wearing a "Fear Me, I'm a Fraud" t-shirt, with LD Williams' relevant stats on the back).*
*He's got rebar in one hand, and with a big smile on his face, and starts making a waving-in motion to the camera*
DM: Come on Moose. Don't be scared that I'm actually LOOKING this time and can fight back. You want a fight? You want a match? You don't even know what the hell you want but I know this. Right now? There's no Them to distract you. In fact, once this stupid suspension is over - a move that proves you really ARE scared, by the way, no one is buying your version - I have a great idea. I don't give a shit about stips, weapons, whatever, I'll leave all that to you except for one.
DM: You're so concerned about Them? Let's take Them out of the equation, shall we? You can put any other fucking stip you want on it, but I demand this one: It will be an Empty Arena match. That's right, Them will have to head for the exits before it even starts. That gives you no excuses, no outs, no more chickenshit, no more pussy behavior.
DM: It's become very obvious that you're scared of me, Moose. And that's not like you. Why do I scare you so much to elicit this behavior? You don't need to answer. Because I know. And the answer is, because you know. You know that when the chips are all in the middle of the table, you don't have what it takes.
DM: It's not about titles. We both have those. It's not about legacy. We both have that too. It's not about the Hall of Fame. We're both first-ballot locks. It may be about a lot of other things, but let's be honest with each other Moose.
DM: This is about Pride.
DM: Hubris. Sack. Testicular Fortitude. Cajones. Balls, Moose. This is about the two alpha dogs who have finally bumped up against each other's territory. I don't know exactly what triggered it - but all I know is that your actions have screamed "running scared" ever since you decided to make this personal. If I really believed you thought I was a Diva, I'd be offended, Moose. But I know it's just words. You've seen for yourself first hand what I can do, and what I'm capable of. And for some reason, it finally threatened you, and you snapped, and it's come to this.
DM: So if you want to wait for a match, Moose, that's your prerogative. If you're true to your word though, I'm right here. Come on in. We'll solve this one without a Box Office. Wouldn't that really screw Them over?
*fade*
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Post by BookerShark on May 2, 2011 16:45:14 GMT -5
The camera comes on, and we see the face of a random camera guy with a nasty scar on his face. He’s got a wrench clenched between his teeth and is holding a screwdriver.
RCG (to himself): I think I got it…
He begins turning the camera over and around, and we see that the nasty scar wasn’t a scar but rather a crack in the camera lens.
RCG: IT’S WORKING!!!
The camera guy picks up the camera and we see that he is in some kind of cave. He begins walking down the length of the cave, and we hear voices coming from further along in the cave.
Voice #1: I told you to stick to the plan and everything would be fine.
Voice #2: I stuck to the plan.
Voice #1: And what part of the plan had you breaking the camera on the very first day we started to climb the mountain?
Voice #2: I…I got angry and lost control.
Voice #1: And what did I tell you about that?
Voice #2: Not to do it anymore.
Voice #1: Correct. So our only opportunity for sending information back to the real world to keep you relevant was scrapped, and instead it’s now been almost a month since any of the fans or other roster members have heard anything from us.
Voice #2: I’m sorry.
Voice #1: You should be. My plan was very simple. We were going to release the information I wanted released and keep you somewhat relevant so that when we returned next week, it would mean something. Now, we’ve been gone so long, I’m not even sure if we’ll be able to get you a return match.
The camera guy comes around a corner in the caves and we see that the voices belong to IQ and Psykle.
RCG: Hey! I got the camera working again!
IQ: Finally! Now we can get some information back to the real world. Alright, you stand there, we’ll stand here and address the people. Ready?
The camera guy moves to where IQ indicated and aims the camera at Psykle and IQ.
IQ: Hello OOWF world. Psykle and I must apologize for our absence, but an unfortunate incident occurred with the camera on the first day of our trip, and the promised updates we planned to give you were unable to be kept up with. Let me fill you in on where we’ve been though. Our first stop on the trip was an old monastery in the mountains of Tibet. We spent a week there retraining Psykle in the ancient meditation techniques specialized in by the brothers at that monastery, before moving on to our next destination. Our next destination was…you know what? It’s not that important. What is important is that we are coming back. We will be back at Mayhem on May 11th, and Psykle, what do you want to say about that?
Psykle: Hi Sandra! I’m coming back, babe!
IQ: WOULD YOU FORGET ABOUT THE STUPID FEMALE JOURNALIST!?!?!?!
Psykle: I thought it stood for SEXY Female Journalist.
IQ slaps his head to his forehead in exasperation.
Psykle: Sorry, guess that’s not what you meant.
IQ: As you can see, Psykle no longer has the rage that initially had him on the short list of people who might be thrown out of the OOWF for excessive violence. While the camera hasn’t been working, my cell phone and computer have, so I’ve kept in contact with the OOWF Board about Psykle’s progress and they’ve agreed to let him back in the ring, however, the referees still refuse to officiate his matches, and as such, the board and I came to an agreement, and I have received my own license as a referee and until such time as Psykle proves that he can control himself, I will be refereeing his matches. Now, the only question is, who to face first when we get back? Interestingly enough, one of those that people thought was my charge’s mentor has since made his way back to the OOWF, so, Moosehead Jack, why don’t you step up and agree to be Psykle’s first opponent when he comes back? I’ll referee the match, and you have my guarantee that I will call it down the middle, but to make it a little better for you, I’ll let you pick the stipulations, within reason, for the match. Now, obviously, I’m not going to let you make it a 30 on 1 handicap match, but if you want to make it no DQ, no countout, falls count anywhere, barbed wire baseball bat match, that’s fine. As long as the stipulation is fair to both participants, we’ll accept it. See you all on the 11th.
Fade to black.
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Post by BookerShark on May 2, 2011 16:55:02 GMT -5
*Samantha is watching OOWF-TV. Davin is responding to some fan mail when she calls him over*
SDM: Davin, you gotta see this.
DM: *looks up* What, did Moose respond or something?
SDM: Possibly better, look at this.
*She rewinds the DVR*
DM: So, the Board lets Managers ref the matches of the people they manage? There's no fucking way. None.
SDM: You're missing the bigger picture here.
DM: Am I?
SDM: Who did he want to face?
DM: Moose. So what? Everyone wants to kick his ass.
SDM: Davin...think about it.
DM: ...
SDM: What kind of licenses did you sign up for a couple weeks ago?
DM: Um, SFJ license, dog license, License to Ill...
SDM: And?
DM: *dawning on him* A referee's license.
SDM: There ya go.
DM: So, since you're as dubious as I am that the Board actually let this guy ref the match of the guy he manages, because that's the most ridiculous thing I've probably ever heard - perhaps I should have a chat with Madam Commissioner, and offer my services.
SDM: To Referee.
DM: Ew. I'm only a Darling by marriage.
SDM: HEY!
DM: Well? You're my representative, right? Want to take a walk?
SFJ420: *catching the end of the conversation* Fuck that, D. We're all taking a walk, man.
DM: Fair enough. This will be one of those rare situations where this works out well for everyone.
OGMSJ: *getting some papers together* Except Moose.
DM: Well, fuck that guy.
*fade*
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Post by BookerShark on May 2, 2011 18:24:46 GMT -5
Kai is sitting and eating a peanut butter & banana sandwich and video chatting on his laptop. We can not see who he's chatting with, but the girl's voice is familiar.
GV: DO IT DO IT DO IT!!
Kai: No Selena.
The camera pans around behind Kai and we see Selena's face on the chat screen.
Sa-T: C'mon, it's good. Really.
Kai: Really?
Sa-T: Really. Do it!
Kai: No.
Sa-T: C'mon. It's his birthday. And he's your people...
Kai: He's Samoan. And only half.
Sa-T: Samoans are Polynesians, just like Hawai'ians.
Aina, who was sitting in the corner reading the newspaper and we didn't even realize it, drops his paper.
Aina: She's right, brah.
Sa-T: See! Living here is teachin' me stuff.
Kai: Fine, I'll do it.
Sa-T: YAY!!!
We hear Humphrey bark and splash in the background. Kai stands, looks at the camera and clears his throat. He then arches his eye brow.
Sa-T: Omigosh, you did it.
Kai: Brass Knuckle Kings, Eric O'Mac and Bryce...something. You know what? IT DOESN'T MATTER WHAT YOUR NAME IS!! The Kai is coming to Cape Town for one reason and one reason only. He's coming to lay the smackdown on your candy asses! You think you're so hot. You think you're so good. Well I think you're a pair of jabronis that bathe in monkey crap!
Selena laughs.
Kai: You bring your titles. You bring your friends. You bring your brass knuckles. You bring your poontang pie. That's right, the Kai says you have poon tang!
Selena laughs hysterically.
Kai: Me and my bruddah are gonna take your brass knuckles, maybe the ring steps. Maybe even the ring bell. And we're gonna turn those son bitches sideways, and stick 'em straight up. Your Candy Asses!
Sa-T: HAHAHAH You said ass! HAHAHAHAHA.
Kai: IF YA SMELL LALALALALALAOW. What the Kai. Is. Cookin'!
Kai arches his eyebrow for the camera as the Rock's music begins to play (how we got the rights to it, well, that's management's issue). Aina shakes his head, amused, and Selena laughs and claps.
Sa-T: Happy birthday Dwayne!
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Post by BookerShark on May 4, 2011 16:55:01 GMT -5
*Bryce Larson is on the phone with Eric O'Mac. Through the magic of Samantha Darling Moreland helping us out, we can see both conversations via split screen.*
Bryce: Dude, where are you?
Eric: I'm in Miami.
Bryce: Miami?
Eric: Yeah.
Bryce: You've been in Miami all weekend?
Eric: No. I was in Pakistan this weekend. Had to help out an old friend take out some guy in a house. Don't believe a word you hear - I killed a guy using a brass knuckle shot.
Bryce: Really?
Eric: Yeah. Tytan was with us. He used a shovel on the guy, but the guy no sold it.
Bryce: That's slightly awesome.
Eric: Only slightly. What's new on your end?
Bryce: Well, I've got some news...
Eric: It's not my fruit business, is it? I swear, if you fuck up my fruit business...
Bryce: No, the fruits are fine. In fact, Davin picked up some blueberries. And I sent Stank a Get Well Soon basket with some watermelon.
Eric: Dude!
Bryce: What?
Eric: That's so fucking racist. Send him another basket apologizing.
Bryce: Oh shit. I'll get on it. It was Matt Folz' idea anyways.
Eric: Yeah, send that to him fast, before he gets pissed off.
Bryce: Well, our eight man tag team match this week has been changed to No Holds Barred.
Eric: Shocking. The good people couldn't beat us in a fair fight, so they want to throw the rules out.
Bryce: I think what they decided was that we were going to break the rules, so they might as well.
Eric: Whatever. I've gotta go. Dwayne just showed up.
Bryce: Wait, Dwayne? Where did you say you were?
Eric: My hometown. Miami, Florida. It's Dwayne's birthday party...he and Dad invited me to hang out backstage.
Bryce: I'm pretty sure you are going to get fined for this.
Eric: I'm pretty sure they can't tell me where I spend my days off.
Bryce: They think they can.
Eric: If they want to fine me, that's ok. Money is just money. I'm basically paying my own salary anyways.
Bryce: Will you be back for Mayhem?
Eric: Maybe. I'm working on something big. If I'm not back, ask Ecosystem to fill in for me. He doesn't like Alex or Fire. Who else are we facing?
Bryce: The Flyin Hawaiians?
Eric: Yeah, haven't we beat them before?
Bryce: Lots of times.
Eric: It only makes sense that we face them again then. So much for back of the line. *yells off phone* WAIT UP!
Bryce: Sounds like you gotta go.
Eric: I'm not the President of Team Bring It for no reason.
*click*
*Fade out.*
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Post by BookerShark on May 4, 2011 16:56:05 GMT -5
*Darling Locker Room*
It's late at night and the only light in the room is coming from a laptop computer. We don't have night vision on these cameras so we can only pick up what is being said by Alexander...
Alexander: You're sure you want to do this.
Unknown Female Voice. Yes. I've said so a lot already.
Alexander: But...
UFV: But nothing. I'm bored and this will be good.
Alexander catches something out on his peripheral vision and says a quick goodbye to whoever he was talking and closes the laptop...The light turns on and we see Firewoman wiping her eyes.
Firewoman: What are you still doing awake babe?
Alexander: Just finishing up some business, dear. Go back to sleep, I'll be there in a few minutes.
Fire: Um, are you sure it's nothing I can help with.
Alexander: I'm sure.
Fire nods and heads back to bed after turning off the light. We see Alexander lean back on the couch and take a deep sigh. We hear him quickly mumble...
Heavy is the head that wants the crown...
...as we *Fade*
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Post by BookerShark on May 4, 2011 16:57:32 GMT -5
*We fade in to Davin's locker room. Samantha, Moonbeam and Shawn all appear ready to go, each carrying folders or briefcases. Davin comes out, tightening his tie and adjusting his jacket. He looks at the 3 sitting and waiting, and smiles*
DM: Good morning, Angels.
*All three sort of look at each other and shrug*
SDM/SFJ420/OGMSJ: Good Morning, Charlie!
DM: *laughing* Cute. Ready to go?
SDM: Yeah, we're just waiting for you.
DM: Good, let's go.
*We see them all walking, sort of like the end of the opening of Law & Order. Eventually, they come to the Commissioner's Office. They enter without knocking. Lucky is at the reception desk*
L: Davin? Everyone? Do you have an...HEY! You can't just go in there!
*Ignoring the little Yankees fan, they waltz right into the office, where Firewoman is watching the "Dancing with the Stars" show where Jericho gets voted off. She sees them come in and quickly turns it off.*
OGMSJ: He got hosed. He's not good enough to be a champ like me, but he still got hosed.
FW: He's plenty good - Ok, WHY are you here? Why didn't Lucky st...I haven't even had my...DAMMIT WHAT? Ugh...pass me that trash can?
*Samantha walks the trash can over to Fire's desk, and also pulls out a bag of peppermints, and puts it on the desk*
FW: *looking a little peaked now* What's this?
SDM: Peppermints. Works wonders.
FW: Wonders? For...
SDM: Seasickness?
*At that moment, Opus comes in and rips the bag open, stealing some peppermints and going over to his pool*
O: *splash splash splash unwrap suck suck suck crunch*
FW: Right. Seasickness. Since we're on land and all. I guess, thanks.
SDM: Less coffee wouldn't kill you either.
O: *unwrap suck suck suck crunch*
FW: Well, right now I'm on NONE, so what do you want?
DM: Madam Commissioner...
FW: Dammit YOU started that, and I fucking hate you for it.
DM: *deadpan* Madam Commissioner, it has recently come to my attention that OOWF Talent "Psykle" is ready to return to active competition. The issue with that is that the OOWF Referees refuse, with good reason in my opinion, to be involved in any of his matches after his violent outburst prior to his departure.
FW: You know this for a fact?
DM: Well, Senior Referee Hightower says it's a fact. And Angelo told me there is NO FUCKING WAY...he said to tell you that in all capital letters...that he would ref another one of his matches.
FW: Ok, let's, for the sake of argument, assume that I didn't read that promo.
DM: That's fine Madam Commissioner-
O: *unwrap suck suck suck crunch splash splash splash*
FW: Can you stop with that?
SFJ420: Like, Madam Commissioner-
FW: Was I talking to you?
SFJ420: With all due respect, Madam Commissioner, when you talk to one of us, man. You like, totally talk to all of us, dude.
FW: *sighs and grabs a peppermint of her own* Continue.
SFJ420: Madam Commissioner...
FW: You're all just trying to piss me off, right?
SDM: Madam Commissioner, that IS your title, and it would be inappropriate to address you in an informal matter when we're discussing legitimate business matters.
O: *crunch*
FW: *sighs and this time doesn't even speak, just waves her hand at Moonbeam*
SFJ420: Madam Commissioner-
FW: I hate you all.
SFJ420: Madam Commissioner, like, Psykle's manager...Something IQ or whatever, said that he like, talked to the Board of Directors, man. Dude, he seems to think that they will like, let him ref Psykle's matches. Which is like totally bullshit because he's reffing the matches of the guy he manages. Totally unfair, man.
FW: I haven't heard from the Board, but it does seem like there would be a competitive disadvantage there. Assuming their decision isn't final, what do you propose I do about it?
O: *crunch*
FW: That's enough Opus.
O: *splash splash splash*
OGMSJ: Madam Commissioner, we propose that since Davin has recently received his Referee's License-
DM: Along with my License to Ill...
OGMSJ: What does that even mean?
SDM: It's a Beastie Boys-
OGMSJ: YOU'RE SO OLD!
O: *crunch*
FW: I have friends that will shoot you all. Point. Get to it.
SDM: Madam Commissioner, since Davin has a Referee's License and apparently nothing better to do, we propose that at next week's Midweek Mayhem you book Psykle's requested match: Psykle vs. Moosehead Jack.
FW: Fine. Done. Are YOU done?
SDM: Madam Commissioner, we propose one added stipulation to that match.
FW: Fine. Wait. How are we going to have a match without a refer...ohhhh...I get it. Davin, you are a sneaky sonofabitch, aren't you?
DM: No Madam Commissioner, I truly feel that adding Davin Moreland as the Special Guest Referee to the Psykle vs. Moosehead Jack match would be in the best interest of the company.
FW: Sure you do.
O: *crunch*
FW: I SAID NO MORE!
O: *splash splash splash*
FW: Ok, so let me get this straight. Next week, Live! at Midweek Mayhem *cheap pop* it will be the returning Psykle, in a rematch against Moosehead Jack - with Davin Moreland as a Special Guest Referee?
DM: Yes, Madam Commissioner.
FW: I'll be honest, I don't love it - but considering I don't have anyone ELSE to ref the match, I don't see how I have any other choice. You'll of course call things right down the middle?
DM: Of course, Madam Commissioner.
FW: Right. Ok, fine. Have Lucky draw up-
SDM: We took the liberty of drawing up the contract for you Madam Commissioner. We just need you and Davin to sign it.
*Firewoman tries to read it, but then sheepishly takes out her reading glasses to do so*
O: *waddle waddle waddle SWIPE waddle waddle waddle splash unwrap suck suck suck crunch splash*
FW: Did you just steal my peppermints you little shit? I told you NO MORE!
O: *splash splash splash*
FW: *finishes reading* Yeah, ok, nothing crazy in there or anything. *She signs and hands it to Davin*
DM: Honey, could you?
SDM: Huh?
DM: Carpal Tunnel I think. I've signed thousands of autographs since I got off the boat.
FW: Thanks for doing that 2 AM autograph signing, Davin. I was afraid no one would show up.
DM: My pleasure, Madam Commissioner. The fans sign our paychecks after all.
O: *crunch*
FW: FOR FUCK'S SAKE!
O: *splash splash splash*
FW: So if you can't sign it-
SDM: Oh, that's ok Madam Commissioner. We're all legally authorized representatives for Davin.
FW: Isn't that cute.
*Samantha signs it*
FW: Ok, fine. Done. Anything else?
DM: No Madam Commissioner. Thank you for your time.
*They go walking out of the office and we hear Fire yelling "NO! BAD OPUS! THOSE ARE MINE!"*
SDM: So what the hell IS your plan, honey?
DM: I'm thinking about it. All I know is, Karma's a bitch. And I don't mean Awesome Kong.
SFJ420: Do you like, need a shirt, man?
DM: No, I think I have one lying around that still fits. Good work, Angels.
SDM/SFJ420/OGMSJ: Thank you, Charlie!
*fade*
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Post by BookerShark on May 4, 2011 16:58:41 GMT -5
Moosehead Jack is awoken by a blooping sound from his laptop. He mumbles a few words edited for PG ratings standards in South Africa, and heads over to his laptop.
He sees a video chat request from "NipponGymRaven55". He clicks OK.
MHJ: Good morning, Little Bird.
A'isha al-Takriti pops up on the screen and gives Moose a look that could kill.
Aa-T: Only Pops calls me that and it's been years. How did you know that?
MHJ: I know lots of things.
Aa-T: Fair enough. And it's late night here.
MHJ: I don't care.
Aa-T: Wow, someone got up on the wrong side of the park bench this morning.
Moose smirks.
MHJ: So, I assume you've been following OOWF-TV?
Aa-T: I have.
MHJ: Did you like what I did to Diva? The suspension was brilliant.
Aa-T: Not really.
MHJ: Oh c'mon.
Aa-T: You seem to be missing the point, Ket. Or at least I'm questioning your motivation.
MHJ: Okay, fine, explain it to me then if you're so smart.
Aa-T: Well, do you want to beat Davin Moreland. Do you want to embarrass him? Or do you want to eliminate him completely?
MHJ: D. All of the above.
Aa-T: Well, then getting him suspended fails miserably.
Moose glares at A'isha.
Aa-T: Don't glare Jack. It makes your eyes look small.
MHJ: I'm calling bullshit.
Aa-T: Yeah, you would, you stubborn ol' mule. Look at it this way. If you're wanting to eliminate him, you can't get him in a match now, can you?
MHJ: I'll be the first to admit, Davin is as tough as they come. I've thrown everything at him but the kitchen sink...
Aa-T: THEN THROW THE KITCHEN SINK! If you want him eliminated, don't pussyfoot around and wait for him to quit. He's not gonna!
Moose sits back in his chair.
Aa-T: Davin and Pops are actually a lot alike. They both think the world revolves around them. They both like being in charge of things. They both enjoy the adulation they get. But they're both also getting older by the day. Injuries start adding up. I saw it with Pops before he retired. The small injuries started to get to him. He lost any resemblance of power within the Five. He started losing matches he'd easily win years before. He wasn't the same. He knew it. Everyone knew it. He lost interest. Add that to his new wife slash plaything, and he simply didn't want to do it anymore. The spotlight wasn't big enough anymore.
Now, Davin, on the other hand, his spotlight keeps getting bigger. This suspension? Best thing that could have happened to him.
MHJ: How so?
Aa-T: The fans are eating it up. He's more over now than before. PLus he gets a month away from the ring to heal up any nagging injuries. Meanwhile, you keep wrestling, risking injury. He's coming out of this golden. You, well, some feel like you look like a pussy.
Moose stands up, kicking back his chair.
MHJ: I've had about enough of your crap, A'isha.
A'isha shrugs.
Aa-T: Just telling you what I see and hear.
MHJ: I will destroy The Diva once and for all. Trust Me.
A'isha arches her eyebrows.
Aa-T: Talk is cheap, Ket.
Moose slams his laptop closed. He grabs HDBII and shatters the lightbulb in his dressing room and the room goes black.
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Post by BookerShark on May 4, 2011 16:59:22 GMT -5
Regicide is seen with SFJ...really who cares what number she is.)
SFJ: Gentlemen you have a match against Texpress at Mayhem what's your thoughts?
Tytan:Boys, you seem to have come under a bit of bad luck lately. Last time I heard you wanted to once we got to the next location..what was LD...
LD: They wanted to rethink there strategy. Strategy, the best strategy for you two is to just go the hell away and quick why you can still walk.
Tytan: You know LD maybe they will put those masks on and come back as Phantos and Lucios.
LD: At least then they were a better team, what did they call themselves.
Tytan: The measuring stick of the tag team division. You know what? Maybe it's time we take that measuring stick and use that to beat there asses to oblivion.
LD: There's a thought, Texpress you guys are a bunch of has beens in this division and you are the first step in us taking what is ours.
SFJ: The tag-team titles?
Tytan: There's no other reason to be here. Those titles mean you are the best and we have held those titles several times with different partners each time. So what does that say about us?
SFJ: Well it-
LD: It means we know what it takes to be the best because we have done it over and over again.
Tytan: So Texpress, you were once the kings of this division. We are Regicide we are the killer of kings. So consider this when you head to the ring. That is your funeral procession!
LD: Sleep well Texpress for Mayhem
Tytan: YOU DIE!
(FADE)
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Post by BookerShark on May 4, 2011 17:00:55 GMT -5
Firewoman is still in her office, along with all the referees. They look fairly unhappy, but Referee Hightower is speaking for them.
RJH: So what you're saying is...
FW: What I'm saying is that you can't be pissed off at Davin Moreland for being a referee in a match you are all refusing to work.
RJH: We clearly are.
FW: Then you're clearly delusional. And you're clearly also this close to being unemployed in Africa with no way of getting home.
RJH: You wouldn't.
FW: I would in a heartbeat. See that file cabinet drawer there? Know what's in there? Applications. Applications to be wrestlers, production assistants, sexy female journalists, lighting crew, secretarial staff, box office attendants, advertising sales agents and .... guess what else?
RJH: Referee?
FW: Yep. At least 30 of them, last time I looked. I can have another team of referees staffed and ready to go before you all can even start crying about it.
RJH: So ... let me make sure I understand you...
FW: Next referee who refuses to work a match after this week is gone.
SG: She can't do that, can she?
RJH: *sighing* The commissioner DOES have the ability to hire and fire staff....
FW: And in my last conversation with the board, they were less than thrilled with your little coup attempt. So they're behind me on this.
RJH: ...
Refs: ...
FW: So...we're good?
RHJ: Yes...we'll...I dunno, draw straws or something.
FW: Good...now...I have somewhere to be. Get out of my office.
The referees leave, somewhat abashed. Firewoman gently picks up Opus out of the pool, gently dries him off with a towel, scritches him between the eyes, and then picks him up, cradling him, and goes back to her suite. Awww....
Time passes, and Fire is sitting at a table with some drinks, and with Kai and Aina.
Aina: So, we talkin' about our match?
FW: We'll wait for Alex, he should be here shortly.
Kai: Almost like the whole crew together again, eh? Now with Fire on board...just gotta get Ket and Poe and....
Aina hits Kai as Firewoman glares into her drink.
Kai: Oh...sorry Fire...we cool, right? I mean, bygones and all that?
FW: Yeah, we're cool. People change. Hell, I even worked with Omar for a while so....
Aina: Too bad we can't get Ket on board...
FW: Please stop calling him that. And it's not going to happen while...you know....
Kai: Man, they should just get along...like you said, you worked with Poe and he done near took you out.
Aina: I think we should just not talk about that.
FW: Yes...thank you.
*silence...then Aina starts smiling*
FW: What?
Aina: 'member that time? You and Kai and then Sydney walk in......DAAAAAAMN she was pissed.
FW: Her normal state of being....
Kai: That wasn't funny...Poe was a lot more controlling then, and I got in a lot of trouble.
Aina: *still laughing* Still....always thought you and Kai would be...you know...closer....NEVER figured you and Alex--
Kai: No way brah....I couldn't keep up with her....
The three laugh a bit.
Kai: Alex must be DA MAN for--
But he's interrupted as Alex does walk up, and everyone gets quiet all of a sudden.
AD: What?
Kai: Nothing.
Aina: Nothing.
FW: Nothing.
There's a moment of silence, and then all three bust out laughing. Alexander sits down, annoyed.
AD: Great....glad you're feeling better, Fire...okay let's talk about our match.
*FADE*
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Post by BookerShark on May 4, 2011 17:01:47 GMT -5
CUT to a small, not-well-lit locker room backstage at the Good Hope Centre. Barely able to move about in this small room is The Crusher Stan Fulton. He and the INC are continually bumping into each other.
INC: “Sorry.”
SF: “No problem. Sorry.”
INC: “Yep. I suppose I should get out of here. You obviously know I’m here and there’s really not room for me.”
SF: “Yeah, I suppose so. Well, good day to you.”
INC: “Did you want to quick promo before I go?”
SF: “Meh. None of my other teammates have made much to do about this match. I’m sure Davin will make a run-in on Moose and cost us the match.”
Kayfabe attempts to get in the room and pummel Fulton, but there’s just not space for her to do so. All we see is an arm thrust around the door futilely reaching for Fulton whilst pushing on the door trying to get in.
SF: “Enough, Kay. There’s not room for you in here. I’ll be near Ric’s Sub Shoppe in about an hour. You can try for me there.”
The arm gives Fulton the finger and withdraws.
INC: “You’re really telling her where you’ll be?”
SF: “She knew already. She always knows.”
INC: “About that promo...”
SF: “Very well.”
Fulton carefully turns towards the camera, but since it’s so tight in this room the shot is only of his forehead.
SF: (voice coming from somewhere below his forehead) “Danny, DH, Jack. Stank’s said it succinctly enough. You’re not the original Drink & Destroy and he’s going to take your belts away from you.
“Now I have nothing against you guys. Heck, I was almost one of you. So I respect the hell out of what you guys have accomplished. Victor’s got you working well together.
“But no matter how vicious or bloody you can be, you cannot match that violence against what Moose and Stank, or even myself, are capable of. You will lose those Trios titles tomorrow night.”
Fulton gets the INC out the door with a bit of force.
SF: “Enjoy the pain.”
Fulton shuts the door in the camera dude’s face as we FADE.
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Post by BookerShark on May 4, 2011 17:02:35 GMT -5
<SFJ13 catches up with Moose in his room in the basement>
SFJ13: Moose you have been uncharacteristically quiet this week. Would you care to comment on your match with Stank and Stan Fulton? You face the OOWF Campeonas de Trios champions Drink & Destroy.
<Moose takes a long time to answer. He takes a long puff off of his cigar then speaks>
MHJ: 13 are you familiar with the Golden Rule?
SFJ13: He who has the gold makes the rules?
MHJ: <smirking> That is one form of it. I will get to that one in a moment. The Golden Rule says "do unto others as you would want done unto you."
<Moose pulls his hair back from his forehead revealing scars, then stands up and pulls his shirt off revealing scars on his chest, then slowly turns and shows the scars on his back. He turns back and looks at the camera>
MHJ: Jack, DH, Danny.......take a good look at those. I know I am not alone. I know Jack has his share of scars, I put a lot of them there. What I want you boys to understand is this. This is not personal........not anymore. Stank and I proved what we had to prove. I want you to think about this.......every scar on my body........every gash, every wound, every stitch.......I remember them all. This one here <pointing to his chest>........Darling. This one here........<moving his hair showing a nasty scar on his head> that one is from Gator. This one here.....<Moose shows a scar on his ribs>......this was a rib that broke through the skin, courtesy of Stank. The fact is, all of these scars are personal to me. I invite them, the pain.........the pain makes me who I am. So boys, this week, I want you to understand that when I slice your foreheads open.......when I spit your eyebrows open.......when I use any weapon I can to make you bleed.........the act is not personal. I expect it in return. I welcome it in return. The game is......who can stand it longer. Who is willing to take more punishment? How much do those Trios titles mean to you?
SFJ13: You mentioned the other version of the Golden Rule......
MHJ: Those who have the gold, make the rules. That is also true. Now, I have heard talk, a lot of talk, about the five of us teaming. I have heard rumors that it is a power grab, I have heard rumors that there are some already working against us trying to remove some of us from positions of power.
<Moose just smirks>
MHJ: I have said it before, and I will say it again, when you expect nothing, but get everything, that is destiny. A certain overrated hack in McMahonland has ruined the word destiny, but make no mistake about it, when we want power, when we want MORE power, it is ours for the taking. Call it destiny, call it the natural order of things, it really doesn't matter, that is how it is.
SFJ13: Psykle has challenged you to a return match at next weeks MidWeek Mayhem, and Davin Moreland wants to be the special guest referee
MHJ: Psykle......do you think that because referees are afraid to get in the ring with you and officiate your matches that I am afraid of you? Is that what you think? Do you think you are going to come back here and make a name for yourself at MY expense? Listen big man, because I will only say this once. You have your match. When I am done with you, you will go back to the land of cage fights and drunken tough man contests and let them know that you couldn't hang in the OOWF. It's almost sad that your OOWF career will be over before it really starts.
SFJ13: And Davin Moreland as special guest referee? And Aisha's comments about your strategy against him?
MHJ: Aisha means well, but sometimes she doesn't realize that what you see, is not always what is real. I will get Davin in a match. And when I do, I will beat him. From there, where do we go? Davin wants an empty arena match? Davin, when the time comes, whether we are in front of 60,000 people, or not a soul, it won't matter. Aisha, sometimes, the hunt is better than the kill. This is not the Davin Moreland that I am going to defeat. Oh no. This Davin Moreland is not ready.
<Moose looks to the side and picks up a pic and looks at it almost longingly. He runs his finger down the photo and speaks>
MHJ: So young. In the prime of her life really. An athlete, a role model. Davin.......do you know where your sheep are? Can you protect them? Will you protect them? It would be a shame if something were to happen to her. It would be a shame if one of your........family.........met an unfortunate end. Protect her Davin. Worry about her. Do all you can to keep an eye on her.......I know I will be.
Trust me
<Moose laughs and walks away. He drops the photo and we see it is Shawn Johnson>
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Post by BookerShark on May 4, 2011 17:03:25 GMT -5
Back in Commissioner the Firewoman's office, we join the conversation with Lucky, Stank, and Justin Sane already in progress...
FW: So, I think that'll take care of the State Department Travel advisory problems.
JS: I don't get it....
Sta: For the LAST time....Lucky? Read it back to him.
L: Sure...."While intracontinental travel--
JS: But Africa is all one continent?
FW: Intra is 'within the same continent.'
JS: Dudes! We should totally have an Intracontinental Championship Belt!
FW: Um, I'll put that on the maybe list, okay?
JS: YES!
Justin does the victory fist pump as Fire, Stank and Lucky shake their heads.
FW: Justin? Can you get me another caramel mocha? And maybe...um.....cheese and Ritz crackers?
JS: Yes, milady!
Justin bows with a flourish and leaves.
Sta: Crackers and cheese with a caramel mocha?
FW: What? It sounds good. Like AMAZINGLY good.
L: ANYWAY..."While intracontinental travel has recently been shifted to the responsibility of the individual performer, due to the possible increase in instability, OOWF will be providing chartered transportation for all employees that wish to take advantage of it."
FW: Sounds good.
Sta: So....planes?
FW: Or buses.....
JS: *coming back in with the coffee and crackers* Oooo!! What about camel caravan when we head north!!!
FW: Um...I'll put that on the maybe pile too, okay?
JS: AWESOME!
*fade*
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